02x12 - Pinata Regatta

[bunniefuu]

♪♪♪

♪♪♪

Chef: Hey, Kids! Guess what day it is?!

("The Mexican Hat Dance" music, fireworks whistle and pop)

All: Cinco De Mayo!

- That's right! (Loud pop) Whoa!

(Flames crackle)

(Stomping, grunts)

And do you all understand (stomp)

why Cinco De Mayo is, (stomp) is important?

- Of course we do:

piñataaaas!

It's the one day a year we get rewarded for vandalism!

(Smash) - Correct-o-mundo!

- Actually Chef,

there's more to Cinco De Mayo than piñatas.

- That's true. There's also a...

taco baaaaar!

All: Ooooh!!!!

- And later we'll all take a nice siesta.

- That just means nap time!

We always have nap time!

- Not today! Today it's siesta!

- (Groans) Cinco De Mayo's celebrates the day

Mexico drove off French invaders!

We should spend the day researching

the true meaning of--

- Sure we'll get right on that.

(Singsong) Time to get our smash on!

(Grunts, thuds)

- (Gasp) Chef! Do something!

- Oh, right!

Your form's all wrong, kids.

Keep your back elbow up and follow through!

(Whack!)

(Cheering)

- And now for some real piñatas!

- (Excited) Woo-hoo! - Yeah!

(Clank) - (Pained moans)

- You shall not pass!

- What? Why?

- What did these piñatas ever do to you?

We must protect all of nature's creations.

- Izzy, I want to agree,

but it feels like you've had to stick up

for nature a lot lately.

- What?! He's just playing!

(Giggles) It's just like a big sticky sleeping bag!

Cody: Ummm...

- (Roaring) - Yaaaaahhh!

Every building should have a dinosaur on top!

Those only sound bad if you remember them.

- Izzy, I understand your feelings,

but piñatas aren't alive.

In fact, there's nothing natural about 'em!

They come from the deranged,

sugar crazed minds of human beings.

- Oh... (lock clicks open)

okey-dokey then.

- (Excited) Yeahhhh!

(Blows whistle)

- Now that everyone is in position,

let us begin! Blindfolds tight!

Bats up!

Now kids,

every piñata must be destroyed before siesta.

Every. Last. One.

- Why is he saying it like that?

- Who cares, it's smashin' time!

Chef: .........

aaatttttaaaccckkk!!

(Effort grunts)

(Smash!)

- Yaaaaah!

(Effort grunts)

Oof! (Groans)

- (Effort grunts) Ya! Ha! Hmmm.

(Poof)

- I'm a piñata!

(Trailing scream)

(Clanks) - Wow!

This is a tough one! I need back up!

- Hey! What are you doin' to my car?

No! Stop! Please!

- Mmm! This candy's really hard!

- (Weeping) why? Why?!

- Well, I guess that's the last of 'em--

(Rustle) - Huh?

Wait. What's a piñata doing here?

Eh, doesn't matter, imma smash it good!

HA!

- (Squeaky whimper)

- (Gasp) You're alive?

I knew we shouldn't be smashing you guys!

- (Blows party favour) - (Giggles)

Hmm... what should I name you?

(Gasp) I know! I'll call you... Piñata.

- I need more smashing! (Battle cry)

- Okayyyy. Let's find you somewhere safe to hide.

Perfect! You won't get hurt in there!

Piñata: (Toots in pain)

Chef: Yep. Uh-huh.

Very good.

Job well done, my tiny army.

(Beeping)

Now look at that: just in time, too.

Now, uh... We are sure we smashed every last one, right?

- (Mouth full) Yes. Yep.

- Are we sure we're sure?

- Oh yes, Chef. Every last one.

- I mean yeesh! Heh heh am I right?

- Whew. Looks like we dodged that b*llet for another year.

Time for a siesta!

Oh hey, Izzy. Why no candy?

- Me? Oh, uh...

I'm uh, saving room for the uh, taco bar. Heh heh.

- I don't blame ya.

She. Is. Ay. Beaut!

- (Gasps)

(Tongue toots) (Attack yell)

- Izz-zyy! It's not taco time yet!

- Uh, I'm making mine for later. See?

- Uh...?

And now I will place it by this open window...

to cool... heh heh.

- Well! That checks out! Have a good nap!

- Whew.

Dangling from a swing?!

That's the worst place for a piñata!

Piñata?! You can't play out in the open like that!

- (Toots)

- Ohhhh, what am I gonna do with you?

(Squeaks, strains)

- Whoa! You can lay candies?

(Squeaks, strains) Wow! A lot of candies!

But if you can do that,

why do people smash your guts out every Cinco De Mayo?

(Fizzling)

(Poof)

(Angry snort)

- Don't take this the wrong way,

but you're less cute than your mom.

(Roars)

- Woof. Toffee breath.

(Fizzling)

- Uh oh.

(Door opens, clears throat)

Hey Chef, I have a Cinco De Mayo question.

Hippopotamusly speaking...

if all the piñatas weren't destroyed before siesta...

what would happen?

- (Sighs) Izzy.

I think it's time you learned the truth about piñatas.

"Once upon a time,

there was a great battle between the Mexican

and the invading French armies.

Mexico was victorious!

So they celebrated by smashing toys full of candy."

- Really?! - It made sense at the time.

"But then the celebrations got bigger and bigger.

Normal piñatas weren't enough anymore.

So they made super giant piñatas!

(Zap)

Which naturally... immediately turned evil."

(Roars)

"The army was called in,

but even they were no match for the piñatas!

Luckily, as it turns out,

all piñatas are vulnerable

to blindfolded children with sticks,

so the uprising was contained."

So now, every Cinco De Mayo,

we round 'em up for smashin'.

If we didn't...

they could take over the world!

- Whoa.

- Whoa is right.

So it's a good thing we smashed every last one, right?

- Heh... about that...

- Noooooooooooooooo!

(Evil neighs, roaring)

- I'm sorry!

My piñata was just so cute!

I didn't think it'd take over the world!

- Okay. This is bad.

But we're not throwing in the taco just yet.

We will fight! We will fight them on the slide!

We will fight them on-- ahhhhh!

- (Gulps)

- Hey! He wasn't finished his long boring speech!

(Toots) - Yikes!

Ahhhhhh!

Guys! Help! I kept a piñata as a pet and it turned evil

and now it's poops are taking over the world

and we gotta stop 'em! Oh, and they ate Chef.

All: (Pained groans)

- Sorry, Izzy. Can't move.

(Gurgles) Too full.

(Groans)

- Then it looks like... it's up to me.

♪♪♪

Time to crush some candy!

(w*r cry)

Ooof!

Ahhhh! Oof!

(Groans)

Piñ-ya-taaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

(Toots)

(Candy whooshes)

(Landing thuds)

Hm. (Battle cry)

Hi-ya!

Agh!

(Toots)

(Attack yell)

- Oof! - Chef! Are you okay?

- (Coughs)

Don't worry about me!

You have to smash the head piñata!

It's vampire rules, Izzy!

Vampire rules!

- (Toots)

- (Attack yell) - (Distressed toot)

- Sorry, piñata.

I guess you're just too sweet for this world.

(Squeaky whimpers)

- (Sigh) I know you spawned an army

bent on destroying mankind,

but I still can't bear to see you hurt.

So it's lucky I still have this blindfold.

(Fizzles, toots)

- Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! - (Roars)

- Izzyyyyy! Noooooooooo!

(Evil cackle)

(Rumbling, toots)

(Poof)

- Enjoy your siesta.

(Candy whooshes)

♪♪♪

- Izzy, you saved me!

And my job!

(Stick whooshes) - Hmm.

Well, that was fun.

Time to hit the taco bar.

- Well, kids,

I think we all learned a valuable lesson today.

- Yeah. Right. - I didn't learn anything.

- How to survive yet another holiday!

- I can't wait for international shark day!

Chef: (Groans)

♪♪♪

♪♪♪

♪♪♪