[ music ]
- Well, it was actually invented in the s
by a guy named Kevin Sham.
- Kevin Sham? - Yeah.
And he made it by mixing honey
with cat poop.
- Ahhhhhh, that's why they call it...
- Sham--poo.
- No, I get it. It's cool. - That's why I don't use it.
- Kinda sounds like you made that up. Did you make that up?
- No, that's just true as I'm standin' here.
- Alright.
What is that?
- Looks like a gift basket...
although much larger than most gift baskets.
- Well, who do you think sent it?
- I'm not sure...
but it was definitely someone.
- So...your theory is that it was sent by someone.
- Or somebody.
- Yeah, I'm just gonna check the card.
- What's it say?
- Umm... What?!?
No way, dude check this out,
it was sent by the Dixie Chicks!
- Shut up! Really?
- I swear, look, look, look, look.
- "Dear Captain Man and Kid Danger.
"You guys are even better than country music.
"Enjoy the enormous basket.
Love--all three Dixie Chicks!"
- No way!! - Oh wow!
- Dude, that is amazing!
- Hey, we gotta call the Dixie Chicks
and thank 'em, right now!
- Ooo yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah!
- Ah. - Wha--oh.
- Hey computer!
- Hello, how can I help you?
- Call Dixie Chicks.
- Calling: Dixie... Fried Chicken.
- No no, not fried chicken. Just abort, abort--
- What's the smoke about?
- I dunno.
Why don't you smell it,
and then tell me what it smells like.
- Alright. I'll just go ahead... Wait what?
Why do I have to smell it?
- Well what if it's dangerous?
- Well yeah, you're the indestructible one.
- Yeah but you're young. You have a young nose.
- What? Okay, y'know what, let's just...
let's just smell it together. Okay?
- Fine.
- Okay okay, what are you getting,
- Alright, I'm getting uhh... I'm gettin' hits of oak...
- Okay, I'm getting a little bit of oak.
But uhhh... some uhhh...
y'know a little bit of uhh...some,
- Notes of maple... you getting maple?
- Yeah I'm getting... some, some variety...
- and some...cinnamon... cinnamon...Nuts?
- Variety of fruits? - Yeah...
- Mm-mhh...uhh - Uh....
- Gah.
[ evil laugh ]
- Well well well...
so this is Captain Man's secret Man Cave.
Ha ha ha ha. Ooooh
Sleep sweetly, jerk-pops...
- Hey, can only girls wear these bunny ears?
Or can boys wear them too...
Y...you... you are The Toodler!
- It's The Toddler, ya moron.
- Captain Man? Kid Danger?
What did you do to them?!?
- Ooo, I'll never tell.
- Oh yah?!? Well then...
[ computer beeping, machines whirring ]
Hey! What'd you just do?
- Ooo, I'll never tell.
- Gah! - Aye!
[ camera shutter snapping ]
- All right, c'mon, you can't make faces like that.
- But I gotta look cool
if I want girls to like me for looking cool.
- Well just try a normal, natural smile.
- 'Kay-kay.
This better?
- Yeah, sure.
- Hey... - What?
- You know why this red light's flashing?
- What red l--
Uh-oh. Move.
- What's happening?!?
- Somebody put the Man Cave on stage two lockdown!
- Oh no! Stage two lockdown!
What does that mean?
- Dang-it, am I the only person here
who read the employee manual?!?
- I think so!
- When there's trouble in the Man Cave,
and you don't want anybody to be able to get in or out,
you activate a stage two lockdown!
- Ahhh! Oh! Ow!
- Oh my god! - Oh man!
- That's The Toddler!!!
- Well how'd The Toddler get into the Man Cave?!?
- I dunno, I just started watchin' this
when you did!!!
Something's wrong with Ray and Henry!!!
- Well what happened to 'em?!?
I just started watchin' this when you did!!!
- Ahhh! - He he he.
- It all just kinda happened.
I wanted an after-school job.
But then, an indestructible superhero
hired me to be his sidekick.
- Ah!
- Now we blow bubbles...
and fight crime. Feels good.
[ theme music ]
- Call it. - Up the tube!
- Aw, my boot! - Ha!
[ music ]
- Yeah, yeah, get in the elevator!
[ evil laugh ]
Ooooo, time for some apple juice.
- Wh...what's...
- Ooooooo. Look who's woke.
- Wh... oh my god!
- Uh, I think you mean... "Oh my TODD...ler."
- Wha-what are you doing here in the Man Cave?
Ah! Yo. - Ha ha ha ha.
- Oww! What the--
- Ha! Oh I'm sorry...
but you ain't goin' nowhere, Kid Dumbjer.
- Yeah, why don't you go change your diaper.
- No more diapers, Kid.
- What?
- I said no more diapers.
Maybe you didn't hear about it,
I hadn't seen ya for a long time,
they didn't go up there and tell ya.
- Who didn't go up where?
- I don't wear diapers anymore. Ya understand?
- Wh... what's got into you man?
I'm just messin' with ya a little bit,
that's all, I'm was only kiddin' with ya.
- Yeah well, sometimes it doesn't sound
like you're kiddin'.
- Okay, well, I'm sorry. Okay?
I'm sorry if I offended you.
- Yeah, yeah all right, all right.
Y'know I'm sorry, too. - Okay.
- Okay, salud
- Now why don't you go change your diaper?
- That's it! Ya stinkin' mutt!
Ahhh!
- Toddler!
Wh... what happened?
I was sniffing some colorful smoke and then I'm--
- Shut up, Captain Ham...
- Ooo, good one.
- Ooo, you all comfy in there?
- No!
- What is this thing, anyway?
- Oh well, I'd be delighted to explain.
Y'see...I'm gonna make you sweat.
- Sweat?
- That's right. This is a hot box...
which I will now set to...
degrees!
Think you can handle that?
- He's Captain Man, idiot.
He's indestructible.
- Hey Kid, don't uh--
- He can handle way hotter temperatures than that.
- Yeah that's right! Ha ha!
Well let's make it degrees!
- Hey thanks, Kid Danger!
Really appreciate the input!
- Y'see, Captain...
Sham...
My scientists, who happen to be evil,
they tell me that if I drink your sweat...
I will become indestructible, just like you.
For about minutes.
- You're gonna drink Captain Man's sweat?!?
- Well it's not like I'm lookin' forward to it.
But sure, if it'll make me temporarily indestructible,
then heck yeah I'm gonna drink it.
What am I, stupid?
- Ewwww. - Ewwww.
SCHWOZ: Ewwww.
- Jasper, I told you-- the elevator won't work
while the Man Cave is on stage two lockdown!
- Well I'm nervous and this keeps my finger busy!
- Well, if you wanna stay busy,
then you can help me pry this thing off the wall.
- What for? Why is that gonna help us?
- Ugh. If we get this off, then we can climb
into the air shaft, slide down it,
and get into the Man Cave so we can help Ray and Henry.
- HENRY!!!
- That's Piper!
- Yeah I know. We gotta get rid of her.
Heyyy Piper.
We were just back there--
- Flossing! We were flossing.
- I don't care about your oral hygiene!
I need to see Henry.
- Ohhhhh, whyyy?
- He set up my new phone for me,
and he turned on the, y'know,
the "facial recognition" security thing.
- Oh yeah, that's a really cool feature.
- No it's not!
- Yeah, some people don't like it.
- Henry set it up with his stupid face,
so now I can't unlock my phone without him!
- Can't ya just wait to use your phone 'til later tonight?
- Ah!
- Toddler! Toddler...c'mon man...
I need some water... I can't take this much heat!
- Ohhh yes you can, "Mister Indestructible!"
Ha! My vial is already half-full
of your sweet sweet sweat!
- Give it up, jerk!
You'll never get away with this.
- Oh yeah! And who's gonna stop me?!?
You're stuck in my sweat tube.
Your little boy toy's trapped
in my enormous gift basket...
and as for your fuzzy little co-worker...
I locked him in your stupid elevator,
with no way out!
- Yah...
I will show you who "can't get out"
of this elevator.
Daaah, that's my snack kit.
- Okay, I don't get it!
Henry supposedly works here,
but every time I come here to see him here,
he's never around!
- Your point?
- Where is Henry?!?
- He's...Henry... y'know..
Uh, Charlotte-- where'd you say Henry was again?
- Uhhh... He's...
stuck in the bathroom!
- He's stuck in the bathroom.
- Ah! Got it!
Jasper, I got it off, let's go!
- Ooo! - Wait! Go where?!?
- Uhh... to get Henry!
Ya, we're gonna crawl through an air shaft,
so that way we can get into the bathroom
and help Henry get out.
- Fine, then I'll come too.
- No no no no. - No, no, that's a bad idea.
- Why can't I go?
- Because uhhh...
- He's naked.
- Why would he be naked in the bathroom?!?
- Yeah Jasper, why?
- What?
You two don't know that dudes pee naked?
- Uh, I guess not.
- Anyway... you watch the store.
- Watch the store?
I don't know anything about store--
- Byee!!! - Byeeeee!!!
- Why pee naked?!?
- Okay, you're sure that this shaft
goes all the way down to the Man Cave?
- I think so!
Ready?!?
- Yeah, use me like a boogie board!
- Okay...
one, two, threeeee!!!
AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
- TOO MUCH FRICTIONNNNNNNN!!!
- Ahhh!!! - Ahhhhh!
- C'mon phone, let me in!
- Face, not recognized.
- No!!!
- Oh, ohhh.
- He he he he he.
- Ahhh!
- All right, Captain Ma'am...
a few swallows of this...
will make me just as indestructible as you are.
For about minutes.
And now...
- Kid!
Kid... I can't get outta here!
You gotta stop him!!!!
- I can't! I can't get outta this basket!
- Ah geez--I can't believe I'm gonna drink man sweat.
- Don't do it. - Oh well...
- No no no!!
- No!
- Oh it's so disgusting!
P'tah! P'tah!
- Ahhhh!
- Wh...what's that noise?!?
- I... I dunno...
all I can hear is me sweating.
- Ahhhhhh!
- Hiiii.
- It's...us.
- You guys, quick, get outta here, get outta here!
- But but but, The Toddler!
- We gotta stop him!
- You're too late, he already drank my sweat.
Now get outta here before he sees your faces!
- Seriously guys, go go go go!
- 'Kay Kay! - Okay c'mon!
- Oh oh!
Your sister needs you to fix her phone!
- Get outta here!!!
- What the heck was that?!
- Uh...I think you tripped.
- Yeah. It was hilarious.
- What? No, no, I didn't trip!
- C'monnnn elevator door...
- I'm the enemy.
You've been enormously argumentative today.
- You're the one that's denying what we're saying.
- And if you guys talk with me, more as human beings,
we could find some common ground.
Whataver!!
Now, let's see if I'm indestructible.
Owwwww!!!
I'm ohhhh-kaaaaay.
Get it?
'Cuz that's what you often say.
- Shut up, Toddler. - Nooo!
Now, I need to do a few tests,
just to make sure I'm indestructible!
Ahh!
I'm ohhhh-kaaaaay.
Ahhh!
I'm ohhhh-kaaaaay.
I'm ohhhh-kaaaaay.
Ahhh!
I'm ohhhh-kaaaaay.
Ahhh!
I'm ohhhh-kaaaaay.
I'm ohhhh-kaaaaay.
Still okay!
Well!
Now it looks like I'm an indestructible Toddler!
Which means I can commit any crime I want,
and no one can stop me!
For about minutes.
[ burps ]
Hey! How'd you get outta that elevator?!?
- I... I...
- Schwoz, he's still got his blaster!
- That's right!
- Ahhh!!! No, no no no...
- Oh...yes yes yes yes yes yes yes.
- Schwoz no.
- Schwoz!
- Buh-bye Schwoz.
- I'm okay!
- Schwoz! You're indestructible!!!
- I know, it's coo-coo crazy!
- Quick Schwoz, get us outta these things!
- Hurry!
- I don't think so!
Grrrr.
- Wh-what do I do now?
- Get him Schwoz!
- Yeah Schwoz,
Come have a taste of Todd...ler.
- C'mon take him out Schwoz.
You can do it.
Ohhh!! Alright that's it.
Get 'em, get him face!
- Yes!! - That's it!
- Get up, get up, get up, get up!
- Good! Good kick. - Yes!!
- Get angry Schwoz!
- Oh!! Snap!!
- Yeah, c'mon buddy.
- Schwoz...stay in it buddy. Stay in it.
There you go. Yeah yeah.
- Finish him!
Ooooo yeah!!
Nice Schwoz.
- Owww, I think you cracked my ribs!
Ahhh, I am not okay!
- That's it! It's been minutes
since The Toddler drank Captain Man's sweat!
Ooo, so his indestructibility is wearing off!
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Quick Schwoz-- grab the remote
out of his pocket and let us outta here!
- Ooo!!!
- C'mon! - Whaddaya doin' in there?
- Good job Schwoz!
Okay. Alright.
Alright, you good?
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
-- Ohhhhh man, I need about nine gallons of water.
- No worries, I'll get some for you right n--
- Gah! - Kid Danger!!! Look out!!!
- No no no no no no no!!!
Please. I promise I'll be good!!!
Don't hurt me!!!
- Oh--I'm not gonna hurt you--
- Okay. - Ha ha yeah.
Just hold up your finger. - Why?
- Just hold up your finger.
- Okay.
OWWW!!!
- Oh I'm sorry, did that hurt?
- Hey! Kid Danger! C'mere, quick!
- Hey, hey hey big guy, you okay?
- When will you get me some water?
- Just...just one sec.
What what?
- Your sister's been waiting upstairs
for over an hour.
- Why--what does she want?
- C'mon you dumb phone!
Will ya let me in already?!?
- Too many attempts.
Phone over-heating.
- That's not good.
- Temperature critical.
Contact fire department-- using another phone.
- Hey Piper!
You need me to help you with y--
Oh. There's Piper's phone.
Hey Piper, your phone's on the gr--
I should not have come to work today.
[ oven bell ] - Mmm.
04x12 - Toddler Invasion
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After school, Henry becomes Kid Danger: Captain Man's superhero sidekick.
After school, Henry becomes Kid Danger: Captain Man's superhero sidekick.