01x11 - Daydreaming/Gym

[bunniefuu]

Ned: in a middle school full of bullies...

Insane teachers...

And gross school lunches...

Ned bigby--that's me-- and my two best friends

Try to do the impossible:

Create a guide that will help you survive school.

Man: ♪ joining up

♪ Looking out

♪ I'll survive, ain't no doubt ♪

♪ Never fear

♪ Bring it on

♪ Breaking down what's in my way ♪

♪ Hanging out

♪ Finding my place in this world ♪

♪ Hanging out...

Ned: "ned's declassified school survival guide."

Your results may vary.



What are you doing?

Stop it! Stop!

This is not funny.

You gonna cry?i'm not gonna cry.

Just give me--ned: loomer.

Give her back her backpack. Back.

Get him.

[Girlish scream]

My hero!

Heroes...

I helped too, you know.

Mr. Bigby.ah!

Stop daydreaming or you can kiss

[Smooches] your grade good-bye.

We've all heard it from our teachers:

"Stop daydreaming and pay attention!"

But if you're a daydreamer like me,

Learn from my mistake and don't be too obvious.

You're sure to get busted.

And teachers hate the staring- out-the-window daydream.

Way too obvious.

Eyes front, miss crabgrass.

Try your best to stare at an educational item

In the front of the class.

That way you can cover yourself if you get nailed.

Still daydreaming, mr. Coconut head?

I-i was just thinking about

How you made this class so science-y.

Oh, uh..

Yes. Thank you.

[Bell rings]

Lunch time, whoa!

Not so fast.

Since most of you wasted my class-time daydreaming,

I can waste some of your lunch time

With a science word puzzler. Whoo!

But it's pizza day!

And you can all go get your pizza

As soon as somebody in this class

Tells me why these words are together.

Water, wolf, and trapdoor.

They're together because you wrote them that way.

Class: yeah!

Wrong.class: aw!

It's your list for santa.

Class: yeah!

You're not even close.

But I'll give you all a hint.

The answer is in this room.

This is a chance for one of you to be a hero.

So don't waste your time daydreaming.

[Echoing] daydreaming, daydreaming.

Both: man, what a cool car!

Agent bigby, agent mosely,

You know your mission.

The evil dr. Sweeney is holding the science class hostage

With a goofy word puzzler.

And only you can save them,

So they can get some pizza.

Got it.got it.

Can I drive?

No.

[Engine turns over]

Cookie: agent bigby, look to wrist.

I'm a cool watch, too.

Because...

Beats me. It's your daydream.

[Mr. Sweeney laughing]

[Students clamoring]

So, agent bigby

Thinks he can defeat me!

Well, we'll see if he can defeat

The deadly evil ninjas of death.

[Evil laughter]

[Cackling]

We've got trouble.

I'm on it.

Now can I drive?

Oh!

Mr. Sweeney: no!

Why didn't I hire the waterproof deadly ninjas of death?

Still, agent bigby will never free the class.

Aah!

Mr. Bigby, you'll never free the class for lunch by daydreaming.

Give us another hint. We're hungry.

They're gonna run out of pizza.

All right, fine.

The answer is in this room

And it spins.

It spins.

A tornado? A top?

My head after one of your lectures?

No, no, and cute.

It's the earth. It spins, has water,

Wolfs, and trapdoors.

[Class cheering]

No!class: oh!

But nice try.

Spin, it spins.

Solve it, bigby, or we'll be eating you for lunch.

Really? 'Cause I was kind of counting on the pizza.

No, not really.

Ok.it spins.

Spins...

It spins.

I'm driving a car!

[Beeping]

Ned, the evil science room is coming up on your left.

Ned, help! We're trapped and hungry.

And we want pizza.

It's locked.

[Watch beeping]

Cookie, hack into the school system's

Internal automated door system and open that door.

No problem.

I'm in. And that door will be open

In , , !

[Buzzing]

That didn't go as planned.

What are we going to do now?

Wish there was a way into that room.

Hey, wanda, I've got an idea.

How about we help out secret agent ned?

Jennifer: the fairly oddparents?

Hey, it's my daydream.

Now, let's go over some of cosmo's wish suggestions.

There's snocones, poof into sweeney's evil science room

So you can rescue the class so they get some pizza.

Or snocones.

Let's go with poof into the evil science room.

One little school daydream wish coming up.

Personally, I would have wished for the answer to the riddle.

That wasn't one of the options.

Oh, those were just the only guides I brought.

You could have wished for anything, secret agent ned.

Good luck, agent ned!

Yeah, you're going to need it.

Well, agent bigby, you've come very far.

But you'll never set the class free

Unless you can answer the science puzzler puzzly word game.

Ha ha ha!

Ned, help!

Ned, help. Come on, help.

Ned, help! You're just standing there

Staring at the ground.

I think I smell melted cheese.

Oh, come on, give us another hint.

All right.

I'll give you all one more hint.

The answer is in this room.

It spins,

And you can easily find it on the web.

So can we use your computer?

No.

But you do smell melted cheese.

Heh heh heh heh!

[Evil laughter]

Either he's lost his mind,

Or that's a really fun chair.

[Watch beeping]

Ned, I've got good news and bad news.

The bad news is sweeney's jammed all web access,

So I can't help you.

What's the good news?

I'm still a cool watch.

Let them go, sweeney! They're hungry.

They smell melted cheese, and...i've got moze power!

Go get him!

You're a big girl.

What? He's evil.

Your moze power is nothing compared to my powers!

Aah!

No fair! You sh**t webs?

Hey, it's your daydream.

Oh, we should have stayed in the car.

A web, wait a minute! That's it!

The answer is in this room...

It spins...

You can easily find it on the web...

I know the answer.

I know the answer.

I know the answer!

Oh, this should be good.

Those words are together because they're all spiders.

Ha ha ha ha!

That's right.

[All cheering]

How does he do it?

My hero!

What are you doing?

Uh, nothing.

Mr. Bigby,

How did you manage to figure out the puzzle?

When you trapped me in your evil web powers,

It all became clear.

Oh. Right.

Well done.

Daydreaming is more than taking a field trip in your head.

It's a way your brain figures out problems

And comes up with solutions to stuff.

It's how inventors invent. It's how scientists do science.

And it's how new ideas are born.

Last slice!

And sometimes...

A daydream's exactly what you need.

If only life were like this!

Gym is the only time

You're encouraged to run around like a maniac

And blow off some steam.

[Screams]

The problem is you go back to class all sweaty and...

A little stinky.

So here are some tips to avoid

That sticky-soggy-after-gym feeling.

Ned, voice-over: leave the shaggy sweats at home.

You'll look cool, but you'll be hot.

Make sure you wash your gym clothes once a week.

Or they will hurt you.

And if you're not a fan of the school shower,

Keep yourself fresh and cool with a sink shower.

And all sweating aside, gym is great.

There's no test, now homework, you just get to kick back.

Hi-yah!

[Boys laughing]

Loomer: hey, ned got b*at up by a girl.

[Laughs]

I'm ned bigby, and I got b*at up by a girl.

Strange boy.

[Laughing]

[Sighs]

Ahem. Ah, um.

Hey, how's it going?

Great, you know,

And everyone is just saying I got b*at up by a girl.

You did. I really kicked you on your butt.

I was deep in thought. It was a way lucky kick. I could so take you.

Take it easy, crouching weasel.

I was just kidding.

Oh, yeah, me, too. Ha ha!

And I have been b*ating you up since pre-k. What's the big deal now?

It's not a big deal.

Especially after I destroy you in gym tomorrow.

[Breathing hard]

Hey, guys, how is it going?

Man, you're sweaty. Bullies? Pop quiz?

Gym.

You know I have anti-sweaty-sticky gym tips?

No, I don't need them.

I've got my own plan.

I'm just not gonna sweat in gym anymore.

It's impossible.

I don't know the meaning

Of the word impossible.

And I'm not gonna look it up.

Ish...yah!

Woosh!

Don't fight the power.

Be the power. Become one with the power.

[Crash]

Oh!

A ball of glass will bounce higher

Than a ball of rubber. Got it?

Students: yeah.

I get it.

Right on.

There's an odd number of boys and girls,

So one girl will have to pair up with a boy and spar.

Ok?

Break!

Size does not matter in martial arts.

Bruce lee was '", pounds.

Spar.

I'm only inches and pounds away

From maximum butt-kicking ability

Martin, I'm just trying to get to moze.

Oh, ok.

Mind if I cut in?

Actually, I wanted to spar with moze.

All right, moze.

You ready to get stomped?

Are you sure you want to do this?

You look a little out of it.

Oh, getting scared, huh?

Should have thought of that before you mess with ned!

It's the st century. Girls are tough.

Oh, yeah, sure. Uh-huh.

Bring it on.

Hey, look, bigby got b*at up by a girl...again!

Ha ha ha!

Whoa!

Ha ha ha!

So, do we have a deal?

It'll cost you a week of math homework.

Deal.

♪ Every day been clocking in on time ♪

♪ I've got something else on my mind ♪

♪ ...any overtime

♪ Will take you to work

♪ It's on your way, the kids are gonna play ♪

♪ And I'm runnin' it

Yow!

Move it, move it!

What are you afraid of? Get down off the wall!

I don't see anybody laughing. Isn't it fun? Good job!

Whoo!

♪ I can do it like that

♪ We can do it like that

[Funky music continues]

So you finally broke down

And took a shower after gym?

Nope. I used my mind instead of my body.

And I came out smelling like a rose.

Go on, smell me. Smell me!

I'll take your word for it.

You would think watching a guy

Get his butt kicked by a girl every day would get boring...

But this just keeps getting better and better.

[Boys laughing]

I was tired by the time we sparred.

That's why you flipped me so easy.

Are you still worrying about that?

Some of the toughest people in history were women.

Joan of arc, amelia earhart--

Wonder woman.

Moze, you and I are best friends,

And I like you a lot.

But tomorrow, I'm gonna flip you faster than a pancake

At a flapjack breakfast. If you know what I mean.

I think you do.

Yeah.

You're doomed.

Man on speaker: ned bigby, please report to the janitor's closet.

Ned bigby, to the janitor's closet, please.

So, I happened to overhear your problem,

Which is easy when you have one of these.

Look, fighting a girl is a no-win situation.

What do you mean?

Well, if you lose, you got b*at up by a girl.

But what if I win?

Then you just b*at up a girl!

Now, having said that, I recommend flipping her, big time.

[Knocks]in a meeting!

I mean, senseless v*olence

Is the last thing we men have left.

If women take that away...

[Knocks]

Yeah, working with toxic chemicals in here.

Neddie, remember, we're men,

And we must remain manly.

[Door crashing]

Didn't I tell you to clean up the kitchen?

Oh, yeah, I'm gonna have the night guy do it.

No, gordy, you're doing it right now.

Come on!

Ow, ow!

Stand firm, ned!

Be a warrior! Ah!

A warrior!

Coach stax, I want to be a warrior.

Warriors are not made. They are born.

Are you a warrior?

Uh, I think so.

Warriors don't think.

They know.

Are you a warrior?

Yes, yes, I am a warrior.

Hyah!

But you have a lot to learn.

Move in circular motion, like so.

So, was this exercise to build my upper-body strength?

No, gordy never cleans these floors.

They were filthy.

I just wanted to learn how to flip somebody.

I can do that.

Remember what I taught you now.

There's many ways to take down an opponent.

Find the right moment and move in.

Whaa!

Yes! Watch out, moze,

'Cause no girl's ever gonna flip me again.

What? You mean, all this is over a girl flipping you?

You sound like a flipping fool.

Jennifer's your friend, right?

Yeah?you respect her, right?

Yeah.

So there's no shame in you losing to her, right?

Right.

Of course I'm right. I'm coach stax.

You guys did good yesterday.

With the exception of you, cook.

You did great.

[Chuckles]

Give me speed push-ups.

[Strains]

[Cries]

I knew you were scamming me, cook,

But I didn't think you'd break that fast.

I just didn't want to sweat.

Oh, cook, a smart kid like you should know

That exercise sharpens the mind

And makes you a better learner.

Now, get out there and run two miles.

Two miles?

All right...

Just run until you puke!

Hey, kung fu, why don't you lay down on the mat

And save jennifer some trouble?

Yeah, tae kwon dork.

[Laughs]

All right, people, this is the last day of self-defense.

Now show me what you've learned.

Get to sparring.

What are you waiting for? Just flip me.

Why do you want me to flip you?

I saw loomer taunting you, so it's ok. Flip me.

Thanks, but I don't care how many times you flip me.

I realize now that a rubber chicken

Bounces higher than a glass menagerie.

Come on, jennifer.

I want to see loser get his butt flipped.

You got it.

Ow.

How did she do that?

It's easy.

Uh? Oh!

[Loomer laughing]

Yeah, man.

Ned, voice-over: so, cookie solved his shower problem with my sink shower tip.

But he still needs to work at it.

And thanks to coach stax...

Right on.

And moze's flipping power,

Me, loomer, and crony entered the st century the hard way.

Oh!

You really enjoy hurting me, don't you?

Both: right on.