01x30 - Home Sweet Homer

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "DuckTales ". Aired: September 18, 1987 - November 28, 1990.*
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While Huey, Dewey, and Louie originated in Donald Duck animated short subjects in the 1930s, their characterization on DuckTales approximated that of Barks' comics.
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01x30 - Home Sweet Homer

Post by bunniefuu »

Life is like a hurricane

Here in Duckburg

Racecars, lasers, aeroplanes

It's a duck blur

You might solve a mystery

Or rewrite history

- DuckTales
- Ooh, ooh, ooh


Every day they're out there
making DuckTales


Ooh, ooh, ooh

Tales of derring-do,
bad and good luck tales


- D-d-d-danger
- Watch behind you


- There's a stranger
- Out to find you


What to do?
Just grab on to some DuckTales


Ooh, ooh, ooh

Every day they're out there
making DuckTales


Ooh, ooh, ooh

Tales of derring-do,
bad and good luck tales


Ooh, ooh, ooh

Not ponytails or cottontails

- No, DuckTales
- Ooh, ooh, ooh


Ah, Treasure Island. Ha ha ha.
I never get tired of it.


Let's see. What shall I read next?
Something by a great writer.

Uncle Scrooge!
Look, Uncle Scrooge!

A letter from Uncle Donald!

Not heavy reading, but a pleasure.

Ha ha ha ha ha.

He sent some pictures, too.

Ahem. "Dear nephews..."

Hmm. No mention of Uncle Scrooge?

"Today we began naval exercises...

"off the eastern coast of the Sea of Tuna.

I spent most of the day
in one of the Navy's newest jet fighters."


"I was taking a good close look
at its top-secret jet engine


"when word came the admiral
wanted to see me the minute I was free.


"Thought you'd get a kick
out of a picture I took of the admiral.

"I get a kick out of him almost every day.

Love, Uncle Donald."

Here's the picture he's talking about,
Uncle Scrooge.

Ha ha ha. I'm sure the admiral has never
had a sailor quite like your uncle Donald.

That's for sure!

What's this?

What's wrong, Uncle Scrooge?

Wrong? Ha ha!

Your Uncle Donald has done something
right for a change! By accident, of course.

- What do you mean?
- In the background of this picture.

I think it's the sea passage
to the lost city of Ithaquack!

Ithaquack?

Ithaquack was built by Ulysses,
the great adventurer,

where the colossus
of Duckapopolous once stood.

The great statue is gone now, but look
at those strangely shaped boulders.

- They're feet!
- Just like the statue's.

This is the passage.
I'm sure of it!

My flagship is too big to fit through.

We'll need to take my sailing yacht.

The great Ulysses himself sailed
these waters over 3,000 years ago.

He built his palace
right in the middle of Ithaquack

so he and all the other kings after him
could be close to their people.

Where is King Homer?

When is he going to rid us of Circe?

Ulysses wouldn't
hide in the palace like a coward!

Hmm.
The mob has a good point.

I haven't seen Homer around for days.

I wonder what the little wimp is up to.

I should have crushed
that little twerp long ago.

But now I'm the ruler of Ithaquack.

I'm the one they'll tell stories
about throughout history!

You've come a long way, baby!

Peek-a-boo Pool, find the little fool!

Heekus-peekus!

Well! Homer, trying to slip away
in a little boat to find help, eh?

You've got more backbone that I thought.

I should have turned you into a pig
when I had the chance!

I know! My time-twister spell!

I'll send you to another time where any help
you find will be as useless as you are.

Ring, rang, rhyme!

Send King Homer to a distant time!

Oh, no! You stupid... Aah!

Great Ulysses! Such a storm
could only be the work of Circe!

Help!

There it is, Uncle Scrooge!
The passage to the lost city of Ithaquack!

U-U-Uncle...

Uncle Scrooge!

Lower the sails,
or they'll be torn to shreds!

Uncle Scrooge,
it's the colossus of Duckapopolous!

I-I think it's over.

The colossus of Duckapopolous
is just like you said it was, Uncle Scrooge.

Help me! Please help!

There he is!

Let's get him onboard immediately!

Something very strange is going on.

Ah, this is all your fault, fur face!

I meant to send Homer into another time,
but because you've disrupted my spell,

I've brought someone
from another time to him! Ohh!

Hocus-porkus!

Now scram, before I decide
to have pork chops for dinner!


This is disastrous.

Yeah. Baseball hasn't
even been invented yet.

And neither has ice cream.

Neither has school. Ha ha ha.

I must get you boys back to your own time.
If you are really the nephew of Ulysses,

you must have some idea
of how this happened.

All I can say is, such magic can only be
the work of Circe's magic medallion.

Magic medallion? Very well.

Take me to Circe.

You would face Circe?

Aye. I read all about her
in the stories about your uncle Ulysses.

If he could handle her, so can I.

You, then, are the brave
and powerful one I've been searching for.

Well, ha ha ha ha ha,

I do have a lot of spunk, some say.

But so should you, lad.
Your uncle wasn't afraid of that witch.

And neither is our uncle.
Right, Uncle Scrooge?

Right, boys. We'll show that witch
who's boss around here.

Boy, when I grow up,
I'm gonna be just like Uncle Scrooge.

You can't grow up
to be like Uncle Scrooge.

I'm gonna grow up
to be like Uncle Scrooge!


Face it, guys. None of us
can ever be as rich or as smart

or as brave as Uncle Scrooge!

Except maybe me.

Keep an eye
on those cliffs, boys.

Ha ha ha.
I have them just where I want them!

It's time I cut Ithaquack off
from the outside world entirely!

I've been saving this one
for just such an occasion.

Ha ha!

Ancient passage to other lands,
come together as I close my hands.

Wh-What's that?

Uncle Scrooge, the cliffs!

They're moving!

We're in the middle!

We'll never get through in time.

My beautiful yacht will be
crushed like an eggshell!

- We need more speed! The motor!
- What's a motor?

Abandon yacht!

Well, that took the wind out of their sails!

Ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Ah... ah... ah...

Ah-choo!

- What was that?
- A monster!

Ah... ah...

Ah-choo!

Oh...

He's not a monster.

He has a monster sneeze, though.

Who are you?

The name's McDuck.
Who are you, sir? And where are we?

I'm... King Blowhard,
and this is... is...

Ah-choo!

My home.

King Blowhard?
Well, I remember you.

You helped my Uncle Ulysses
on his odyssey.

Ya ya ha, ha ha!

You jest!

You're too scrawny
to be a nephew of Ulysses!

He was a mountain of a man!

Yeah, I know.
I'm more of a hill.

Why, it's like it was yesterday.

Ulysses' ship sank in a mighty storm.

It lies at the bottom of this very cove.

Yeah. If only it could rise from the sea
and carry us to Ithaquack.

If only I could stop sneezing.

Maybe something on this island
is making you sneeze.

Like the flowers on those bushes.

The delicious umma-gumma fruit?

Yeah, you might be allergic
to the pollen on the flowers.

Pollen?

Nah!

Ah... ah...

Ah-choo!

Yup, you are allergic.

Just get rid of the fruit, and you'll be OK.

Help us raise Ulysses' ship,
and we'll take all the fruit with us.

I think I can help you out.

Stand back, or you'll be blown away.

My uncle's ship! We can repair her
and be bound for Ithaquack in a few days!

It's not a yacht, but it'll do.

Boy, these umma-gummas are tasty!

Uh-oh. We're nearing
the Island of the sirens.

We must find cover our ears.
We mustn't hear them singing!

Them? Singing?

What could be so harmful
about a little singing?

Pennies, nickels, quarters, dimes

Come to us while there's still time

Golden ducky, ever bold

Look into our eyes of gold

Eyes of gold!
Why, it's music to my ears!

Uncle Scrooge!

- Pennies, nickels, quarters...
- He's been enchanted!


Come to us while there's still time

Golden ducky, ever bold

Look into our eyes of gold

Pennies, nickels, quarters, dimes

I'll come to you just in...

Aah!

Wow, what's that?

It's the monster's tongue.

No wonder he can hit those high notes.

Ha ha ha ha!

Here's a taste of your own medicine!

Your uncle is coming
out of the sirens' trance.

Pennies, nickels, quarters, dimes

Come to us while there's still...

Uhh! Ever have a song you just
couldn't get out of your head?

We mustn't get
too near the whirlpool.

Once pulled in, no ship has ever
made it out. See that cave in the cliff?

That's where the monster
Yuckalinda sleeps.

We must be very quiet.

Ah-choo!

What has awakened Yuckalinda?

Ah ha ha!

Lunch! Ah ha ha ha ha ha!

- Whoa!
- Watch out for the whirlpool!

Whoa!

- Here she comes again.
- And here we go again!

Eat this, lizard breath!

Ohh! Lunch!

Huh?

Good lunch!

Well done, Huey.
Get ready to feed her the main course.

But the whirlpool has us.
We're lost!

Quick, hand me that rope!

More lunch!

Yaah!

We did it!

Next stop, Ithaquack,
and the arms of my fair queen Ariel.

Escaped again!

The old one must be a powerful sorcerer.

I'll have to be sneakier than usual.

Don't you dare harm Homer, or I'll...

You'll do nothing, Queen Ariel,
except maybe wallow in the mud.

Hocus-porkus!

Now, to set a trap they can't escape!

Hocus-jokus.

Welcome home, sweet Homer.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha.

We must be careful.
Circe may be lurking anywhere.

Can we come, too, Uncle Scrooge?

No, lads. Not until I put Circe in her place.

Homer, my darling, welcome home!

Ariel, my queen, this is my friend Scrooge.

We have escaped crashing cliffs,
storms, and monsters

so that he might rid us of wicked Circe.

Your friend must have powerful magic
for you to have survived so many hazards.

Ah, hazards don't bother me.
I thrive on them, like the great Ulysses did.

- Oh!
- But magic?

No, I don't know a single magic trick.

Ha ha ha ha.
Don't need them.

Is that so?
Just what I wanted to know.

Hocus-jokus!

Circe! What did you do with Ariel?

Allow me to show you.
Hocus-porkus!

Now see here, you wicked little...

As for you... Hocus-porkus!

What? Huh? Huh?

Ha ha ha!
I love my work!

Uncle Scrooge and Homer
sure have been gone a long time.

Homer said he was taking
Uncle Scrooge to his palace.

This must be the place.

Look, that pig's wearing
Uncle Scrooge's top hat and glasses.

And that one's wearing
Homer's gold chain.

Uh-oh. I get the feeling
that pig is Uncle Scrooge!


- Must have been that witch again.
- Come on, let's find her!

We better take Uncle Scrooge.

But how? We don't have a leash.

Maybe he'll follow food.
I mean, he is a pig.

Uh, how about some cabbage,
Uncle Scrooge?

It's as crisp and green as... as...
brand-new dollar bills!

Yep, that's Uncle Scrooge, all right.

You better stay here, Uncle Scrooge.

- She's asleep.
- No kidding!

Uncle Scrooge, is that you?

What? What?

What's the meaning of this?

My medallion!

What's your hurry?

Why don't you stay for a spell?

Huey, Louie, down-and-out
pass pattern 21! Hike!

Careful! You'll break it!

She's really worried
about us breaking this thing!

Then break it!

No!

Meow. Meow!

Oh! You've ruined everything!

Every...

Huh?

- Ariel?
- My love?

It's the magic storm that brought us here!

It's after us again!

Boys, are you in here?

Run, Uncle Scrooge, run!

Aah!

Run, boys!

- Aah!
- Aah!

Aah!

Whoa!

I-I wish I could say it's nice to be back.

How do we know
we're back in our own time?

Castaways off starboard beam,
Admiral Grimitz!

Why, it's three young boys.

And a rascally looking old duck
wearing a top hat?

What?

Prepare to... ugh!

It's them!

Aah!

That looks like
Uncle Donald's ship!

Sounds like it, too.

I wonder if Homer grew up
to be like his uncle Ulysses.

Well, young people usually
grow up to be themselves.

Gee, we were hoping to grow up
and be like you, Uncle Scrooge.

Ha ha ha ha. Now, boys, don't worry about
growing up to be like your uncle Scrooge.

That's right, boys.

If you're smart, you'll grow up
to be like your uncle Donald.
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