05x18 - All These Engagements

[bunniefuu]

We are going to host an
impromptu engagement party.

I don't want Diane taking
over all my wedding planning.

She's completely inflexible.

You can be a little determined
and inflexible yourself.

Why don't we throw the party
at your friend's gastropub?

I'm sure we can zhuzh it up a bit.

As long as you have these
unresolved feelings for Evan,

I can't do this again.

EMILE: Twist. He's got
a girl, and it's not you.

He has no idea that you're into him.

If you want him to, you
better make a move soon.

MARIANA: Did you
borrow some of my Xanax?

No, of course not.

It seems like quite a few are missing.

You okay?

- I'm fine.
- Oh.

Got back on my antidepressants,

and it didn't mix well with the alcohol.

So what's the deal

with this missing girl
that you're looking for?

Why do you keep roping my sister

into these dangerous situations?

I can't control her actions
any more than you can.

MARIANA: Your mom wanted
you to tell us everything

that you know about Madison.

JOAQUIN: Look at this. This
is right after we saw your mom.

Right before she d*ed.

Silas must've been at her
house, waiting for her.

MARIANA: What if Silas is the
reason that your mother d*ed?

Adam.

Think he'll talk to us now?

We'll see.

♪♪

JAMIE: I just want to
say how much I appreciate

that you gave in and let my
mother plan this party with you.

She said it was a real collaboration.

- Did she?
- Mm-hmm.

Okay. Are you thinking
buffet? Passed plates?

What do you prefer?

You know, I think a buffet.

Mmm, but passed plates lend
such elegance to a party.

Makes it feel special.

Okay.

Ideas on music? Uh, a DJ? A band?

A DJ would be nice.

Or... Or what about a swing band?

That would be really
special, don't you think?

Why not?

Okay.

Uh, signature cocktail?

Callie?

You know, I think people
like to order their go-tos.

Uh, sure, but they
also like an experience.

Something special.

Sure.

Yeah.

Yep, a real collaboration.

Now, I know you said
you wanted white lilies,

but I just thought these
bright peonies were so...

Special?

Exactly!

♪ Pa-pa-paa, pa-pa-pa-pa-pa ♪

♪ Pa-pa-paa, pa-pa-pa-pa ♪

♪ Then we'll find our peace of mind ♪

♪ You and me, Bel Ami ♪

♪ Pa-pa-pa, pa-paaa ♪

♪♪

EVAN: Mariana.

You look nice.

Thanks.

I'm headed out

to Callie and Jamie's engagement party.

Ah.

Are you her maid of honor?

I don't know.

I mean, I kind of assume,
but... she hasn't asked me.

So, uh, what are you up to tonight?

Uh, I thought I might try that
new ramen place on 3rd Street.

You don't like ramen.

I don't?

♪♪

Don't tell me that this was your idea.

No. No. None of this was my idea.

Okay, how do you deal with Diane?

I just take the path
of least resistance.

You stood up to her at your wedding.

Yeah, and now Eliza and
I live out of the country.

How is her tour going?
I wish she could be here.

Going good.

- How's Carter doing?
- Finals.

Do you think Jesus and
Emma are ever coming back?

Tell you what, they had better!

Who's with Mariana?

Evan.

I thought Mariana had
something going on with Joaquin.

No, Joaquin is bad news.

- He is?
- CALLIE: Yeah.

What makes you say that?

Well, Joaquin is how she got involved

in all the sh**ting
stuff in the first place.

Mariana's responsible for
her own actions and choices.

Anyway, I think she's torn
between the two of them.

[LOUD SWING MUSIC PLAYING]

♪♪

Hi. Oh, I'm so glad you came.

Hey, I'm just happy to
be invited. Thank you.

- Of course. You look good.
- Thanks.

Mmm. I see Isaac's here.

So what was up with him
at Douro the other night?

Um...

Mariana's been an incredible help to me.

Are you feeling better now?

Yes.

Feel as if I could live to be 100.

Of course, statistically,

there is only 18.9%
chance of that happening.

CALLIE: So... Evan?

I felt bad.

I was all dressed up for your party,

and Evan had nowhere to go.

I hope it's okay that I brought him.

Oh, of course.

But is it going to be
awkward with Joaquin?

Why would it be awkward?

So will there be any other
big announcements tonight?

Like what?

Nothing. [CHUCKLES]

I should bring these over to Evan.

- Hi.
- Hi.

Don't worry, I won't
leave your side all night.

What? You know, you
don't have to babysit me.

I want you to talk to
your friends. Have fun.

Yeah? You sure?

Mm-hmm. Yes. This is our party.

Yeah.

- Love you.
- Love you.

♪ It don't mean a thing if
it ain't got that swing ♪

♪ Do ah do ah do ah do
ah do ah do ah do ah... ♪

I don't need this walker.

Yes, you do.

Here, have a seat.

This is Lena and Stef.

They're Brandon and Callie's mothers.

WOMAN: Ah!

Lena, Stef, this is my mother, Elaine.

She couldn't make it to
Brandon and Eliza's wedding.

Sciatica. I couldn't
handle the plane ride.

But if they'd gotten married at home

like I wanted them to,

I could have seen my only
granddaughter get married.

But this one had other plans.

Okay, Mom. Um, why don't you stay here

and I'll go get you a plate?

If you don't mind.

Oh. No, of course not.

Thanks. Perfect.

You know, I always thought
my Uncle Biff was gay.

But, of course, nobody
came out in those days.

Biff had a drinking problem too.

He was a terrible boozer.

One time we went to a party

for my cousin Charlie
and his wife, Lori.

Well, Charlie and Biff had
this little retail business

back in Duluth,

and, ugh, those winters
were colder than...

EVAN: The first glass of champagne
is said to affect you the most

because it contains the most bubbles,

which release carbon dioxide
gas into the bloodstream,

thus giving you that instant buzz.

MARIANA: Hmm.

I... did not know that.

How do you know so much about
so many different things?

When I was a kid, I
didn't have many friends,

so I used to read my grandfather's
Encyclopedia Britannicas.

I guess that makes me
sound like a huge nerd.

Oh, uh, will you excuse me for a moment?

Of course.

Hey. I'm glad you came.

Yeah. I wasn't sure I should,

seeing as how your sister hates me.

She doesn't hate you.

Brought Evan, huh?

It was a last-minute thing.

He's not, like, my date or anything.

It's none of my business.

I'm gonna go have a drink.

♪♪

[SIGHS] Sorry I'm late.

So many cavities today!
Why don't people floss?

Ah.

This is so romantic.

Oh, I gotta say hi to
the bride-to-be. BRB.

Sumi's gonna get the fever.

- The fever?
- Wedding fever.

The white dress, something blue,

puppies wearing tutus and tuxes.

What weddings are you going to?

I'm just saying, she just moved in,

and now this is gonna
get her all riled up,

and next thing you know,

she's backing me into a proposal.

DOM: You're not doing Isaac any favors

by not confronting him

about taking Mariana's medication.

Yeah, but what if he didn't do it?

We all saw him the other night.

He was definitely on something.

You never confronted Mom.

You even bought her booze.

And that was a mistake,

which you always pointed out.

So why is Isaac any different?

I guess I'm afraid

that if I bring it up, I'll lose him.

Like I lost Mom.

Well, you'll lose him anyway.

To the dr*gs.

Like we lost Mom long before she passed.

So, uh, Callie and Jamie

are kind of an odd couple, right?

[INDISTINCT CONVERSATION]

GAEL: I don't think so.

Even though Callie and I used to date.

You're kidding.

No.

She doesn't seem like your type either.

Really?

Joaquin, hey.

I'm Brandon, Callie's elder brother.

You know Jude?

Yeah. Yeah. Good to meet you.

So you're a journalist?

JUDE: Anything I might've read recently?

- Uh...
- Oh, you're freelance.

- I mean...
- JUDE: That must be difficult,

not having a regular gig.

Are you close to your family?

Family is everything to us.

Well, well, well, who do we have here?

Kelly, this is Riley.

Players gonna play. [LAUGHS]

So nice to meet you.

So... you're a player?

No, no, I have no idea
why she just said that.

Grace was my second
cousin, from Arkansas.

[VOICE FADING] Her father,
Wilford, he worked for the railroad.

His wife, Peggy, had multiple affairs.

[NORMAL VOICE] She was a real slut.

Her family hailed from Kentucky.

I don't know, Louisville, I think.

[MUFFLED VOICE] But
Edward loved the ponies.

Who... Who is Edward again?

Grace's son!

Where is Diane with my plate?

- I will go find out.
- ELAINE: Good.

The woman needs to eat, Lena.

Where was I? Oh, yes. Edward. [CHUCKLES]

Finally get a night off and
this is where you end up.

Which one of us do you have a crush on?

I just came in to say hi.

And say, if you need any help,
you know, just let me know.

I appreciate that, but
we, uh, we have it covered.

Go, have fun.

Hey, I just wanted
to say thank you again

for your advice with Riley
in giving her a chance.

I finally told her everything.

Why didn't you tell me this before?

I was afraid that you'd be turned off.

I like you.

I want you to let me in.

I like you too.

All I ask

is that you be honest with me.

Okay.

So...

do you get a lot of
foot traffic up here?

Hardly any.

Good.

She was totally cool.

That's so great.

Yeah, um, she actually
came with me tonight.

Maybe you two can meet.

Oh! That sounds... awesome.

All right.

I should probably get back to her.

♪♪

Now, Callie, you can't
just stand here all night.

As the bride-to-be,

it's your job to introduce
yourself to all the guests.

Now, here, let me help you.

These are our oldest friends,
Joyce and Dutch Mason.

This is Callie, Jamie's fiancée.

- Well, hello.
- Aren't you lovely?

Thank you. It's lovely to meet you.

Hey, you two look like
you could use a refill.

Let me show you the bar.

[SOFTLY] Now, mingle.

Whatever happened to Heather?

They broke up, unfortunately.

♪♪

Hey.

So have you heard anything from Adam?

No. No.

And let's, uh...

Let's not talk about the case here

since Callie thinks you dropped it

and your brothers just grilled me.

- My brothers?
- Yeah.

MARIANA: Why?

What happened to Elaine's plate?

I got caught up, uh, mingling.

You didn't leave her
alone, did you, Lena?

No. I left her with Brandon.

STEF: Oh, my God, poor Brandon!

You're so mean.

I swear, I think Diane left us
alone with her mother on purpose.

Something you and she have in common.

Mm. Well, that's what
we're supposed to be doing.

Meeting people, right?
As parents of the bride.

- Good point.
- Yep.

Sorry to interrupt.

Hi, I'm Lena, and this is my wife, Stef.

We are the mothers of the bride.

Lovely to meet you both.

I'm Joyce and this is my husband, Dutch.

It's so nice to meet you.

And I'm gonna go track down
some smoked salmon lollipops

before they run out.

But I'll be right back.

So where do you and Trina hail from?

Uh, well, it's... it's... it's Lena.

And, um...

So I did some digging,
and I have some good news.

So you actually had a green card

when you were a kid, in foster care.

Wait. Really?

Uh, does that mean that I...

Even though your green card's expired,

your status hasn't.

We just have to get it renewed.

That's amazing!

CALLIE: Yeah, the only problem is

I still have to track
down your Alien ID number.

So until I do, just be careful.

Don't share your status with anyone,

no matter how much you trust them.

Things can go awry.

People could report you.

I won't.

I promise.

I... Wow, I just... I
can't thank you enough.

Isn't this party wonderful?

- PHOTOGRAPHER: Ladies.
- Oh, yes.

Y... Yeah. [CHUCKLES AWKWARDLY]

Um, Yeah, but, you know,

it must be so stressful
for Callie and Jamie.

Having to be the host and the hostess,

you know, with the mostesses.

And, oy! The cost!

Mmm, totally.

After everything that
happened with Meera,

I never wanna do any of this again.

Oh, I haven't said hi
to Jamie! Be right back.

MARIANA: Hey.

Why did you two interrogate Joaquin?

What did Callie say to you?

Just that you might be
torn between him and Evan.

And that Joaquin's bad news.

He's not bad news.

But... what did you think?

I thought he was a nice guy.

Evan seems nice too.

Ugh, exactly!

Guys, guys, I'm on with Sophia. Say hi.

- Hi.
- Hi.

Oh, my gosh, you're blonde!

I know, I'm blonde, I'm blonde.

Do we like it?

- Love it.
- Absolutely.

Oh, I wish I was there.

I know. I wish you were here too.

[SOFTLY] I could
really use a body double

to help deal with Jamie's mother.

Hey, how's grad school?

Hey.

Has Callie mentioned

who she's gonna ask to
be her maid of honor?

Or best man?

I haven't heard anything.

Do you think she'll ask Sophia?

Since she's her body double
and half-biological sister.

Hm.

I hadn't thought of that.

Me neither.

[TOILET FLUSHING]

I'd ask if you come here often,

but this place just opened.

So, uh, I guess I
need a new pickup line.

A pickup line for...

You. Duh!

Ah. [CHUCKLES]

Um, I am here with Gael.

As his date. I think.

Oh.

Well, he just introduced
you as his studio tenant.

I never know which way the
gay is blowing with him.

Too bad.

Your loss.

[EXHALES]

Hey. Is everything okay?

Um... Well, uh, Callie just hit on me,

so I don't think so.

Callie? What? Are you... Are you sure?

Positive.

♪♪

So Sumi said she doesn't
want to get married.

Well, I can't say I saw that coming.

How do you feel about that?

I always assumed we'd
have a wedding someday.

I'm her Starfish!

I need another drink.

DAVIA: [SOFTLY] Starfish?

Hey, um, is everything okay
between Callie and Jamie?

I mean, they are getting married,

so I would assume so. Why?

Um, Jay just said
that Callie hit on him.

Yeah.

What? I've been looking for this.

How did you get a whole tray?

Well, I bonded with the waiter

after I finally escaped the Masons.

Payback's a bitch.

Ba-ba-ba-bah. These
are not Lena-lollipops.

Why not?

Because payback is a bitch.

Oh, hey.

Not to start rumors or anything,

but did you hear that
Callie was hitting on Jay?

- What?
- Yeah.

Wait. Who's Jay?

Gael's extremely hot date over there.

- Boing.
- Wow.

I think he's making
me a little bisexual.

Don't say anything.

My lips are sealed.

Okay. Don't tell anyone I told you,

but Callie apparently
hit on some guy named Jay.

What?

Look. Not yet.

Now.

[APPLAUSE]

Hi. Um...

I was hoping to request something

maybe a little more contemporary,

just to get the younger people dancing.

Uh, we were actually given
a playlist of approved songs

by Mrs. Hunter.

We're not supposed to
take requests tonight.

Sorry about that.

DIANE: Hi, hi, hi. Hi.

I thought that we should gather
everybody for a sit-down dessert.

I thought that'd be so special.

I mean, if that's what you want.

Why do you even bother
asking what I want?

Because you just turn
it into what you want.

- That's not true.
- No, it is true. It is true.

And it is also true

[SOFTLY] that you wish that
Jamie was marrying Heather.

Because let's face
it, you don't like me.

Oh, no, no, no.

It's clear that you don't like me.

Hey, can I get a sh*t of the lovely
bride-to-be and mother-in-law?

Great. Love it.

Hey, Diane. Great party.

Do you mind if I steal Callie
for a second? Thank you.

Hey, so...

There's a rumor going around
the party that you hit on Jay.

What? Who's Jay?

Hey! How's it going?

Not great, Bob!

Who's Bob?

- So who is Bob?
- It's a meme!

Well, at least you haven't
lost your sense of humor.

I had a fight with your mother.

And FYI, she and I did
not have a collaboration.

It was a no-laboration.

No, everything tonight
is what she wanted.

Which is... It's really... It's fine.

But it would've been really nice

to have you by my side tonight.

Wait, I thought you said...

I know, I told you to go and
hang out with your friends.

And I shouldn't even feel like this.

And I don't... I don't wanna be needy.

Callie...

if there is one thing you will never be,

it's needy.

You are so independent.

And sometimes, it'd be nice if
you needed me a little bit more.

Okay?

And out of all of my friends, you...

are by far my best friend.

Hey, you... you're the one I
wanna hang out with the most.

Okay?

- I love you.
- I love you.

Oh, uh, by the way,

if you hear a rumor

that I was hitting on someone named Jay,

there's zero truth to it, I promise.

- Okay.
- Yeah.

MAN: Hey. You lovebirds.

Time to take center stage.

[BOTH CHUCKLING]

If I can have everyone's attention?

Attention, please.

Thank you all for joining tonight

to celebrate the engagement
of our eldest son, Jamie,

and his beautiful bride-to-be, Callie.

[ALL APPLAUDING]

That's Callie?

Yeah.

Okay, this whole time, I
thought that was Callie.

No! That's Kelly.

Oh.

Oh, but now, everything
makes a lot more sense.

JIM: When Jamie first met Callie

at Brandon and Eliza's engagement party,

I saw a twinkle in my son's eye

that I'd never seen before.

And I thought, "Boy,
is my son in trouble

because this girl is
way out of his league!"

[GUESTS LAUGHING]

But somehow he pulled it off

and got Callie to agree to marry him.

You're a lucky man, son.

And we are thrilled

to welcome another Adams
Foster to our family.

Callie, Jamie, the floor is yours.

[JAMIE CLEARS THROAT]

Yeah, I just want to say,

uh, every word my father said is true.

I'm the luckiest guy in the world.

Thank you.

Uh, yes.

I want to thank all of you for coming.

And a big thank you to Jim and Diane

for hosting this beautiful party for us.

And to my family.

I don't know where Jude
and I would be today

if all of you hadn't adopted us.

I know I wouldn't be standing
here with this amazing man.

Thank you for never giving up on me,

especially all the times

that I gave you plenty of reasons to.

I owe my life to you.

I love you.

[MOUTHING] Love you too.

And to my amazing fiancé,

thank you for making me feel truly loved

and safe to need you.

I love you.

[MOUTHING] I love you.

ELAINE: I have something to say.

[SOFTLY] Oh, boy.

[GASPS] Yes, thank you.

- Oh.
- No. No.

- What?
- No.

You didn't give me any salmon pops

and I'm gonna need both of these

because we're gonna
both be as old as Elaine

by the time the speech is over.

Live. Laugh. Love.

[GUESTS LAUGHING]

- All right.
- Okay. Okay.

- A truce?
- Truce.

[BAND PLAYING "THE
WAY YOU LOOK TONIGHT"]

Oh.

♪ Some day when I'm awfully low ♪

♪ When the world is cold ♪

♪ I will feel a glow
just thinking of you ♪

♪ And the way you look tonight ♪

May I have this dance?

You may.

Do you dance?

I do.

Do I?

Kidding.

I'm willing if you are.

Uh, sure.

♪ Yes, you're lovely ♪

♪ With your smile so warm... ♪

EMILE: Ouch.

Poor Ladle.

Always the sous, never the chef.

♪ And the way you look tonight ♪

Are you okay, Starfish?

I just always thought that
one day we might get married.

Why wouldn't we?

Because you said you didn't
want any of this after Meera.

I said I didn't want this, but...

I never said I didn't
want to get married.

- So you do?
- I do!

- Oh, my God. Did you just propose?
- No.

- No, no, no, no. Not yet.
- Are we engaged?

Keep your voice down.

Someday, though.

Oh. Okay.

♪ Tearin' my fear apart ♪

♪ And the laugh that
wrinkles your nose... ♪

Would you care to dance?

You don't wanna dance with an old woman.

Mmm, I don't see any old woman here.

Ah.

♪ Never, never change ♪

♪ Keep that breathless charm ♪

♪ Won't you please arrange it? ♪

♪ 'Cause I love you ♪

You okay?

I think... I think I should go.

- What?
- No, I just, uh...

[CLEARS THROAT]

Thank you for inviting me.

♪ Just the way you look... ♪

Is your mom gonna be mad?

I don't see why.

- [SONG ENDS]
- [GUESTS APPLAUDING]

[UP-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYING]

ALICE: Bravo!

- ELAINE: Oh.
- Can I walk you to your seat?

No, I want to boogie down.

- ELAINE: Ooh!
- Oh. Okay.

Okay, well, okay. Just
be careful, though.

Oh, my God. Look at my mother!

♪♪

♪ Sing, sing, sing, sing ♪

♪ Everybody start to sing... ♪

Mom. Mom!

What about now?

DIANE: Mom!

CALLIE: Thank you.

DIANE: I wanna clarify
something, Callie.

I do like you.

I'm just scared, I guess, of...

of losing my son.

I mean, sons...

sons tend to gravitate
towards their wives' families.

And it's clear that you're
not a big fan of mine.

So I'm just...

I'm just worried that
your feelings towards me

are going to pull
Jamie even further away.

You raised Jamie to
be such an amazing man.

I... I respect you for that.

And I would never, ever

try to spoil his relationship with you

or take him away.

I promise.

Thank you for saying that.

Oh, and I'm... I'm sorry

I tried to force my opinions on you

about this party. I just...

- Just wanted it to be special.
- Special.

Yeah.

And it is.

Truly.

Thank you.

Is it all right if I
give you a little hug?

Of course. Yes.

Thank you.

What is going on there?

Another truce?

Hey, you're Riley, right?

I'm Ladle.

- "Ladle"?
- Well, Mabel.

Ladle's my nickname.

Oh, cute.

I work here with Luca,

and I just wanted to say

I'm really glad he finally told you

everything about his past.

He was really worried
about how you'd take it,

but I'm glad it all worked out.

Yeah.

Well, I have to get back to the kitchen.

It was great meeting you.

You... too.

So, uh, did you talk to Isaac yet?

Not yet.

I mean, he's in such
a good place tonight.

Are you sure about that?

[SIGHS]

Uh, if I could have everyone's
attention for another moment.

Mariana, could you please
come to the dance floor?

- [JOAQUIN SNORTS]
- Oh.

- You good?
- Mm-hmm.

This is for you.

Oh.

[MARIANA GASPS]

"I can't say I do, without you."

Will you be my maid of honor?

Of course, I will.

[GUESTS APPLAUDING]

Did you guys know about this?

- Of course!
- She's been planning this for months!

- Are you all right?
- Yes.

Well played.

♪♪

♪ Fly me to the moon ♪

♪ And let me play among the stars ♪

♪ Let me see what spring is like ♪

♪ On Jupiter and Mars ♪

♪ In other words ♪

♪ Hold my hand ♪

♪ Mmm, in other words ♪

♪ Darling, kiss me ♪

♪ Fill my heart with song ♪

♪ And let me sing for ever more ♪

♪ You are all I long for... ♪

[BOTH SNORING]

♪ In other words ♪

♪ Please be true... ♪

[CHUCKLES] I was... I was so tired,

I almost fell asleep at that party.

I need to ask you something.

Uh-huh?

Are you really back on
your antidepressants?

I told you I was.

Can I see the prescription bottle?

You don't believe me?

No.

I don't believe you're taking them.

Did you take Mariana's Xanax?

- Malika...
- MALIKA: [LOUDLY] Did you?

That's some bullshit.

I don't want you to go. But if
you leave, you can't come back.

'Cause I will not enable you.

I didn't ask to live here.

Remember?

♪♪

[SIGHS]

Hey. I just heard from Adam.

He wants to talk to us.

[TENSE MUSIC PLAYING]

I think Silas had something
to do with my mother's death.

Maybe he gave her something

or scared her so much,
she had a heart att*ck.

Whatever he did,

I'm done protecting him
and I'm ready to talk.

I'm ready to tell you

where Madison's body is buried.

♪♪