03x06 - Talking Turkey

[bunniefuu]

♪ One fine day with a woof and a purr ♪

♪ A baby was born and it caused a little stir ♪

♪ No blue bug and no three-eyed frog ♪

♪ Just a feline, canine, little catdog ♪

♪ Catdog... Catdog... ♪

♪ Alone in the world was a little catdog ♪

♪ Out on the road or back in town ♪

♪ All kind of critters putting catdog down ♪

♪ Got to rise above it, got to try to get along ♪

♪ Got to walk together, got to sing this song ♪

♪ Catdog... Catdog... ♪

♪ Alone in the world was a little catdog ♪

♪ Catdog... Catdog... ♪

♪ Alone in the world was a little catdog. ♪





Dog: uh-huh... Bones... Trash...

Garbage...

Moldy meat...

Winslow...

Dunglap... Mervis...

And my bestest buddy in the world, cat.

Ah, my thanksgiving list of things to be thankful for is done.

Why do you do that silly list every year?

We all know thanksgiving is about one thing and one thing only.

Doing good deeds for our fellow nearburgians?

Turkey... Food of foods.

Feast of kings.

Nothing equals a sweet, succulent, juicy, tasty

Delicious bite of turkey melting in your mouth!

Yeah, yeah, sure, turkey's great

But today's the day for bringing a smile to some lonely children.

Let's go to the orphanage.

Believe me, dog.

Nothing makes orphans happier than me eating turkey.

And that scrumptious bird should be arriving right about...

[ Doorbell rings]

Now!

Happy thanksgiving from the house of meat and poultry.

Hey, sunshine, where's our turkey?

No turkey for you.

Guh...

What?!

I, I ordered it two weeks ago.

I gave you a check.

Your check bounced.

[ Boinging...]

Happy thanksgiving.

No...

Well, this looks a perfect time

To visit that orphanage, hee-hee.

[ Whimpering]

No turkey... No turkey!

We can't have thanksgiving without a turkey!

Cat, it doesn't matter what you eat

As long as you're with your friends.

Winslow, mervis and dunglap

Wouldn't mind if we chow down

On something besides turkey.

Who cares about them?!

Are you mad?

It's against the law, it's...

It's unnearburgian!

[ Sobbing]

Turkey, turkey, turkey!

Come on, lube, it's turkey time already.

Duh, this will be the bestest thanksgiving ever.

Ta-da! Duh...

What the heck is this?!

It, uh, it's turkey.

See, there's istanbul and stuffingburg.

Lube, you knucklehead!

You roasted a map of turkey for thanksgiving?

Duh, should I have boileded it, it?

[ Both growling]

Well, at least we can still watch the thanksgiving parade.

It's the nearburg thanksgiving parade, and I love it!

[ Crowd cheering]

[ Gobbling]

Balloons, bands, and because you asked for them... Mimes!

And here's everyone's favorite action hero...

Mean bob!

[ Kids crying]

And here's today's most important feathered friend

On a fantastic float.

And there's beloved mayor rancid rabbit.

Greetings, ordinary townspeople.

Hope you had a happy thanksgiving.

I know I will, because after the parade

I get to eat this beautiful bird.

[ Gulps]

[ Whimpering]

Gee, that turkey's

Not going to have a very nice thanksgiving.

[ Sighs] join the club.

[ Whimpering]

[ Gasps]

[ Whimpering]

[ Gasps]

[ Screams]

Speed this jalopy up!

This bird and I got a date

At the dining room table.

[ Gasps]

[ Tires squealing...]

[ Whimpers, gasps]

[ Gobbling]

What, what, what?!

Help, my dinner is fleeing

Northbound on state street!

[ Grunts]

Tell my wife I loved her...!

Look, over there!

[ Sirens wailing...]

[ Panting]

[ Grunts]

La, la, la... Cat, you want a peanut butter and jelly sandwich?

[ Hissing]

Never mind.

[ Door slams]

Hey, cat.

You burn the turkey yet? Heh-heh-heh-heh.

There is no turkey, winslow... Heh-heh-heh-heh.

No turkey on thanksgiving?

That's a crime against nature!

What do you say to a peanut butter sandwich?

I say baloney!

I'd rather starve!

Oh, it isn't fair.

All I want is a turkey!

I want a big, beautiful, delicious turkey!

And I want it right now!

[ Doorbell rings]

Hi, mr. Door-to-door salesman man.

Ooh... Hello!

Hello, gentlemen.

My name is walt.

Uh, could I interest you in...

Come on in.

[ Chuckles]

[ Chuckling]

Uh...

[ Sirens wailing...]

Guh...

Will you be dinner... Uh, staying for dinner?

Sure.

Yeah...

So, what are you selling?

Um, uh, uh... Mime lessons.

Okay, let's see... Tea cakes, tuna casseroles... Turkey!

Preheat oven to ...

Put walt in, cook walt... Eat walt!

[ Squeaking...]

Look, cat, help...

I am trapped in a glass box.

That's great.

Say, walt, would you mind

Stepping on this?

Heee...

[ Sneezes]

Did you see that thanksgiving parade on tv?

What, is it thanksgiving?

Feels like I just took off my halloween costume.

[ Laughing]

Walt: let's all laugh together.

[ Laughing]

Come on, laugh with me.

[ Both laughing]

[ Slurping]

[ Laughing, gobbling]

Ooh...

I think walt is a t-u-r-k-e-e.

Yes, isn't it d-e-licious?

Yes, I admit it, I'm a turkey, in the flesh... [ Gobbling]

And such sweet, tasty flesh.

Don't worry, we'll protect you.

We won't let that mean old bunny rabbit eat you.

I promise, we won't let that rabbiteat you.

[ Chuckling]

Let's go to the kitchen where it's warmer.

[ Chuckling]

Oh, you don't know what it's like to be a turkey.

I don't deserve to die!

You got to hide me!

Oh, I will, walt.

How about in here?

[ Gasping and whimpering]

No!

You can hide in here.

[ Grunting]

Is the fourth of july barbecue over yet?

Oops, sorry, forgot about him.

Coast is clear.

It's thanksgiving.

Good luck, turkey.

[ Oinking]

If you could just hide me tonight

I could sneak out tomorrow, and maybe then I could

Get to turkeyburg.

Both: turkeyburg?

Oh, it's the most wonderful place

Where turkeys run wild and free.

No one hurts us, no one hates us, no one wants to eat us.

Turkeyburg.[ Sighs]

[ Gobbling and laughing]

[ Sighing]

[ Cat chuckling...]

My mommy told me about turkeyburg a long time ago.

She tried to go there, but, but...

She never made it.

[ Weeping]

Oh, did somebody gobble her up?

No, it's just a very hard town to find.

Oh, we'll take care of you...

Right, cat?

Cat?

Oh, yeah...

We'll take care of you, all right.

[ Screaming...]

[ Chuckling...]

[ Screaming]

Cat, you can't whack walt!

Cat, cat... It's rude to eat a guest.

Hold it, hold it.

You don't want to eat me.

I taste horrible.

You look delicious to me!

Looks can be deceiving.

I'm a very bitter turkey.

[ Grunting]

[ Gobbling...]

Balloon handler: hey!

[ Cat growling]

[ Gobbling]

Cat... You didn't ask me.

You're not fooling anyone.

Now get back down here.

Cat, he is our fuh-riend.

He is not our fuh-riend.

He is our duh-inner.

Dog: he is my fuh-riend, and fuh-riends

Don't let fuh-riends eat fuh-riends.

Yeah, listen to the duh-og!

[ All yelling]

Whoa!

[ Snarling]

I got a wife and six kids.

They need a daddy.

Cat, there comes a time in a cat's life

When he has to choose between right and wrong.

The only choice I'm making is white meat or dark meat.

Okay, I give up. That's it.

[ Crying]: go ahead, do it.

You don't understand.

You don't know what it's like

To be chased...

To always be on the run....

To have to hide...

To live in fear!

So go ahead, do what you got to do!

You ain't got no idea

What it's like to be me.

[ Grunting]

[ Gasps]

Oh...

I... I... I can't do it!

I do know what it's like to be you.

Now, granted, no one wants to eat us

But we got some people who love to chase us and pound us!

Oh, walt, buddies, pals, friends...

Hi-ho turkety!

Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!

Okay, okay, stop giving me thanks!

Cat... It is thanksgiving, hmm, hmm?

Dog: it's mervis and dunglap!

Go put on a disguise before they eat you!

But what should I wear?

I destroyed my mime outfit.

Hmm...

What do you think?

Louis xiv or dracula?

I look fat in a cape.

I'll go with louis.

Uh, hiya, catdog.

Let's eat.

Oh... This is our new friend, w... Walt

The th.

Enchante.

Slight, uh, change of plans.

Uh, instead of turkey, um...

We're having, um... Peanut butter and jelly.

Both: for thanksgiving?!

It's the latest, hippest trend.

That's all they eat in snobburg and we're-better-than-you-burg.

Okay with me.

Mervy, you game?

Bring on the p.b. And j.

Whew, boy, that was close, huh?

Ta-da.

Cliff: hey, catdog!

We're here for some thanksgiving turkey!

Give it up or I'll pound the stuffing out of you!

Uh, when to we hunt, duh, for the eggies?

[ Whimpering]

Hey, who's mr. Fancy pants?

Uh, this is our new friend walt...

The th.

[ Whimpering]

Enchanted...

Shriek: where's the grub?

Let's eat!

Turkey, turkey, turkey!

Greasers: we want to eat!

Uh, turkey's not quite ready.

I thought you said we were having peanut...

Mervis... [ Chuckling] I was joking.

Of course we're having turkey, gobble, gobble... Gobble.

If it ain't ready, I'm pulling your drumsticks off!

I know... How about we all sing some of our favorite thanksgiving songs?

I never heard of no thanksgiving song.

Sure you have-- here's one now.

One, two, three, four...

Sing along if you know it.

♪ Uh, thanksgiving's the time for cranberries ♪

♪ Uh, pilgrims and stuffing and cranberries ♪

♪ They're red, juicy, very sour cranberries ♪

♪ Make thanksgiving what it is today... ♪

What about the turkey?

♪ Yeah, but what about the gravy? ♪

♪ Yeah, it's thick, brown, lumpy, bumpy gravy ♪

♪ It's better than what they served you in the navy ♪

♪ And, uh, did I mention that I love cranberries, the berries of cran? ♪

I love turkey!

♪ Yes, but what about the cranberries ♪

♪ And things that rhyme with cranberry? ♪

Help me out, dog, something about cranberries.

♪ Oh, turkey... No! Turkey... Dog! ♪

♪ Don't forget the yummy, yummy turkey ♪

♪ Turkey, turkey, tur... Key. ♪

Cat: dog!

Enough with the singing!

Turkey, now!

Um, let me check on it.

What are we going to do?

I got an idea, but I need ten minutes.

Cliff: turkey, now!

Um, almost ready.

Say, how about a game?

Charades, bridge, post office?

How about football?!

Oh...

Now, that's a solid idea.

Football-- the greasers against youse!

[ Siren wailing...]

What, what, what...

Where's that darn turkey?

Hey, maybe he's hiding in someone's house.

Say, disguised as louis xiv.

I'm going to share something with you.

If it weren't so hard to fire civil servants, you'd be gone!

Faster, flatfoot, I'm starving over here.

I'm a football, I'm a football!

Go ahead, kick me, kick me!

Yee-ha!

Have you talked to my wife yet?

I got it, I got it?

[ Greasers huffing and grunting]

Go, mervy, baby!

Yeah, yeah!

[ Snap]

I threw out my hamstring!

Oh, the agony!

[ Laughing]

The ham blew out his hammy!

Hey, wally, get out here and suit up!

I can't play football.

Besides, dinner is almost ready.

[ Sniffing]

Oh, yeah, I can smell the turkey from here.

[ Gobbling, gulping]

[ Siren wailing]

Any of you mugs seen this turkey?

There's a big reward.

Dog: no turkeys here, yours honor.

Just playing some football.

Football, eh?

Hmm, I used to have a pretty good arm. Catch!

Oh...

Oh... Ooh!

Uh-oh.

[ All gasp]

Duh, that looks like the thing we're supposed to eat.

Both: run!

Come on, dog, come on!

[ Others yelling...]

[ Panting and gasping...]

Oh, man.

Sorry I wrecked your thanksgiving.

Ah, we'll have others.

[ Gulps] I hope.

Look, I don't want to get you guys in trouble.

I'm going to turn myself in.

But you can't give up now.

But everybody's looking for me.

[ Footsteps approaching]

Here, turkey.

Here, main course.

Shh...

Wait!

I think I'm about to be brilliant!

Cat: I'm glad we took that "how to make disguises out of trash" class. Ooh...

I knew it would come in handy.

Now the cops will chase us, thinking we're you

And then you can escape!

I don't know how to thank you, catdog.

Send us a postcard from turkeyburg.

You got it.

I'm sure glad I found friends like you.

Thanks for the great thanksgiving.

Aloha!

Ha!

Gobble, gobble! I'm just

A poor turkey who has lost his way.

Gobble, gibble!

Gobble, gobble!

There he is! Get him!

[ Gobbling and yelling...]

Gobble, gobble!

[ Gobbling and grunting]

Dog, you were right.

There is a lot more to thanksgiving than turkey.

And I've got to admit, after helping out walt

I feel hungry for stuffing.

Mommy!

Walter!

Winslow: heh-heh.

It's chow time!

Cliff: okay, blue boy.

Let's take a look at this turkey.

I don't believe it!

Looks like catdog cooked a swell bird!

Ee... [ Spits]

It's a peanut butter and jelly turkey!

This will be our thankiest thanksgiving ever.

Shh...

Happy thanksgiving!

All: hmm...

Guh...

Well, cat, how is your thanksgiving list coming?

Well, I'm down to one thing to be thankful for.

They're starting to carve on your end.

Dog: gulp.

Balloon handler: tell my wife to have a happy thanksgiving!

♪ One fine day with a woof and a purr ♪

♪ A baby was born and it caused a little stir ♪

♪ No blue bug and no three-eyed frog ♪

♪ Just a feline, canine, little catdog ♪

♪ Catdog... Catdog... ♪

♪ Alone in the world was a little catdog ♪

♪ Out on the road or back in town ♪

♪ All kind of critters putting catdog down ♪

♪ Got to rise above it, got to try to get along ♪

♪ Got to walk together, got to sing this song ♪

♪ Catdog... Catdog... ♪

♪ Alone in the world was a little catdog... ♪

♪ Alone in the world was a little catdog. ♪