04x08 - Vince Is Back

[bunniefuu]

WOMAN: Are you ready?

♪ Ooh ♪

♪ I know you see me
standing here ♪

♪ Do I look good,
my dear? ♪

♪ Do I look good today? ♪

♪ Today, today ♪

♪ Ooh ooh ooh ♪

♪ I'm just another
kind of girl ♪

♪ And you want
to see my world ♪

♪ So come and run away ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

♪ If you wanna play ♪

♪ Come and play today ♪

♪ Let's just get away, yeah ♪

♪ I will make you see ♪

♪ All of the things ♪

♪ That you can be ♪

♪ Believe in yourself ♪

♪ Come follow me ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

[girls screaming]

- There he is,
the great Vince Blake.

Vince was taking pictures
of the test.

That--that's cheating.

- You're the only person
who knows,

so if I get busted,

I know who to blame, right?

You picking up
what I'm putting down?

Good.

- Just keep your mouth shut
about Vince.

- Vince cheated.

- Told you not to mess with me.

- Then you're gonna mess
with us too.

- I can't believe
the three of you

took on the whole football team.

- They just hit you guys?

- Hit...

- Punched...
- Kicked...

- You poor guys.

- ♪ Ooh ♪

♪ Ah ♪

[engine roaring]

♪ ♪

- Mmm, how awesome
are these pickles?

- Mmm.

- PCA definitely has
the best pickles.

- What is a pickle, anyway?

- It starts off life
as a cucumber.

- And then?

- Uh...

It hits puberty.

And then it's a pickle?

I--I don't know.

Just eat it.

- Cucumbers become pickles

when you soak them
for a few weeks

in brine, which is
very salty water.

- So a pickle's just
a salty cucumber?

- Basically--and you can pickle
just about anything.

Uh, beets, eggs,

um, herring,

tomatoes?

- What are you doing?

- I'm inventing...

The pickle fry!

- You're lame.
- You're dumb.

- Leave him alone!

- Why are you defending Logan?

- Yeah.

- Uh...

I'm not?

Stupid Logan.

[upbeat rock music]

♪ ♪

- ♪ Rocket Pop,
Rocket Pop ♪

♪ Cold and sweet ♪

♪ Rocket Pop, Rocket Pop ♪

- So how you guys doing, huh?

- ♪ Sweet, sweet ♪

[crowd chatter]

- Oh, hey, man.

Good to see you back.

- Oh, you guys are so sweet.

- We missed you.

- Hey, I missed you too.

It's really nice--
- It's good to have you back.

How have you been?
- Good.

[voices slowing down]
- Yeah. I hope so.

[slowed-down laughter]

Really hope so...

[loud booming]

- No!

[laughter]

- Logan! Zoey!

Lola! Quinn!

He's back! He's back!

He's back!
I just saw him!

He's back at PCA--
- Oh, my--

[screaming]

[all gasping]

- Oh, my God.

- Ah!
- Are you all right?

- What happened?

- Vince Blake is back.

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- How could you let Vince Blake
back into PCA?

- Girls, it's very complicated.

- It's not complicated!

- He cheated on a major test.

- And then he b*at up
three of our best friends.

- Which is why he was expelled.

- I realize that.

I am the one who expelled him.

- Well, "expelled"
means expelled!

- You can't just
let him back in!

- And why are you playing
with a cheesy-bake oven?

- Yeah, what's wrong with you?

- [sighs]

I bought this for my daughter,

and my wife wants me
to test it for safety,

so I'm making
a blueberry cheesecake.

[laughing] It's so cute!

- Hey!

- We're talking to you
about something important.

[oven dings]

[sighs]

- We don't want Vince Blake
at PCA!

- Listen,

Vince spent a lot of time
in teen therapy.

It was an intensive program,

and I was guaranteed
by the counselors

and Vince's parents that he's
a different person now.

- Well, I ain't buying it.

- Neither ain't I.

- [sighs] We demand you kick
Vince out of PCA.

- Seriously.

- Are you listening?

- Absolutely.

- So you'll get rid of him?

- Nope.

Now, who wants cheesecake?

- ♪ Ooh ♪

[rock music]

- So that's it?
- That's just it?

- Yup.
- So Dean Rivers is just

fine with letting him
go to school here?

- Uh-huh.
- He wouldn't even listen to us.

- He just sat there
making a teeny cheesecake.

- Did you remind him
that he b*at up me,

Michael, and Chase?

- And Del Figgalo.

- Well, Mark probably
deserved it.

- He was your boyfriend.

- Well, he's not anymore!

Well, he's not.

- I'm outraged.

Out-raged!

- Me too.

- Calm down.
Have some Javaccino.

Good girl.

- Well, what are we gonna
do about this?

- Yeah, what are we gonna do?

- We'll tell you
what we're gonna do.

- We're gonna ignore him.

- Yeah, we are.

- Whenever he's around,
we act like he's not even there.

- And if he tries to talk
to any of us,

we just go, "Hmm!"

- Yeah, I don't think so.

- We're gonna do a lot more
to Vince Blake

than just go, "Hmm!"

- So, what are you gonna do?

- It's not like you two
can b*at him up.

- Yeah, Vince could punch you
both in the face


you could yell, "Ow."

- [laughing]

- [derisive laughter]

Thank you, Lola.

- We're not gonna fight him.

- Smart.

- So what are you gonna do?

- We're gonna dish out
a little comeuppance.

- The thing you wear around your
waist with a tuxedo?

- That's a cummerbund.

- Well, what's a comeuppance?

- "To comeuppance" means

to get revenge.

- [sighs]

- So, what kind of cheesecake?

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Here you go.
Grandiose Javaccino.

- [laughing] Yes!

Come here.
[sighs]

- I thought we were gonna give
Vince some comeuppance.

- Oh, we are.

[chuckles]

Little green ball.

From Quinn.

- What's it do?

- [chuckles] Let's just say...

this Javaccino is gonna
comeuppance

all over Vince Blake's face.

[laughter]

Okay, Calvin.
You know what to do.

- And you promise you'll get me
a date with Lola?

- As far as you know.

- Here comes Vince.

- Oh, no. Here. Do it.

[horn honking]

- Hey, congratulations.
- Ow!

CALVIN: Yeah, you.

You're the 100th guy

to walk past this cart today.

You win a free
Grandiose Javaccino.

- Thanks, but
I don't drink coffee.

Hey...wait...

- I'll take it.

- But...

[slurping]

both: Uh-oh.

[dramatic music]

[expl*si*n]

- Can I get another one?

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- What's up, Lola?

- Just getting ready
to do some yoga.

- Same here--know what I love
most about yoga?

- Later.

- Okay. See ya!

♪ ♪

[smooth vocal harmonies]

♪ ♪

- I like your outfit.

- Hmm!

- Is there a problem?

- Yeah, could you not
stand next to me like that?

- Sure, how would you like me to
stand, like this?

Maybe like this?

Either of those work for you?

- Why don't you go stand at
the bottom of a swimming pool?

For like half an hour?
- Wow.

It almost seems like
you hate my guts.

- Oh, well I never meant to make
it seem like I hate your guts.

- You didn't?
- No, I mean to make it, like,

way clear that I hate your guts.

- And now you have.
- Good.

- You're cute.
- Don't call me "cute."

I don't want to be called
"cute" by you.

- Any reason?
- Yeah.

'Cause you b*at up my friends.

- Listen:

I've changed,
all right?

I'm a different person now.
- Oh, please.

A guy can't go from being
an obnoxious jerk

to a good person
in one year.

- I'm standing here.

- Yeah, wish you weren't.

- Look: I'm really sorry

about what I did
to your friends.

But come on, I got expelled,
for crying out loud.

LOLA: [sighs]
- That's not enough?

- Nope.

- So what's gonna
make you happy?

You want to see me get b*at up?

- That'd be awesome.

- All right.

Back up now.

Oh!

Ah!

Hoo!

Now I'm gonna finish myself off

with one of these.

D'oh! Oh!

There.

Now I have been hit,

slapped, and thumped.

You like me?

- Let's see--no.

MAN: Welcome, yoga people.

Namaste.

Everybody stand.

We'll start with
some sun salutations.

[peaceful Eastern music]

- Listen: after class,
why don't you let me

buy you a smoothie
and we'll talk, okay?

YOGA INSTRUCTOR: Switch Mukha.

♪ ♪

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Hi.
- Oh. Hey.

Stacey told me Vince Blake
was in your yoga class.

- Yeah. He was.
- So, what happened?

Did you snub him?
Did you go, "Hmm!"

- Sure did.
- So, what happened?

- Well, I told him
I was really mad about

the way he b*at up the guys,
and,

you know, I said
other mean stuff.

- And what'd he say?

- Just that he's changed,

and he asked if we could talk
after yoga.

ZOEY: So, did you?
- Yeah.

- And what happened?

- I kissed him!

- You kissed him?

- Four times.
- Why?

- He's really good at it.

[upbeat rock music]

QUINN: What?

- Lola kissed Vince Blake
four times.

- Has she lost her mind?

- Yes. She's a traitor.

- Stop talking about me
like I'm not in the room!

- You do realize
you kissed the boy

who b*at up our best friends?

- He's changed.
He's really nice now.

Do you know he helps raise money
for orphans in Nicaragua?

- Maybe Vince hypnotized her.

- Stop it!

- I can't believe
you would do this.

- Of all the boys at PCA.

- You guys, listen:

I know Vince used to be a mean,

horrible egomaniac,

but people can change.

He's really sweet now,
and gentle,

and he's really fun to kiss.

Four times!
- Quit saying that!

- I can't!
I had a blast!

- I can't listen to this.

I have to go for a walk.

- [sighs] I'll come with you.

- Can I come?

- No.
- Not really.

Why don't you just go kiss
your boyfriend some more?

- Okay.

[laughing]

- Lola?

- Kissed Vince Blake?

- Four times!

She says he's changed,

and he's really nice now.

- Ah!
- Well, we don't care!

- That's right, me and Logan

are gonna take care
of Mr. Vince Blake.

- With this.

ZOEY: What is that?

- A spring-loaded
launching device.

- After we put it together,

it'll fling any five-pound item

over 300 yards.

- Vince Blake will get
his comeuppance.

- Yes, he will.

[sweet vocal harmonies]

♪ ♪

- This thing is awesome.

- Those Quebecistanians know how
to engineer fine equipment.

♪ ♪

Hey! Look, look, look.

♪ ♪

LOGAN: And there's our target.

♪ ♪

MICHAEL: "Hi, I'm Vince Blake.

I think I can b*at up people
and get away with it."

Well, think again!

♪ ♪

- Yeah.

It's comeuppance time.

- Let's do this.

[horn honking]

- Dean Rivers?
Uh, hey.

Can I get a quick photo of you
for the PCA yearbook?

I'm on the staff.

- Can we do it another time?

It's my little girl's birthday,
and I want to get this

cheesy-cake oven--
- It'll just take 60 seconds.

- All right.

Let's do it over there
by that palm tree.

- Sweet.

[giggles]

[pleasant music]

♪ ♪

- Give me the eggs.

- Eggs...

♪ ♪

Ah.

And a little ketchup.

♪ ♪

Ah!

- Few anchovies?

- Oh, nothing like
a hairy fish.

♪ ♪

Oh. [chuckles]

- Ready?

- Unlock the trigger guard.

♪ ♪

[electronic beeping]

Target acquired.

♪ ♪

One...

- Two...

both: Three!

[whipping through wind]

- [gasps]

The whole arm flew off!

- Yes, the cheesy-cake oven
works fine,

and totally--

[sparks crackling]

♪ ♪

I might be late.

- Ah, I see you guys
got your thing built.

- Oh, did you get Vince?

- No.

♪ ♪

QUINN: Look at him,

just sitting there,

looking all smug.

- And look who's coming his way.

- Hey, you.
- Hey, how you doing?

- Good.
- Oh, you look beautiful.

[all groaning]

ZOEY: Look at that!
How can she like him?

- The guy who hit us.
- In our faces.

- And other places.

Oh! With his foot.

- All right,
I can't take this anymore.

- Me neither.
- What are you gonna do?

- We're gonna go tell Vince that
we don't want him at PCA.

- And that we sure don't want
him cavorting with our Lola.

- You should.
- Let's go tell him off.

- Right beside you.

[laughter]

- Hey, what happened?

- Um, you know...

I don't know.

- Stuff?

- Well, did you guys
talk to Vince or not?

- Yes.
- He's really nice.

- Oh, my God!
- What?

- It's true.
- Vince has changed.

- He apologized for everything.

- Did you know he reads poems
to the elderly now?

- Oh, get out!
- Dude.

- If our lady friends want to be
all chummy-chummy

with Vince Blake, so be it.

Not us,

'cause you know
what we're gonna get?

- Comeuppance!

- "Come," "upp," and "ance"!

- But...

Vince bought us gummy bears.

MICHAEL: Get out!

[upbeat music]

- So yes, I have eaten one,

but I didn't know it was alive.

all: Eww!

- Um, okay, Zoey.

Have you ever kissed
someone you didn't like?

- Yes.
- Who?

- Tell us!
- Go on.

- Jeff Norkin in seventh grade.
- [laughing]

- Why'd you kiss him
if you didn't like him?

- 'Cause he was sweet,

and he seemed so desperate.

- Aww.
both: Boo!

- Lame.

- Oh, and you've never kissed

someone you didn't like?

- Of course I have.

I didn't like you.

- But who loves me now?
- Me.

[laughter]
- Oh, eww!

- Okay, stop. Come on.

QUINN: Ah. Boo!

No PDA. Stop it.

[laughter]

[funky bass music]

- They make me sick.

- Our friends.

Laughing with Vince Blake.

[laughter]

♪ ♪

[radio beeps]

- Bubble Wrap.
Bubble Wrap, you there?

- Go for Bubble Wrap.

- This is the Egg Man
and the Walrus.

We're on our way.

Count to 30, then call
the Corn Flake.

[radio crackles]

♪ ♪

- Who's the Corn Flake?

- [sighs]
Vince is the Corn Flake.

Why did we even
have the meeting?

[rock music]

[laughter]

- All right, okay. Quinn.

Have you ever
committed a crime?

- Does buying purified uranium
from Bakislavia count?

[upbeat bass music]

♪ ♪

- 27...28...



Hey, Vince! Vince Blake!

Help!

♪ ♪

Help!

♪ ♪

- Wait.
- Stay here.

- But some guy just--

- It's a trick.

- A trick?
- Logan and Michael

want to give you "comeuppance."

- For what?

- 'Cause you b*at 'em up
last year.

- Oh, right,

people did used to hate it
when I'd hit 'em.

So what are they gonna do?

- They're trying to lure you
over there

so you'll step
on a trigger plate,

and then stuff's gonna
fall all over you.

- Ah.

- Ooh, how mature!

- I'll be right back.

- Where you going?

- To go step
on the trigger plate.

- Dude.
- Why?

- Vince!
- Don't!

- Look, those guys aren't

wrong to be mad at me.

And if they feel like
they got to get me back

for what I did...

I'm gonna let them get
their "comeuppance."

- You are so brave.

- I think I'll be all right.

[dramatic music]

- Here he comes.
Here he comes!

- This is gonna be so great.

♪ ♪

How much mustard's
gonna fall on him?

- 55 gallons.

- Awesome.

- And then he gets blasted.
- Oh, yeah.

What'd Firewire
put in the cannon?

- Croutons.

- One of those couch-bed things?

- No.

Croutons!

The crunchy bread nuggets
you put on salads.

♪ ♪

[suspenseful music]

♪ ♪

- [sighs]

♪ ♪

[electronic beeping]

♪ ♪

[stomping feet]

[electronic beeping]

♪ ♪

Hey, Michael, Logan.

I'm trying here.

[electronic beeping]

What am I doing wrong?

[electronic beeping]

[bouncy music]

♪ ♪

- Way to go, Vince.
Thanks for breaking our thing.

- Who do you think you are?

♪ ♪

[electronic beeping]

- Look, guys,

I'm sorry about
what happened before.

I mean, I know I wasn't
the nicest guy,

but I've really changed.

And if you give me a chance,

I hope we could be friends.

Look, if you want to kick me,

or punch me in the face,

however you want to
"comeuppance" me,

go for it.

I promise I won't fight back.

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

Seriously, I--I deserve it.

♪ ♪

- [sighs]

♪ ♪

We're cool, man.

- Good.

We cool?

♪ ♪

Let's hang out sometime, huh?

- [sighs]

I guess people can change.

- Guess so.
[electronic beeping]

Now I kind of feel bad about--

There's the mustard.

[electronic beeping]

[expl*si*n]
- Oh, man!

[laughter]

- [sighs] And the croutons.

[laughter]

WOMAN: ♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

♪ I'm just another
kind of girl ♪

♪ And you want
to see my world ♪

♪ So come and run away ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

♪ If you wanna play ♪

♪ Come and play today ♪

♪ Let's just get away, yeah ♪

♪ I will make you see ♪

♪ All of the things ♪

♪ That you can be ♪

♪ Believe in yourself ♪

♪ Come follow me ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

[dinging]
- Mmm.

- They make me sick.