04x20 - Flabber Gassed

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Henry Danger". Aired: July 26, 2014 - March 21, 2020.*
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After school, Henry becomes Kid Danger: Captain Man's superhero sidekick.
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04x20 - Flabber Gassed

Post by bunniefuu »

[ music ]

- Yes! C'mon Henry! - Finish her!

- Someone's finally gonna b*at Charlotte!

Someone's finally gonna dethrone the queen!

- FINISH HER!!!

- Dude, that was right in my ear.

- I'm gonna do it! I'm finally gonna--

Wait... What's happening... Stop... Wait...

Yo, I'm losing health... Where is this coming from...

I'm running... I'm running!!!

- Finish him. - Run away, Henry!

- D'oh!

- I was just about to b*at you...

- Well, sometimes the cat

likes to play with the mouse before she kills it.

- Yea. Well, sometimes the cat hurts the mouse's feelings.

- Alright Charlotte,

you've proven you can defeat boy hair.

Let's see how you do against fully grown man hair.

Bye-bye.

- Hey, has anyone seen the big toenail clippers?

What?

- Are you drying yourself with a rabbit?

- Yes. - Okay.

- I'll just ask the obvious question here...Why?

- Yeah, why? - Why not use a towel?

- Where are those big toenail clippers?

- Because I sent all of our towels to the cleaners

and they all got stolen.

- Oh yeah. Our towels got stolen too.

- Same with us.

- We haven't had towels at my house in years.

- Hey, you're getting rabbit water all over the Man-Floor!

- Sorry. Sorry...

- No, don't--uh...

- Okay. Maybe we should track down

whoever's stealing these towels.

- Pff. I don't care about a towel thief.

We fight real crime, okay?

We do important things. Heroic things.

Now can I please get back to b*ating a teenage girl

at a video game? Thank you.

- Okay! Bear versus Hair-- round two!

And...fight!

- Oh, okay...

How did you... hang on...

if I could just... why am I on fire?!?

- Finish him!!!

[ alarm beeps ]

- Emergency alert.

- Pause! Pause, pause. Emergency alert!

Game over-- doesn't count.

- What? Dude, I was just about to b*at you!

- I guess we'll never know.

Schwoz, who needs savin'?

- Someone is carrying a large load of towels

into an abandoned laundromat in the Old Washing District.

- Well, we've got to deal with this towel situation right away!

I thought you said that you didn't care

about the towel thief.

- That was then. This is now.

People change. Read a book.

C'mon, Kid. Let's pop some gum...

- So you don't have to lose to Charlotte. Chum.

- Wait wait wait.

You should take your new Battle Suits!

- Our whatsit now? - What's a battle soup?

- Noooo. Battle Suits!

I just invented them last night in the tub.

- Sorry, what'd he say?

- All right. - Woah!

- Aahh! It's still wet!

- What does a Battlesuit do?

- It makes you stronger, makes you punch harder,

and it kind of smells like French vanilla.

- Ooh!

- Uh, Schwoz...this is cute.

But uh, I don't know if you know this, but...

I'm a superhero. I have a super power.

- I also have a super power.

- See uh, I'm indestructible.

- I have super fast reflexes.

- And we both smell pretty nice on our own.

- We smell gooooood...

- Man, you guys have really gotten cocky lately.

- What?

- Cocky. You know, overconfident,

big ego, full of yourselves, compensating--

- I know what cocky means!

And, by the way... isn't cocky if it's true.

- Fact.

- Come on Kid Danger. Let's go fight some crime.

Ha ha--oof! - Are you okay?

- Just doing pre-fight push ups...

you know, like I always do.

- I've never seen you do that before.

- We all know you're lying.

- Push up contest! Let's go! One, two...

- It all just kinda happened.

I wanted an after-school job.

But then, an indestructible superhero

hired me to be his sidekick.

- Ah!

- Now we blow bubbles...

and fight crime. Feels good.

[ theme music ]

- Call it. - Up the tube!

- Aw, my boot! - Ha!

- Which is why if you part your hair in same place

every time, eventually it will fall out.

- Wait dude, are you serious?

- That's what happened to Schwoz.

- Wow...Okay yea, so this is the place.

Um, I was thinking for the plan--

- Woah, hey. Let's just go in there

and do a little free form "jazz fighting".

- I'm sorry. What?

- You know! "Jazz fighting."

I'll go in there and be like,

Bada scoobedoobap pow!

- Oh yeah yeah yeah...

I'm picking up what you're putting down.

And I'll be like, bah-bah-bah...

- Yeah, and I'll be wa-pow!

- Do dee do do! - Wa pow, wa pow!

- Bow doo doo! - Bow bow bap!

Ba da ba da ba da...huh? - Dude? Dude?

- Do you think Charlotte's right?

- No! About what?

- Us. You know, maybe...maybe getting a little too cocky?

- Oh please.

C'mon I'm the least cocky person on the planet.

I'm like the LeBron James of being humble.

- Right.

- Touchdown.

- Yeah, you're right. You're right.

Let's go pound this clown.

- Yeah, all right. Here we go.

[ phone rings ]

- Oh sorry. It's my sister.

I'll just call her back.

- Nah, take it, we got time. I'll go warm up.

- Talk to me.

- Did you just say talk to me?

- I mean, uh... what's up?

- Do you have any towels at work?

- Ummmm, why?

- 'Cuz! There's hardly any towels left in Swellview,

so people are selling them online for a lot of money.

I could only find one stinkin' towel in our entire house.

- Piper, have you seen my World's Best Dad's Towel towel?

- Uhhh...yeah, I think it's in the backyard.

- Ah. That's where I left it!

- So do you have any towels or not?

- Uh, yeah.

I can getcha some towels...

I can getcha a lot of towels. - Really?!?

- Yea listen, I'll tell you what...

I'll be home in like half an hour.

Twenty minutes? Fifteen minutes?

- Great! See ya in fifteen minutes!

- Good-bye.

- Doo doo doo. Sca-bam!

- Woah! - Large man.

- Oooh! - Larger!

- Get. Away. From my towels.

- Yeah, this guy's pretty big, dude.

- So what?

The bigger they are, the louder they cry.

- Yeah, you're right, full send.

- I said get away from my towels!

- Yeah, I heard you. But listen to this!

- Uhhh, Captain Man?

- Huh. I did not think this was gonna happen.

Okay, you can man-handle a kid,

but just try to throw me through a window!

Ahhh!

I did not think that was gonna happen either.

- We might need a plan.

- Yeah, a plan might be good.

- Okay. Here's the plan-- you go back in there,

I'm gonna sneak around the back and try to find another door...

- Woah, woah, woah, you're the indestructible one.

And I'm pretty good at finding other doors, so...

- That's debatable. I've--

- Oh look, he's right here.

- Look buddy, you may be huge,

but I'm indestructible, alright?

So this is not gonna end wel--

Was that hair spray?

'Cause there's a very specific brand I use okay--

Woah, what's happening?

- I can't feel my arms and legs!

- Why can't I move?!?

- What did you spray us with?!?

- Flabber Gas.

Makes your muscles all... flabby.

- Do you have any... "back to normal" gas?

- No, but maybe there's some down in the sewer.

- Pfft. Unlikely.

Oh. I see. That's a clever way of saying

you're gonna throw me in the sewer.

Man this is not my day.

Ahhh!

- You're not gonna get away with this...

I'm sorry, what's your name?

- Barge. The name's Barge.

- Why are you stealing all these towels dude?

- [ high-pitched ] Don't tell him!

He doesn't deserve to know.

- Uhhhh...I'm so sorry, who are you talking

- My boss. The king of all towels.

- Shhh-wut?

- Now throw him down the sewer De'Bargerey

and bring more towels to your king.

Yes, your dryness.

- No no no! My talking towel says

you should let him go.

Ahhhhhhh!

- HOW AM I DOING?!?

- You are...shockingly bad at this game.

- I CAN'T HEAR YOU!

- Why do you have headphones on?

- I FIND THAT THE MUSIC--

I find that the music helps me fight better.

Ray: Get your hand off me! Henry: I'm in a separate bag!

Ray: I know that!

Henry: Then how could that be my hand?!?

- Okay, fine false alarm.

- I'm back!

- Did you find Ray and Henry?

- Yah, they're fine!

Ray: No we're not fine!

Henry: We were thrown through a window!

Ray: I also lost my car keys!

Henry: We are the opposite of fine!

- They're fine.

- Ewwwww!!! - Gross!

- You smell like my sister's barn!

- Well we were dumped in a sewer!

- By a giant named Barge

who takes orders from a towel!

- And we can't move our bodies!

- 'Cuz Barge sprayed us with Flabber Gas!

- Flabber Gas?!? - Yea!

- That's almost impossible to find.

How could a low-level towel thief

get some Flabber Gas?

- Who cares?!? Just fix us!

- Yeah, can you fix us Schwoz?

- Yah, of course.

- Yes! - You are the best, Schwoz.

- If I had that can of Flabber Gas.

- No! - You are the worst!

- Charlotte, please pick up my arm

and use it to smack Schwoz.

- Well I would...

but I need my hand to scratch my head.

Because I'm confused...

- Oh god, it's her lecture voice.

- Well if you don't want to listen to my lecture,

you are free to get up and walk away.

- Oooooooo, yas queen!

High-five because we can use our arms!

- Here's what I don't understand...

I thought you guys were superheroes...

with super powers...

- Henry, don't listen,

she's using our words against us!

- Wait, wait, wait, dude she might be onto something.

- God, it's already working!

- I just think that maybe if you guys weren't so cocky

that you would've beaten Barge and wouldn't have ended up

all smelly and flabby on beanbags.

- You don't know that.

- Dude, you know what, she's right.

But what are we gonna do now?

Barge is out there stealing towels

and we can't do anything about it

because we can't even move!

- CHARLOTTE, CAN YOU COME HELP ME b*at THIS GUY?!?

I CAN'T DO IT!

- Flyin' in.

- Dude, before you come into work tomorrow,

I'm gonna need you to go down to the sewer

and look for my car keys. - Dude, dude--

- It's got a Felix the Cat keychain--

- No, dude, Schwoz is making his "idea face."

- He is? That's great! - Yeah.

- Is he making the idea noise? - Uh...

- [ idea noise ]

- He's making the noise dude!

- I have an idea!

- YEAH SCHWOZ! - YES SCHWOZ!

- Charlotte, go get your mooshun capture suit!

- Flyin' out!

- So what's your idea, dude? - Where are you going?

- Where are you going with Schwoz?

- Why are you walking with purpose?

- Schwoz! Schwoz! - Schwoz! Schwoz!

- Well I didn't find my World's Best Dad's Towel towel,

but I did find this bush.

Which isn't drying me at all!

Wait, what are all you damp people doing in my kitchen?

- We're here to buy towels.

That girl said she had towels to sell,

but I don't see any towels anywhere.

[ murmuring ]

- Listen!

I understand your frustration

and I want you to know that your murmurs

are very important to us.

- Hey, there's my towel!

- I'll give you a hundred dollars for it!

- No. This is my towel.

It says World's Best Dad's Towel

and I bought it for myself as a Father's Day gift.

- Do I hear ?

- I'll give ya .

- !

- ! - !

- ! - !

- How are we doing, Schwoz?

- Yeah. Are we paired, yet? Why can't we move?

- What is taking so long?

- It was more difficult than I thought

to modify my Battlesuits to receive a signal

from the suits Jasper and Charlotte are wearing.

- How'd you even do that?

- I could explain it to you,

but Charlotte is the only one smart enough to understand.

- Hey! You think Charlotte's sooo smart?

- Yah.

- Yeah, you're right.

- If this works

then you two can control Captain Man and Kid Danger

just like you controlled the Bear and Hair

in the video game.

- Yeah yeah yeah.

And then they can send us to go find Barge

and make him throw in the towel.

- Oooo. That's good.

Remember that when we get there.

- Ooh. Something's happening.

- Whoah. Oh!

- This is so cool!

- We're one and the same!

- Let's not get carried away.

- Is this a bad time to say I have to pee?

- It's a very bad time.

- Then I will not say it.

- Watch this.

- What?! - This is crazy!

- Wait. These Battle Suits make you super strong right?

- Yeah!

- What are you doing?

- Whoah! - That was awesome!

- Eeeeeee!

- Look at me! I'm a superhero!

Taste my fists and smell my kicks!

- You're not a superhero!

- Raise your hand if you think Jasper is a superhero.

- Jasper, please put my hand down!

- Okay...

- Dangit!

- Ray and Henry should be approaching the laundromat now.

- Yeah, we can see everything

through the cameras in their masks.

- I'm a superhero! Kablam!

- Schwoz, I would like to trade.

I do not want Jasper controlling me anymore.

- Charlotte, walk me over to see if Barge is inside.

- Okay.

- And I smashed everything...

but I still couldn't find anymore towels.

- I can see him! Wow, he's...

he's really talking to a towel, isn't he?

- Yes, your dryness.

- Ray, check it out. Barge is inside

and he's talking to--

- Wooo!

- I hate my life.

- Jasper, quit it.

- Oooh! Is it time for fighting?

- Yes. Now...

last time, we didn't have a plan.

- That's right, Kid, we didn't.

But this time, we do have a plan.

- JASPERRRRRR DUNLOPPPPP!

- This is not the plannnn!!!!

- Sorry to barge in.

- I thought I Flabber Gassed you.

How are you two moving?

- You don't need to worry about that, De'Bargery.

- Yeah. But what you do need to worry about is...

our fists!

- Yeah...

You're gonna need all those towels

to wipe this punch off your face.

- Hhhhnnn! Gah...

- To anyone who's listening--

this would be the part

where we would normally start fighting!

- Oh sorry! - On it!

- No, no, no. You're in the door.

Turn me around.

- I-I'm trying!

- Yes that's it now kick.

He's in front of you, now kick him!

You are on the floor get up.

- Stop yelling at me!!

- Yea yea. He's to your right.

- Now where did they go?

Charotte, can you take control for me?

- Your other right!

- Captain Man I need your help!

- Why? Are we punching a washing machine?!?

- Sometimes in video games there's coins inside!

- This is not a video--

Oh wow, look at that.

- You think you got me?

- Well gas again!

- Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh--

Nope.

- Finish him!!!

- Jasper, what did you do?!? - Sorry!

- Uh, a little help here.

- I'm doing stuff. It's just not working!

- Captain Man, I need help!

- What should I do?

- Grab the can of Flabber Gas and spray Barge in the face.

- Good good. Yes yes. Pick it up.

Just pick up the can!

- I'm trying!

- Jasper what is wrong with you?

- I'm starting to black out over here!

- It's right there! Pick it up!

- Stop yelling at me!

- Boy, if you can just pick up this can

and spray Barge, you will be a superhero.

- I got it!

- Great. Now get over there and spray Barge in the face.

- Eat this.

- Gah! Dangit!

- Sorry!

- Nooooooooooo!!!

- Good job buddy.

- Victory dance!

- No no no!

- I'm a superhero!

- $,. - $,.

Do we hear five? $,.

$, to the man right there.

Do I hear six? Anybody wanna pay $, for this towel?

- $,!

- $, to my dad

who is buying his own towel that's pretty weird.

Do I hear seven? Who will give me seven?

- $,!

- Ah geez, dad.

- Oh man, it feels good to have my body back.

- I'm a superhero!

- Jasper, you gotta stop saying that.

- No I don't-- I'm a superhero!

- $,!

- Hey! We got towels! Who needs towels?

- Wait, what!?!

- Towel shortage is over people!

Thanks to a superhero.

- Noo! Don't take these towels, you do not need them!!

I will reduce the charge!! I-I promise!!

No, I--

I almost had $,.

- Here. Dry your tears.

- Well hello there.

Look at your jaunty crown.

I think I'll call you... The King of Towels.

At your service, m'lord.
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