05x14 - Charlotte Gets Ghosted

[bunniefuu]

[ music ]

- Great party man.

And congrats on that promotion.

- Thanks, pal. Henry? Piper?

Get down here!

Paddle home safely, now.

- You know I will...

Ow!

- Ha ha ha!

- Whoa... your party got crazy.

This place looks like Jasper's house.

- Hey, was that my new kayak?

- It was.

That guy won it during my party.

- How? Playing badminton? - No.

I bet him he couldn't guess my weight

within a hundred pounds.

He nailed it.

- Well, it's my kayak. Is he gonna give it back?

- I doubt it. I don't even know who he is.

Lil' guy just showed up.

- Lotta randos last night, huh?

- Oh, yeah.

But it's not every day I get promoted

from Project Manager to Junior Project Manager.

- That seems like a step down.

- That doesn't sound like a promotion.

- Well if I didn't get promoted

then why did we have a party? Ha!

You can think about that

while you're helping me clean this place up.

- Uh, no, no, no, no...

- Yeah, that's gonna be a "no" from me, dog.

- We party as a family.

We clean up as a family.

- You specifically told us

that we were not invited to your party.

- Yeah, you locked us in Piper's room all night

with two burritos and a gallon of milk.

- Then mom stumbled in later and took the burritos.

- True.

But you know what else is true?

That I don't care.

Boom! Ha! Let's get cleanin'.

- Ugh...

- I invoke The Chore Wheel!

- [gasps] Henry--you fool!

- You sure about that, boy?

- Oh yeah I'm sure.

I'm wheeeel sure.

- Honey? Get The Wheel.

Honey!

- Ah, I'm awake! I'm awake!

What time is it?

- I invoked The Chore Wheel.

- [ gasps ] Henry--you fool!

- I'll spin first.

- How's that burrito?

- It's saving my life right now.

- Come on, come on... No, no, no...

- Eat ice cream!

- Aw, come on!

- How is "eat ice cream" even a chore?

- We got a ton left over from the party,

someones got to eat it. All of it.

- Yeah, that's not gonna be a problem.

- Alright, you're next Henry.

- Okay, here we go, here we go...

Okay c'mon, please no "Clean Up Party."

Or "Read A Book." Or "Gulag" whatever that means.

- Yeah, you definitely don't want gulag.

- No, no, no, no...No!

- "Clean Up Party!!"

- Eat that, sonny boy!

- Yes!

♪ Henry has to clean up

♪ Because he invoked the chore wheel ♪

♪ Henry has to clean up

♪ Because he invoked the chore wheel... ♪

- Guess who's cleaning that up.

- Not me, that's all I care about.

[ all laughing ]

♪ Henry has to clean up

♪ Because he invoked the chore wheel ♪

♪ Henry has to clean up

♪ Because he invoked the chore wheel... ♪

- Great. Now open your mouth!

- Goooooaaaaaaalllllll! - Goooooaaaaaaalllllll!

[ phone rings ] - It's Henry.

You're late. - Yeah, I know.

My parents threw a rager last night

and they won't let me leave 'til I clean it all up.

- You know, you're missing

a lot of important work here, Henry.

- What do you want me to do, dude?

There's tons of party trash here.

- Just use Schwoz's Super Sucker.

- Hmm?

- Just use Schwoz's Super Sucker.

- What's that?

- It's a vacuum he modified

that can clean up any mess in minutes.

- Oh, yeah? - Yeah!

It uses black hole technology to shrink objects

down to the sub-atomic level

and then just sucks 'em right in.

Isn't that right, Schwoz?

- That's how a five-year-old

would describe how it works but yes.

- He says I'm right.

Any-Ray... it shrinks and it sucks

and that's all you need to know.

- Sweet beans. Can you bring it to my house?

- Uhh no, I can not.

- Uh... may you bring it to my house?

Will you bring it to my house?

Please? Simon says? What's going on here?

- Schwoz also invented

an electro-magnetic delivery cannon

that can send objects very quickly

over long distances.

- Or very dangerously over short distances.

- We'll blast it to ya.

- Blast it? - Yeah!

- Okay, uh, is Charlotte there? Because she's normal.

And I'd like to talk to her.

- Sure, I'll put her on.

[ high voice ] Hey, Henry. It's me, Charlotte.

How about those teachers at school, huh?

Real, mean-os.

- Ray, I know it's you.

- No waaaay, it's your bestie, Charlotte.

And I think you should just

let Ray and Schwoz use the cannon

and be thankful they're even giving you the Super Sucker.

- Fire from the hole!

- On its way, kid!

- Okay, when's it gonna get here?

- Probably before I even finish this sentence...

comma...

which is technically still going,

another comma,

because it's taking a little longer than I expected it to--

- Ahhh!

- Goooooaaaaaaalllllll! - Goooooaaaaaaalllllll!

[ upbeat music plays ]

- Henry.

- Ah!

- AHHHHHHH!!! GIVE ME BACK MY FRIEND!

- Wait, wait, b*ating on it won't help.

- Then what are we supposed to do?

Charlotte: Get me outta this thing!

- We don't know how, we're freaking out!

- Okay okay okay okay, we just need--

just need to calm down and deal with the fact

that Charlotte just got sucked into a black hole thingy

and is in that vacuum

and I don't know what else to do let's just b*at it!

- Ahhh!

Give us back our friend!

- How is this helping me?!

- It all just kinda happened.

I wanted an after-school job.

But then, an indestructible superhero

hired me to be his sidekick.

- Ahhh!

- Now we blow bubbles...

and fight crime. Feels good.

[ theme music ]

- Call it. - Up the tube!

- Aw, my boot! - Ha!

- You guys, where am I?

It's hot, I'm surrounded by trash,

and it smells awful.

- Did that thing send you to my house?

- Uhhhh here,

there's a switch that says "Unsuck".

Let's turn it on and see if we can get her out.

- What was that?

Did the vacuum just break?

- Uh...no?

Nothing broke.

Oh my god, it just broke!

- Is Henry doing that thing where he says something loud

and then quietly says the opposite?

- No, no I'm not! That's exactly what I'm doing.

- Alright, we gotta get her out of this thing.

- Yes! Get me outta this thing!

- Okay, I don't know how,

but I'm gonna figure out a way to get you outta there. Okay?

- You better!

I'm sick of being trapped in here.

- What the whole truck-o'-butts is going on?!

- Okay, people have got to stop sneaking up behind me!

- Were you just talking to that vacuum cleaner?

- Ha! Umm--

- Can you not hear me?!

SHOULD I TALK LOUDER?

- No! - Shhh!

- Henry, what is going on?

- Uh well... See I was--

I was--vacuuming with this vacuum...

- That's not our vacuum.

- Yeah, where'd that come from?

- Yea it came from the um...

- And why is it talking?

- Because it's uh...

- Helloooooo?!

- Oh. My. God.

That vacuum is haunted.

- Yes! - So haunted!

- There is a ghost! Inside that vacuum.

I'm just as surprised as you are.

- So surprised.

- Ghosts aren't real.

- What's going on out there?!

- I told you. - No way...

- Okay, ghost...

Henry's mom, dad, and sister just found out that...

that you're here... - Uh-huh.

- In a vacuum... - Uh-huh.

- Bein' a ghost.

- Seriously?

- Y-yes.

They seriously know that you are a ghost.

Inside a vacuum.

Because that's the only possible explanation

for what is going on here.

- Oooooh. I'm a ghost.

- Ahhh!

- I want that haunted vacuum

out of my house right now!

- I'll go throw it off the New Jandy Bridge!

- Yes! - No!

- Well, then we'll burn it!

- No don't burn it!

That's a terrible idea.

- Well now we're definitely going to burn it.

- No, no, no... - What a terrible idea.

- Stop!

That vacuum is gold.

Pure internet gold.

You get me?

- Whaaaaaat are you talking about?

- I'm talking about hiring a ghost hunter to come here,

and then recording them yanking the ghost out of the vacuum.

- Ummm... - Yeah, ummmm...

- We'll have the first proof that ghosts exist.

We put that up on the web...

- We'll be famous...

- We'll be better than famous.

We will be internet famous.

And that is the longest-lasting fame that there is.

- I'll finally be able to quit my new job...

- I'll look up local ghost hunters right now.

I'm sure there's plenty.

- Or, or, or...

orrrr...or....

- Or what?

- If you just let me finish...

Orrrr...

we could call my boss.

- Why would we call your boss?

- Is he a ghost hunter? - Yep.

- Is he? - YEP.

- Well, I don't see him listed on this website

of licensed Swellview ghost hunters.

- Well, that's because he's an amateur.

You know? So he'll do it for free.

You know? For the experience.

- Free? Daddy like.

- Fine. Just get him over here.

- Yeah, I'm calling him right now

don't tell me how to live my life, Piper. Okay?

Hey, ghost? What's it like being dead?

- It's...fine?

- I knew it!

- C'mon, Ray... pick up pick up...

[ phone rings ]

- Rayyyy-llo?

- Okay... um...

I need you to come over to my house,

pretend to be a ghost hunter,

so you can distract my family,

and then I can get Charlotte out of Schwoz's vacuum.

- Is your--

- Yes, my mom is here.

- See you soon!

- Wait wait wait, lemme talk to Schwoz!

- Schwoz!

And I need you to blast me to Henry's house.

- Hello? Schwoz?

- Schwozzzup, Henry?

- Hey umm, I accidentally sucked Charlotte

into your vacuum.

- Just hit the "Unsuck" button. No biggie.

- Jasper and I smashed it.

- Oof, that's a biggie.

- Yeah, can you come over to my house and fix it?

- Yah, yah, yah, just scoop up all the smashied bits

from the vacuum, bring them to your bedroom

and I'll meet you there.

- Okay, okay, cool. Is Ray on his way yet?

- Oh yah yahhh.

He should be there by the time I finish

thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiissss...

- Ha ha ha!

Caaaaaatch meeeeeee...

- Ahh!

- Would it have k*lled you to catch me?

- Yes.

- Yeah you're probably right...

- Okay, attention spans are short--

so I want that ghost outta that suck box in five.

- Henry, get over here and participate.

- Uh yea I'm just, you know, I'm still cleaning up...

remember The Chore Wheel?

- Oh wow, was that today?

- Yeah Mom,

and um I just got to dump these vacuum parts

in the upstairs trash can

it's my favorite one don't ask questions bye...

- I'm picking up a message...

the ghost says that...

Henry's Mom should switch seats with her husband

and sit next to me.

- Go, honey!

Charlotte: Uhhhh, no, I did not say that.

- Oh well then uh it must have been a different ghost.

- So there's more than one ghost in there?

- ...sure.

Let's, uh, hear from a different ghost.

- Okay, I'm a...

different ghost...

what's up?

- This guy's legit.

- Schwoz? Where are you? Are you--

Ahh!

- You got the smashee piece-ees?

- Is that my dad's robe?

- I got bored and took a shower.

- What if my parents saw you?!

- That would have been hilarious.

- Just...

here are your smashee piece-ees.

- Oof.

I'm gonna need some tools.

- Tools? Um okay,

I guess I can sneak into my garage

and get my dad's tool box--

- Relax, I got it.

- Schwoz, did you hide your toolbox in my bedroom?!

- Do you want me to answer that question,

or do you want me to fix the vacuum?

- Both, Schwoz!

- Ahhh.....

Yes...yes...

the spirits definitely want you

to keep giving me a hand massage.

- Fascinating.

- Are there any ghosts from Japan in there?

- I can get you a ghost from any city you want, darlin'.

- I don't think you can...

- Uh, I'd like to hear from the Japanese ghost.

Charlotte: [ sighs ]

Konichiwa.

- Okay, enough!

We're not paying you to talk to ghosts.

- You're not paying me at all.

- Look! I'm gonna hit record again,

but this time I want to see you

rip one of those ghosts right out of that vacuum.

Ya got me?

- Yeah, yeah, yeah, in a couple minutes.

In the meantime...

Who wants to hear from Jamaican superstar Sean Paul?

- Uh, dude...

- I'mmmmm... not actually dead yet, mon.

- Yeah, he's still alive.

- Huh...

- Dude, did you hide anything else in my room, dude?

- Why would I only hide one thing?

- Schwoz, are you close?!

Ray is dying down there

and Charlotte is running out of ghost voices.

Charlotte: Yeehaw! I'm Janey, the dead cowgirl!

You can't see me,

but I'm a riding a pretty ghost pony, y'all.

- Wait--Janey the cowgirl's not dead.

- Just--did you fix the vacuum piece or not!?

- Yah yah yah. It's finished, here.

- Yeah, yeah okay.

- Now, go downstairs,

and when no one is looking, you---

- Ow, this thing's getting kinda hot, dude...

- Yah, the piece-ees were too smashied for me

to fix the cooling system.

- What? Wait, so it's gonna get hotter than this?

- Yah, and eventually it will melt or catch fire

and Charlotte will be stuck in that vacuum

until I can order a new part from China.

- What?! How much time do we have?

- Like, four minutes,

unless you drop it on the ground or something.

- Too hot!

- You have two minutes.

- What are you doing?

Stop playing taco taco turkey

and put that back on the vacuum downstairs.

- Yeah well, how are we supposed to when it's so hot?!

- Wait no no no, dude! Don't put it on my bed!

- It's too hot. - You can't just put it...

- How about you touch it... - You're gonna catch it...

- It's a very nice duvet.

Very comfortable to sleep on.

- Just use these oven mitts!

- How many things do you have hidden in my room, dude?

- Wouldn't you like to know...

- YES.

- You only have seconds left

before that part melts

and Charlotte is stuck in that vacuum for - weeks

while I wait for the part to arrive from China.

- A soda fountain?

Dude, that takes pipes and plumbing

and when did you do all this?!

- ......

...

- Let's go!

- Ahhhh!

- [ laughs ]

- So what you're saying,

ghost of William Shakespeare...

is that writers are garbage,

and actors are the real heroes.

Charlotte: Yes, actors are the real heroes.

- Truest word I've ever heard.

- Far superior.

- Dude, they're too close to the super sucker.

How am I supposed to get this thing on the vacuum

without anybody seeing me?

- I have a plan to make them close their eyes.

- Don't take your pants off.

- Okay I have another plan to make them to close their eyes.

EVERYBODY CLOSE YOUR EYES!

- What are you doing--

- CLOSE YOUR EYES,

IT'S IMPORTANT THAT YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES! CLOSE YOUR EYES!

LISTEN TO ME! BUT DON'T LOOK AT ME

BECAUSE YOUR EYES SHOULD BE CLOSED!

- What are you talking about?

- Umm...

- No, Jasper's right! Everybody close your eyes!

The ghost is about ready to come out.

- Which one? William Shakespeare?

Janey the cowgirl?

The Japanese ghost that could only say "konichiwa?"

- Yeah, I thought she'd be able to say more than that.

- Just--everybody close your eyes!

- I don't wanna close my eyes.

I want to see the ghost come out.

- If you don't close your eyes

the ghost will steal your soul!

- No way...

- YES WAY I WILL STEAL YOUR SOUL

NOW JUST CLOSE YOUR DANG EYES, PIPER!

- It knows my name!

- I ALSO KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE NOW CLOSE YOUR DANG EYES!

- Okay...

now everybody keep your eyes shut

until I tell you to open them.

- That's right keep em, closed!

- What was that?!

- Ahhh!

- It's the ghost! I'm bringing it out now.

Everybody keep your eyes closed

until I tell you to open them.

[ air hissing ]

[ all screaming ]

Don't open your eyes!!!

Nobody open your eyes,

there could still be more ghosts in there!

[ machine humming ]

- Oh god no!

[ machine humming ]

- And three...

two...

one...

- Is it over?

- Are the ghosts gone?

- What happened to my phone?!?!

- Those are all...

great questions.

But I am actually late for my next...

ghost thingy so...

This house is clean.

- Uh...the ghosts are gone. That's gooood.

- No it's not!

My phone is fried

so I don't even have any video of the ghosts!!!

- And the house is dirtier than it was before.

Who's gonna clean this up?

- I invoke the Chore Wheel!

[ all gasp ]

- Dad--you fool!