05x14 - Escape Route

[bunniefuu]

A funny thing about people
is they always put their safe behind a Renoir.

So where's the Renoir?

Ah.

Can't be right every time.

Ah-ha.

Now there's a clue.

I thought so.

It has been said, on more occasions
than you and I have had eggs for breakfast,

that crime does not pay.

Well, I and this little safe here
are going to prove that it does pay.

And pay handsomely.

To the tune of £,.

Of course, when people are as
careless as this with their property,

it's ridiculously easy.

Oh, the pride of Scotland Yard.
Claude Eustace Teal.

After all these years,
I've caught you in the act.

The famous Simon Templar.

It's my duty to warn you that
anything you say may be taken down and used in evidence at your trial.

Well said, Inspector Teal.

Put that down.

Certainly. Anything to oblige.

By the way, purely for the record...

What?
Congratulations on a job well done.

Thank you.

So what comes next?

The cop shop? The bracelets, Ethel.

There's no need for them,
is there, Templar?

Anything you say, Claude.

On second thoughts,
you've quite a reputation.

You're probably right.

After all, this is the biggest day
of your life.

Frustrated years of patience
rewarded.

Get these off! Get these off of me!

Having trouble, gentlemen?

Let go of me! He's going!

Get after him!

Templar, come back!
Sorry, Inspector.

Templar!

Don't stand there blowing your
whistle! Come and help me!

What are you waiting for?
Get after him!

# Without you near me

# To hold me tight

# I need your kisses

# Here every night

# Never let it be said

# You wanted my mind

# Never let it be said

# That I was unkind

# I beg you, beg you to stay

# Oh no, don't walk away

# For I hope that you will always be

# My lover all eternity

# Without you near me

# To hold me tight

# I need your kisses

# Here every night

# Never let it be said

# You wanted my mind

# Never let it be said

# That I was unkind

# I beg you, beg you to stay

# Oh no, don't walk away

# For I hope that you will always be

# My lover all eternity

# I hope that you will always be

# My lover all eternity #

Nick.
Ready and waiting, Mr Templar.

Thank you, Nick.

There's £ for your trouble.

How long have I been here?

Since nine o'clock, Mr Templar.
Positively nine.

That's what I like about you, Nick.
You're so observant.

Maggie's enjoyed your company too.

Maggie, thank you for
a delightful evening.

It's been an evening to remember,
Simon, my darling.

It certainly has.

Here's a little something to
demonstrate my appreciation.

What's this, then?

It's a small token of my gratitude
for a profitably-spent evening.

A flower? Is that all?

Smell it.

Oh, Simon!

You're an angel.

It's lovely.

You really... You're a darling.

You really are.

Let's dance.

Claude, this is not an excuse-me.
Let's go, shall we?

I said let's go!
I suppose it's not a bad idea.

This place does go dead
after a while.

How long have I been here, Maggie?
Since nine o'clock, my angel.

We've had a wonderful evening.
Would you believe that?

Since nine o'clock.
Nine o'clock? Tell me more.

You can check with the barman
if you don't believe me.

minutes ago, you burgled
a house in Belgravia.

Stole a quarter of a million pounds'
worth of diamonds, resisted arrest, and assaulted a policeman.

Stole a police car and violated
every traffic law in the book!

Is that true, Simon?
Give me that ring, young lady.

That's mine!
It was stolen by Templar.

Why, you two-timing...

Maggie, I...

And taking into account that
the proceeds of your robbery,

jewellery on which the value
of £, has been placed,

and not yet recovered,

I have little hesitation in
sentencing you to ten years' imprisonment.

Let the prisoner be taken down.

In you go.

Hi.

Whose bunk is that?
Yours.

Maybe that one is.
I haven't decided yet.

Right, Al?
Yeah, that's right.

Then decide now.

So you're the Saint.

I'm John Wood, baby.

In here, you watch your manners
when you talk to me.

And don't you forget it.

Well, for now, just tell me
which bunk you want.

Yes, mate.

He'll let you know.

When he's made up his mind.

Like I said, I am the boss.

So you have to toe the line.
And you'll be all right.

I'll take the top one.

Wasn't bad.

Try this for size.

You just won't be told, will you?
Out!

We'll see what a dose of solitary
will do for you.

Wait, it wasn't his fault.
I started it.

It wasn't his fault.

Wait there.

Inside.

You'd better wipe your face.

Glad to see you're settling in.

I always said this is the place
you ought to be.

Come off it, Claude.
You'd miss me too much.

Don't you believe it. I'd give my
pension for that arrest and sentence to be genuine.

That's what worries me. You're the
only one who knows this whole set-up is a phoney.

So?
So without you, I'm dead.

Who's going to believe my story?

It would almost be worth it.

Any contact yet?

A little early, don't you think?

Sorry about the blood.

I take it you haven't recaptured
anybody.

Beats me. Ten escapes.

Three from this prison.

Not a trace.

It's as if they disappeared
into thin air.

A lot of them were big operators with
a pile of loot stashed away outside.

Like you.

Like me.

This place gives me the shivers.

Look, Simon, you're the bait.

Get me this escape g*ng.

Find the escape route
out of the country.

And find me the top man.

Claude, as much as I love you,
just remember one thing.

I am not doing this for you
or the police.

I want to prove Charlie Pearson
was innocent.

And find his m*rder*r.

Over there.

Now get this, you two.

No fighting, no more trouble.
Understand?

Yes, Staff.

How was it?

I'm rather partial
to solitary confinement.

Look.Top or bottom,
it doesn't make any difference.

Top.

Catch.

Thanks.

Can you imagine years of this?

Straitjackets.

Right out of my mind, baby.

Wood, shut your trap.
It's not a holiday camp.

See what I mean?

Those diamonds you stole.

What about them?

Anybody ever find them?
No.

Got them stashed away somewhere,
have you?

Maybe.

Like me. I did a bank job.

Got away with grand.

Nobody ever found that either.

Snooper! I'll use your left ear
for an ashtray!

So we're rich.

For all the good it does us.

I've been meaning to talk to you.

I plan to spend mine before
I get too old to enjoy it.

How?
If you can pay, you can get out.

What about me?

A word in the right direction.

You leave it to me, OK?

You want to make an investment?

In what?
Getting out.

Are you kidding?

It can be arranged.
How?

You just leave it up to me.

What does it cost?

, quid.

That's a lot of money.

Worth it.
Sure.

Are you in?
I'm in.

Consider it done.
When?

I'll let you know.

So you'd better have the bread,
friend.

If you don't pay up
with these people,

you double-cross them,

you'll wind up D-E-A-D.

Dead.

OK, baby?

Night night.

This is it, baby. We're on our way!

How?
Listen. The chopper.

As soon as you see it,
over the ridge.

All right, fall in! Come on now!

Get moving! Come on!

Fall in, you lot!

Come on! Get a move on!

Go!

Keep low and drop him!

Aaagh!

Any problems?
No, dead easy.

Met the helicopter
exactly as planned.

You boys are beautiful!
He's John Wood.

Glad you made it.
You and me both, baby.

And you must be Simon Templar.

Delighted to meet you.
Thanks.

I'm Harry.

Harry who?
Just Harry.

Where are we?
My garage, such as it is.

Where?
London.

Chaps, if you'll come with me, we'll
initiate phase two of the plan.

Gentlemen, this is Ann.

Mr Templar, Mr Wood.

How do you do?
Hello, princess.

Good morning, gentlemen.

Harry, get them a drink, will you?
Certainly. What will it be?

Scotch and water.
Bourbon.

It'll have to be Scotch.

Make yourselves comfortable.

Now to business.

Mr Wood, where do you want to go?

The wide open spaces
of Australia, princess.

Melbourne.

And you, Mr Templar?

Geneva.
Melbourne and Geneva.

That will be arranged.

How?

That, Mr Templar, is our business.

Not when I am paying £,
it isn't.

Oh, but I'm afraid it is, old chap.

You just have to take us on...
trust, so to speak.

Thanks.

We've fulfilled
our...part of the bargain.

Getting you out of...prison, I mean.

Mr Wood.
You sure did, baby.

A beautiful operation. Cheers.
Are you the boss of this outfit?

You are?
No.

You will meet our principal
in due course.

Now, passports.

Mr Templar.

I think you'll find it in order.

Very good.
Perfect.

Mr Wood, here is yours.

You're aware of our terms.

The next thing is payment.

You got away with £, from a
bank robbery in Fenchurch Street.

Yeah.
Where's the money now?

At the bottom of a box of books.

In storage? Where?

Liston Road, Hammersmith.

You get that, Jim?
Yep.

You don't need a claim check.

Just ask for Bert.
Tell him I sent you.

Right. I'll be back
in a couple of hours.

Right. Well, that takes care
of that.

Now I expect you'd like a hot bath
and a...rest.

Yeah.
Show him, Harry.

The pictures in these things
k*ll me.

First door on the right.
Thanks a lot, baby.

And now we come to you, Mr Templar.

Presumably, you think I'm going to
let Hilarious Harry here pick up my loot?

That is the way we operate.

Not with me.

Nobody goes for my diamonds
without me.

Take it or leave it.

Are they in London?
Mm-hm.

All right, Harry.
You can go with him.

Look here -
For heaven's sake!

Shut up and do as you're told!

Come on!

We'll see you later.

Indeed you will.

We're here. Don't move
till I open the...doors.

Dave! Turn her around!
We shouldn't be long.

The Sea-A-Go-Go.
Where you were arrested.

That's right.

Come on, Templar! Where are they?

I have them.

Put the g*n away, Harry.

Forgive him, darling. He's nervous.

Who is she?

You might say
we're romantically linked.

Where are they?
A safety deposit box.

What?!

Harry, you don't just leave a
quarter of a million pounds' worth of diamonds lying around.

Go and get them.
I can't.

Why not?
It's : and the banks are closed.

Let me tell you about Charlie.

Likeable chap actually.

Almost a gentleman.

He went to...prison
for embezzlement.

Nearly a million...pounds' worth
of negotiable bonds.

What happened to him?

We got him out of...prison,
old chap.

But when the time came to...pay up,

he said he was innocent.

Funnily enough, he was.

There weren't any bonds.

But he'd made the mistake
of conning us.

So...poor Charlie ended up dead.

Charlie Pearson.

That's right.

His body was found
in a ditch in Kent.

Just let it be a warning.

Did you do it, Harry?

No. But believe me...Templar,
it could happen to you.

We get the message,
don't we, darling?

Yes.

So you'll get the diamonds tomorrow.

As soon as the banks open.

You see?

Perfectly simple.

I'll deliver them
to wherever you tell me.

You're not going to deliver them
anywhere.

Whatever you say, Harry.

Get them...tomorrow,
the moment the banks open.

Then go home and wait
for instructions.

From Mr...Templar.

All right.

Shall we leave?

Now what?

You've heard about the self-denial
of prison life.

Simon. I missed you.

Me too.

Come on.

Dave, just a minute.

Take him back.
You're not coming?

Later. I want to keep
an eye on his...girl.

He's with a man who came right out
and said they'd k*lled my father.

He...
He practically boasted about it.

Penny, this is what
I want you to do.

Bring the note and meet me in front
of Havelock's statue in Trafalgar Square in minutes.

READS: Contact Teal.

Will get... Get the diamonds?

Tell him if he wants Mr Big to
co-operate right down the line.

You will do it?

Don't have a choice.

I'll bring the diamonds.

Don't worry. This will work.
Simon's terribly clever.

Terribly.

He's risking his life trying to
find the man who k*lled my father.

When he does,
you'll get all the credit.

I sincerely hope so.

Where's Harry?

Had some unfinished business
to attend to.

And why shouldn't Penny meet
somebody in Trafalgar Square?

People do all the time, you know?

He could be a cop.
Of course he's a cop.

I just escaped from prison.

Penny's sitting on £, worth
of diamonds.

So naturally, some of our best
friends are cops.

We're like that. Strange tastes.

He's right. You're overreacting.

That remains to be seen.

Get the van. We are moving you
out tonight, Mr Templar.

See anything?

Not a thing.

Pretty steamed up about where we're
going, baby.

Natural curiosity.

Not me. If they wanna make a big
secret over how they operate, I couldn't care less.

All I wanna do is spend this.

Wanna see it?
Why not?

Look at it.

All right.

Out you get, lads.

The end of the line. Follow me.

RADIO: Here is the nine o'clock news.

The search for the two prisoners who
escaped from Dartmoor early this morning continues.

The two prisoners overcame a guard
and escaped by helicopter.

Come!

Clients delivered, sir.
Bring them in.

Ah, gentlemen. Come in.
Delighted to see you.

I'm Colonel Roberts.
Obviously, you're Mr Templar.

Pour yourself a drink.
Thank you.

And you must be Wood.

John Wood. Colonel.

You've got a beautiful operation.
Just beautiful!

Thank you. We try
to give value for money.

Is there any Bourbon?
Sorry, there isn't time.

Why not?
You are going on immediately.

Unfortunately, Mr Templar has to
wait over until he's paid his - shall we say - fare?

Where do I go? How do I get there?
France, by boat.

Jim will brief you. And take care
of your passage money.

Off you go, Wood.

So long, Simon.

Bring him back
when he's ready to leave.

Right, sir.

This yours?
Just a hobby.

What did you use on him?

A crossbow.

It's too simple with a r*fle.

A trick I learned
in my old commando days.

Your good health.
Cheers.

Why risk your neck crawling up
on a sentry with a Kn*fe

when you can get him through
the heart at yards with one of these?

It's a very satisfactory w*apon,
actually.

You fancy a try?

Why not?

I gather we're somewhere
on the south coast.

Near enough. Got a small boat
down in the harbour. -footer.

Not a bad old tub.

They work better with these.

Thanks.

So you take us across the Channel?

Only halfway.
We swim the rest?

You know archery, of course.

A little.

We're met by another boat,
is that it?

In mid-Channel. Neither boat's
been to the other side.

So when they get back,
they aren't checked. Quite simple.

Very good.

I've had quite a bit of practice.

I must say, Colonel,
you are very well organised.

Not bad actually.

You and Wood make it ten
I've got out this year.

At £, a time.

Our standard price.

Jolly well done.

Come!

All ready?
Ready.

Colonel, thank you.
Not at all.

Simon, if you ever get to Melbourne,
look me up.

Best of luck.
You too.

Have a good trip.
What's the weather like?

Calm.
Good. You won't get seasick.

I won't. Good luck.

Care to take me on?

A pound a bull's-eye?
Why not make it five?

As you wish.

Incidentally, this girlfriend
of yours,

Penny something or other...

Penny Williams.

Singer, isn't she?

Yes. What about her?

It's just that I do hope
she's reliable.

Well done. Six in a row.

£.

Sheer luck.
That may change.

Excuse me.

Colonel Roberts.

I have some interesting
information for you.

Harry has been suspicious
of Templar all along.

That is something
we both have in common.

So tonight, he did
a little checking.

This girlfriend of his,
Williams is her stage name.

Her real name is Penny Pearson.

How extraordinary!

Didn't Charlie Pearson
have a daughter?

Yes, indeed. You're quite right.

It's a common enough name.

But it makes you think, doesn't it?

How true that is.

What do you want us to do?

Harry is to pick up the diamonds.

Shall we go ahead?

Absolutely.
With the usual precautions.

All right.

We'll be down after lunch.

I'll look forward to that. Goodbye.

Well?

We go ahead.

You all set?
Yeah.

How is that other boat going to
find us in all this fog, baby?

Baby?

Oh, no, no, no!

And Templar's next!

I need hardly remind you
they're all accounted for.

Come and look.

See that van?

One of my best men.

There will also be a police car
a block away.

As soon as you get your
instructions, call me.

You'll be followed
to where they're keeping him.

Templar, sir.

Ah. Good morning, Colonel.

I trust you slept well.
Very well.

And you?

Just a touch of claustrophobia.

The locked door,
the bars at the window.

We do have to be careful.

:. Presumably by now, your
girlfriend has been to the bank.

Why don't I call and ask her?

If you'd be so kind.

London is and then the number.

tell her to drive down the A.

After she goes through Hurst Green,

she has to watch out for
a roadside cafe on the right.

Tell her to pull in there
and wait for us.

Hello.

Simon! I thought you'd never call.

Have you got the tickets?
Yes, I've got them.

Good. Well, I've met
the tour organiser.

All I need is the rest
of my travel allowance.

This is what I want you to do.

A. Yes.

On the right.

Yes, I've got that.

Don't worry.
Everything is under control.

Good. If you leave straight away,
I'll see you in a couple of hours.

Bye, darling.

Everything arranged?
Everything.

Good. How about some breakfast?

Anything you particularly fancy?

I'm the hard-boiled egg type.

All right, Inspector Teal.
I'm leaving now.

Please don't be alarmed.

There's been a slight change
of plan.

I don't understand. Simon gave me -

Yes, we know.

Take your coat off, will you?

Why? What are you going to do?
Precautions, my dear.

Elementary ones. We think
the...police may be on to you.

Impossible!
You have the diamonds?

Of course. I said I would, didn't I?

Look here -

We're only...protecting
your interests.

You don't want Mr...Templar
to be caught, do you?

Of course not. But...

And you do want to get safely
out of the country with him?

Don't you?

Yes, but I don't think -
Run along, Ann.

Now, you leave the thinking to us.

And you'll be much, much safer.

Subject leaving her residence
at :.

Seems our precautions
were necessary after all.

I don't understand it.
Don't you really?

It couldn't be the police.
It's just a coincidence.

A van like that could be driven
by anybody.

A van, yes. But not that one.

Don't worry. We'll wait for...ten
minutes till Ann's drawn them off and then use my car.

It's...parked behind the building.

Come!

Ah, you must be Penny.
How nice to meet you.

Hello, darling.
Simon.

Don't worry. We'll soon be in France,
safe and sound.

Harry.
Yes, Colonel.

Any problems?
Only the...police.

We draw them off. Plan B.

Mr Templar, how do you suppose
the police got involved?

Obviously, you underestimated
Scotland Yard.

Penny, my dear,
I want to talk to you.

Your last name is Pearson.

No, Williams.

You're Charlie Pearson's daughter.
How very interesting.

My father was innocent.

He didn't steal those bonds.

He couldn't give them to you
because he never had them!

My dear, I assure you that your
father, innocent though he may well have been,

was not singled out
for any special treatment.

Harry, the diamonds.

Beautiful.

Gentlemen, do you mind?

Harry, make sure that Mr Templar
doesn't give us any more trouble.

Are you always this ugly
or is my vision blurred?

Maybe you're seasick.
Could be. I have a weak stomach.

It won't last for long.

Can I have a glass of water?
Sure.

Since it will be your last.

You give it to him.

Cut the motors, Dave. Bring them up.

Right.

Aaagh!

Get below.

How many more up there?
The colonel and one other.

This is the end of the line,
isn't it, Colonel?

Nobody ever gets to France.
Of course it is, old chap.

Why should I be content
with a mere £,

when I can take it all?

Keep back.

Hold it, Templar.

Throw the g*n on the floor.

All right, Templar.
Now come up here.

A breath of sea air
might do you good.

The blocks, Dave.

You're right, Colonel.
The sea air did do me good.