02x01 - The Show Mustn't Go On

[bunniefuu]

[upbeat music playing]

[chomps]

[expl*sive burp]

[sniffs]

[glass breaks]

-[James] Ah! Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah!
-[Max] Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, ah!

[loud expl*si*n]

See? Everything worked out.

[loud crash]

[James laughing]

Aww, I wanna be a letter!

[burps]

[revolutionary drum and flute]

[squishy b*at boxing]

[rapping]
♪ Iconic stance, a gift from France ♪

♪ To our fledgling nation ♪

♪ All green, made of copper ♪

♪ Call that oxidation! ♪

Who knew history could be so catchy?

Ugh. That's all I can say. Ugh.

Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa.

You didn't like "Lady L?"

What was to like?

It was awful.

James has an unpopular opinion
and thinks he can say it out loud!

James is broken...

He doesn't know art.

It's not his fault!

He just doesn't get it!

It's okay. Aww, it's okay.

-Poor soul.
-Yeah, he doesn't get it.

[petulant groaning]

You think I don't get it?

I'm the only one who does get it.

You only like it because of the hype.

Lady L isn't even a real person!

She's a statue!

[gasping] Liar!

[heartbroken weeping]

You really don't like it?

I'm sorry, Max, but even I
could make some catchy tunes

everyone would fall in love with

like a bunch of bandwagoning,
lemming-people.

Lemmeople!

We prefer plemmings.

Care to put your money
where your food hole is?

A hundred bucks says
you can't pull it off.

A hundred bucks?

That's like 10,000 fountain pennies.

Hmm, 10,000 fountain pennies.

That's like 10,000 stolen wishes.

Hmm.

A chance to win your money and teach all
these plemmings who they really are?

Heh! You're on!

I'm making a musical!

Sweet!

Can I get preview tickets?

Please?

[money jingling]

[scanner bleeping]

All right. Say goodbye to your cash.

But how are you
gonna make a musical, James?

There's lights and sets and dogs.

No, no, wait.

I think it's CATS.

Oh, my sweet, scaly Max.

I don't have to actually make a musical.

To prove my point,

all I have to do is create
the idea of a musical and hype it up.

Did you just say hype?

I'm in!

First, we'll need a boring
historical figure to base my musical on.

-[eagle screams]
-[patriotic drumming]

Hmm... Alexander... Constitution?

Uh, no. No one can
make a rhyme out of that.

Uh... Franklin!

Everyone knows him!

♪ Lightning, keys
It's all I need ♪

Ha-ha.

Oh, you're in trouble now.

Am I?

'Cause unless you've got some
secret budget

and dedicated marketing team
that I don't know about,

no one's gonna know your musical exists.

It doesn't exist.

Yeah, I know, Max.

Thanks for tracking that for me.

I don't need a marketing team.

Dirt has influencers.

"Franklin.

Sold out due to extreme popular demand.

Oh, and there's rhymes."

Ooh, I want to see it!
I want to see it!

Tell me how I can see it!

Watch and learn.

Here we go again.

Hello, influencers.

I just wanted to tell you
all about

"Franklin: A Historical Musical"

[sniffs]

It's put on by a director
that's so indie, so underground,

that you've probably
never even heard of him.

Ha. People I've never
heard of are the best. Ha.

You've got to be kidding me.

Ever hear of Biff Granwell Bonanza?

Do you know what he's talking about?

Yeah. It's actually pronounced
Biff Gran-well Bonanza.

Yeah, I already knew that.
It's all over social media.

I just wanted to make sure
you knew it too.

Hashtag blessed. Ha-ha.

Where can we get tickets?

Go to this website and enter
the preview code "plemmings."

Mm-mm, not before me!

Ha! Got the ticket.

Celebration selfie.

[ding]

This isn't over.

Yes!

Look at all the tickets I've sold for
Franklin's opening night tomorrow.

Ha. The hype worked!

Nothing gets plemmings
to jump on the bandwagon

like smug influencers.

Huh. I can't believe
how much they spent

on a musical
that doesn't exist.

Doesn't exist?

But I paid three times
face value for my tickets!

Winner. Me. Money. Now.

You know selling people
a nonexistent thing is fraud, right?

And if you shove it in
everyone's face to win our bet,

you'll be admitting a crime
and get arrested.

Not delivering something
you promised is a crime?

Yes!

I can finally go after
my pizza delivery guy

for messing up my order.

Forget my kale, you go straight to jail!

Pfft. Please.

I'll just put on
"Franklin: The Musical" for real,

so it won't be fraud
and I won't go to jail.

And I'll make it so bad

that everyone will see
how stupid they were

to believe all the ridiculous hype,

still proving my point!

Your $100 of
hard-scammed money is gonna be mine!

All right.

[pops]

So how's the piece
of garbage going?

It isn't!

I'm just too brilliant to write garbage!

Listen to this!

Ah!

[recorded beatboxing]

♪ Lightning! Lightning!
Key! Key! ♪

♪ Lightning! Key! ♪

[beatboxing stops]

[mic feedback]

Ah!

See?
That's the worst I could do lyrically!

And it's amazing.

I think I'm a genius.

[burrito-full laughter]

Sorry.

It's just...

Pfft! [cackling]

[guffawing]

Huah!

Huh... Okay.

Phew.

How exactly does your genius
help you win our bet?

After experiencing the musical masterclass
I'm about to put on,

all the plemmings will finally see
what a good musical is,

and realize I was right all along
about "Lady L" being trash.

Ha!

You and what cast?

Unless of course your "genius"
enough to play all the roles yourself.

Don't be absurd.

But you're right, I need to cast actors.

But James, if you hold auditions, then...

Everyone will know I made Biff up.

Unless...

the auditions are run
by Biff Granwell Bonanza!

Huh?

Hello.
My name is Biff Granwell Bonanza.

Director.

Auteur.

Genius.

[camera snaps]

[awed applause]

I'll bet some of
you are wondering

why we're having
auditions now for a show

that's successfully toured the globe,
the International Space Station,

and is opening here tonight.

I fired them.

I fired all the actors.

And I'll probably fire you.

But hey, let's see what you've got!

[clapping]

Now, let's see some acting.

-[buzzer blaring]
-Next!

-[buzzer blaring]
-No!

-[buzzer blaring]
-Pass!

-[buzzer blaring]
-Awful!

But I haven't even sung yet.

[clears throat]

♪ Lightning
Lightning ♪

♪ Key
Key ♪

♪ Ben Franklin is angling
To make history ♪

♪ Gon' teach y'all
'Bout elec-tricity ♪

♪ With a lightning, kite... ♪

[rock-opera vocal riff]
♪ And key! ♪

[applause]

-[appreciative cheers]
-Yeah, go McFly.

Wah!

Man, McFly is so talented, he
can even make this garbage good.

Outstanding.

You were wonderful.

But I've realized
there should only be one role.

The role of Franklin.

And that role should be played by me,
Biff Granwell Bonanza.

[gasping]

Injustice.

[disgruntled chatter]

[weeping]

One role, plus the part of Lightning!

Max, bring your trash can!

[gasping]

Aw, heck yeah! [laughing]

You realize lightning
doesn't make a sound, right?

Which makes it an artistic choice.

Man, I'm actually good at this.

Oh, James,
I think you've really lost it.

There is no James, only Biff.

[slaps]

Not gonna call you that.

Well, you should.

Because this is who I really am.

[snaps]

I have always been Biff deep down.

And I'm about to singlehandedly give

the most beautiful,
dramatic, poignant send-up

to one of the greatest men in history,

who sacrificed everything to teach us
not to put our keys on kites.

Huh?

[opening night orchestration]

Uh, the number one.

Actually, the number two.

On second thought, the number one.

Uh, no wait, the number two.

[panicked huffing]

Ah!

Why I oughta...

-[crowd murmuring]
-[someone snoring]

Phew... This is it.

Once they watch my musical masterpiece

and are left sobbing in their chairs over
the tragic genius that is Franklin,

they'll see they were
wrong about Lady Lib.

That the artist formerly known as James
was right.

And Echo's money will be mine.

[tapping touchscreen]

[lights clacking off]

[phone tapping]

[presentational opening chords]

Shh.

[whispering] Franklin,

Franklin,

Franklin,

Franklin.

[rapping]
♪ How does an old man with glasses ♪

♪ Bored but absorbed ♪

♪ With inventions think
"How can I get some attention?" ♪

♪ I have a kite and a key, key ♪

♪ Any ideas for me, me? ♪

[patriotic drum and fife playing]

[stifled laughter]

Ha, ha, ha, ha...

Hmm, must be
looking at their phones.

♪ First name Benny
Last name Frank ♪

♪ He's someone that
You all ought to thank ♪

♪ 'Cause he took that kite
And he took that key♪

♪ And used them to discover electricity ♪

♪ With science ♪

♪ Physics ♪

♪ Science... theories ♪

♪ Science... experiments ♪

♪ And meteorology ♪

[girl's unrestrained,
distinctive laughter]

Grr!

[girl's laughter continues]

Echo?

I should have known she'd try
and sabotage me when she saw my genius.

Well, she can't sabotage this!

Hmm!

♪ The sky was dark ♪

♪ A storm was brewing ♪

♪ But Benny Frank knew what he was doing ♪

♪ Benny was scared
As the thunder clapped ♪

♪ The electrical current might
Give him a heart att*ck ♪

[heart b*ating]

[thuds]

[oafish, full-voiced laughter]

Echo brought friends?

Wait, she doesn't have any friends.

♪ But Benny was strong ♪

♪ "I don't care if this is frightening!" ♪

♪ He stood up and he said
"Bring it on, lightning!" ♪

Did someone say "Lightning?!"

[banging tail on trash bin]

[crowd laughter]

[whispering]
Go to the end!

The funeral scene!

Painful.

[Max]
Sorry!

[fog machine sighing]

[crowd]
Ooh!

♪ Ben taught us about lightning
He taught us about class, class, class ♪

♪ He was the master of smartness
And master of sass, sass, sass ♪

♪ He invented swim fins
He invented bifocals, bifocals ♪

♪ First Post Master General
So your mail is more than local, local ♪

[grunting and farting in effort]

♪ On his death bed, in his last secundo
On his death bed, in his last secundo ♪

♪ He said put my head
On a hundred dolla' ♪

♪ Put my head
On a hundred dolla' ♪

♪ Put my head
On a hundred dolla' ♪

♪ Hundo! ♪
[echoing]

[cough]

[slow-clapping]

[applause intensifies]

[clapping squishily]

Huh?

All right, time to watch the trainwre...

Oh, it's over.

Wait... they liked it?

[appreciative finger snaps]

Best. Comedy. Ever!

Huh? Excuse me?

Seriously, when he got electrocuted.

Oh, I love ironic slapstick comedy.

No! It wasn't an ironic slapstick!

Franklin isn't a comedy!

It's art!

Real art with heartfelt passion!

How can you not see it?

You don't get it!

Who's this guy?

Oh, sad, he doesn't recognize
the comedic genius of Biff's work.

And there is no
Biff Granwell Bonanza!

It's me!

James!

Aww! No Biff?

[swooning]

I made up Biff to try and trick you all
for a bet I made with Echo!

Please.

You could never make up
someone as genius as Biff.

Hey!

Lady Lib's doing a secret show
down the street!

Yeah.

-Yeah.
-I'm out!

-Lady Lib.
-Oh, Lady Lib rocks.

[lights clacking off]

Plemmings!

All of you!

You wouldn't know quality theater if it
struck you like lightning striking a kite!

-Yeah, yeah.
-Nom!

Horrible.

Pay up.

I don't have any money.

I spent it all on the musical.

That's cool.

I also accept teeth.

[Birdie servoing and drilling]

Oh. Wait!

Wait, wait, wait!

Wait! Hold on.

Hold on a sec.

Wait! Hold on!

Hold on!

-Ah!
-[toothy drilling]

[emphatic beatboxing]

Gritada!