07x01 - Man Down!

[bunniefuu]

[Kate] I'm so excited to be in Thailand.

This has been
a bucket list item for years.

The scenery in Thailand
is just massively impressive.

[Ashton] Thailand is a lot of fun,

but also you can get into
a lot of trouble.

[Kate] Another year,
another charter season.

Here's hoping this one goes
better than last year.

I haven't made our department look bad.

But I'm telling you that you have.

We can hope for the best,
but [bleep] happens.

I love my job.

You are gonna k*ll it today.

[Lee] Sometimes the inmates think
they run the asylum.

They need a wake-up call.

Get outta here. Get out of my interior.

This hour of the night,
I don't need to hear slamming doors,

loud voices.

[Ashton] Coming in as bosun,

I'm in a position where I need to lead,

but I'm still gonna have a lot of fun.

[whooping]

[cheering, laughter]

[laughs]

[Kevin] I've been a professional chef now
for 15 years,

and a yacht chef for six.

I think I come off a bit cocky.

[Kate] Kevin, are you almost ready?

I was ready 15 minutes ago.

I've definitely made
a waitress or two cry,

but I think that's all behind me now.

Our mate doesn't know
what she's even [bleep] doing.

♪ My hips are shaking
From left to right ♪

[laughs]

My friends would describe me
as life of the party.

[screeching]

But I think I was a blonde
in my past life.

What happened to my other wine bottle?
Oh, it's in the kitchen.

I mean, in the galley. I mean, pantry.

[Courtney] I hate ironing.

I like yachting, but I don't like working.

I'd much rather be
sipping champagne at the beach,

but I need to make money,
just like everybody else.

I feel like I'm walking 20 miles.

Do you see the penis ravine on Brian?

[Courtney] It's aggressive.

Growing up in South Africa,
I was a wild child.

I got a tattoo below in my stomach
that I don't even know what it is.

I've worked very hard
to get where I wanna be.

But what's life
without having a bit of fun.

[Simone screaming]

[bleep] you! [bleep]! Oh, yeah!

[laughing]

I've always been one of the boys.

People just assume
I'm this weak, small,

goofy girl,

but I love to prove people wrong.

-[Brian] You wanna hook up with Kate?
-[bleep], yes.

The stereotype of Long Island
everyone knows is a FLID,

[bleep] Long Island Douchebag.

Come on, Tanner. Come on, Tanner.

[woman whooping]

My motto is GVO.
Good Vibes Only.

[grunts] [bleep]

[Kate] In theory, it's possible
to be one big, happy family...

[all] Yay!

...but it never lasts long.

[Lee] If anybody here feels
that they can't get along,

go downstairs, pack your [bleep] bags,
and leave.

[Courtney crying]

[Brian] [bleep]! I hate this boat.

Go find another Chief Stew.
I quit.

Cool.

Don't follow me. Don't follow me.

[horn blaring]

[opening theme music playing]

[Lee] All right.

Kate will be nice and sweaty
from the walk down the dock.

[Kate] Hot here.

Thailand is unlike
any other place on the planet.

It's beautiful, the massages are great,

and I also love pad Thai.

Good ol' Valor.

It's like riding a bike,

a big floating bike.

Who the [bleep] designs charts
and doesn't put depths on them?

-Captain, Captain, Kate?
-[Lee laughs]

-How you doing, Kate?
-Good, nice to see you.

So, you ready for this?

Of course.

Wanna see what you got to work with?

We have a new chef.

Okay. Kevin.

[bleep]

He worked on 138 meters.

Wow! That's a lot of food.

Here are your stews. Simone.

OMG. This is nice.

-And Courtney Skippon.
-Great.

Left or right?

No, I think it's left. [giggles]

We've got Ashton coming back as bosun.

-I mean, he kinda earned it.
-Yeah.

I'm gonna go get uniforms and stuff.

-[Lee] Boat hasn't changed much.
-[Kate] No.

She's a comfy old broad.

[Lee laughs]

I can't carry all this. [laughs]

Cha-ching.

This is all right.

-Hi.
-How are you?

Good, thanks. How are you doing?

Courtney, stewardess.

-Simone. Nice to meet you, too.
-Nice to meet you.

-It's hot out there.
-[both laughing]

Sweet, sweet Valor.

Captain Lee, how are you doing, sir?

-Good, bud, how about yourself?
-Very well, thank you.

-See you got both feet.
-I've got both feet,

I'm healthy, I'm strong,

and I'm ready. [laughs]

-Good to see you, pal.
-You, too.

You excited about being the bosun?

Uh, sure.

I'm up for the challenge.

There's 500% more pressure on me

this season than last season.

Last season, I just had to manage myself,

and that in its own is a challenge.
[laughs]

I think Abigail,
she's probably your greenest.

Okay. Is there a picture?

Let's hope she doesn't have red hair.
[laughs]

[Brian] Hey, do you want some help
with your bag?

[Lee] And then we've got Brian,

-he has two years of yachting.
-Okay, great.

-Yes.
-[Lee] And Tanner.

-Right on.
-100%.

-You really have some good talent there.
-Yeah.

We have guests on tomorrow, is that right?

Yeah, we do.

[laughs]

Okay.

Last season,
Ashton displayed some qualities

to make a great bosun.

I expect him to step up
to the plate

and do the job,

because babysitting ain't gonna happen.

-Thanks, Captain.
-We'll try to keep you alive this year.

-[Simone] Where are you from?
-Vancouver, Canada.

-Oh, cool.
-Where are you from, South Africa?

Is my accent that hinting?

Mm-hmm.

Everyone I meet says, like,

"Oh, hold up, like,
what did you just say?"

Like, my lips are moving
super, super, fast, so I'm like...

[guttural sound]
...I can't speak.

-Is this your first time here?
-Yeah, it's my first time.

-Beautiful place.
-Yeah.

-Hello.
-Hello.

Hey, man, nice to meet you. Kevin.

-Uh, chef?
-Yeah, chef.

Welcome aboard. I'm Kate.

-Thanks. Thanks a lot.
-I put you in here

with Ashton, the bosun.

-Okay, cool.
-But you can choose top or bottom.

You guys can fight about it later.

No, I'm like a bottom,

-close to the ground kinda guy, you know?
-Mm-hmm.

If I had a dollar

for every crazy yacht chef
I've worked with,

I would own a yacht
with a crazy yacht chef.

It's very passive-aggressive,

very tiring,
at the end of the [bleep] day.

Communicate with the guests,

or I'm gonna communicate instead.

-Kate?
-Yes, Leon?

I don't like you one bit.

[Kate] But Kevin looks like Tom Cruise
mixed with Hugh Grant.

I'm really hoping that maybe
he's the one to break the crazy mold.

But God just really has
a wicked sense of humor.

I heard you were on quite large boats.



-Wow.
-Yeah.

I've been working on super-yachts
for the last six years,

flying around the world
to amazing locations.

Cooking for some pretty important people.

My standards on yachts are extremely high,

and I just expect everyone
to match me, if not better me.

Cool. Get this galley sorted, I think.

[sighs] Jiminy.

Sailing's, like, my passion,
but I've never worked on a motorboat.

-Yeah?
-Like, I used to work in law.

I was like, "You know what? [bleep] this."

And I moved to Greece,
and I became a sailor.

Growing up, we didn't have a lot of money.

Moving to Greece, I did it on a whim.

And my whole family was, like,

"She has a full scholarship
to law school.

Like, how stupid is that."

But I just get the gut feeling,

and I just go with that choice,

because my gut is my best friend.

-What's going on, guys?
-[Brian] Hey, what's happening, man?

-[Abbi] Hi.
-I'm Brian.

-Tanner. Nice to meet you, brother.
-Nice to meet you.

-Abbi.
-[Brian] Where you from?

-New York, originally, live in Lauderdale.
-Oh, the Big Apple.

-Nice one.
-Represent.

-You're a Mets fan. I don't like it.
-I'm not a Mets fan. I'm from Boston.

[Tanner] That's even worse.

What's up? I'm happy to see you.

-I'm happy to see you, too.
-Awesome.

You've been on here before, haven't you?

Twice. Are you excited?

Getting more into focus mode right now.

-It's a big job.
-A lot of responsibility.

Those extra stripes
are heavy, aren't they?

[laughs]

-All right, shout if you need me.
-[Kate] New season, who dis?

Hi, I'm Kate.

-Courtney, nice to meet you.
-Nice to meet you.

My God, I'm so sweaty.
Simone. Hi.

-Nice to meet you.
-Nice to meet you, too.

-How you doing? Kev.
-Kev, Ashton.

-Ashton, nice to meet you.
-Nice to meet you.

Courtney, um, tell me about
your yacht experience.

I've only done one season.

What's your favorite part
of the stewardess job?

I like meeting the guests.

Mm-hmm.

Service makes me
a little uncomfortable sometimes.

-Why?
-I'm not used to, like, servitude.

Yeah?

Growing up as an only child,

I'm obviously my parents' favorite.

I was like their little buddy.

We did a lot of traveling,
going out to nice dinners.

So I'm more accustomed

to sitting at the table
than I am serving it.

-And your least favorite part?
-The ironing.

I went to business school,
where I learned absolutely nothing.

I think I actually, like, lost brain cells

and money in my bank.

Now I have to pay off my student loans.

And how about you, Simone?

Um, I've been doing it
for maybe two years.

I mostly helped with, like, housekeeping,

and, like, laundry,
and then, like, service area.

I needed a lot of, like, guidance
in terms of that.

[Kate] Okay, well, this charter program
is super hectic.

I just want you guys to know
going into this season

how much work to expect,

so that you mentally prepare yourself.

In my experience, sometimes, stewardesses

start to think
that I'm asking them to do things

because I'm picking on them.

You just jab, jab, jab,
"Hi, my name's Kate." Jab.

You need to check yourself.

This season,
I would love to have two stews

that I get along with,
and get the job done.

Is that too much to ask?

Okay, well, um, Simone,
you have more experience.

You're gonna be second stew.

-And then Courtney, third.
-Yeah.

If you guys wanna
change into your uniforms.

-Thank you.
-Thanks.

-[Simone] I'm still sweating.
-[Courtney] Me too.

So hot. To the clubhouse.

A lot of time will be spent here,
so, we're lucky to have a window.

-First chef.
-How's it going?

-Nice to meet you.
-Nice to meet ya.

-Simone.
-Simone, Kevin.

-Nice to meet you.
-Nice to meet you.

-Oh, man.
-[Simone] Gonna throw this top on.

Little skort.

In South Africa, do you get, like,
American TV or...

Yeah, definitely.

It's not like animals
running around everywhere.

-[Brian laughs]
-Hey, hey.

Hey, what's happening?

-Hey. Abbi.
-Tanner.

Brian, nice to meet you.

Awesome, guys, welcome.
I'll be your bosun.

Sweet Tits.

Cool, let's have a quick chat,
get familiar with each other,

and then we can get cracking.

Um, you all have some experience,
which is good.

Brian, with your experience
in the position

I'm gonna ask you to be my lead hand.

-Okay.
-Let's all try and make this

a pleasant experience for all of us.
Let's all try and get along.

Let's just all pull together
and have a good season.

-I'm game for that.
-It's really good.

-You guys happy with that?
-[Abbi] Yeah.

-Let's all go down together.
-[Abbi] All right.

Then we'll have a chat to Kate
and see where she's put everybody.

-Sounds good. Am I in your way?
-Yeah.

-Kate.
-How you doing? I'm Tanner.

-Hi, Tanner, I'm Kate.
-I'm Abbi.

-Nice to meet you, you're my roommate.
-Hi, I'm Brian.

-Hi, Brian.
-Nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you.

Everyone is hotter than the next.

Tanner's hot, Brian's hot,
the chef is hot.

Damn, okay.

-How you guys doing? Tanner.
-Simone.

-Brian, nice to meet you.
-Courtney, nice to meet you.

[Ashton] Right, get into your gear.

Our crew is so hot
that Ashton is, like, the least hot.

[Kate sighs]

All right, so this is our stew pantry.

Alcohol and mixers here.

-[Ashton] This is our Bosun's locker.
-[Tanner] Awesome.

Shammies, blades.

[Kate] Did you know
we're picking up guests

-in 24 hours?
-[Courtney] I know.

[Ashton] We are going to spend
quite a lot of time in here.

Just watch your head.

When I think about the type of bosun
that I wanna be,

it's just finding that balance
between somebody that's respected,

but also somebody that is approachable.

On the topic of inflatables,

we've got the slide and the climbing wall.

Last season, there were certain things
about Chandler

that didn't make things easy on anybody.

Nobody sat us down in the beginning
and said,

"Listen, this is what you need."

We're running around
like chickens without a head.

I think our bosun's dropping the ball.

[yells]

My goal is to communicate,
communicate, communicate.

Let's all be on the same page.

Brian, I'm gonna put you on the bow,

and then the two of you
work just backwards

to the starboard side. Get started.

-All right.
-Cool.

So upper stew pantry...

If you're doing dinner service,
try and make all the drinks downstairs.

This table gets very hot here, it's black.

How bad is my mascara running?

[gasps] Oh, my God. I'm sorry.

-[Kate] These beds are easy to make.
-[Simone] Yeah.

[Kate] Okay, so each of you take one
so I can gauge where y'all are at.

[Tanner] How old are you, Abbi?

-Twenty-four, how old are you?
-Twenty-six.

Did you go to college, or...

Yeah, finished up
with a business degree.

You can see how far that got me.

Yachting, 100% has been
the best job I've ever had.

I love being a deckhand.

I love where I'm at,
especially when I look down

and I'm barefoot
and in a T-shirt for a living.

I wish I didn't go to college
and just got right into it immediately.

I love this [bleep].

[clears throat]

The beds look really good, you guys.

Attention all crew, everyone in the salon
in five minutes

for a staff meeting.

[Ashton] Copy for deck.

[Kate] Copy for interior.

Welcome aboard Valor.

First thing I wanna do

is introduce the first officer, Teh,

and Darrien, your chief engineer.

I've got a couple of rules about behavior.

I don't wanna catch you
embarrassing yourself

or the boat.

If I have to go bail somebody
outta jail,

you will go straight to the airport.

Captain Lee is intimidating as [bleep].

I'm gonna put a huge emphasis
on safety this year.

Last year, we almost had
a catastrophic incident.

[Ashton] Push that line to me.

[bleep]

[bleep]

-[man] We've got man overboard.
-Man overboard.

What?

I can't stress radios enough.

He would have died last year
if somebody hadn't had a radio.

That's how critical they are.

We're all here for one reason.

Make some money,
show our guests a great time.

We got charter guests coming on tomorrow,
a lot to get done.

-Let's go to work.
-Cool.

Thanks, Captain.

[Ashton] All crew, all crew,
provisions on the dock.

[Kate] Everybody brace yourselves
for a provision apocalypse.

Thanks.

[grunts]

[whistles]

[Ashton] I can help you.

I'm stronger than I look, guys.
[laughing]

We're gonna run through these shirts
pretty quick.

Yeah.

Everyone's, like, sweating b*ll*ts.

The heat in Thailand
is like a silent k*ller.

You go outside for two minutes,

you're drenched in sweat

and you feel like
you're gonna pass out.

Oi, well done.

It's so [bleep] hot on this boat.

[Abbi] Do you want me
to feed it through...

-Uh, yeah, please.
-Yeah.

I'm, uh, kind of, like,
a psycho perfectionist with things.

Okay. My mom is like that.

Are you close with your parents?

My father's, unfortunately,
passed away a couple years ago.

-Oh, I'm sorry.
-But my mom,

yeah, we're pretty close now.

I was just down in South Africa now,
I've got a daughter down there.

-Oh, you do?
-Yeah, she's five years old,

-Five?
-Yeah.

My daughter's name is Micah.

She is the absolute love of my life.

Was it your girlfriend or...

Yeah, it was the first girl
I ever kissed, actually.

We were together for about three years.

And then, yeah, we had a kid together.

And then [bleep] went south.

Me and my daughter's mom,
we are separated at the moment.

But having my daughter
was a big reality check for me,

because I was 24.

I used to binge drink a lot.

I used to go three days straight
with no sleeping.

I definitely needed to change my ways.

You wanna just undo all the water.

I've been in this industry now
for three-and-a-half years

and I just want to be the best role model
for my daughter.

If I mess up on the jobs,
I'm going to let her down.

[Lee] Kevin, Ashton, Kate,

I need you three

in the crew mess in five.

-Copy that.
-Be right there.

All right, guys, charter number one.

We have Michael Castellano,
an entrepreneur

who's created companies
in various industries.

He's joined by some close friends,

and Samantha Ledwell,
his girlfriend of six years.

[Kate] Very cute couple.

Michael wants to have a private
surprise candlelit dinner on board

for just himself and Samantha

on the second day.

And he wants to have a live violinist.

This is something we can't [bleep] up.

This is an advanced-level
service evening.

Two dinners in one night,

and two stews
who don't like doing service?

-[Courtney] What setting are you using?
-You wanna use cotton.

Makes it even scarier.

Favorite cuisines.

Thai seems to top the list.

And they want an island excursion
on day two as well.

Okay, that's a wrap, guys.

-[Ashton] Thank you.
-[Lee] Let's get outta here.

[Courtney] I just really am
the worst at this.

They just re-wrinkle.

[gasps] I hate myself.

[Simone] Here, hang this, I'll iron that.

OMG, Courtney.

So, I've calculated that, like,


are people of color.

It was such a mission
to even get the first job

because they were looking for these
blonde, blue-eyed people.

So, I'm excited about learning
how to do service

and being, like, a well-rounded stew

because I worked hard
to fricking get here.

Do the front.

-You don't have to do the back.
-Mm-hmm.

[Ashton] Guys,
I think that's enough for now.

Tomorrow morning, seven o'clock,
all of us on deck.

See you guys at 8:00.

Uh, it's wrinkled again.

-Good night, girls.
-Good night.

[Kevin] Hey, I've a question.

-Yeah?
-Have you got a label-maker at all?

-What are you labeling?
-Because I've got, like,

-a hundred of these, right?
-Yeah.

And this is to organize,
like, all the spices and things.

Some things are in, like, small jars.

Um, I love the concept,
and I love the label-maker.

However, that's, like,
a secondary priority,

because you've gotta get...
There's so much to do.

Yeah, I know, but I just, like,

if I'm looking for a spice
for [bleep] three minutes...

It's in a jar with a label, right?

-Yeah, I know.
-And you can smell it.

I'm pretty easygoing,
and I know not to upset a chef.

But we have guests
coming on board tomorrow.

Why are you looking for a label-maker?

Don't you have bigger things
to worry about?

I have a label for you. OCD.

Good night.

[Kevin] [bleep]

[yawns]

Let's [bleep] do this.

-Good morning. Hello.
-Hi.

Okay, so for wine they like Pinot Grigio,
Sauvignon Blanc, champagne.

-How confident are you at making drinks?
-Hmm. No.

A couple of them
are, like, old-fashioneds.

-Can you make those? You do.
-[Courtney] Yeah.

Like a piece of orange and a maraschino,
simple syrup, bitters, and rye whiskey.

Great, so if they order old-fashioneds,
it's you.

The only reason
that I know what drinks are

is because I like drinking.

I would be drinking champagne on a yacht.

I would be drinking rose on a yacht.

I would be drinking a mimosa.

Maybe like a spicy margarita.

The sky's the limit on a yacht.

Go to all the cabins
and make sure all the towels are out.

And you,
take all the crew white epaulettes,

bring them up here and iron them.

-Okay, I'll do that.
-Cool, thanks.

Tanner and Abbi on windows,

and then, uh, just do a walk-around,

and anything that's obvious,
that stands out.

-[Abbi] All right.
-[Tanner] Yeah.

I'm creasing the shirt.

[squidgy squeaks]

Looking good,
the captain's windows are clean.

We should put the shampoo

-in the showers for them.
-[Courtney] Okay.

I'm done here.

Let's take this out.

Get the whole bridle out.

Place the line on top of the bridle.

Okey-dokey.

Looking great.

[Lee] Moving right along.

-[Kevin] Kate?
-Yeah?

[Kevin] Today, I'm just gonna do
vegetable tacos.

-Oh, that's amazing.
-[Kevin] Yeah.

Poached chicken, so that can just go
on a platter, family-style, yeah?

I think it'd be better
if we plated it for them.

It's not gonna look nice,

'cause it's that family-style
of the lunch, you know?

Family-style is a gimmick.

It's like, "Look at all the food I made.
Oh, it's a feast."

So, the chef doesn't have to
think about plate composition,

and I have to carry out more dishes
and wash more dishes.

Do you know your vision?

I'm just trying to get
all the provisions put away.

[Lee] Attention all crew,
attention all crew,

15 minutes, so wrap it up.

[Ashton] Deck crew, let's get into
our whites, please. Copy.

-[Kate] Go change into your whites.
-[Simone] Yeah.

[bleep]! I'm sweating so much.

Yeah, my belt's way too big.

Courtney, will you please fill up

-those two ice buckets?
-Okay.

And also I need the stew pantry
as clear as possible.

Okay.

Just put your hand there.

[bleep]

We've got it.

[Ashton] You guys excited?
First charter. Let's do it.

Get into position. Here they come.

[Michael] It feels a lot cooler
than Bangkok.

It feels hotter to me.

-[Michael] I see champagne.
-[Samantha] Yes. You go first.

Okay, here we go.

-This is gonna be awesome.
-How you doing?

-Hi, Michael.
-Welcome aboard Valor.

-I'm Captain Lee.
-Nice to meet you, Captain Lee.

-Welcome aboard. My name is Kate.
-Oh.

Hi, Samantha, nice to meet you.

-Courtney, nice to meet you.
-Nice to meet you, Courtney.

Pleasure to meet you, Kevin.

Welcome aboard Valor.

Kate's gonna take you
on a tour of the boat.

We'll get your luggage on board
and get the party started,

if it's all right with you.

-Sounds good.
-We're gonna go right this way.

So this is the main salon.

-[Michael] Oh, good, there's AC in here.
-[man] Oh, yeah.

[Kate] Interior dining table,
but I don't think you'll have to use it.

[Michael] This is awesome.

And we're gonna go first
to the master stateroom.

-[Michael] Okay.
-[Ashton] Those need to come aboard.

Let's make a bit of a train here.

[Abby] Okay.

-[Kate] This is your master stateroom.
-[Samantha] Pretty.

-[Michael] All right.
-It's really nice,

because it has a full beam,

-window-to-window space.
-Wow.

[Kate] And also you've got
this bathroom in here.

-[Michael] Ooh, nice.
-I do have to show you

how to operate the toilet
a little bit.

Look at that, it's like a robot.

-[Kate] I think it technically is.
-Robo-toilet.

-Thanks.
-[man] Last one. That's it.

[Kate] Sky lounge,
great for after-dinner drinks.

-I love this room.
-Or before-dinner drinks.

All right, first one of the season.

[Kate] Probably, the most fun deck,

-it's got the Jacuzzi.
-Hot tub.

And then up here
there's a large bunny pad.

Great views, especially,
when we're underway,

which we're about to do momentarily.

-Abbi, you're gonna be on the bow with me.
-Okay.

When we get there,
I'll show you what to do.

Brian and Tanner, you're on the stern.

Brian, you're gonna cue captain
distances to the bow to stern.

Stay cool, stay focused, okay?

Yeah, let's do it.

[Ashton] This is a new crew,
it's a new boat.

I know Captain Lee's got his eye on me,
so I don't wanna mess up.

And just so you know,
that ain't [bleep] six inches.

-[laughs]
-All right.

[Kate] Now, we're just gonna go down here
to the guest quarters.

You guys can make yourself comfortable.

We'll drop the anchor
and have lunch around 1:30,

-if that's okay.
-Okay, sounds good.

-All right.
-Wait, do we have cool toilets?

[Kate] No, you don't have a smart toilet.

[Lee] Everybody ready?

Oh, yeah!

-[Ashton] You ready, Tanner?
-[Tanner] Yep.

[Ashton] Copy, ready on the off.

-Undo it as quick as you can.
-[Abbi] Okay.

Some vegetable tacos
outside for you guys.

[woman] Yes, thank you.

It's like Jurassic Park, right?

[Lee] We're coming outta here

-bow to stern.
-[Ashton] Hear that, copy.

Start undoing your line there, Abbi.

Pull in, pull in, pull in.
Quickly, quickly, quickly.

[Lee] Pick it up, Ashton.

[Ashton] All lines on deck on the bow.

All lines on deck, Cap.
All lines on deck.

All right, Cap,
we're opening up on the bow.

We've got 25 feet from Lady E,
nine feet from the dock.

And we're off! Bon voyage.

[Ashton] We're all clear on the off,
all clear.

[man] They're pretty good.

-[Samantha] This almost tastes like bacon.
-[man laughs]

It does.

Okay, let's get outta here.

-[Kate] Do you know where we're going?
-[Lee] Ko Rang Yai.

[Kate] I hear Ko Rang Yai
is beautiful this time of year.

I'm sure it is.

I think everything's here.

[Ashton] All deck crew, let's go down
and get dressed into your blue polo.

[Brian] Copy that.

Oh, my God, my shirt's a mess.

-[Kevin] Hey, Kate?
-Yeah?

Have you guys got platters for lunch yet?

Just tell me which ones you need.

Two bowls for the salad...

-Yeah.
-And one kind of large plate.

-Three platters, two bowls.
-Yeah.

This first lunch, I need
to put out a really good effort.

At the end of the day,
it doesn't matter how Cap gets

the [bleep] boat
off the side of the dock.

It's all down to the food,
and everything needs to be perfect.

They're aware about lunchtime and stuff?

Um, I'm just using 1:30,

but I said when we dropped the anchor.

Okay, cool.

[Tanner] Nice little sloppy Joe.

I made them extra sloppy for youse.
[laughter]

[Ashton] Good job on the release
from the dock.

Everything went smoothly.

Probably gonna have myself and Abbi
on lates,

-and the two of you guys on earlies.
-What's up, roomie?

Yeah.

Can I get anyone anything?

-I'll take another mojito.
-Yeah.

-Two, please.
-Make that three.

-Okay.
-[woman] Thank you, Courtney.

[Courtney] Where is the mint?

The mint's right here,
in this cooler here.

[Courtney] That one?

Courtney is very good at service,

and Simone is doing great
in the laundry room.

But also,
they're just nice and respectful.

This is so refreshing.

[man] Thank you very much.

[Kate] So pretty.

-[Lee] Mile seven out.
-[Ashton] Copy that.

[Kate] There's some guests out.

Go ask them, can I get you a water
or a drink or anything.

We'll be dropping the anchor soon,
and then lunch will be right after that.

Okie-dokie.

[Kate] Kevin, I'm going down to change.

Would you like
anything else to drink, maybe...

Uh, how much longer till lunch?

I think maybe half an hour.
I'll check with the chef and let you know.

Okay, thank you. No rush.

I'm so hungry.

They were just asking, like,

what time were you planning
on serving lunch.

No, they're just checking.

As soon as they're ready for it.

I was just waiting for Kate's call.

I'm ready to serve.

That's why I'm doing other stuff.

Okay, that's fine. Like, don't worry.
They're super chill.

So just let them know,
any time they want it.

[Courtney] Well, Kate's changing,
so don't say that.

I'll wait for Kate to change
and come back.

I would love, like, a charcuterie board.

[Michael] Got it.

-[Michael] Hello.
-[Courtney] How are you?

How much longer is lunch gonna be?

If it was gonna be a long time,

I was just gonna ask for,
like, a cheese plate.

[Courtney] We'll get you some food.

-Thank you.
-You're welcome.

See, this is what I'm talking, like,
it's all chilled, it's fine,

and then it's boom.

This is the first lunch.

Let's... Let's find Kate.

I'm embarrassed.
Where the [bleep] is Kate?

[Samantha] I haven't eaten all day.

Um, Kate?

[Kevin] Have we found Kate?

Is this Kate's room?

Courtney.

Hello?

[bleep]

[Courtney on radio] Kate, Kate, Courtney.

Have we found Kate?

I think Simone's trying.
I called her, but...

[Kevin] Oh.

What?

Guests say that they want lunch ASAP,

so, can I just go ahead
and tell the chef to serve quick?

[Kate] Tell him as soon as possible.

Okay, cool. Thanks.

I am just trying to change quickly.

I feel like a mom
trying to have two minutes

to go to the bathroom,
and the kids are like, "Mommy,

Mommy, are you in there?
Can I come and sit with you?"

No, I will be out in a second.
Go play with your brother.

Oh. [bleep]!

-Sure is pretty here, huh?
-[man] It is really pretty.

[Lee] Ashton, get ready to drop the hook.

[Ashton] How many sh*ts would you like?

Gimme two sh*ts and drop.

[anchor chain whirring]

Felt like a stick to me.

Nice work, Ashton.

-Wait, can I switch?
-No.

[laughing]

[Kate] Okay, how close are we?

[Kevin] Two minutes.

Each of you take one side of the table.
Carrot seed salad?

-Okay.
-And then put some on their plate.

So, we're gonna take the salads
and let the girls serve that.

Okay, cool.

[Simone] Which side are you starting on?

[Courtney] You start on the right.
That's left. [laughs]

Oh, wait, but they don't have plates.
[laughing]

There's no plates.

[Kate] Did you notice that
before you went to offer?

Yeah, yeah, we noticed it
before we went to offer.

Good. Okay, the plates are in there.

Plates on the table, Jesus.

That's 101,
and they haven't even got that.

They haven't even got a one.

-Just go, we'll put food on it real fast.
-Thank you. Cool.

There are no plates on the table

because usually, chefs plate meals.

But we're doing family-style.

Would you like some carrot seed salad?

Yeah, I'd love some.

[Kevin] So, char-grilled almonds, tahini.

Yogurt down the bottom.

-And then this is poached chicken breast.
-Okay, great.

-[Michael] Shall we start?
-[man] Cheers.

-Okay, here we go.
-I think there's more coming.

You guys can put them on the table
or on the sidebar when you're done.

Um, but let's go out with other items.

-We'll bring those later.
-[Simone] Okay.

Are we leaving the stuff out there?

They accidentally
brought the carrots back,

uh, so, that's how far we've gotten.

That's all right.
It's their first service, you know?

Let's be positive, not negative.

I'm positive,
I'm just relaying the facts, buddy.

Still happening.

With Kate, it's very important for us
to be in sync.

[Kate] Would you like some pear parmesan
and rocket salad?

-Yes, please.
-Okay.

But I'm not gonna let it screw me up,
if it's not perfect, this first charter.

Mmm. The fish is very flavorful.

[Michael] Delicious.
The fish is really good.

-[Samantha] And the chicken.
-[Michael] Excellent.

-Okay, great.
-[Michael] Compliments to the chef.

-It's the best lunch I've had today.
-[laughter]

-[Ashton] This is the trampoline.
-[Tanner] Okay.

Let's give them this and the kayaks

to kind of chill on and play on,
if they want.

-[Tanner] Okay.
-From there we'll focus on the slide.

[man] We have to wait about an hour
before we can go in the water?

[woman] Your mom's not here,
so, I think it's okay.

[laughter]

[grunts] So heavy.

[Ashton] Tanner, I need help
with this kayak, please.

[Tanner] On my way up.

-[Ashton] Hustle, hustle.
-Thanks.

[Abbi] Holy [bleep].

I have about a year's experience
on sailboats,

so I'm comfortable handling lines,
driving the tender.

[Abbi grunts] [bleep]

But I'm not used to the whole
rush, rush, rush, rush.

It's just wild.

Sweet.

All right, who's first up?

Awesome!

Great, guys.

I can't wait to dive in the water.

-Ooh!
-Oh!

[all laughing]

[woman] Oh, my God, that's so crazy.

[Ashton] Have fun, guys.

Now I see kayaks
and the charter guests swimming.

They love water sports. I love them.

[woman] So cool.

Oh, wow, this is so pretty.

[Kevin] Today I was gonna do Thai-style,
so I've got Tom Yum to start.

And then pork belly.

Tonight we're gonna do
a Thai-inspired dinner.

I worked in a Thai restaurant
when I was younger.

Thailand here has got a lot of fresh
and, like, salty, spicy ingredients.

It's outrageously good. They'll love it.

-Oh, [bleep].
-Go ahead.

-That's good.
-Cool, man, cool.

Was it so pretty?

[Ashton] Good timing, good timing.

-Here you go.
-Thank you so much.

[Ashton] Deck crew,
change into your blacks, please.

[Tanner] Kate, looking lovely as always.

Thanks, Tanner.

-Yeah. And I don't? Wow.
-[Abbi] Yeah.

It's my little black dress.
I take it everywhere.

[Tanner] Oh, all right.
Tanner, you look so handsome. Thanks.

[Abbi laughs]

Deck crew, deck crew, let's get
all the toys in, please, guys.

[Brian] Okay, copy.

[Abbi] I'm so hot.

Maybe some food and water will help us.

[Tanner] Jiminy Cricket, I'm starving.

[Brian] I know, me too. I'm hungry.

[grunts]

-[Kevin] Tonight, Kate, 8:30?
-[Kate] Yeah, I think it'll be 8:30.

-What is that?
-[Kevin] Wagyu.

[Courtney] Mm.

I'll give you half my tip
if you drink that.

-Ew.
-[Kevin laughs]

How are we doing?

Uh, we've got all the canoes up.

We're busy with the trampoline now,

-and I'm sweating my balls off.
-[Tanner] I'm so hot.

[Ashton] Has everybody eaten?

No? Nobody's eaten?

Okay, um...

[bleep]! Abbi, go have dinner.

-[Abbi] All right.
-Okay.

[Ashton] Damn it, man.

I feel terrible
about not giving my crew a break.

Being in a leadership role,
you need to manage

when they're eating,
sleeping, changing, everything.

And already, this is somewhere
that I've slipped up.

It's not okay.

[bleep]

-You ready, baby?
-Mm-hmm.

-Is it still hot out here?
-Yeah.

[laughs]

Nice.

Can I get you another drink?

-I'll have a glass of champagne.
-Okay.

-Why don't you go to the master
and start doing turn-downs now?

-I might call you to help us with dinner.
-[Simone] Perfect.

Thank you.

Bam.

[Ashton] All right, Brian,
thank you, dude.

-A pleasure, brother
-You and Tanner, please go down.

Be on deck at 7:00.

And please, like, if you guys
haven't had dinner yet,

just let me know.

I know there's a lot going on,

but I need you guys to stay happy
and motivated as well.

Coming into my first bosun gig,

I couldn't ask for
a better crew right now.

If I had to come into it
with a green crew,

I'd flipping throw myself off the boat.

Thank you so much for today.

-Great working with you guys.
-Today was a good day.

[Brian] Rock star.

-[Kevin] Kate, two minutes.
-Simone, Kate.

Can you please come to the galley
for service?

[Simone] Copy.

[Kevin] All right, let's go,
or these are gonna get cold.

[Simone] Let me just call Kate.

[Kevin] That doesn't... They've gotta go.

-If I've poured...
-[Simone] Okay. Okay.

I'm coming. Right here.

-Tom Yum to start. Yeah.
-Right, okay.

This is Tom Yum soup, so enjoy.

It's incredible.
It's absolutely incredible.

[Michael] Yeah, this is really good.

-[Kevin] Is that clear, is it?
-[Kate] Yeah.

[Brian] I'm gonna have a shower, bru.

What is that, an invitation,
or are you just letting me know?

No, that means I'm going first.

[Tanner laughs]

You know what is strange, though, guys,

is we've got seven guests out there,

and I've only got one main plate.

-Can I get six more, please?
-[Kate] Cool.

-[Kevin] Such a [bleep] afterthought.
-Get off my ass, Kevin.

Sorry, Kate, it's the last place
I'd like to be.

[Kate] I think that
we're gonna have some issues

with Kevin and service.

He's very particular.

He's gonna lose it real soon.

All right, cool.

-Are you ready?
-Yeah, pork belly with Thai yellow curry.

This is beautiful, I love it so much.

Okay.

-[Kevin] Evening, guys.
-Good evening, Chef.

All right, so the main course,
pork belly.

This is a sweet Thai yellow curry

with toasted rice and toasted peanuts.

-Enjoy.
-Delicious.

-Thank you.
-[woman] Thank you.

[man] Oh, that's good.

[woman] It's so good.

Kevin is a keeper.

[Samantha] Wait, we didn't say grace.

I'd like to thank Kevin for this meal.

-[laughs]
-[man] Good old Kev.

-[woman] Excellent.
-[Kate] All yacht chefs are crazy,

and if they're not any kind of crazy,
their food will bad.

Tonight, he proved he can cook very well.

So what do you guys think of the stews?

-Simone's cool.
-[Brian] Simone's cool, yeah.

-Courtney's so quiet.
-Yeah.

[Ashton] I think Courtney's
a little bit shy, maybe.

I think give her a couple drinks,
she's gonna be laughing.

[Tanner] I wanna hook up with Kate.

I just think she's sexy as [bleep].

Kate has caught my eye, 100%.

She's beautiful, smart, funny,

and I tend to lean towards older women.

Get some liquid courage out

-and see what happens.
-Yeah.

The oldest woman
I've ever been with is 58.

I was playing darts,
one thing led to another.

Next thing you know,

she was driving me to work
the next morning.

-[Ashton] Hey, Courts.
-[Brian] Hey, Courtney.

[laughs]

[Courtney] That's so funny
I'm gonna tell her.

[bleep]

[Michael] There you are.

[woman] Does Samantha wanna say hi
to Teddy?

Hi, Teddy.

Hey, baby.

I love you.

[Samantha laughs]

So cute.

He's our fur baby. [laughs]

I think Michael and Samantha
are just a beautiful couple,

and the perfect example

of a guy that has a lot of money
and a very hot girl.

[Michael] Bye, Teddy.

He 100% knows what's going on.

-He's like, huh? Huh?
-Oh, he just play doggy spy. It's fun.

[Kate] You can knock off. It's 9:35.

-Be on deck at 6:30.
-Okay, cool.

You guys going to bed?

I think we're gonna
turn in for the night.

Yeah.

-I'm all done with these, so...
-Oh, sure.

-Do you want a fresh one
-I'm gonna head... Nope.

[Kate] Do you have a second
to talk with Kevin about tomorrow night?

-Sure. Hey, Kevin.
-How are you?

Good, good. I just wanna know
what's going on tomorrow night.

I've heard something maybe special
in the cards.

So, I'm going to be proposing to Samantha.

-Oh.
-Yes.

Right.

We'll have dinner,
we'll finish up dinner,

and then at the end of dinner, I'm...

-Okay.
-I'm gonna ask her

-a very important question.
-Yeah.

So tomorrow night,
uh, obviously, filet mignon,

-and then massive lobsters as well.
-Awesome.

-A little nervous.
-It's gonna be amazing.

-Thank you, Kate, appreciate it.
-My pleasure.

[grunts]

[sighs] [bleep]

[grunts]

I'm getting some cramps. I...

Day one... day one.

[Kevin] Just stomach cramps.

They've been happening
over the last few hours.

[Kate] You were all over the place.
What's going on?

[Kevin] Just really tight, you know?

I'm gonna go to bed.

Good night, guys.

-[Kate] Going to bed?
-Yeah, we're outta here.

-Good night.
-Good night. Have a good sleep.

-All right, night, Simone.
-Good night.

-Good night. Bye.
-See you in the morning.

[Ashton] Be on deck at 9:30.

-All right.
-Okay. Good job today.

-Thanks.
-Thank you so much.

Yeah, thank you. I learned a lot.

Tanner wants to bang you.

What?

Tanner wants to bang you.

[Kate] That's super flattering.

-Also super kinda creepy.
-I know.

I think Tanner is
the cutest thing ever.

If I was in my twenties.

-[Tanner] Good night, Kate.
-Good night.

[flatulence]

[Ashton] [bleep] me.

We're the only ones out here.

I know, I wonder where everybody is.

[toilet flushing]

[bleep]

What have you done in there, bro?

All good, man.

The stomach thing today is just...

Jesus, it's got me.

I'm just having massive cramps,

but I've just gotta push through it.

-They're gonna come up now.
-Okay.

Okay.

Go to the master,
and start making it real quick.

Oh!

-So you guys about ready to start brunch?
-[man] Perfect.

-[Kevin] All dishes are ready to go.
-[Kate] Okay.

[Kevin] Thanks, guys.

[moans]

-Sausage roll?
-Sure.

-Would you like some salmon and avocado?
-Yes, please.

This one will still have to go.

Okay, so we can just leave it.

[woman] Oh, my gosh, this is amazing.

[man] Massive breakfast.

Thank you, Chef Kevin.

[Kevin grunts]

[Kevin over radio] Kate, Kate, Kevin.

[bleep] come on.

Sorry, mate.
I've just gotta go to the toilet.

Yeah, I'm making coffee now so...

Jesus, the stomach thing today.

These couple are gonna remember this night
for the rest of their lives.

I've got a lot of work to do tonight.

I'm a bit worried whether I'm gonna
get this all done or not.

Come on.

[Kevin] Oh, Jesus.

[woman] That's nice.

So 11:15 for the guests
to disembark to the beach?

-[Kate] Yep.
-Thanks, Kate.

I'm gonna probably send Simone to laundry.

We're gonna send you to the beach.

Uh, you're gonna kinda be
the cocktail waitress,

because they can buy drinks at the bar.

I would rather be anywhere on Earth,

including the middle of a garbage dump,

than be at the beach.

It's 90,000 degrees.

[Kevin grunts]

Jesus.

Do you see those two umbrellas?

-Yeah.
-That's where you're going.

Courtney's gonna be with you as well.

Ready for our beach date?

-[Tanner] Let's go do it.
-[Ashton] Cool.

[Tanner] All right, guys.

Courtney.

Hello, friends. Have fun at the beach.

-Bye, guys.
-Thank you.

-Bye, guys.
-You're welcome.

-[woman] Have a mojito for me.
-[all laugh]

[man] This thing's got power, huh?

Yeah.

[Courtney] I'm the drink girl.
What would you like?

[woman] I would love a coconut.

-And a mojito for you.
-[man] Coconut water.

-Do you wanna walk over there with her?
-Yeah, we can walk.

[grunts]

Hey, Kate, have we got

-any medicine on board?
-Yeah, what do you need?

My stomach's, like, just churning,
like, really bad.

-Let me go look.
-Thanks, man.

[indistinct chatter]

Do we have all the drinks?

This is the coconut water,

-and then the other one.
-We need one more...

There you go.
I was, like, what am I missing?

I feel like I'm walking 20 miles

through piles of hot garbage.

[Courtney groans]

If I get a tan from this polo,

I will not have a polo tan.

I wanna do anything
but what I'm doing right now.

I couldn't date a girl like Courtney.

I'm stepping only on shells.

I don't know if she's kidding or not,

but it seems like
she's high maintenance as [bleep].

-Thank you.
-You're very welcome.

[man] Thank you very much.

Captain, Kate. What's your 20?

[Lee] Bridge deck, starboard side.

If anyone's looking for me,
I'm sitting on the toilet.

Okie-dokes.

[Kevin] Ashton, are you in the toilet?

-[knocks on door]
-[door opens]

Uh, the chef asked me
if we had a medical kit.

Is he not feeling well?

[Kevin groans]

[toilet flushes]

-[Lee] Is it an antacid thing?
-Will it slow it down

-or speed it up?
-[Lee] I don't know.

[Kevin groans]

[flatulence]

[Kevin moans]

Jesus. Mr. Dobson!

[Kate] Kevin has got to cook
the biggest meal of this couple's life

and I'm pretty sure

he cannot do it
from the seat of his toilet.

-[Kevin groans]
-Something's gotten into Kevin.

And it wants out.

-[toilet flushing]
-[Kevin] Man down.

[Lee] Thailand is really unique.

It's just, like, sensory overload.

God, how beautiful is this?

Holy [bleep]!

-[elephant trumpets]
-This is awesome.

[man] Is there any way we can get
the entire crew in our shower,

-and we can [bleep] make it rain?
-[Ashton] What the [bleep]?

These guests are gone.

[cheering]

So the guests have a pretty big request.
They want you to strip.

[women squealing]

We're not...

getting on your nerves, are we?

[Lee] I hope this is the last time
I have this conversation about radios.

You should [bleep] sleep with it.

[Kevin] It's [bleep] breakfast.
It's not rocket science.

-[Simone] You're so rude.
-You haven't even seen rude.

You are rude. I don't care, you're rude,
I'm telling you now.

-You wanna tell me I'm being unfair?
-You know I work really, really hard.

I'm sorry I missed a couple of things,
but I'm not perfect.

[Kate] When you hook up
with somebody on a yacht,

you've gotta choose wisely.

[Courtney] Oh, my goodness.
Oh, my goodness.

[Courtney] I do feel like
he's, like, the type

that makes out with a new girl,
like, every week.

[Brian] I'm tired of working so hard

to get my [bleep] sucked.

[Abbi] Waking up next to your boss

is the most awkward thing.

It's just gonna be a really weird day.

[Kate] I think we have
the most attractive deck crew

-I've ever worked with.
-[laughter]

If it weren't unprofessional,

I would bang both of you.

[Ashton] There is this part of our crew

that is just not bonding
with the rest of us.

I'd like to go into the next two charters

a man down.

[bleep]

[Kevin] No, I don't think
you're a good chief stew.

[bleep] d*ck.

[both grunting]

We're beached. [bleep] me.

This is unnecessary drama, all of it.

You're not this special superstar
that you think you are.

[bleep] off.

sh*ts.

[Lee] If anybody thinks
that I won't fire somebody

in the middle of a [bleep] charter,
they don't know me.

Everybody feels
that way about you, Kate.

Okay, great. Go find another chief stew.

-I quit.
-Cool.

[Kate] Don't follow me.

Don't follow me.

[Lee] Wait for it, wait for it.

[ship horn blares]

[laughs]

[bleep]