01x08 - Life is a Highway

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "The Girls on the Bus". Aired: March 14, 2024 – present.*
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Chronicles 4 female journalists who follow every move of a parade of flawed presidential candidates, while finding friendship, love, and scandal along the way.
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01x08 - Life is a Highway

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[TENSE MUSIC]

♪ ♪

[INDISTINCT MUTTERING]

- Senator Walker!
- [REPORTERS CLAMORING]

Sometimes, a story takes
on a life of its own,

getting entirely out of your control.

Senator Walker, what is the nature

of your relationship with Blaine Novak?

I understand you want to make a point,

but all I can do is reiterate
what I've already said.

How long have you known
about his abusive behavior?

- Alleged behavior.
- Oh, Benji, please.

Do you blame Novak for being
bulldozed on Super Tuesday?

We knew it was gonna be
a tight race going in.

It was more than tight.

Your campaign was basically crushed.

And we fought for every vote.

I am proud of my campaign.

Bullshit.

Are you gonna return
his money the same way

you returned d*ck Braun's
in your last election?

d*ck Braun was a convicted criminal

who defrauded investors
and preyed on Americans...

And Blaine Novak has taken advantage...

And I immediately broke ties with him.

Which was a really good
move. What are you gonna do...

The allegations against Blaine Novak

are still being investigated.

Senator Walker, this is an opportunity

for you to give us your side.

Do you condone puppy play?

Jesus, Margaret, puppy play...

Thanks for coming out.

But we have a town hall tomorrow.

And my focus right now is
on answering the questions

of the American people.

As the press pack joined
the feeding frenzy,

they were missing the
story behind the story.

Who paid Declan Morales to
dig up the dirt on Walker

to begin with and why?

That's what I was chasing.

But first, I had my own
problem to deal with.

I appreciate that, Dr. Collins.

I didn't mean to put you
in a difficult situation.

Like I said, I waited
as long as I could.

Yes, yes, I will definitely be there.

I'll... I'll call you
as soon as I get them.

Okay, thank you.

Hey, what the hell are
you doing over here?

Your girl just got destroyed.

Destroyed.

She's not my girl.

And I've got my own problems right now.

What's wrong?

What?

Uh...

so I'm pregnant.

- What the f*ck?
- Holy sh*t.

Yep, that was my reaction too.

Wait, wait, what?

You have been getting
laid this entire time

and you're still this tense?

One time. I got laid one time.

Well, three times, one night.

But I am handling it, or
at least I was trying to.

But then my pills didn't
make it to me in time,

and now my doctor can't ship
them to me here because...

Abortion is illegal in Missouri.

Correct.

That is such bullshit.

Agree. Hate the world. Not the time.

Okay, well, what happens now?

Well, I just got off
the phone with my doctor

who is going to ship the
pills to a PO box in Illinois,

which is only a four-hour drive away.

Good, good, that gets you
back for tomorrow's town hall.

Well, it would be good,

but my driver's license
expired, like, forever ago,

so that would make driving
to Illinois difficult.

Jesus Christ, Sadie, how can you let

your driver's license expire?

I... I take the subway.

No New Yorker has a
valid driver's license.

I do.

[LAUGHS] Except for Kimberlyn!

Okay, I'm supposed to be doing
some interviews this morning,

but let me see if it's
too late to back out.

I mean, I have a license,

but I can't legally rent a car yet.

Hello?

My point was, I have a license.

I can drive you.

Are you... okay with that?

Yeah.

I might not agree with the choice,

but that doesn't mean I
can't be there for my friend.

- Thanks, Kimberlyn.
- Yeah.

This g*dd*mn patriarchal
motherfuck of a country!

The fact that this is even happening...

- Again!
- Is so insane!

Are you joking? It is your body!

- We cannot keep doing this!
- It's true.

What is it, 1527?

♪ Go on, take everything ♪

♪ Take everything, take everything ♪

♪ Take everything ♪

The Democrats are a disaster.

Look, you've got a rich guy
famous for playing a fish.

And you got a socialist

who's younger than some of my socks.

That's not fair.

Chris, we're still the party that cares

- about working people.
- Okay.

One thing that I find
interesting is actually...

All due respect,
Senator, Chris is right.

In my 40-plus years covering politics,

I've never seen the
party in such disarray.

But I also place some of the
blame on my fellow journalists.

By fellow journalists, he means me.

Unfortunately, yes.

Before Gary Hart, no major news outlet

would have published
tawdry front-page stories

about a man wearing dog
collars and using pee pads.

You'd rather ignore the fact

that a presidential candidate
took money and advice

- from a billionaire...
- Grace...

Who abused his power over young women?

Grace, you know the evidence
tying Novak to Walker

is tenuous at best.

It's tabloid trash.

You're chasing clicks instead of
reporting on issues that matter.

It's called investigative journalism.

And it is our job, our responsibility

to question whether or not
these candidates can hold

the highest position of power.

And part of that is
scrutinizing their inner circle.

You chose to turn a blind eye

when Gary Hart had
Donna Rice on his lap,

not because of professional integrity,

but because behind closed doors,

you were pulling the exact same sh*t.

[SCATTERED CLAPPING]

Wow. Wow.

Thanksgiving must be super
fun with your family, huh?

Anyway, more on this Walker-Novak
disaster after the break.

Yeah, I know you would have driven me,

but Kimberlyn offered,
and you can't leave Walker

to go on an abortion road
trip, especially not right now.

I'm... hey, I'm gonna be fine.

I promise.

Okay. Bye.

- Everything okay?
- Yeah.

So I broke it down, and if we start

with the original Broadway
cast recording of "Les Mis,"

that'll give us an hour and 45 minutes.

And after that, we can
slide right into Sondheim

or, you know, switch
gears and podcast it up.

Oh, oh, I downloaded
a range of audiobooks.

Is Maggie Gyllenhaal reading
"The Bell Jar" too dark?

Or we could just use
the time to meditate.

It's one of the things
I love about driving.

You can just get in,
let your mind wander,

and see where it takes you.

Okay. Yeah, sure.

I... I like to meditate.

But so, like, you mean the whole time?

Well, it seems like
your message is starting

to resonate with voters.

Well, the message hasn't
changed, Margaret, but I was...

I was shaking hands at a rally last week

and someone handed me their baby,

and the next thing you know, I'm a meme.

- You guys... you guys see that?
- Hilarious.

You did. How cute was that kid?

- Oh, my goodness, adorable.
- Very cute.

You should have seen
the cheeks on this kid.

Very trusting.

Oh, thank you. I should hope so.

Okay, I got you two scoops,

and if you want more hot
fudge, just say the word.

Also, there are sprinkles to spare.

So you're so hyper right now. [LAUGHS]

I know.

I still feel guilty.

Lola, don't feel bad.
I told you, I'm not mad.

I att*cked your boss in public,

and now half of my fan
base is bailing on her.

They're probably not even gonna vote.

I wouldn't blame you for hating me.

Lola, I believe in the
separation of church and state.

My job is my job and my life is my life.

Besides, part of why I fell
for you is your passion.

As soon as this election is over,

I think we should take a trip somewhere.

I'm dying to go to Tulum.

You think we're still gonna be
hanging out after the election?

Don't you?

I mean, I just didn't
want to assume anything,

but I kind of hoped that we would.

Okay, well, then we definitely should.

- Yeah, we should.
- Yeah.

Also, how are we not
posting this right now?

It's f*cking adorable.

Where's your phone?

- Okay.
- Okay?

Wait, give me this.

[UPBEAT MUSIC]

[CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS]

[DOOR CLICKS]

Well done, kiddo.

- Spicy stuff.
- What do you want, Dad?

I'm late for a string of NPR hits.

Well, a "thank you" would be nice.

I just gave your little
story a lot more traction.

You guys were fantastic out there.

- Thanks.
- Fiona Perry,

features director at "Vanity Fair."

I'm here promoting our issue on issues.

Ah, it's very nice to meet you.

I'm running a little bit late, so...

Oh, I'll be quick.

Peggy Romero is sh**ting a spread

on media dynasties for the
New Establishment tomorrow.

I know it's last-minute, but we'd love

to include the two of you.

That sounds terrific, Fiona.

- We'd be happy to.
- Oh, hold on.

I'm supposed to be covering
the town hall tomorrow.

I'll have to check with my editor first.

Give me a call. I'll
give you all the details.

We'd love to make this work.

Thanks.

Check with your editor?

Really?

Come on, Gracie. It'll be fun.

Oh, nothing with you is ever fun.

What are you talking about?

That panel we just did was a blast.

Are you insane?

What... a blast?

You interrupted me and then
att*cked me for no reason.

That's our shtick.

What are you getting so upset about?

It's all just theater, Gracie,
like Carville and Matalin.

But you know that.

I thought we were both in on the joke.

[SCOFFS]

f*ck me.

Well, Senator Walker's campaign has
said that this story is a hit job

fed to the media by one of her enemies.

- What is your reaction to that?
- It's her usual spin.

And it doesn't change the
fact that she's casting blame

and dodging our questions.

- f*ck!
- Which is a shame

because this is a real opportunity

to put this story behind her

and start engaging voters.

Oh? How so?

There are still a lot of open questions

about her connection to Blaine Novak.

What did Walker know about
these sexual abuse allegations

- and when?
- Oh, my God.

Shouldn't you be doing
some of these interviews?

No, I hate interviews.

I always say something stupid

and then obsess about it for weeks.

It's not worth it.

Then what are you so mad about?

I'm mad because Grace is right.

Walker is screwing this up.

So you're mad at Walker?

Oh my God, Sadie, the way
you let that horrible woman

- get under your skin.
- She's not under my skin.

- And she's not horrible.
- Oh, please.

You think that she really
didn't know about Novak?

- Come on.
- We don't know for sure.

And I, for one, am certainly not ready

to jump to any conclusions.

So fine, at best,

she is a horrible judge of character,

and, at worst, she's corrupt.

[PHONE BUZZING]

If you need to take that, I
can put my AirPods back in.

It's fine.

It's... it's the guy.

Oh.

It's fine. I'll call him back later.

So does that mean, like,
you two are still a thing?

No. No. No, we never really were.

I mean, it's... it's complicated.

Clearly.

Getting pregnant was like, "sh*t."

[SCOFFS]

[INARA GEORGE'S "SLOW DANCE"]

I obviously am not ready to have a baby.

But I...

I might want one,

eventually.

And if I were gonna have a kid, I...

wouldn't mind having one with him.

So you like him.

♪ It isn't right ♪

I do like him.

♪ It isn't light ♪

♪ We just wake it up and watch it fly ♪

Yeah, I like him a lot.

♪ Last night, I slow-danced
with younger men ♪

[PHONE BUZZING]

Hey, sister. What's up?

Hey, I'm just making sure you're okay.

I know you changed your mind
about your favorite socialist,

but these tweets this
morning were really vicious.

What are you talking about?

I haven't tweeted anything today.

Um, "Althea Abdi stopped persisting

and sold the f*ck out.

#DefundTheBitch."

What the f*ck?

"Althea Abdi talks progressive values,

but is lying through her capped teeth."

Locked out? Come on.

And now you've got
all her little fanboys

threatening to come after you,

so I just want to make sure you're safe.

Hey, let me call you back, okay?

[LINE DINGS]

[LINE TRILLING]

Lola Rahaii.

I knew you'd come
crawling back eventually.

Look, Ashleigh, I know things didn't end

that great between us, but
I really need your help.

I'm gonna tell you what I
told my mother last Christmas.

You are toxic. Lose my number.

Somebody hacked my Twitter account.

Can you please just call
your contact over there

and get me back in, please?

What do you mean hacked?

Somebody took over my account and posted

a bunch of nasty sh*t
pretending to be me,

and now all of the Freshman's fanboys

are coming after me really hard.

Look, I just got a puppy,
so that's my priority, obvi.

But I'll do what I can. And
you're gonna owe me. Big.

Yeah, fine. Whatever.

Oh, my God, this traffic!

This thing just added
another five minutes.

- We'll make it.
- But the place closes at 5:00.

I'm aware, and we will make it.

[BRIGHT SHOWTUNE PLAYING]

[PHONE DINGS]

- Oh, sh*t.
- Oh, what now?

Walker, she's bailing on the town hall.

She's fundraising, which is
code for going into hiding.

God damn it.

♪ ♪

This still doesn't prove anything, okay?

She might just need the money.

You know what, Sadie, believe it or not,

I don't care about Walker.

But I do need to make a phone call.

Can I trust you not to
listen to this conversation?

Yeah, yeah, of course.

Hi, this is Kimberlyn
Kendrick for Patti.

Oh, okay. Would you please let her know

that my schedule has suddenly opened up

and I have a window tomorrow?

So if they still want
to meet, I'm available.

Thanks.

Who's they?

I'm sorry. Sorry.

Never mind. Never mind.

Are you leaving Liberty Direct News?

Sadie, this is not a real thing.

I'm mostly happy where I am,

although "happy" is a dumb word.

Are you happy at "The Sentinel"?



Oh.

Well, then you are very lucky.

You know what? I think this is it.

Oh, my God. Oh, yes.

[SOMBER MUSIC]

♪ ♪

- [LOCK CLICKS]
- Hey... oh, wait. What?

No, come on!

Hello?

It's not actually 5:00 yet.

It's 4:59, assh*le!

Are you serious?

Sir!

Hello!

Open the door, dickwad!

- Sadie. Sadie.
- What the f*ck?

- Take a breath.
- No, I'm out of breaths.

I need those pills.

I know. I know you do.

- What am I supposed to do?
- We're gonna figure it out.

I don't know how to figure this out.

We're gonna figure it out. Come on.

God, what a little buttface.

I know.

[PHONE BUZZING]

About damn time.

Does this mean we're
back on speaking terms,

or are you calling to yell at me?

Because I have had a day.

I'm a bit worried, Grace.

- Why? What happened now?
- Nothing.

That's the problem.
Annie's gone radio silent.

I haven't heard from her since
you canceled her credit card.

I mean, this is the longest we've gone

without some kind of communication.

Well, that makes sense. She's mad.

Well, then how is she
paying for everything?

The same way most kids pay for things.

She's probably selling pictures
of her feet on the internet.

Or they're selling dr*gs again.

Charlie, you didn't raise our
daughter to be a drug dealer.

She's smarter than that.

I hope so.

Hey, I, um...

I caught the end of you
and Harold on "Chris Hale."

That looked like fun.

You sound like my dad.

For the record, I wasn't having any fun.

I know.

But, apparently, that's all on me.

According to my father, I've
been overreacting my whole life.

"Vanity Fair" thought we
made such a great team,

they want us to do a
photo sh**t tomorrow.

Dad is obsessed with
the idea, of course.

- You're gonna do it?
- You think I shouldn't?

No, no, no, I mean, I just...

I love that you're just
entertaining the idea.

I mean, if you and your
dad can resolve your issues,

then it gives me hope that maybe
everything with Annie might be okay.

Well, how so?

She hates me way less than you hate him.

[CHUCKLING] Yeah.

Man, these hotel rooms
really do all look the same.

They really do.

You... you don't have to stay with me.

You know, you got me all the way here.

- I can just Lyft tomorrow.
- Don't be crazy.

You know how much that'll cost you?

Well, I'm already out


so might as well just go broke.

- $800?
- Yeah.

Yeah, they make it pretty impossible.

You know, I am way too
tired to drive back anyway.

I'd much rather sleep.

I just wish I had a change of clothes.

Well, you relax and...

and I'll go get us some things.

Oh, you don't have to do that.

Kimberlyn, please let me
do something nice for you.

You are literally saving my life.

I wish you wouldn't put it that way.

I wish it didn't feel that way.

I'll be back.

Okay, so I posted on
TikTok and Instagram.

- And you're reposting me, right?
- Yes, yes.

Okay, good, because the more we can

get the word out that somebody
is targeting me, the better.

Babe, babe, I got you, but you can't

go overboard with this stuff.

It's gonna look like you're lying.

Oh, my God, I f*cking hate social media.

You can't win with these trolls.

When I find out which one
of those d*ck sh*t fanboys

- did this to me, I swear...
- Okay, take a b*at.

You don't know that the
fanboys are behind this.

- Who else would it be?
- Don't get unhinged.

f*ck Twitter. Let's just...

try and fix the situation another way.

How?

I'll talk to the Freshman.

I'll see if I can get her
to do an interview with you.

If she believes you,
everyone will believe you.

Yeah, but she won't go for it.

She hates me.

But she trusts me, okay?

If I vouch for you, she'll do it.

[SIGHS]

You're, like, incredible.

- You know that, right?
- Yeah.

[LAUGHS] Back at you.

Thank you.

I also got UNO!, nail polish,

Ding Dongs, and White Claw.

So cute, but I do think I'm
gonna have to call it a night.

No, no. No hitting the hay.

No more meditating.

We are hanging out.

Oh, look.

"Do You Know Me?" Girl, no.

Come on, it's fun. It's really fun.

And the questions don't
even get that personal.

Let me show you.

"Has blank ever thrown up in public?"

Well, we all know that you have.

I don't know what you're talking about.

And I'm not playing your dumbass game.

Okay, fine, forget the game.

Ask me... ask me anything.
Anything you want to know.

Anything? Really?

Go for it.

Okay, um... mm.

What made you want to
become a journalist?

Softball, huh?

Well, that's easy: my dad.

We used to read the newspaper together.

And he would make me do

the who, what, when, where, and why.

Turned me into a real news junkie.

That's sweet.

He must be really proud of
how successful you've become.

Uh, I wouldn't know.

We don't talk.

It sucks, but at least I can blame him

for all my problems with men.

[LAUGHS]

Okay, my turn.

[CLEARS THROAT]

What is Kimberlyn Kendrick's dream job?

Because we all know it's not
working for Liberty Direct News.

I don't have one.

That's the problem. It just...

it feels like there's no place out there

that's just the right fit for me.

- Okay, so make one.
- Yeah?

I should just go Oprah
that sh*t right up?

- [LAUGHS]
- Sure, why not?

Okay, I don't know.

[LAUGHING] Kimberlyn!

You could have your own media company

like Ben Smith or Megyn Kelly

or those... those dudes at Puck.

Honestly, all I've
ever really wanted to be

is Gayle King.

- Oh, hell yes.
- Right?

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

So make it happen.

Okay, so it's not like

I haven't thought about this at all.

It's just, it would
really take real money.

- You have money.
- No, Eric has money.

And it's not like I can
ask my father for a handout.

My dad built his fortune
from the ground up.

And he would expect me to do the same.

It just wouldn't feel
right any other way.

I don't know.

Maybe one day. [CHUCKLES]

[SIGHS]

[UPBEAT MUSIC]

So have you ever paid
for a psychic reading?

- Yes or no?
- [BOTH LAUGH]

Whoa!

♪ I'm feeling right tonight ♪

Grace, meet the legend Peggy Romero.

Oh, I think we actually met
before in the bathroom line

at the Bloomberg-VF party

at the White House
Correspondents' Dinner.

Yes, you're right.

Harry Styles jumped the queue.

Indeed. [LAUGHTER]

Fiona. Do I get to keep this?

Harold, you look fabulous.

Me? What about her?

She looks like a movie
star, don't you think?

Shall we?

Thank you. [LAUGHS]

All right, so we want
this to be playful, fun.

Just enjoy each other.

Let's have you about right here.

All right.

Harold, let's have you around here.

Use the space.

Feel free to move around.

Have some fun.

Music!

♪ Let's go, I'm a big mood ♪

♪ You can't name a lot of
things that I didn't do ♪

♪ I'm stackin' paper like
a book, not a Kindle ♪

♪ You outdated, I'm the
one they gettin' into ♪

♪ And I don't break a
sweat, let's get it ♪

♪ Let's get it, let's get it ♪

Is this music supposed to be helping?

Guys, let's k*ll the music.

Why don't we just do
something like this?

- Oh! Dad.
- What?

Sorry, sorry. I...
did I squeeze too hard?

No, no, no, I just...
I wasn't expecting that.

Oh.

But just maybe hold my hands?

Perfect. This is perfect.

[CAMERAS SHUTTERS SNAPPING]

Good.

Wonderful.

[SOFT MUSIC]

This is really working. Lovely.

Really nice, you guys.

Let's go. We gotta hit the road.

- Come on.
- Okay, calm down.

The place doesn't even open
for another couple hours.

Hey, did you see that Hot
White Guy is up in the polls?

It looks like it's getting close.

I don't trust polls anymore.

And I need you out of your pajamas.

We've got a pit stop to make in
Chicago before we pick up my pills.

What's in Chicago?

You're having coffee with Gayle King.

[LAUGHS]

Sadie, what did you do?

I did a profile on her
a couple years back.

I remembered she had a place
at the Water Tower Palace.

So I texted her, just on the off chance

that she was in the neighborhood.

You did not. Sadie!

You have a dream.

Gayle King can help you make it happen,

or at least help you
figure out how to do it.

- Sadie!
- Trust me,

meeting your heroes
can change your life.

I know this from experience.

[WHISPERING] Oh, my God.

- You gotta get dressed. Hurry.
- Okay, yes.

- We gotta go.
- [PHONE BUZZING]

Yes, yes, yes. Um, okay.

[PHONE BUZZING]

I hear congratulations are in order.

Eh, I don't trust polls.

So will I be seeing you at
the town hall later today,

Ms. McCarthy?

You know the drill, Mr. Mayor.

If Walker isn't there, I'm not there.

But there will be plenty
of other reporters there

to record your every word.

Yeah, but, somehow, my
words always sound better

when you write about them.

Ha-ha.

- Good luck.
- Good luck?

So you are rooting for me.

sh*t.

Very nice.

- Lovely.
- That's nice.

Oh, wait, wait, you look
just like Annie in that one.

It's remarkable.

Oh, you think so?

- Is Annie your daughter?
- Yeah.

Great kid... smart, funny,
beautiful like her mother.

We should have asked
her to join us today.

Does she work in the industry?

No, no, she's still in school.

I mean, not currently.

She's taking a gap year.

Well, I wouldn't exactly
call it a gap year, but okay.

You're too hard on her.

Well, you don't know anything
about our relationship, so...

Sure, I do. We talk all the time.

She called me this morning,
as a matter of fact.

You talked to Annie this morning?

Yeah, she's very upset
about your cutting her off.

I sent her some money.

Are you f*cking kidding me?

My granddaughter is out there

in the middle of nowhere
with zero support.

I frankly question how you and
Charles are raising this child.

Don't give me parenting advice.

I just made the hardest decision

I have ever had to make
to try to teach my daughter

an important life lesson,

and you just swoop in and undermine it

without even talking to me first?

Nothing to talk about. You were wrong.

Have you lost your mind?

You have no right to
interfere with my family.

You failed as a father.

Oh, here we go again.

I'm the worst dad in the world,

but somehow you turned out just fine.

In spite of you, not because of you.

This was a mistake.

I never should have come here today.

- I was kidding myself...
- Grace.

Thinking that you wanted us to do this

so that we could share
something nice together.

But no, all you ever
cared about is this.

- The attention.
- Gracie...

People doting on you,

telling you how amazing you are.

The theater. That's what you love.

Not me. Never me.

- That is not true.
- You know what? I don't care.

I don't care about any of it anymore.

Just... just stay the
hell away from my family.

Grace.

Grace, please.

[STEADY PERCUSSIVE MUSIC]

- Uh...
- And what is your position...

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

I'm not sure I do either.

Hold that thought. I'll be right back.

Lola Rahaii, my favorite reporter.

[SCOFFS] Yeah, right.

Pretty sure I just saw
you offering a hand job

to those "Wall Street Journal" assholes.

Well, I will talk to anyone

who will put me in their paper, so...

Yeah, I don't have a paper, so...

Even better. No one reads them anymore.

What do you say, quick one-on-one

after the town hall wraps up?

Thanks, but I'm here for the Freshman.

Really?

I'm surprised you guys are on
speaking terms after California.

- You saw that, huh?
- Everyone saw that.

And, hey, look, you were right

to call her out on the flip-flopping.

That's one of the things I
despise about career politicians.

She's not... we're making peace.

That's what the interview is for.

Interesting. Whose idea was that?

What the f*ck, dude?

It's my idea.

Why does it matter so much?

Well, it just seems that an interview

benefits her more than it benefits you.

Now if you'll excuse me,

I'm gonna go offer BuzzFeed a BJ.

[LAUGHS]

[SCOFF]

♪ ♪

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

Oh, my God. She's right there.

Yeah.

You know what, I can't
do it. No. I can't.

Of course you can. What
are you talking about?

I'm gonna be right next
to you the whole time.

You're gonna be amazing.
It's gonna be great.

- Okay.
- [PHONE BUZZING]

Oh, actually, never mind.

- Start without me.
- What? No.

You're gonna be great.

Go... hurry. Don't keep Gayle waiting.

- Hey, what's up?
- So a friend of mine,

who might or might not be
in the CIA, finally emerged.

Declan Morales?

Holy sh*t.

Don't get too excited.

He might go right back into
hiding when he hears what I want.

Oh, my God, oh, my
God, he's gonna tell you

who paid him to dig
up the dirt on Walker!

Oh, my God! Who do you think it is?

- I have a few theories.
- Me too.

But whoever it is, we're
gonna run with it, right?

Only if it's newsworthy.

Of course it's newsworthy.

Someone paid to take her down.

Yeah, it's called politics, okay?

Rove, Atwater, Ailes, David
Brock, everybody does it.

But voters deserve to know.

Was this a right-wing hit job?

A foreign adversary
with an axe to grind?

If she deserved it,
fine. But if she didn't...

The truth will reveal itself eventually.

Just ask the DNC.

Eventually may be too late.

This puppy play sh*t is
dominating the news cycle

and completely engulfing her campaign.

We need to figure out

who wanted this story out there and why.

Look, your reporting is solid

regardless of who leaked it or why.

Just remember that.

I just refuse to let
this woman blame me again

if she loses this election.

Well, do not blame yourself.

Ever. You hear me?

When are you back in New York?

Uh, next week.

We'll have lunch?

I'd like that. But also...

And I'll text you when I get Declan.

Okay. [CHUCKLES]

sh*t. Oh, no.

You know this is a Sharpie, right?

We're gonna protect Social Security.

People deserve to grow old with dignity.

Although you guys, you
look like you never age.

- What's happening here?
- I love that.

But, you know, you can just be a boss.

You don't have to qualify
it with gender, right?

- Hey.
- Hey.

Okay, so here are the talking
points for the interview.

Ready to go?

Talking points? I...

Lola, please. We have
a full slate today.

You can skip the apology
if it feels too weird.

Yeah, all of these feel weird.

These aren't even questions.
These are, like, compliments.

They're talking points.

Lola, look, this is
sh*t you both agree on.

Why are you being such a c**t about it?

Look, I know that you're stressed

and that you put yourself out
there to get me this, but...

Can you please just
read what's on this paper

and say some nice things about her

so I don't lose my f*cking job?

No. Sorry, but I can't do that.

[SURFBORT'S "LOT LIZARD 93"]

[SPUNKY ROCK MUSIC]

Oh, my God, she was so funny.

She's telling me all these jokes.

And then she said that she would call

this guy Johnny Beamer for
me. He's a media consultant.

Apparently, he knows how to
make all sorts of things happen.

That's awesome. You should call him.

You think that I should call him first?

Or should I wait for her to call him?

You know what? She might forget.

I could reach out myself.

Right. Right. Make a right.

Oh, I'm sorry, sorry, sorry.

♪ I am just an angel ♪

♪ Living in a nightmare ♪

♪ Life is just a game ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Laugh away the pain ♪

♪ Ha-ha! ♪

Hello?

[WHISPERING] sh*t.

[NORMALLY] Hi.

Hi, there should be
a package here for me.

It was supposed to come here yesterday.

It's for Sadie McCarthy.

ID, please.

Yes.

There you go.

This is expired.

Excuse me?

Your driver's license.

[CHERRY GLAZERR'S "HUMBLE PRO"]

It's expired.

[CHAOTIC ROCK MUSIC]

♪ I walked into the kitchen ♪

♪ And I said, "Hey,
baby, what's cooking?" ♪

Give me my f*cking pills!

[SCREAMS]

Um, I know.

Yeah, I live in New York.

- It's very common...
- All good.

Just making sure you knew.

Cool.

Thank you so much.

Thank you.

[KNOCK AT DOOR]

I don't have time to talk.

I'm catching a flight.

Magazine called, said you backed out.

Actually, it was a
fact-checker that called.

Fiona didn't have time, apparently.

You know what he said to me?

Dad, I can't...

He said he's a big fan... of yours.

I get that all the time.

"Oh, you're Grace
Gordon Greene's father.

I love her."

I'm sorry that bothers you so much.

Me too, because it really does.

Well, I'll say it again:
you are a shitty dad.

I know that.

I've always known that.

I made a choice to put all
my energy into this job.

And it seems I don't
even have that anymore.

People used to know me.

Now I'm just somebody's
dad, and I hate it.

[SOFT MUSIC]

I'm jealous of you.

- You are not.
- Not of your career, no.

No, I'm... I'm proud of you for that.

I'm jealous because
you got to have it all.

You have a good man in Charles.

Annie loves you.

- I'm not so sure about that.
- Oh, don't be a fool, Gracie.

The girl worships the
ground you walk on.

Why do you think she's working so hard

to separate herself from you?

She's trying to figure out who she is

outside your giant shadow.

Well, I know how that feels.

♪ ♪

I... I'm sorry.

I shouldn't have given her that
money without your permission.

That was wrong.

I won't interfere
with your family again.

Well, just... just... [SIGHS]

Talk to me next time first, okay?

♪ ♪

Annie needs all of us.

♪ ♪

Okay.

[PHONE BUZZING]

- Yo.
- I am such a good person.

Almost Christlike.

Even though you no longer make me money,

I talked to my Twitter
guy about your account.

Hey, Mariah Hairy,

if you take another sh*t in that coat,

I'm not buying you
any more clothes, okay?

Come on. [KISSES]

- Let's go.
- Hello?

He says you haven't been hacked.

Just your password has been changed.

But he can let you back in.

What do you mean my
password's been changed?

- How does that happen?
- It doesn't.

Have you left your
phone alone with anyone,

anyone who might know your password?

Girl, someone is f*cking with you.

[LIZZO'S "CRY BABY"]

♪ Pull this car over, babe ♪

♪ Don't pretend like you don't know ♪

♪ A lot of girls have
time for this sh*t ♪

If you're here to apologize, I'll
take it in the form of a Pabst.

[SCOFFS] I'm not staying.

It's hard to imagine
buying a drink for somebody

who's been using me this entire time.

You played me.

You changed my Twitter password
and posted all that sh*t

to freak me out just so that I would

interview your bitch-ass candidate

and get my base back in her camp.

To be fair, you did
kind of lose your mind.

You started hating on her,

which could seriously
cost her this election.

♪ I don't need to apologize ♪

♪ Us big girls gotta cry ♪

You know, you're gonna lose, Josie.

And when you do, you will have nothing.

And then one day, you're gonna get drunk

because you're feeling
all sad and pathetic

because your life is
basically meaningless.

And you're gonna text me

because you miss me.

And you want to know what I'm gonna do?

f*ck the f*ck off.

f*ck off!

[CLEARS THROAT]

♪ Cry ♪

I swear to God, Charlie.

It's like all the thousands
of dollars I spent on therapy

just miraculously paid off.

I mean, all of a sudden,
everything was so clear.

And how long do you imagine

you can hang on to this clarity?

I'm sure it'll be gone by tomorrow.

But, man, does it feel good right now.

sh*t.

What now?

I lost Annie.

What do you mean you lost her?

We share our locations.

We've been doing it since high school.

But somehow, she just shut it off.

Okay, well, just try and call her.

- All right, hold on.
- [LINE BEEPS]

This is Annie. Leave a...

It went straight to voice mail.

sh*t.

Okay, let's not panic.

I haven't been panicking
this entire time

because I know exactly
where in the world

our daughter is at every moment,

and now I don't. She's gone.

With some assh*le drug dealer in a van.

This is all my fault.

I just... I never
should have cut her off.

It's not your fault. It's...

if this was a mistake,
then we made it together.

[SOMBER MUSIC]

♪ ♪

[LAPTOP DINGS]

sh*t.

sh*t.

Loafers.

Sometimes the only thing more terrifying

than the state of American politics

is the state of our own lives.

As political reporters,
we spend so much time

writing about other
people, we rarely have time

to think about ourselves.

Maybe that's why we do it.

[TIMER DINGING]

It's one hell of a distraction.

Until it's not.

♪ ♪

[KNOCK AT DOOR]

- Hi.
- We come bearing Twizzlers.

- And a heating pad.
- I brought wine.

- Hm.
- It's for me.

Guys, that's so sweet.

We thought you might want company.

- Or not.
- Just giving you the option.

I appreciate it, but
I think I'm actually...

We could watch "Thelma and Louise."

I just downloaded it on my phone.

Y'all's road trip inspired me.

Oh, my God, I do love that movie.

[UPBEAT MUSIC]

- Everyone loves that movie.
- Yes!

Oh, I live for the happy ending.

Two women falling in love,

riding off into the sunset together.

Oh, it's so good.

What?

Sweetie, what is not what happens.

They die.

What?

- No f*cking way.
- Mm-hmm.

Okay, well, now I feel
like we have to watch it.

I am not watching a Ridley
Scott movie on your phone.

Yeah, no problem. I'll
throw it on the TV.

You know how to use the Airplay?

You guys are so f*cking old. I cannot.

Sadie, if you want us out
of here, just say the word.

Maybe just until Brad Pitt gets naked,

'cause I'm gonna need
some alone time for that.

[LAUGHTER]

Oh, my God, you guys know me so well.

- Here, get in here.
- Yeah, come here.

- Yes, thank you.
- Ugh, sorry, sorry.

- [GRUNTS]
- This is for you.

- Oh, thank you.
- Yay!

Oh, my gosh, it's so warm already.

Ugh, this movie so holds up.

Yeah, it really does.

You guys are sure they die?

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

Hey, have a good night. Appreciate it.

Hey, thanks so much for coming out.

Oh, you guys were great. I
appreciate you. Thank you.

- Sir, you have a call.
- Oh.

Five bucks says it's my mom, huh?

Guys, don't forget to vote, all right?

Thank you, Vince. Can
you give me a second here?

Yeah.

Hey. What's up?

No, it went fine.

They love me wherever
the f*ck we are right now.

Oh, I forgot to mention, the influencer,

I got her to mention me.

No, McCarthy wasn't there tonight.

I'm not worried about
"The Sentinel," though.

I got 'em eating out
of the palm of my hand.

Yeah, what do we got
lined up for tomorrow?

[SCOFFS]

[UPBEAT COUNTRY MUSIC]

♪ ♪

Greg, move your head.

Bye.
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