03x09 - Episode 9

[bunniefuu]

Hey Josh, when's your birthday?

November 10th. Why? I'm going

to read you your horoscope. I

don't believe in all that urology

stuff.

Astrology.

Now let's see, you're a Scorpio,

so here we go, it

says.

A very good friend of yours will be

grabbed by sailors,

stuffed into a blue trash

can, screamed at,

hit with a lamp, and when your friend

comes out, he'll be wearing

a frilly pink dress.

OK, that

might be one of the stupidest things I've

ever heard.

Wait, wait, It said to be hit with a

lamp. He was in here with a

lamp.

Thank you. My name's Maddie and I enjoy

red meat.

OK, now before we

officially start the show, does

anybody have a question they'd like toask?

You. Oh, yeah.

Amanda, what happened to the

lower half of your body?

Oh, man, it escaped

again.

Kathy, have you seen the lower

half of my body?

I got it, Amanda.

Why does it keep running away

and hates those pants?

Would you mind reassembling me?

Sure, no problem. Thanks.

This will just take a SEC.

There, Thanks. Can you stick

around? We'll be back in a second to do

stuff.

Kids.

No TV till you finish your chores.

But I don't want to do

chores.

Don't make me come over there.

Wow, how did you do that?

I just pressed pause the mic, bring up

remote.

What you

talking

about is the universal remote that

lets you control any

grown up. Now rewind.

Let's get out of here.

Yes. No TV until.

Stay. It works on bombs.

Kids, I just saw your

report cards and I have a few things to

say. Now I'm sure that

you know that I.

Understand. Rachel, you need to ask me

about nothing to like, get you and you're

you're like Daniel and put you in the

basement. Now do you understand what I'm

saying?

We sure do.

It even works on teachers.

They realize that the Bill of

Rights would, divided

by the square root of the dangling

participle, can be

combined with sulfur

dioxide. Which?

The grown up remote comes

with grown up controlling universal

remote and batteries

grown-ups not included.

Hello, I'm Amanda.

You may know me as Bucky Mcbuck

Buck, the world's most ticklish

pony. There's yet

another tragedy sweeping our nation

that I feel deserves our special

attention. The sad

truth is, very few people

know what to do when

hula girls att*ck.

We're all familiar with sunny and

beautiful Hawaii, with its

coconuts, palm trees, and

their state fish, the pocapooka

nipsey bass. But this

tropical paradise is also a

breeding ground for the most

dangerous of all dancers.

Hula girls,

you've heard about these horrifying

att*cks, but now,

caught on videotape, you're about to

actually witness some of these

actual events, just

as they actually happened.

As you can see, band practice was

marching along just fine at Luzerre

Junior High School. Now watch

closely you see the hula

girls approach from out of nowhere

and after a moment of Hawaiian hip

swiveling, the hula girls

att*ck.

What a terrible thing to

witness. So let's look at

it again in slow motion.

The young musicians never had a

chance. They didn't see the

hula girls until they

att*cked.

They punched her butt.

They bent my arm.

I'll never play an instrument again.

What the hell this?

Those poor, pitiful

nerds. And if you think that

was bad, take a look at what happened

at this year's national weightlifting

competition.

Watch carefully as the weightlifter

goes for the gold medal.

He starts to lift the enormous weight,

but watch what happens.

The weightlifter's about to say Aloha to

some Hawaiian hooligans.

The hula girls att*ck.

Even the strongest man on the planet

is no match for these

Polynesian pitbulls.

It sickens me to witness something

so brutal and senseless.

So let's watch it again in slow motion.

The hapless weightlifter never

expected to be mauled by a pack

of deranged hula demons and

pretty grass skirts.

I was about to win the gold medal, you

know, by lifting a heavy

thing when I was

att*cked by hula girls.

They kick, they punch, they

swivel. I

mean, the grass skirts were pretty and

all that. That doesn't take away the

pain and

the embarrassment.

Oh man, I'm stupid.

He certainly is.

If you witness an att*ck by hula

girls, please call our

emergency hotline

1500. I

just saw some hula girls att*ck some

persons around, calling this 500

number to report what I saw.

Thank you. Please tune in

next week when we will be displaying

YOUR f*cking.

Yo-yo, yo, It's

Amanda's Jacuzzi.

Stay My special guest is King

Henry the eighth. So

your King Henry the eighth. I

am, I am. And you were

married like 8 times

more or less. Yeah. Interesting.

Now, is it also true that you have a

family of Norwegians living in your

pants?

Well, how about a plate of

spaghetti?

That was Amanda's

Jacuzzi. yo-

yo yo.

Smash her up. Good son. Will

do, dad.

I'll get it.

Can I help you? Yes, ma'am.

We're we're repairman here to

fix your your

refrigerator. But our refrigerator

is working just fine. Afraid not,

ma'am. It's,

yeah, broken. You know what's going

on here? Oh, well, they say that our

refrigerator is broken.

Yes, Sir. It says right here

on this clipboard. Yes,

honey, honey clipboards don't

lie. Come on in.

Dad, I really don't think

there's a problem with our

refrigerator. They

have a clipboard.

Yeah, you might want to step into

the other room. This could be

dangerous, whatever

you say.

Don't you guys need tools or

something? Yeah, certainly. Please

do not tell us how to do it job.

It chickens us.

Oh,

it looks like this pizza could be the

problem. Oh yeah.

You might have to do an old chew test on

that there. Quit thinking.

Yeah. Oh,

that's nice.

Yeah, I just have to

check the

temperature here, the pudding

here compared to the,

the Fahrenheit factor, the Brea

next to.

We need all our food.

Now, son, Now

wait a minute.

They are eating our food. Well, that's

not right. I told you.

You know, I don't think you guys are our

repairman at all.

All the nerves,

let's just get back to our game.

I.

I'll get it.

Yes, Afternoon,

ma'am. Here to

check your your smoke

thingies. Well, come

right in.

Dad.

Don't they look just like those

people who just came in here and ate our

food?

Those were repairman.

These are firemen. What's

the matter with you?

We we have a smoke alarm right

here.

Yes, ma'am. We

prefer to start in the kitchen right

here, ma'am.

The kitchen, let alone fact,

most fires start right here in the

refrigerator.

Hey, hey, they're doing it

again.

Say, what are you doing there?

Oh, they took us

again.

I wonder who that could be.

Hi.

Here to check your.

Gravity here. Oh well,

come right in.

It was just some

astronauts checking

our gravity.

Great.

It's the

same people.

Say now.