02x04 - Dial Margaret for m*rder

[bunniefuu]

MARGARET: Hello, Merritt?
Uh, can you hear me?

MERRITT [ON SPEAKER]:
Yes, Margaret, I'm here.

And it's finally happening.

The Lee sisters just fired their
seventh attorney in seven months,

and you are going to
acquire them as clients.

The Lee sisters are worth 40 million,

and handling their
foundation would yield

a two-percent commission
rate that could keep us afloat

for the next few months.

And we need that.

But as I'm sure you've been told,

they are monsters,

and they're coming in tomorrow.

Can I trust you to seal this deal?

Of course.

I-I thought we prepared all this.

We started, but you've been too busy

- to finish the presentation.
- Oh...

And I've been covering for
the office manager you fired.

[SIGHS SHARPLY]

I could just hear it in Merritt's voice,

dripping with condescension.

He doesn't think that

I can land these clients?
[CHUCKLES SNIDELY]

We have to pull out all the stops;

the full dog and pony show.

You do realize I will be the one

- doing all the work?
- Francey, I'll help.

We need this.

And I need to talk to you.

No, not now, Todd. Very busy.

So, Francey, we will
work through the night.

- Oh, great.
- Oh!

- You can come to dinner. Yes.
- Oh.

Now, go get one of those
young paralegals to help you.

- Yeah, yeah.
- Go, go, go, go, go.

Okay, what is it, Todd? I'm busy.

Close the door.

Sit down.

Anything you'd like to tell me?

About what?

Cheap toilet paper, bad coffee.

Fresh pastries in the kitchen, gone.

Flowers in the lobby, gone.

Lisa, the office manager, gone.

And no replacement.

Oh, Todd...

I am not Portland's best
detective-to-be for nothing.

- We're in financial trouble, aren't we?
- Uh...

The firm is cutting back.

People, things disappearing.

You cut my salary in half.
It all makes sense now.

Todd, we are not in any trouble.

I am in charge of financial decisions,

and-and we are just being
efficient. [LAUGHS WEAKLY]

You're lying to me.

Look at you, you're
avoiding eye contact.

Hey, stop moving around.

Mom, we're in trouble.
Why didn't you tell me?

Y-You don't trust me?

I mean, after all we've been through,

I thought we were Batman and Robin,

Cagney and Lacey, Sherlock and Holmes.

Oh, I trust you just fine, I do.

I mean, there's really
nothing serious to report.

I am holding it all together.

I will see you at dinner.

[SCOFFS]

[MARGARET SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]

Ow.

Well, if Clem doesn't
have a visible rash,

then I doubt it's actually
hand, foot and mouth.

Make it blue and change the font.

This whole presentation
has to read as classy.

This font is literally called "Classy."

What is going on?

Oh, well, we are trying to woo

a very big, very
difficult client, and...

- Francey, no. Blue.
- Don't you have pie in the oven?

- You didn't eat a thing, Todd.
- I'm sorry. Yeah.

CHET: Oh, uh, you're
not gonna eat that roll?

Uh, no, no, no. Go ahead. Here.

Uh, so you'll share food
with Chet and not me?

If you eat my food in my home,
then you should be replacing it.

- I don't think so. Whatever.
- Okay, well, it's my home.

Feel like I heard this
conversation in reverse last year.

- Todd, look, I made your favorite pie.
- Mm. Ooh. Mm-hmm.

Yeah, Ma, thanks. I
just don't think I can.

Oh, wait, I forgot to tell you

because you were being
so annoying this morning.

I had a patient in the ER, a PI,

and he caught the Rogue
River serial k*ller?

Wait, what? Seriously? Richard Franks?

d*ck Franks, the detective? That's cool.

I think we have way too many slides.

- Well, we also need cookies...
- Ah! God!

I think I pulled a muscle in my side.

It's k*lling me.

And is it freezing in
here? It's cold, right?

Is it right side, like,
just below your waist?

What? Uh, yeah. Yeah, I don't know.

Does it hurt on the other
side, the left? Just press here.

My other side? Uh, no. It...

- Now release.
- What?

Ow! What the hell?

That made this side hurt more.

- Probably gas.
- How long until that coffee is ready?

- Oh, Allison, are you in a hurry?
- No, but Todd is.

That's appendicitis, and I'm 95% sure

it's coming out tonight.

- What?! My appendix is what?
- Has it burst?

- Do you have to-go cups?
- [STAMMERING]

For the coffee, not for his appendix.

- You'll be fine.
- What? No.

You're taking it out now?

No. No, I'm helping you
out of your chair. Please.

- Mom, coffee.
- I'm going.

No, no, no, no. What are you
doing? Why? I don't want to.

I'll eat the pie, I'll
eat the pie, I don't care.

[TODD GROANING IN PAIN]

Shouldn't we be in a
life-flight helicopter?

Or can't you just run
all these red lights?

Yeah, sure. Should I also
drive with my eyes closed?

Wait, wait, wait, wait.
Go back. I forgot my phone.

- No, I'm not...
- [TODD CRIES OUT]

We're not turning around for a phone.

You're the one who wanted
coffee before we left.

You chose coffee over my life, Allison.

To keep me awake while I
ambulance you to the hospital.

But actually, you know what,

there is a Starbucks up ahead...

No. No, no. Go, go! [GROANS]

Ow!

Robin, this is that
CT scan I called about.

Hey, Shelley, can you
have Cleo prep OR-B?

Orb? What's Orb? Why
are you speaking in code?

Operating Room B. He's hysterical.

Can someone get him
something to calm him down

or paralyze his mouth?

- [SCREAMS]
- Yes, you can still have children

after an appendectomy. Are you kidding?

Are you getting me the best surgeon?

Am I a priority patient?

Or else what's the point
of having you as a sister?

I ask myself that a lot.

Wait. What?

Isn't that the robot that
k*lled all those people?

Yeah, but they fixed it.

I think they fixed it.
Gosh, I hope they fixed it.

I guess we're gonna find out.

TODD: A-am I going under?

Am I under? Is this under?!

Todd, count backwards from ten.

Okay. Uh, Z-Y-X-8-7...

- Everything's gonna be fine, Todd.
- TODD: Uh, V.

- Two, one...
- ALLISON: Todd?

[ECHOING]: Todd?

Todd?

Todd? Todd.

Hello.

Todd.

Todd, Todd. Oh, sorry. Hi, honey.

- Wha...
- You're all right.

Everything's fine. They
took your appendix out,

- and you're fine.
- Oh, oh, I'm... I'm okay?

Yes. Thank God for your sister.

How-how long was I out
for? What time is it?

Oh. Oh, it is 4:26 in the morning.

But now everything's fine.

I promise you, you're
good. You're... [GROANS]

- I've got to go.
- Where are you going?

Well, I've got that big presentation

in a couple of hours,
and I am barely alive.

Oh, my God, I feel like
I'm just ping-ponging

from one crisis to the next.

Okay, but I will be back
just as soon as I can.

Oh, Todd, Todd, here are your EarBods.

- I found them in your pocket.
- Great.

No, I'm just gonna hold on to them.

Wait, where's my watch?

- Uh, my-my-my phone?
- Todd.

- Lie down, hon.
- No, I...

Lie flat, lie down, okay.

Now, here is your pain drip.

- Mm-hmm.
- Right?

If you feel any discomfort,

you just press that
little button right there.

- Okay.
- Ah, but...

Once an hour only.

- Oh. Uh...
- Okay? I'm gonna take it from you.

Darling, I'm so glad you're okay.

- [KISSES]
- [MAN GROANING]

There's somebody else in here?

Yes, but-but I thought he was sleeping

- the whole time.
- [GROANS]

Okay. Good night.

Good night, honey. I love you.

Okay. Love you.

Love you. Bye.

Oh, my God, I've got so much to do.

Oh, excuse me. Uh, Doctor.

Yes, hello. Um, I
just wanted you to know

that my son is awake
now. Todd, in Room 405.

I'll take care of it.

Uh... Thank you.

♪ ♪

[THUNDER CRASHING]

[MAN MUTTERING]

Judge...

Pelican.

[GROANING]

- m*rder.
- [THUNDER ROLLING]

[THUNDER CRASHES]

[GROANS]

[WEAKLY]: Hi.

I-I don't... I don't need that.

[MOANS SOFTLY]

♪ ♪

So, should you choose to
retain CF&W as your attorneys,

I might recommend splitting
your many, wonderful

charitable foundations
into individual entities,

each with their own operating principle

and insurance policies.

What's that mean?

It's lawyer talk for "liability."

- So she means money.
- Mm.

[STAMMERS, LAUGHS]

With a net worth such as yours,

ladies, should something
go wrong in one area,

we would want to cordon
off... Next slide, Francey.

We would want to cordon off

the, uh, damage in order
to protect your other...

Oh, she's just like
all the others, Till.

Terrified, scurrying around

like a frightened little mouse.

[SOFTLY]: Uh...

- And this coffee tastes awful.
- Oh.

[GROANING]

Hello...

You're alive.

Something must've gone wrong.

Ugh, yeah, I feel weird
and dizzy and out of it.

Mm-hmm, so totally normal.

Your cholesterol is mildly
alarming, by the way.

You're mildly alarming, by the way.

- What happened to my roommate?
- Who?

The guy who was in that bed,
last night, there. Right there.

No idea, he's not my patient,

and I just got here.

Uh, you look like you're fine.

Just with lunatic hair.

Oh, I have lunatic hair?

Nice. Um, okay. I got to
get back down to the ER,

- but...
- Wait, no, wait.

There was a guy here last night,

in that bed, talking about a-a m*rder?

And-and he was plotting
with this redheaded doctor.

A-a... a Dr. Jelen?

Okay.

Hey, Olivia?

Would you have Dr. Jelen
circle back here? Thanks.

Did anyone mention that you are
high as a kite on painkillers?

No, I overheard them talking.

Something about murdering
a-a judge. Uh, Judge Pelican?

Oh, yes, of course.

That makes a lot of sense.

- Mm-hmm.
- Hey.

Hi, um, Todd, this is Dr. Jelen.

Dr. Jelen,

meet my hallucinating brother.

Hello, hallucinating brother.

You? You're a different person.

Funny how that works. Thanks, Murray.

Todd, in medical terms,

you are "hopped up on goofballs."

And things might look
different to the paranoid,

amateur, scattershot,

conspiracy theorist-leaning brain.

MAN [OVER P.A.]: Paging
Dr. Grant, ER Module 12.

You know, I'm at work, at my job,

and I'm being summoned
by Chuck's last name.

I don't love it.

You know, I was kind of thinking

I might maybe open a sandwich shop.

- What? No, you weren't.
- Yeah, I was.

Like a thatched bungalow
with ham and cheese...

A thatched bungalow? Who
are you, Peter Rabbit?

Can you just find out what
happened to my roommate?

No, I can't and I will not.

- I got to go.
- Wait, wait, wait, Al.

What am I supposed to do here?
I don't even have my phone.

There's, um, there's a
phone in the wall behind you.

What? Seriously?

Yeah. Welcome back to 1999.

[GRUNTS]

Wait, I don't even know
anyone's phone number.

[PHONES RINGING]

Okay.

Crest, Folding & Wright. This is Susan.

Oh, Susan. Thank God. Finally.
My finger is k*lling me.

Wait, what do you mean your finger?

I heard it was your appendix.

We are working here.

TODD: No, no, i-it's
fine. It doesn't matter.

Um, can you google something for me?

It's important.

The Heidecker Leibenshein
divorce is important.

I am literally in the hospital,

on my death bed, Lyle.

[SCOFFS] Believe that when I see it.

SUSAN: What do you need, Todd?

Um, is there a...

Can you find a Judge Pelican
in the local courts or anywhere

- in Oregon, actually?
- [SCOFFS] Judge Pelican?

Should we also search
for Officer Hippopotamus?

Not seeing any Judge Pelicans.

Try Detective Birdbrain.

Okay, okay, can you just, um...

Can you just transfer me to my mom?

MILDRED: Listen, I'm
telling you, she's no better

than the rest. Just like before.

TILLIE: And I'm telling you she's
like all the others but worse.

- Oh, Francey.
- What are you doing?

Thank you, but these
are not going to help.

Oh, God.

Am I really a frightened little mouse?

No.

And I paid 27 bucks each for
these little cakes, so you...

Oh. Yeah. Todd is on the phone.

You can take it over here.

- There.
- Great.

Hello, sweetheart?

Mom, Mom, okay. Uh, listen,

you remember last night,
that guy that was groaning?

Groaning? What? No. Who's groaning?

No. Last night, in my hospital room,

that guy, my roommate, he was groaning,

and then I saw him talking

to this mysterious woman with red hair.

Oh, red hair. Yes, yes, I saw her.

- The doctor in the hallway?
- You did?

Wow. Okay. Uh, well,
uh, she's not a doctor.

She's a totally different person.

- She's a what?
- TODD: Yes, and then

my roommate disappeared,
or I don't know what,

but then he and that redheaded woman

were definitely involved
in some-some m*rder plot,

and they are trying to k*ll a...

- a Judge Pelican?
- MARGARET: Oh, Todd.

There is no Judge Pelican in Portland.

- [LAUGHS]
- [SIGHS]

Oh, oh.

Uh, Todd,

sweetheart, this is
not a good time for me.

Listen, I will be at
the hospital later on...

No, Mom, I'm serious.
You have to believe me.

I think someone is
gonna get m*rder*d and...

Todd, you were medicated.

No one is going to get m*rder*d.

Todd, why don't you just lie down,

and calm down,

and I will be there, uh, very soon.

What is with you not trusting me?

- I...
- Mom?

Mom! [SIGHS]

[SIGHS]

Todd, this is d*ck Franks,

the detective I was telling you about.

He's going to be your new roommate,

so that, uh, you guys
have stuff to talk about,

and you'll both leave me alone.

d*ck, no smoking.

[GROWLS]

Okay.

- [DOOR CLOSES]
- Wait, you're, uh,

you're d*ck Franks. That's you.

The guy that caught the
Rogue River serial k*ller.

I sure as Shirley am.

- Huh.
- Hell of a m*rder*r,

that son of a bitch.
Stabbed me in the eye.

Oh, i-in which eye?

- Maybe it was the leg.
- Huh.

Hey, you got a cigarette?

Oh, uh, there's no smoking in here.

Ah, man, there's no
smoking anywhere anymore.

What is this, a hospital?

Uh... yes.

You know, you're the first
detective I ever heard of,

when I was a kid, a-and I, uh,

I listened to that
podcast about you, too.

- No, all lies.
- Oh, no,

I was impressed by how you
caught that serial k*ller

with the telegram and the string.

Oh, yeah, that part's true.
I guess I'm kind of a genius.

Hey, kid, tell me something,

what is that do you do for a living?

'Cause you look kind
of like a barber to me.

Oh. Uh, no. I'm-I'm,
uh-uh, not a barber.

Actually, I'm... kind
of a detective, too.

I mean, not at your level,
not yet, but someday,

I hope,

but, no, uh, right now,
I'm working in-house

at a law firm for my...

well, for my mother.

A-are-are you kidding me?

No.

What?

- That's beautiful.
- Really?

Yeah. God, man.

You know, if I'd had a mother,

I would've loved to have worked for her.

- Yeah.
- Tell me something, kid,

y-you work close with this mom of yours?

You know, you guys side by
side? Thick as thieves, hmm?

Uh, yes, actually, most of the time.

Yeah, we make a pretty good team.

I mean, except for right now. [SIGHS]

I think I'm onto something,

and she doesn't believe me. Nobody does.

Hey, kid, listen to me,

nobody is ever gonna
believe you about anything.

That's just the life of a detective.

You want to be a real PI?

You want to be a famous one like me?

Yeah, yes, yes.

Okay, then you're gonna
be on your own forever.

Okay, you're gonna be
sleeping in the shadows.

You're gonna be hiding in the corners,

stuffing garbage down your
pants just to keep warm at night.

You're gonna become a lone wolf.
Nobody believes you? [SCOFFS]

That's fine, 'cause there's
only two things that matter,

all right? There's the
case and there's the truth.

You got me?

- A lone wolf?
- Yeah, a lone wolf.

And pay attention to this one,

you got to stay away from the ladies.

All right? If I had a dollar

for every corn cob
that tried to marry me

and ruin my focus, I'd have...

three dollars

- Huh...
- It's when I got ground down

to nothing, that my life just...
[BLOWS RASPBERRY]

... completely fell apart.

- Yeah, I've been there.
- Yeah.

That's when your skills,
they sharpen to a fine point,

but you got to keep
to yourself, all right?

No girls, no boys, huh?

- Well... Okay.
- [CHUCKLES] No personal life

and no distractions, and
that's when you find, kid,

that you're gonna rise.

You're gonna rise all
the way up. All right?

Like a lone wolf. [HOWLING]

[HOWLING]

[CAR HORNS HONKING]

Ladies,

while it is unfortunate that you
had to fire your driver today...

He was an idiot. Drove
around like a pithed frog.

Why is she still talking?

[SIGHS] It-it allows me one last
chance to try to convince you

that Crest, Folding & Wright

is the exact right firm for
all of your needs at this...

Wait.

Isn't that...

Pelican Auditorium.

[GASPS] Pelican.

Excuse me.

[LINE RINGS]

OPERATOR [OVER PHONE]: Oregon
Medical Science Hospital.

Uh, y-yes, Room 405,
please. Todd Wright.

- Just a moment.
- What's going on?

Who's Todd?

[TELEPHONE RINGS]

- Hello?
- MARGARET [OVER PHONE]: Todd.

Do you remember that-that
redheaded woman from the hospital?

Well, I saw her just now walking
into the Pelican Auditorium.

TODD: What? Oh, my God.

Pelican isn't a person,

- it's a place.
- Yes.

And... didn't you say something

- about a m*rder?
- What's that?

A m*rder*r.

- A m*rder*r?
- TODD: Oh, yes.

I think she's plotting
to m*rder some judge.

Yes, well, I saw her just now.

Uh, sh-should I follow her?

What? No. Mom, whatever
you do, do not follow her.

You are not an investigator.
She could be dangerous.

Dangerous?

You don't think I can handle myself?

No. No, Mom, in this moment, I do not

trust you. Do not follow her.

Wait, the doctor is here. I'm
allowed to be on the phone.

- My sister said.
- [LINE BEEPS OFF]

Wait, Todd. Todd.

We're following a dangerous m*rder*r.

How exciting.

Ladies,

I have to take an unexpected
detour to follow a suspect.

Would you care to join me?

BOTH: Yes!

Who would want to m*rder a judge?

I don't know.

My son overheard the
words "m*rder," "Pelican,"

"judge."

[INDISTINCT CHATTER, MEOWING]

[CATS MEOWING]

A cat show?

TILLIE: With cat show judges.

Oh...

[CAT YOWLS]

[INHALES SHARPLY]

Could this just be another...

Is someone really going
to m*rder a cat show judge?

Oh, no, no, no, no, no,
ladies, stay with me.

In my experience, situations like these

are-are ever-developing

and may require further
inve... [GASPS] ... stigation.

Wait a minute. Is that...

Judge Brandon Ortiz,

from the Fourth District Judicial Court.

Ladies, give me a minute.

[CAT MEWS]

Um...

I just... Wait, wait, wait. [SHRIEKS]

Okay, take your hands off
me, please. Oh, oh, oh.

Oh, what's going on?

[GASPS]

Who are you, and what
are you doing here?

Thomas Branigan, FBI.

What business do you
have with Judge Ortiz?

- Well, I came, I came to...
- Bribe him? Grease the wheels?

Marty, shut up.

Judge Ortiz is taking bribes?

From some crooked lawyer. That you?

- Marty, hey.
- [YELPS] Me?

A crooked lawyer? How dare you?

Look, lady, what are you doing here?

Well...

I came

because I have reason to believe

that Judge Ortiz

might be m*rder*d.

[LAUGHTER]

I'm serious.

M-My son... my informant
overheard a plot

of-of sorts in the hospital.

Well, after his appendectomy.

- I...
- Okay, okay, enough nonsense.

Take this woman to holding.

MARTIN: Hey, guys, we got
another for the "Karen Room."

- [LAUGHTER]
- No, no, no.

It's not funny. No, wait, please.

ALLISON: You cannot
keep calling me up here.

I have actual patients
downstairs in actual distress.

I am in distress. I am.

I am very distressed because
Mom saw the same redhead I saw.

ALLISON: Todd, a man downstairs
has to have his leg reattached.

Yes, and I want to
hear about that, I do,

and I'd like to see pictures,
but can't you just find out

what happened to my previous roommate?

- No, I can't.
- d*ck: Hey, Doc, Doc.

My heart, it's... it's
racing kind of fast.

- I feel real bad.
- Okay.

Please just stay in bed and recover.

There is no conspiracy

and there was no redhead.

[GRUNTING]

ALLISON: It sounds normal,

but I'll have your
physician come by. Todd.

- Hmm?
- Stop harassing me.

What is that? Is that her tablet?

Hey, kid, you got to learn
the art of distraction.

I thought you said that
you were a detective.

Now, what do you say

we get some info on that
old roommate of yours?

- Mm-hmm. Oh.
- [TELEPHONE RINGS]

Hello?

Oh, God, Todd. I am very upset.

I've completely lost the Lee sisters,

the FBI is here, and they have

put me in a "Karen Room."

I would like to speak
to a manager right now.

Do you know how much money I spend here?

I mean, can you believe... that?

[SIGHS] Me? A Karen?

Well...

Todd. Oh.

TODD: Wait, you're where?

I am at the Pelican Auditorium.

I found the judge, and I told the FBI

that I felt like he might be in danger,

but they laughed at me.
Todd, they laughed at me,

and... nobody believes me.

Well, well, welcome to
the club. How's it feel?

Awful.

Just awful.

Uh... Clearly, I should've
taken you more seriously earlier,

even on dr*gs.

Well, I forgive you. But wait, FBI?

And you found the judge?

Oh, no, I found a
judge. Uh, Judge Brandon Ortiz.

- [CAT MEOWS]
- Oh, my God.

And, uh, the FBI thinks

- that someone might be trying...
- [MEOWING]

... to bribe him, and not m*rder him.

Todd, I really feel like we need

to investigate this
a little bit further.

Yeah, well, I'm already
onto another lead,

but I don't have my phone and...

Ugh, it pains me to say this,

- but you should probably...
- TODD AND MARGARET: Call Lyle.

Yes, and call me back after
you talk to Mr. Mustache.

Now, ugh, my clients. Where are they?

Oh, maybe I should buy
a cat toy while I'm here.

Wait, cat toys?

Mom, would you please just call Lyle?

[PHONE BUZZES]

Ugh. Margaret?

MARGARET [OVER PHONE]: Lyle,
thank God you're working late.

I need you to do something for me.

Find out what Judge Brandon Ortiz is

working on... what cases.

And who would want to
bribe him or m*rder him.

TILLIE: For heaven's sake.

Get away from me.

Oh, I've got to go.

Uh, wait, Margaret. Did
she say, "m*rder him"?

- Margaret.
- Yes?

We have had the most
wonderful adventure.

And you're never going
to believe what we found.

Who we found.

Your redhead.

[GASPS] Long hair, slinky legs,

the sluttiest shoes...
a real femme fatale type.

- Yes.
- So we spotted her,

and we tailed her... just like spies...

to the parking garage,
and when she peeled out...

- In her gaudy red Mustang...
- We got her license plate.

Oh, she seems like a real dicey chippy.

Oh, terrific work, sisters.

But wait, how did you get in here?

- How do you think?
- Oh, we made a scene.

BOTH: We're old pros at that.

But how we're gonna spring
you is the real question.

Hmm.

Okay, look.

This new security guard
is local. He's not FBI.

So, when in Rome...

Leave it to me. I'm an old pro, too.

Excuse me, I'm an attorney.

You do realize that
holding us against our will

is technically kidnapping?

Now, my elderly clients,

- very elderly clients...
- [BOTH GROAN SOFTLY]

... they require access
to water, to facilities,

and if you do not open
that door right now,

I dare say you will soon be
charged with manslaughter.

Dear ladies...

- Impressive.
- She's a fighter.

Oh, okay. Come on.

Yeah. So don't try...

Bingo.

Room 405, la-dee-da
date, la-dee-da time...

His name was, uh, Stefan
Dobson and he is kersplitzo.

Wait, you did not just say kersplit...

Wait, he's dead? He d*ed?

- He's dead. Dead-dead? How?
- Yeah, well,

there ain't no alive dead, kid.

Not yet, anyway, and it looks
like the cause of death...

uh, it's just like it's
a bunch of codes and...

ALLISON: You have got to be kidding me.

You stole my tablet?
That is wrong and illegal.

- Uh-uh-uh-uh-uh!
- And you... Give that back to me right now.

But-but, wait, Allison,

just tell us what some
of those codes mean.

- Do what? No.
- Well, let's see, we got 550-J

and 23-stroke-6.

I am not telling you
what any of this means.

You are breaking one million laws.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait, wait, wait.

It says right here
that 550-J is the big C.

It's cancer.


it's anaphylactic sho...

Okay, yeah. Very clever. You got me.

Will you give me that before
I call security, please?

Wait, anaphylactic shock?
An allergic reaction?

That sounds suspicious...

Classic m*rder cover-up.

It isn't m*rder.

It's anaphylactic shock.

Unless...

... did you say 23-stroke-6?

Oh. Yeah, I did, baby.

Don't call me "baby."

That's anaphylactic shock
associated cardiomyopathy...

Give me that tablet.

Okay, I should not be saying this,

but your roommate had a heart condition,

the anaphylaxis propelled him
into acute heart failure...

This doesn't mean...

Allison, "This doesn't mean... "?

Well, that's exactly what it means.

Choo-choo. Get on
board the m*rder train.

Come on, baby.

Okay, let me do a little digging.

I will, um... No, that's mine.

Okay. I will... I will be back.

Yeah, I'm gonna... Okay.

Damn, that girl's hot, man.

And you need to get with her,

like, pronto. She's into you.

What? That's my sister.

Say what? I thought you were an orphan.

- Who said I was...
- [PHONE RINGING]

I've been on the phone
with my mother this whol...

Hello?

MARGARET: Todd, Todd, we're heading back

to the office right now
to meet up with Lyle.

TODD: Mom. Mom. My roommate.

The groaning guy?

His name was Stefan Dobson and he d*ed.

It was m*rder.

Well, Allison's checking on that.

But maybe that redhead k*lled him?

All right, all right.

Well, we have the
redhead's license plate.

And we're gonna get
Lyle to run it right now.

- Uh, Margaret?
- Uh-huh?

Uh, Margaret, dear?

Uh, hold up, Millie, please,
I'm talking to my son...

Uh, that license plate?

The red car we saw her leaving in?

It's following us.

TODD: Mom. Mom?

Todd, I am being tailed. By the redhead.

I'm in my car. She's...

in hers, behind us.

On the road. Two cars.

One following the other...

Yes, I understand tailing, Mom.

Okay, listen, I got you. We can do this.

First let's make sure she
is following you.

Change lanes.

MARGARET: Okay.

[GASPS]

She changed, too. She is following us.

I-I may have just wet my pants.

Okay. Great. Now, second,

change back and slow down.

- Just see what happens.
- Okay.

No, she didn't change.

She drove right by us.

Okay, great. Now, third...

I follow her.

Yeah. That's... Okay.

Maggie? Mag, Mag, Mag!

It's no time to be shy, honey.

Go! Go!

[PHONE BEEPS]

MARGARET: Todd, I have
to go, Lyle's calling.

- [DIAL TONE SOUNDS]
- What? Oh.

Lyle.

LYLE [OVER PHONE]: Margaret,
Susan and I found three cases

- Judge Ortiz is currently working on...
- Uh-huh.

Victor Neto v. Brulbaticcus
Maximus Arcade,

Deedee Starview v. Phishtopolis, and...

The State of Oregon v.
Portland Paper Mill.

Okay, wait... Ladies! Okay, okay.

I need you to find a way
to connect all three of them

or one of the three of
them to Stefan Dobson

or Stee-phan Dob... Whatever!

Just connect him to Judge Ortiz.

- All right?
- On it.

Where are we? Where are we going?

Hold on, hold on.

This is the exact same route that I take

to get home... Wait, hold on.

This is my exit.

Wait. Where's she...

[GASPS] Oh, my God.

Is she going to my condo?

ALLISON: Stefan Dobson
was dropped off at the ER

by his brother, Tobias Dobson.

They were having dinner,

Stefan was having trouble breathing.

Tobias told the ER that
Stefan had no known allergies.

And when I click here, I see that he was

severely allergic to penicillin.

Huh. Wait, his own brother didn't know

he was deathly allergic to penicillin?

- Do you know what Lawrence is allergic to?
- Clams.

- No?
- Mm-mm.

Oh, it was a good guess, though.

I mean, we're all on the
same team here, right?

Sure, yeah.

WOMAN [OVER P.A.]: Paging
Dr. Grant, Code White.

Damn it. Okay. All right. I, um...

I'm gonna go talk to hospital
security and just wait here.

I'll be right back. Um,
just, just wait, okay?

- TODD: Allison!
- No, no. Algebra.

Allifer!

Hey. Should we maybe,
like, call the cops?

What? No.

No, no, no, no, no, no,
no, no. no, no, no, no.

No, no, no, no.

You don't just give up
your huge lead to the cops.

- Right.
- What, are you nuts? No, no, no, no.

- This is our moment.
- Right.

- Okay? This is our Roman empire.
- Yeah.

Right? This is our Vietnam.

- Well...
- We got to see this

all the way through
to the end, all right?

Just you and me, Toad.

Wait, are you sure?

Yeah, I'm sure.

Yeah, I mean, the guy's already dead.

What are the cops gonna do, right?

No, no, no, no, no.

We let them come to us.

'Cause you know when
you've really made it, kid?

- When?
- You know when you've made it

when the authorities come to
you for assistance with a case.

- Huh?
- Huh.

MARGARET: Is she stalking me?

Am I the next victim?

Oh, wouldn't that be thrilling?

Come on, girls.

Wait a minute.

She's heading toward the
elevators for Tower 2.

But I live in Tower 1.

There's bound to be somebody
worth k*lling over there, too.

- [PHONE BUZZING]
- Oh. Lyle.

Stefan Dobson and his
brother Tobias Dobson

own the Portland Paper Mill company,

which is currently being
sued by the State of Oregon

for gross negligence...

In a case presided over
by Judge Brandon Ortiz.

- Aha.
- Aha.

Okay. Good work.

SUSAN: One of the Paper Mill's
warehouses collapsed, k*lling 16 people.

Also, this is an odd coincidence,

but it looks like Tobias Dobson has

the same address as... you?

On Cheltenham Street,
in South Waterfront?

What? Wait. What?

Tobias Dobson lives here?

- In Tower 2.
- LYLE: Yes.

In apartment number 1203.

Do you think that she's going up there

to k*ll the other brother?

- [PHONE BUZZES]
- Oh.

That's my friend from the D.A.'s office.

- We got to go.
- Okay, uh, call Todd.

Tell him everything. We have got to go.

LYLE [OVER PHONE]:
Well, I am merely calling

with this update because your mother

asked me to. I could just hang up...

- TODD [OVER PHONE]: Okay.
- Yes. Thank you.

That was my very close friend Poppy

with the inside scoop
from the D.A.'s office.

The dead brother Stefan
Dobson recently flipped

and became a witness for the prosecution

in exchange for immunity.

Stefan was set to testify
against his brother Tobias Dobson

in the trial before Judge Ortiz.

So Stefan...

Turned on Tobias.

I just said that.

Oh, my heart is
pounding. In the best way.

You're not like other lawyers, are you?

[CHUCKLING]: Well...

I've-I've always been very
determined, and-and hands on.

I get my man. [CHUCKLES]

And I have learned a thing
or two from my son, Todd.

He's a detective. We work together.

At the law firm.

It's a family business.

Just like yours.

Good God,

this tower is identical to...

Oh. There it is.



The southwest corner, just like mine...

This is a funeral?

- This is the victim.
- This is my exact apartment.

How did they get that brass chandelier?

I was never given that option.

Oh!

Look at this dark walnut paneling...

And... Oh. They have a black mantel?

Oh. Look. It's her.

Is that the fella she's going to k*ll?

I don't know.

And, oh, my God!

Is that a grey marble backsplash?

TOBIAS: Thank you for coming, everyone.

If we haven't yet met, I'm Tobias.

And this is my lovely wife Felicia.

ALL THREE: His wife?

And tonight we gather to honor Stefan,

- BOTH: Stefan.
- [SHUSHING]

My beloved and dearly departed brother.

Gone far, far too soon.

Okay, call me back.

Okay, so Stefan was
gonna tell the prosecutor

every criminal act that
the Portland Paper Mill

had committed, including covering up

for the warehouse
collapse, so that's motive.

Aw, man, it's always a
collapsed warehouse, come on.

Wait, what?

All right, I've spoken
with hospital security...

the night shift, Lois...

and she's gonna look into the matter.

There are legal and hospital protocols

that we have to follow here, Todd.

Yeah, we're legal. We're doing it.

Okay, so, Lois is going to
contact the police tomorrow.

But I did find one
semi-interesting thing

- that I think we can share with them.
- d*ck: Ooh, ooh!

A hand? A human hand.

Stefan's hand crawling around

on its own, right? It's just like that.

No.

Yeah, I didn't think so, either.

Tobias Dobson... I'm absolutely
losing my license over this...

- Just, please...
- Tobias Dobson picked up a prescription

three weeks ago for his
wife, Felicia, and it was

a prescription for...

penicillin.

BOTH: What?

- What is she...
- Ooh.

[WHISPERS]: Are you kidding me?

[EXHALES]

[GASPS] Oh.

Yes.

EarBods, okay.

And yet, nothing yet.

Okay. Oh, no.

I need the phone, right.

Oh, Todd.

Oh! [MUTTERS]

It's the blue, the ear.

Ear Me Now.

Yes, yes.

I'm sorry, maybe I'm just
anxious about the trial.

TOBIAS: No, don't you worry
about that, my darling.

It's all going to be fine.

I've taken care of everything.

FELICIA: What does that mean, exactly?

- "Taken care of"?
- Felicia.

It's none of your concern.

I have taken care of
absolutely everything.

[PHONE BUZZING]

What is that?

[WHISPERS]: They know.

TODD [ON PHONE]: Mom,
it was the brother.

Tobias Dobson k*lled his
brother Stefan with penicillin.

Stefan was gonna testify
about the warehouse collapse.

- Mom? Mom!
- Who is this?

[GASPS]

[WHISPERING]: Oh, my God.

♪ ♪

Yes, hello.

Looking for a "Todd Wright"?

Hi. Yes, sure.

Let's see, Todd Wright.
That will be Room 405.

[ALERT BEEPING]

Oh, oh, honey, honey, can you help me?

I'm trying to get her out of this chair,

over to that drinking fountain.

Thank you. God bless.

So, what do you want?

- Money?
- [CHUCKLES]

No, I don't want your money, Tobias.

I want to see you in the
slammer for k*lling your brother.

Did you really think
that no one would realize

that an allergic reaction was m*rder?

Huh? You thought you
could get away with this?

I am...

- getting away with this.
- Are you stupid or what?

That's dangerous. Stop
that! Don't do that!

Why would you do that?
Why would you do this?

Why would you do that?

Say hello to my brother.

[PHONE RINGING]

TODD: Hello, Tobias.

You just k*lled the wrong Todd Wright.

I'm across the hall, in Room 406.

[INDISTINCT P.A. ANNOUNCEMENT]

TODD: Hello.

Come on in.

[GRUNTS]

- We got him.
- We got him.

Oh.

Well, well, look who's here.

Now do you believe her?

We got here as soon as we
could. Is everything okay?

Yes, everything is perfect.

- You okay, d*ck?
- d*ck: I'm great, kid!

He tried to take me
out with the pain meds

just like you said he
would. You're all aces, kid.

You're on your way to becoming
Portland's best detective.

Yes.

Yes, I am.

A lone wolf.

[HOWLING QUIETLY]

You're under arrest for
the m*rder of Stefan Dobson,

for the attempted m*rder of Todd Wright.

You have the right to remain silent.

It's a good thing we
disconnected your morphine line.

- Otherwise, he could've k*lled you.
- Are you kidding me?

A little morphine ain't
gonna k*ll this old d*ck.

A bottle of scotch twice a day

has toughened up my system.

Two bottles of scotch a day? Dear God.

Thank you.

I'll be right back.

Excuse me, my deputies
planted this in his pocket.

And I think you will find the phrase:

"I am getting away with it"

a solid admission of guilt for trial.

- Thank you.
- Mm-hmm.

Hey, listen, sorry I
didn't believe you earlier.

I forgive you.

And was Tobias the one
bribing Judge Ortiz?

We don't know yet. It's complicated.

Part of a larger case. I
can't say much more right now,

but I'll have someone brief
you once it's all spun out.

- Okay.
- Well, thanks again.

Thank you.

Come on!

Margaret, this has simply been
the greatest night of our lives.

We loved every minute of it.

And we would love for
you to be our lawyer.

- Oh!
- I mean, if you can pull this off,

you can do anything.

Oh, ladies, thank you.

That makes me so happy.

Well... Oh.

But I have to tell you,

uh, that the commission rate at my firm

has recently gone slightly up.

- Oh, fine, fine.
- Oh, yes, of course.

- Anything.
- No problem.

MERRITT: Looks like you did it,
the Lee sisters are on board.

And at a three percent commission rate.

Impressive, but it's only
going to last us six months.

We're not out of the woods yet.

Thank you, Merritt.

Thank you for...

trusting me to reel them in.

- I've...
- [DIAL TONE SOUNDS]

[SIGHS]

[DIAL TONE CONTINUES]

[DIAL TONE STOPS ABRUPTLY]

- Here, sit down right here.
- Thank you.

There we go, all righty.

- [SIGHS]
- Okay, you know, uh, uh,

- uh, Todd, Todd? Okay.
- Yeah?

Put your feet up.

- There we go.
- Okay.

- Okay, here? There, okay.
- Okay, no, no.

- I'm okay, thank you.
- Aw.

You know, I guess I was Crest,
Folding and Wrong about you.

You can handle yourself.

Never should've doubted
Margaret Wright, PI.

And I should have trusted you.

I'm sorry.

- And, Todd?
- Hmm?

You were right...

about the firm.

We are in trouble.

And I am responsible for fixing it.

Okay.

But why didn't you tell me?

Well, uh...

probably because I didn't want to admit

to anyone else that it was true.

Discussing it makes it more real.

Mm.

And...

[LAUGHS]

I thought I could solve it all, but...

... these problems are bigger than me.

- I'm gonna need your help.
- Hey.

We're a team, come on.

Superman, Lois.

David, Maddie.

Oprah, Gayle.

So... how bad is it?

Well, I think the
construction of your helipad

is gonna have to wait a bit.

- And Todd?
- Hmm?

I'm the Oprah.