All the junk goes out.
Jo meets a couple teetering on the brink of divorce.
Don't snap at me! And tonight, they decide what to do.
Why haven't you cleaned this up yet?
And the answer will shock you.
No! Here!
Dad moved out eight months ago, and the confusion...
No, no, no, no, no! Has the kids acting out.
[Woman gasps]
[Girl] no!
They want to know why this is happening
I don't know why he really left.
And they want dad to come back home.
I really miss him.
Can jo help the family make it through this difficult time?
[Jo] decisions have to be made.
Now.
Will the kids behave? [Gasps]
[Woman] I don't understand why you're so mad all the time. Shut up!
Shut... Up.
Or is it too late? We have to split.
♪♪♪♪♪
♪♪♪♪♪
♪♪♪♪♪
♪♪♪♪♪
♪♪♪♪♪
♪♪♪♪♪
♪♪♪♪♪
♪♪♪♪♪
Here in sunny southern cali.
Let's take a look at the family that need my help this week.
Hi, we're the manley family.
I'm john manley. I'm sara manley,
And we have two kids--
Max, who is ... It's my birthday!
And claire, who is /. [Speaking indistinctly]
Sara and I have been separated
For about six months.
Hello, monster!
Since john moved out, things are difficult.
Ow! No, no, no, no, no!
Ow! Don't bite me! We still do the same things
That we did when we were together.
We still spend every weekend together.
We still have family dinner. They know that I leave every night.
And they constantly ask me to stay over.
Dad maintains the same lifestyle.
He just doesn't sleep there.
The kids have gotten a little more aggressive.
That hurts. Stop it.
You slammed her hand in the door. [Crying]
I think max, for a while, has felt a little bit abandoned.
I-i think he's angry that john comes and goes.
Oh! Max, I'm really starting to get irritated with you.
And I'm starting to get irritated with you.
I don't--i think he feels like he's not being heard
And his feelings aren't being acknowledged.
I don't understand why you're so mad all the time. Shut up!
Shut... Up.
You stop it. [Screams]
I hate you! John moving out has had a big impact on these kids.
That's understandable.
If you say "no" to claire,
She throws the biggest tantrum you've ever heard.
[Screaming, crying] she will just go on and on and on,
Till you give it to her.
No candy. Candy!
No! Candy!
I'm not doing much for discipline.
I just tend to walk away.
I have tried everything-- locked 'em in their room,
Go to your room. They don't stay in time-out.
Nothing's been working so far.
[Max] no! Stop being mean!
Shut... Up!
You guys haven't been behaving.
So when you-- shh, shh, shh.
I do feel very much like I'm in limbo,
'Cause I don't know whether he's gonna leave completely
And we're headed for divorce.
I don't know if he's gonna come home.
I'm at an impasse.
Do I stay? I don't know.
I'm at a loss right now.
It's not fair to sara. It's not fair to the kids.
It's not fair to me.
These adults need to make some decisions.
They really do.
Life can't stay the way it is right now.
Supernanny, if you can help us,
We really need your help.
Please come.
Emotional times, and unfortunately, very common,
But I'm gonna get you and your family through this.
♪♪♪♪♪
Because mom and dad are already separated,
I knew that going into this home
Was gonna be very different and challenging
Than some of the other families I've dealt with. [Doorbell rings]
Hi. Hello.
Pleased to meet you. I'm jo.
I'm sara. Nice to meet you. Hi.
Come on in.
This is jo. This is max.
Oh, hi, max. Pleased to meet you.
How are you? Good.
Good, and who's this? And this is claire.
Hi, pleased to meet you.
I really want to observe the interaction
Between yourself and the kids,
And obviously with john as well. Where is john? At work.
He'll be home around :. All right, brilliant.
So do what you normally would do. I'm gonna hang out. Okay.
And, uh, we'll see how it goes from there.
Great. All right.
Shortly thereafter, max and claire started acting
The way that they do and showing their true colors.
♪ Do, do, do! ♪ I will chase you. I will chase you.
Aah! [Sara] max, don't chase her.
[Claire cries] you need to respect the things
That are in your house. [Gasps]
No, no, no, no, no!
Max! Don't bite me.
Come on, that hurts.
I wasn't there long before I saw exactly how aggressive
Max can actually be towards his mother.
Ow! Ow, ow, ow, ow! Go.
I was glad that somebody else was seeing what I go through
On a daily basis. Please do not hit me with that.
It's... [Growls]
[Gasps] ow.
[Jo] and it's very confusing
For both sara and max,
Because there are no boundaries in place.
[Yells indistinctly] [gasps] ow.
Max wasn't the only one misbehaving.
That little claire can cause a storm as well
When she doesn't get her own way.
I just want to see it. No, we're done. Done. Ow.
I just want to see it! Ow! Ow.
I just want to see it!
Claire. Oh. Ow.
[Claire] no!
[Jo] she should be recognizing that max's behavior
Needs to be disciplined and so does claire's.
But she's not doing it.
No! No! [Screaming]
[Gasps] [claire screams, cries]
[Sara] go to your room.
Ow. [Cries] okay.
[Crying] no. No. No.
No! No. Let go. Let go.
I don't want to hurt you. [Rumbling]
[Sighs]
Okay, so explain this. This is time-out.
Is this what time-out is? This is time-out.
[Banging in room] okay, and how does that work?
It doesn't.
[Crying]
[Banging on door] the door.
After seeing sara's version of the time-out,
I knew when it came to teaching,
I'm would have to teach her how to do it properly.
[Yells, cries]
[Max] please!
[Jo] max was crying, and then sara started to cry.
I mean, it was a complete loss of what to do.
[Max crying] it's breaking my heart.
Just... Calm down, please.
[Screaming indistinctly]
[Jo] it was obvious that the separation
Was taking a serious emotional toll
On every member of this family.
Just let me out! [Crying]
[Sniffling] come here.
[Yells, sniffles] come here.
I just want you to stop fighting, okay?
I know. I'm not trying to hurt your feelings,
But you hurt mine. [Sniffles]
Okay?
[Claire crying]
After watching max's behavior, I really wanted to see
Whether he was aware of his own actions.
So when he settled by the computer,
I went over and had a word with him.
Well, I've been acting up since my dad left the house.
Oh, you have, have you? Why is that then?
I actually don't know.
[Claire yelling indistinctly]
The day he left, I asked him...
If he would tell me why he left,
But he never did.
Do you want to know?
I really do.
I want to know why he really left.
He has so many things going through his head,
So many questions that he wants answered.
And he's really very lost and confused right now.
Let me show you something. Come here with me.
I wanted to talk to max to find out exactly what it was like
In the house before his dad left.
If your mom and dad were in this living area here... Yeah.
And they were arguing, where was you and your sister?
Even if I was sleeping, I would normally wake up,
Go down where the argument was and stop it.
Yeah.
And--but it keeped happening every night,
Almost every night. Right.
He's being caught in the crossfire
Of his parents arguing frantically.
And my dad... Yeah.
He's not part of the family anymore.
Oh, that--and how does that make you feel? Then I go to bed.
I'm feeling a little s--
I'm not-- I'm not feeling so good.
Oh. What can I do here to help?
Well, can-- what would you like me to change?
Can--can you talk with my dad
And try to get him--
Try to get him ov-- back?
Because I really miss him.
[Jo] and I think I just felt a hairline fracture
In my heart as he said that
And a big lump in my throat.
Well, I can't promise you
That daddy's gonna come back into the house.
I know. I can't promise that.
That's something that mommy and daddy
Are gonna have to talk.
Yeah. But I know one thing.
I know that daddy loves you very, very much. Yeah.
Yeah.
Can I give you a big hug? Yeah.
'Cause I'd like to give you a really big hug.
Coming up on...
Emotions run high
When mom and dad think about their children.
Obviously, there's gonna be collateral damage
If I choose to walk away from this family.
And later, mom and dad decide
Whether to stay together or apart.
[Sara] I would like to try to have the family,
To have the joy, to have the love and respect
That--the reasons why we got married.
When "supernanny" returns.
[Jo] after what turned out to be a really emotional morning,
I thought it just would be best if we got outside the house.
So I suggested, "let's go run an errand."
Today would be great if we could go to the supermarket.
Okay.
That is usually someplace I dread going with them.
You two hold hands, please. No.
[Jo] apparently, it's horrendous for mom.
So I needed to see this.
Cupcakes. No cupcakes.
Cupcakes! Cupcakes! No cupcakes.
Cupcakes! Cupcakes! No, no, no, no, no!
Ow. Okay, no.
Max, no brownies! No, stop that!
No, no, no, no, no!
[Claire] oh! Don't, that'll fall.
[Claire screams] here! No!
No! I told you no!
[Sara] it was a nightmare.
Screaming, yelling-- I was so embarrassed.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no. No!
[Max] get her! [Claire laughing]
[Sighs]
I don't even know where they are now.
Hold on a minute. Your kids are gone? Yeah.
We're in the supermarket, and your kids are gone? They're gone.
So--so what are you doing? I'm looking for them.
Get over here now.
I got 'em from claire. Okay.
And then claire decided to stamp her feet and kick,
"I want! I want! I want!"
I like 'em! No, these--
No, I like 'em! Claire, they sat in the freezer for over a year!
No, I like 'em! But now I like 'em!
You cannot like them now. I like 'em now!
Every time we go to the market, she'll fixate on one thing
And scream until I give it to her.
[Sara] come on, pick something else.
No! I like 'em now!
[Jo] so you can come down this aisle if you want. [Sara] no, no, no, no, no!
[Claire] I'm not gonna get it! Yeah, you can come down this aisle.
It's--it's just a child's having a meltdown,
But feel free to get what you need to get if you're shopping. [Woman] oh, okay.
I found it absolutely hilarious that these people were shopping
And thinking, "oh, don't go down aisle six.
There's trouble down aisle six."
No, you--you already picked the ice cream. I don't want...
[Jo] it was a good experience to watch,
Because I know that I'm gonna be able to help sara change this.
Come on, get in, both of you.
♪♪♪♪♪
[Max and claire] daddy! Hey, monsters.
Dad walked in and the kids were so happy.
Hi, pleased to meet you. Jo.
Pleased to meet you. Hi.
And he was very pleased to see myself
And said "hi" and was very open and friendly.
If we are going outside,
Then you need to wear your shoes, okay?
He's fully committed, engaged
In spending that time with the kids
When he's back from work.
He says "hello" to sara. And it's kind of cordial,
But he's there because he's there to see his kids.
Okay, here we go--one...
[Yelling] two, three.
The kids out back with dad left me and sara in the house,
So I thought I could have this chat
About her circumstances with john.
So he comes over at this time when? Every day.
Every day at
Every day at :.Yeah.we have dinner. He helps with the bath...
[Claire] dada! Helps put them to bed, and then he goes.
How long has he been doing that then?
Eight months. So that's as long as you've been separate.
Yeah. So you both decided to...
No, he decided to.
He decided. So he decided that he wanted a separation,
Or that he needed to move out. What was--what's the story?
He never communicated to me during the marriage
How unhappy he was.
I really didn't see it coming.
I didn't know he was gonna move out.
And he moved out...yeah.
And then when I asked, you know, can we work on it?
Um, he was like, "I'll think about it."
Is it something that you want to work on? Of course.
So you still want to be married to john.
Right. I still love him very much.
Mm-hmm.i still respect him very much.
I think he's a wonderful father.
And I miss him terribly. You've seriously not spoke for eight months
About how you move forward?
I mean, for eight months, he's been... I've--
He's been in a separate place, and you've not had any...
I've tried to talk to him about moving forward,
But he is scared to-- he is--he's comfortable
Where it is right now, 'cause it's comfortable for him.
Sara was very open,
Talking about her relationship and the breakdown.
But of course there's two sides to every story.
So I went out back to speak to john to find out some more.
I had to walk away because I was at my wit's end.
I was angry more. Yeah.
I was more frustrated.
I took it out on the kids more. [Claire speaking indistinctly]
And they're--they're the innocent victims
In all this. Aah!
Uh... [Claire speaking indistinctly]
I have loved them from the day that they were born,
Uh, to this day now.
My biggest fear is that trying to not hurt them
Is the biggest challenge that I have.
[Jo] I was hoping to get a better explanation
Of why john had decided to move out,
But quite frankly, I was still confused.
It is important that he talks to sara
About where he wants to be,
Because she's walking on eggshells, hoping.
I'm gonna make a move then, for the evening.
Okay. And I really look forward to seeing you tomorrow.
Me, too. I really do.
Yeah. See you tomorrow.
Bye.bye-bye.
You know, it's really going to be a sensitive situation
Every day working with this family.
[John] now say "good night" and say "thank you" again.
[Claire] thank you again!
Thank you, and I'll see you tomorrow. You're welcome.
Okay, I'll see you tomorrow, john. Bye-bye.yeah.
I've helped families in this situation,
And a few families have divorced,
And a few families thought they wanted a divorce,
And they're still happily married.
But honestly, I'm not too sure how things are gonna pan out
Between john and sara.
♪♪♪♪♪
Let's start with max. Okay.
There is a lot of anger
That he is repeatedly showing,
And that's due to the fact
That he is not having
Questions answered. Right.
He wanted to know why you left, john.
And--and he sits there and--and he says to me,
"I-i-i don't know."
He's frustrated, and he--he's confused.
And the impact of that is his behavior--
You know, the punchin' and the hitting.
And he ends up pickin' on his sister and hurting her. Mm-hmm.
And then he retaliates, and he does that
With the pair of you as well.
It's not necessarily malicious.
It is--it is intentionally to draw attention to him.
He needs some direction
And guidance with boundaries,
And he's not receiving that. Okay.
Let's talk about claire. Okay.
She's realized that if she displays
Out-of-control behavior,
That it makes you fluster.
So she puts her foot down and she screams,
And she screams until she gets her own way. Right.
She'll just keep going
To where I just can't stand it anymore.
So I give up, and I give her what she wants.
That's behavior very quickly you could change,
But you continue
To support this behavior.
There are many issues that need to be resolved.
Unfortunately, there is
A very large elephant in the room,
And we're skirting around the elephant.
I don't know.
This whole limbo state is difficult on me,
And I think it's difficult on everyone.
But regardless of what's happening
In your own relationship at present,
You're both committed in raising your children together.
Absolutely. There's no shortage here of--of love
And how you both feel about your children. No. [Sniffs]
I just want to try to establish
Stability for myself,
For my children, for sara,
But with as little damage as possible.
Obviously, there's gonna be cler--collateral damage
If I choose to walk away from this family.
[Sniffles]
Right now these are tough times. Right.
Okay? But it doesn't mean
That we can't push through these tough times
In making sure that we have
Lots of positive things in place
That create stability
Regardless of circumstances.
So we're ready to create that foundation, right?
Yes. Yes.
Are you ready to do that together? Yes.
I would like that. Me, too.
All right, we need to make decisions
And we need to move on,
So let's make some way.
Coming up on...
I mean, I understand we both screwed it up.
Mom and dad's true feelings come to the surface.
If I say, "you know what,
Let's--let's drop the b*mb right now,"
That scares me to death.
And they will decide the future of their marriage...
Decisions have to be made.
When "supernanny" returns.
I gave john and sara the night to think,
Because I need to know what direction they're going in...
Hello.hello.
Good morning. Hi. Hiya.
And because it determines
What I'm gonna teach this family.
For eight months, you guys have chose
To be in a place that's not progressed.
Decisions have to be made now,
So that at least you guys can move on,
Not just as individuals, but as parents.
If I say, "you know what,
"Let's--let's drop the b*mb right now.
"Let's pull the trigger.
Let's move in our separate directions,"
That scares me to death,
Because I don't want to hurt anybody.
You know, I still love him, though.
And I would like to understand and realize what we had done
And put it behind us and try to have the family,
To have the joy, to have the love and respect
That--the reasons why we got married.
I mean, I understand we both screwed it up,
And I take responsibility for a huge part of that,
But I don't think you will make the choice
To just let your guard down and to try.
I don't feel that I can let my guard down, no.
This conversation
Is to establish what you both want.
At this stage of the game, it's--it's--
I think that the separation is the only thing
That I can go for.
I-i'm not--i'm not coming back as a husband.
I can't.
It's not working for me.
I'm--and you don't want to work on things.
The person that needs to work on me
In regards to you isn't-- uh, john, john, john--
She's asked you a question. No. There.
I can't fight anymore if that's your decision.
We have to split. I can't just...
You don't want the relationship anymore.
You don't want the marriage.correct.
♪♪♪♪♪
I don't even know what to say.
It's just--it's very difficult for me,
'Cause I had hope.
Right.
Then what I see... [Sniffles]
With regards to the work that I could do here
Is to really take you through that transition.
We're gonna need a conversation with the kids.
Okay.
John and sara told me that they had decided to divorce,
And straightaway my thoughts were on the kids.
No matter how hard this conversation's gonna be
For the pair of them, they've gotta tell the kids.
You know that mommy and daddy love you
Very, very, very, very, very very, very, very, very... [Claire speaks indistinctly]
To the tenth power much, right? Hmm-kay.
[Sara] mm-hmm. Shh.
At this time,
Mommy and I are not going to stay married.
But what we will stay forever
And ever and ever
Are your mommy and daddy.
We will never, ever leave you.
There's nothing that's ever happened
That has brought us to here has to do with you.
Truth is, is that mommy and daddy
Have made that decision to live in their separate houses,
But that you guys will have two homes.
Do you remember when we were talking, max,
And you said there were a few things that you didn't know,
And you wanted to ask daddy some questions. Yeah.
Well, now you could ask daddy those questions.
Hmm? Mm-kay, what questions do you have?
Do you remember?
Mm-kay, I moved out
Because I was trying to please everybody all the time.
And i-i was, except one person,
And that one person was me.
I gave so much that I didn't have any more to give.
John launched into this introspective conversation,
But I knew the kids wouldn't understand.
I mean, what they need from him
Is a conversation that's black and white.
The reason why daddy moved out
Is because daddy got on better with mommy
When they were living in separate houses.
Because when they're in the same house,
It's not good, is it?
No, they were fighting, and that makes us all feel really sad.
Today was the day that I faced
My biggest fear
And explained it to max and claire
That I was not coming back
As a husband,
But I will always be their father, their daddy.
And so what's important for mommy and daddy
Is that even though they're gonna be in different houses,
They're going to be together with you both.
I'm a little sad
Because my dad and mom are not together.
But they still really love me a lot.
And that was a tough conversation
For both sara and john to have with their kids,
But it was a lot lighter than how they thought
It was gonna turn out.
It seemed to leave the kids in a very comfortable place
About where they were gonna be in the mix of it all.
...tired. Oh, big hugs!
Big family hug! Big hug. Big family hug. Come on.
Big family hug. Big family hugs and kisses.
Coming up on...
Can jo turn dad's bachelor pad
Into a kid-friendly place?
Racks so they can put their stuff in would be great.
Put her on the chair... [Crying]i want--
And can mom take control when claire melts down? [Yelling indistinctly]
You're the mother of this house, okay?
When "supernanny" returns.
Divorce is difficult. There's no two ways around it.
But it's about parents creating
That stability for their children regardless.
And when I started teaching,
That's exactly what I was gonna be showing the manleys.
[Jo] sara and john!
So there needed to be two schedules,
Because these kids
Are going to be staying at their father's
As well as at home with their mom.
So as you can see, what we have here are--are kite schedules,
One for this house and one for your place as well, john.
What would be good is during the weekday,
To write down the schedule of what the kids do
When they come home, okay?
Because then we'll set that on your kite as well, dad.
Sameness is a beautiful thing
Because it lays down a carpet of stability for these children.
Keeping a routine on a daily basis is key
Between both homes. [Sara] we get a snack, homework.
The schedule was a little bit tough for me.
You know, it made it very, very official that we're separated
And splitting the children between us.
And max has to do minutes of reading...okay.
After homework. Do minutes reading.
But I'm glad that we were able to do it together
Without arguing.
And it made me feel very good
That we're on the same page.
So, kids, we're gonna be going
To daddy's place, okay,
Setting up home there
And making sure everything's nice and cozy.
I think it's rule number one
That if as parents you have decided to separate
And you have two homes, that it's important
To very quickly get your children settled
So they can feel secure and safe.
[John] claire, all the way up, please.
Going to his house made me realize
That he didn't spend any time there at all--
Very bare, certainly not cozy by any means.
They have a lot of areas to run around,
And keep themselves occupied.
He needs to create that homeyness,
So that the children are able to really feel
That it's their second home when they're with dad there.
[Claire] wow! After all,
It's not a bachelor pad, it's a family home.
There's great stuff that you can do...mm-hmm.
Some absolutely great stuff--racks...
Right.so they can put their stuff in will be great,
A desk for homework.
You know, slapping on those spongy sticker things.
Let's get busy.
[Jo] dad had a lot to do to make his place
More kid-friendly,
But I wanted to give him a little kick start,
So we've got a few little things to make his place more homey.
Here's all my stuff!
Where shall I put this one? Um, right--
Yeah.today I wanted to give him a little head start
By putting some posters up
And a little clock and some bedding,
Just to make it familiar for the kids.
Oh, my gosh, this is so great!
Those go on the mirror, I think.
I like daddy's house. It's just a start...
Well, it's a great start.
But actually, it's a good start, yeah.
It's a great start. Guys, what do you think of your bedroom?
Do you think it looks more cozy?yeah.
Yeah. It looks a lot better.
After max and claire had settled in nicely at dad's,
The next step for me was to teach
Both mom and dad discipline,
So they would be on the same page.
So we're gonna take these chairs here... [Sara] okay.
And we are purposely gonna use these chairs for discipline. Okay.
[Jo] I taught mom and dad how to do a proper time-out.
Giving them eye contact and giving them a warning.
Okay. Okay.
One minute per age of the child.
When they've done their time,
Tell them that you want an apology.
And no sooner had I taught mom the time-out... [Claire crying]
What's happening? Claire gave her
An excellent opportunity to use it.
Do you want this one or not?
No, I don't want the lined!
Then it's solved. If you don't want it--
Do not hit me.then--
Listen to me. Claire, you're going in time-out. [Crying] no!
I want the lined one!
Put her on the chair and explain.i want--
I want the lined one! You don't have the lined one--
I want the lined one! I put you in time-out, because I told you...
I want the lined one! You could not have the lined one.
Five minutes. But you offered me one!
Walk away. Walk away. You offered me one!
Pick her back up... I'm trying.
And put her back.
She's a little girl and she'll do as she's told.
Don't tolerate this behavior from her.
I was thinking, oh, my god, she's so angry.
And the more I was putting her in time-out,
The more--she got more angry.
And it was a little bit frightening. Mom!
Walk away. Will you stop?
Let's come over here.
What I would like you to do is to go back in there
Place her on that chair
And say nothing to her whatsoever
And go back to five minutes. Okay.
[Grunts, breathing heavily]
I want the lined one!
[Crying] but you offered me it!
[Sara] it was definitely a power struggle.
It was definitely a battle.
She did keep getting up... [Jo] walk away.
But jo just kept telling me to walk away,
And that's what I did. Mom did very well.
[Crying] but you offered me it!
She placed her back onto that chair.
She was very firm with her.[Sighs]
And then you panic, and you don't know how to control it at all, because you just--
I think she's off that chair.
There is no playtime.
It ended up working out. She eventually did it
And sat there and did her time-out.
Claire, I want you to apologize to mommy... Mommy--
Because you hit me. Sorry.
Okay.
I love you very much.
Later on in the afternoon when dad had to leave,
I wanted to teach mom a technique
That would allow her to go shopping in peace.
And I started by giving her green strips of paper
That represented the aisles
In her local supermarket.
And they will be responsible for placing what is necessary
Into your shopping cart. Perfect.
Now as you can see, each strip has a little hole here.
What you're going to do is put them
Onto your own... Hmm!
Handy shopping bracelet.
You're both gonna get one. All right, there you go. That is so cool!
[Jo] the idea of the grocery technique
Is to really help the kids get engaged.
Mom writes a shopping list out.
I want the ice cream.
Yeah, I'm sure you do. Cheese-- yep, it's dairy!
She's got bottled water. He's got soft drinks.
Okay, so put it on your wrists. Let's go.
Let's get it on, okay?
I've got it on! All right, let me get my purse.
All right, let's get a big basket.
Number one--bottled water.
Aisle number one-- let's find that one.
Okay.
Claire? [Claire] what?
We need big tomatoes, big head of lettuce
And a big orange, okay? You like that one?
Where's lettuce? Is it over there?
Massive difference from what we first saw--
I mean, we've gone from kids pushing over shopping carts,
Running off in the supermarket
To today, them helping out mom
And getting the job done-- simple!
Do you like being in charge of getting stuff? Yeah!
The aisle game does make
The, um, grocery store less boring.
♪ We each get aisles at the grocery store ♪
[Sara] whoo! That feels fantastic.
Wow!
I am going away for a few days.
I'm looking really forward to coming back
And just seeing you guys build on the techniques.
I'm a little apprehensive about going through this alone
Without jo right behind me telling me what to do.
[Sara] thank you. Take care, kids. You're welcome.
I'll see you when I get back. Bye, jo.
Bye-bye.thanks again. See you in a couple days.
[Sara] bye, jo. I'll see you when I get back. You shall do. Bye-bye.
Coming up on "supernanny"... No!
Mom tries to keep max in line without jo. [Yelling]
And the claws come out... Why haven't you cleaned this up yet?
You have all the time in the world.
When mom and dad throw max a birthday party...
That's brilliant! You're so smart.
When "supernanny" returns.
After three days away,
I was rather anxious to see how the parents
Were making it through this emotional transition
And whether they were making progress was well.
Okay, so without further ado,
We are gonna start to look at these clips
And see how hard you guys have been working.
[Max yells indistinctly] no.
You are not allowed to talk to me like that, max.
You are in time-out. No!
No!
Ow! Ow!
[Crying] ow! No!
[Yelling]
[Speaking indistinctly]
[Growling]
[Beeps]
I put you in time-out because I asked you
To stay in your room and play in your room
And not spread your toys out.
And you back-chatted me.
Okay? Can you apologize to me, please?
Okay. Go have fun and play in your room.
Go on.
I-i've got to say, sara-- absolutely beautiful.
You gave a very strong warning.
You followed through.
You did the steps of the technique correct.
You set the timer.
You remained calm and composed.
And you got the results there.
I'm very proud. I'm really, really proud.
Thank you.
Let's move on to the next clip here.
[Sara] but I need this filled up. Okay.
Well, how filled do you want these filled?
Full? Half full? / Full?
Well, they--what they need to do-- /?
/? Talking!
/? Can you be more specific except, "fill them"?
No, actually, john, I can't. [Groaning]
Yeah, okay.
Well, why don't you bring the buckets over here,
And I can just fill 'em up? I'm going to.
I'm just trying to figure this out, if you don't mind.
Don't snap at me! I thought we had three of these--
Why haven't you cleaned this up yet? [Scoffs]
You have all the time in the world.
All this stuff is going in your garage.
Now that you have moved out, all the junk goes out,
And I can actually put my car in here.
Because you put water balloons--put water in that,
Because--i won't explain it to you, but...
Okay, where's-- why? Why won't you explain it to me?
I'm obviously gonna be alone where I'm gonna need to do
These water balloon things without a man around.
You put the water in the bucket
Because it helps displace the weight of the balloon.
The balloon is round. Oh, so they float,
Instead of stacking on one another and breaking.
That's brilliant! You're so smart.
[Blows whistle] [jo] oh, dear. The two of you--serious.
Oh, my word!
Sarcasm--your sense of humor with one another--
Oh, deary me,
Please! Please!
Unnecessary, really, right? Right.
She started it. Being a pain in the backside to the pair of you.
You guys are, you know, moving forward
In--in communicating with one another
Without hostility, okay?
And it creates an under-tension, really.
But if you see one of you
Being a pain,
Then, you know, blow the whistle on it.
Say, "hey, you know what?
Look--what we're doing here" mm-hmm.
"This is our son's birthday party."
Things can turn sour pretty quickly if we don't. Mm-hmm.
So we'll leave our egos at the door. Okay.
All right. Yes.
Sorry. Sorry.
I've seen some marvelous results here on discipline,
But what I would like to see
Is more communication between the pair of you,
Because you guys are in two separate homes,
And you've got two beautiful kids.
And how you move forward
In making those choices together
In raising your children
Is what's gonna raise these kids to well-adjusted adults.
Yeah. That's what we want.
All right, so let's get cracking today with some more hard work
And let's tie up some loose ends.
All right? Yes.
Okay, thank you very much. Coming up on...
The manleys spend quality time together,
But will a tantrum spoil the fun?
Give me my hat! I'm giving you a warning.
If you continue, I'm gonna put you in time-out right now.
When "supernanny" returns.
Before moving home,
Have your toddlers pack their favorite things
Into a separate little suitcase--
Like p.j.s, cuddly toys, blankies.
It will help them have their most-loved treasures at hand
And help them feel more secure
On their first night in a new environment.
John and sara have committed
To going out on family outings, even after they're divorced.
So we went on a trip to santa monica pier
To see exactly how it would go.
Okay, so let's stay focused and light.
Let's enjoy the day today, and let's have some fun.
Okay, you want to have fun?
We hadn't been at the pier long before max started to play up,
And I was curious to see
If mom was gonna step in and take control.
Come on, let's go have fun.
Let's go have fun. Come on.
I don't know. He's all of a sudden decided
He's gonna be in a bad mood.
Huh? Listen to me. This is a warning. Do you hear me?
Let go! Don't do that to me.
[John] hurry up. Get...
We've got a great day here.
Let's continue on and see what else can happen, okay? [Whines]
I want--no. Max...
Because--yeah. That behavior is totally unacceptable.
You getting angry right now is completely unacceptable.
Give me my hat! I'm giving you a warning.
If you continue, I'm gonna put you in time-out right now.
Snap out of it. Let's have fun.
Mom jumped straight in there and let max know
That she wasn't gonna stand for this.
And he knew she meant business, and he cleaned up his act.
What are we doing next? What are we doing next?
What did you want to do? Breaking plates.
You want to break plates.
I would like to break some plates, I think, as well.
All right, mommy and max, go and break some plates then.
Let's go break some plates!
Can I do it, too?
If they misbehave,
They will be in a time-out at an amusement park
Or in the market or, you know, anywhere.
Well done!
You dealt with that, snapped him out of it, which is great,
You know, and as soon as he started,
You nipped it in the bud. That's what I'm talking about!
[Sara] you don't want to break plates?
I don't need to break plates.
[Jo] I realized that john wasn't participating very much,
So later on when we were down by the beach,
I encouraged him to have some fun with his son.
Hitch up the shorts, jump into his world.
He's running to the waves, and he's running away.
Jump into his world. Okay.
Okay.[Jo] all right, you guys want to do a thumbs-up.
[Groans]trust me, I won't do it again.
I saw the connection that he had with me.
And he enjoyed that experience
When I was in the water next to him.
And it was one of those days
That I wished it would have lasted longer,
Because these moments were going so well.
[Yelps] oh, that's so cold!
[Jo] max was able to have a lot of fun with his dad,
Because john chose to let his hair down and have some fun.
This water is cold!
[Max shrieks]
So am i!
When we went to the pier,
It was really, really fun.
It was fun because we were all together as a family.
[John] whoa, big wave, big wave, big wave, big wave!
It was only through jo's inspiration
And prodding
That, uh, I was able to have that memory
That I will keep for a very long time.
[Sara] towels are in the car. [John] okay.
♪♪♪♪♪
[Jo] so I am going. [Sara] now?
They will inspire other parents
Who are in this difficult circumstance
To push through like they've done as well.
I was very pleased to see you
Be very, very well-behaved in the supermarket.
Bye, jo jo.
[Claire speaks indistinctly]
Bye-bye, darlin'.
[Max] jo made my family a better family.
I'm really glad that jo came.
[Laughs]
Take care, okay? Okay.
I know that, given the tools that we have been given,
That sara and I will apply the practices,
And that this experience--
It will be with us the rest of our lives.
And sara--mwah!
I am very grateful for this experience.
Keep up with that marvelous work.
Okay. Seriously,
You should be very proud of yourself... I am.
Very proud of yourself.
Amazing. Amazing.
The manley family
Are gonna have their own emotional rollercoaster to ride,
But I've certainly given them tools
To help them progress forward,
So that they build better lives for themselves
And for their children.
♪♪♪♪♪
[John] whoa!
Whoa! Now it's getting fast!
[Sara] whoo! Whoo!
[Sara and claire laugh]
I'm going backwards!
Good job! Yeah!
[Man] ho, up right over here, right here...
[Sara] throw it up there. Ohh.
[Man] ooh! [Sara] oh, oh!
[Laughter]
[Sara] ...keep her feet in.
[Claire speaks indistinctly]
[Laughter]
Whoo! [Jo] look at that!
Mommy's down. Daddy's down.