LaRoy, Texas (2023)

[bunniefuu]

Uh, everything okay?

Yeah, my truck broke down.

I wonder if you could

give me a lift.

Sure. Uh, I could do that.

Here.

Bad place to break down.

Is there a good place?

I guess not.

It's a good thing

I was passing by.

Kind of seemed like you were

just gonna keep on going.

No.

Of course now. How--

Well...

can't be too careful.

You worried I was some sort

of deranged maniac?

I...

I-I-I...

I didn't mean

anything like that.

How did you mean it?

What?

How did you mean it?

Well...

guess I didn't--

Didn't mean anything.

Maybe you should.

Should what?

Mean something.

Maybe you're right.

Oh, me, I'm...

I'm just messing with you,

buddy.

Oh, man.

You should see your face

right now.

Oh, man.

Of course,

the same goes for you.

What's that?

I could be the dangerous one,

bro, you know?

Yeah, okay.

Maybe I punched a hole

in your radiator

back at that gas station.

Well, why'd you do that?

I wouldn't.

Of course.

Just for example.

Maybe so you'd break down.

What?

Maybe so you'd break down

and I'd have to pick you up.

Why would you want

to pick me up?

I don't know. No reason.

Maybe so I could k*ll you.

So you could k*ll me?

Not really.

Just saying, you never know.

Maybe someone paid me

to k*ll you.

Who'd hire you to k*ll me?

No one. No one.

Just for example,

maybe your wife.

-My wife?

-Or ex-wife. I don't know.

Maybe she wants you dead.

Don't listen to me.

I'm just making small talk.

Maybe there's a custody battle.

Maybe she doesn't want you

anywhere near her kids.

Maybe it's cheaper

to have you k*lled

than to hire a lawyer.

They're very expensive.

You'd be surprised.

Just... for example.

You, uh...

You need to--

You need to stop this car.

What?

You need to stop

this f*cking car.

Your face.

Yeah?

When?

Where's LaRoy?

Ray!

Ray, over here!

Skip?

Have a seat, amigo.

I didn't know

if you'd recognize me.

I used to hang

with your brother some.

Oh, yeah, right.

We played pool together.

Eight ball, corner pocket,

cutthroat.

Uh, mostly eight ball,

but good times.

He ever mention me?

I don't think so.

Hmm.

Did you send me this?

I did, yes.

Um...

I thought--

I thought it would be best

if we met somewhere discreet.

Do you want something to eat?

-Hey, come on.

-Meet about what?

Um, okay, we can just dive

right in if you want.

Um...

I don't know if you've heard...

but I'm a private

detective now.

-No, I hadn't heard.

-Yeah.

You know, I do big cases,

small cases, medium-sized cases.

And, uh, I was on a stakeout

the other day

at the, uh, Velvet Saddle.

You know it?

Can't say I do.

A little motel

out there past Brillo.

-Hmm.

-Basically a dump.

Um, but people use it

for illicit activities,

including, um...

how should I say it?

Intimate...

rendezvous...

rendezvous of the sexual nature,

if you know what I mean.

Okay, well, anyway,

so I'm on this case.

Divorce case.

Can't tell you who it is.

But...

Unless you want to know.

-No, that's okay.

-Okay.

Well, I'm on this case, and...

I saw something that,

uh, I think...

you might find interesting.

What is this?

Yeah, I was like,

"Is that Stacy-Lynn Wright?

Wait, I know that girl."

And then I was like,

"Hey, isn't she married

to Ray Jepson?"

I'm not quite sure,

because I wasn't invited

to the wedding,

but, yeah, yeah, no,

I know her.

I know what

you're going through, amigo.

I just got out of a, you know,

real serious relationship.

It's tough. At least you--

g*dd*mn it!

Hey! Hey!

Wait!

Oh...

What the hell, Brett?

Oh, I guess you shouldn't have

parked in a handicapped spot.

I wasn't parked

in a handicapped spot.

They don't even have

a handicapped spot!

d*ck!

Assholes.

You know, just because I don't

have a badge, they think that...

I'm not a real detective.

Who was she with?

Who?

Oh, I don't know.

I don't know.

I had to leave before she--

She came out.

She was in there a while.

Why did you take these?

What do you mean?

Why did you take these pictures?

I told you, because

I'm a private detective.

-Did I hire you to take them?

-No.

Did she hire you to take them?

Did she hire me

to take pictures of herself?

No.

Did anyone hire you

to take these pictures?

No. Like I said,

I was on a stakeout.

Right. Well, maybe next time

you'll mind your own business.

How'd it go?

Uh, good.

Yeah, good.

So you think she's got a sh*t?

Oh, absolutely.

Does she have any other talents?

Why? You don't think

she's good?

No, mnh-mnh. It's not that.

Um, it's just...

a lot of the girls sing

for their talent.

Sometimes it's good

to stand out.

Well, none of them can sing

as good as she can.

I'm sure of that.

Uh-huh.

Oh, um, we'll work on some

interview questions next week.

Where the hell you been?

Sorry.

We're gonna be late.

What are you waiting for?

Go!

A beauty salon?

Yes, sir.

It's a lot of money.

Well, it's gonna be

cutting edge.

All the latest styles

and techniques.

We won't just be cutting hair.

We'll be changing lives.

Is that extra?

-What?

-Changing lives?

No, uh, that's included

in the price.

Do you have any experience

running a salon?

Not exactly, but I coach

young beauty contestants.

I'm a former winner myself.

Beaux County, 2008.

Huh. Is that so?

So I know a thing or two

about beauty.

Well, sure.

It's just...

It's a lot of money,

and you don't have

any business experience.

No, but Ray does.

He and his brother

run his family's store,

Jepson's Home and Hardware.

And they've been open

how long now?

What?

How long's the store

been open?

-Forty-three years.

-Forty-three years.

Now, that's got to count

for something.

Sure. Sure.

I'll never forget

the day I won my crown.

Up on that stage.

Lights all shining.

The audience cheering

as they placed it on my head.

It was the happiest moment

of my whole life.

I want to share that feeling.

I want every woman

who leaves my salon

feeling like

she was just crowned

the beauty queen of LaRoy.

That's sweet.

I like that.

You're a lot of g*dd*mn help

back there.

Sorry.

Guess my professional ambitions

don't interest you.

-We'll get the money.

-How?

I don't know,

but we'll find a way.

What the hell's that?

-Hmm.

-Hmm.

Not bad, huh?

Twelve-inch touch display.

Electric wind block.

The wave is ridiculous.

Jeez, how much

you spend on this?

Nah, I got a deal.

Come on, everyone's out back.

Now, Ray couldn't talk to girls.

I mean, like, not at all.

He couldn't say "boo"

if there were a pair of panties

within a hundred feet.

But he had this huge crush

on Sara Fixler.

She was this, uh,

this gothy vampire chick.

So we're at this party,

and Ray asks if I wouldn't mind

talking to her for him.

So I say, "Sure."

I mean, I want to help

my baby bro out, right?

And I swear to God,

that's all I was planning

on doing.

But this girl,

she is a total freak.

And she's so grateful that

I'm just, like, talking to her.

She starts coming on to me.

Big-time.

I mean, she's all over me.

Oh, what-- What was I gonna do?

Right?

Poor Ray comes in, catches us.

And lo and behold,

suddenly he can speak!

He shouts...

You remember what you said, Ray?

It was a long time ago, Junior.

He shouts, "You were

supposed to talk to her,

not finger-bang her!"

God, Junior!

What's finger-bang?

Oh, sweetie, um...

it's kind of like a high five.

Sara wasn't a vampire.

She just liked

to dye her hair sometimes.

I'm going to bed.

Stacy-Lynn.

I'm gonna get that money.

I promise.

You know, everyone thought

Kelly Capshaw

was gonna win that crown.

She was the runner-up

the year before.

Had all the judges

tied around her finger.

But then I played

"American Girl" on the flute,

and it brought down

the g*dd*mn house.

I knew right then

I was going places.

Chad?

I thought we were putting

the display by the register.

Junior said

it looks better here.

But I told you

to put it by the register.

Then Junior said

to put it here.

I told Chad to put the display

by the register.

Hmm, I think it's better

by the doors.

Can I talk to you

about something?

Can it wait? I got a call.

I need money.

For what?

Stacy-Lynn

wants to open a salon.

She's got it all worked out.

It's gonna be real nice.

Well, uh, what can I do

about it?

Tell me, when was the last time

we gave ourselves a raise?

A raise?

Well, we can't go around

giving ourselves raises

whenever we feel like it.

Well...

how much do you make?

I make the same as you, Ray.

We're partners, remember?

How come your house

is so much bigger than mine?

How come you can afford a boat?

I told you, I got a deal.

I'm what they call

business savvy.

That's why I work

behind the scenes

and you manage the floor.

But you're always

contradicting me.

How's anyone supposed

to respect me?

You're right.

You know, I'll go tell Chad

to move the display.

No, no, you go tell him.

Tell him I said it was okay.

It's not about the display.

I need money.

Stacy-Lynn is not happy.

I think she's...

You think she what?

She's just not happy.

Stacy-Lynn?

- Yeah?

- Brought dinner.

Where are you going?

To see a movie.

With who?

Becky.

Why are you all dressed up?

Because I want to look nice.

Is there something wrong

with that?

Do you know

when you'll be back?

Probably late.

Just...

eat your pizza.

Oh, I talked to Junior about

borrowing money from the store.

What'd he say?

It's not a good time.

Jesus.

I'm gonna be late.

I'd like to buy a g*n.

Sure. What kind?

I don't know.

This is a popular one,

depending what you need it for.

Uh, excuse me.

So, what do you think?

I think I need

something shorter.

You're early.

-I am?

-So, uh...

how do we do this, man?

Do we like--

Hey, what's with

the f*cking g*n, man?

Oh, I was just, um...

I don't-- Excuse me.

Here.

- All right.

- Sorry.

That's half, all right?

-Half?

-You can count it if you want,

but it's all there.

Well, half of it's there.

Like I said, it's half.

Listen, man, this thing

is time-sensitive.

That's the main thing.

It's got to be done tomorrow,

or the whole thing

gets thrown off.

I don't care how you do it.

It's just got

to be done tomorrow.

How are you gonna do it?

Hmm? Are you gonna sh**t him?

Hmm? Are you gonna

poison his coffee,

or are you gonna blow up

his car?

Obviously, you're not gonna

blow up his car.

sh*t, man. Maybe you are, huh?

I don't know. You're the expert.

Oh, God.

You know what?

I don't f*cking want to know.

Just get it done,

and get it done tomorrow.

-All right?

-Wait, wait, wait.

I can't do it tomorrow.

What?

I'm busy tomorrow.

What are you talking about?

Look, I-I... I'm...

I'm sorry.

Are you serious? Huh?

Hey, man, we had a f*cking deal.

This is time-sensitive.

I'm sorry.

Jesus f*cking Christ!

They said you were some kind

of f*cking badass!

They did?

Said you were

this scary f*cking k*ller.

You don't look like

a scary k*ller to me.

You look like

a g*dd*mn pushover!

I'm not.

Not what?

A pushover.

Well, which is it, then?

Which is what?

Are you a...

scary f*cking badass?

Or aren't you?

Yeah.

Excuse me?

Yeah.

I am.

Good.

It's got to be done,

and it's got to be done

tomorrow.

All right?

Jesus f*cking Christ.

-How was the movie?

-Jesus!

You scared the sh*t out of me.

What'd you see?

What?

What did you see?

I forgot the name.

I'm going to bed.

He didn't show.

Give a name?

What number did he call from?

All right.

Hi.

I'm here to pick up my car.

It's an '87 Crown Vic.

Two-eighteen.

Two dollars and eighteen cents,

or $218?

The second.

Are you kidding me?

You were parked

in a handicapped spot.

-That was a joke.

-Handicaps use those spots.

I...

Yes, I know that they use

those spots.

I wasn't parked

in a handicapped spot.

That's what I'm trying

to tell you.

The cops, they were just

messing with me.

They don't even have

a handicapped spot,

so how could I be parked

in one?

It's 218.

What...

Sign here.

Where are the tires?

Doesn't have any.

I know it doesn't have any!

I can see it doesn't have

any tires!

I'm wondering why

it doesn't have any tires!

Hey, we got ya!

-Suck a d*ck!

-Whoo!

I don't see what's so important

about a badge.

You know who else wears badges?

Girl Scouts.

You see them out solving crimes?

I seriously doubt it.

Hey, what'd you say

your name was again?

Hey, you made it.

Oh. Yeah. Okay, cool.

See you later!

Damn.

Hey.

Hey, amigo!

Never seen you in here before.

I felt like a drink.

Drink my ass!

You're in here for some action

after breaking up

with that cheating bitch

wife of yours.

Well, you know what?

You're in luck,

because I just happen to be

an excellent wingman.

So, let's see

what we got going on here.

We didn't break up.

And she's not a bitch.

Oh, wait. Let me guess.

she, uh, started to cry,

and then she said,

"It didn't mean anything,

I swear.

Never happen again.

Blah, blah, blah."

Actually, we haven't

talked about it yet.

Why not?

It wasn't a good time.

Well, I would argue that

it wasn't a good time for her

to go screw some other guy.

But that didn't seem

to stop her.

You know, this is none

of your business.

Factually speaking,

it is my business.

Um, although, honestly,

not partial to divorce cases.

Damn it. I gotta go.

Hey, I got you a beer!

Hey.

Who are you?

No one.

Why are you following me?

-I wasn't.

-Bullshit.

Who's she?

Give me those!

Why are you following me?

I wasn't.

Did somebody hire you?

No. No! Ah!

I wasn't gonna do it!

-Do what?

-Nothing.

What are you gonna do? Huh?

What are you gonna do?

Why are you following me?

Who hired you?

Who f*cking hired you?

What the hell, Ray?

I'm sorry, Kayla.

I need to talk to Junior.

Okay, well, he's not home.

Do you know where he is?

Well, it's the middle

of the night,

so if I had to guess,

he's probably out

f*cking his girlfriend.

How'd you find out?

I suspected for a while.

Have you talked to him?

What's the point? He'd just lie.

Well, how do you know that?

Because he's a f*cking liar,

Ray.

Who's the girl?

Jesus. Do you really not know?

What?

It's Stacy-Lynn.

What?

My husband and your wife

are having an affair.

No. No way.

He's probably got his d*ck

up her ass right now.

Stacy-Lynn wouldn't do that.

What, a**l?

Hmm, don't be so sure.

Junior can be very persuasive.

I mean, she wouldn't cheat on me

with my own brother.

Oh, okay, so you're saying

she's home right now?

Want to give her a call,

find out?

He used to be

so much more discreet.

Now he's just getting lazy.

You know...

...I found this in his laundry.

4311.

You're assigned

to a vandalism case.

835 Hatter, do you copy?

10-4.

No.

Why are you

being so difficult?

- I'm not.

- Just sit with us.

-I said no.

-Come on.

I can't. I have to go.

Just come here. What?

Come on. Where are you going?

-How are we doing?

-Fine.

What you got there?

Ah.

It's a police scanner.

Just a little hobby.

It's good to have hobbies.

Keeps your mind active.

I, um...

I noticed those men

were bothering you.

Oh, they get a little

rowdy sometimes.

It's just part of the job.

Why is it part of the job?

I...

I don't know. It just is.

People only see

what we let them.

Excuse me?

If we want people

to respect us,

we need to give them a reason.

Maybe you could

teach them some manners.

-You want me to hurt them?

-What?

Do you want me

to hurt those men for you?

Are you serious?

Isn't that

what you're asking?

People only get away

with what we let them.

But you have to be sure.

There's no changing

your mind on this.

Once you ask me to hurt them,

that's what I'm gonna do.

It's important to finish things

once we start them,

don't you think?

I...

I'd better get back

to the kitchen.

45 to 41,

we got a call about a body

out on Swift Creek Road.

Unidentified male,

late 40s, early 50s.

What's the address?

Unclear.

Witness is no longer at scene.

10-4, we're on our way.

Everything okay?

Yes, sir. You can't stop here.

It's a crime scene.

Gosh. What-- What kind of crime?

-Homicide.

-Sir, you gotta keep moving.

Okay. Okay.

Who's the victim?

James Barlow. You know him?

- No. How did he die?

- Sir!

Lady hit him with her car.

But most likely,

he was already dead.

-g*nsh*t.

-Shut the f*ck up, Potter.

Sir, you gotta keep moving,

all right?

Uh, sure.

You officers have a--

Have a good night.

What the f*ck's wrong with you?

What?

...about your height.

He's kind of like

a gentle-looking guy.

Oh, okay, yeah.

Ray, right?

Yeah, that sounds like Ray.

Oh, yeah, that's--

-He's probably over there.

-Is that the guy?

Where's the money?

-What money?

-The money from the safe.

I don't know

what you're talking about.

How did you find me here?

The name of this place

is on your shirt, Ray.

Oh, God.

-God!

-Don't f*ck with me, Ray.

Do not f*ck with me.

Okay! Okay, okay.

Tell me where the money is.

What money?

Barlow had money in the safe.

Nobody else knew about it, Ray.

I don't know about it.

I said don't f*ck with me, Ray.

-Ah!

-Don't do it!

God!

Uh, Ray?

Can I take my break now?

Yeah, Chad, that's fine.

Okay.

You've got 24 hours

to give me that money,

or I make an anonymous

phone call to the police

and I tell them

who k*lled James Barlow.

All right, Ray?

Miss Jepson?

Yeah?

I'm Officer Stevens.

This is Officer Potter.

Okay?

Hey. Hey, what are you doing?

Get away from there.

Hey, did you hear the news?

What news?

Somebody k*lled James Barlow.

Who's that?

He's a lawyer.

He was actually

at the bar last night.

-Oh, really?

-Yeah.

I thought you might

find that interesting.

And why is that?

Because I saw you

follow him out.

Here she comes.

Thank you.

-I didn't mean to k*ll him.

-You sh*t him in the head.

What'd you think

was gonna happen?

No, no, no. He was attacking me.

So that was self-defense.

You were hired to k*ll him.

That was a mistake.

-How much did they pay you?

-Nothing.

A few thousand dollars.

I didn't do it for the money.

I wasn't even

gonna go through with it.

I just wanted to know

what it felt like.

What?

I don't know.

To not be a pushover.

That's a weird reason

to want to k*ll someone, Ray.

Look, this is a conundrum,

a real conundrum.

On the one hand,

the police would love

to know what I know.

They might even

give me a badge,

make me an honorary

member of the force,

I don't know.

On the other hand...

I still don't know

all the facts.

-Right.

-Right.

Guess there's only

one thing left to do.

What?

I'm taking the case.

What case?

There is no case.

Excuse me, Ray, I think I know

a case when I see one.

This guy hired you

to k*ll Barlow, did he not?

Can you please be quiet?

And Barlow had some money

that he thinks you stole.

-Sure.

-But somebody else must have.

I guess.

Now you have

to find the said money,

or this guy is gonna

turn you in to the police.

Right.

Um, sounds like

a case to me, Ray.

Look, I appreciate it,

but I don't think

I need any help.

Yes, you do.

Skip, please, just--

You need a professional

in this.

You're not even

a real detective.

That's what you think?

I didn't mean it like that.

You know what?

The way I see it,

you got two options.

You let me solve this.

And when I go down

to the police

and convince those assholes

that I'm a real detective,

maybe I'll leave

your name out of it.

Or...

I go down to the station

right now.

Tell them everything I know

about the last known

whereabouts of James Barlow.

Your call, amigo.

I'm looking for a guy.

He drives a rusty brown

pickup truck.

You know him?

Why you looking for him?

It's a private matter.

Sorry, can't help you.

It's important that I find him.

We don't give out customers'

personal information.

I...

Sorry.

Uh... God, this is so

embarrassing.

I was here the other night,

and I think I hit his truck.

No.

I did hit his truck.

I don't usually go

to places like this.

I... I...

I was embarrassed, and I didn't

want to have to explain.

You know,

and I just kept driving.

I felt terrible about it

the next day.

I didn't know

how to get a hold of him.

I'm just trying

to do the right thing.

Can you help me?

Name, phone number, something?

Talk to Angie.

Which one is Angie?

So, this is where he works, huh?

Yeah, I think so.

His name's on the sign.

All right, just follow my lead.

Look, I think it's better

if I just do the talking.

I'm sorry, uh, my secretary

went home for the day.

I'm afraid we had some bad news.

What can I do for you?

-Well, sir...

-Well, you see...

That's actually why we're here.

Do you mind if we ask you some

questions about James Barlow?

I'm so sorry for your loss.

Thank you. The whole thing's

been quite a shock.

Ask him where he was last night.

Did your partner have

any enemies that you know of?

Enemies? No, I--

I don't think so.

-Ask him where he was--

-Shh!

Uh, did you notice

anything unusual?

In what way?

I don't know. In any way?

Not really, no.

Ask him where he was last night.

Just let me do this. I can talk.

I-I-I'm sorry, did you say

you're from the police?

Uh, no, sir.

We're not really here

in any official capacity.

-Yes, we are. We are official.

-No, we are not.

-Why are you here?

-Where were you last night?

Okay, I'm gonna ask you

to leave.

I'm afraid we can't do that.

I'm afraid I'm gonna

have to insist,

unless you'd like me

to call the police.

Um, I understand.

But before we go,

is it okay if I use

your bathroom?

Make it quick.

What are you doing? Get off me!

Get your hands--

-Where's the money, assh*le?

-What are you doing?

This guy knows something.

I can see it in his eyes.

Are you saying something?

I can't quite hear you!

-You're gonna drown him.

-I'm not gonna drown him.

It takes two minutes

for the brain to lose any...

Do you know CPR?

One, two, three, four,

five, six, seven, eight,

nine, ten, eleven, twelve.

Ah!

You okay? You're okay.

-What was Barlow up to?

-I don't know.

Huh? Who is he

mixed up with, huh?

I have no idea!

He doesn't know anything.

We'll see. We'll see.

Where'd the money

come from, huh? Huh?

How did Barlow get the money?

You're gonna drown him again!

Will you relax?

I've got this, okay?

g*dd*mn it!

Oh, there you go.

Yeah. Yeah. There you go.

Get it out. You're okay.

You're okay. He's okay.

Thanks, amigo.

Who wanted Barlow dead?

I don't know.

No, no, no! Okay, okay, okay!

I know-- I know one thing.

I-I-I-- I heard him

talking to a client.

Uh, uh, something about--

about blackmail.

Okay, who was the client?

It's attorney-client privilege--

Okay! Okay!

Adam. Adam LeDoux!

The car guy?

g*dd*mn, we make a good team!

We should think about

partnering up full time.

What the hell was that?

What?

You can't just go around

drowning people.

I'm not "going around

drowning people."

That was one guy.

You could have k*lled that man.

Well, technically, I did. Twice.

But come on, man.

Everything's fine.

He's gonna be okay.

We just got our first lead.

How can you not be excited

about this?

Hello?

Excuse me, I'm here to see

my wife, Stacy-Lynn Jepson.

Come with me.

And you stay here.

Have a seat right there.

Right there.

What are you doing here?

Working the James Barlow case.

-Oh, yeah?

-That's right.

Huh.

I already got a couple leads.

Maybe sometime

we could exchange notes.

Yeah, sure.

I got a note for you.

How about you, uh, f*ck off.

Leave the detective work

to the real detectives.

Hmm.

Mr. Jepson?

Where is my wife?

She's down the hall.

She's fine.

Why is she here?

Do you know a James Barlow?

No.

- Does your wife know him?

- Of course not.

Why "of course not"?

I mean, I don't know him,

so I'm sure she doesn't either.

Why? Who is he?

He's a lawyer.

He was found dead this morning.

Run over and sh*t in the head.

Run over?

And sh*t in the head.

Well...

I don't understand.

What does this have to do

with Stacy-Lynn?

That's what we're trying

to figure out.

Mr. Barlow had a photograph

of your wife

when he was found dead.

Can you think of any reason

why this man

might have a photograph

of your wife?

No.

Hmm.

What's he doing here?

Um, last I checked, uh,

I was picking your ass up

from the police station.

My car broke down.

He gave me a ride.

-Why is he dressed like that?

-You know, I'm right here.

Um, this is my uniform,

and my clients expect

a certain par excellence, so...

You look like you're going

to cowboy prom.

Am I dropping you at home,

or is there a motel

that you'd like to go to?

I'll see you later, honey.

Damn, man.

I gotta hand it to you.

Leaving your wife's photo

at the crime scene,

that is some

cold-blooded sh*t, man!

I didn't leave it there.

Okay, Whatever you say.

-Must have fallen out.

-Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Well, either way,

it's nice for you.

Police think she k*lled Barlow.

All you got to do

is let her take the blame now.

That's my wife.

Yeah.

Your lying, cheating wife.

And she didn't k*ll anyone.

No, but she broke your heart.

And in a lot of ways,

that's a lot worse.

I'm not framing my wife!

Okay, fine! It's just a thought.

God, you want to look

a gift horse in the mouth?

Be my guest.

-Do you like camping?

-What?

You know, like tents and sh*t?

'Cause I know

this great fishing place

down by Shafter,

and I was thinking

after we solve this thing,

we should, you know,

go down there for a few days.

What are you talking about?

I'm talking about camping.

You realize my wife just

got questioned by the police?

Yeah, I know,

that's why I'm saying.

You seem very stressed,

and I think you should take

a little time to yourself.

With a friend.

Just stay here, okay?

I'm not staying here.

You stay here.

This is my life.

Do you understand that?

-Yes, I understand.

-And I don't need you

screwing it up

any more than it already is.

Oh, you think you can do this

all by yourself? Go ahead!

Fishing trip off!

Oh, welcome

to LeDoux Family Auto.

How can we help you today?

I need to speak to Mr. LeDoux.

Well, he's busy at the moment.

Would you like to speak

with one of our associates?

I'll wait.

What the f*ck did you do?

What are you talking about?

Who are you?

Sit.

What do you want?

You asked me to come.

What are you talking about?

The k*lling

doesn't take too long.

Most of the job

is driving around,

sleeping in dirty motels,

eating bad food.

So how I see it,

by the time I got here,

most of the job was done.

It was discourteous of you

not to respect that.

Who the f*ck are you?

I'm gonna ask

some questions now.

Put your hand on the table.

f*ck you.

Why did you want

James Barlow k*lled?

I didn't...

You piece of sh*t!

You k*lled him?

No!

I swear to God!

I paid--

I paid someone to do it.

What the f*ck were you thinking?

Put it back.

f*ck you!

Who k*lled James Barlow?

Who the f*ck are you?

Thing of beauty, ain't she?

450 horsepower.

Premium leather interior.

Ultra premium sound system.

I might be able

to get you a deal.

I know the boss.

Adam LeDoux.

I'm not buying a car.

Excuse me?

I'm not here to buy a car.

Okay, then, uh,

what can I do for you?

I'm here about the blackmail.

Get out before I break

your g*dd*mn neck.

-No, no, no, sir, please--

-Get out!

How'd it go?

He said to come back later.

Later? When later?

Can we just go talk

to someone else?

Who? We don't have

any other leads.

I don't know.

You're the detective.

Oh, now I'm the detective.

Oh, sh*t...

Where's my g*dd*mn money?

Nice work, Ray.

Where the hell you been?

I've been sitting around

in my underwear like an assh*le.

The police just brought me in

for questioning.

About what?

Some guy got sh*t last night.

-Who?

-Some lawyer.

Never met him in my life.

Someone k*lled him

and broke into his safe.

Well, how much did they get?

How do I know?

Whoa, what's this got

to do with you?

He was carrying around

a picture of me

when he d*ed.

What kind of picture?

A picture me

walking into this sh*thole.

What? Why?

Hell if I know!

Well, what'd you tell

the police?

I didn't tell them anything.

What could I tell them?

Well, you didn't say anything

about me, did you?

A dead man is carrying around

a photograph of me,

and you're worried

about yourself?

N-No, of course not.

Come on.

Does Ray know?

I don't know.

He was acting all weird.

He didn't say nothing.

You think you can thr*aten me?

No, no, no, sir,

I wasn't trying to thr*aten you.

You think you can come

in my place of business

and thr*aten me?

You said not to talk.

-Where's my money?

-We don't have it.

- Well, who does?

- We don't know.

The hell you don't.

You got about three seconds

before I-I start...

Oh, g*dd*mn it!

Is everything all right?

Everything's fine, sweetie.

We're just having

a little meeting.

-You want some coffee?

-No, no, no.

We're fine. Just go inside now.

I'll be right in.

All right.

Who are you?

And don't bullshit me.

Am I allowed to talk?

Easy!

I'm just getting my cards.

- Private detective?

- That's right.

You need security,

executive protection.

You give me a call.

You spelled "detective" wrong.

Son of a bitch.

Who do you work for?

We don't work for anyone.

Well, then, what's

your interest in this?

The police think that my wife

had something to do

with James Barlow's death.

- Did she?

- No!

She never even met him.

Look, we just want to get to

the bottom of this, that's all.

How much do you know?

We know that you were

being blackmailed,

and that James Barlow

got k*lled because of it.

Hell, I didn't have anything

to do with that!

Now, I've got plenty

of witnesses that can tell...

g*dd*mn it!

-I said no coffee.

-Well, it's for them.

Okay.

Thank you.

Mm! Thank you, ma'am.

Go back inside now, sweetie.

Let us finish our meeting.

Well, now, do you need

anything else?

We're just fine.

I'll be in in a minute.

My wife.

This whole thing's

been damn hard on her.

Look, anything you could tell us

will be helpful.

A few months ago,

I had an affair.

There was this...

woman.

She was young and attractive,

and I was stupid.

Well, I felt guilty as hell.

But when I tried to call it off,

she decided to blackmail me.

Said if I didn't pay her

$250,000,

she was gonna tell

about the affair.

- So, what'd you do?

- Well, what could I do?

I told my wife.

we thought it would be better

just to pay the money.

But if she knew

about the affair,

then why did you pay her?

People know me.

I'm a family man.

Hell, it says so

on the damn sign.

"LeDoux Family Autos."

That matters to people.

Folks come here

because they trust me.

I mean, what are they gonna say

if they think I'm some kind

of g*dd*mn philanderer?

Well, when did

the lawyer come in?

He was supposed

to give the girl the money.

But before he could,

some assh*le m*rder*d him

and broke open his safe.

Well, who else

has the combination?

How do I know?

Hell, you're the g*dd*mn

professionals.

You tell me.

Do you think you, uh...

You think you can find

the money?

I guess we should talk

to this girl first.

What's her name?

Angie.

At least that's what she said

her name was.

She's an exotic dancer

over at the, uh, Sunset Lounge.

g*dd*mn it!

Redhead? Great ass?

Yeah. You know her?

Yeah, I know her.

This is the serious

relationship?

Yep.

What happened?

Um...

I just needed

to focus on my career.

Kind of broke her heart,

I think.

And, uh, I just...

I just hope she's over it,

that's all.

Hey! What the hell, Angie?

- Who's that?

- It's me!

-Skip?

-Yes!

Don't mind the mess.

Who the hell is that?

That's Brian.

That's the guy who hired me.

Wait. "Brian" Brian?

The guy you dumped me for?

Wait, I thought you said

you broke up with her.

Ha! I went out with him one time

because I felt sorry for him.

I can't believe you ditched me

for this guy.

-He looks like an assh*le.

-He was an assh*le.

But at least he didn't dress

like Howdy f*cking Doody.

What happened to him?

He got sh*t.

- I can see that. Who sh*t him?

- I don't know.

I was too busy getting the sh*t

kicked out of me.

God, I need a cigarette.

Angie, where's the money?

What money?

Cut the bullshit.

We talked to LeDoux.

He told us all about

your little blackmail scheme.

You don't know a damn thing.

Oh, I do. I think I know a lot.

Oh, yeah?

Well, how about this?

I didn't blackmail LeDoux.

He hired me.

Hired you for what?

He was a regular at the club.

I used to give him

private dances.

You were sleeping with LeDoux

while we were together?

We were never together,

first of all.

Second, I never slept

with LeDoux.

What do you mean?

Who the f*ck is that?

Wait, what do you mean

you never slept with LeDoux?

I mean I never slept with him.

He had this plan

to get $250,000.

Said he'd give me 10%

if I pretended to blackmail him.

Wait, blackmail himself?

That doesn't make any sense.

It does if it's not his money.

Which it wasn't.

He likes to pretend

he's all important,

but his wife's the rich one.

Some kind of heiress

or something.

I was supposed to pretend

like I was blackmailing him,

and when she paid, I was

supposed to give it to him.

So, what happened?

Dipshit over there

is what happened.

He decided 10% wasn't enough,

so he found someone

to k*ll the dude's lawyer,

take the whole damn thing

for himself.

But then he goes

and hires the wrong guy.

Gives the payment

to some f*cking imbecile

from the hardware store.

Next thing I know,

real k*ller shows up at my door.

Guy's some kind

of g*dd*mn maniac.

What did he want?

He wants the money.

All of it.

Says he's owed for his troubles.

Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Wait, where are you going?

-To find Stacy-Lynn.

-What? Now?

Did you not see inside there?

This guy's a maniac.

Yeah, who cares? All we have

to do is find the money first.

I don't care about the money.

I only care about my wife.

What do you think it means?

I think Ray had something to do

with him getting k*lled.

Come on. Ray?

He's got the man's name

and address

along with a pile of cash

shoved in his underwear drawer.

You got a better explanation?

Maybe he's holding it

for a friend.

No, Ray doesn't have

any friends.

Well, yeah.

But how much is it?

A few thousand.

You think it's the money

from the safe?

Maybe some of it.

It just doesn't seem like enough

to k*ll somebody over.

Well, where's the rest?

Stacy-Lynn!

Stacy-Lynn!

Stacy!

She's not here.

- I'm sure she's fine!

- I have to find her.

I have to get her out of town

before something happens to her.

How do you know

she'll go with you?

- What?

- You're leaving town?

How do you know that Stacy-Lynn

will go with you?

She's my wife.

Exactly.

She hasn't been

the most loyal person.

What are you gonna do?

You just tell her what happened,

she's gonna drop everything

and run away with you?

I should have just

k*lled myself.

Man, you got to stop it

with these sad mopey routine.

Chicks don't like it.

How do you know what they like?

Well, I know they like

a man who's assertive.

I know they don't like

some sad sack

who goes around talking about

his ex-wife all the time.

She's not my ex-wife.

Whatever.

Look, you know what?

I think this is the best thing

to ever happen to you.

Mm-hmm. Okay, did you

accidentally sh**t a man?

Yes. Did you do a terrible job

at trying to hide the body?

Also, yes.

But if you hadn't,

we wouldn't have teamed up

and had this

kick-ass adventure together.

Come on, man!

We're, like, finding clues

and solving crimes

and making memories.

Why does Junior

get whatever he wants?

Why can't I just get one thing?

Let me tell you something

about your brother.

He's an assh*le.

He's always been an assh*le.

You're twice the man he is.

Yeah!

Look, I know what it's like

to not be taken seriously, okay?

I know people laugh at me.

Don't respect what I do.

But that's about to change

for the both of us.

When we find that money,

we're gonna be heroes.

LeDoux might even

throw in a reward.

Stacy-Lynn, she's gonna

crawl back to you

and beg for forgiveness.

Trust me, man.

Now I'm gonna go take a piss.

And when I'm done,

we're gonna go out

and solve this thing

because we're this close.

I can feel it! Come on! Yeah!

Yes!

What'd you do?

I don't know!

Wait, who are they?

They work for Mrs. LeDoux.

She wants to talk to us.

Okay. Sorry. My bad.

Sorry.

Sit.

Oh, do you have

anything to drink?

-Sit the f*ck down.

-Right.

Oh, thank you for coming.

Can I get you

something to drink?

Yeah, I would, actually...

They're fine.

Elijah, what happened

to your head?

Oh, um, there was a slight

misunderstanding.

Oh! Well, what kind

of misunderstanding?

Well, ma'am,

Elijah here thought

that he wasn't a little bitch,

and I thought he was.

I understand you're working

with my husband.

We... have similar interests.

And have you found

anything interesting?

We haven't

found your money,

if that's what you're asking.

We're still trying to figure out

who broke into Barlow's safe.

That was me.

Excuse me?

I'm the one that broke

into the safe.

That's why I asked you here,

'cause I thought

that might help

with your investigation.

Oh, so you have the money?

Oh, no.

Uh, the safe was empty,

unfortunately.

Well-- Well,

I don't understand.

My husband has certain...

weaknesses.

In his case,

it's women and, uh, gambling.

I've, uh--

I've paid off his debt

more times than I can count.

My daddy left me

a large inheritance.

But there's a limit, and...

well, finally, I...

I had to cut him off.

So he concocted this ridiculous

blackmailing scheme.

So you knew

he wasn't having an affair?

Well, not at first,

but eventually.

And I didn't want

another fight, so...

I tried to take

the money back myself.

I-I asked Elijah and Felix

to break

into Mr. Barlow's house.

But like I said before,

the money wasn't there.

Well, where was it?

I wish I knew.

I-- I would appreciate it

if you could keep

this all discreet.

Oh, ma'am, we--

We're known for our discretion.

Why do you put up with it?

I beg your pardon?

Why do you let him

make you look like a fool?

Don't you get sick of that?

Hey, mind your own business!

No, it's okay.

Of course I do.

But he's my husband.

Eventually, he's gonna

tire himself out

and come back to me

like he always does.

And I'll be here.

Don't you ever think

that you deserve better?

What's deserve

got to do with it?

I'm just trying to get whatever

scrap of happiness I can

in this life.

I stopped believing

in fairy tales a long time ago.

So LeDoux hires Angie

to fake like

she's blackmailing him.

But Angie's assh*le boyfriend,

he wants to keep the ransom

all to himself.

So he hires you to k*ll Barlow

so he can keep the money.

Meanwhile, Mrs. LeDoux

has already broken

into Barlow's safe,

and the money isn't there, so...

who has the money?

Maybe no one.

I know where the money is.

This is where he parked.

[Skip Yeah, so what?

So he had a briefcase,

but he didn't take it

into the bar.

What, you're telling me

he had, like, $250,000

he just left in his car?

I'm telling you,

I think that he knew

I was following him.

Yeah, okay, well,

it's not here now, so...

I got to take a leak.

Oh, sh*t!

What?

Coming?

That's it.

You got it?

Yeah, I got it.

-Do you got it?

-Yeah, I got it.

Ass!

What are you doing?

Where are you going?

No!

Yeah!

Hoo!

Are you kidding me?

Who's the detective now,

Brett, huh?

Who's the g*dd*mn detective now?

Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!

Yeah!

What are you doing?

We can't turn it in.

Yeah, of course we can.

We found it first.

It's the only way.

Way for what?

That she'll go with me.

Stacy-Lynn?

Wait, you're gonna screw me over

for that bitch?

-Don't call her that!

-Hey, you know what?

It's time you heard

the hard truth, amigo.

Stacy-Lynn doesn't love you.

She probably never did.

And 250,000 cash

is not gonna change that.

-You don't even know her.

-Oh, I do.

I-I see people like her

every day.

I'm probably an expert.

And you know what?

You're better off without her.

You don't know anything.

You only date strippers,

and even that

you have to lie about.

You wouldn't even be out here

if it wasn't for me.

You think you could have

found this all by yourself?

Huh? You're not even

a detective.

Neither are you!

You take dirty pictures!

You think that makes you

a detective?

It doesn't.

It makes you a joke.

Well...

Man...

I thought we were friends.

We're not.

I never asked you

for your help.

She was a beauty queen.

She could've had anyone,

but she chose me.

Why? Hmm?

Ever ask yourself that?

Why'd she choose you?

Ray?

Where are you?

Where are you?

I got the money.

What?

For the salon.

I got the money.

I told you I'd get it, didn't I?

Ray, where are you?

Baby, I have so much

I have to tell you,

but I can't do it

over the phone.

Where can we meet?

At the house.

Yeah.

All right.

I'm heading there now.

I'll see you soon.

I love you.

Why is he here?

I was worried about you,

baby bro.

I don't need you

to worry about me.

Ray, we're both worried.

I found this.

I was gonna tell you about that.

- We just want to help.

- No, I don't need your help!

Stay out of this!

I got the money for us.

I got the money.

I love you.

I love you, Stacy-Lynn.

I love you too.

Okay? And...

We did this for you.

Did what?

Did what, Stacy-Lynn?

Stay strong, honey!

41 to 45.

Go ahead.

Got the suspect in custody.

We're on our way in.

I know who k*lled James Barlow.

Have a seat. Someone will be

with you to take your statement.

I don't want

to make a statement.

I solved the case.

What is this guy doing?

Like, is he serious?

Oh, come on! Jesus!

Are you kidding me?

-You got this?

-Yeah, I got this.

I got an officer down.

Hey, what's going on?

Driving a white sedan

with Nebraska plates.

14-11, 14-11.

Road needs to be closed

at 264...

Oh, hell, yeah.

There's some g*dd*mn

detective work right there.

Junior!

Junior! Where is he, Kayla?

He's gone.

-Gone? Gone where?

-"Gone" Gone.

He left me.

-What?

-Didn't you hear?

He and Stacy-Lynn,

they're in love.

They're running away together.

Running? Running where?

I mean, what about Olive?

What about you guys?

What about--

What about the store?

Store's done.

What are you talking about?

Jesus, Ray, how stupid are you?

Junior's been stealing

from the store for years.

How do you think he can afford

this house, huh?

How do you think he bought

a g*dd*mn boat?

Skip?

Do you have the money?

Where's Skip?

He's here.

Do you have the money?

I can get it.

All right.

That's right.

How's that? Yeah!

Whoo!

You like that?

Yeah!

There's more

where that came from.

- Whoo!

- Yeah, there is.

Whoo!

- Jesus!

- Ah!

-Ray?

-Ray? How'd you--

Hey, take a deep breath, okay?

You sure you know

how to use that thing?

Ray!

Ray, please, no.

I want a divorce.

Can I ask you something?

Okay.

Why'd you marry me?

I don't know.

I think I just stopped

believing in myself.

Yeah, stop the car.

Is that it?

Yep.

Bring it over.

Let him go first.

Go on.

You okay?

Yeah, I'm great.

Sorry.

Whatever.

Bring it over.

No.

Give it to me.

What are you doing?

Give it to him.

No.

He's not leaving here

with this money.

You are.

-Ah!

-Ray!

Ray, come on, come on, come on.

Climb out.

You go.

No. We got to get you

to a hospital.

I'll be fine.

I'm not going without you.

You're bleeding out.

I'm sorry I said

we weren't friends.

I don't care about that.

You're a great detective.

Give the money to the police.

Tell them everything.

Ray.

I'll be okay.

I'm okay.

He's still breathing.

Where's the cowboy?

Gone.

Does he have the money?

If I let you go,

will you leave town?

Why?

Because it's important to finish

things once we start them.

It's all right.