07x14 - Bringer of Light

[bunniefuu]

Look, there's another one.

That's the third falling star
we've seen in one night.

You do know, don't you, baby?

- That's not a star.
- No, I know.

It's a chunk of space
rock that burns up

as it enters the
Earth's atmosphere.

Look, that's not a star
either, that smudgy one.

- That's the Andromeda Galaxy.
- Oh, I see.

Tess, did you know

that the Andromeda
Galaxy consists

of perhaps half
a trillion stars,

but because it's
so far away from us,

it looks like just one?

Where did you learn all of that?

Andrew taught me.

The Andromeda Galaxy

consists of perhaps
half a trillion stars,

but because it's
so far away from us,

it looks like just one.

Look at all that
wonderful light,

just crying out, "Look
what God has done."

Some people do see...

some people don't see,

and some people try to see,

but the darkness
just... gets in the way.

That doesn't look
like math homework.

Oh, hi. Sorry.

I was just taking a break
to look at the stars, but...

it's too bright outside.

I used to love to
watch the stars.

When I was your
age, I used to sit

with my grandma
on summer nights,

and we'd make up
our own constellations.

Lurkey the Turkey,
Joanna Banana...

I wonder if
Joanna's out tonight.

No, none of 'em are out tonight.

Just the moon.

Mom...

did you know that the moon
was exactly what we needed?

What do you mean?

Well, Dad was
saying how it's unusual

for a planet to just
have one big moon,

but that's exactly what we got.

I mean, if it were much
smaller or closer to the Earth

or if we didn't even have one,

we probably
wouldn't even be here.

It just makes you wonder
how it all got started, you know?

I told you about that already.

It's just luck.

In a universe of five
billion trillion stars,

the odds are one planet's
gonna get everything right, right?

Dad, it's bad enough having
to listen to you teach at school.

I really don't feel like
listening to this at home, okay?

Who said you listened at all?

That is so unfair.

Hey, hey, truce.

You guys... Look, I'm tired.

Good night. I love you.

Good night.

Don't stay up too late.

Did you see that?

A child asks a question.

She wants to
understand the music

that the stars make in her soul.

She's trying to find the answer

to the longing and
wonder she feels,

and then somebody just
casually sh**t her question down.

And a little girl's faith dies

before it can be born.

It happens every day,

but it cannot happen this time.

She's got to find enough
faith for a whole family.

♪ When you walk ♪

♪ Down the road ♪

♪ Heavy burden ♪

♪ Heavy load ♪

♪ I will rise ♪

♪ And I will walk with you ♪

♪ I'll walk with you ♪

♪ Till the sun
don't even shine ♪

♪ Walk with you ♪

♪ Every time, I tell you ♪

♪ I'll walk with you ♪

♪ Walk with you ♪

♪ Believe me, I'll
walk with you. ♪

-Mornin'. -Mornin'.

Lucinda Marie, you
are not wearing that.

- Why not?
- Because you're 15

and your stomach is
showing, that's why.

You've got a million other tops

that go all the way
down to your pants.

Maybe a sweater
would help, honey.

Maybe a snowmobile suit.

Is that, like, a joke?

Lucy, just go change, okay?

At least she listens to you.

- With me, it's always a fight.
- She's just

at that age.

Yeah, when does she
finally get to the age

where she realizes that her
father's right about everything?

Mm, that was five.

You missed it.

Oh, great.

- Aw.
- Mm.

Thank you.

- What time's your appointment?
- 2:30.

Much better.

You ready? I got to get in

and finish grading
those geology tests.

- Oh, did you grade mine yet?
- No special privileges

just because I'm your father.

You're tellin' me.

That's Monica.

She's my new English teacher.

She lets you call her "Monica"?

Sorry.

I haven't left you much
room to get out there.

It's fine. I'll make it.

Maybe it's just God's way
of telling me to go on a diet.

Maybe it's His way of telling
me I should learn how to park.

- Hiya, Lucy. -Hi.
- I'm just kidding.

I don't really believe
in God. John Baker.

Monica. I do.

You did an excellent
job on your English quiz.

Oh, really? You finished
grading them already?

No, I haven't, but I graded
yours and, between you and me,

you got an "A."

Some of you

did very well on
the geology test.

Some of you did not.

So much for rocks.

Today we begin to
study astronomy...

The sun, the moon,

the Earth, the planets, the
comets that circle the sun

out beyond the orbits
of Neptune and Pluto,

somewhere out by the orbit of
young Danny's ego over here.

So I've asked Andrew
to join us today.

Andrew is from the Hansen
Planetarium, and he's here

to help us get started.
Welcome, Andrew.

- They're all yours.
- Thank you. Thanks.

Uh, okay.

So, can anybody tell me

how big the Milky Way Galaxy is?

Anyone?

Okay, well, to give you an idea

of how big it is,

if you're going
the speed of light,

which is a 186,000
miles per second,

it'll take you this long
to get to the moon.

And if you keep
going that same speed

for the next 90,000 years,

then you just might reach
the edge of our galaxy,

and that's just the beginning.

It doesn't stop there because
there are more than 100 billion

other galaxies in our universe.

How are you feeling?

Oh, I'm a little tired, but...

then again, I have
a teenager at home.

There you go.

I'll tell the doctor
you're here.

Thanks.

Okay, that's it.

Um, come by the planetarium
any time and see me,

and, uh, we got a great new
show, so come check it out.

Oh, one more
reminder, too, people.

Your research topics
are due tomorrow!

Andrew, really
appreciate you coming by.

- Any time.
- Lucy.

You can do better
than a C-minus.

What happened? I
thought you studied.

I did.

I guess rocks just
don't thrill me too much.

Look, you've got to
bring your grade up.

You're sitting on a "C" average,

but you're not that
far away from a "D,"

and I'm sorry, but I can't
help you just because...

I know.

No special privileges.

See ya.

"When I heard the
learn'd astronomer,

"When the proofs,
the figures were ranged

"in columns before me,

"When I was shown
the charts and diagrams,

"to add, divide
and measure them,

"How soon unaccountable
I became tired and sick,

"Till rising and gliding
out I wander'd off by myself

"In the mystical moist night
air, and from time to time,

Look'd up in perfect
silence at the stars."

So...

what do you think
Mr. Whitman was trying to say?

Mary.

Well, it's like he's
sick of knowing

all that stuff about the stars.

He just wants to remember
how cool they look.

That's exactly right, Mary.

Now, for your next essay,
I want you all to go outside

to look at the stars
and to write down

what you see and feel.

- Lucy.
- But you can't see the stars.

There's too much
light from the city.

Yes, that could
be a problem, huh?

Okay, let's see.

Here we go.

"To see a world
in a grain of sand

and a heaven in a wild flower."

We have wild flowers, don't we?

All right, everyone, the essay

is due Wednesday...
Any flower will do.

- Monica.
- Mm-hmm?

If I could find a way,
could I do the stars

instead of the wild flowers?

Of course.

Really? 'Cause...

I'm doing this research
paper for science,

and I was thinking
about doing something

about the stars
at the planetarium.

Ah, two reports, one
research trip... good thinking.

What's your research
paper on anyway?

Uh, I haven't decided yet.

I just like this whole
universe thing, you know?

Like, well, where
did it come from?

Was it just an
accident or... or what?

I mean, what started it all?

Or who?

Yeah, but that would be like
trying to prove there's a God,

and... that would
drive my dad crazy.

Yeah.

Thanks.

You're gonna what?!

I'm gonna prove
the existence of God.

Not in my class.

Why not?

I don't care if you get Einstein
to write your paper for you,

it's bad science.

Monica thought it
was a good idea.

Yeah, well, Monica is
not your science teacher.

You just don't like it
'cause I thought of it.

If somebody else had...

Mom?

What is it, Erica?

It's back.

What?

The cancer is back.

How could the cancer come back?

I thought they got rid of it.

With your mom's kind, it's
a little more complicated.

Yes, but... it'll be okay.

I'm just gonna have
to go back to chemo

and start over again.

Right.

And we'll get through it
just like we did last time.

We know how to handle it.

So, there's...

nothing to worry
about then, right?

Hey, I'm not worried.

We'll just keep on
keeping on, okay?

What were you two arguing
about when you came in?

She comes to me and
she actually proposes

to prove the existence of
God in her research paper.

Can you believe that?

She just wanted to
get your attention.

What makes her think she
can prove something like that?

She doesn't have to prove it.

She got your goat.

Mission accomplished.

Well, were you like
this when you were 15?

I was perfect.

We're gonna b*at this
thing again, you know.

I know.

Good morning, John.

Hey, clarify something
for me, will you?

Uh, Lucy told me
you encouraged her

to prove the existence of God

in her research
paper for my class.

Is that true?

I didn't discourage her.

Oh, really?

It sounded like a
lovely hypothesis

for a science project.

I consider your interference
with my students,

let alone my daughter,
highly unethical.

I'm sorry if this has
caused conflict, John,

but I believe in God,

and if someone asks
me if His existence

is worthy of discussion,
I have to agree.

Do me a favor

and keep your God to yourself.

Lucy has enough
problems right now

without you filling her head

with a bunch of fairy tales.

For a man that
doesn't believe in God,

he seems terribly
passionate about Him.

I noticed that.

But sometimes a man

can become so enlightened,

he keeps himself in the dark.

Science is science
and God is God

and never the twain
shall meet, huh?

Well, the twain did
meet in his life once.

Really?

Just once?

So far.

Okay, We read your proposals

and I'm very proud
of some of you.

The rest of you
will notice a big "no"

scrawled across your title page.

That means you're going to
need to choose a new topic.

So, Danny, we won't be

proving the theory of why
men can't do housework.

Very good.

As for the rest of you,

let's try and find a topic

that actually resembles
science, shall we?

So, first, I've got
my English paper,

or, how stars make
me feel or something.

All right, well, I can
provide a few stars for that.

And I was also hoping you
might be able to help me out

in my science project, too,

but my lame-o science teacher

totally sh*t down my idea

'cause it's not
scientific enough.

What was your topic?

To prove the existence of God.

Yeah, so, something easy.

All right, well...
how about this?

Have you ever heard of
the intelligent design theory?

No, no, but this is
sounding very good.

Good.

Hi, Erica.

How you been holding up?

I'm not exactly thrilled to
be going through this again,

but I have a lot of
faith in the medicine.

Well, statistics show

that people who have faith

get through this sort
of thing a little better.

But, uh, that's faith in God,

not faith in medicine.

Well... My family
doesn't believe in God.

But what about you?

I think about it sometimes,

but my husband's
a science teacher.

He has a problem with religion,

uh, so I just try
not to rock the boat.

But your husband's not the one

that's sitting in this
chair, is he, baby?

- Hey, Lucy.
- Hey.

Hey, you're not
gonna believe this.

You remember that
planetarium guy, Andrew?

- Yeah.
- Well, he totally showed me

a way to nail my research paper.

When you look up at the stars...

What's wrong?

Well, you know how I'm
doing my science paper

on how you can cure all
different kinds of cancer?

Yeah.

Well, what kind
does your mom have?

Ovarian.

Oh, God.

Lucy?

Do you know what
the survival rate is

for women who get
ovarian cancer twice?

It's practically zero.

The second time around

they don't even talk
about getting better.

They just talk about
how long until they die.

My mother is dying, Monica.

She's got

a-a year to live,
if she's lucky.

And then... she's gone.

I don't want to be without her.

She's not gonna be
there for graduation,

or... my wedding, or
when I have a baby.

She was always supposed
to be there for that stuff.

I love my dad,

but we're just too different.

It's Mom who...

How am I supposed
to live without my mom?

Your mother is still here, Lucy,

and she needs you
to be strong for her,

now more than ever.

I'm not strong.

Yes, you are.

You have so much to offer.

More than you even realize.

You know, you share a name

with a famous
literary character.

A very courageous woman
in the novel Don Quixote.

And the name Lucy
means "bringer of light."

Maybe that's what
you're meant to do

for your mother right
now, and your father, too.

Bring light?

I don't understand.

Well, things seem
pretty dark right now,

but what happens
when it gets darker?

The stars come out.

I thought we were
gonna get this thing fixed!

Where have you been?

I waited for you after school.

I was with Monica, okay?

No, not okay.

If you don't need a ride,

don't make me wait around

while you're goofing off.

I wasn't goofing off.

- Okay... - Guys... please stop.

Please.

When were you
gonna tell me the truth?

You know, Lucy,
your dad's scared, too.

Well, if he is, he...

he sure doesn't show it.

Sure he does.

He shows it by getting angry

at things he can't control,

like ovens and
teenage daughters.

Don't do this research
paper on God, Lucy,

just to hurt him.

He's hurting enough already.

Maybe it started
out that way, but...

but Mom, all of a sudden,

I really, really want to know

if there is a God or not.

Because if there isn't...

and you die...

all the science in the world

isn't gonna help
me see you again.

I don't know, sweetheart...

but I'll tell you one thing.

If there is a God,

this would be a
nice time to know.

Even Einstein's
theory of relativity

is not inconsistent at all

with the concept of eternity

and intelligent design.

So, you're saying that
all the coincidences

in the universe... aren't?

Okay.

Let's say that you are
out walking in a field,

and you happen to see this watch

sitting there on a tree stump.

Now, would you assume

that all the-the gears
and the-the wheels

and the little springs
just fell down from the sky

and landed there, perfectly
together, to make this watch?

Of course not.

I'd figure that somebody
had left it there.

Well, why wouldn't you assume
that it had always been there?

Because it couldn't
have always been there.

Why not?

Because it had to
come from somewhere,

like wherever they make watches.

So what you're saying is,

this watch had to be...

It had to be imagined,
um, it had to made,

and it had to be put on
that stump by someone.

Well, yeah.

You can't have a watch
unless somebody's made it.

And it didn't just jump
up on the tree stump.

Why not?

Out of all the gears
and the wheels

and the springs in the world,

the odds are that...

some of them had to
finally end up together

as a watch on a tree
stump accidentally.

Right?

Well, when you put it that way,

it's... it's a lot harder

to believe in coincidence

than it is to believe
in a watchmaker.

You never see the watchmaker,

but the evidence
that he was there

is right in your hand.

Dr. Cody to the pharmacy.

Dr. Cody to the
pharmacy, please.

Mom, I think I've done it.

What, sweetie?

Okay. "A number of
recent scientific discoveries

"can be used to support the
theory of intelligent design,

which suggests that
evidence exists to..."

Mom?

Oh, I'm sorry, sweetie.

I guess I'm having some
trouble focusing today.

Lucy, baby,

maybe we should do
this at a different time.

Well, but the paper's
due tomorrow.

Are you happy with it, honey?

Yeah. I mean, I put a
lot of science in here,

which Dad ought to
like, but... Good. Good.

Turn it in.

Anesthesiologist to Four West.

All right, see you later.

It should have been an F.

I gave you points for spelling.

But I proved it.

You proved nothing.

- You just don't listen.
- No!

You don't listen.

I told you no, but you just
pressed on to make me crazy.

No, I did this because
I wanted to know.

How do you know that
there isn't a God, Dad?

Did you ever do an experiment
to prove that He didn't exist?

Of course not.

Then how do you
know He isn't real?

Because I know...
Because I know, okay?

That's how I know.

I don't want to talk
about this anymore.

Fine. Be that way.

Why are you always
doing this, John?

You're always at
each other's throats.

What are you two
gonna do when I'm gone?

You can't just give up, Erica.

I'm not giving up.

I'm accepting it.

And I want to use
the time I have left

to help the two of
you accept it, too,

because if this
family falls apart,

if everything my life has
been about falls apart,

then I don't know
why I was here.

Erica... John,

you've got to let
her deal with this

in her own way, like
that paper she wrote.

But that's not science.

That's science fiction.

Some invisible guy in the
clouds with some wonderful plan

for hope and love
and peace on Earth.

Well, maybe that's just
what she needs right now.

Maybe that's what I need.

I think you're gonna be

very comfortable here, baby.

I'm sure I will.

And guess what?

They've got ten
different kinds of Jell-O.

I don't recommend the green
one because it's not actually lime...

It's just green... but the
other colors are just fine.

Thank you, Tess.

I'll remember that.

Well, I'll check on you later.

Okay.

Lucy?

We'll be back
right after school.

I love you.

- Me, too.
- Come on.

Lucy?

Hm?

Try not to be too
hard on your dad.

Okay. Bye.

Oh, and you know what?

I read your science report.

Really?

Did you like it? Did it
give you some hope?

I can tell you worked
really hard on it, honey,

and I'm so proud of you.

Lucy?

How are you today?

We took my mom to
the hospital this morning,

and I don't think
she's coming back out.

My dad was right.

I did deserve an F
on that stupid paper.

It didn't prove anything,

and it didn't give my
mom any light at all.

So now she's gonna die
not knowing if there's a God.

And you know what?

I don't know, either.

Just because you
can't see the light

doesn't mean it's not there.

Maybe something
just got in the way.

Maybe you gave your
mother the wrong report.

WOMAN ; Hospital
X-ray tech to ICU.

Hospital X-ray tech to ICU.

Where's my wife?

She left.

What?

We're almost there, Mom.

Where exactly are we going?

You'll see.

What do you mean, you
don't know where she went?

She's your patient.

I realize that, Mr. Baker,

but they didn't tell me
exactly where they were going.

Who are "they"?

Your daughter and Tess.

They said something about

taking Mrs. Baker
to go see the stars.

This look like a good
spot for you, baby?

Yeah, Tess. Thanks.

All right. Honk for
me if you need me.

Now what's all this about?

Mom, I know you didn't like
my science paper very much.

No, I thought it
was very well...

No. Let me finish.

I wrote two papers
at the planetarium.

I gave you the science paper

because it had all
the facts and figures,

and I thought all the evidence
made a really good case

for some sort of intelligent
design for the universe.

And whether Dad liked it or not,

those things I found
out really got me thinking,

and got me asking
questions of how we got here.

The truth is, all I
really care about now

is where we're going,

so I think I gave
you the wrong paper.

This is my English paper.

A-plus?

My goodness.

Anyway, when I wrote this,

I wasn't really
thinking about God.

I was just thinking
about the stars.

But I just read it again,

and all of a sudden, it
makes perfect sense.

The science paper
doesn't prove there's a God.

It just gives the evidence.

The proof... is in here.

"Looking at the stars,

"all of a sudden, I don't
care how many there are,

"or how far away they might be.

"All I think about, as
I look up at the sky,

is that they're so beautiful."

"And something
happens inside me.

"Something I can't explain.

"Something that feels very
real and somehow very old.

"As if what I'm feeling tonight,

"in the 21st century,
is the same thing

"people have been feeling

"for thousands and
thousands of years.

"Something that
makes us feel tiny,

"and yet, part of
something huge,

"all at the same time.

Something that makes
me feel... grateful."

Yes.

I used to feel that.

But Mom, don't you see? If...

If I felt grateful,

if something inside of
me had to say thank you,

then there must be somebody
out there to feel grateful to.

Somebody that people
have been feeling grateful to

for centuries, long
before we knew about...

about light years and
black holes and galaxies.

It's just... it's inside of us,

and I think everybody
feels it at least once.

Yeah... I did.

But...

I guess I just didn't
look long enough.

Well, that's why I
brought you here.

Look up, Mom.

He's there.

Hello?

Andrew?

Anybody here?

Andrew has left.

Oh, hi.

The planetarium is closed.

I'm the only one here.

Oh.

Have-have you seen
Lucy here with her mother?

No.

Are you sure?

- Yes.
- 'Cause

they-they left the hospital
to go look at the stars,

but this is the only place
around you can see them.

That's right.

Too many bright lights,

too much smog and haze,

too much in the way to even
know if the stars are real at all.

I don't... I don't know
where else they could be.

I don't know what
I'm supposed to do.

I don't, um...

I don't know what to do!

Lucy told me about your wife.

I-I walked into
that room tonight,

and it was empty, and...

You know, all of a sudden, I...

I knew what it was
gonna feel like after she's...

you know, after she's gone,

and-and I'm alone.

You won't be alone.

Lucy, you mean.

I-I'm already losing her.

She... she-she hates me,

and I-I-I don't know why.

And H can never seem
to find the right words.

I-I've... I've never been alone.

I-I just don't know
if I can bear it.

Is that true, John?

Isn't there a time
once, somewhere,

when you felt alone?

I don't know.

Yeah, um...

once, when I...
when I was a kid,

H... I got lost camping.

It got dark.

It was stupid.

And what happened?

Something told me to look up,

and I saw the
North Star, and, uh...

I just followed it, and I...

I found my way out.

Ah, something told you,

and you looked up,
and lo and behold,

somebody had
put a star in the sky.

Not-not exactly.

Quite exactly.

Exactly north.

That star has been leading
people home for a long time.

God is quite the
scientist, don't you think?

I told you, I don't
believe in God.

Then start.

What?

Just start.

Like every experiment
you've ever done,

behave as if God exists,

and then start looking for Him

as if you'll find Him.

Why would I even bother?

Because you keep saying
that you don't believe in God,

but you never say
that you don't want to,

and I think that you
do, especially now,

and I also think
that you're afraid.

You're afraid that
if you find evidence

of a... an intelligent
and loving God,

that will mean that all your
years of studying science

were for nothing, but that's
not going to happen, John.

As a matter of fact,
you've spent your life

discovering how
amazing the universe is,

and that's why you
can understand,

more than most people,
just how amazing God is.

If I just believe.

If I just start.

Yes.

You see, God promises

that if you take one step out
of the darkness into the light,

no matter how small the step,

the light will shine brighter.

So take a step, John,

just one step into the light,

and if God is not there,
you've lost nothing,

but if He is there,

you have gained everything.

Maybe...

but it still won't
save my family.

It already has.

One step?

One.

Okay.

God?

No. This is crazy.

No.

God?

This is me.

Are You there?

Yes.

Yes, He is,

and He wants you to know
how much He loves you.

You're an angel?

Yes.

Tell Him...

thank you.

You just did.

Monica?

Dad?

Shh.

I don't want you to wake her.

How did you know
where to find us?

Well, something just told me.

We came to look at the stars.

So did I.

I love you, kid.

I love you, too, Daddy.

You know that paper you wrote?

Yeah.

I'd like to read it again.

I think I may have missed
something the first time.

Really?

Oh, yeah.

Feels good, doesn't it, baby?

Yes, it does.

It's wonderful to
see them all together.

How long do they have, Andrew?

Forever.