02x02 - Episode 2

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Not Only... But Also". Aired: 29 November 1964 – 24 December 1970.*
Watch/Buy Amazon


British sketch comedy show starring Peter Cook and Dudley Moore.
Post Reply

02x02 - Episode 2

Post by bunniefuu »

[Applause]

as I pain in the for Harper yeah no

cheating

oh you're not being brave they getting

rapidly a cool again yeah well I have a

look ah oh there are there are there

it's 98° point for past normal and

that's normal dad I said dreadful thing

to bear this car yeah I feel people I

know although this time of the year

there should be about ninety point three

it's normal I'm having a call don't you

I mean what would this God have to

plague us with germs and things how dare

you say that

how dare you accuse god of plague you

with germs it's never gonna saw the

germs are plagued by youth our law Juno

the Jerome's were the first things to be

invented first thing was created was a

German they say better be germs and

there they were millions of them how

during the face of the earth having a

wonderful time swimming about going for

picnics having a marvelous time and then

after a few million years

I'm a bit bored with the germs being so

small couldn't see them from his not be

stayin and sorry invented the

human being and in a poor old German I'd

to start flying out people's nostril to

in all our the face I don't like doing

it one fit well I'll make pressing throw

in the air in fact they're in your sock

sir call me only alibi mr. Ripley he sat

on a germ written radiator and he

contracted Polaroid's

eight seconds I quit working to say it's

the worst time but you know whatever you

say about disease it is a wonderful

thing because if it wasn't for disease

and suffering and all the garcy tornados

and things are happening like that

ordinary life wouldn't be happy you

wouldn't enjoy yourself when you're

having a good time I didn't have this

age to fair and look back on there are

throwing up all of this age I feel like

you know all five my lotta something in

this book like when did you have it oh

when I was free play on any thought you

know an awesome neophyte my face was all

blue

I could hardly breathe yeah I'm 19 now

what was strong

and dr. Armstrong creepy night you know

what's wrong I'm dead I never knew what

this fault and it's finally a great

surgeon found the solution to it what

was of course of it the cause of the

disease with my father holding the

underwater for 10 minutes about this

technological miracle when reaching out

into the unknown in interspace with

lonely probes a common cold was cured a

few years back by mr. Wainwright mr.

Wainwright of Houston invented a cure

for the common cold he came across it in

some food jelly a telephone card or the

other so he wrote out to boots about it

during that same night - burly men come

from the British handkerchief

Association and I found him two million

pounds in use notes and it's often never

harm us now with some lon floozy I dare

say yeah my dear you know there are some

wonderful cures about I mean I was

always certain reading in the Bible the

other day

so I need got this wonderful system of

aquaculture now it's a puncture the

science the science of the pin and what

a wonderful science a Chinese for

example if you've got toothache in China

you wring out the Chinese doctor all he

comes round with is a little pin that's

all he has in a black bag you see now

you said sorry you've got Tuesday takes

out this pin and with uncanny Chinese

precision dad he bangs it right into

your number regions well our region is

technical medical word for the pain in

your jaw

hi

[Music]

su1c1de note oh right now yeah so psych

wrong

[Music]

so now the whole human body then he

gives a pin to the patient and so sky

out and stick it in out of people

you guys I'm still getting out of people

okay good now when you see them jump up

in the air you stop thinking about your

own disease and you start enjoying other

people the face medicine like that my

dear we have some wonderful folks

outside huh I should know my mom is a

part-time gets it she is a Roman is she

yeah but she wasn't built in a day no no

see

you're like the talking bill in a

dioxide body like when all just a bit

ear right when I was a mere suckling and

[Music]

his cows came a teeny bit under my

pillow and tie my ear to the door with a

bit of string and slam the door very

hard did this sub alternative treatments

up on the ear I ain't nearly tipped all

my year oh well the angle fell off sadly

you are useless that no I do they

are they hard to complaints and diseases

in the world all in the mind you know

that's where they have their origins

that in the human mind that's where it

all begins

psycho pathetic things come up yeah and

in your sebaceous glands over food

starts moving it's all in a mine just

tell yourself oh I've not got a cold and

you won't have a cold

really yeah oh yeah good I'll sneeze

kayne no you didn't sneeze you thought

you sneaked though you thought you say

it again didn't you yeah yeah well be

terrified over to catch your mind test

your reaction

[Applause]
Post Reply