02x08 - Urban Ed/Stop, Look and Ed

[bunniefuu]

[Whistling]

Mm-hmm! [Giggling]

Checkmate!

Boy, plank, you sure
have lost your finish.

That's home plate
and here's the banana!

Banana?

Run, jonny, run!

Um, ok. Where to?

Hit the bull's-eye, jonny!

Squeeze the banana
and hit the bull's-eye!

Do it! Hurry! Hit it, hit it!

Ha! What are you waiting for?

Here's the peas and
here's the straw!

Come on, jonny! Get a lead out!

sh**t the balloons!
sh**t the balloons!

Don't look at me!
sh**t the balloons!

[Pow pow]

Jonny: oh, boy!

Don't drop the marshmallows!

Quit looking at me!
Hurry, jonny, move it!

What do I do, eddy?

Feed double d!

Feed him, jonny! Hurry!

Oh!

Eddy: that-a-boy, jonny!

Whoo hoo hoo!

Touch home plate!
Touch it, touch it!

I see it, eddy!

Eddy: go! Run! Hurry!

Ed/edd/eddy: run, jonny, run!

Oh... Touch it! Touch it!

Hurry, jonny! Touch home plate!

Go, jonny, go!

Huh? What are you looking at?

You're almost there, jonny!

Oh! Look at jonny crawl!

Touch it! I did it!

Quick! Put a quarter
in the jar, jonny!

Hurry, jonny, hurry!

Put the quarter in the jar!

Just drop it in, jonny!

Drop it in!

Nice try, eddy!

Rrr!

I helped, too, jonny!

I was the balloon guy!

Perhaps we should
design a game for rolf.

What's the use?

Look at him hanging
laundry... Boring!

And kevin's fixing
his bike... Snoresville!

Nazz is lounging and the
twerps are playing blocks!

Did I mention nazz lounging?

What a gaggle of sad sacks!

It's the curse of
suburban living, eddy.

We're just too distant from the
hustle and bustle of the big city.

I love the city!

If you can make it there,
you can make it anywhere!

Let's not forget the
potpourri of urban culture...

Museums, theater, and
my favorite... Libraries!

Oh! And when you bump into cars,

They go, "whoo whoo! Bah! Bah!"

Ha ha! You can make
big bucks in the big city!

Let's drive to the city, fellas!

We're too young to drive, ed.

My dad has a shovel!

Well, I say if we
can't go to the city,

Let's bring the city
to the cul-de-sac.

I suppose I should
find some tape.

Not to mention a duck!

Rolf: ah!

The merciless
b*ating with a stick

Has cleansed mama's
pantaloons. Fresh!

[Machinery buzzing]

What is this that fouls
the calm of the cul-de-sac?

Hey, rolf!

Your dad shearing sheep again?

Keep it down!

This sound is a mystery to rolf,

As is your mockery of
my father's leisurely life.

Hey!

Keep it down or
I'm calling the cops!

How are we supposed to
play with all this racket?!

I think it's coming
from the lane.

Kevin: I bet those eds
are up to something!

Awesome!

Nazz: we've got our own city!

Ja, ja!

Hoo-rah!

The dorks did
something cool for once!

Everything's so big and tall!

Let's stroll down the
boulevard of dreams.

Jonny: no, wait!

Don't go in there!

Rolf: look!

The city's a bad place!

The city's scary and smelly!

It's true! Ask plank!

City people ignore you.

They're too busy and
walk right past you,

Without even so
much as a "howdy do."

[Laughter] huh? Guys?

Jonny: did you hear what I said?

Hey!

Boy, plank, ever feel
like you might as well

Be talking to a piece of wood?

Plank?

Not you, too!

Jimmy: I'm tingly all over!

Sarah: I've never
been to the city!

Good day, mrs. Lady.

Hello, mr. Fancy pants.

Greetings, city stranger.

They're cardboard,
rolf. Get a grip.

Sarah: go!

Rolf: hmm. What
barbarian would hang.

The milk box from a string?

Jeez, rolf! That's
a traffic signal.

[Horn honks]

Come on! I ain't
gettin' any younger!

Move it!

Eddy! If you blow that
horn one more time...

[Loud honk]

What the... Get back here, dork!

[Coughing] the city air is
thick like nana's toenail.

Where'd everybody go?

Wait till I find that dork!

Ed: beep beep! Whoa, whoa!

I'm a truck! -!

Bearing on your crumpet thing.

They're just trying to bug me,

And it worked!

[Growling]

You cut me off, double dweeb!

I beg to differ, kevin.

My safety bag would not have
deployed if you hadn't rear-ended me.

I cannot see past ed
boy's swollen back!

Eddy: what is this... A funeral?

Let's go, grandma!

Stay calm. Ignore
the peanut gallery.

[Ding]

Don't stop. Yes, go! Look out!

This guy's a hoot.

Can you see my hand signal?

Because I'm about
to make a turn.

That's it! Stand back, folks!

Ehh!

Road rash! Ha ha ha!

Ed: smokey's on my tail!

[Engine roaring, siren blaring]

Plank! Oh, plank!

Where are you, buddy?

Ed: hey, jonny boy!
What's the matter?

Looking for something?

Plank ran off, eddy!

He's all alone in this
cardboard jungle!

Seen him?

Hmm. Plank, plank, plank.

A-about this tall, smiles a lot?

You saw him?

I can't seem to remember.

How's about refreshing
my memory, huh?

Did you see him or not?!

Nope. Haven't
seen him. Beats me.

Plank! Oh, plank!

How's a guy supposed
to make a living?

Bright lights and
skyscrapers! Whee!

Pinch me, sarah! I'm dreaming!

Sarah?

Eh... Pardon me.

Have you seen my friend sarah?

[Laughter] sir?

Too many people!

I feel so congested!

Oh, look... A shoe store.

♪ La da da da da...
Oh! Here we go!

Shine your shoes, citizen?

W-what?

Foot, please.

Yeah, yeah, fine.

We certainly have been
having some fine weather,

Haven't we, sir?

Enough small talk.
What's the damage?

The customer's always right.

All done. That will be cents.

Um, kevin, you seem to
have given me a bottle cap.

Life in the big
city, pal. Ha ha!

Kevin seems to have
adapted quite well.

[Nazz humming]

May I help you with those?

Coo coo coo coo!

Oink oink!

Pigeons don't go "oink," ed!

I'm a gazelle! Oink!

Nazz, wait!

Hey, you!

Oh, my!

What do you think
you're... Look out!

[Laughing]

Coo coo!

Quack quack!

Ed! You're going
to hurt somebody!

This ain't a cartoon!

Double d, let go!

[Both grunting]

Get off! Hai-yaah!

Curse my chivalrous ways.

♪ Come out, come out,
wherever you are ♪

[Squish]

For crying out loud!

[Engine roaring] huh? Plank!

My buddy! Huh?

Plank! Look what
the city's done to you!

[Horn honks] plank!

Sarah: line-ups
and more line-ups!

What's with all the line-ups?

That's what you do
in the big city, sarah.

Oh, my... Jimmy?

I got a tattoo, sarah!

Is that what this line is for?

Only cents at
ed's tattoo parlur.

[Kevin groaning]

Get on with it, dork!

Cry me a river... Sarah: hey!

You butted in line, rolf!

Get lost!

Hee!

Have mercy, rabbit ears!

Sarah's in trouble,
and needs the help

Of the boy with the
snake on his face!

Sssss!

Rolf: assistance, please!

Hunhh!

Security! Break it up, will you?

But, eddy, situations such as
these tend to work themselves...

Get out there! They're
scaring our customers!

Mama, save me. Run!

[Sarah grunts]

Edd: people, please! Control...

Jimmy, careful
of his hairy back!

Hold him for me!

[Punching, yelling]

Nazz: hi, jonny.

Oh, yeah? Well, what's plus ?

Hey, hey, hey!

Any of that crystal ball
stuff will cost you extra!

Eddy: hiya, jonny! Want a tat?

Your city's corrupted
the mind of my pal plank!

Jonny: surrender, urban fiend!

[Grunting, punching]

Eddy: help! I'm being mugged!

[Jonny laughing]

Did you see that?

That bald kid took my money!

Tell someone who cares!

Ed, do something!

Can I cater a party?

Rrrr!

[Grunting]

Sarah: what's he doing?

You better find my plank!

We'll need some time, jonny!

What? Jonny, wait!

Back off, eddy, or it's curtains

For your dirty money!

Don't even kid about
something like that!

Edd: hey, you, up there!

Yes, you... With the jar!

Someone wants to talk to you!

[Microphone feedback]

Plank, is that you?

See? Plank's ok!

Now, about that jar,
pal... Shush! What?

Really? Do you think I should?

Should what? What?

Ok, you brat, you!

Jonny, no!

My money!

Kevin: scrambles!

[Speaking indistinctly]

Nazz: cool! Money!

Hey, don't touch
that! Put it down!

Ooh!

[Eddy grunting]

[Laughter]

That's city property!

[Yelling indistinctly]

You're welcome.

Double d, tell me
you saved some!

Tell me we're ok!

Eddy! It was horrible, eddy!

Look what they did to my shirt!

Aahh!

Ok, lummox! Did
you get any coin?

Did you, huh?

Yeah, I got a bunch!

That-a-boy, ed!
Gimme, gimme, gimme!

A worm?!

Ironic, don't you think?

I was too fast for them, eddy!

My city!

Ed: dominoes! Let's do it again!

Here... Hold this.

Ed, I don't want it!

Double d! Get a net!

It's crawling!

Ha ha ha! You know, eddy,

Ceaseless toil and broken dreams
are the essence of urban living! Heh!

Jonny: ah! Take a
deep breath, plank!

You can smell peace,
love, and tranquility!

I missed you, too, buddy,

But if you ever do that
again, I'll glue you to a rock!

It's a joke, plank!

Ha ha ha ha...

[Boing]

[Chuckling]

Ed, please?

The vibration from the
rubber band could interfere

With the gyros of our
jawbreaker surveillance satellite!

I have no idea what
you just said, double d!

Can I wind it up now, please?

Can i, huh? Oh, come on!

Hang onto your neck, orville!

Double d, tell me
again! I'm drooling!

Well, eddy, with the proper
atmospheric conditions,

Our satellite will be able
to pinpoint every jawbreaker

Within a -block radius
of the cul-de-sac.

Really?

Ed: contact! Huh?

Oh, dear! Ed!

Let go of that propeller!

Roger, eddy!

Ed, no! Reverse that!

Grab hold of the propeller!

In your hat, double d!

Now what?

Aaahhh... Ed!

Ah! Look at it go, guys!

Edd: oh, dear! Oh, dear!

[Sighs]

Oh, well.

Just once, I'd like
something to go right.

[Honk]

Hello!

Lucky for us, I can track
its every whereabouts.

[Beeping]

Hmm!

Ha ha ha ha... Wait up!

Waffle!

Your turn, sarah.

Leapfrog!

You're so nimble, sarah.

My turn!

Of all the darn luck! Eh!

Space junk att*ck!

Darn! My perfectly
manicured nails!

Hey...

If my calculations are correct,

It should land... [Crash]

In that tree.

Damaged, fractured,
and out of order.

Smooth move, lumpy.

First one there is a rotten egg!

Edd: no, wait! Please, ed!

Send an impulse to
your brain and stop!

Oh!

Ed, are you standing on my
shirt with your filthy shoes?

Eddy: dogpile!

For pete's sake!

We're not allowed on the grass!

Who says?

Please read the sign.

"Keep off." So what?

Eddy, you must observe
and obey the sign.

Signs are in place so
that order is maintained

In an otherwise
uncultivated society.

And i, for one, uphold
these silkscreen policies!

Eddy: don't you know adults come
up with that stuff just to bug us?

See? I step on the grass
and nothing happens.

Have you no moral fiber?!

Be a rebel! Try it!

It's just a dumb sign!

I'm smarter than a sign!

Look at me! Ha ha ha!

Hello?

Go on! Touch it!

I can't! It's not in me, eddy!

Think of the melee and...

Excuse me, but has my
shirt become a doormat

For everyone's filthy shoes?

[Ed grunting]

Boing!

Well, I suppose,

Technically that's
not the grass ed: aahh!

[Coughing]

I'm a woodpecker...

'Cept with dirt.

[Grunting]

Let's find some more signs!

[Children groaning]

Plank says he's almost got it.

Rats!

That could have been us!

Good thing plank read the sign!

Eddy: if someone
told you to jump off.

The empire state
building, would you?

Edd: don't jump, eddy, don't!

Oh, you're so stubborn.

What are you doing, dork?

I'm following my rules, kev.

If you want the
ball, just get it!

Ha!

Oh, you're in big trouble, ed!

Ah! Rules are for losers!

I'm an angel, sarah!

Heh heh heh!

What a couple of screwballs!

Try to talk some
sense into them!

They're loose
cannons, ready to blow!

I'll give you to let go of me!

Let's have some
dessert before dinner

And eat it with our hands...

Then talk with your mouth full!

Eddy's the man!

Mom is going to be so mad, ed!

You kids still listen to
mommy and daddy? Too bad!

I guess you won't be joining
us for an after-dinner swim!

You can't do that, eddy!

We can do whatever
we want, jonny boy!

But you'll get a cramp.

That's exactly what
adults you to think.

Ok! This has gone far enough...

Can me and plank go to bed
without brushing our teeth?

Oh!

Let 'em rot, jonny boy!

Can I stay up late?

Can I wear shoulder pads?

Knock yourself out!

You're just trying to get
us in trouble, aren't you?

Help, help! Kevin's
b*ating me up!

Oh!

Is the fuzz on its way?

I think not.

Live by the rules,
just like double d.

But rules are a joy to uphold!

Dork alert!

Rules are for losers!

Ha ha ha ha!

Ed: what do I win?

A -finger sandwich, you big...

Coochie coochie coochie!

Quit it! [Laughing]

Eh! Come, wilfred.
We have much to do.

Eddy: hey, rolfie!

All work and no play
makes jack a dull boy!

Who is this jack?
I know no jack.

Don't listen to him, rolf!

Eddy only wishes to eviscerate

Social order as we know it!

Ed on a pig!

Ed! You can't do that!

Take a break, will you? Relax!

Wouldn't you rather be sloshing
around in some wet cement?

Why do you hinder rolf's
drudgery, -haired ed boy?

If my chores are not complete,

I will be banished
to the... Cupboard!

Who's going to know?

Come on! There's a clod
with your name on it.

[Laughter]

Ow!

Rolf is humbled by the cement.

It makes him yearn
for the life of leisure.

[Pig oinking]

Ha ha! What a pig!

Give it up for rolf, everybody!

[Cheering]

Well, it seems you've
convinced all but one, eddy,

That rules need not
apply in this cul-de-sac.

Well, mister, I remain an
anchored ship to those rules...

Terra firma, baby!

Hmm!

A penny for your thoughts?

Not good.

"No rules" rule, double d!

Ha ha ha ha... Arf!

[Oinking]

Edd: aaahhh! Eddy, stop!

What in the sam
hill are you doing?

I precisely alphabetized those
books for immediate reference!

Alphabets are for soup!

What's this... "Joys of rules"?

Man, get a life, double d!

No!

Ok, that's it!

I'm going to give
you such a thrashing!

Huh?

Jeez, louise!

Cool!

If you say one word to anyone,

I'll never speak to you again!

Ed: I am dead from the neck up.

I'll just save it and
use it for a*mo.

When I need to, double d.

Eddy's always a step ahead.

Ooh! Look at this thing!

Eddy, don't you
dare remove that!

Or what?

♪ I feel my hand
slipping [ripping]

No, eddy! You can't!

[Rrrrrrip]

Ha ha! I'm such a bad boy!

Edd: you've broken me, eddy.

Hmm?

Set me free, and I'll join you
in destroying everything.

That separates us
from the primates.

We're making progress!

Yum! Like cheese?

No, ed. "Progress,"
not... "Process!"

Put them down, ed!
You leave my ants alone!

[Gasps]

, Ants, ed!

Pick them up, pick them up!

Slow down, double d.

[Gagging] I'm sorry.

Edd: where do you
think you're going?

Get back in here!

,... Ooh!

[Crash]

[Chickens cackling]

[Oinking]

Hi, rolf!

Chickens!

How's it goin', stretch?

[Sighs]

No more chores for rolf.

I am a lazy good-for-nothing,

Just like the others.

Ha ha ha ha...

Say good-bye to dirty dishes!

Ha ha ha ha!

Kevin: awesome, hey, nazz?

[Loud burp]

Good onion.

"No rules" rule!

[Giggles]

Feel the wind, plank!

Sarah: vanilla, chocolate fudge!

And german sorbet!

Meet you at the bottom!

[Slurping]

[Giggling]

Jimmy: wheee!

I love ice cream! Yummy!

Isn't this cool, ed?

We can do whatever we want!

Let's fly!

Edd: attention, please.

Uh, your attention, please!

Why is double d wearing
pantyhose on his head?

I have good news for us all.

I have taken the liberty of
phoning all your parents!

Kevin: what?! Oh, man!

You didn't!

You're bluffing!

No, really!

They're on their
way home right now.

No thank-yous are necessary.

Eddy: he flipped!

Am I in trouble now?

Rolf: aahh! Home,
wilfred, quickly!

Scoop faster, jimmy!

My tummy hurts.

Get off!

I can't find my clothes!

Edd: no need to panic,

As order will soon
be restored... Whoop!

We have to do what
grown-ups tell us to again!

Kevin: double dork!

You broke the number-one rule...

Don't squeal!

Rolf: wilfred is a
very quiet pig, kevin.

Hold it, rolf!

Give me a hand here.

Yes! The closet can wait!

I've got goose bumps!

Um, see? Double d just
broke a rule like us, guys.

No, I didn't. Uh...
He's delusional.

A-and the pantyhose
is too tight.

His brain is squished.

Kevin: I think it's time
for a little order.

Ja, ja!

[Children laughing]

I can't believe you told on us!

I apologize. I... I'm not
sure what came over me.

The... The flagrant
disregard for rules

Must have caused me to
go, uh, temporarily insane.

Somebody's coming!

Hey, over here!

[Whistles]

Yoo hoo! Up here!

Ed: just a squirt?

Rolf: you crazy?
Can't you read?!

Signs are meant to be read!

There's jonny!

Hey, up here!

Help us out!

Be a rebel! Come on!

Ed, edd n eddy!