01x48 - Double-O-Duck

[bunniefuu]

Life is like a hurricane

Here in Duckburg

Racecars, lasers, aeroplanes

It's a duck-blur

Might solve a mystery

Or rewrite history

DuckTales, ooh-ooh

Every day they're out there
making DuckTales

Ooh-ooh

Tales of derring-do,
bad and good-luck tales

D- d-d-danger!

Watch behind you

There's a stranger out to find you

What to do?
Just grab onto some DuckTales

Ooh-ooh

Every day they're out there
making DuckTales

Ooh-ooh

Tales of derring-do,
bad and good-luck tales

Ooh-ooh

Not ponytails or cottontails,
no, DuckTales

Ooh-ooh

There's Bruno. Let's go.

Whoa!

Aah!

Whoa!

Heh-heh-heh-heh-heh!

Hey, what's the big idea?

Psst.

- Here's the delivery.
- Sorry. Heh-heh.

Gotta delivery this box for Mr. McD.
Maybe next time.

Are you insane?
You've gotta take this to Geneva.

Well, if you insist. But who's Geneva?

- New girl in town?
- Cut the jokes, Bruno.

OK, buster.
J. Gander Hoover wants to see you.

Hold it, hold it.
I've already got two deliveries.

He'll have to wait his turn. Sheesh.

Last chance to tell us what you know,
Bruno.

Well, I know my name isn't Bruno.

- Mr. McD, you got my message!
- What have you done this time?

Tell Mr. Hoover I'm not a spy.
Tell him I don't know anything.

I'll vouch for that. Launchpad's brain is
like a Teflon pan - nothing sticks.

We caught Bruno on the subway,
Mr. Hoover.

Remarkable resemblance.

He looks more like Bruno
than you-know-who-no.

- OK, Lunchpail.
- Launchpad!

Whatever. We need a spy
who can impersonate Bruno Von Beak.

A double agent,
someone who can locate FOWL.

You got the wrong guy.

I wouldn't know the first place
to look for chickens.

No, not "fowl. " F-O-W-L, the Foreign
Organization for World Larceny.

You are the only one who can stop FOWL's
leader - the infamous Dr. Nogood.

Don't do it, Launchpad. It sounds too risky.

But Dr. Nogood's planning
to destroy the world's money supply.

Nothing's too risky when it comes
to money. Where does he sign up?

Before we send you out
into the code world,

our inventor must familiarize you
with your spy equipment, Lunchpail.

- Launchpad!
- Whatever.

Gyro! You work for the DIA, too?

I can't pay my rent
inventing things for Mr. McDuck.

And around here they call me G.

Now for your mission.
You must wear this toupee.

I get it. This is to make me look like Bruno.

Yes, but this is no ordinary toupee.
It's a toupee p*stol, a Wig.45

Hairy.

What's this?
A special comb for the toupee?

It's special, all right -
it's a telephone comb.

Next, we have these exploding cuff links.
Remove this pin, count to five and throw.

Click these heels together,
and they become elevator shoes.

A bow tie with a hidden camera.
Great for surveillance.

- And last but not least...
- Wow! What a set of wheels!

And wings and rudders. You see, this car
can also become a helicopter or a boat

at the flick of a switch.
I call it the Thunderclutch Whirly Thingy.

Gee, G. Something tells me
I'm gonna like this spy business.

OK, OK, OK, there's just one piece
of business left - a new name.

I was just getting used to "Lunchpail. "

From now on,
you'll be known as Agent Double-0 Duck.

Double-0 Duck?
Hey, I like the sound of that.

Don't forget this. It's top-secret.

Make contact in Geneva,
pretending you're Bruno.

But once you've learned of Nogood's
whereabouts, call on your comb

and we'll send in our DIA forces.

Good luck, Double-0 Duck.

Say, you wouldn't happen to have an extra
Thunderclutch Whirly Thingy, would you?

- Psst.
- Oh, greetings, fellow spy.

- Shh.
- Huh?

Next contact - New Deli.
Code: Pastrami on rye, hold the mustard.

New Delhi. Gotcha.

Where have you been?
Did you get the response to your code?

Only from a few Indian beggars
who'd love a pastrami on rye.

- They chased me all over New Delhi.
- Not New Delhi, India!

That New Deli!
Nate 'n Yodel's New Swiss Delicatessen.

Whoops. Heh-heh.

- Simple mistake.
- Wait.

The next contact's no longer there.
She's looking for you in New Delhi.

Look for Feathers.

Feathers? Am I back to looking
for chickens again?

Fill 'er up.

Feathers?

Feathers!

Feathers?

Ladies, gentlemen and snake charmers,

please give a real big hand
to Miss Feathers Galore.

Wowza! What a chick!

Pastrami on rye, hold the mustard?

- 407.
- What's that? The next code?

No, my room number.
Meet me upstairs in five minutes.

Come in, Bruno, darling.

- Hey, nice pad.
- As if you haven't been here before.

Shouldn't we take care of business first?

Since when do you put business
before pleasure, poopsy?

Let's smoochy-smoochy.

But shouldn't you get this briefcase
to Dr. Nogood?

I'll take it to him at the New Deli later.

Aah!

- What's that?
- Whoops. I can explain.

It was a going-away present from Mom.

I thought your mother passed away

She did.
It was a going-away-for-good present.

Anyway, takes a nice little snapshot
for a bow tie, huh? Heh-heh.

Never mind the pictures.
Let's get back to smoochy-smooch.

Careful!

Aah!

Uh-oh. I should've warned you.
I have k*ller dandruff.

- What was that?
- What was what?

- That! Sounded like a telephone.
- I don't hear a telephone.

- Could you excuse me for a minute?
- Where are you going?

To answer my comb...
I mean, to comb my hair.

- What do you want?
- How's our spy doing?

Terrible. Why didn't you tell me
Bruno was dating Feathers Galore?

Details, details. Hurry up and find
Dr. Nogood. Time is of the essence.

Now, if you'll excuse me,
I have to, uh, powder my beak.

- Hello, Dr. Nogood?
- Yes, Miss Galore?

I have every reason to believe Bruno
is a double agent. That or an impostor.

- Is he behaving suspiciously?
- Yes.

And his kisses aren't worth a pucker.

Well, I'm sure you know what to do.
Give him just one more kiss.

Of course. The kiss of death.

With my poison lipstick.

Come here. I want to kiss you.

I know you had your heart set
on smoochy-smoochy, but I've gotta buzz.

You're not going anywhere.

Yah!

Phew!

Hiyah!

I had no idea smoochy-smoochy meant
this much to you.

Hiyah!

Where's that darn helicopter switch?

Come on, Thunderclutch!
Don't fail me now.

Hey, watch it! It's your type
who give women drivers a bad name.

Heh-heh-heh!

Thought you had me that time, didn't you?

Yipes!

Lucky for me I can make this
into a helicopter.

My only hope is to call for... help!

Duckburg Intelligence
Agency. Sorry, but all lines are busy.

If you wish to make a call,
hang up and try again.

Aah! Aah-aah-aah!

This is no time to poop out on me.

Abandon ship!

Thank goodness
I have my trusty parachute.

Heh-heh. Make that an untrusty raft.

Aah!

Help!

There's got to be a connection between
Nate 'n Yodel's Deli and Dr. Nogood.

Oops.

What happened to that lady
who just came in here?

- Feathers, the one with the briefcase?
- Yeah.

- Never seen her before.
- Hmm.

Here's your Swiss cheese, Fritz.
Where do you want it?

- Your fresh-a bread-a. It's-a here.
- I didn't order any bread.

- Salami?
- No.

- Cappuccino royale?
- The only thing I ordered was pickles.

Whoops.

Here's der pickles. Heh-heh.
So fresh, Peter Piper just picked 'em.

Hey, what are you doing here?
I'm the pickle man!

Uh-oh. Now I'm in a pickle.

Uh-oh. Locked.

I better turn up the temperature
before I turn into a pickle-sicle. Hmm.

Something's fishy about this deli.
And I'm not talking red herring.

Wow.

An underground complex.
That Dr. Nogood is up to no good.

Hey, do you smell pickles?

Aha!

Dr. Nogood!

- Duckburg Intelligence Agency.
- This is Double-0 Duck.

I found Dr. Nogood's headquarters.
Send your troops to...

- Oops.
- Is that Oops Avenue or Oops Street?

Soon the world's money supply
will be ruined.

In a few hours, my troopers will break into
Swiss banks from underground tunnels,

spray their vaults of money
with my ink vanisher

that'll make all that money nothing
but worthless blank paper.

I'll wreak havoc
with the world's money supply.

My private stockpile of gold will make me
the richest man in the world, and... and...

Why do I have this sudden craving
for pickles?

- Grab him!
- Why did you hang up, Double-0 Duck?

Not now!

I've been wondering when you'd show up.

A very good likeness of Bruno Von Beak,
I must admit. Who are you spying for?

You can thr*aten me, you can t*rture me,
but I'll never snitch on the DIA!

The DIA, huh?
What do you think of that, Flower?

I agree. Anyone who works for the DIA
should meet my other pets. Odduck?

Hey, no need to push. I like pets.

Oh, no. As if the lions weren't enough.

Shut up, you fool.
It's because of you that I'm here.

- Me? What did I do?
- You got away!

Look, let's let bygones be bygones.

How about a few of your backflips
to show those kittens who's boss?

It's worth a try. Hiyah!

We've got to get out of here.
I'm too pretty to die.

Of course! My trick shoes.

Yah!

Know any other tricks?

I must be doing something wrong.

Maybe you forgot
the magic words, Dorothy.

You... you saved my life.

- Even Bruno never did that.
- Hey, I'm no heel.

Speaking of heels, nobody told me
how to make these things go down.

There's no time to figure it out. Run!

It's no use! I'm getting nowhere slow.

Hiyah! Hiyah!

Hello, DIA? I need help.

Please deposit 25 cents
for the first three minutes.

Where?
I'm talking on a pocket comb here.

Sorry. Pocket combs are not considered
approved operating equipment

by your telephone company.

I'd like to reach out and strangle someone.

Wait a minute. Why am I running?
I'm not helpless.

Go ahead. Make my toupee.

Is this what they mean by "bite the b*llet"?

I don't suppose that's a beehive bazooka?

This is no time to fix your hair!

- Here. Call the DIA.
- But I thought you were working for FOWL.

They're trying to k*ll me!
Besides, I'd rather work with you.

Please deposit 25 cents.

I can't! I'm talking
on a speed-dialing styling brush!

Oh, sure. And I suppose I'm talking
into a cordless toaster phone.

Cut the lip and have the DIA send help
to Nate 'n Yodel's Deli, fast!

You know your orders. To the banks
of Switzerland. Destroy their money!

Oh, it feels so good to be no good.
Heh-heh.

Hold it right there, Nogood.
This toupee has a hair trigger.

Sticks and stones will break
my bones, but toupees will never hurt me.

Uh-oh.

You don't have any sticks
and stones on you, do you?

After him!

My darling. Are you all right?

I will be, once you stop slapping me.

Aah!

Yow! Ow! Ooh! Ah! Yow!
Ooh-ooh-ah! Ooh!

Hold it right there,
or I'll throw this vanishing fluid on you.

Not so fast there, Dr. Nogood.
This cufflink can blow you to smithereens.

You expect me to believe that
after your little toupee trick?

Would you believe
my belt turns a cannon?

Better luck to you next lifetime.

Aah!

Hiyah!

Aah!

Now, that's what I call hitting him
with my best snapshot.

- But, Lunchpail...
- Launchpad!

Whatever. We need you. We wanna make
you a full-time Double-0 Duck.

Sorry, Mr. Hoover.
The spy business is too dangerous for me.

I'm going back to something safe,
like working for Mr. McD.

Take me with you, you big galoot.
You ruffle my feathers.

Sorry. I am not that kind of guy.
I crash alone.

We both know your heart belongs
to Bruno.

If that chopper leaves the ground,
and you're not with him, you'll regret it -

maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow,
but soon and for the rest of your life.

Here's lookin' at you, Feathers.

Uh-oh.

Something tells me
I should have filled up again in Istanbul.

Launchpad,
you're a double-O dope!