01x13 - School Dance/Dad's Speech

[bunniefuu]

- [crows]

- ♪ Pony on the sixth floor, Pony in the bathroom ♪

♪ Pony in the kitchen, Pony on the school bus ♪

♪ Pony, Pony, Pony

♪ He's a funny-looking pony, never going slowly ♪

♪ When you got a Pony never feel lonely ♪

♪ Pony, Pony, Pony

- Pony!

- ♪ It's Pony! Pony! Pony! Pony! ♪

♪ It's Pony! Pony! Pony! Pony! ♪

♪ It's Pony! Pony! Pony! Pony! ♪

♪ It's Pony! ♪

- ANNIE: Pony.

- ♪

- "Principal Ramiro is proud to present

the annual Valentine's Day dance...tomorrow night?"

- ALL: [groan] - Yes!

Well, come on, you guys! Who doesn't love a school dance?

Everybody! [scatting]

- We don't have to take this. I say we all stay home.

- "The theme is...mandatory attendance."

- [groaning]

- We're required to go to a dance?

- What's she gonna do, grade us on it?

- "You will be graded." - [groaning]

- Just tell her you don't wanna do it.

- Are you kidding? She'd probably give us detention

just for asking, she lives for that dance.

- [gasps] Are ponies invited? - Are ponies ever invited?

- No. But sometimes ponies are there anyway.

- It's a school thing, so no.

I think you'll be hanging with Mom and Dad.

- Tomorrow night? Oh, your father's taking me out

for a romantic Valentine's Day meal.

- Are ponies invited? - No.

- But sometimes ponies are there a--

- No!

- Why is everyone so busy on Valentine's Day?

- Not everyone. If everyone was busy,

then Ramiro wouldn't make us-- that's it!

If Ramiro had Valentine's Day plans,

there wouldn't be a school dance!

All of our problems would be solved!

- Plans? Like a date? - Exactly!

Now, who's a good match for a lonely principal?

- [sniffing] - How about Mr. Pancks?

- ♪ - [chainsaw whirring]

- [whistling]

- Maybe not.

- Dave? - Nah.

- Hey, Pony. - Hi, Dave.

Mr. Underwood? - Nah.

- This guy? - [yawns]

- That's Dad. [groans]

We're never gonna find someone to take Ramiro

on a Valentine's date.

- Don't give up, Annie, love is right around the corner.

- BOTH: [scream]

- Oh, sorry, eh? Just getting this slippery fella

out of the crate.

- Sure, Mr. Gravlax. [gasps] Look who it is!

- ♪

- Principal Ramiro! What can I do for you?

- Hello, Mr. Gravlax.

I was wondering if you could spare some ice

for the school dance, and please, call me Penny.

- Ah, you betcha.

Anything for you, Principal Penny. Eh?

- [laughs]

- ♪

- Do you hear music?

- Pony, can you believe this?! I think she likes him!

Let's make this happen, come on.

Hey, Mr. Gravlax! So, uh, what are you doing

for Valentine's Day?

- Oh, yeah, I got a big date. - [sighing]

- With my fishing rod. - [gasping]

- Yeah, taking Dora out to sea.

- [sighing] - Dora's the name of m'boat.

- [gasps] You should ask Principal Ramiro out on a date.

- Oh, nah, I'm not that good at asking folks out on dates.

- Why do you say that?

- And please, call me Penny.

- Oh, you betcha, anything for you, Principal Penny. Eh?

- [laughs]

- Wanna go out with me?

- Lucky for you, Pony and I are experts.

- What do you know about dating?

- Ha! Might be quicker if you asked what don't I know

about dating.

- What don't you know about dating?

- Everything.

- You remember our first Valentine's, huh?

That was crazy. - Oh, yes, what a night.

We forgot our wallets

and had to run out of the restaurant!

I jumped on the back of your motorcycle and we rode off

so fast we ended up in a corn field...

That wasn't you. - No.

- Huh. What was our crazy night?

- You know, the--the mini golf.

That crazy game of mini golf.

- Oh, yes, yes. Yeah, no, that was so crazy.

[laughs] The--the windmill and the...bull.

- Agh. At least I remembered my wallet.

- Okay. There she is. Just go ask her.

- No, he can't do that.

Haven't you ever seen a romance movie?

It has to just happen.

Go bump into her, and then, when you're helping her

pick everything up, gaze into her eyes and ask her out.

- Okay, if you say so.

- [bump] - MS. RAMIRO: [yelps]

- ♪

- Move it along, buster!

- [whispering] Pony! We just need her to find a date

so she'll cancel the dance!

It doesn't have to be the fish guy.

- Yes, it does, that's how it works. Go get her!

- [cans falling]

- ♪

- [huffs]

- [blowing air]

- [pulley squeaking]

- I don't know about this, Pony.

- Trust me, Annie.

In all my vampire romance novels,

the vampire always gets the girl!

- Uh, kids, I gotta tell ya, this rope is giving me

quite the wedgie.

- Now glide!

"Glide like the fog glides across the marsh

on a dark October morning."

- When am I supposed to ask her out on a date?

- Yes, good, do that.

- [pulley squeaking]

- ♪

- [yelps]

- ♪

- [thud]

- Alright, buddy, you make sure it's your biggest bouquet,

for my special girl.

- Oh, this is so sweet of you, George.

- Oh, well, I seem to have forgotten my wallet.

Run! [panting]

Isn't this crazy?!

I feel so alive!

- [thud] - Ooh!

- He already paid for them earlier, didn't he?

- Why did you ask me to meet you here, Annie?

I've got a million and one things to do

to get ready for the dance.

- Ever hear of a grand gesture?

- Yes, of course, but what does that have to do with me?

- You'll see.

[coughs]

- I'm leaving. - No, no, no! Wait.

- [plane approaching]

- And here it is. Good ol' Pony.

- Huh? I haven't done anything yet.

- You said you were gonna do a grand gesture.

- I did. Look, we got chocolates.

- Huh. And why the net?

- So he can say...

- You're the catch of the day. - [gasps] Irresistible.

- If that's your grand gesture, then whose is that?

- ♪

- You want crazy, Helen? This is crazy!

- George?

- I don't even know how to land, how about that?

- [screams]

- ♪

- Now that was crazy.

- Crazy?! No, that was stupid!

[gasps] Where's the plane going now?!

- Huh? [gasps]

[screams]

- [plane crashes]

- You're the catch of the day.

- PONY: Yes!

- [hums]

- So, would you like to go on a date tonight?

- ♪

- No. - [disc scratching]

- I'm overseeing a school dance.

- PONY: Nobody wants to go to the dance!

- Really? - Well...um--

- They all hate it. - Pony, shh!

- Why didn't you tell me? - We, uh...I don't know.

- Then I'll cancel it.

- So, what do you say?

Would you like to go on a romantic boat ride?

- You know what, Mr. Gravlax? I think I'd like that very much.

- We did it! It's canceled!

I can't wait to tell the guys! We're gonna be heroes!

- ♪

- Uh, yeah, good job, Annie.

I'm glad I got this dumb flower.

- Yeah, stupid dance. Glad we're not doing that.

- Yeah, me too.

- No! Look at the shine on these shoes!

- [sparks dinging]

- But I don't understand.

I thought none of us wanted to go to the dance.

- Well, no, we didn't, but in a way, we did.

- I had a few moves I was thinking about trying out.

- I got a new tux.

- [exhales] I just ate a whole box of mints.

- [groans] You know what we have to do.

- Fine. I'll dance with you, Heston.

- No, Pony. Come on, everybody.

- ♪

- ANNIE AND PONY: [panting]

- [boat horn honking]

- Stop! Don't go! We made a mistake!

- We want you to put on the Valentine's Day dance!

- I'll do it! - ANNIE: Huh?

- Oh, come on, you told me you don't want to do it.

- We don't wanna do it, but it's kinda like

you don't wanna go to a scary movie, but you really do.

- Again and again! - I got a new tux!

- I got happy feet! - Jay looks great in his suit!

- Please! - Aah!

- Wanna go to the dance?

- SAILOR: I already said yes.

- Well, it looks like the dance is on!

- GEORGE: Sorry, Helen.

I guess it's just another un-crazy date with me.

- Oh, stop it.

Do you know how that crazy date ended?

We got caught and had to go back to the restaurant

and wash dishes.

- That doesn't sound romantic.

- It wasn't. It was awful.

You're all the excitement I need, George.

Come on, if we hurry up, we'll have time

for a round of mini golf.

- [gasps] - I love mini golf!

- ♪

- And those are just a few ways the nanotechnology my lab

is developing will revolutionize video games.

- [applause]

- Clara, your mom is so cool!

- Thank you, Mrs. Bornstein.

Who'd like to volunteer for tomorrow's parent presentation?

Thank you, Annie.

- Really? After last year? - What?

- Your mom brought in chickens and tried to get them

to do tricks. - Unsuccessfully.

- Oh, yeah. But this time, it's going to be different.

- Chickens!

- Not again, Mom, that's what you did last year.

- Well, I've got a new chicken this year.

Nobody's met Scrumpet. They'll love her.

Scrumpet, do your trick.

- [gasps] That's amazing!

How did you teach her to do that?!

Am I doing it right?

- That's not the trick. She's not doing it now.

But the day of the speech, she'll nail it.

- I think Dad should do it this year.

- Ooh, I don't know, Annie.

Your dad isn't the best public speaker.

- Okay, Dad, start anytime.

- I haven't started yet?

I guess I was saying it in my head. [nervous chuckle]

- Well, that's okay. Uh, just say it to us.

- ♪ - [chickens clucking]

- ♪

- Sorry, turnip, I'm just not very good

when people are looking at me.

- Look at me! Everybody! Anybody! Look at me!

You down there, look! It's me!

[continues yelling] - Oh, I know what to do.

The solution is--now, now, hear me out.

To be more like Pony! - PONY: [indistinct yelling]

- Annie, that's-- - A great idea?

- Insane. - But think about it.

Pony's got everything you need to give a great speech.

He never gets embarrassed, he never gets flustered--

- PONY: Why don't you come up here and say that?!

- He's really good at projecting his voice.

- Hmm. Why is this so important to you?

- Because I'm so proud of you!

- In other words, either it's me,

or Mom and her chickens.

- [laughs]

- So how is being like Pony going to help?

- You need to learn how to be carefree and relaxed.

Just watch.

- [humming]

- ♪

- Ugh.

Hey, what's this taste like? I can't figure it out.

- Look how comfortable he is talking to people,

even people he doesn't know.

- Wait, stop, give it just a quick taste.

Stop being so difficult.

- I'm not sure I learned anything from that.

- Well, he just got off to a bad start.

- Hello, madam. - Oh, this is going to be great.

Nobody lays on charm like Pony.

- I love your hat.

- Thank you. Aren't you a nice pony?

- Yes, I am.

- To give a good speech, you need to win people over.

Charm them.

Now it's your turn.

- Guess that sounds simple enough.

Hmm. Here goes. [exhales]

Hello, madam--uh, or sir. I love your hat!

- What are you?! Some kind of wise guy?!

Are you looking for a fight?! [growls]

- We need to focus on talking in front of a group.

Watch Pony.

- What do you get when you cross a woodpecker

with a messenger pigeon?

A weird-looking bird. [laughs]

- They didn't laugh. - Because they're pigeons.

We'll work our way up to people later.

- Please welcome a good friend and a great dad: George Bramley!

- [applause]

- Uh, hello, I'm here to tell you about farming!

- [booing]

- I didn't know pigeons boo.

- Only when they're bored. Try a joke.

- Uh...why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing. [laughs]

- [laughs]

- [can clanking] - What?!

At least that one had a punch line.

Oh, I give up, I'm going home.

- But Dad, wait. You barely even tried.

Oh, hi, Henrietta.

- Should be an interesting day at school tomorrow.

- [groans]

- Oh, there you are, Scrumpet's been practicing

all day.

Haven't you?

Scrumpet, stay.

Ta-da!

- This chicken's gonna be a star!

- Sorry, Mom, it's Dad's turn.

- Ugh, I just think there should be a plan B

in case your father doesn't come through.

- Aw. I don't think Dad is gonna come through.

I guess we'll just say nobody could come.

Ugh, that's almost as humiliating as chicken tricks.

I can't believe Dad's going to let me down.

- I won't let you down, Annie.

Come on, Pony, teach me how to be you.

- Pony panic, go! Jump! Jump! Jump! Don't jump!

- [thud]

- Come on, Dad! Chase those ducks!

- ♪

- Ready? Go!

- ♪

- [gasps]

- [imitating rooster crowing] - [rooster crowing]

- MAN: Be quiet out there! - [dog barking]

- I'm getting the landlord!

- [laughing]

- And he did everything you said?!

- Of course, I'm a great tutor.

- That's great. I hope it works.

- GEORGE: Knock-knock. - Hi, Dad.

Come to say goodnight?

- Uh-uh. I came to have fun!

- ♪

- PONY: Wooh, dance party!

- ♪

- This is amazing! He's you!

- He's confident, carefree, and fun!

- I am Pony!

- [groaning]

- Do you need to go over your speech?

- Nah, I got this.

- Okay, if you say so.

Tomorrow's going to be great! I can tell.

- GEORGE: Goodnight, turnip. Goodnight, Pony.

- Goodnight.

- Goodnight, Dad.

- [birds chirping]

- PONY: [snoring] - [yawns]

[gasps]

- [snoring]

- Morning, Mom. Seen Dad?

- I thought he was with you guys.

He didn't do his morning chores.

- But what about his speech today?

- There's nothing to worry about. He's me.

And I never give you any reason to worry.

- We have to find him.

Hmm, he had breakfast.

- Agh, he got the coupon.

- Dad is you, right? What would you do?

- Collect coupons and get a free scooter.

- ♪

- He's been here. - How can we be sure?

- ♪

- Okay. You've gotten your free scooter,

where would you ride it? The skate park?

- No.

Hi, Dave. - Hey, Pony.

- ANNIE: Really? - Any excuse to come down here.

- Look!

We have to find him.

It's almost time for school.

- Don't worry, he's me. - That's right!

You always come through in the end,

and you always make things better.

So, what happens next?

- Well, after I fall in the sewer,

I float downstream, go over a waterfall,

and end up in the harbor.

Then I just grab a bulldozer and drive it straight to school.

- So we just have to get to school!

[sighs] It'll all work out.

- Are you sure your father's coming?

- Yeah, he'll be here any second.

He'll be driving up in that dozer at the count of three.

One. Two-- - GERRY: You're wrong, Annie.

- What? He's not coming? - No, he is,

but not on a bulldozer. [screams]

- [grunts]

[clears throat]

- What an entrance.

- Hiya, kids. Who wants to hear

a thing or two about farming?

- ALL: [cheering]

- How do you think it's going?

- I've taught him everything I know.

- How much do you actually know about farming?

- Nothing.

- [clock ticking]

- It's hard to believe,

but this is even worse than last year.

- [groans]

- Mr. Bramley. - Ooh, what's this? A pointer?!

Pointy, pointy, pointy, pointer. Pointy point.

You!

I challenge you to a duel. - [yelps]

- KIDS: [laughing]

- Ah. Yes! - HESTON: Oh. [nervous laughter]

- GEORGE: [grunts]

- ♪

- Pointy, pointy. - Mr. Bramley!

Come down from there!

- Don't worry, Annie. I'll do the speech.

Plan B right here.

- Please, Mom, I said no chickens.

- And I listened. This is all new!

They're ducks!

- [ducks quacking] - Ducks!

- Ducks!

- [ducks quacking]

- [indistinct chatter]

- [sighs] That was a disaster.

I'm so embarrassed.

Where is Dad now?

- Mom took him home and put him to bed.

She says he'll be back to his old self

after he gets some rest.

- [groans] Why did this happen?

You always make things better.

- I do. Except for this time.

- Ugh, please don't say anything, I feel bad enough.

- About what? I owe you an apology.

I loved your dad's speech. So inspiring.

Now I know what I wanna be.

- A farmer? - No way.

I wanna be an Internet sensation like your dad.

His video's got, like, a zillion hits.

- Pointy.

- I told you I always make things better!

- ♪

♪

♪♪

- ♪