04x15 - Pirated Away

[bunniefuu]

SOFIA: I was the girl
in the village, doing all right

Then I became a princess overnight

Now I gotta figure out
how to do it right

So much to learn and see

Up in the castle with my new family

In a school that's just for royalty

A whole enchanted world
is waiting for me

I'm so excited to be

CHORUS: Sofia the First

SOFIA: I'm finding out
what being royal's all about

CHORUS: Sofia the First

SOFIA: Making my way
it's an adventure every day

CHORUS: Sofia
SOFIA: It's gonna be my time

CHORUS: Sofia

SOFIA: To show them all that I'm

ALL: Sofia the First

[SOFIA READING]

PRINCESS AMBER: Oh,
this is so frustrating.

I've been waiting
for this day all year,

and now it's ruined!

What's so special about today?

Tonight is the Minotaur meteor shower.

It's the biggest meteor shower
of the year.

A meteor shower?

You mean sh**ting stars?
Can I watch with you, Amber?

Not unless these clouds go away.

What if we went sailing
to find clear skies?

Look out in the distance.

PRINCESS AMBER: Oh! The Cloudless Sea.

Great idea, Sofia.

The skies are always clear there.

Let's go ask Mom.

Oh, do we have to?

Of course. I'm sure she'll say yes.

No. Absolutely not.

-No?
-Told you so.

No matter what I ask,
she always says no.

Amber, wait.

Mom, she really wants to see
the Minotaur meteor shower.

It only comes one night a year.

I'm sorry, but I can't let you go
on a sailing trip

by yourselves at night.

But we're older now,
and much more experienced.

We've been on lots of adventures.

I think we can handle
a little sailing trip.

[CHUCKLING]

You're not as grown up as you think.

-But Mom...
-I'm sorry Sofia.

[SIGHING SADLY]

Amber is going to be so disappointed.

She does this to me all the time.

Mom's just trying to protect us.

I don't need protecting,

and I'm tired
of being told what to do.

She treats us like children.

Well, we are children.

We're old enough to do things
without constant mothering,

especially from someone
who isn't even my real mother.

But she is your real mother,

just like Dad is my dad.

-[KNOCK AT DOOR]
-QUEEN MIRANDA: Amber.

Oh! Girls, I've been thinking.

I was worried
about letting you go alone,

but what if I go with you?

We could have a nice day on the water,

and then we could watch
the meteor shower when it gets dark.

Great idea, Mom. Right, Amber?

All right, if that's what it takes.

[BELL DINGING]

There it is! The Cloudless Sea.

Oh, meteor shower, here we come!

[GASPS]

Uh, sorry, girls, change of plans.
Hold on.

Coming about.

Wait. Where are we going?

That looks like a ship in trouble.

I see the ship,

but I'm really not seeing
the trouble part.

I think they're stuck on a reef.

Girls, what's the number one rule
of the sea?

Always help a ship in need.

Very good, Sofia.

But we don't know they're in trouble.

They're not sending out a signal.

It never hurts to check.

Sometimes people
are afraid to ask for help.

Or maybe they don't need help.

MAN IN DISTANCE: Help!

Ahoy there!

Help!

Here, put your life vests on.

[BELL DINGING]

QUEEN MIRANDA: Ahoy there!
Are you in trouble?

Can't you see?
We be stranded on a reef!

Can we give you a tow?

What? I already have ten toes.

I don't need any more!

Mr. Captain, what my mother meant was,

can we pull your ship free?

Finally, a helpful idea.

Sofia, take the wheel.

I'll throw you a line!

Mother, are you sure about this?

Amber, it's our duty to help.

We'll just pull them free
and be on our way.

Catch!

Now, take the line,
and attach it to the cleat on the bow.

The what on the where?

What's she talking about?

The cleat. Up front the bow.

You heard the lady. Tie it up there!

Aye, aye, Captain!

Good. Now, as soon as you're free,

cast off the line!

CAPTAIN QUIVERS: There she goes!
There she goes!

Yes, you've got it! Now cast the line!

Crash the swine!

Trash the grime!

Blast the mine!

Mom, I don't think they've got it.

Captain, jibe to port. Jibe to port!

Stop talking gibberish.

I can't understand ya.

Turn left!

Now look what ya done.

You've wrecked our ship.

Your ship is fine. We are sinking.

Well, you should've watched
where you were goin'.

Girls, up here. Be careful.

Ya best come aboard, me hearties.

Mom, what should we do?

We have no choice.

We have to abandon ship.

PRINCESS AMBER: Unbelievable!

This day is totally ruined.

Now our boat is sunk,

and I'll never get to see
the meteor shower.

All because we had to stop and help
a bunch of clumsy...

Yes, indeed.

Pi-ra-tes.

I think he means "pirates."

Sofia, Amber, get behind me.

-Listen, Captain...
-Quivers.

Captain Quivers,
we don't want to be in the way,

so if you could just
sail us back to Enchancia.

That won't be possible.

But, Mr. Captain Quivers,
we rescued you.

Nay.

'Twas we rescued you.

You're part of me crew now,

and pirate rule number one says,

nobody gets off the ship
till we find the treasure we seek.

Uh-huh. And how long will that take?

CAPTAIN QUIVERS: Hard to say.
We've only been lookin' for 15 years.

ALL: Fifteen years?

Off we go, boyos.

Now soist the hails.

Welcome aboard
the Miss Fortune, ladies.

You be one of us now.

[SQUAWKING] Miss Fortune.

Miss Fortune. [SQUAWKING]

Don't worry, girls.
I will find a way to get us home.

CAPTAIN QUIVERS: Anchors of play!

They don't seem very good at this.

[WHISTLE BLOWING]

CAPTAIN QUIVERS: Ready the net, boyos,

here she comes!

[LAUGHING] That can't be good.

They are the worst sailors
I've ever seen.

Maybe that's how
we're going to get home.

These pirates may not know
how to sail, but we do.

We'll get them to their treasure,
and then they'll take us home.

That could take forever.

There's got to be a better way.

Come on, Amber,
Mom knows what she's doing.

It was Mom who made us stop
and tow this ship off that reef!

Amber, she was just trying
to help some sailors.

These aren't sailors, Sofia,
they're pirates!

Captain Quivers, tell me about
the treasure we're hunting.

We seek the Golden Maiden
of the 17 Seas.

And I think we can help you find it.

Well, we don't be needing your help.

MAN: Wrong way! Look out!

Man in a barrel!

I'll make you a deal.

We help you find the treasure,
you take us home.

My mom is an excellent sailor.

Are you sayin' I am not?

[EXCLAIMING]

POLLY: That's what she's sayin'.

Very well then. It's a deal.

Now cut me down, ya scallywags!

MEN: Aye, aye, Captain.

Lower the mizzen and hoist the main!

Wait a minute!

I be the captain, and I be givin'
the orders 'round here.

Be my guest.

Uh, do exactly what she said!

So, Mr. Captain Quivers,
who is this golden maiden?

She be not a who.

She be a what.

She be an enchanted figurehead.

For the front of the ship?

Aye.

Just say your destination
in the maiden's ear,

and she'll magically
guide your ship there.

So, Captain,
how do you hope to find the maiden?

There be an ancient shanty

that tells where to find
the Golden Maiden.

It were passed down
through the generations

from me great-great-grandcap'n.

So where is the treasure then?

That I cannot tell ya.

But I could sing it.

[SINGING] There are many things
we don't do well

-Can't swab the deck
-Or ring a bell

Or navigate by stars at night

And Wrong Way can't tell
left from right

-'Tis true.
-But all our troubles would be past

If we could find one golden lass

To guide us on our pirate quest

And lead us home at last

[MUSIC PICKS UP]

Ahoy!

We seek a lovely maid

Golden locks and eyes of jade

Many years
we've been searching in vain

Still we sail across the waves

For a treasure that we crave

When we find her
we'll be never lost again

When we find her
we'll be never lost again

Listen well and I'll sing to you

The very firstest treasure clue

Pass the snores of Old Argyle

Then steady on and in a little while

A bigger challenge ye shall face

The kind that sets your heart to race

Stick your courage to the boards

And sail through
the Sea of Lemming Hordes

We seek a lovely maid

Golden locks and eyes of jade

Many years
we've been searching in vain

Still we sail across the waves

For a treasure that we crave

When we find her
we'll be never lost again

When we find her
we'll be never lost again

The next clue is the hardest yet

That leads you to a fearsome thr*at

Aim yer prow, ye filthy rubes

Right through
the Stream of Coating Floobs

And closer now yer treasure be

Where the full moon rises undersea

In the weaving part of the loom

Yer treasure lies within a watery tomb

We seek a lovely maid

Golden locks and eyes of jade

Many years
we've been searching in vain

Still we sail across the waves

For a treasure that we crave

When we find her
we'll be never lost again!

When we find her we'll be never lost

-Though tides will turn
-And ships be tossed

We'll find her and be never lost again

Never lost again!

[MEN LAUGHING]

The words to the song
don't make any sense.

"Coating floobs"?

"The weaving part of the loom"?

I've never heard
of any of these places.

Me either.

This is hopeless.

We're never going to get home.

We have to find another way.

Let's just work
on figuring out the song's lyrics.

They must be clues
to where the treasure is hidden.

What about that boat?

We could sneak off
when they're not looking.

A rowboat? [CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY]

I don't know, Amber.
That doesn't look too sturdy.

Let's just stick to the plan.

The plan is going to take forever.

The meteor shower
will be over by then.

Unless...

There is something familiar
about the Snores of Argyle.

Really?

You know how Captain Quivers
always mixes up his words?

The Snores of Argyle sounds just like
the Shores of Shark Isle.

I think he mixed up the words.

There's Shark Isle right now.

CAPTAIN QUIVERS: What? Where?

Well, blow me down like a feather.

PRINCESS AMBER: And there's my escape.

[GRUNTING]

Don't you think we should get closer,

and sail past the shores,
like the song says?

Ya heard the lady!

Turn this ship, um...

Hard to port!

MEN: Aye, aye!

Port is left! Starboard is right!

Ho, ho, ho, right!

No, left!

Taught 'em everything they know.

[SQUAWKING] That explains a lot.

Let's work on the next clue.

Sing it for 'em again, boyos.

PRINCESS AMBER: Oh, come on.

The wee lass is gettin' away!

[SINGING] The wee lass is gettin' away

Those be not the words.

Those be not the words

No, the wee lass is gettin' away!

Ah, the wee lass is gettin' away.

Bring her in, boyos!

There she goes!

CAPTAIN QUIVERS:
Halt, ya wee piccaroon.

-Oh!
-SOFIA: Uh-oh.

-Oh! Oh, no, no, no.
-QUEEN MIRANDA: Amber!

CAPTAIN QUIVERS: Swab the deck,
ya lassies,

or it's the brig for ya.

Amber, why didn't you
go with the plan like I asked?

We were just starting
to gain the pirates' trust.

Now, I have to go smooth things over.

Captain, you have to admit,

we found the first clue
to the treasure,

the shores of Shark Isle.

-And yer wee lass tried to trick us!
-[THUMPING]

[THUMPING]

What was that?

Amber, you have to listen to Mom.

Mom got us into this trouble
in the first place.

She's just trying to take care of us.

I can take care of myself.

Look out!

Fly fish!

Sofia, you were right.

He's got the words all wrong.

It's not the Sea of Lemming Hordes...

it's the Sea of Swimming Swords.

CAPTAIN QUIVERS: Man your stations!

Hit the deck!

They be rippin' the sails.

I'll protect the sails.
Sofia, steer us out of here.

Got it, Mom.

-Amber, fend them off.
-Me?

You're messing
with the wrong princess!

[MEN YELLING]

Hold that line!

Heave the sail tight!

Aye, aye, Captain Lady.

PRINCESS AMBER: Oh, they're gone.

I think we made it.

We just completed the first verse
of the treasure song.

"Sail past the shores of Shark Isle,

"and through
the Sea of Swimming Swords."

Wasn't that exciting, you guys?

About as exciting
as a cast a sea walker.

I think I've got the next verse, too.

The one about coating floobs?

Coating floobs
is really floating cubes.

Icebergs.

[GASPING] Of course, the Icy Sea.

Steer north by northwest.

Aye, aye, Captain Mom.

But what about the meteor shower?

Amber, you and I will go up
to the crow's nest

to watch for icebergs.

Sofia, stay on the wheel,
and follow our directions.

[CLEARING THROAT]

This still be my ship,

and I still be givin' the orders.

My apologies, Captain Quivers.

Would you rather navigate
the Icy Sea yourself?

Uh-oh. Icy Sea.
Certain doom. [SQUAWKING]

Um, please, be my guest.

And that's an order.

Keep a sharp eye out for icebergs.

If we hit one, it could be bad.

We wouldn't have to go
through any icebergs

if you had just listened to me.

We could have escaped in that rowboat.

Amber, it wasn't safe.

And we wouldn't be stuck on this ship

if you hadn't made us
stop and help these pirates.

Okay, that might not have been
the best decision,

but I'm doing the best I can.

Why didn't you just let us
go alone in the first place?

[SIGHS] I was just thinking
of your safety, Amber.

That's what moms do.

Icebergs!

Dead ahead off the bow!

Head to port!

[BOTH EXCLAIM]

[MEN EXCLAIMING]

-Not good.
-You can say that again.

QUEEN MIRANDA: Starboard!

[ALL EXCLAIMING]

QUEEN MIRANDA: Port!

CAPTAIN QUIVERS: Icebergs dead ahead!

QUEEN MIRANDA: Starboard!

-[AMBER SCREAMING]
-QUEEN MIRANDA: Amber!

Fancy girl overboard!

Wait. Come back. Come back!

-QUEEN MIRANDA: Amber.
-Mom?

Mom!

Here, take my hand.

[BOTH STRAINING]

I'm sorry, Mom.

I didn't mean to act that way.

Sometimes I can be so...

selfish.

I'm sorry.

Oh, I know.

And I'm glad you told me
how you really feel.

[SIGHS] You girls
are growing up so fast.

I guess I need to learn
how to let you.

Sorry I got us stuck on an iceberg.

Don't you worry.

Sofia will turn that ship around,
and be back for us in no time.

Go back into the icebergs?

Go back into the icebergs?

Not a chance!

But Mom and Amber are stuck there.

We have to go get them.

No more icebergs!

Set sail for...

[SOFTLY] What be the next clue,
little lady?

Hmm.

The next clue is to head
for the weaving part of the loom.

You must know where that is, right?

Hmm.

Nobody said anything about a pop quiz.

I'm pretty sure it's a constellation.

But nobody knows the stars
better than my sister Amber.

So, if you want to figure out
the next clue,

you have to help me
rescue her and my mom.

They'll take us straight
to the Golden Maiden.

Just saying.

Oh, all righty.

Have it your way.

And that's an order!

-Bring her about!
-Aye, aye, Princess!

Mom, do parrots live on icebergs?

No. Wait, what?

[SQUAWKING]

POLLY: [WHISTLING] Ahoy there.

Prepare to be rescued. [SQUAWKING]

All right,
let's find that Golden Maiden.

Sing it again, boys.

[BLOWING PITCH PIPE]

[SINGING] And closer
now your treasure be

Where the full moon rises undersea

In the weaving part of the loom

"The weaving part of the loom."

Could that be a constellation?

No. There is no such thing
as the weaving part of the loom.

Oh, but there is
an Evening Star of Kaldune.

Right there!

Well done, Amber.

We'll steer for the Star of Kaldune.

The song says to go
through the whirly burly.

What could that be?

It's an actual part of the ocean.

It's called the Whirly Burly.

You got that part of the song right,
Captain Quivers.

You hear that, mateys?

We got it right.

First time for everything. [SQUAWKING]

But you may wish you had been wrong.

We're going to sail
right between the whirlpools,

and the spinning currents
will sh**t us out the other side.

We're gonna what now?

Are you sure about this?

Amber, are you sure
that's the Evening Star of Kaldune?

-Definitely.
-Then I'm sure, too.

Steady as she goes!

Tell me when it's over.

Oh, look!
It's like the moon is underwater.

"When the full moon
rises under the sea..."

"The Golden Maiden of the 17 Seas!"

At long last, she be ours!

We'll never be lost again.

So do we still have a deal?

Indeed we do.

Take us to Enhancia.

Enchancia.

Enchancia.

Comin' about!

Well, girls, that was quite a day.

I'm really glad you came along, Mom.

So am I.

SOFIA: Amber, look.

The Minotaur meteor shower!

Oh, I forgot all about it.

Wow, look at them all.

Thanks, Mom.

I didn't think this day
could get any better.

I couldn't agree more.