- Do you wanna
ask me something?
- Say something, quick.
- Kennedy,
the festival celebrating
the harvest
of Swellview's famous
SwellMelons is coming up.
- Kennedy,
the festival celebrating
the harvest
of Swellview's famous
SwellMelons is coming up.
I was wondering if you would--
- [farts]
be my--oh, gross.
Miles, did you just fart?
- I had to hold it in
while I was asking my own date
to SwellMelonFest.
- Shh!
- Hey, can you guys
keep it down?
- [gasps loudly]
- [gasps]
- I'm trying to hide here.
- From what?
- Well, my mom is trying
to set me up with a date
for SwellMelonFest,
but the girl she picked
is pretty cringe.
- Oh, my God, be quiet.
Bose is gonna say all of this.
- Oh, my God, be quiet.
Bose is gonna say all of this.
And by this, I mean that
I also don't have a date
for SwellMelonFest.
- You guys got dates
for SwellMelonFest yet?
- Uh, yeah.
- All three of you?
- Uh, yeah.
- [scoffs]
- We already sh*t our
and everything.
- Tell him about it, Miles.
- Ooh.
[chuckles]
- It's time to...
- First off is my date.
She's got a poodle
and loves to doodle.
But that's not all.
Next up is Mika's date.
This hyphenated hunk
is the captain
of the football team
and the wide receiver of
Mika's affection.
And who could forget Scar?
He's trouble, but nothing
Chapa can't handle.
[elevator music]
- Jeepers,
those sound like swell dates.
- And now that you know
who all my friends are bringing
to SwellMelonFest...
- And now that you know
who all my friends are bringing
to SwellMelonFest,
I would love it
if you would--would go--
- Yes!
I'd love to go with you.
Let's stop talking now.
- Thank you.
- I'm gonna go
before Miles farts again.
- It's a sign
of a healthy system!
- See ya at the fest.
- Hey, good job, buddy.
- Pretty smooth, huh?
- We all got dates
to SwellMelonFest.
- Yeah!
You guys know
what the best part
about this moment is?
- Scar's cheekbones.
- Sure, but also that we all
have dates for SwellMelonFest,
and no one can
take this away from us.
- Yeah, I'm gonna have to
take this away from you.
all: What?
- What is that?
- Why do you have that?
- Seriously?
- You heard me.
We all gotta work security
at SwellMelonFest.
all: No!
- You're lucky
that "You Heard Me" mug
was empty, young lady.
- Then why do you even have it?
- Because I knew
you'd all be like, "What?"
And then I'd turn around
with my "You Heard Me" mug,
and it'd be this
absolutely stunning visual gag.
- It was a great gag,
and we'd all be laughing
if we didn't have four
hot dates for SwellMelonFest.
- Eh, you can
go to the next one.
- You know SwellMelonFest only
happens once every 20 years.
- Because SwellMelons
famously only bloom
when Mars aligns with Uranus.
- And this year's crop
is amazing.
[magical music]
- Okay.
Those melons are fresh,
but SwellMelonFest
has been receiving
edible threats all week.
- I think you meant
to say "credible threats."
- No, I meant to say
"edible threats."
Bose is eating one right now.
- These threats are good.
[suspenseful music]
- They look great,
and we'd be eating them too
if we didn't already
have four hot dates
for SwellMelonFest.
- The SwellMelon ball
drops at midnight.
Everyone who has a date
gets a kiss.
- On the lips!
Which means it's legit!
Ow.
[door clicks shut]
- Ray knows
all about SwellMelonFest.
He's been to three of them.
- If Ray's been to three,
and they only happen
once every 20 years...
- Ba--ba--ba--ba--ba--
everybody stop doing math
in your heads.
I'm quite young.
So you find me any hot rocks
in the Man's Nest Diamond Mine?
- There's
a Man's Nest Diamond Mine?
- Of course there is!
It's right next
to the underground river
of yogurt.
all: There's
an underground river of yogurt?
- It's just plain.
all: Oh...
- But unlike plain yogurt,
my beloved Credenza
actually has taste,
which is why
Schwoz agreed to mine me
a heart-shaped diamond
for a necklace
that I shall give to mine love.
- I found you
lots of great ones.
Looksies.
- [squeals]
No.
Poor.
Substandard.
Good, but not great.
- Brrh...
Good try, Schwoz,
but I'm afraid none of these
diamonds are good enough
for my beloved Credenza.
So now I must swing them.
- But they're still
impossibly valuable--
all: [overlapping screaming]
- Diamonds.
- [screams]
- Schwoz, I mean this
in the nicest possible way--
you have completely failed me.
- That was
the nicest possible way?
- [mutters indistinctly]
- Quick show of hands--
who here has ever been in love?
Mm, but did they love you back?
- Does a parent count?
- Kay, that's what I thought.
You see, I actually am in love,
and the only way
to truly show someone
that you love them
is with material things,
and that's why I gotta
get Credenza a necklace
with an enormous
heart-shaped diamond.
- You do realize
that you can cut any diamond
into a heart shape, right?
- [scoffs]
No, you can't.
See, next to my abs,
diamonds are
the hardest substance on Earth.
Oh.
- I did it.
I caught the bucket of diamonds
before it hit the ground!
Every single
one of the diamonds
is still right here!
- We're gonna be rich!
- Rich with love.
- What?
- What are you doing?
- Wee!
- No, no, no, no, no--
- No, no, no!
- Man, I am fun today.
- We work with a child.
- [sighs]
But he's our child.
[electronic music]
- All clear by the
SwellMelonFest Sip-N-Stare.
- You know, the place
where you sip from a SwellMelon
while gazing deeply
into the eyes of your date.
- Also known as a place
where we'd be
sipping and staring
with our dates
if we didn't have to work.
Over.
- All clear over by the DJ,
also known as the place
we'd be dancing with our dates
if we didn't have to work.
Over.
- I'm so glad
we don't have to work today.
- [laughs]
- The only way
this could get any worse
is if we saw our dates
with other dates.
- Then you do not want to look
at the SwellMelon Sip-N-Stare.
- Aw, no sippin' way!
[suspenseful music]
- Those are our dates!
Over.
- Dates are on dates
with each other.
Over!
- I did say
that you shouldn't look over.
Over.
- Well, for the record,
my heart is broken, and
I'd like this day to be over.
Over.
- Cut that chatter, Danger--
gotta keep these lines open
in case something goes down.
- Nothing bad's gonna go down.
It's impossible to be evil
at SwellMelonFest.
- Yeah, there's
too many whimsical rules,
like no eating other fruit,
or always smile
during SwellMelonFest.
- Absolutely nothing bad
is going to happen here.
- Number 18, do you have eyes
on Danger Force?
- I do, Number 1.
Should we att*ck?
- Not now,
but soon.
- It all just
kind of happened.
[overlapping chatter]
You get that?
[vocalizing]
- We look amazing.
- You've been posing for hours.
[all shouting at once]
- That's right,
keep walking, Schwoz.
Keep walking!
- What's good, melon-peeps?
[all cheer]
DJ Melonhead
squeezing out
the sickest beats,
because nothing bad
can ever happen
at SwellMelonFest!
[all cheer]
- See?
Even DJ Melonhead
knows that nothing bad's
gonna happen here.
He's famously pessimistic.
- Hey, my man, can you hand me
that half-empty cup of water?
- You mean this half-full one?
- It's half-empty!
Man, everyone's against me!
[electronic music]
- Whoo!
Let's go, Scar!
- All right, let's do this.
Ready?
[grunts]
[bell dings]
- Whoo!
[applause]
- I think this
might look better with you.
- Okay.
- That should be
my plush melon.
[laughter]
- That should be my jump-hug.
- I'll give you a jump-hug,
sir.
- Hey, Buddy.
- Why are you guys
Danger Force-ing?
I thought you had dates.
- Captain Man thinks
something bad's gonna go down,
so he made us work security
while our dates have
the melonest MelonFest
of all time.
- You're by yourself?
- Yeah, can you change
into Lil' Dynomite
and work security for us?
[all pleading]
- I wish.
My mom finally found me
in that dumpster
and set me up
with the cringe girl.
- [French accent] Buddy!
Ou êtes-vous?
- Oh, that's her.
I just know she'll wanna kiss
after that SwellMelonFest
ball drops--
on the lips!
- Buddy...
- Oh, no, here she comes.
[funk music]
- That's the girl
you think is cringe?
- Yeah.
- Buddy, there you are.
You keep hiding from me.
I love
the little games he plays.
Come, keep me warm
at the Sip-N-Stare?
- Or you could,
like, wear a coat.
- Silly boy.
You will be my coat.
- Buddy Fudgers is gonna end up
getting a SwellMelonFest kiss,
and we aren't.
- Okay, that's it.
I'm done working.
See ya as Mika, kay?
- That's not gonna happen.
- [screams]
- 'Cause there's only two ways
you guys are getting
out of working security--
[phone beeping]
Momentito, por favor.
- Okay.
- Hey, you find me
a heart-shaped diamond?
- No, no,
I didn't find a diamond.
- Hanging up.
- No--hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
I found something else
you need to take a look at.
It's--it's some
kind of cave drawing.
- Look, all I heard was--
[as Schwoz]
"I don't find the diamond.
I don't know where it go.
I am not from here."
Listen, buddy, I love you,
but not like I love Credenza.
- Well, I would hope not.
That would be
highly unprofessional.
- Exactly, so keep mining.
My love depends on it.
- Oh, hey--hey!
D'oh!
[mutters indistinctly]
- Ugh, sorry, where were we?
- Uh, the SwellMelon ball--
- How to get kissed.
- Oh, yeah, that second
"Paddington" movie goes hard.
- Right?
- No, dude.
- Oh, it does though.
- No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
He was telling us
there's two different ways
to get out of working security.
- Right.
Thank you.
One--the SwellMelon ball drops,
and this festival is over.
- But our dates would've kissed
other people by then.
- Two--you catch whatever sicko
has been edibly threatening
this magical day.
What that?
- What?
- Boop.
- Oh.
- [whistling]
- Oh, you are
my squirmy silly boy.
[giggles]
- [weakly] Can't breathe.
- Worst SwellMelonFest
of my life.
- Hey!
This isn't over.
Did "Paddington 2" give up
when that thief stole his book?
- He did not!
- And neither will we.
You heard Captain Man.
If we lock up whoever's
trying to att*ck this place,
we're done for the night.
- And we'll be back
with our dates before
the SwellMelon ball drops.
- Yes!
- Okay,
but how do we figure out
which one of these people
is the criminal?
- We don't have to.
- We just lock 'em all up.
Let God sort it out.
- Wait,
I will not incarcerate anyone
who has not broken any rules.
- Aw, man.
- Wait, no, no, no.
I smell a sick turn coming.
- Good thing SwellMelonFest
has a lot of rules!
- Such a sick turn!
- I smelt it.
I smelt it.
I smelt it.
[electronic music]
- Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
- Hey, Ray,
SwellMelonFest is safe,
'cause we pretty much
locked everyone up
except our dates,
so can we clock out now?
- What?
You can't just lock up
a bunch of innocent people
like that.
You need to let them
back out right now.
[camera shutter clicking]
- And, uh, and--and--and
check yourself
before you wreck yourself,
okay?
Because
when you are a superhero,
you take an unbreakable vow,
right?
To always be
honorable and trustworthy--
- Oh, my God.
- Let me call you back.
- Are you on a date
with Credenza?
- [scoffs]
No...
- Hey, love, I am so glad
you took the day off
from work to go
on a date with me today.
[laughs]
Oh, Danger Force.
Ray, do you know them?
- No.
- No.
- No, but we would love to make
his acquaintance over there
for a moment.
So let's exit.
- Uh...
- Hey, wait,
what is it you think
this guy does for work?
- [chuckles]
He's a fighter pilot
brain surgeon who also runs
a school where injured pets
can learn to surf.
[sighs]
- I keep busy.
[chuckles]
- Get over here.
I cannot believe
you made us work all day
just so you can go on a date
with Buddy Fudgers' mom.
- You seriously
can't believe that?
Sounds like me.
- And you better not say
that you only did it
because you're in love.
- I only did it
because I'm in love!
- That's just what I told you
not to say!
- Oh, Bosey, don't--
don't look at me like that.
- I trusted you.
- I'm in love!
- If this is love,
then why does it hurt so bad?
- Oh, come on!
- [gasps]
- The SwellMelon jail
is now empty.
- Oh, good!
- Not for you, it isn't.
- What's the supposed to--
mean?
You guys are just mean
for doing this.
- Why are you locking us up?
- "No wearing matching
T-shirts allowed"
at SwellMelonFest.
- [groans]
I told you we'd get busted
for these shirts.
- [chuckles]
Worth it.
[chuckles]
- God, I love you.
- Mm, thanks.
- Now that Ray's
out of the way--
- The kids will play.
- I'm happy.
- Me too.
- Nothing's gonna stop us
from kissing our dates.
[rock music]
- Number 19,
are you in position?
- Number 19 is in position.
- Then sound
the Man's Nest alarm.
- Right away, Number 1.
[door clangs]
[alarm blares]
[suspenseful music]
[rock music]
- Oh, you know
how I hate to complain.
But I really wish
we weren't in jail right now.
- Nobody's puts baby
in a cell.
Hey!
[cries] Let me out!
- Okay, let's change
into our normal selves
and get kissed.
- On the mouth.
[phone beeping]
- Intruder alert
at the Man's Nest.
- Isn't Schwoz there?
- Probably jackhammered
the yogurt line.
- So what should we do?
- I can't lightning
my way there.
- I certainly
can't shout myself there.
- I certainly
can't brain myself there.
- Sometimes,
I don't like my superpower.
- Tell Schwoz we said hi!
- [sighs]
Hey!
Wha--get off me!
[grunts]
- AWOL is down.
Start the att*ck.
[suspenseful music]
- Number...20...
here...
- D'you hear that?
- Yeah, it sounded like Miles--
something about Number 20.
- Number 20?
Like that guy
from the Mom Prison?
- Okay,
this is gonna sound crazy,
but earlier today,
I thought I saw--
- The guy from the Mom Prison.
- How do you know?
- He's right there.
Good, he brought friends.
- [groans]
We are not
getting kissed today.
- Oh, yes, we are!
Ow!
[grunting]
Citizens, disperse!
[all screaming]
- You can run, Buddy Fudgers,
but you cannot hide!
[giggles]
- [growls]
[grunts]
[heroic music]
- Aieee...
- [grunts]
- Aieee!
- [sighs]
- Aieee!
- I know that "Aieee" anywhere.
It's Ray!
- Aieee!
- Nope, nope,
that's a Schwoz.
I got Schwoz!
["Aieee" horn blaring]
- Aie--aieee!
- I hope you got a blanket
under that mask.
[both grunt]
'Cause it's bedtime, baby!
[grunting]
- Uh, uh, AWOL--
AWOL!
- Not now, Schwoz,
I'm still flexing.
- No, seriously though,
there's another one--
- Oh.
- Behind you.
- Aieee.
["Aieee" horn blaring]
[suspenseful music]
- Really?
- [growls]
- Okay, you know I love being
locked in fake jail with you.
- Nice.
- [chuckles]
But it sounds bad in there,
and I'm worried about Buddy.
- Don't worry, baby.
Not only am I
a fighter pilot brain surgeon
who also runs a school
where injured pets
can learn how to surf,
but I can also pick any lock.
- [gasps]
- Also I model.
- Oh...
[giggles]
- Kind of forgot
where I was going with this,
but, uh, do you wanna
watch "Paddington 2"?
- That movie goes so hard.
- My God, you're not kidding.
I got it right here.
- Oh.
- Oh, Paddington.
- Oh, he's so cute.
- I don't wanna make it weird,
but if we have kids,
we might wanna
consider the name--
both: Paddington.
- Yeah.
- That's so cool.
- Paddington Manchester.
- [laughs] Oh.
- Huh.
Guess I gotta kick your...
[both grunting]
[heroic music]
- Why aren't they
fighting back?
- Because we're so strong!
- No, no, no.
It's like they're just trying
to keep us busy--
like they're trying
to distract us or something.
- Okay, but from what?
- [gasps]
Miles!
[suspenseful music]
- The prophecy was right.
The sign was
in the Man's Nest all along.
- The prophecy would never lie.
He is coming.
- True.
He is coming.
- We gotta end this
and get back to the Man's Nest.
- I don't know.
Now that Volt picked up
that hammer, she does not
look like she wants to leave.
[slow-motion grunting]
- It's done.
- That does not look good.
- They're gonna blow up
the SwellMelon ball!
[detonator beeps]
[expl*si*n booms]
- Where'd they go?
- They're still here,
but they could be anywhere.
- They could be
any of these people.
- They could be me.
- No, they cannot.
- Oh, thank God.
- AWOL, listen to this--
that guy from the Mom Jail?
He's part of a whole group.
- I know.
There were two of them
at the Man's Nest.
- Fight 'em?
- Yep.
- Did you win?
- I do not remember.
- Okay,
SwellMelonFest low-key stinks.
- [sighs]
- Hey, Danger Force.
- We saw
what you did back there.
- And we thought it was...
all: Pretty cool.
- I mean, sh**t,
if that SwellMelon ball
hadn't exploded, we, for sure,
would've kissed you under it
for protecting us.
[dramatic music]
[lion roars]
[birds tweet]
- [giggles nervously]
Catch ya later.
[overlapping chatter]
[giggling]
Okay,
SwellMelonFest high-key rocks.
- Amen, my girl.
- Other than all that mishegas
with those guys
in the matching masks,
everything just
sort of worked out for us.
- It worked out for everyone--
every single one!
[heroic music]
[suspenseful music]
- [grunting]
[sighs]
[vocalizing]
03x06 - SwellMelonFest
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Series is a spinoff of Henry Danger and follows four new superheroes-in-training, to attend Swellview Academy for the Gifted.
Series is a spinoff of Henry Danger and follows four new superheroes-in-training, to attend Swellview Academy for the Gifted.