02x17 - Penalty Game

[bunniefuu]

It's a penalty game, so you have to do whatever I say...

Ngah! This is bugging me!

She has been like this day and night since the Daihasei Festival!

Sissy, just who is it you are talking to

in such a sweet, enticing voice?

What should I have you do first...?

A-A cheek rub? Sissy, who is... who is...

...just who is that fluffy pillow standing in for?!

I'm always running after you

"A Certain Magical Index II" I'm always running after you

"A Certain Magical Index II" You are my ideal

You are me

There was a bird that could not fly any farther than this

It rebuked the blue skies on fine, flawless wings

This place is not that bad

That sky is not that high

This place is not that good

Afraid of the speed it would feel in its body

Everybody has a chance,

but they cannot go any farther

The truth is they cannot take flight

The truth is they want to take flight

Right now, beyond the wish I want to make come true

you shine

In my eyes I picture you

"Standing in the future, always strong,"

and that "you" is me

You are still blindingly bright

but in the same spirit, I reach out my hand

and the "I" who I am will someday grab hold to become

the you that I will be

"Look! Look!

While Misaka was in the hospital, everyone's clothes changed,"

says Misaka Misaka--waah!

Your clothes keep you too cool, dummy.

For that matter, don't go crawling over the lap of someone

who still isn't well, and just got discharged

to look outside, you dirty little brat.

"How mean! Misaka still isn't well, either, you know,"

--says Misaka Misaka-- --Okay, okay, that's enough!

You can finish your heartwarming squabble

once we arrive at our new residence, if you please.

So, where is this new residence?

For the time being, it's with a friend of mine.

You're dropping out of the school you're in now, right?

I'm through with anything having to do with that Level business.

The person I'm setting you up with is not in the research field.

I'm sure she's someone who will take your side.

Hmph...

So now there's one more of these idiots, huh?

I want to meet someone...

What did you do that for?!

Oh, when you say it, Kami, it just sounds sarcastic.

When you set off a request like that,

all the weird girls in the area start popping up.

Oh, yeah. Knowing you, Kami,

we'll have everything from super-computer robot girls

to hot spring fairy girls who end up doing heaven only knows what.

That being said, take a look at this.

"Stiff shoulder holder."

Appearances to the contrary, my shoulders are terribly stiff.

I'm absolutely sure this will help, but what do you think, Kami?

Ha! That thing is obviously a scam!

You'll call later to complain, and...

That's why having a pretty girl rub my shoulders would be best.

And I know exactly what you're gonna say!

In that case, try coming up with anything better than a pretty girl

to treat your stiff shoulders.

How many times do I have to tell you, the "stiff shoulder holder"?!

You know, I know just the right person.

Someone who is always suffering from being tense,

and yet is a sucker for these kinds of mail order products.

What I'm saying is that world peace, you see...

Mm-hmm...

Fukiyose, are you here?!

Huh?

It's our life's wish! Let us massage you, Fukiyose?!

Now then, everyone, next up is our chemistry class.

My relaxed classroom has turned into

a lawless battle arena for delinquents!

It's for the sake of world peace.

All right, starting today,

you will all begin a little rehab therapy of your own.

Is everyone okay with wearing Tokiwadai Middle School's

winter uniform for your street clothes?

"No problem," replies Misaka .

The four of you are the same size.

"We are all identical; you need not even measure us,"

replies Misaka swiftly.

"There has been no time to allow for any difference in sizes,"

adds Misaka .

"Mi..."

"Misaka..."

"Is something the matter, ?" asks Misaka... Huh?

"There is enough room for me to fit two fingers in here!"

reports Misaka immediately.

"But all of us Misakas are supposed to be the same,"

says Misaka , registering her dismay.

"What about her bust, and elsewhere?"

asks Misaka , proposing a thorough physical.

Now, individual differences will arise, due to diet and exercise.

"In other words, without telling the other Misakas,

have you been engaging in what is popularly called a diet?"

says Misaka , continuing the cross-examination.

"Now that you mention it, I have seen

with her nose buried in a weekly women's magazine before,"

Misaka suddenly remembers.

"At that time, she obtained top-secret information

that if one places a ring received from a boy one likes

on the left ring finger, one is a winner,"

says Misaka , seizing the opportunity to spill the beans.

Ring... Winner...

M-Misaka was...

If you all do the same thing that Miss here did,

you can undergo the same change that she did, can't you?

"M-Misaka will follow her crisis management functions and flee!"

says Misaka--

There, there, there you are!

Hmm?

This calls for, yeah, that.

"Just my luck."

What's the big idea, responding like that after seeing me?!

So, did you need something from me, Zapper?

Are you sure you can take that kind of attitude with me right now?

Huh?

The penalty game!

Huh? Oh...

You mean I'm still on the hook for that?

Don't go thinking you can blow it off on your own!

Anyhow, you still have to do anything I tell you.

But then, I know that anything an average Joe like you can do

won't amount to very much. Though as far as that goes,

how about you still give me your best?

Huh?

All right.

Very well! In that case, you may ask anything you wish of me!

Huh?

Milady, let me first provide a comfortable environment.

I, Kamijo Toma, incompetent as I am,

beg you to please forgive my shortcomings!

Hey, you dummy! Stop blowing up my skirt as hard as you can!

Sissy...?

K-Kuroko!

W-What a well-tempered hardball posture of servitude!

This troglodyte is not to be underestimated. However...

That role is supposed to be mine!

Stop that, you idiots! What kind of ritual is this?!

What am I, some kind of cult leader?!

This is the woman who will be looking after you now.

What the hell?

Hey, now, you haven't forgotten my face already, have you?

I don't mean you! What I meant was,

this unexplainable little creature, here!

W-What do you mean, unexplainable?!

Despite how I might look, I am a teacher!

Tch! So the research to control the effects of cell aging

has already been perfected, has it?

U-Um... It isn't like that.

"You poor thing!

Huh?

I'm sure you've been through nothing but experiments,

and haven't had any free time for yourself,"

says Misaka Misaka, softly dabbing her eyes with a handkerchief.

Please, listen to what I'm saying!

Ha-ha! Wow, they've really got your number, huh?

Geez, did you bring them here to get "my number"?!

I'll show you up to my apartment right away.

I'll just go bring the car around.

Are you sure about this?

Letting me crash at your place?

"No problem." I've got an extra room, so it's no--

I don't mean that.

I mean sheltering me like this is like you're asking to take on

the whole damn ugly Academy City underworld.

Which is why I'm doing it.

Have you forgotten my line of work?

I don't think there are many folks who would openly come out

and att*ck the residence of an Antiskill officer.

Don't say I didn't warn you, after you're dead.

It's all right.

Your name could be written on one of those crowds' lists!

And it's my job to revise those lists.

If it's all the same, I'm glad.

It looks like helping you will be a lot simpler than I'd heard.

Do you really mean that?

I mean, won't it? Say whatever you will,

but you're trying to eliminate your landlady's risks.

Which is to say, you're trying your hardest to protect us, right?

Tch, this is why idiots like her are so hard to manage.

"A Certain Magical Index II" Tch, this is why idiots like her are so hard to manage.

"A Certain Magical Index II"

He's late! What is he up to?!

Seventh Mist at exactly :!

If you're even one second late, you know what will happen!

Sheesh.

He's making me look like an idiot, isn't he?

Somen noodles again today.

No way! Why are we having nothing but this lately?!

What is this? Some sort of magic to regulate our insides,

using the culture of cuisine?

We just happen to have been given a lot of it as a present!

Try putting yourself in my shoes,

having to come up with original ideas day after day,

like salad-style, pasta-style, and udon-noodle-style!

Tsuchimikado Maika...

I have to share this joy with somebody!

--Huh? --Huh?

These! These! Maids generally aren't allowed to stand out too much.

But by fussing around with my sleeves and collar,

I can secretly express my individuality.

I am in a very good mood right now,

so if you have anything on your mind, I'd be willing to hear about it.

We'd like to learn some new ways to eat somen noodles!

I thought the salaries of public servants

were supposed to be getting trimmed back.

This building also serves

as a structural engineering field test site,

so part of the rent is paid for by the university.

Ah, I see.

"Amazing! Amazing! There isn't a speck of dust,"

says Misaka Misaka offering her praise while jumping on the sofa!

You had to write another formal apology, huh?

A-Ah-ha... Whatever do you mean?

Huh?

She has a habit of straightening up her room

whenever she has a problem come up.

She does it without thinking of the consequences,

so she often loses her keys and whatnot.

I-Is that any way to talk about someone

who is looking for your next job together with you?

Which means that the kitchen will be the same as always, right?

Hey, now! Kikyo, you eat the food I cook

as if it tastes good enough, don't you?

As long as I don't know how it's made.

"Wow! Why are there so many rice cookers?"

asks Misaka Misaka, counting them all.

A rice cooker is a miracle appliance that can do anything.

He's not coming.

Miss Misaka!

Oh, Miss Uiharu.

Um, I think Miss Shirai will be coming by to pick up some things.

Oh, mm-hmm.

Miss Shirai offloaded her Judgment workload onto me--

I-I mean, she is awfully busy at work,

so I've come in her place.

Oh, you don't say.

I guess that's Tokiwadai Middle School for you.

It's amazing you can learn the violin in class, huh?

You're overblowing things. Do you want to give it a try?

That's it, support the instrument with your collarbone and jaw.

Gently hold the neck with your left hand.

Hold the bow so the strings are perpendicular, and then slowly...

See? Simple, right?

Miss Misaka, it's almost like I'm in a dream!

What's the matter?

U... i... ha... ru!!

What are you wasting time around here for?

Hey, sorry, sorry.

Now, listen,

I'm the one who won the contest with a penalty game at stake!

So why should I have to be kept waiting here for over an hour?!

W-Well, it's nothing too profound...

H-Huh? I'm sure we agreed on :, right?

Were you here thirty minutes before that?

Well then, I am sorry.

I-It's not as though I started waiting exactly an hour ago...

Misaka, did you...

So... that is...

Did you want to make me suffer through this penalty game that badly?

--Eh? --You really are pretty insidious.

Bulls-eye?

Stop being so defiant! You're the one that lost back there!

You're going to do whatever I say, right?!

W-When you say "whatever," within the bounds of possibility...

You. Will. Do. It. Right?

Come with me!

Wait, where?!

I'm telling you to shut up and come with me!

That is the first penalty!

You mean there's not just one?!

"Handy Antenna Campaign"

Handy Antenna service?

Ah, something to replace the antenna base on your cell phone.

Yes. Subscribers can construct their own network with them.

Also, if you sign a pair contract, the calling rate becomes cheaper.

Pair contract?

And, right now, everyone who agrees to a set contract

will receive a Lovely Mitten Gekota strap!

Eh?

Which is why you're signing up with me.

So you're just after the strap, then?

And as far as frogs go, you've already got--

You're. Signing. Up. With. Me.

Yeah, but, pair contracts are what boyfriends and girlfriends

sign up for together, aren't they?

Y-You dummy! What conclusion are you jumping to?!

It says it's limited to male-female,

but i-it doesn't have to be boyfriend-girlfriend, right?!

Like, say, a married couple would be fine, too.

Hello in there.

You've gotten far more serious than boyfriend-girlfriend, Miss Misaka.

Huh? I-It's a penalty game, so don't say anything and come with me!

Now, we'll need a photo to complete the paperwork.

Like a picture ID?

No, something that lets us know you two are a pair.

You can even use your cell phone to take a two-sh*t of both of you.

A two-sh*t?!

How about it? Want to make do with my cell phone camera right off?

Y-Yeah, okay...

Okay, here it goes.

Let me just make sure, here. You told me you wanted this, right?

I-I know I did!

Just you wait, Gekota!

H-Here goes.

Okay! Whenever you're ready!

It looks like you're pulling a face, Misaka.

Why are you looking the other way?

I don't think this is what a pair looks like.

L-Let's try taking it again.

What's with the forced expression again, Misaka?!

Why are you distancing yourself from me?!

Look, for this two-sh*t,

we just have to make it look like we're in love, right?

Come on, do it like this!

Smile, Misaka! This photo is for the paperwork, right?

As long as we think of it in that way, this won't be a problem.

Y-Yeah... Well, you're right.

We're just taking a picture that makes it look that way, aren't we?

Yeah, yeah, we're just taking a picture!

Here goes!

Yes!

Good grief. It was a mistake for me to underestimate him

as just a Johnny-come-lately thrall of yours.

Sissy, you've been going around everywhere splurging with him.

D-Don't go getting the wrong idea!

I just wanted to get a Gekota strap...

...so I needed a photo for a pair contract...

In that case, you need not have lowered yourself to this boy;

if you and I had become a pair, there would not be any problem!

--Now, let us take some pictures. We will just slam them through. --Wait... Hey! Kuroko!

--We will make memories to last a lifetime! --Wait... Hey! Kuroko!

--We will make memories to last a lifetime! --Hey, where are you taking me, Kuroko?!

If everything's okay, then can I go home now?

I told you, it has to be male-female!

Hitotsui Hajime, you are primarily busy with your concerts,

but recently, you announced you would be appearing in a movie.

--Moreover, it's a Hollywood picture, of all things. --I fell asleep, huh?

Did you have anything especially trying happen to you?

Tch, you're letting yourself become sloppy, you idiot.

Even with this thing on, it's all you can do to fight for fifteen minutes.

"Hitotsui Hajime to star in his first Hollywood production!!"

"Hitotsui Hajime to star in his first Hollywood production!!" The direction I got was just right for me, being Japanese.

"Hitotsui Hajime to star in his first Hollywood production!!" Did he not have any pretense?

Did he not have any pretense?

As for the others, did they show a particularly suitable understanding

of me as being a contemporary Japanese man?

The words themselves are spoken in native US English,

so using just gestures, manners, and attitude,

--Nobody's here, huh? --being told to show us that this guy is Japanese was something--

--Oh well, guess I'll grab a shower. --being told to show us that this guy is Japanese was something--

Oh my.

"W-Why are you just barging in here without any advance warning,"

asks Misaka Misaka, reaching for a bath towel after it's too late!

Why didn't you lock the door?

Sorry, sorry. I've lived by myself up to now, and I just forgot.

Aiho, hurry and wrap yourself up in this.

"You two don't care that you've been seen naked, huh?"

says Misaka Misaka, asking a simple question.

Hmm, it's not really anything to make a fuss over, is it?

He's a child, and we're adults.

"I would say more like biddies than adults," says Misaka--

--Ow-w-w-w! Now they're suddenly both giving Misaka's head noogies!

--I'm just saying, be more wary. --Ow-w-w-w! Now they're suddenly both giving Misaka's head noogies!

"And that's what happened,"

says Misaka Misaka, giving an incident report.

"In that case, it has already gone out over the network,

so there is no reason to repeat it all again verbally, is there?"

Misaka rationally points out.

"I want to say it verbally as much as it takes,"

says Misaka Misaka, finding the outrageousness inexcusable!

"And now, being shut out due to the apartment's auto-lock

makes your situation seem even foolish, huh?

If Misaka hadn't been passing by,

you would have been all alone for a long time,"

says Misaka, secretly laughing on the inside.

"It isn't Misaka's fault! It's the auto-lock's!"

says Misaka Misaka in exasperation!

Hmm?

Hey, where did that little brat go?

Now that you mention it...

"You mean this?" asks Misaka, to verify the unexpected question.

"All of the other Misakas have those,

but Misaka is the only one who doesn't,"

says Misaka Misaka, gazing enviously at it.

"That Misaka is that Misaka, while this Misaka is this Misaka."

says Misaka, intimating that you should give up.

"Aww! Misaka wants one, too!"

says Misaka Misaka, using her small appearance to its fullest,

to exercise some spoiled-brat negotiation skills.

"You may be going for endearing antics,

but it's upsetting when used on those of the same sex, and backfires,"

says Misaka, offering a kindly explanation.

"Say, , would you bow for me?"

says Misaka Misaka, asking a favor.

"You fell for it!"

says Misaka Misaka, her mugging plan a success!

"Nyah! If you want them back, try and take them!"

says Misaka Misaka, basking in the afterglow of victory

while making a mad dash!

"The time for revolution has come,"

Misaka hereby declares.

At a certain world's center,

I whispered that it was okay to be alone

I bent back the hands on the clock

and kept my eyes closed

You can't turn back time that has passed

but on that day, you showed me

that that's how it should be

The miracle of you being there as the seasons roll around

makes even the broken clock start up again

Right now, yeah, I may be a helpless piece of junk

but it's funny how I feel like I can change that

All because your voice is still here

for me, even now

"Preview"

"Preview" First Misaka Mikoto, now Misaka's Sister?!

And now there's even a pint-sized Misaka.

Hey, don't go running amok here!

Wait, Index, if you're with them, then...

Next time, "Serial Number."

When science and magic cross paths, the story begins.