Sex Weather (2018)

[bunniefuu]

(GENTLE MUSIC)

(GLASS SHATTERING)

(GENTLE MUSIC)

(MOVING TO SOFT RHYTHMIC MUSIC)

♪ Turn it ♪

♪ Turn it down ♪

♪ It ♪

♪ Turn it down ♪

♪ Turn it ♪

♪ Turn it down ♪

♪ Turn now now ♪

♪ Turn it down ♪

♪ Turn it ♪

♪ Turn it down ♪

♪ Turn now now ♪

(SYDNEY SIGHS)

Yeah, yeah,
I had a lot of fun.

I mean, I drank too much.

Well, yeah, I hadn't seen
anybody for a really long time,

you know, so it was a
lot of hi, how are you,

what have you been up
to, blah, blah, blah.

Yeah, I kind of remembered
people, I don't know.

I'm talking quietly
because I'm really hungover

and loud sounds hurt my head.

Oh, come on, you've got three
hours on me.

This hardly seems fair.

No, no, I gotta, I gotta go.

I'm sorry, I need more sleep,
okay?

Yeah, yeah, I'll talk
to you later, mmm hmm.

(GENTLE MUSIC)

I love you too.

Bye.

(GROANS)

(DARREL SIGHS)

(WATER SPLASHING)

A medical drama, right.

What is this?

Yeah.

(TOY LAUGHING)

(COMICAL MUSIC)

Hey, checking the time.

You got an early flight?

Ah, you know,
I got a little time.

(SIGHS) But, you know,
yeah, we can,

I can head out if you're busy.

I just, I have a long
sh**t tonight,

- you know, so I should
- Yeah, yeah.

- probably go back to sleep.
- No problem.

(SIGHS)

I'm sorry, I can't find
my phone.

Did you leave it in the Lyft?

No.

I don't think so.

SYDNEY: Are you sure?

DARREL: Can you
call it please?

Can you call it please, Syd?

Will you hand me my phone?

What's your number?

Oh never mind, I got it.

It goes straight to voicemail.

Yeah, I might've left it in
the car.

Did I call it or did you?

I did.

Can you check, please, see if I
left it?

The faster you help
me find this,

the faster I can get outta here.

You're fine.

Thank you.

Okay.

DARREL: What?

We have to wait for
him to get back to us.

Uh, should I wait upstairs?

Could I wait down here?

I'm going to sleep.

I have to work tonight.

You can stay if you want.

You didn't have a good time
last night?

No, no, I had expectations,
I guess.

(GENTLE MUSIC)

DARREL: Well, so did I.

Did I somehow not meet them?

When we worked together,
you were, you know,

much more pleasant.

(CHUCKLES)

We were flirting and you
didn't really know me back then

and you definitely don't
know me now.

That's fair, I don't know you.

So, tell me something, anything,

about you (CHUCKLES).

Like what?

Like where you're from.

I told you where I'm from.

Ask me something better.

(CHUCKLES) All right,
how 'bout

(CLEARS THROAT)

what is the most
interesting place

that you've ever had sex,
like in public or something?

In front of people?

Yeah, or like, you know, like
the woods.

Well, all the working girls
have had sex in the woods.

It's like a coming of
age thing here.

Oh, that's so primitive.

(BOTH LAUGHING)

Hey, you know, since we're
stuck here, you know,

figured I'd just throw
this out there.

I know I could've been,
you know,

a little more generous
last night, you know.

Yeah.

So, how do you want me to?

What?

You know, want me to
take care of you.

You know, lick the cat, paint
the wall, unpack the box.

Oh, my God!

What, shut the f*ck up.

Oh, but I don't get second
chances now?

SYDNEY: No.

(DARREL SIGHS)

- Lick the cat?
- I'm sorry.

What are you even...

I just, I didn't think
you'd actually be offended

- by that.
- I'm making coffee,

do you want some?

Sure.

(SIGHS) You're a guy.

I resent statements like that.

Like what?

To assume that I'm just
driven uncontrollably by sex.

I bet you think that every
dude who talks to you

is hitting on you, even
when he says simple sh*t

like good morning.

No, but I do think many
guys under most circumstances

would have sex with most women.

And you think we
can help that.

Yeah, I think you can.

(SIGHS) Let's drop that.

I've got a question for you.

In your movie,

Yeah.

why did you decide
on the ending?

How do you mean?

Well, life isn't like that.

I don't think that there's
just one special person

out there for us.

Yeah, it's a nice
thought, though, isn't it?

I don't think it is such
a nice thought really.

I mean there's so many
people in the universe.

It's sad to think that we each
can connect

with only one.

So you didn't like the movie.

SYDNEY: No, I told you I did.

And you weren't just
telling me what you thought

I wanted to hear?

Wow, I didn't know you
were so insecure.

And you're not.

Mmm, no, my mom raised me
to be a little too confident.

And your dad?

SYDNEY: He didn't raise me.

Yep (LAUGHS).

- Don't...
- All the signs

- are there, Sydney.
- Not all girls

who come from broken homes
have daddy issues, okay?

Well yes, come on
that's not what I meant.

Uh look, I'm gonna have to
chalk this phone up to a loss

if they don't get
back to you soon.

Still nothing.

Why do you look so upset?

I'm all right.

Right, well, I'm sorry.

I just had a really big crush
on you

when we were sh**ting
and I was just hoping

it would be, you know?

All right.

No, what was so bad about it?

You, uh, jammed your d*ck in
my mouth

until you got hard and then
you couldn't keep it up

long enough to have sex.

Wow, well, thank you for
holding back.

I'm sorry.

Mmm hmm, and you farted in
your sleep.

I did that while I was awake.

Don't laugh.

That's not funny.

I apologize for being
a human being.

You snore and you
grind your teeth.

Well, I don't wear my mouth
guard when men sleep over.

Sydney, I'm a good lover.

Wouldn't know it.

So I used to be, huh?

Oh God, ugh.

What?

(SIGHS) Stop saying lover!

And stop being so serious,
all right?

Nobody's gonna wanna f*ck the
sad guy.

Good talk, Sydney.

Dude, where are you going?

DARREL: Upstairs.

Well, what about your phone?

Look if you're gonna stay
then yes, I want you to.

To what?

To take care of me.

(CHUCKLES)

(GENTLE MUSIC)

You know you're f*cking crazy,
right?

SYDNEY: Mmm hmm.

Are you a Gemini?

SYDNEY: No.

DARREL: There we go.

(SYDNEY SIGHS)

Don't laugh at me.

I'm always laughing at you.

Stop laughing at me.

Well, stop being goofy.

I can't.

DARREL: Mmm.

SYDNEY: Mmm.

Hmm.

DARREL: Hmm?

SYDNEY: Mmm.

Uh oh.

- Uh.
- Oh well.

Yeah.

Sorry.

Don't apologize.

Yeah, I'm not really sorry.

I know.

Rule number one in my bed,

you have to be honest.

Brutally honest, even.

Mmm hmm.

(DARREL CHUCKLES)

(GENTLE MUSIC)

I'm clean, by the way.

Good.

Are you?

You'll find out in two weeks.

See, that's not funny.

You know, shouldn't we have
had this conversation before?

DARREL: Yes, I usually
do, but you know, last night

was kind of spontaneous,
I guess.

Hmm.

Well, in my book if
you don't ask,

then you deserve to
worry a little.

That's so evil.

What is wrong with you?

(CHUCKLES) When was the
last time you were tested?

(MUMBLES) It's been awhile.

But it's fine 'cause
you know, everybody else

I've been sleeping with
gets tested regularly

so we're good.

Well, that's f*cking stupid.

Syd, relax, I'm playing,
I'm fine.

I don't have anything.

All right, I don't, you know,

I don't even have
sex very often.

SYDNEY: When was
the last time?

DARREL: It's been months.

You need to have
sex more often.

Oh, okay, well I'll sign
up for it, just check it out.

No, seriously.

Like I remember how wound
up you used to be, you know.

You were always so intense.

I guess, you know, like to
think I'm kinda funny, too.

Mmm.

When?

Syd, I say funny things all
the time.

You wore glasses when
we worked together.

Is that all you remember?

I don't know.

I remember, uh, you were
a hard worker.

Yeah.

Oh, I remember that you used
to walk around the set barefoot

all the time.

And that you had a toe ring.

And that you had
pretty cute feet.

(CHUCKLES)

Why, you have a foot thing?
(GENTLE MUSIC)

(BOTH LAUGHING)

You do.

DARREL: Oh, it's
embarrassing.

No, it's okay.

DARREL: Oh, this is
embarrassing.

Do you wanna touch mine?

DARREL: Oh my God, Syd, stop.

- Syd, what is wrong with you?
- Oh you do.

Ba bum, bum, bum.

DARREL: Syd.

You can kiss 'em if you want.

Nobody ever lets me do this.

SYDNEY: Well, why not?

(PHONE BLEEPS)

I don't know.

Guess I don't go around telling
people that I like feet.

I feel so silly (GIGGLES).

Why?

Why didn't we ever
do this before?

We didn't know we could.

Do they smell?

- Mmmm (LAUGHS).
- Oh!

No, come here, I don't mind.

- No, I do.
- I don't mind 'em.

SYDNEY: Uh.

(PHONE BLEEPS)

Oh.

Not the car?

Nope.

You're popular today.

I have to go to work soon-ish.

Already?

Wanna hear something honest?

SYDNEY: Yeah.

I thought about you
a lot over the years.

SYDNEY: What did you think?

I don't know, what
you were doing,

what your life was like.

I work in reality TV now.

Reality.

Well, I don't like scripted.

DARREL: Sydney.

I like writing.

I just don't like scripted.

We had no budget, no time,
no time.

And we made a great
film with $3,000.

No, no, no,
you belong in scripted.

We need to work together again,
too.

- Huh!
- Yeah.

Reality is just so...

SYDNEY: Reality is not
what's wrong with America.

I wasn't gonna say that.

I'm getting out of it anyway.

TV?

Film, everything.

I'm kinda done.

Why?

Because I work all the time

and I don't have benefits.

You know, it just, I'm
realizing I don't wanna do this

for the rest of my life.

So you're really not passionate
about this anymore, huh?

I didn't say that.

And passion doesn't go away.

It just, it moves
around a little

and you just have
to find it again.

Can I ask you a question?

SYDNEY: Yeah.

And, you know, just
I'm gonna throw this out,

I might sound like a
16-year-old girl

and I'm okay with that
(CHUCKLES),

did you unfriend me on Facebook
after the movie wrapped?

SYDNEY: Oh sh*t.

Ah, mmm, nope I noticed.

'Cuz I looked for you
specifically

and all I could see was
your profile picture.

(SIGHS) Are you gonna
ask me why?

The wrap party?

I knew you had a crush
on me and I obviously

had a crush on you.

But I knew you
were with someone.

So when we kissed,
everything got

a little too real for me.

You know, just one second
I went away to get beers

and I came back
and you were gone.

Sorry.

Nah, that's okay.

I guess it's funny now,
ha ha ha ha ha.

Yeah, it never woulda worked
out anyway.

You know, workplace
romance and all.

Yeah, totally unprofessional
(CHUCKLES).

Mmm hmm.

Are you seeing someone
right now?

Uh.

I just, you know,
got out of a thing.

I guess it's a break up.

How 'bout you?

Any recent break ups?

Not really.

This is the honesty bed,
isn't it?

SYDNEY: Mmm hmm, yeah.

(DARREL CHUCKLES)

(GENTLE MUSIC)

DARREL: Do you like me,
Sydney?

Don't take advantage
of rule number one, okay?

Okay.

And also does this
work for you?

Telling everybody everything,
every emotional current

that runs through your
mind just blah.

I think people need to
say what's on their mind.

Huh.

Sydney, it doesn't
bother you that we're just

wandering around on a
blue ball floating

in the middle of the universe

and nobody is talking about it?

That sh*t is crazy.

(LAUGHS) Right?

Like here we are sitting
in a bed together,

not doing anything about it.

Nope.

But I know that I want to be
in this bed

with you all day.

This will probably never
happen again.

You don't know that.

Mmm, this is how we are.

You know, we find these
tiny little grooves,

we make these connections.

And then we meet someone else.

We just bounce around
meeting people, some good,

some bad, some weird.

Until we find another groove
and make another connection.

But some, some of these moments,

these connections,
these grooves,

they need to be longer

so that we can remember

them clearer, better.

You're real deep, huh?

All right, stop.

No, I, I don't know
if there's serendipity

or poetry in everything,
you know.

I just think things happen the
way they do

and not always the way
they're supposed to.

I know that I want to
be here with you, here,

as long as I possibly can.

But we smell like alcohol
and my vag*na.

And my breath is awful.

- It is.
- Ugh.

That's very true.

That is not a lie at all.

See.

My breath is bad too.

I don't even have a toothbrush

and it's a first world
problem but it's a problem.

I mean, we should
definitely stay in touch.

(LAUGHS)

Don't look at me like that.

(SIGHS) Uh.

I wanna kiss you.

Are you trying to get
sex from me before you go?

Sit down over there.

You're perfect.

(BOTH BREATHING HEAVILY)

(SYDNEY MOANS)

Let's come at the same time.

Can I come on your face?

No.

Sorry.

(BOTH BREATHING HEAVILY)

I'm getting close.

(DARREL MOANING)

(SYDNEY SIGHS)

You want a towel.

No, it's okay.

Come here.

(GENTLE MUSIC)

If we're gonna stay in
bed all day,

I've got another rule.

DARREL: What's that?

Rule number two, you can't
wear pants.

I'm not wearing pants,
so deal.

Rule number three, no leaving
the bed.

♪ Turn it down ♪

Shake on it.

♪ Turn it down ♪

(SYDNEY GIGGLES)

♪ Turn it down ♪

♪ Now now ♪

♪ Turn it down ♪

♪ Turn it ♪

♪ Turn it down ♪

♪ Now now ♪

(UPBEAT MUSIC)

(TRAIN WHISTLE TOOTING)

(TRAIN BELL RINGING)

(TRAIN WHISTLE TOOTING)

(BOTH LAUGHING)

DARREL: Oh, mine
looks like a paper labia.

Can you show me again?

SYDNEY: You're so close.

Come on, you already,
you just gotta...

DARREL: No, just
gotta flip it under then.

Okay, what did you do?

I don't know.

Oh, no, it's really close.

Just fold that under.

Okay.

- That's the head.
- Yeah.

Mmm hmm, you're close,
you're close.

- Keep going.
- Well, I think,

I think you kinda...

- I don't understand.
- Just fold it.

Does the director really need

a thousand of these
just because?

He said he wanted a
thousand folded paper cranes

behind the talking head of
this interview just because.

Why do you have to it?

You all don't have PAs?

Yeah, but everybody bailed.

I'm only doing a hundred.

Yes, 'cause a
thousand is overkill.

Hold on, hold on.

I mean, the wings are low,
but, but, but.

- You finished one!
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

- I did!
- Yes!

- Okay that was weird action.
- I don't know why.

Throw it, throw it.

- Yay!
- Woo!

Boom, all right,
do another one.

I'm gonna, oh, okay,

I think I'm gonna hit
that after intermission.

(BOTH LAUGHING)

You like living here?

Yeah, I do actually.

DARREL: Where would you live,
you know,

if you didn't live in Portland?

(SIGHS) New Orleans,

- Atlanta, New York.
- Yuck.

Los Angeles,
it's where it's at.

Just shake the overcast.

No, I don't really mind it,

but I do like the beach
and the sun, don't you?

Mmm, I don't need it.

Mmm, I do need food, though.

Oh, we should eat something.

We made a pact to not leave
the bed.

But I'm hungry.

Yeah, you're right,
you're right.

Ba food.

Yeah.

Ah.

(CHUCKLES) Floor clause.

Floor clause.

DARREL: Yep, second it so we
can pass.

- You pass, all right, cool.
- I second the floor clause.

DARREL: You're damn
right you do.

Oh, what are you doing?

DARREL: You second
that f*cking floor clause.

- That's right.
- Oh no.

Oh God, don't, don't do that.

Sit there and be the wind.

I saw this in a movie once.

What are you doing?

Genius.

I'm a f*cking genius.

What the f*ck amazing

- is what I'm being.
- Oh my God.

Please don't hurt yourself.

I'm not gonna hurt myself.

Oh, God, here we go.

That's right, take it all in,
sweetheart,

- take it all in.
- Oh my God!

(BOTH LAUGHING)

DARREL: They should make
this sh*t an Olympic event.

- Oh, don't hurt yourself.
- Ah, here we go.

SYDNEY: There's a step.

DARREL: Yeah, I see, I see
the step

in your split level studio.

(LAUGHS)

Whose idea was that?

It makes it look it bigger.

DARREL: Because that
makes a lot of f*cking sense.

Here we go.

I have kale chips.

f*ck gonna do with kale chips?

Did you ever f*cking
go grocery shopping?

No, I actually don't.

You've got tangerines and a
Keurig so

that's where we are.
(SYDNEY LAUGHS)

Uh, how's grits sound?

SYDNEY: Grits.

- I like grits.
- Great, 'cause

that's the only thing
in your kitchen.

Grits are delicious.

Yeah, apparently so
are kale chips.

And that's just weird.
(SYDNEY LAUGHS)

Okay.

I gotta say, I really like
this view.

You got a dirty bowl,
come clean out your sink.

(SYDNEY LAUGHS)
My back.

Oh, man.

I need to take a picture of you.

DARREL: You don't need
to take a picture honestly.

Just asked you.

Oh, oh.

Not the first time
you've seen an ass before.

Oh, I wish it was just
the ass I was seeing.

DARREL: I'm winded,
that's for damn sure.

You see that damn much.
(SYDNEY GIGGLES)

SYDNEY: Well, you're
working pretty hard.

DARREL: I'm working
pretty hard.

SYDNEY: Okay, well, it should
be good.

DARREL: It should be good.

Fine, I'm gonna take it out.

If they're lukewarm grits I
don't wanna hear sh*t about it.

You're gonna burn something
and it's

- not gonna be pleasant.
- Not gonna burn something.

It'll be all right.

You know how much it costs
to get a six-foot black dude

with grits delivered to
your bed?

What the f*ck?

SYDNEY: Probably in the
thousands.

Why do you have so
many rugs in your house?

I thank you for your help.

You wanna get you
a couple chairs

and come over here and help me.

No, all right, no.

- That's fine.
- No, I think I'm good.

- No, it's cool
- I don't like

- what you're doing.
- It's cool.

- I'm gonna stay over here.
- Your bra's still on it.

What's the nearest hospital

in case I actually
do almost die?

I don't know.

- All right, well...
- It's 911.

It's all the same number.

All right, well you
dial 'cause you're white.

(SYDNEY LAUGHS)

- I'm fine.
- Oh!

DARREL: Can you not,
show a little confidence.

- Okay.
- You're low

and I'm not falling
off a f*cking building.

- You're good.
- Don't be so dramatic.

- Can I, can I help you?
- Stop these things.

Oh, now you wanna help.

I just crawled across your
floor with butt ass naked

on a chair and now you wanna
help me.

This is why we can't have nice
things.

- Be careful.
- You ready?

- Yeah.
- You be careful now.

I'm back now, move, so you can
see, move.

Ready?

Oh yeah, uh!

(SYDNEY LAUGHS)

Yep, like a graceful
f*cking swan.

- Wow!
- That was impressive, right?

That was amazing.

You're g*dd*mn right it was.

That was one of the coolest
things I think I've ever seen

in my life.

DARREL: Oh, that's
'cause you live in Portland.

(BOTH LAUGHING)

You know you need to stop
being so rude about Portland.

- I know.
- Portland is actually

pretty awesome.

I see, I see.

Hold on I'm gonna
fix your pillows

- like Martha f*cking Stewart.
- Thank you.

(SYDNEY LAUGHS)

Okay.

SYDNEY: Mmm.

It's so good.

I make movies.

I can tell when you're lying.

(SYDNEY LAUGHS)

- Mmm, it's good.
- Yeah.

It's like instant regret.

(SYDNEY LAUGHS)
Yep.

We'll put that over there.

DARREL: Come here.

Great kiss.

Mmm, that's (CHUCKLES)...

I never thought this
would happen.

And yet here we are.

(BOTH SIGH)

You know, we hardly
know each other.

DARREL: I don't feel that.

No?

Well, I did push back
work for you.

DARREL: You did.

Well, you didn't have to, I
thank you.

Yeah, they'll call me when
they need me.

Hey, you think we would've
been friends

like in school?

SYDNEY: You're way too nice.

I'm not that nice
once you get to know me.

SYDNEY: You're too sensitive.

Too sensitive?

Okay.

I just hung out
with bitchy girls

and we made fun of people.

Yeah.

I don't know if you and
I would've been friends.

You know, I went through phases
and stuff,

like a rebellious phase.

Hmm, rebellious how?

I'd sneak out and smoke pot.

Oh!

(GIGGLES) Oh, nothing
wildly original.

But my dad had a camera
and I'd go on long walks

and make movies.

Studied at NYU, right?

That is intimidating (LAUGHS).

SYDNEY: Well you didn't
go to Tisch

and you turned out fine.

DARREL: Mmm.

You know, I think you're
more confident

than you think you are.

Thanks?

(BOTH CHUCKLE)

Your parents, are they
still together?

Oh, yeah.

There are no divorces
in the Graham family.

SYDNEY: Yeah, but should
there be?

They annoy the f*ck out of
each other,

but they stay together.

It's a lost art.

Do you want that?

I want to not go on so many
first dates.

You know, I get tired of
giving the same information

about myself to
different people.

Gets old.

Yeah.

Yeah, I don't, I don't really
think people

wanna settle down
anymore though, you know.

There's too may options.

Hmm, enough to keep
you busy for a lifetime.

A lifetime of swiping
left and right.

I don't think people know
how to be happy anymore.

Well, are you happy?

I don't know.

I don't think so.

Well, why not?

You can't just ask someone
why they're not happy, Sydney.

(CHUCKLES) You know, it's,

it's a variety of factors.

SYDNEY: Mmm.

Well, name one.

(CHUCKLES) Just one?

(CHUCKLES)

For starters.

For starters, um,
I don't think

I'm where I'm supposed to
be at this age in my life.

But I'm here and you then you
know, you can't turn around.

There's no turning back.

Really too late to start over.

You know those where do
you see yourself

in 15 to 20 years
projects they make you do

in middle school?

Yeah, that sh*t's a set up.

(BOTH LAUGHING)

Yeah.

That's just something
for you to look back on

be like damn I was overzealous.

(BOTH LAUGHING)

Why am I even explaining
this to you?

I think you know that
I won't judge you.

You won't will you?

Mmm nnn.

I'm sad a lot.

Me too.

(GENTLE MUSIC)

Hey, you know, I love
how creative you are.

I do.

You just, you go out there
and you do what you do.

You know, I don't have that.

I'm not doing that.

I envy that about you.

I love how direct you are.

How you can communicate,
I mean, and effectively.

You know, everything you feel,

everything you wanna say,
you know.

Some people spend a
lifetime not knowing

what they want to say or how
they feel about anything.

How many movies have you made?

Three.

I think you're
doing just fine.

What makes you happy?

Hmm.

Days like this with
people like you.

You know, your face looks young.

DARREL: Mmm hmm.

But your hands are
old-looking, like old man hands.

Thank you for that.

I appreciate it.
(SYDNEY LAUGHS)

You know what's weird?

One day, we're gonna be dead.

Oh God, Sydney, move.

- No, seriously.
- Move.

Don't you think about that?

Like, like I could just die
right now.

Sydney!

Really?
(SYDNEY LAUGHS)

Seriously, that's where we are?

Stop saying words.

Have you ever thought
about your funeral?

No.

How would you like to die?

And don't say in your sleep.

And remember this is
the honesty bed.

I would go to the
nearest interstate

and find an overpass

or to the 30th,
to the 35th floor

of a downtown office building

because anything
over 35 is overkill.

And I would jump.

And I would do it early
morning, mid-morning,

or early afternoon around
that time when it's

you know, really busy

and everybody's trying
to get somewhere.

That sends a message.

That guy is, he's got
something to say.

You know.

And it's right there for the
world to see.

You've really thought
about that.

I've thought
about it recently.

Well, why were you
thinking about that recently?

It's a lot sometimes, Sydney.

You know, sometimes, (SIGHS)
sometimes it's too much.

(SIGHS) I wouldn't,

I wouldn't go through with it,
though.

My family wouldn't survive.

The world would miss you.

You know you, you have
this innocent quality,

people wanna take care of you.

(SIGHS) I took a bunch
of pills once.

DARREL: When?

SYDNEY: A long time ago.

Why, Sydney?

I was stupid, okay?

And life is scary.

I didn't know how to handle it.

It's, I don't understand
what made you do that.

You really wanna know?

It was a guy.

(GENTLE MUSIC)

Have you ever wanted
somebody so bad

that it consumed
your whole life?

On one of the biggest
nights of my life

all I could think about
was a guy,

a guy who didn't even
love me back.

(CHUCKLES)

Oh (SIGHS).

And I prayed.

I don't even believe in God.

It didn't work.

You know.

(SIGHS)

You don't always walk
out of a relationship

having learned something.

Hmm, I'm fine now.

But those feelings, they
wouldn't go away.

There was no art in it.

There's nothing to
extract from it.

It was just a f*cking waste.

Hmm.

I think part of being alive

is wishing you were dead.

I didn't tell you this so
you would feel sorry for me.

I know.

(PHONE BLEEPING)

Oh, phone.

Oh.

Hey, this time it is the car.

He found your phone.

Oh, yeah.

Well, thank God, huh?

SYDNEY: Yeah.

What time is your flight?

Around six.

Let me check.

Want my phone?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Uh.

You'll make it in
plenty of time.

He'll be here soon enough.

Yeah.

I mean, you'll have
to leave soon though.

Guess I should finish packing
my stuff and get ready, huh?

Or we could, uh, you know,
we could go somewhere.

Where?

I mean (CHUCKLES), I don't
know where.

Where uh, do,
would you wanna go?

(SIGHS) I don't know.

I don't know.

Uh, hey, can I ask
you a question?

Yeah.

Who is that in the picture
with you?

That's Matt, my husband.

Thought so.

Wait, we're separated.

What, when did you
ever get married?

A year and a half ago.

- Oh!
- All right, it was fast.

No sh*t!

Well, what are you doing?

Hot lava!

What?

It might not work out.

If you've already decided
that it might not work out,

then why do you

- even sit there...
- I don't know,

I don't know, okay?

I can't, I can't answer that.

I just, don't leave.

I still...

Look, I actually don't think
that there are any accidents.

That's stupid, Sydney.

Accidents literally happen
all the time.

Planes crash, ships sink,
cars crash...

Coincidences, I know
there are lots of accidents.

I'm, I don't think that
there are any coincidences.

You were supposed to
be in my bed

even if it was just for today.

Matt and I have been unhealthy
for a really long time.

We've done some messed
up sh*t to each other.

We're unhappy.

(GENTLE MUSIC)

We tried to do the open
relationship thing

because of my schedule and
that didn't really work.

Where would you wanna go?

You said, let's go somewhere.

Where would you wanna go?

On a trip?

Yeah.

I forgot we were even talking
about it.

Come on.

Hmm?

If you wanna go, I'll go.

I don't even...

Come on.

I don't even know where...

- We could...
- Where, where

do you wanna go?

We could go to Los Angeles.

(LAUGHS)

Come on, we could.

We could go to the observatory.

We could go to the beach.

We could start a
production company.

Oh, wow, you're talking about,
I mean.

You know, we could,
we could make movies.

- We could figure it out.
- We could operate...

You know, I've been writing.

I've been writing too, so.

Let's go!

Seriously, let's just go.

What, what is holding us back?

- Come on.
- So you wanna go to LA

and you would just wanna pitch
sh*t to companies all day?

I don't know.

Yeah, whoever'll listen
(CHUCKLES).

DARREL: Yes?

Yeah.

DARREL: Yeah.

Yeah.

(DARREL LAUGHS)

Now, this is, are you serious?

Don't f*ck with my, Sydney.

I'll get outta here
and I'm leaving

and I'm not coming back.

I'm not f*cking with you.

I'm, let's go.

I'm serious, let's go.

I mean, f*ck, I uh...

See.

No, well I'm in the
middle of this sh**t.

I can't just leave, you know.

Word gets around, I'm
never gonna work again.

Aren't you getting out
of the business anyway?

Yes, yes you are.

So we're gonna do it.

Yeah.

So let's go, give me,
I need to, I gotta cancel

and cancel to that (LAUGHS)...

Are we really doing this?

We're doing it,
we're doing it.

I'm gonna get us flights now.

Um, okay.

Ah!

Okay, put this down,

- we can do that later.
- Yeah, I can, okay.

Okay.

(GENTLE MUSIC)

Okay.

Oh.

Oh, f*ck.

Okay.

What's happening?

What's up?

(GRUNTS)

Yep, yep.

DARREL: Can we do that?

SYDNEY: I'm doing it.

I have to pee so bad.

I had to climb
on the furniture.

SYDNEY: Yeah well, you
did not have to do that.

Mmm.

(SYDNEY GRUNTING)

(DARREL CHUCKLES)

Oh, yes!

Oh.

Hey, do you want some food?

You know, like some actual food?

I was serious when I said

we were supposed to
stay in the bed.

SYDNEY: Yeah, I know,
but we could get delivery.

Mmm, all right.

SYDNEY: Okay.

Oh.

Is Thai okay?

Mmm, yeah, that's fine
as long as it's pad thai

- or red curry, that's it.
- Okay.

I can't believe you did this
with chairs.

Uh!

(GIGGLES)

I can't believe you
did that with pillows.

SYDNEY: Oh, man.

Did that almost as
gracefully as you.

The jump's not easy, is it?

(GIGGLES) That was kinda fun.

DARREL: Yeah.

Pad thai, red curry.

Hey, that's a workout.

DARREL: Yeah, now you're
winded.

See how it feels?

(SYDNEY LAUGHS)

Hello.

(DARREL CHUCKLES)

Yes.

Hi, can I order
something for delivery?

I would like pad thai and
red curry with chicken.

Is chicken okay?

Why 'cause I'm black?

SYDNEY: And brown rice.

You too good for
white rice now?

(CHUCKLES) Yes, I am at

3405 Southeast Ankeny.

Card.

Thank you.

'Cuz I'm black.

You had to go there.

You didn't have to
get brown rice.

I did, I like brown rice.
(DARREL LAUGHS)

I bet.

(BOTH LAUGHING)

Hey.

DARREL: Yes.

You had a movie
come out yesterday.

I did.

You did.

Have any reviews come out?

I don't know,
I don't read reviews.

Why?

Mmm nnn.

SYDNEY: Hmm, okay.

What are ya, what are you
doing there?

I'm lookin'.

Sydney.

I don't wanna hear it.

SYDNEY: Okay.

What if it's good.

DARREL: (chuckles)
Yeah, for some reason

I only read the bad ones.

Hmm.

Okay.

DARREL: Mmm.

SYDNEY: Mmm.

What?

Nothing.

What, I thought you said
you didn't wanna read 'em.

What that reaction, yeah,
I wanna know.

Okay.

(CLEARS THROAT)

While budgetary limitations
were no doubt a factor,

there's so little attempt
at being cinematic

that we get a rare sequence
actually driven by visuals

rather than dialogue.

There can be a fine line

between deliberately
minimalist style

and simple lack of technical
expertise or imagination,

a problem the film

- struggles with throughout.
- Okay.

Thanks.

I'm sorry.

It's okay (SIGHS).

Well, look, you can't take

these things to heart, you know.

And they can't all be bad.

I'm gonna find another one here.

(SIGHS)

Okay, okay, here we go.

DARREL: Mmm hmm.

Mmm (SIGHS).

Never mind.

Really?

Come on!

(LAUGHS)

Oh!

This is why I don't read 'em.

You know, if they

knew what I went through
to make it,

they'd understand, right?

They don't care.

(PILLOW CLATTERING)

(DARREL HUFFS)

Who was it about?

The movie.

It was about somebody,
wasn't it?

I think it was.

It was inspired by
a lot of people.

SYDNEY: But mostly...

Yeah.

SYDNEY: Do you think she'll
see it?

Oh God.

Personally I'd be flattered

if somebody made a
movie about me.

Really?

Yeah, I mean, you
know, it wouldn't make me

fall in love with
them or anything,

but it'd be a cool story
to tell my friends.

God.

Stop, thank you.

I don't know, man, I really
liked her, loved, probably.

I saw the end
before the beginning

and I ruined it.

Are you, look, I'm sorry.

- I didn't mean for you...
- No, I, 'cause

this is different.

This is, this is kinda cool.

You know, I mean, you gotta
try a little bit, though.

You know, women like
to be pursued.

Well, so do I, right?

I'm a sensitive guy, you know.

I cry a lot.

Yeah, that's 'cause
you're a little bitch.

Oh, you.

You're gonna die
alone and miserable

and probably just leaving 17
cats behind.

Oh yeah, why is that?

Because you're a
workaholic like I am.

Hmm.

And you're in
a failed marriage.

You don't know anything
about my relationship.

(SIGHS)

DARREL: Sorry.

Yeah, well.

It's not untrue.

God, only in love, Syd.

Only in love

do we actively decide

to work

in direct opposition
of good judgment

and self-care.

That is crazy and I do not
understand it.

And that's, that is why
I write love stories

'cause I am hoping that
I find a way

to just figure this sh*t out.

(SYDNEY SIGHS)

You know, I'm sure if she
sees your movie she'll love it.

You still love her, don't you?

No.

No, um, I would not be
here in this bed with you

if I did.

I'm completely over it.

SYDNEY: You really
believe that?

Yeah, yeah.

There's no pressure.

You can be in my
bed having loved

or still loving someone else.

It's fine.

I could love you, though.

Don't say that.

It's the truth, Sydney.

And don't think I'm crazy for
saying it.

You mean, you could love me
one day

or that you may already?

I might already love you

and maybe I always did.

SYDNEY: Don't throw out
the word love like nothing.

- Like every day...
- When I say it I mean it.

Well, maybe you
just like saying it.

Maybe it feels good to say.

What are you doing up there?

(SIGHS) I'm stretching
my legs.

(GRUNTS)

Don't hit your head.

(HEAD THUDS)

Oh (GASPS).

No, it's fine.

(CHUCKLES) What did I
just say.

I heard, I just

- didn't listen.
- I just said.

No, I got you.

All right.

All right.

(GENTLE MUSIC)

Could you love me, Sydney?

Like love me.

I don't know how to
answer that.

It's simple.

You just say how you feel.

Okay.

Um, I feel I could,

I don't know, I don't know.

(SIGHS) I haven't had a
lot of good relationships.

And me either.

I mean Matt, you know, he's...

What is...

What's he like?

He is (SIGHS) tall.

He's vain.

He's closed off.

And he always has dirt
under his fingernails.

I don't know how that happens.

Um, he dreams big

and he works hard.

And he bottles things up.

But he's a good man.

What does he do?

He's a home equity
loan manager.

Okay (LAUGHS).

(LAUGHS) He's not boring.

He's funny, he's really funny.

And I like that.

It's complicated.

You know, you're with someone
for so long

and you just lose sight of...

(SIGHS) I was about to
finalize the divorce,

but he wants to make it work.

How 'bout you?

We don't talk, you know,
I mean, not like this.

This is intimate.

And his family, they're
pulling for us

and my mom is and it's hard.

You know, I mean, it's years of
my life

that I've spent
with this person.

Well, about a year's my limit.

I could do a year with you.

(PHONE RINGING)

Mmm.

Oh, oh, oh.

Oh, hello.

Yes, just come on down, mmm hmm.

Okay.

Bye.

Totally forgot about the food.

Ah!

All right.

♪ Where oh where is underwear ♪

Uh, are we breaking rule
number three?

SYDNEY: No.

Okay, 'cause I think
the f*ck not.

SYDNEY: Here.

Who the f*ck
has a back scratcher?

SYDNEY: Me.

You got orthopedic shoes too,
Grandma?

Yep.

(LIGHT KNOCKING)

Yeah, come in.

DARREL: Jesus, hold on,
Sydney, damn.

(LIGHT KNOCKING)

SYDNEY: Yep, come on in.

(MAN MUMBLES)

DARREL: Hello, can I
get some sheet, Sydney?

Damn!

(SYDNEY LAUGHS)

Hello?

Would you take some?

I thought you were
gonna put your pants on.

- Well, I need you to do...
- One second.

Got my ass and this m*therf*cker
about to, all right.

Come on in.

DELIVERY MAN: I'm not
really allowed

to walk in your home.

It's company policy.

Well, could you just
throw the food down here?

DELIVERY MAN: When you
pay for it.

All right, incoming.

(CARD CLATTERING)

Come on.

You know, it's fine (MUMBLES).

DARREL: Hey.

DELIVERY MAN: Right.

Hello.

Sorry, but...

Thank you.

DARREL: Sorry this is
so weird.

SYDNEY: Thank you.

Tip?

Yeah, sure, 15,

20, 30% is

yeah, 30% because you, yeah.

You know, actually, I do
need you to sign it, too.

(SIGHS) Couldn't you
just forge it or something?

You know what, I'm
just gonna come in there.

SYDNEY: Okay, thank you.

Okay.

Is there like a rat
or did your pet snake

get loose or something?

No.

No, it's um, hot lava.

What?

DARREL: Nothing, nothing.

(SYDNEY LAUGHS)

SYDNEY: Forget it, it's fine.

Okay.

- Oh God!
- Hold, you're on it!

I'm playing.

(BOTH LAUGHING)

That's funny.

I'm so sorry.

I'm really sorry.

DARREL: Oh, petty days
are here.

Oh man, we've just,
it's been a long day.

No, seriously, thanks
for playing along, bro.

There's your card.

Thank you.

And if I could just
have you sign right here.

Look at that, huh?

Good bye paper receipts.

Look at this.

We got me signing
a whole tablet.

Oh, technology's amazing.

♪ The future is now ♪

♪ The future is now ♪

Watch some movies, watch some

- whatever he's watching.
- Just give it back to him.

- I'm sorry.
- I'm so sorry.

- I apologize.
- Thank you so much.

I like technology, man.

I'm a fan, bro.

DELIVERY MAN: It's okay.

SYDNEY: Really appreciate it.

Have fun.

SYDNEY AND DARREL: Thank you.

Enjoy whatever it is
you're doing.

All right, bro.

Okay.

See you all right.

Hey thanks for playing along,
bro.

- You're a really good sport.
- Yeah.

Ah.

(GENTLE MUSIC)

♪ I'm a-gettin' to have
(MUMBLES) ♪

What were your past
relationships like?

Some were good,
some were bad ones.

SYDNEY: Well, did you
love them?

Did you love them,
did you love 'em all?

I think I did what I do
when I spend time with people.

I give them everything I can.

What made any of 'em special?

Mmm, the fact that we were

in the same place, right?

We wanted to be in
the same place,

connecting with each...

(CHUCKLES) I don't know.

I'm sorry.

What?

You're not tired of me yet?

Oh, no, no, no.

I wanna eat you.

I wanna make a vest
out of your hair

and drink your blood and
wear your skin as a dress.

Jack hammer me, Darrel,
jack hammer me.

It's just so much.

I'm not even sure what happened
to them.

(BOTH LAUGHING)

- Okay, all right.
- No, no, no.

Okay.

Did you ever jack
hammer what's her name?

What is her name?

(GROANS) Sarah.

Yeah, I think I did (LAUGHS).

You know it's best to
work up to the jack hammer.

You don't wanna
lead off with it.

Mmm, okay, well, the last
time we actually had sex

it was bad, drunk sex.

Mmm, that seems to be a
reoccurring thing with you.

Ever go with threesome?

Yes.

SYDNEY: Two guys
or two girls?

Both.

SYDNEY: Nice.

What about you?

Anything that three or
four people can do together

I've pretty much done.

I mean, I got a strap-on
in my drawer down there.

Three different sized dildos
depending what you're into.

If you wanted to
give that a sh*t.

Light purple
and then dark purple

and then my big one is green.

Vibrating butt plug, cock rings.

What the f*ck?

SYDNEY: Flavored lube.

What are you doing?

I basically don't even need

to watch p*rn anymore, you know.

(COUGHS) Anyway.

(DARREL CHUCKLES)

So you're not watching
p*rn anymore at all, huh?

SYDNEY: No, I don't need to
watch p*rn.

I've got enough right up here.

(BOTH CHUCKLE)

I have something honest to say.

(SIGHS)

I came to see you, that's
why I went to the premiere.

Yeah, well, I wasn't gonna go.

(LAUGHS)

To your own premiere?

But the only reason
I went is 'cause

I thought you might be there.

I'd fantasize about you.

I'd be with Matt and I
would think about you.

I seem to think you like me.

I'm so attracted to you.

When I'm around you, I,

all the cells in my
body wake up.

I mean, they're aware, you know.

My body loves your body.

I fantasized about us
being right here like this.

And I,

well, meeting your family

and your friends.

And buying a house, getting
married, retirement,

who would die first, all of it.

(SYDNEY CHUCKLES)

Is that weird for me to say?

No, no, it's not weird.

I did it too.

I think the minute I really
start to like somebody

I kind of imagine my whole
life with them, you know.

I wonder if your mom
would like me.

Are you serious?

She'd love you.

(BOTH LAUGHING)

Do you think you can
love more than one person

at the same time?

Yes.

SYDNEY: Do you love her?

No.

How do you know?

What do you think our life
would be like together?

Really?

Psst, I think it'd be something,
yeah.

We both finally, you know, be
together,

doing what we love to do.

Just haven't had the
chance to do what you want.

I think (SIGHS) I think
if we were together,

I'd hurt you.

Maybe.

Or maybe I'd hurt you.

Yeah.

I have a lot of baggage.

I'm cold sometimes.

(CHUCKLES) Yeah,
I know (LAUGHS).

Sometimes I lie.

But, you know,
I'm not right now.

I'd know if you did.

(GENTLE MUSIC)

Hmm, I like this song.

♪ Turn it ♪

♪ Turn it down ♪

I love you right now.

♪ Eh eh ♪

♪ Turn it down ♪

I love you too.

♪ Turn it down ♪

♪ Turn it ♪

♪ Turn it down ♪

♪ Turn it ♪

Are you really gonna
leave him?

♪ Turn now ♪

Yeah.

(PHONE BLEEPING)

Oh.

The driver will be here
in 30 minutes.

Okay, I guess...

(SYDNEY CHUCKLES)

♪ You know it ♪

♪ Turn it down ♪

♪ You know it ♪

♪ Turn it ♪

♪ You know it ♪

♪ Turn it down ♪

♪ Turn you know it ♪

♪ Turn it ♪

(SYDNEY GRUNTS)

DARREL: Okay, what you need
soap here.

SYDNEY: Yes.

Come on.

You've got the urge and use all
of that.

Okay, ah!

Gimme some.

DARREL: Do that back, aw.

(GENTLE MUSIC)

Oh, oh!

(SYDNEY GIGGLES)

Yours probably
got it right here.

(SYDNEY LAUGHS)

We gotta go to Redondo Beach.

Why?

SYDNEY: To visit my
friends Alisa and Kevin.

Do we like Alisa and Kevin?

SYDNEY: Oh, we love them.

All right, if you love 'em I
love 'em.

You know, I was gonna
go to karaoke.

You know.

SYDNEY: Yeah, Alisa
would totally be down,

but Kevin we may
need to get drunk,

(PHONE DINGS)

but I'm totally fine with that.

DARREL: Hmm, be cool.

Long as we stop by in and out.

Hey, did you
remember to get your,

your lady products?

Uh, yeah, yeah, I packed 'em.

DARREL: Did you tell
'em that we need a ride

to the airport?

Yeah.

All right, cool.

So I don't have to wait
another 15 minutes for another.

You all right?

Yeah.
(PHONE BLEEPS)

DARREL: All right, cool.

This is him.

He's here.

- He's here?
- Yep.

DARREL: Want me go meet him?

Uh, it'll be great.

- Babe, come on, come on.
- Yeah, okay.

- Let's go.
- Okay, I'm coming.

Gotta get a ticket, you gotta
do stuff.

We're movin', we're movin'.

We're making movies
that are amazing.

Okay.

- All right.
- Okay.

We gotta go.

Yep.

Come on.

SYDNEY: Okay, I will.

- Hey there.
- How you doing?

Are you Darrel?

- Yes, sir.
- Great.

DARREL: Thank you.

I tried to give it a
little charge for you.

Thank you so much.

DRIVER: You guys seemed like

you were having a
good time last night.

Well, you know, you gotta
live it up while you can, right?

DRIVER: Yeah.

(SIGHS)

Go, go.

Oh, hmm, how was it?

And I told her, you know,

maybe you should go
ahead and start packing.

"No, no, no, I've got it,"
she said.

It's all good, though.

(SYDNEY SIGHS)

(GENTLE MUSIC)
(RAIN PATTERING)

I'm gonna go check
on her real quick.

DRIVER: Sure.

DARREL: I'll be right back.

DRIVER: Okay.

Hey, come on.

I can't go.

All right, well,
that's all right.

We can stay here.

Just let me go
cancel real quick.

You can't do that either.

I'm so sorry.

I thought I could.

I really thought I could.

I'm moving to the east coast,
back home

when this production wraps.

We're gonna try again.

You're not going to be
happy with him.

You're not going to be
happy with him, Sydney.

You can't, you can't even talk
to him.

You can't talk to your husband.

No, no, no, no, no.

No, it's, no, look.

Look, the car...

You didn't cancel your flight.

No, no.

sh*t, this is not what
friends do to each other.

(GENTLE MUSIC)

(SCOFFS)

(SIGHS) We can't be friends,
Darrel,

I mean, can we?

Why?

Because I could love you.

(SIGHS)

Oh, this was a huge mistake.

When we were in bed today,
you were thinking about her.

Admit it.

And I was thinking about him.

She emailed you.

DARREL: Hmm?

You logged into your email on
my phone.

She said she loved your film.

I just saw the first sentence.

I didn't read the whole thing.

(SYDNEY SNIFFLES)

Are you gonna make a
movie about this?

(SNIFFLES)

(SAD MUSIC)

(BIRDS CHIRPING)

(RAIN PATTERING)

DRIVER: Everything all right?

We can um, we can
go to the airport.

DRIVER: Okay.

Hey.

Yeah, I know it's late.

I just wanted to get you
before you fell asleep.

Listen, when I get home,

there's some stuff we need to
talk about.

And I want us to be completely
honest with each other, okay?

I love you, too.

Night.

(LIVELY MUSIC)

♪ I can't hear you ♪

♪ On the phone tonight ♪

♪ Maybe it's the distance ♪

♪ It's breaking up the line ♪

♪ When I'm not near you ♪

♪ I lose the old insight ♪

♪ That you give me ♪

♪ So I'm on the phone tonight ♪

♪ It makes no difference ♪

♪ To a satellite ♪

♪ But there's a distance ♪

♪ Here along for the ride ♪

♪ My voice is a traveler ♪

♪ My heart is full of wires ♪

♪ And I feel the connection ♪

♪ To that distant light ♪

♪ In the corner of the sky ♪

♪ Aw yeah ♪

♪ I can't hear you ♪

♪ On the phone tonight ♪

♪ Maybe it's the distance ♪