07x09 - 12 Seconds in Heaven

[bunniefuu]

[woman] Previously on Below Deck...

-Ooh, where did they go?
-I don't know, you have to go find out.

Simone is a yachtie with no experience.

She literally did not speak
to one of them.

-They don't need any drinks or anything?
-No, they didn't say anything.

-[metal clangs]
-Oof! [bleep]

We're gonna have to get a doctor out here.

My knee is getting worse
and worse and worse.

[doctor]
I'll give you antibiotic injection.

Yeah, anything.

-Tanner's totally my type.
-No!

-Do you like him a little bit?
-A little bit?

-[Brian] Simone does really like you.
-That's dangerous.

-Once you commit to that, then that's...
-That's it.

-I have a new deckhand coming.
-Okay.

-It's Rhylee.
-[Rhylee] Surprise!

You have to be [bleep] kidding me.

[Rhylee] Can you order something paleo?

Dude, I'm not your chef, all right?
I'm the charter guests' chef.

How do you say [bleep] off in Thailand?
Tell me, "chef."

Talk to me about this bull [bleep].

[Tanner] He just talked about the problem.

Shut the [bleep] up.
Who the [bleep] are you?

You are the only person
that has come in new

-and there's [bleep] drama.
-Why?

Shut up, and then you can [bleep]
hear what I'm saying.

-[Ashton] You're a joke.
-Don't walk away, Ashton.

[bleep] off, Rhylee.
You belong on a fishing boat in Alaska.

Well, buy me a [bleep] ticket,
and I'll be back.

Oh, my God. [bleep]

-What is your problem?
-You are the problem.

-Explain it. You haven't explained it yet.
-I can't exp...

You need to self-reflect and understand

what upsets everybody else around you
when you get

to a [bleep] dinner table.

Shut up when someone tells me
that I'm ordering paleo

-and that's a problem for him.
-All the men in your life

that have been authority issues
in your life, you have a problem with.

You think you three [bleep]
are the only [bleep] men of authority?

I'm done with you, Rhylee.

-You [bleep] lasted two days.
-Two days, got it.

[Tanner] God, you're so lost.
I feel so sorry for you.

[bleep] you, Tanner.
Don't [bleep] stand up to me.

Who the [bleep] are you?

You're not anybody that's talking to me

when Ashton and I are talking,
you understand that?

-What the [bleep] are you talking about?
-Exactly what the [bleep] I just said.

That's so sad. That's so sad.

[Ashton] So, I'm sorry
you had to go through that.

Unfortunately, she's a new crew member,
and it is my department,

-and I'll deal with that.
-Yeah.

-[Kate] How's it going?
-She's a nightmare.

-You blame only Rhylee?
-Every crew dinner has been non-dramatic.

-Everyone's been having fun.
-Really? I don't feel the same way.

Kevin is always super intense,
loud-mouthed, overbearing.

Rhylee was finally like,
"You know what, shut your mouth."

It's kind of a relief to see Rhylee
fighting with Kevin.

I'm like, "Thank you, friend,
you handle him for a while."

Kevin acts like he's Gordon Ramsay.

But I think even Gordon Ramsay
is more pleasant to be around than Kevin.

Let's get out of here and go to the bar.

-[vocalizing]
-[laughs]

[Simone] Have you been to Thailand before?

-No, I've never.
-There's a lot of massage parlors.

-Cheers, cheers.
-[woman] Cheers.

You [bleep] limit. Look at you.

-I'm... I'm combative.
-I have your back.

I just think Kevin
has been obnoxious all night.

I see tiger, I see "raar."

[Rhylee]
This is really the last place I wanna be,

hanging out with a bunch
of [bleep] assholes.

[drunken shrieking]

Can I have another one of these, please?

Did I think that coming to Thailand
was gonna be a fresh start?

100%.
But there's obviously a bias on board.

[screaming] Are we all right?

The fact that this is how
it's going already is just... foreboding.

[Kevin] Let's get [bleep]!

[all cheering, exclaiming]

[Rhylee] This is my fave. I'll be back.

[woman] You've been in my face.
-[Rhylee] Are we dancing? What?

[Tanner] Oh, [bleep]. Dude.

-Where's Tanner?
-I don't know.

[retching and vomiting]

Jiminy Cricket.

[vomiting continues]

[girls cheering]

Holy [bleep].

This is where I usually clock out.

I love it! I [bleep] love it!

Do that, do that, do that.

No!

Yes!

Hi!

-I wanna hook up with you so bad.
-Do you?

-Wanna sit down and I'll hook up with you?
-Yeah, we can sit down.

Isn't he cute?

Finally! Like, "Damn, son,
you took your time."

I [bleep] love it!

-Hi! How's the dance floor?
-[Simone] I was looking for you.

Yeah, no doubt. No doubt.

Gross. Clearly, these two
are not afraid of PDA.

PDA to me, is like a handhold.
Or like a peck.

It should never go further.

[bleep] sorry.

Yeah, Tanner. Dirty little man.

My man, I love you.

-Let's go, let's go.
-[Tanner] Stop. Stop, stop, stop.

I wanna run in traffic!

[Ashton] Kevin, stop being so destructive.

[Kate] Whoo!

[Ashton] Kevin, get in, bru.

-[Simone chuckles]
-Nothing's easy.

I've never taken an Uber
this long in my life.

-[Courtney] Hi.
-Rhylee, honey.

-Kevin!
-[Rhylee] I have to pee. I have to pee.

Kev! [bleep]. Jiminy Cricket.

[Kevin] ♪ Can we do the can-can?
Can we... Can we do the ♪

[Tanner] Oh, the can-can.

Brian, Brian, Courtney.

-Hey, sweetheart. How was your night?
-Not good.

Rhylee and Kevin got into a fight
over appetizers. Over appetizers!

Kev, let's go, brother.

-[Tanner] Top or bottom?
-[Ashton] Bottom, bottom, bottom.

[Ashton] Jesus,
his legs are like concrete, bru.

[bleep] hell.

-I love you.
-[guys chuckle]

[Courtney laughing]

Rhylee.

I'm going to bed. Bye-bye.

[Simone] This is so confusing,
intellectually.

I'm like, "Ugh,
what am I getting myself into?"

But emotionally,
I can't fight the attraction.

[sighs]

-Let's go to bed.
-If you just wanna sleep, that's okay.

If it's more than that
then that's not okay. And I'm very stern.

-Oh, yeah, clearly.
-Bedtime. Bedtime stories. Ha!

-Ah! OMG.
-Jiminy Cricket.

I'm a little surprised
I'm waking up next to Simone.

I don't remember bringing her to bed,
but it was bound to happen.

You know, there was sexual tension there.
If I get to hook up with a hot chick

with a [bleep] phenomenal ass,
then I'm in.

Is the alcohol so strong in Thailand?
Do I still have a job?

-And how are you, Simone?
-I'm pretty well rested, thanks.

[both laugh]

Why do I detect a note
of hesitation there?

"I'm fine, g*dd*mn it!"

-Oh, [bleep]!
-[blowing raspberry]

[Tanner] Come in!

-What's up, Brian?
-What's up, bro?

-How you feeling, dude?
-I still can't walk on it.

I feel disappointed and frustrated,

because I thought by now
my leg would be okay

and I'd be able to work again.

bru, I need to [bleep] work,
I can't sit here anymore.

-I'm dying.
-It must be driving you mad.

At this point, the thought has got through
my head that I'm gonna lose my job.

But, I mean, that's not even the worst.

I'm literally getting to the point
where I might lose my leg.

[sighs] Oh, [bleep]

It's so nice not being
on the morning shift for a change.

[Courtney] That is nice.

-Good morning, Kate.
-Morning.

I love the out-of-the-bed look.

[Tanner] Yeah. There you go.

♪ I'm so sorry I argued about appetizers ♪

[Rhylee] I'm not oblivious to the fact

that fighting with Kevin
and Ashton last night

was not a good idea.

I am quick to anger.

100%, I think,
my temper comes from my father.

He walks out the door
with a firearm in hand

when the FedEx truck shows
up at Christmas,

because he wants to know what the [bleep]
you're doing on his property.

So I am who I am,

but, you know, I'm gonna try my best
not to rock the boat.

-We scrub with the grain, all right?
-Oh, you wanna go with the grain?

[Ashton] That's the way I've been taught.

Yeah, whatever way you wanna do it,
it's cool with me.

I was always told against,
but I'm down for with,

because with makes it so much easier.

-Tell me about your sleepover.
-[bleep] hell, dude, I don't know.

I woke up next to her,
and I was just like, "Oh..."

The only real thing I remember
is that argument

between Kev, Rhylee
and then you and Rhylee and stuff

-and I was like, "Holy[bleep]"
-Hey, Ash?

Okay, where would you like me?

Uh, dah, dah, dah...

[she coughs]

Well, this certainly
couldn't be any less awkward. [laughs]

Can you start preparing everything

-on the sundeck, please?
-Okay.

[bleep]

[groans] [bleep]

You know, we've been out
for four nights together as a crew...

Yeah, and that's never happened, you know?

We've always had a [bleep] great time
when we're out.

I don't wanna be [bleep] dealing
with drama and issues on our night off.

Yeah, it was so embarrassing.

If I'm 100% honest,
I don't personally like Rhylee.

-She's got a bad attitude.
-Oh, [bleep] you!

She really just [bleep] pisses me off.

You know, like...

[bleep] hell, dude,
with the grain is so much easier.

Rhylee, Rhylee, Ashton.
Will you meet me on main deck aft, please?

Copy that, on my way. [bleep]

I mean, any time somebody's
called down

after an incident like last night,
you know you're going to be reprimanded.

So, obviously, we had words last night,

which is unfortunate
that it happened already.

I don't really know what happened
with you and Kev, but...

my biggest thing was just,

the way you reacted
and the way you came across,

I was just like,
"[bleep], there's fiery Rhylee again."

That's why I reacted like I did.
So, like, I apologize for that.

There are going to be things
that we're not happy about,

but moving forward, let's deal with them
in the appropriate way.

I don't like the way
she handled herself last season,

and history has proven to repeat itself.

But I've got a crew to think about.
We're all here to make money,

and I need to make this work
for all of us.

I don't entirely understand
why it went down last night.

And I am sorry for causing it.

I wanna make this work for you and for us.
I've got no hard feelings.

-I think we can do it.
-Yeah. Thank you.

-I was gonna push you overboard.
-[both laugh]

[Courtney] I cannot iron for [bleep].

[Lee] Kate, Ashton, and Kevin,
meet me in the crew mess

-for the preference sheet meeting.
-[Ashton] Copy, Cap.

-What's up, guys?
-Hey, Cap.

Hump charter.

-Ooh!
-[laughter]

[Lee] Okay.

Charter five's gonna be
a shortened charter.

-And we have a half a dozen ladies.
-Six?

So it's gonna be Lynn Schuster
and her fabulous friends.

They're all moms, and can't wait
for a much-needed girls' trip.

It's gonna be their first
international trip together.

[Kate] Wait a minute...
I recognize Wendy from last season.

[Lee] Yeah, Wendy was a guest
of Steve's last charter season.

Mr. Foam Man.

[Steve] Wendy,
we were supposed to go jacuzzing.

Come on, girls!
It's hot! It's hot as [bleep].

[Wendy] I've gotta hide in the galley
or something.

[Kate] From what I remember,
Wendy is relaxed and chill,

and that's exactly the kind of charter
I need right now.

Foodies, and their favorite cuisines,
Kevin, are Asian and Italian.

So she wants an entire dinner
to be authentic Italian cuisine.

-[Kate] This white-themed dinner party...
-Lunch on the beach.

I think they're gonna be a good time,
polite...

I think they will.

I don't really see any dicks
in this group.

[group chuckles]

I would concur with that, Kate.

We need to do this side,
port side, and then the tender.

Mm.

[squeegee squeaking]

[Kevin] Rhylee, Rhylee, Kev.
Can I just see you on main deck aft?

[Ashton] What's your take on the whole Kev
and Rhylee situation?

They're both wrong. I blame Kevin more.

He's a higher rank.

That's not the way you welcome
a new crew member.

Hey, Kevin.

Um... I'm upset
about how last night went down,

because it got too heated,
and I didn't wanna back down.

You know, and we just went... [poof]
and I'm really sorry for that.

-I appreciate you apologizing.
-Yeah.

-I didn't expect that.
-And no... But, yeah, I'm sorry.

I'm a bad [bleep] drinker sometimes,
you know?

But you can't have any bad blood.

I didn't want it to get heated like that.

-Yeah, you're a little spitfire too.
-I should have red hair too.

I do like to kind of push people
a little bit.

And see how quickly they bounce back.
Rhylee bounced back tenfold.

Well, I don't hold any grudges,

-and I hope you don't either, and so...
-Yeah, no, me either.

-Thank you. I appreciate that.
-Okay. No problem.

[Brian] Hi, sweetheart.
How are you feeling?

I'm okay.

-What's up, Kate?
-Not much.

-How you doing, love?
-Just working.

Sleepover tonight?

[Kate] That's about it. Looks good, guys.

-[Courtney] Damn it.
-[Brian] Sorry.

[Rhylee] All right, you guys, good night.
I'll see you in the morning.

-[Courtney] [bleep] [chuckles]
-Very, very sorry.

-[Tanner] Hi.
-[Simone] Hello.

-Are you all cozy in my bed?
-Mm-hm.

[Simone moaning loudly]

Ah! Woke up this morning in Tanner's bed.
I feel very happy, and, like, warm inside.

OMG.

Check in the bosun's locker
for the other hose,

and then we can start rinsing
and washing, yeah.

-Good morning.
-Good morning.

They gotta make anti-wrinkle fabric,
because I can't live like this.

All right, so today's pick up day.

Take all the covers off,
check all the windows.

-I think that's it.
-We're down Brian again?

-I think so.
-Yeah.

Let's get things going.
Let's get on top of it.

-Have a good day.
-[Rhylee] And, break!

-Break!
-[Rhylee] Okay.

[knocking]

-[Brian] Come in!
-[Lee] How you doing, Bri?

-Hey, Cap.
-How's the leg?

The swelling's going down,
but it's still not right.

I'm stressing out.

How about if I ship your ass off
to the hospital,

get you some IV antibiotic?
You feel all right with that?

It's been three days, and we should see
significant progress, and we're not.

The reality of it is
if he can't do his job,

I have to have somebody that can.

I'll make arrangements for it, okay?

All right, Captain. Thank you so much.
Cheers.

All right? Okay, buddy.

-[Rhylee] Morning, Simone.
-Morning.

-I was just curious how last night went?
-He's just nice to cuddle with.

So you're not, like,
hoping for more than canoodling?

[Ashton] Rhylee's like, "What do you mean,

you've cuddled two nights
and you haven't banged?"

[laughter]

-[Simone] Oh, okay.
-That's what she's actually asking.

Oh... oh, no, I like to take my time.

Mm-hmm.

[Kate] All crew, all crew,
provisions are arriving.

-[Courtney] Copy.
-[Ashton] Copy.

Thank you. Thank you.

[she sneezes loudly]

-Bless you!
-Thank you.

[Lee] Ashton, Ashton, Lee,
the car's here for Brian,

so if you can get him up here,

-we'll get him out.
-Let's get you outta here.

A lot of emotions going through my head
at the moment.

First of all, I don't wanna lose my job.

-Second of all, it could be serious.
-[Courtney] Bye.

I feel so bad for Brian.
I really hope it's not anything permanent.

[exhales sharply]

I am very worried and really scared.

I don't know, I'm in Thailand. Who knows
what could happen at the hospital.

[vehicle back-up alarm beeping]

I'm gonna put Rhylee on lates.
Tan, you're on earlies.

I'll wake up earlier, obviously,
to help out with the morning stuff,

-and I might stay up later to help you.
-[Rhylee] Okay.

[Kate] Simone, I'm gonna have you
on lates this charter.

I'm gonna be earlies,
and Courtney's gonna be middle.

We're one man down, but we've been
one man down for the last four charters.

All right, we can go down
and get into our epaulets.

-[Kate] Okie-doke.
-[Tanner] Yi-yii.

[bleep]. We need a bigger room.

-Radio check, radio check.
-Loud and clear.

[Tanner] Thanks, Ash.

-I just started bleeding so...
-[Kate] Oh, great!

[Lee] Attention all crew,
attention all crew.

I need everybody on the aft deck,
guests are approaching.

[laughter]

-Oh, my gosh, it's so hot.
-I'm like dying.

-Sweaty bottom.
-That's such a great visual.

[Ashton] Ready, bro, ready.

-[sighs] This is amazing.
-Oh, my gosh, I'm so excited!

Usually at this moment, I have like
a horrible feeling. But I feel great.

It scares me a little.

-[Kate] Hi!
-Hi! I'm Lynn.

-[Lynn] Nice to meet you.
-Oh, my God. I'm sweating.

-Simone.
-[Lynn] Simone, nice to meet you.

-Courtney, nice to meet you.
-Nice to meet you.

-Ashton. How are you, my dead. Sweetheart.
-I'm doing well, thank you.

-I'm Tanner.
-Hi. Oh, you're easy on the eyes.

-Thank you so much.
-I'm Jen, nice to meet you.

My pleasure. Welcome to Thailand.

-Welcome aboard Valor.
-Thank you.

We've got a lot of fun things planned,
so without further ado,

I'm gonna turn you over to Kate,
who will give you a tour of the boat,

-and then we will get the party started.
-All right.

Hi, ladies. Right this way.

-Watch your step right here.
-Oh, thanks.

I'd better watch my red wine intake
on these white couches.

Oh, God. Did they bring
their own floatation devices?

[laughter]

-This is your master stateroom.
-Oh, my gosh, that's beautiful.

They did bring
their own floatation devices.

[Kate] We have two queen rooms,
they're both identical,

-and then one room with two twin beds.
-Yeah, I love it.

Where are we going?

We're gonna set up
a nice beach picnic around 1:30.

-Ooh!
-Fun.

[Tanner] Nice lemon-slicing.

[Simone] Oh, whoopsie!

-[Lee] We ready to go?
-Standing by, Cap.

All right, let's do it, bow to stern, now.

Pull in, pull in, pull in, quickly.
Quickly all the way in.

Show us that booty! [laughs]

[Ashton] Big pull, Rhylee, big pull.

[woman]
Maybe that should be our daily workout.

[Tanner] All right, Cap, that's all lines
on deck, all lines on deck.

-[woman 1] Cheers.
-[woman 2] Bon voyage.

-Cheers, girls.
-Cheers.

[Ashton] Stern is clear of the dock, Cap.

[Kate] It's so weird that we left the dock
without Brian. Like, see you later.

[Courtney] I know!

-Can I come?
-Yes. Oh, wait.

I'm not gonna say what I was gonna say.

[Kate] Do you know
how to cut limes like this?

-This is bad. It looks like...
-[Courtney] Compost.

[Kate] I feel bad, because she clearly...

It's hard to get thin slices that thin.
You gotta really try.

Simone does not know how to cut citrus.

-It looked like this...
-That's what it was!

...like that...

It's like if Helen Keller cut an orange.
It's just, like, all over the place.

-Oh, God.
-[laughter]

-[Ashton] What's up, homie?
How you feeling?

I feel good.
I went down on Simone last night.

You went... [laughs]

-Okay.
-Yeah, it was fun.

What am I doing?

Only got, like, a 12-second handjob,
and I was like...

Oh? A little bit of a tease?

Yeah, blue balls
up the yin-yang right now, though.

I don't know, maybe Kate's right.
Maybe Simone isn't so great at service.

That's funny.

[Lynn] I'll just keep refilling.

I'm kissing lots of girls this trip.

-Tell Rhylee what you just told me.
-Oh, no.

[clears throat]
Went down on Simone last night.

[gasps dramatically]
Why would you tell me that?

Wait, Simone said you only cuddled.
That's a lot more than cuddling.

-That's my idea of cuddling.
-That sneaky little bitch.

-[Courtney] Can I get you a refill?
-Thank you.

-You're welcome.
-Face-down, ass-up, every night.

[Tanner] Captain,
just on standby with the anchor.

Copy that... and drop.

-Okay, anchor secure, Captain.
-[Lee] Start getting the toys.

We need everyone to do a shot
of tequila with us.

[Ashton] Winching down.

Just pretend it's Simone.

[Kate] Holy hell, it's [bleep] hot.

This is Florida summer.

-Permission to proceed, Captain Lee?
-Absolutely.

We would like you to join us
at dinner tonight.

We can arrange that.

-You can wear whatever.
-[Lee laughs]

-What should I give them tonight?
-Is there anything happening tonight?

A white party. Can't make white food.

Which is actually kind of cool,
but I haven't got anything real white.

-Yeah. Well, you can't do chicken?
-I can do chicken breast.

Maybe I just go Italian.
Do like chicken parm, lovely sauce.

-Burrata or mozzarella.
-Yeah, that'd be nice.

I really appreciate Courtney.
I can tell she's got a palate.

Because like,
Kate's not a foodie at all.

Courtney, at least, goes
to nice restaurants with Mom and Dad,

after they go for a pony ride.

[bleep], that's why I love you, sous chef.

-[Courtney giggles]
-[Kate] You never tell me you love me.

-Life, love...
-L'chaim.

...happiness... L'chaim.

Thailand. Bangkok, sh*ts before noon.

-[cheering]
-Amen.

[cellphone ringing]

-[Lee] Hello?
-Captain, it's Brian here, how are you?

I'm doing well, Brian. What's the verdict?

The doctor says he's glad I could come in
because the infection was pretty bad.

-Mm-hmm.
-He had to cut the bottom of my knee open.

And he had to also cut
some of the tissue away

because the infection
was kind of eating away at the tissue.

So I've got a big hole in my leg.

[Lee sighs]

[Brian]
So I've kind of got a big hole in my leg.

There are some conditions.
I can't get it wet.

I must refrain from picking up
anything heavy.

But I can definitely feel that
it's going to be much better.

Okay.

Brian's a hardworking kid,

and I'm sure he doesn't feel good
about this situation either.

Well, we'll ease into it.
We don't need a relapse.

If Brian cannot recover quickly,
he's of no good to me.

-I should be there shortly.
-All right, buddy, look forward to it.

All right, Captain, I'll see you soon.

-Thanks for my drink.
-[Tanner] My pleasure.

Holy sh... it's cold.

I know, it's so good. It's so hot outside.

-[Tanner] Oh, no, no, no!
-Oh, that's really salty.

You wanna see where we're having
our beach picnic? Guess.

-By the second boat.
-Nope, in that cave.

The guests wanna eat lunch on a beach,

but it's hot outside, so I found a cave.
It's my dream beach picnic cave.

-With bats.
-They sleep through the day.

-And then poop on you.
-That's good luck.

It's like a VIP room at a club.

Secluded, dark, away from everybody else,
the general public.

-Cave picnics, this is the new thing.
-Gross!

[both laugh]

[Ashton] Cap, I see a boat approaching
with some blonde and a gimpy leg.

Kick him in his good one.
And tell him welcome back.

-What's up, Tanner?
-Welcome back in.

-How you feeling?
-Much better.

-This is Brian, everybody.
-Are you the one with the bad knee?

Not anymore, it's a good knee now.

Just put that right up here,
you need to elevate it.

Bro, I'm walking, I can actually walk.

-Hey, Simone.
-Brian!

-Hey! How goes it?
-Hi. How are you?

-Good.
-Have you showered?

-No. Smell me.
-[she groans]

I'm covered in hospital germs!

Oh, [bleep] you, just go through, man.

Seafood here in Thailand,

you can tell it just came right
from the sea that morning.

So I'm making sushi
because it's super fresh, super easy.

You're on the beach, it's super hot here,

and it kind of lines the stomach
for these girls

and their cocktails. It just all works.

-It looks great.
-I think it looks like [bleep].

Okay.

-[Lee] The prodigal son returns!
-Thank goodness, I can walk again.

I imagine what they did, there was,
like, an abscess in there.

They pack it with gauze.

Yes. They wanted me on another drug.
And then it should be done from there.

-Well, we're glad to have you back, buddy.
-Thank you very much, Captain.

-Now get changed and get to work.
-Cool.

-[Simone] What do you want me to do?
-Just laundry.

-Okay.
-Thank you.

[Kate] I tried doing service
with Simone last charter,

but I prefer having Courtney on service,

because she's so good at it
and Simone is not.

[sighs]

-I want us to start packing the rib.
-Okay.

We need chardonnay, Sauvignon Blanc...

[Ashton] They come with a lot
of baggage these days.

Look at the jellyfish.

[Kate] Holy crap. It's like we're
[bleep] jellyfish, they're everywhere.

So who's gonna urinate
on me if I get stung?

Tanner and Ashton
might be more than willing.

Huh?

-[Tanner] Touchdown!
-[bleep], that hurts.

-Got enough wine bottles?
-Quick, quick, quick.

-[chittering]
-[Ashton] Those are bats.

-I know they are. Of course, it's a cave.
-Oh, yeah, this is a pretty cool spot.

Do you think
you could hang the disco ball?

I think it'd be really whimsical.

Oh, they sound like they're mad.
They're mean bats.

Espresso martini sh*ts.

-You're so sweet. Thanks.
-We love you.

[Ashton] Woop, woop, woop...

♪ Yet again...'gain ♪

[woman] Whoa!

-[Ashton] All right, let's go, girls.
-Oh, yeah, baby!

-Ashton sandwich.
-[Rhylee] Oh, Tanner.

You gonna sit here?

[Ashton] Batcave, Batcave,
this is Batmobile, en route.

Copy.

-[woman 1] Oh, look how pretty this is.
-It's amazing.

-Oh, my God.
-[Kate] Welcome to the beach.

[woman 2] We're excited to be here.

I've never thrown a beach party
in a location quite like this.

There's a disco ball in the cave!

-Nature is amazing!
-[chittering]

You hear that animal in there?

Oh, [bleep]

-I said, how's the laundry going?
-Good, do you wanna fold stuff?

-What are you doing?
-I have to finish drying stuff upstairs.

-It's just nonstop.
-I know.

[Simone] Like, I'm just getting annoyed.
Kate's been in the industry forever,

and annoying the difference between
like second and third stew

she should be more adamant
on Courtney being more in the laundry.

And me being more on service.

[bleep]

-This is tuna, chicken, and tofu.
-Perfect.

Thank you.

Are we seriously eating sushi
in this beautiful location?

[woman] My chakras are opening.

[Ashton]
So, I struggled to get out of there now.

But the tide's only going further down.

So I'm not gonna be able
to get them out to there now.

-Are there rocks and [bleep] there?
-Yeah, it's like a reef. Yeah.

-Oh, [bleep]!
-Yeah.

[cellphone ringing]

[Kevin] Hello? How are you?

Ah, you've got a Calippo.

I'm working long hours,
so when I get a break,

I think it's just important
to kind of connect with my daughter.

So what else is going on?

Even if that's just to send a few emojis,
my daughter loves that, you know?

Give her a couple of frog emojis.

And then she sends me poop ones back,
you know? Just laughs at herself.

Are you still keen to go to New Zealand
for school holidays?

Because I need to get our plane tickets.

The reason I'm here in yachting
is to provide a better life for her.

For me, it was pretty hard.
Dad wasn't really around.

You know, mom always
had three jobs on the go,

raising four of us kids.

I started putting clothes on my back
at the age of 12, you know?

I'm just working away
all the time, working, working, working.

It's super hard to be away.

Right now I'm just concentrating on my job
and getting back to my daughter.

-Okay, my love, I love you.
-[line disconnects]

-Another round?
-Another round. [chuckles]

[Ashton]
Kate, we have lost a lot of water,

so if you can have Tanner walk out
to the edge of the coral,

I'm gonna give him the water shoes
to take to the guests.

Copy.

The tide's dropped way lower
than we thought it would.

There's coral, there's sea urchins,
it's really not an ideal situation.

-I wanna get one from behind too.
-Now we know how you like it.

Because you wanna get me
from behind, Tanner?

Obviously, good shot, really.

-[Lee] Ashton, Ashton.
-Go ahead, Cap.

How much stuff you got to load up?

It's pretty much all the chairs
and the tables and things.

I can bring those clear-bottom kayaks
in with the bike.

That's not a bad idea.
I'm gonna need to wait here.

Just tell the girls
they have to put them on.

What you're gonna do
is you're gonna put these in the water

-and tie one to each side of your prop.
-Okay.

Oh! Right in the kisser there.

They're not the most stylish,
but I highly recommend putting a pair on.

Ash, Rhylee's on the way with the kayaks.

This tide's is too low.

I feel bad that I'm stepping
on all this coral.

It's kind of scary because you don't know
where you're stepping.

Watch, because there is
a sea urchin to your right.

-when you're coming...
-[bleep]. Oh, God. [bleep].

Something is sticking me.
Oh, my [bleep] God.

-[Kate] Are you okay?
-Ow!

[Ashton]
What you're gonna do, have a look at it.

-[bleep]. Something got me.
-[Tanner] Let me see.

[woman] It's like purpley.

-[Ashton] Did you feel something?
-Yes.

Sea urchin. [bleep] hurts.

We have the tide dropping
extremely quickly,

and we have someone
that stood on a sea urchin.

Any guest getting injured while
in our care is an absolute [bleep]show.

Captain Lee, come save me!

There is something stuck in me.

-Like, in your leg?
-Yes.

-Could be a sea urchin...
-All right, let's head back to the boat.

We'll have a look at that.
Captain Lee, Captain Lee, Ashton.

One of the guests stepped on a sea urchin,

so we got to head back to the boat,
so she can soak it in vinegar.

-Roger that.
-If you wanna just stay on the sand,

-I'll walk the kayaks up.
-Okay.

Oh, my God,
ants everywhere all of a sudden.

-Really?
-Look at my life, look at my shoes.

I'm wearing weird water shoes, sweating,
getting bitten by Thailand bat-cave ants.

It's going great.

-[Brian] Nice one.
-Nice throw, Tanner.

Interior crew, you've got incoming guests
at 60 seconds.

And we're gonna need
a bucket of vinegar, too.

[Simone] I'll get the vinegar out.

[Lee] Sea urchin injuries
are fairly common,

and they're spiny little bastards
on the ocean floor.

If they get stepped on,
one of those spines will break off.

But they're barbed,
so you can't get them out.

You have to dissolve them,

and the easiest way to do it
is the old vinegar trick.

As sweet as it smells, vinegar.

-Okay.
-[bleep]

-Is it painful?
-Mm-hmm.

[Rhylee]
Let's put the equipment in the rescue.

-Careful. There is sea urchins.
-And I'll tow the kayak.

But I kind of wanna have Rhylee tow me.

Just pray no big boats come along.

-[Kate] Take me to the yacht.
-Whoo!

You're doing great.

[panting]

-Is that really as fast as it goes?
-I don't have any higher gears.

Does it have different speeds on it?
Is that all you got?

Courtney, Courtney, Kate.
Can you meet me in the galley for service?

Okay, Simone,
you can go on break till 7:00.

Okie-dokie.

[Brian laughing]

You did well.

Hey, Kevin. So I just went down,
I brought drinks to the guests.

-Okay.
-I said dinner's at 8:00.

-8:00, okay.
-And they were like,

-"Can we eat inside? It's so hot out."
-Okay.

So we're gonna have dinner
with the captain right here at this table.

I cannot believe the guests have requested
to eat so close to the stew pantry.

-We have to work in silence.
-Yeah, I will.

-We have to.
-Yeah, I will.

It just makes everything more difficult.

-We can do anything.
-Yes, we can.

I'm glad you're feeling better, though.
They got it all out.

Yeah, [bleep] definitely, bru.

Hot mama!
You and Tanya both are sparkly girls.

Let's go say hi to Captain Lee.

-I could do that.
-Oh, yeah, oh, yeah, oh, yeah.

Since we're inside, we should use
real candles, like civilized humans.

Tonight we have a lot going on.
It's a white party,

but considering their alcohol consumption
throughout the day,

it's probably gonna be more
like a blackout party. Yay.

-Where's Captain Lee?
-Oh, he's got no shirt on!

[squealing]

[trilling]

Wow, you keep yourself
in nice shape for working on a boat.

Captain Lee, I'm gonna say.
I'm gonna say. You look good, though.

Thank you.

[Kate] Simone, Simone,
can you please start the turndowns?

You'll have to go up this way, and around.

How am I on turn-downs again
when I'm on late service?

It's a joke.

[line ringing]

-[woman] Hello?
-Hi, Mom?

Hello, Simone.

This is absolutely ridiculous.

I am a mathematician,
and I speak all these different languages,

so I can learn how to do service.

How am going to be a better,
like, second stew

if I'm, like, always doing housekeeping
and stuff, you know?

If you feel something's not right,
you need to stand up for yourself.

-You can't just back down.
-Okay.

You say, "I want to grow, I don't want
to be on the same position forever."

Someone needs to teach me, okay?

Like, Kate is probably upset
that I'm smarter than her,

and therefore, she's trying
to make me look dumb, but I'm not.

You say, "I'm more than folding towels,
okay?"

You don't have a PhD in folding towels.

[laughing]

-Oh, my goodness.
-Oh, my goodness.

-Is it a pineapple?
-Good evening, ladies.

Look at this handsome chap.
Oh, my goodness.

-He smells good too.
-Thank you so much.

[Kevin] All right, let's go.

Twenty seconds.

It's kind of nice having
such a quiet galley.

It's a calmer vibe.

[loud buzzing, vibrating]

Except for the appliances.

Sweet, let's do it.

-Can I get you a drink?
-A glass of Sauvignon Blanc?

[sighs]

-Hello, Chef.
-Hey, how are we?

Hi, Kevin.

All right, so just for the first course,
we've just got a beer-battered oyster.

There's a garlic aioli there,
and then just some apples.

Can you say "beer-battered" again?

-Beer batter, beer batter.
-[woman in English accent] Beer batter.

All right, enjoy, guys.

-Thank you.
-Thank you, Chef.

-Mm-hmm! Oh, my God.
-[Lee] Really good.

This dinner's going surprisingly well.

Cheers to Captain Lee.

Because our guests are so hammered.

No, Wendy, you go there,
and then you come back to Jen.

-Come back to Jen.
-[Lee] How quickly they forget.

[laughter]

So this one's really easy,
but I love eating this.

So it's just chicken parm.
I put some lemon zest and parmesan cheese,

with some roasted pine nuts in the crust.

-And then grilled broccolini.
-Yeah.

It's very simple, but tasty, all right?
Thanks guys. Enjoy.

Mm! Oh, my God. It's really good.

This is a great filet of chicken.

We just want everyone to party with us.
We don't want anyone to have to work.

[Simone] This is really irritating.

-You didn't see him with his shirt off.
-[Lee] That was a surprise.

I'm never going to be confident in service
if I'm never there, you know?

You were like Thor with no shirt on.

[laughter]

I had a bad Botox job. Can you tell?

Aye, I'm a pirate.

That's why I have
a hard time finding a man.

[woman] Blah-blah-blah!

I don't fit into a pirate, though.

It's gonna take a really... [indistinct]

-So when it's right, it'll happen.
-That's what I feel like.

-I'm like, "How long have I been single?"
-And Wendy has left.

-What's happening?
-[Kate] We're just plating up dessert.

How about... Can I serve?
Could I be... I gotta do something.

They're all...
I'm so bored with the conversation.

-Like, about relationship kind of stuff.
-We need to break that up.

So if you wanna carry one out,
you can put it in front of the captain.

No, I know how to do that.
I know, like, I will stack 'em up...

-[Kevin] Oh, oh, oh...
-No, no, no... Not... Not good?

No. Just one on each hand?

-Oh, yes, it's great.
-What's happening?

So you just take that one to the captain,
I'll take that one.

Okay, you don't want me on service,
but you have a guest? Seriously?

This is bull[bleep].

You take the captain's,
that's the most important one.

You take that one out. Go, go, go.

-Captain, I'm serving your dessert.
-[woman] Oh, boy.

-[Kate] Here we go.
-[Lee] You, my child, cannot be trusted.

[woman] Kate's gonna keep it classy.

So this is just a take on a tiramisu.
It's not deconstructed, pulled apart,

or anything like that,
but, you know, but it is a take on one.

-Wonderful.
-Enjoy.

[Lee] Meal was good, I enjoyed it.

-[woman 1] So good.
-[woman 2] Taste the dessert.

This is, like, melt-in-your-mouth.

-You excited for tomorrow to be over?
-[Rhylee] Yep.

I'm just a bit irritated at the moment.

You wanna be serving
and not doing laundry?

Especially, because I'm supposed
to be second stew and stuff.

-Well, [bleep], I'm sorry, Sims.
-Thank you.

I worked hard to freaking get here.
I have the experience.

And that's why Kate made me
the second stew,

and she needs
to start treating me like one.

Can someone just change the topic, please?

[Brian] Tanner's an assh*le.
I don't like him on deck, either.

-He's a silver fox.
-Oh, he is a silver fox.

Captain Lee ate so fast and I don't think
it was because he loved it.

So how did you morph
from Chicago to California?

Oh... I followed the Grateful Dead.

[laughter]

Okay.

I lived in a Volkswagen bus.
I was a total hippie.

I sold stir fry around the country.

-I pierced noses and ears.
-And hairs?

-God, this is a revelation.
-I know!

[laughter]

-This man...
-This man.

[Lee] Thank you so much, my dear.
Really had a good time.

-See you guys in the morning.
-Good night, thank you.

Good night.

-How's it going with the girls?
-It's nice to have stewardesses

who don't assume
that if you ask them to do something

you're, like, personally attacking them.

[Rhylee] I feel like Simone looked
a little flustered.

So I'm expecting her
to progress as time goes on.

-And she's not?
-Meh.

My patience is getting less.

[Courtney] Do you know where Simone is?

-No, is she not working?
-I don't know where she went.

[crying]

Simone, Simone, Kate.

[sniffles]

Go ahead, Kate.

What's your 20, Simone?
Courtney was just wondering.

Just in the bathroom.

[Rhylee] She sounded upset.

-She did, actually.
-It sounded like she was crying.

-Courtney?
-Yeah?

Do you maybe wanna check on Simone
and see if she's okay?

Kate, you go talk to her,
I'm not good at this stuff.

It's not my room. It's not my room.

-[Kevin] Simone here.
-What's up?

-You all right?
-Yeah.

I just don't understand
what could be the problem.

I think maybe she's just sensitive.

[Kate] I don't love
that Simone is sulking.

You're not good enough
at your job to sulk right now.

Your best quality was your good attitude.
Don't lose that, honey.

Hey, Simone, are you okay?

-You don't seem okay.
-I just want to talk to you.

[Kevin] What's the matter?

They're having a deep and meaningful
in the stew pantry.

Like, I'd like to be like more
a part of service and stuff.

But I feel maybe you don't want me
to be there.

I don't know what's going on.
No one's saying anything to me.

Do you need me
to tell you all the time what to do?

No, you don't need to tell me
all the time what to do.

-That's what I'm saying, Kate.
-I assumed that you knew

the job well enough
that I didn't have to...

But I also, in my head, like,
I'm thinking that if I'm working lates

then I would be, like,
doing like service and stuff, you know?

Like, it's confusing, Kate.

It feels like Simone acts as if I owe her,

when really, she's not good at her job,
and training is a gift.

I'm not sure
that you're ready to do service.

Am I a [bleep], like,
second stew or whatever?

I'm not sure
that you're a great second stew.

-Okay.
-It's not personal,

but when you go hide
in your bathroom for 25 minutes...

No, I wasn't hiding in my bathroom
for 25 minutes.

I just needed to use the toilet.

And then you came out
and were very sullen.

Because I'd already said
that I'm going to speak to you about it.

And people are just asking me...
like, what's going on?

You told other crew members
you were going to speak to me about it?

It's not appropriate.

The first person you should
ever speak to should be me.

I can see how you would feel
that it's not okay,

-but for me it's just a moment...
-I don't feel that it's not okay,

I'm telling you it's not okay.

And now you've made
our department look bad.

I haven't made our department look bad.

But I'm telling you that you have.

Instead of washing the boat today,
you're gonna wash elephants.

-Look at him.
-Oh, my God.

-He said he went down on you.
-Oh, my God.

And then he said, "She touched it
for, like, eight seconds."

This guy's an assh*le.

[Simone] What the hell.

Tanner is not my boyfriend,
but I do sleep in Tanner's bed.

-[Kate] Gross.
-Tanner, you [bleep] up big time.

-What do you think I am?
-Kind of a bitch.

Brian!

This is a crew mess shared
by the whole crew and the captain.

I agree.

[Lee] Come tomorrow, we're gonna have
a come-to-Jesus meeting,

where I say you sure were
a dumb [bleep] last night.

What respect do you have for yourself,
and for your [bleep] captain?

Who the [bleep] do you think you are?

[sobbing]