make if a pizza could make music what
kind of music would a pizza play if a
pizza played a song
would it plank would it trip like a
magic feet
[Music]
flying like a chinese
[Music]
nothing pizza music
pizza i'll hear the charlie horse music
people play
nothing pizza music
what kind of music would a pizza maker
absolutely nothing pizza charlie or
music pizza
all right all right here's one who said
one if by land tourist by sea when it by
land
two is by sea the little mermaid no no
one is violent the ninja turtles
no you sure you're amphibious i'm
thinking of a guy who took a midnight
ride
santa claus the answer is paul revere
oh revere what was it i wasn't that the
guy who had a rock
group in the 60s stop horsing around i
can't help myself
my brain needs a rest listen can we go
play volleyball now
we've got to study our history
if you don't pass tomorrow's test you
are history
come on up come on up thank you atta boy
hey i uh overheard that the category was
history so here's one for you he's a
good ball player
he sometimes wears a blue visor but he
hasn't studied for his history test
who is charlie horse sting that's right
who is this guy
all right here's another one for you
he's handsome he's intelligent
he hosts one of the most popular tv
shows on the air
and he's beloved by millions who is
pat sajak ah wrong
who is alex trebek keep the heck out of
me
you goofball this is alex trebek
oh mr trebek may i call you alex
sure i watch your show all the time
every day
i never miss your show never never never
well you know if you spent more time
studying instead of watching so much
television
then you wouldn't have this problem yeah
well remember that when your ratings
take a nosedive
but i'm not the one with the test
tomorrow oh that stuff is so hard to
remember
well wait a minute you have trouble
remembering dates yeah do you have
trouble remembering
people no well what's your problem i
can't remember which dates go with which
people
oh i see well why don't you try rhyming
uh what are you talking about let me
give you an example yes in 1492
columbus sailed the ocean blue wait a
second i could do that
in 1860 history says
abraham lincoln became our prez you got
it that's good
oh oh that's great yeah all right thanks
guys
charlie good luck with your history test
tomorrow oh thank you see you guys
bye-bye oh thank you mr trebek
i face history without much glee
so i know you find it pleasant studying
ancient kings and things for facts that
i might use
i'd rather know we got a test oh
please give it a rest tell me what
do you know about washington i know that
his name was
george and his face is on the one dollar
that's money in the bank but charlie he
was the president
the very
[Music]
later by a blinking you know that you
just forgot sure
my memories shocked but
thanks a lot uh
trying to tell me what i need i promise
i'll study
yes indeed and you can count
on that i'll take myself in town
i'll learn what i gotta know but right
now i gotta
go and feed the cat
[Music]
where are you going i am
so tired of reliving the past
well if you flunk tomorrow's test you'll
be reliving the fourth
grade so let's get to work yeah well
i won't go swimming i won't play ball i
won't do
anything at all so you're gonna go study
ah i think i'll take a nap
hi boy oh hiya mrs fuentes
so are we ready yeah ready like freddy
oh yeah we're ready oh
boy are we ready ready for what
to study people i must hang my head
something awful when i fell
did you say to study my mom's here to
study american history with us
this is fuentes we have to
but you yes tardy horse i have to study
as well
because in three days i have to do my
videos and she says to become an
american
an american i'm an american and i don't
have to take a test
how come because you were born in
america
yeah like chris and his father so you
citizens by birth
but i am not i don't understand why not
because i was born in mexico
yeah and when i married his father i
moved here
so i am what is called a resident alien
you're alien you're a resident alien
i'm not come on get out i don't believe
in ufos
no no no no a resident elliott you don't
have to tell me
i watched the x-files mom we're really
excited about you becoming a citizen
oh yeah oh yeah we really are
congratulations that's terrific no no no
no so
fast first i have to pass my test oh
well i'll clear out so you two kids can
get on with your studying
adios don't go mom's only here because
the american history we're studying
could be on her test too you mean
you mean you came here to study with us
of course why do you think i was here
well i was hoping he came to play
volleyball we could do somebody tall
oh i'm so sorry i didn't mean to hit you
with my trash
oh for you it's trash for me it's
that oh i lunch if your garbage doesn't
get any better i'm moving to beverly
hills oh well don't let me stop you
for shame sherry i hope you don't talk
to the rest of your family like that
you are not family i couldn't tell if i
was
you'd let me eat inside at a table like
a regular poison
you're not a regular person so who's a
regular poison
you got charlie horse lamb chop hush
puppy this isn't a restaurant it's a
petting zoo a petting zoo
wait oh no no come come come come come
come come and where do you think you're
going that depends on what on who's
asking i'm asking where are you going
charlie horse
can i get back to you on that no you can
get back to your studying
you have a history test tomorrow yeah
well i i'm on a study break
a steady break yeah union rules oh come
on there's no studies
union well then hold up i've been paying
all those dues to
charlie you can't leave your friend
chris all alone to study he's not alone
what he's with his mother his mother
yeah she's taking a history test
tomorrow till
oh that's right he told me his mother's
gonna become a citizen yeah boy
is that a reason to celebrate yeah yep
and i think i'll celebrate
with a game of volleyball no no think
again
but you know we really ought to
celebrate we ought to throw her a party
when she passes her test and go on
do you study no go on dear all right
party's a good idea you know i think we
ought to throw a
a mexican style party it's a fiesta
that's what it is it's a fiesta of
course you're invited
oh sure bring a friend i'll check my
calendar to see if i'm available
oh holy
mackerel this is an album of guests wait
a minute questions
no no no i'm not gonna cook nothing i
can't pronounce
i don't because you want me to cook
soap no soup oh soup
ah but why are you making soup for a
party i mean a very special soup for a
very special party i don't understand
what is so special
about what about the party or the soup
either way
well this party is so celebrated that i
have
passed my citizenship guest and all
that's left
is the official ceremony so in other
words you are now
officially a part of the usa
oh police
[Music]
if americans had come only from england
germany spain or france
could we be the country that we know
not a chance not a chance
[Music]
we wouldn't be what we are today
this great united states of ames
a place where every immigrant group got
stirred up in the butt giving us what we
thought
an international soup
a group soup is like a bondiga
soup that's a soup from where i come
from
[Music]
it's a blend of many things all
collected
together they make a taste completely
unexpected
our bon digestus got their parsnips out
of the garden
through the vegas and potatoes what
better thing could you eat
you toss some meatballs in the potatoes
throw in some carrots and onions
and heat
spanish is good in albanian
soup be sure to make enough
enough to be the truth
[Music]
like people learning from one another
changing what they are
how they could get along while remaining
what they are and not giving up their
identity but becoming something more
that's
nice there that's america that's america
that's a bonding soup
[Music]
so
i don't mind if i do oh
oh it's so delicious but but what has
soup got to do with becoming an american
citizen pray tell
america is like this soup lots of
different people
from lots of different places come here
we don't lose our individual favor but
together
combination of all the groups of
different people make something new
and wonderful i get it a group soup
exactly sacramento wow
hasta lasagna don't get any on you
that's how bundy got soup
some mother dude embarrassing me as
usual
i am dancing what do you think i'm doing
sometimes it's hard to tell
oh yeah right it sounds like something
you do in the kitchen chop the naked
it's an old mexican folk song well does
that mean that only old mexicans can
sing it
no no we sing it whenever there's a
party you see
i'm just getting in the mood for the
fiesta
oh no oh no no no no say it isn't so
what you're gonna do that in public
oh i love the walls a one two three one
two three
four five six seven eight nine ten
eleven twelve
no no no a waltz only has
three pieces only three oh nice you want
more beats we got a lot of dimly red
things in the kitchen
no i'm not talking about beets that are
vegetables
what are they fruits no fruits fruits
i'm talking about musical votes musical
beets
and fruits thank you very much takeout
all right now orange
orange what's your mother making fruit
salad i think
grape grape great great great grape
great great thank you and thank you
thank you ah my friends would you please
look at this
name what you see are you ready
orange green
all right does anybody see a pattern
here yeah you got an orange and two
grapes
then another orange and two more grapes
and you got them in sector three
outstanding all right now my question is
which is the biggest no don't tell me
don't tell me
um i don't think the grace is the
biggest because i could eat that in just
one bite or two if i were hungry
but the orange can i eat that in one
bite
i think i'd better stick to jesus yes
so which one is the biggest well by the
scientific princess of extermination i
have come to the confusion
that the orange is the biggest
you're proud of me now since the orange
is the biggest and i've already proven
that
yes say it the loudest
will you me orange
you've got the rhythm of the wolf the
rhythm of the walls comes in sets of
three beats
and the strongest b*at is the first b*at
orange grape grape
[Music]
in your ear and it's one two three
you're
saying one two three or bust
one two three you must one two three
and count along never lose the b*at
try it move your feet to the rhythm
of the song one two three one two three
it's the beginning
one two three one two three now try and
spinning
dance dance while the music plays on
and on and on and on
from now on should they ask you
can you dance you can answer
yes i can watch me one two three
can't you see i can walls
[Music]
[Applause]
one two three stand still and now
[Music]
one two three now you know
[Music]
i am so excited
a mexican sister
i love a fiesta i always wanted to have
a fiesta really oh yeah lamb chop was
allergic
so we got a cat instead hush for me but
i have grown to love the cat now that
we're gonna have a cat
and a fiesta i hope they get along
hush puppy you don't understand what
we're having a fiesta
not a chihuahua yesterday's like a
mexican celebration right
it's not a dog oh yeah we're giving a
party here mexican style
oh good in that case i'll bring the cat
okay come on sweetheart okay
[Music]
excuse me can you help me and how may i
help you oh thank you
i'm having a fiesta all by yourself or
can anyone join in
no my fiesta is going to be a very large
party
with a lot of latin american music and
so i need some
latin american rhythm instruments hmm
will that be cash check or credit card
i haven't even looked at the instruments
yet picky picky pick
uh what i need is a a pair of maracas
a set of claves and a weiro
all right now here are your claves
[Music]
i love it thank you thank you you're
weirdo
isn't that interesting thank you and
i also sing yes i don't doubt it uh now
uh lounge up do you want to try the
maracas
no i want to play this banging thing
banging thing no no darling charlie
horse wants to play the drums
no no this is like um
sticks sweetheart the sticks are clavis
and hush puppy has said he wants the
clevis
no this looks like railroad tracks what
can she be talking about
rancho oh how sweet that's a xylophone
she'll never learn to play that i beg to
differ with you sweetheart if you will
practice
this afternoon this evening at the
fiesta you can play the xylophone
i pledge allegiance to the flag
of the united states of america to the
republic
for which it stands one nation
under god indivisible with liberty and
justice for all congratulations
you are now american citizens
american citizen too oh you are an
american citizen remember
you were born in the united states yeah
yeah
no one's mighty
jelly showing emergency emergency
really really sort of enjoyed it well
then couldn't wait until a little later
please
please i'm trying to get ready for the
fiesta you know that's the emergency
what i'm not going
to the fiesta why not because
i don't have anything to wear
nothing to wear you have so many clothes
so i got an easter bonnet and i got a
hanukkah dress and i have my snowsuit
and a halloween costume but i have
nothing
nada to add to a siesta
well what do you want me to do let's go
to the mall
better still let's go to the wall
there we go
it is a little big a little bit i could
live in there
oh no don't take it away why i always
wanted my own apartment oh that's your
apartment
yeah see it's got a balcony all around
it how come this hat is so
big this is a sombrero a sunlight
in mexico a sombrero is more than just
something you wear on your head
they're right on their feet no no not on
their feet but they do dance with it
hey dan uh-huh the mexican hat dance
i i never saw a hat dance lampshaw no no
leave me
ha dance come on dance
i think it's smoking though you've seen
both the dork and the contents
and you've witnessed a mouse and a red
dance if you've not seen a mexican night
dance you see nothing exciting at all
some kids i've seen who are fat dance
some guys who have better flat dance but
if you've not seen a mexican hat dance
you've seen nothing exciting at all
i've heard that a ball made a back dance
i've been told that a fly made a nap
dance
in mexico i saw a hat dance like nothing
else i can recall
fernando and paco impact dance and
oldest and curtis and not dad
but when you see a mexican hot dance you
will stop and you'll stare i'll usually
compare that amazing sombrero to
frederick estero i tell you all this in
advance
of the day that you see a thing that
can't be in italy sweet north grand
though it's always in order just south
of our border the mexican
[Music]
hey congratulations honey horse
i never could pass a test without your
help wait no no
no my charlie was my job helped you to
pass the test yes
wow i wasn't stopped by one question
yeah and i remember around
the charlie horse told me it was uh
patrick henry
took a deep breath and said give me
liberty or give me death oh
good one charlie yeah work for me
charlie horse
got an a on his history test oh
congratulations go see that is
this that is congratulations oh yeah
like she said
you want to hear the uh rhyme that uh
saved me
saved you yeah during the test what is
it the roses are nice
and violets are good and george
washington's false teeth are made of
wood
come on she's gonna break the pinata oh
oh boy
okay good luck miranda
no yes yes yes
it will work
i just want to thank you for your help
with all those remembering
rhymes but you get an idea like that oh
gosh sherry who can remember
yeah well i gotta tell you you not only
help charlie horse
pass his history test but you helped my
friend miranda
pass her citizenship test really really
oh your rhyming trick was just the best
charlie and miranda passed the test
hey good one well maybe on jeopardy
sometime
we'll do all of our questions in rhyme
terrific alex that sounds great but i
gotta go now i gotta d*ck
me too and i can't be late cause wheel
of fortune's on at eight
five
[Music]
you
[Music]
[Music]
you can't but we
could still be friends
i hope that we'll still be friends
i know that we'll still be friends
we will still be
friends