02x02 - Ain't That A Glitch Part 2

[bunniefuu]

[upbeat music]

-Lay Lay Lay Lay Lay Lay.
-Oh, this is bad.

This is bad. This is bad.

-Lay Lay Lay Lay.
-I know. You're glitching.

Lay Lay Lay Lay.

I know, if we don't fix this,
it'll ruin my parents' night

and our chances of performing in front

of era-era Iggy Azalea.

Lay Lay Lay Lay.

[gasps] You're right.

Then my parents will find out
you're an avatar from my phone,

and they'll know that we lied to them.

Then, they'll hand you
over to the government,

where you'll be plugged into
a giant supercomputer in Nevada.

Oh, and then I'll never see you,
because my mom says

the desert makes her ashy,
and we won't go there.

You understood all that?

Of course, I did. I'm her bestie.

Lay Lay.

Well, what about my InstaShave plans?

-Lay Lay!
-Hey, hey, hey.

I understood that one.

Hey, kids, we were so excited about Iggy,

I forgot to ask if your song was ready.

Ah, we're good. Great.

You don't not have anything
to worry about.

Sweet James Brown, a double negative?

What's wrong?

Trish Showtime Alexander
will get you ready.

Trish?

We have a serious situation.

Jasmine's coming over.

She wants to hear our speech.

Oh, right.

We have to make a speech.

I was so focused on getting Iggy on board,

I kind of did not not think about it.

A double negative? Mom, are you okay?

I'm not not fine!
Everybody, get off my back!

When you mother has to speak in public,

she gets, uh, a little freaked out.

But she's Trish Showtime Alexander.

She's great at performing.

When she has to sing or dance.

But when she has to give a speech,

you get Trish
deer-in-the-headlights Alexander.

See?

Roadkill.

-Oh.
-This is our big night.

We can't look crazy in front of our peers.

Or in front of Iggy.

Who is also our peer.

-Lay Lay.
-[buzzing noise]

Lay Lay. Lay Lay.

-What is happening?
-[Lay Lay] Lay Lay.

Uh, she's just saying...

♪ Go, Trish ♪

♪ You got this ♪

[both] ♪ Go, Trish ♪

♪ You got this ♪

[all] ♪ Go, Trish ♪

♪ You got this ♪

♪ Go, Trish ♪

♪ You got this ♪

Yes!

I can do this.

[both] Whoo!

[Bryce] Hey...now you're running?

[Trish] Lay Lay fired me up.

We have to figure out how to fix Lay Lay,

because this ain't okay-kay.

Lay Lay.

Oh, you're right. That is bars.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

Oh, what am I gonna do?

You know I can't speak in front of people.

This is your fault.

How is it my fault?

When we got married, it gave me license

to blame all my irrational fears on you.

Listen, babe, big daddy Bryce got you.

I learned a thing or two
about public speaking

when I was in the play
Cat on a Hot Tin Roof.

Just get to the point, Bryce.

Okay.

Confidence is the key.

Now, pretend I'm the audience,
and confidently,

let me hear your speech.

Hi...

[screams]

Okay, uh, that could use a little work.

Oh, I can't do it.

I can't speak in front of
all those people.

My mom's gonna think
I don't appreciate her.

[doorbell rings]

Oh my gosh, it's Jasmine!

Hey, relax. Relax.

I'm gonna open the door.

You're gonna do your thing,

and Jasmine's gonna love it.

I got this.

I got this.

I got this.

Hi.

I'm so excited to hear your speech.

And go.

Okay, do your thing.

[clears throat]

Hi...

[screams]

Should I call the paramedics?

I know. It needs work.

Okay?

Trish performs better when there's a b*at.

So what if she did it like a spoken word,

and I'll accompany with some bongos?

Okay. Make that work.

Love you both. Air kisses.

Bye!

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

Lay Lay.

I love it. Thanks.

My hair looks fantastic.

Lay Lay.

Yeah, yeah, I know.

No one's hair is as fly as yours.

Lay Lay.

I got it.

I know how to fix Lay Lay.

You do?

Lay Lay came from your phone. Right?

So why don't we fix her like a phone?

I called a cell phone repairman
from Nerd Knights

and told them my phone was glitching.

They'll be right over.

Won't they be suspicious

when they see your phone isn't broken?

That's why...

I put yours in a pitcher of water.

Marky!

You'll thank me later.

Okay, the Nerd Knight van just pulled up.

You guys stay here and listen.

When he tells me how to fix my phone,

I'll yell the instructions to you,
and you follow them, okay?

Sounds like a great plan.

Lay Lay.

Yep. It's a totally stupid plan.

[faux British accent] Hear ye, hear ye.

It is I, Sir Fix-A-Lot.

I like big ruts and I cannot lie.

So what, pray tell,
seems to ail thee, me lord?

My good sir, the phone keeps glitching.

Ah, the dreaded glitch.

Oh, how it lays low the good townspeople.

Well, nary thee worry, me lord.

I can slay this dragon of a problem.

Awesome. What do we do?

Well, first, we want to remove
all frivolous features

that could be slowing down thy phone.

-Got it.
-Yeah.

[yelling]
I'll remove everything frivolous!

Okay, let's get rid of the stuff
you don't need.

-Lay Lay.
-Got it.

Bling is not frivolous.

Well, also, sometimes,
thy phone can overheat.

Now, may I recommend the fanning motion?

[yelling] Shake the phone to cool it down!

Lay Lay Lay Lay Lay Lay.

Lay Lay!

The final step, the coup de grace,

would be to hold down thy power button

to reset thy phone.

[yelling] Hold down the power button
to reset the phone!

[dropping accent] Kid, are you okay,

or do you just like shouting?

Power button?

Where's your power button, Lay Lay?

-Lay Lay.
-Okay.

Lay Lay.

Lay Lay. Lay Lay.

Lay Lay. Lay Lay.

Lay... [powering down]

Oh, my gosh.

[accented] Once thy phone reboots,

it should function in its normal capacity,

and verily,
thou shall live happily ever after.

Thanks, Sir Fix-A-Lot.

My pleasure, my lord.

I am off henceforth and whither
to the windows to the wall.

Exeunt with a flourish.

-It worked?
-I think so.

She's still rebooting.
We need a little more time.

[Trish] Kids, time to leave
for the CHoFMAs.

Sadie, drop Lay Lay and run.

Marky, calm down. I have an idea.

One second, Mom.

Oh, is that the bongo for my speech?

No, this is the bongo for the luau
I'm going to after the show.

Let's leave the sarcasm at home, huh?

Kids, we have to go. We're gonna be late.

Ready for the CHoFMAs.

Oh, Bryce, let me fix your collar.

Okay, it's time to go. The driver's here.

You got us a driver?

No. It's me.

I'm the driver.

Let's go, kids.

Right behind you.

Hey, this girl's bling is heavy.

How does she hold herself up?

♪ I'm Sadie's affirmation app ♪

♪ And so no matter what happens
I got her back ♪

♪ 'Cause see my homey Sadie
Wished on a star ♪

♪ She said, "I wish you were real" ♪

♪ Now I'm as real as you are ♪

♪ And now who's coming Out the app? ♪

♪ That girl Lay Lay ♪

♪ Who's avatar power Is to freeze? ♪

♪ That girl Lay Lay ♪

♪ All day, all day
It's your girl ♪

♪ That girl, that girl
That girl Lay Lay ♪

[upbeat music]

I hope she reboots soon.

It's almost showtime.

[buzzing noise]

Whoa. Something's happening.

Do you think the reboot worked?

[hiccups] Lay Lay?

It did not.

That Sir Fix-A-Lot is getting one star.

Whew, fake it till you make it.

Fake it till you make it.

Tonight, we own the world.

Or at least downtown Cleveland.

Oh, hey, kids.

Hey...

Come over here for a sec.

Look at this place.

In just an hour,

it's gonna be filled with
hundreds of people.

[screams]

You got your hands full, bongo boy.

Hi, guys.

Hi, Jasmine.

Where's Iggy?

Funny story.

Not in a ha-ha way, more like a,

"Ooh, that's completely ruined your night"
kind of way.

Jasmine, you don't want
to play with me right now.

Cut to the chase.

All right.

Iggy was dropping a puck
at a big hockey game in Calgary

and got snowed in.

She can't make it to the show.

[all] What?

She's really sorry,
like super-duper sorry.

What are we supposed to do?

This is our parents' big night.

Lay Lay!

That's right, Lay Lay.

You're going to get to perform, too.

If it's any consolation,

Iggy said I should introduce you guys.

How is that consolation?

We told everyone that
she was gonna introduce us.

We're gonna look like fools.

Guys,

this is not the end of the world.

Trish,

you and I are still getting a CHoFMA,

and I know you're gonna rock that speech.

- Am I?
- Yeah.

Of course, I am, because I've been waiting

for this moment my entire career,

and my mama didn't raise no coward.

Sadie and Lay Lay,

I know you're gonna electrify this crowd.

-Lay Lay!
-[Bryce] Hey!

That's the spirit!
They're gonna chant your name.

That's right. Lay Lay and I are ready.

I hope.

Guys,

we're Alexanders.

I know this isn't exactly
how we planned it, but,

it's still gonna be a magical night.

You're right, Dad.

This is going to be a magical night.

Don't mess it up.

I wasn't done yet.

It's gonna be a magical night

because I get to be on stage
with my family.

There's nothing better than that.

We got this. Alexanders on three.

You're introducing us. Get in here, too.

Yay, I'm so excited.

One, two, three.

-[all] Alexanders!
-Lay Lay!

♪ ♪

Lay Lay, I wish you could
say something other than...

-Lay Lay.
-Yup.

That's the one.

Sweet James Brown,
we've struck the mother lode.

It's all the swag bags.

Lay Lay, I'm gonna need you to use

your super speed powers
to get these samples

into those gift bags.

Whew.

She did it.

[hands fizzing]

Why are Lay Lay's hands
sh**ting fireworks?

That's just the magic
of the scheme coming together.

Lay Lay, you're amazing.

[buzzing noise]

[hiccups] No, girl.

You're amazing.

Lay Lay, you said something
other than "Lay Lay."

You got this.

Oh, no.

Those were Lay Lay's default phrases
when she was in my phone.

When we reset her, she must have
went back to factory mode.

Are you there? Lay Lay, it's me, Sadie.

Hi. I'm Lay Lay. What's your name?

What? No. You know me.

Nice to meet you, Nome. I'm Lay Lay.

Oh, no. Marky, this is not good.
She doesn't know who I am.

I'm sorry. I didn't mean to break her.

Whatever you say, superstar.

She's gone.

My best friend is gone.

When life gets you down,
turn that frown upside down.

You actually paid for an app
that talks like this?

Marky, you don't understand.

Lay Lay helped me with my confidence.

She helped me come out of my shell.

She's like the sister I never had.

Get your boot-scooting booty
on down to the Boot Barn,

where we've got the best prices in town.

Yee-haw.

Is that a commercial?

You didn't even get the ad-free version?

It wouldn't have been
financially responsible.

Ain't nothing to it but to do it, girl.

[announcer] Welcome
to the Cleveland Hall of Fame

Music Awards.

[cheers and applause]

Oh, this is bad.

We have to go on stage soon,
and everyone will find out

Lay Lay's secret.

Maybe no one will notice
something's off about Lay Lay?

Hola, amigos,

y vamos el Boots Barn.

Yee-haw.

Yeah. Someone's gonna notice.

Lay Lay, please, hear me.

You're a real teenage girl now.

You're not the avatar
for my positive affirmation app.

A smile goes with any outfit.

Look at her.

My best friend is broken.

Without her, I'm lost.

I'm sorry. I feel horrible.

I didn't mean for this to happen.

You trusted me with a secret,
and I took advantage.

I swear, I would do anything
to get Lay Lay back.

Wow, Marky,
that's really nice of you to say.

Of course, now, it doesn't matter,

because you destroyed
my best friend, but thanks.

[announcer] Welcome back to the CHoFMAs.

And now, the presentation
of Jingle Writers of the Year.

Hi. I'm Jasmine.

In just a minute,

you'll get to hear Trish
and Bryce's daughter Sadie

and her friend Lay Lay debut a new song.

But first, give it up for
the advertising songwriters of the year,

Bryce and Trish Alexander.

[applause]

Marky, we need to figure out
what we're going to do with Lay Lay.

She's still broken.

Boom. That's what I'm talking about.

[hiccups] Girl power.

Oh, man.

Lay Lay and I are supposed
to perform next, but if we do,

someone will figure out Lay Lay
is an avatar from my phone,

and then the men in black will show up,
and they'll do that thing

where they just stare at you
until you start talking.

And if you don't talk,
they'll offer you a stick of gum

and stare at you until you do talk.

And then, they'll take away
my best friend,

and all I'll have left is a stick of gum.

And it'll be winter mint,
which everyone knows

is the worst flavor of gum,
because it burns your tongue.

I'm going to be friendless
with a burning tongue.

[cheers and applause]

You've got this, babe.

Remember, confidence.

Get your Badu on.

[warm music playing]

[bongos playing]

[rhythmically] Wow.

Dreams really do come true.

Like the sky that is blue,

pride runs from my head to my feet.

Thank my mama for believing in me.

Mama, I took pride in my work,
like you said I could,

and now your little girl did it
like you said I should.

[cheers and applause]

Wait, I have to thank one more person.

Okay, then.

I'd like to thank my kindergarten teacher,
Mrs. Kreider.

Oh, and my first grade teacher,
Mrs. Weldon.

I got her through the stage fright.

I'm that good.

Yeah, but is she ever gonna stop?

No. She's on one.

They're about to put you guys on stage.

Lay Lay, if you can hear me in there,

please know I loved having you
be a part of my life.

You were the best bestie
anyone could ask for.

[hiccups] If you don't try,
you'll always wonder why.

Ugh, ever since those stupid hiccups,
she just hasn't been Lay Lay.

That's it.

Maybe if we cure the hiccups,
it will cure the glitch.

Okay, but how?

When someone has the hiccups,

you have to scare them, like this.

[yells]

Go big or go home.

That's not how you scare Lay Lay.

This is how you scare Lay Lay.

Girl, your shoes don't match your jacket.

[hiccups] The best way
to look good is to feel good.

Oh, no.

If hearing her outfit is wack
didn't scare her out of it, nothing will.

No, there is another way.

Get your boot-scooting booty on down...

Skip ad.

What are you doing with that InstaShave?

Ah!

[both] Ah!

What happened to your eyebrows?

Marky, your forehead so big,
now it's a five-head.

That was snark.

You're snarky again. Lay Lay's back.

I missed you so much.

Lay Lay, I'm sorry I overused your powers.

I won't do it again.
I love having you around.

I promise from now on,
your secret is safe with me.

Thanks, Marky. That means a lot.

[laughs]

I'm sorry. I can't.

Your face.

Right? We should, like,

project a movie on his forehead
or something.

[laughter]

Okay, okay. Laugh it up.

My eyebrows will grow back in...

four to six months?

What?

Who got a CHoFMA? Trish got a CHoFMA.

Who got a CHoFMA?

Trish got a CHoFMA.

Who got a CHoFMA? Trish got a CHoFMA.

Who's got a CHoFMA?

Trish got a CHoFMA. [laughs]

And to all the haters who said
it wouldn't happen,

uh, new phone, who dis?

Thank you, and remember to compost.

[cheers and applause]

And now, my creative partner,

and the man I love
would like to say something.

Watch big daddy Bryce bring it home.

I want to thank my...

[screams]

My husband would like to thank his mama.

Thank you, and good night.

So many people.

[warm music playing]

You ready to go out there
and k*ll it, Lay Lay?

Let's do this, Sadie. It's slay time.

Let's hear it for Trish
and Bryce Alexander.

[cheers and applause]

And to show how deep
the talent runs in this family,

please welcome their daughter Sadie
and her best friend Lay Lay.

[cheers and applause]

-[music playing]
-♪ If I dream it, I believe it ♪

♪ I'ma be it ♪

♪ If I dream it, I believe it, I'ma ♪

♪ They say effort beats talent any day ♪

♪ So I'ma work hard
Every single time I play ♪

♪ 'Cause haters gonna hate ♪

♪ It don't matter what they say ♪

♪ If you got big goals
Then you got to be brave ♪

♪ Living proof hard work pays off ♪

♪ I'ma follow in their footsteps
No days off ♪

♪ 'Cause I'm chasing dreams, zoom
Yeah, you see me making moves ♪

♪ Putting everything I got
Into everything I do ♪

♪ Because I know
If I see it, I'ma be it ♪

♪ I set my mind to my goals
And I believe it ♪

♪ And I set my goals high
And I try to reach them ♪

♪ I put the pedal to the metal
In achieving dreams ♪

-♪ I got big dreams ♪
-♪ Big dreams ♪

♪ Big dreams doing big things ♪

♪ Yeah, big ♪

♪ I'ma be whatever I want to be ♪

♪ You can do it
As long as you got a dream ♪

♪ If I dream it, I believe it
I'ma be it ♪

-♪ I'ma be it ♪
- ♪ If I dream it, I believe it ♪

-♪ I'ma be it ♪
-♪ I'ma be it ♪

♪ If I dream it
I believe it, I'ma be it ♪

-♪ I'ma be it ♪
-♪ I'ma be it ♪

♪ I'ma be it ♪

[cheers and applause]

We love you, Cleveland.

Yes, let's give it up one more time
for Trish and Bryce Alexander.

[cheers and applause]

Where's Marky? He should be out here too.

[all scream]

Boy, what did you do to your eyebrows?

InstaShave and a can-do attitude.

Just smile and wave, Marky.
Smile and wave.

♪ ♪

I have manifested literally

everything that I have in my life.

I kinda just talk to the universe.

One thing I have manifested
is my Nickelodeon deal,

my TV show,

youngest female rapper ever signed...

I said, who, me?

And my biggest thing
is not really about money.

To me, It's about who I influence.

♪ It's your girl Lay Lay ♪

Once I touch that mic,
there's no going back.

I'm not going anywhere but to the stage.

And that's life with that girl Lay Lay.

[cheers and applause]