01x16 - Cloud of the Month/A. Plumber

[bunniefuu]

- * Once there was a captain *

* He was a serious dude *

* Well he crashed into a mountain *

* Man it lightened the mood *

* Speaking of lightening the mood *

* Speaking of thunderous joy *

* In comes Parker J, a raincloud *

* Looking for new employ *

* The beardful captain said, "Hey!" *

* The cheerful raincloud said, "Hi!" *

* They started working together *

* What a magical sight *

* The Middlemost Post, ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh *

* The Middlemost Post *

* Ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh *

[upbeat music]

* *

- A little more to the left. [wood scraping]

A smidgen to the right. [wood scraping]

Hmm.

Down a little. [wood scraping]

There. Perfect.

- Think we should've smiled?

- I was smiling.

- Oh.

- Kidding. Ha.

- [laughs] Good one, Lily!

- Thanks for your help around the store today, Parker.

If you worked for me, you'd be Employee of the Month.

- What's Employee of the Month?

- It's a reward that a boss gives an employee

to recognize their hard work,

positive attitude, and great ideas,

something I think you have in spades--

Parker?

- I don't know, Parker.

I just never thought we needed an Employee of the Month.

Why fix something that's not broken?

- So you don't think I work hard,

have a positive attitude, or have great ideas?

- Oh well, of course, I do.

- But not enough to be Employee of the Month.

[electricity sizzles] I get it, I get it.

- [stutters] Hold on there.

We don't have Employee of the Month

because we have something better.

- Really? What is it?

- Uh--it--um it's called--

a-ha!

Cloud of the Month! Yup. That's it.

Guess what, kiddo? You just got it.

- [gasps] I did?

[fireworks exploding]

- Yup.

[copy machine whirring]

- [gasps] Wow!

Angus, I'll be the best Cloud of the Month you've ever had.

- Well, you're the only cloud. [clears throat]

I am sure you will be, buddy.

[upbeat music]

[doorbell chimes like a sheep]

Here's your mail, miss.

- Angus, aren't you going to tell her?

- Huh? Oh, right. [chuckles]

My good pal Parker here just made Cloud of the Month.

- Mm-hmm! Yup!

I'm pretty proud of myself, too.

[lock clicks]

* *

Angus, mind if I deliver this one solo?

You know, because I'm Cloud of the Month and all?

- Deliver away.

* *

What's Parker doing?

[duck quacks]

- Hi, I just delivered your mail.

I thought you'd like to know

I'm actually Cloud of the Month,

so this is kind of a big deal for me.

Oh, and for you.

[water bubbling]

[laughs]

[upbeat musical flourish]

Hm. Look at us. Just a couple of hardworking postal workers

at the top of their game.

Now that I'm COTM-- - COT what now?

- Cloud of the Month. - Oh, right.

- As COTM, I'd love to run a few ideas by you.

Things that might, you know, help MMP run more efficiently.

- I'm sure your ideas are great, kiddo.

I'd love to hear all about them.

Maybe some other time.

- You got it, boss.

[rooster crowing]

- [snoring]

[alarm rings] - Wake up, fool.

- [gasps] I'm up!

Rise and shine, little nimbus. [yawns]

We got a lot of work to do.

Hmm? Parker?

* *

- Good morning, Angus.

- Parker, what are you doing up so early?

- Eh, you know what they say.

The early worm catches a bird because birds are...

the worst.

- [squawks]

- And you made breakfast. - Sure did.

And packed Russell with all of today's mail already

so we can get an early jump on delivery.

- [guttural grunt]

- Oh, I'm impressed.

- Well, they don't just give Cloud of the Month

to just anyone, boss.

I even took the liberty to steam wash your work shirt.

- What is that?

- Our new uniform.

Pretty stylish, right?

Just one of many ideas I have

to change things up around here.

We'll be twinsies!

- Parker, it's great seeing you take initiative and all,

but I think you misunderstood a few things.

- Well, yesterday I told you

I had a lot of ideas and you said,

"Parker, I'm sure your ideas are great, kiddo."

Did you not mean it? Are my ideas not great?

[horse whinnies]

- [groans] Well, I guess it won't hurt to give it a try.

- Whoo-hoo!

* *

Delivery, Middlemost Post.

- Huh?

[fabric stretching]

[chuckles]

- Don't even say it, Terri.

- [chuckling] Say what?

[laughing] - [sighs]

- What's that? - My performance reviews.

- Huh. Kiddo, don't worry about your performance.

You're doing great.

- Oh, it's not for me. It's for you.

- You're reviewing myperformance?

- Just because I'm Cloud of the Month this month

doesn't mean you can't be next month.

Although you do have stiff competition.

[pig snorts]

- You're kidding!

[dramatic music]

What did you write about me?

- That you did an awesome job. - Nice!

- Although it wouldn't hurt to smile more, big guy.

[balloon inflating]

- [growls]

Have a good day.

[soft upbeat music]

- [tutting]

- What? I smiled.

- Your mouth smiled, but your heart frowned.

* *

- What is taking so long?

- Hold tight. [chuckles]

Your mail's in here someplace.

- I'm missing my tee time.

- Ooh, I love tea! What kind?

Passion fruit? Chamomile?

Oolong?

- The golf kind.

- Parker, what did you do in here?

All the packages are out of order.

- As Cloud of the Month,

I took the initiative to reorganize Russell.

- You did what now?

- I thought our filing system was a bit out of date,

so I updated it and added new features to our girl here.

I call it the Russell Unified Sorting System

also known as the RUSS.

One of my many ideas you said would be great.

[balloon inflating]

- You said that? - Well, not exactly.

- I even password-protected Russell

so no one can steal the mail.

That's weird. [groans]

Maybe it's case-sensitive.

- System armed. Countdown.

Five, four, three... [all screaming]

- Parker, slow down. What's the big hurry?

- I just want to get back to the office ASAP.

Got a lot of brilliant ideas brewing up here.

You know, the mind never stops.

You know the old saying.

"Time is mail." [chuckles]

- I don't think that's a saying at all.

- See you back at the ship.

- What's gotten into PJC?

- Ms. Pam,

have you ever tried to do something nice for someone,

but then that nice thing you did

went straight to their head?

- No.

- [sighs] Russell, I think it's time

we have a heart-to-heart with Parker.

- [meows]

- Ugh, this won't be easy.

Hey, kiddo. We need to ta--

[dramatic music] What?

What?

* *

[soft upbeat music playing]

Parker, are you in there?

* *

- Angus, my guy. Did you have an appointment?

- Appointment?

- Burt will be more than happy to add you to the books.

[chortles]

- How about now?

* *

- [sighs]

Okay. What's on your mind, big guy?

- [sighs] Parker, ever since you got Cloud of the Month,

you've been acting-- - Ah, ah, ah, ah!

[shushes]

- You've been acting-- - Ah-ta-ta-ta-ta!

- You've been act--

- Burt, hold my calls, please.

You were saying?

- Winning Cloud the Month has given you a big head, Parker.

- I don't see it.

- Okay. That's it.

I'm going to sh**t you straight, kiddo,

but you're not gonna like it.

- Lemme stop you there, Angus.

I'm actually glad you stopped by

because I've been meaning to sh**t you straight, too.

[sighs]

You know, this sort of thing is never easy.

- What? What is happening right now?

- I'm afraid. I'm gonna have to let you go.

- You're f*ring me?

- Your performance reviews have been less than stellar.

I think your skills would be best applied someplace else.

[tea kettle whistling] - [growling]

- You can take Burt on the way out

and fill them up with your personal belongings.

[dramatic music]

* *

- [bellows]

* *

- [gasps]

My reward! Burt, call security!

- Burt, put that phone down!

Parker, I am your boss. A boss is a real thing.

Not like Cloud of the Month, which is not a real thing.

- Sure it is. It says so on the door.

- I made it up!

There's no such thing as Cloud of the Month!

Think about it!

You're the only cloud on the entire mountain, Parker!

Who else would win it?

[balloon pops] - [stuttering]

Oh, Parker. I'm sorry, kiddo.

I was only trying to encourage you.

- Uh-uh.

- Just because it was fake

doesn't mean I don't think you work hard.

- Can I go now, Angus?

I'd like to be alone if that's all right.

- [sighs] Sure, kiddo.

[downbeat music]

* *

Oh, Angus. You really blew it this time.

Hmm?

Well, I'll be.

Parker, did you come up with this idea?

- Yeah, that's stinker's mine, all right.

I'll throw it away with the others.

- No, you won't.

I may not agree with all your ideas, but this one,

oh-ho-ho, is a real winner, kiddo.

- Is it? - You betcha.

See, you don't need some stupid title like Cloud of the Month.

You're Cloud of the Month every month in my eyes.

- Oh! Thanks, Angus!

- Now let's go out and try your awesome idea.

[upbeat music]

* *

- Package for you, Mr. Short.

Everyone gets a free piece of toast with their mail.

- It was Parker's great idea.

- Hey, they're everywhere!

Make it stop, make it stop! Stop it!

[raptor shrieks] - [screams]

- We should probably go.

- Great idea, kiddo. Great idea.

[suspenseful jazz music]

* *

- Welcome back to another installment of "Sink or Swim"

with Parker and Russell.

Will this hairbrush sink or will it swim?

[upbeat music]

[gasps]

Sink. Bold choice.

It swims! [cheers and applause]

My turn! What about watermelon?

Hmm, this is a tough one.

I say it swims.

It swims! I win!

[cheers and applause]

Ah, don't be too hard on yourself.

You know, I have an eye for these things.

[water gurgling]

No!

[straining]

[metallic bashing]

[rumbling]

[sheep bleats]

[dramatic music]

* *

Oh, my cloud. I broke the bathtub.

- [knock at door] Parker, you in there?

- Hey, Angus, what's up?

- I was going to make myself a nice, sudsy bubble bath.

[rubber ducky squeaks]

- You talking about the bathtub in here?

- Well, last I checked, kiddo, it's the only tub we got.

[faucet squeaks] Huh.

The hot water's not working.

Parker, do you know anything about this?

- Admit nothing, kid! This will all blow over!

- But Parker, you'd be lying to your best friend.

And lying is not cool.

- Good cloud makes a good-- where'd Good Cloud go?

- Uh, dude had to leave.

- [screaming]

- You didn't see nothing. - Parker?

- I don't know what happened in there, Angus.

- Looks like I have some work to do.

Let's get to plumbing!

[metallic noises]

- This is bad, girl. Real bad.

Angus is gonna find that watermelon,

then he's gonna know it's me

because my cloud fingerprints will be all over it.

- [adorable voice] I'm guilty!

- Ah!

The "Somewhere Pages?" Great idea, girl.

We'll hire an Angus look-a-like,

replace our Angus with fake Angus,

then real Angus will never find out what we did.

Oh, hiring a plumber works too.

[line trilling] Hi, is this A. Plumber?

Can you fix my bathtub but not tell my boss

what broke the bathtub in the first place?

- Sure.

All I need is your address and I'll be there in a jiff.

Mm-hmm.

Top of mountain. Ciao.

We're in, sir. It worked!

- [chuckles] Fools!

- And they have no idea we cut the water supply to the ship.

- That's because my plan is genius, Ryan.

Now, to phase two of the genius plan.

Sabotage the "Steadfast."

Disguised as a plumber,

you'll make your way to the bowels

of that wooden eyesore they call a ship.

Once there, locate the panel to the main water supply.

- Then what do I do, sir? - Sabotage!

Rearrange the pipes, pull all the levers.

Really mess it all up, Ryan. Mess it up good.

When the sabotage is complete,

I'll release the water back into the ship,

blowing it off the mountain once and for all!

[cackles]

- You know, my father was quite the hand--

- Don't care, Ryan. Don't care.

[knock at door]

- Oh, hello. My name is Ry--

co--Rocco. [chuckles] Si.

[Italian accent] Someone call a plumber?

- A plumber?

I'm sorry. You have the wrong ship.

- I called him, Angus. - Well what'd you do that for?

A captain always fixes his own ship, Parker.

That's official sea law.

- I'm sorry, Angus. I was only trying to help

because--because you're my best bud in the whole world.

- I appreciate that kiddo,

but I got this whole plumbing problem under control.

You can trust me on that.

[dramatic music]

Okay, maybe I got a little in over my head.

- No problemo, I can fix it. - [gasps] You can?

- Well, it looks like the problem

is your main water line.

I need to go below the deck and take a look.

- Angus, maybe it's time to let this one go

for the good of the ship.

What do you say, big guy? - Um.

- You made a wise decision, sir.

- Sir? Call me Angus.

- Really? - It is my name.

- Oh, okay, sir.

I mean Angus.

[suspenseful jazz music]

- Ryan! Where are you? Ryan!

- Here, sir. And call me Rocco.

- Absolutely not.

- I have successfully made it into the belly of the beast.

- Excellent. Everything is working as planned.

Commence the sabotage.

- Uh-huh. Yeah.

Sabota--[screams]

Owwie.

- It's awfully quiet down there.

Maybe I should offer my help. - No!

I mean, Rocco looked like a really good plumber, Angus.

I'm sure he can handle this on his own.

- I don't know. His toolbox seemed awfully small.

- Yes, but his mustache was huge.

- Ooh, that's a solid point.

- Whew. It's working, girl.

That plumber is gonna fix everything

and Angus will never know what we did.

Okay. What I did. [thud]

- Angus.

- Hey, how come "blinky" isn't blinking?

- I fixed it.

Sorry if I overstepped my bounds,

but I noticed a few repairs done here and there

that needed attending to, so--

- You just plowed ahead and fixed them on your own

without even asking if it was okay?

- Um, a-kinda, sir. [whimpers]

- I told you. Call me Angus.

- [sighs]

- What do you say we go back upstairs?

You know, upstairs is fun, fun, fun, fun, fun.

It's like so much fun.

- So what do you got going on here?

- I'd be happy to show you.

If you want, we can fix it together.

- Together? - Together?

I'll grab my tool belt! Be right back.

[giggling]

- [gasps]

[dramatic radical 's music]

* *

[metallic ratcheting]

* *

- [gasps]

- [giggles]

* *

- What could he possibly be doing that is taking so long?

[towels snapping]

Ryan! - I'm on it, sir.

[yelps and farts]

[giggles]

- You see that right there?

That right there is some serious stucco work

right there.

- Ryan, can you hear--

* *

- Okay.

Now that you fixed the garbage disposal,

which I think was never broken,

how about we let Rocco finish fixing the bathtub.

- Absolutely, Parker.

Right after we take a little break.

- A break? Now?

No, I don't think a break is a good idea.

- Wow. You get breaks around here?

- Well, there's nothing wrong with rewarding, hard work.

Your boss doesn't give you breaks?

- He says that's what sleeping is for,

which I'm also not allowed to do.

- No offense, but your boss sounds like a real jerk face.

[shimmering tone]

I'll grab us some seltzers.

[pounding on door]

- [groans] I'll get it.

- Hello. I am the boss of A. Plumber. I--

- Oh, no! Rocco's boss is here, Russell.

This can't be good.

It's never good when a boss shows up!

- Oh, ah, there he is now.

- Well, girl, it's over. I'm cooked.

Angus is gonna find out that I broke the bathtub

and he'll want me to move out immediately.

I'll save him the time.

[wailing] I love you, Russell.

- Hello, Rocco.

- Ice cold seltzer.

Hey, who's this guy?

- I'm Rocco's boss.

Afraid he is needed on another job.

You can go now, Rocco. I'll finish this.

- It's been a real pleasure, Angus.

I mean, sir.

- You take care of yourself now.

- I will.

Oops, I almost forgot.

Here is your putty Kn*fe.

- Buddy, why don't you keep the putty Kn*fe?

- Really?

[heartfelt piano music]

- Okay, Rocco.

It's time to go.

b*at it, Ryan.

- [sniffling]

- Oh, what's wrong?

- I've been keeping a secret

from my best bud in the whole world

and I feel horrible about it.

- I know exactly how you feel.

- You play Sink or Swim with your pet walrus

and got a watermelon stuck in the drain

and then your boss couldn't take a bath,

and then you got in big trouble, big, big, big trouble,

and you had to call a plumber?

- No. Did you?

- I did!

And I lied about it!

- Pull this, twist that,

break that, push here.

Arrivederci ship,

it was nice knowing you.

[cackles]

[metal creaking]

Uh-oh.

- Mm, stupid bathtub.

[shouts]

- Hey, Parker, I know you think your watermelon

is what caused your plumbing problem,

but I can tell you with certainty it was not.

- How do you know?

- Because I've been keeping a secret

from some pretty good buds too,

and I think it's time I come clean,

like you did.

[dramatic music]

[loud boom]

- Look, it's my watermelon!

- Rocco!

- And your boss.

- Oh, oops, gotta run. Coming, sir.

- [screaming]

- Look who just fixed the bathtub.

[sputters] This guy.

- Nice job, Angus.

Guess we didn't need that plumber after all.

- Ah, plumber schlumer, am I right?

[heartfelt music]

- Angus!

There's still a hole in the bathroom.

- Uh, I can fix that.

[plucky music]

* *