06x20 - The World Beater

[bunniefuu]

SIMON: To me, driving a rally car is
more than just a test of skill.

It's an experience of extreme
sensuality,

a partnership between car and driver,

of power, speed and satisfaction.

Ah, she's a good looker.

Put your money behind her, Mr Laker.
You won't go far wrong.

You won't go wrong at all, Mr Laker.

Now, don't rush me, fellas.

Yours isn't the only car in the
running.

All ready, Simon?
You bet.

Heading north on Transmere Avenue.
Over.

All right, Simon, put her through
her paces.

Giving her a little more gas, George,
and into the bend.

Very nice, George.

Holds the road like a leech.

No tail wag.

miles an hour.

A car like that could give us a lot
of trouble.

If we let it.

Pushing her a bit now, George.
Braking test.

Here we go. Coming up now.

Great! Steady as a rock.

You've got a winner here, George...

What is it? It's that voice.

It's somehow familiar.

Something's wrong, George.

The steering's gone.

I just hope that driver isn't hurt.

We can't always calculate.

Oh!

Are you all right? Oh, sure I am!

Happens to me every day on the
freeway.

For a moment, it certainly looked like
curtains for the impetuous Simon Templar.

I can't take it in. I can't believe
it.

Could it have come loose by itself?
Never in a million years.

So somebody's trying to put us out
of business.

Which they have. You'd better call
your insurance company.

Insurance?

You know what it costs to insure a
design car?

You mean you're not insured?

We couldn't afford it.

No, Simon, this is the end for me.

But, George, you've got the practice
car. We can fix it in time.

Not a chance. I've lost enough at
this game already. I'm getting out.

Back to fixing flats and b*ating out
panels, eh?

Well, at least the money's certain.

George, don't quit.

What would you do?

I'd fix the practice car.

Dad, be sensible! There's enough time.

There's not enough money.

Hmm.

So all my eggs are in one basket?

Looks like it.

Mr Laker, if you are backing a car
this year, you've really no choice.

Miss Collingwood, I still have the
choice between yes and no.

Of course.

You do well in the rally with your
car, I'll say yes. But you've got
to b*at the big companies.

We'll do it.We've got the car.

What sort of driver? First-class.

Get rid of him. I don't understand.

I want Simon Templar.

But he's driving for cousin George.

Not any more he isn't.

But I mean, with the wreck and
everything, I mean...

I hardly like to ask. It seems...

Get him.

Otherwise I'm not interested.
Understand?

I only back winners.

But what's your objection to
Templar?

You know him?

Far too well.

But either Templar drives or Laker
won't put up a penny.

Make Templar refuse.

Well, I'll try.

Hard.

We've got to stay clear of him.

Aren't you coming in? Uh-uh.

You're going to have to find
yourself a lift home.

George, I...I just came to say how
sorry I am.

Well, you know.

How did it happen?

The steering was fixed.

Fixed?

You mean deliberately?

HAPGOOD: Deliberately.

Simon, this is Justin Pritchard.

Unfortunately, he's my nephew.
How do you do?

How do you do?

George and Justin used to work
together.

Now they call it friendly rivalry.
Friendliness from George, rivalry from Justin.

Oh, Dad, come off it!

It's all right, George, I'm used to
it.

You're covered, of course, for
insurance?

Can you afford to pay the premiums
they ask?

Well, I'm going to have to, if
there's sabotage around.

It's working out all right for you,
isn't it, Justin?

Laker will be backing you now.

Um, George, could I have a word with
you?

George, this business about Templar
driving my car...

I mean...

Well, do you mind?

No.

I'm er...pulling out of the design
business.

The stakes are too high.

If Simon will drive the Sentinel,
you're welcome to him.

Do you think he will?

Why not ask him yourself?

Hey!

Can't you read the diversion sign?

Hello, Miss Collingwood. Dilys.

Oh, there's someone to see you. I
showed him into your room.

Client?

He didn't say. More business, maybe.

Or more trouble.

Hello, Kay.

I trust you find my chair
comfortable?

Very.

The last time I was here, the notice
on the door said

"Collingwoods Limited, dealers in
precious stones".

And?

The time before that, "Kay
Collingwood Escort Bureau".

Both legitimate businesses.

Yes, so you always insisted when your
clients complained.

Now you've tied up with a young man
called...Justin Pritchard?

And there's no helpful information on
the door.

I'm giving him the benefit of my
experience...

as a public relations consultant.

It's a pretty wide field, public
relations.

You don't mind?

I have no secrets from you, Simon.

The only way to conduct a friendship.

Great! Steady as a rock. You've got a
winner here, George.

The voice sounds familiar.

Something's wrong, George...

You don't imagine I had anything to
do with the crash?

Let's say I don't rule out the
possibility.

Unusually naive of you, Simon.

It's my middle name.

My business is information.

Long-range selector. It can pick out
a conversation on May Day in Red Square.

How exciting.

Amplifier. In the next room, you can
hear a pin drop.

Or a garter snap?

DILYS: She's got a man with her.

And last but not least...

The miniaturised transmitter.

Where would industrial espionage be
without it?

Impressed?

Yes, enough to join your team.

What does that mean?

Oh, enough to accept Laker's invitation
to drive the Sentinel in the rally.

May I use your phone?

Make yourself at home.

Er, Mr Laker, please. Simon Templar.

Are we partners, then?

Well, Laker seemed to like the idea. But I felt
that young Justin was just a fraction less keen.

That's because he doesn't know you,
Simon.

There. What's that for?

That's for good luck in the rally.

Let bygones be bygones, shall we?

Why not?

Wow!

You can say that again, Dilys.

She loves me not.

She loves me not.

She loves me.

Hello, Justin.

I'm...I'm glad Simon changed his
mind.

So is Harold Laker. That's what
counts.

Is she ready?

Sure.

Full race camshaft, latest crossflow
cylinder head,

fully lightened, balanced and tuned
for maximum brake horsepower.

Good enough for you?

If you're satisfied.

You'd better be going. Right.

And this time, go easy.

Don't overdo it today, though. It's
only a trial run.

In fact, I'd be a lot happier if you
took out the practice car.

The reactions will be different.

Think of all the dynamically balanced
parts.

OK, but don't push it too hard.

Wait till she's on the start line.

Yes, sir.

It'll be interesting.

To see how it shapes up against your
car? Mm-hm.

Don't worry, I'll give you a full
report.

I'll get her well clear of the built-up
area & then I'll put her through her paces.

OK, Simon.

It's a great car. I hope Templar's
as good.

If the car has what it takes, you've
got tomorrow's rally as good as won.

And Harold Laker's backing.

Ask him what'shappening.

Templar? Templar, can you hear me?

Templar, are you all right?

Templar, can you hear me?

Don't say it. I can tell by your face.

You want the Sentinel wrecked.

But you don't want Templar hurt.
What do you think I am? A magician.

I think you're a...

No saboteur in the world could get
into this.

Or out of it.

Maybe you should keep this.

OK.

Tell me, if anything happened to the
Sentinel,

how long would it take to get this
one ready?

We'd never do it in time. Why do you ask?

Oh, I just thought if the worst
happened...

It's up to us to make sure it doesn't.

In shape and with the right driver,
that car can b*at anything in this rally.

Including George's?

The Sentinel would have beaten that,
too.

Oh, the cars are similar - the
chassis, transmission.

But mine's got features, Templar.

Features I've developed.

Which makes it a world-beater?

Sure.

If you're the driver you're cracked
up to be.

I suppose Justin's all set to win?

Well, he seems reasonably optimistic.

You know what makes me so mad?

Ever since they were kids, Justin's
always gotten the better of George.

Natural talent?

No, George quits so easily, that's
all.

Tell me something.

Why is Harold Laker so impatient?

He wants to put money into a new
design this year.

All the other cars in the Laker rally don't
need development money. They have it.

So Justin's Sentinel and this are the
only two independent entries?

Until yesterday.

Now Justin's got the field all
clear.

He doesn't even have to win. All he
has to do is make a reasonably good showing.

But could George have won with this
practice model?

With you driving, I think we'd have
had a fighting chance.

But he's thrown in the sponge.

He figures we haven't a prayer of
getting this practice car ready in time.

What do you think?

I'm only the mechanic around here.

Not for me to say, is it?

Nice of you to drop in.

Especially since we missed each other
on the road this morning.

Oh, before you go...

..I think we should have a chat.

OK, let's talk. Who sent you?

You gonna make me work for it?

Was it Kay Collingwood? Yeah.

And Justin? Yeah, both of them.

Why?

All right.

After this morning's ride, I'll tell
you why.

Because Justin's Sentinel is a
washout.

I stand more chance in the rally in a
farm tractor.

If Laker were to see the Sentinel's
performance, he wouldn't invest in it. Right?

It needs another year's work.

With George Hapgood's car running,
they didn't have a year.

So they stopped George from entering

and then they planned to sabotage the Sentinel
so that neither car could run tomorrow. Right?

Why not ask them?

You have a point.

Where are they? I was to ring Kay's
office.

At two in the morning? That's what
she said.

Well, never argue with a lady. Come
on.

DILYS: This is a recorded message.

The offices of Kay Collingwood
Associates have closed.

Your message will be attended to
first thing in the morning.

Please state your name and telephone
number.

Speak now.

You heard.

Tom.

Everything according to plan.

Kay's equipment-crazy.

It's her age.

Now, listen, Tom. I have a little
advice for you.

You're going to run. Run?

Mm-hm. And you're going to keep on
running until you're a long, long way

from Kay Collingwood, George
Hapgood...

..and especially me.

Good morning, Kay.

Good morning. I hope you had a good
night's sleep. It's a tough course.

Very restful, thanks. All according
to plan.

What does what mean?

I planned a restful night. A good book, an
electric blanket, nine hours of beddy-bye.

I'm so glad. You'll need it.

You think so? It's pretty gruelling,
hours nonstop.

Oh, I have a strong constitution, as
you know only too well.

Will you be following the rally?
I wouldn't dream of missing it.

After all, it is Justin's big chance.

In fact, his last.

What?

Are you sure you won't be needed at
the office?

I mean, your other clients.

You do have other clients?

Of course. But my office practically
runs itself.

Ah, yes, all those expensive gadgets.

And Dilys, of course.

Of course, Dilys. Mustn't forget her.

I suppose she's absolutely
trustworthy?

Morning, Kay.

Morning. Morning.

Well, let's get the show on the road.

I'll bring her out for you.

Not without the key, you won't.

Looks like it did the job.

Looks like it.

Simon, do something.

What would you suggest?

Oh, Justin.

Well, I'm afraid all that foam's not going to do
much for your fully lightened and balanced parts

to say nothing of your latest crossflow
cylinder head and full race camshaft.

Justin, I'm so terribly, terribly sorry.

Me, too.

In spite of all our precautions,
sabotage.

No doubt about it.

Three years of work ruined.

All that dreaming, all that
planning.

And plotting.

To impress Laker, I mean.

Now he won't see the Sentinel in action.

Never mind, Kay. There's always next year.

Yes, by then, she could be even better.

That is, of course, if you have
enough money to continue development work.

Thank heavens there's the insurance
money.

Will that be enough to carry on for a
year?

We're adequately protected.

Well, let's hope you have a reputable
insurance company.

You know how tricky these
fly-by-night operations can be.

It's a solid company.

And the policy specifically includes
malicious damage.

So we're OK.

Except for...Except for what?

How does the policy read exactly?

I've told you. It's in black and
white, malicious damage.

Ah, that is malicious damage against
your number one car, the Sentinel?

That's right.Then you have no basis
for a claim.

What do you mean?

Well, you're not covered for malicious damage
against your number two car, the practice one?

Of course not. But it's the Sentinel
that's been damaged.

There is nothing wrong with the
Sentinel.

A quick little tape-up job. I
switched them last night.

You mean that's the competition car?

Do you mean it's been there all
night unprotected?

That's right.

So Harold Laker gets to see how good
she is after all.

Aren't you lucky?

Something wrong? Your navigator
hasn't turned up.

Oh, is that bad?

You can't enter a rally without a
navigator.

Map reading, relief driving - it's a
highly skilled job.

No?

Who is he, the navigator?

Works for Justin. Tom Stevens.

Oh, Tom! I forgot to tell you.

He's decided to give up the rally game.

Taken up running.

Oh, it's true.

He's going to be a track star.

Track star?

Mm. He told me last night. In fact, I
advised him it was a good move.

All right, Simon, what's going on?
Where did you see Tom Stevens?

Oh, last night. Didn't I mention it?

You mentioned a good book and an
electric blanket.

But...But no Tom Stevens.

Too bad. He seemed to be quite a good
friend of yours.

I don't know what you're talking about.

You do, Kay.

You do.

Anyhow, Simon, you can't drive
without a navigator. That's flat.

You used to have quite a reputation.

As a navigator, I mean.

Forget it.

Shouldn't really be doing this. Supposed to
be unbiased in my own rally. But good luck.

If the Sentinel does well today,
you'll do well for all of us.

Not a chance. What?

You can't enter without a navigator.

You made the rules. No navigator?

That's right.

That is, unless Miss Collingwood...

Does she know how?

Oh, she knows how.

Simon, it's been ages since I was in
a rally...

Darling, once a lesson is learnt, it
is never forgotten.

No, it's out of the question.

Answer me, Miss Collingwood, are you
qualified as a navigator?

Well, I...Yes.

And you want her?

Desperately.

Then that settles it.But, Mr
Laker...

If the Sentinel does well today,

it will mean a great deal of
valuable publicity.

If you're going to quibble about a
little thing like this,

then you can forget about my backing

and you can write the Laker
Engineering Company out of your future.

Is that clear?

Well, there you are, darling. You'd
better go and get changed.

You can't enter a rally in those
clothes.

You never know when you'll have to
get out and push.

High-spirited.

Yes, but I wouldn't have it any other
way in a woman.

What's the matter?

Well, for a start, Templar knows
that Tom tried to sabotage the Sentinel

and that we put him up to it.

How do you know?

There are ways Simon Templar has of
saying things.

I just know, that's all.

Now he wants me to navigate for him.

What?

And so does Laker.

Otherwise we can write him off...

for all time.

Kay, forget the insurance. I'll
withdraw the car, say it has a fault.

There'll be all sorts of questions
asked.

Look, Kay...

Oh, Justin, let me do the thinking,
will you?

There's a man outside who knows most,
if not all the answers, do you understand?

No.

I'll put it this way. The doors of
prison are swinging wide open - for us.

If we don't want a spell inside,

we play along with Simon Templar.

cars, gentlemen, starting from
here,

up north, and returning via this
easterly route and home.

Details will be radioed from every
checkpoint to these sets here

so that hour-to-hour placings can be
made up.

Now, the start is am today and the
finish am tomorrow.

So that's hours...

and ten minutes to go.

ANNOUNCER: Would the drivers of the
first ten cars get ready, please?

Ready? As ready as I'll ever be.

I think we're coming up for time
now, don't you?

Yes. All right.

Ladies and gentlemen,

the rally scrutineers have now completed
their examination of your vehicles.

Car in position, please.

MAN: Careful!

I'd like to get one thing clear.

If I can help.

You can. I want to know exactly what
we're going to do in this rally.

We're out to win.

That's impossible.

Is it?

Oh, all right, I shouldn't have
asked.

Right.

ANNOUNCER: Cars , , and , move
forward, please.

I know what you're up to, my lad.

You're out to show Laker once and
for all that this car's a flop.

Car to the start line, please.

Right.

Good luck!

Car to the start line, please.

Justin will look like a fool and
George Hapgood will get another
chance with a new car next year.

Right? No, I mean what I say.

We're out to win.

An exquisite sense of fair play.

You give the Sentinel every chance
to fall flat on its face.

Maps? Yes.

Of Napoleon's retreat from Moscow.

w*r And Peace. Should last me
through to the finish.

Checkpoint six, Car , driver
Wilson.

hours, seconds. Right.

Jim.

I didn't want Templar. You and Laker
pushed him onto me.

Don't worry. Simon may seem flippant,
but er...behind a wheel, he's dead serious.

Driver Gordon, checked in.

There's a checkpoint coming up.

That's your job.

OFFICIAL: Car , driver Templar.

hours, minutes, seconds.
Congratulations.

For what? You're second.

The only one ahead of you is Wilson
in .

Simon, did you hear that? We're
second out of the whole field.

We've got a chance.

A chance of winning £,.

There's a turn-off approaching. Ours?

Yes. No, erm...

Wait.

Next one.

Checkpoint eight, Car , driver
Templar.

hours, right.

Jim.

Come on!

RADIO: Checkpoint , Car ...

I can hardly believe it. We're still
second on points.

Looks good, all right. A great car!

Next right.

And it's a narrow lane.

What's it like your side?

Muddy.

Fancy that.

You'd better get out and push.

Push...

Push?

£,. Do you want to win it or not?

Hey!

Watch it!

Watch what? Oh, forget it.

Are you ready?

Push.

Push!

I am doing!

Argh!

OK, you can stop pushing now.

Are you all right?

I'd get out and help you, only it's
muddy.

Come on, , quid.

Oh!

Simon, if we win,

we split the £,, right?

That depends on how well you do your job.

For that money, I'll be perfect.

At the next rally sign, turn right.

And keep well over.

I'm gonna ruin my nails. What did
you say?

I said I'm gonna ruin my nails!

You should have brought a shovel.

All good navigators do.

There.

Splendid.

We're in the clear. Maybe.

We're going to win!

That , beautiful, lovely pounds!

Looks as though you've done it.
We're as good as home.

A sad day for you, though, George.

As he says, that's the way it goes.

At least I supplied the driver.

We were right about Templar.

I take back all I said.

He's the best.

He'll be here in a minute.

Here he is!

You're a miracle worker. We win the
rally and it's raining champagne.

Well, they still have to check our
times.

Let's wait here.

Until they slip a cheque through the
side window?

You weren't always so totally
unromantic.

Ah, but I have a short memory.

You must remind me sometime.

And now, Miss Collingwood, I think the
time has come for you to face the music.

So let me get this straight. You say
this car is not the Sentinel?

With the exception of the bodywork
and the chassis, no.

Were the start line seals broken?

No, they were all still intact.

So this car was driven throughout the rally
& there was no substitute drafted in halfway?

No. No irregularities there.

And the engine capacity meets our
rules?

Absolutely.

So it was a fair win, but this car
is not the one entered as ?

No.

It's George Hapgood's car.

Everything but the shell.

I don't get it. George's car was
wrecked.

George's competition car was wrecked.
This is the practice version.

Practice version?

What, you mean this is my practice
car with...

the Sentinel's body?

That's right. Your father turned it
out in one night.

I told you it could be done, George.

Well, are all the cars in yet?

And the results checked.

Well, then, I've...

That's it, George. You have won the
Laker Rally.

I'll sue.

I'll prosecute. I'll...I'll...

You'll shut up! Or Simon Templar
will have us both in jail.

Ladies and gentlemen,

it is now official - the winner's
trophy to Mr George Hapgood.

Congratulations, George.

Didn't I do my share? Oh, you were
marvellous.

I hate to think what would have
happened if we'd had the other navigator.

What was his name? The one that took
up cross-country running. Tom?

LAKER: And the winning driver's cheque

to Miss Kay Collingwood and Mr Simon
Templar.

Thank you, Mr Laker.

Half. You promised.

No, Kay. Not until you mend your ways.

Mr Laker.

Thank you.Goodbye. Good morning.

Goodbye. Bye.

Thank you, my dear. Good morning.

Is she free now?

I'll see.

Mr Templar's here.

I'll come out. Right.

She'll be right out. Really?

Simon, darling! You've come to give
me my money.

Yes, but I am a little baffled.

The clergymen, darling.

Are you being baptised, christened,
married or buried?

None of your business.

I've finished, Miss Collingwood. Do
you like it?

Oh, no, Kay.

Not the church.

Simon, they're loaded!

And I need money so badly.

May I?

How badly?

No, don't. Don't make me, Simon,
please.

That's better.

You know, Kay, one of these days, you
are going to come to a sticky end.

But not yet, darling.

Not yet.