- * Once there was a captain *
* He was a serious dude *
* Well he crashed into a mountain *
* Man it lightened the mood *
* Speaking of lightening the mood *
* Speaking of thunderous joy *
* In comes Parker J, a raincloud *
* Looking for new employ *
* The beardful captain said, "Hey!" *
* The cheerful raincloud said, "Hi!" *
* They started working together *
* What a magical sight *
* The Middlemost Post, ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh *
* The Middlemost Post *
* Ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh *
[dramatic music]
* *
- Who wants fish nuggets fresh from the oven?
- [chattering]
- [laughs] Here you go, girl.
Now remember, don't eat them too fast.
[sighs]
Not gonna work, girl.
- Angus!
Come here, you gotta see this!
- Parker, I'm eating.
- It's amazing!
- I'm sure it is. Can it wait?
- No, hurry up!
- Can you come here and show me?
- It won't take long, I promise!
- I just sat down.
- Okay, but you're gonna hate yourself if you don't see this.
- You know I don't like to go inside Russell.
It's one of the reasons I hired you, so you can do it.
- All I'm saying is,
it might be the single biggest regret of your entire life.
- Fine. - Whoo!
Don't forget to sign Russell's terms and conditions
before you come down, big guy.
- "Russell takes no responsibility"...
yeah, yeah, "shirt stains," hm, "lost wallet,"
"legal action," blah, blah.
Yech. Okay, here I come.
Gosh, how did I do this again?
- Hurry, Angus!
- Ugh, ooh, blech.
[grunting]
Ahh!
[crash]
[upbeat music]
Ah, gross, gross, gross!
Oof!
Oh, that was horrible. Now what's all the fuss about?
- Oh, hey, what's up, dude? Check this out.
- Greeting and salutations, Angus.
- This is what you wanted to show me?
- No, it's what Sir Hands-a-lot wanted to show you.
- I am the right hand of the king.
- Hello! I'm King Fingers.
- Parker, you know I get anxious inside Russell.
I'm claustrophobic, which means
tight spaces give me the willy-nillies.
Still, my brain knows we're inside a walrus,
and my brain doesn't like it.
Goodbye.
Hey, let me out of here! Russell, what's going on?
- It's okay, Angus.
Russell is taking a nap, that's all.
She likes to shut it down when she snoozes.
- [snores] - Oh, she's snoring!
[lullaby playing]
How cute.
- Cute left long ago, Parker. I want out of here, please!
- No problem, big guy.
I know just how to wake Russell up.
Russell, wake up! Wake up!
- [groans] - Don't worry.
I have other ways.
- Wake up, wake up, wake up.
[lightning zapping]
- [snores]
[rock music]
- Tickle, tickle, tickle, tickle.
Tickle, tickle, tickle.
- The walls are closing in, Parker.
They're closing in!
[upbeat music]
Ahh! Get me out of here!
I can't breathe! Somebody help!
- It's okay, Angus. Russell never sleeps too long.
She'll be up before you know it,
and everything will be right back to normal.
- Really?
- Like a wise man once said,
"You betcha, kiddo!"
- [sighs] Okay.
You're right, kiddo. No need to panic.
- Unless... - Unless what?
- Russell does go into a pretty beefy food coma
after eating her favorite snack.
both: Fish nuggets!
- She can sleep for hours
and hours and hours after eating delicious fish nugs.
- Parker, I just fed Russell a whole plate of fish nuggets.
- Ooh, that's not good. I mean, it's fine.
You're fine, we're fine. Everything's fine.
Lucky for you, this is not the only way out of Russell,
if you know what I mean.
- Ew. - Not that way, Angus.
Wow, really? Come on!
Russell has a secret side door. That's what I meant.
Follow me! - Follow you in there?
- Only if you want to get out of Russell!
Lots of good times down here in Russell.
Burt and I formed our first Tum-Tum Club right over there.
You know the first rule of Tum-Tum Club?
- Hopefully it's not talk about Tum-Tum Club.
- Nope, it's bring candy. Whoo-hoo!
- Parker, you sure there's a secret exit inside Russell?
- Absolutely, it's right before the pool of pudding
and right after Bean Bag Alley.
If you've reached the Trampoline Farm,
you've gone too far.
Wait, no, the pool of pudding was red tagged and shut down.
Too much pudding, they said, not enough pool,
as if that was a thing.
- Parker, this is serious!
What in the world?
[dramatic music]
* *
How come I look so...
- Whoa, you look old!
- I know, but why?
- It's probably because of WST.
- What's WST? - Walrus Stomach Time.
Humans age super fast the longer they're inside a walrus.
Yep, look at that time fly.
- You knew about this? - Of course.
It's all explained in Russell's terms and conditions.
You read that, right?
- Yeah, kind of, sort of.
No, 'cause nobody reads those!
- Angus! - Parker, I need you to focus.
And I need you to get me out of Russell
before I get any older.
- Boy, your breath smells really bad.
We're getting close, Angus.
[soft music]
* *
- Ooh, free samples.
* *
- Just a little further, big guy.
* *
Almost there!
- Parker, I think we've been here before.
- I don't think so, Angus.
- We just saw all of this, didn't we?
- No, no, memory is one
of the first things to go when you get older.
- Now we've definitely been here before.
- No, no, memory is one
of the first things to go when you get older.
- Parker, we're going in circles!
[tires screech] - Oof!
- Huh, look at that. We are!
Come on, Angus, no time to rest.
- No, I'm done.
I got nothing left, kiddo.
Just let old Angus be.
- What do you mean?
- Parker, you know what happens
when someone keeps getting older, right?
- Uh-huh, they start calling you "sport"
and eat dinner when it's really time for lunch.
- And after they're all done
getting older, they, you know...
- Take a nap?
- Take a long nap, buddy, a real long nap.
- Longer than Russell's? - Uh-huh.
It's the kind of nap where before I fall asleep,
I hand you the keys to the Steadfast
and tell you to take good care of her because she's yours now.
- That nap sounds like it'll last forever.
- Now you're getting it, sport.
- No, don't take a nap, Angus! Oh, this is all my fault!
- No, don't blame yourself, Parker.
If there's anyone to blame,
it's Sir Hands-a-lot and King Fingers.
- [grumbles] They'll pay for this.
* *
- It's happening, Parker. I see the light.
- So do I, so do I.
Wait! Why do I see it?
Am I taking a long nap, too? Oh, no!
I have too many places to see, too many lives to brighten.
I can't nap now! It's not fair!
* *
- Hey, Angus. Hey, Parker.
- Lily?
- Hi, Lily. - Are you an angel, Lily?
- I don't think so.
I came by the ship to see if Parker wanted to hang out,
but no one was around.
Then I heard what sounded like someone complaining
inside Russell, and I figured it was Angus.
- What?
- How did you get inside Russell?
Did you find the secret side door?
- Uh, Russell doesn't have a secret side door, Parker.
You're thinking of my shop. - What?
- My shop has a secret side door.
You helped me install it.
- Ooh, right. - Hold on a minute.
If you're inside Russell, that means Russell is awake!
- She was when I got there. - Whoo-hoo!
[coughs]
I can finally get out of here, and not a moment too soon.
- I hope you don't mind, but Russell looked hungry.
So I gave her the rest of your fish nuggets.
both: Fish nuggets!
- Uh-oh. - [grumbles]
- We gotta get out of here before she falls asleep again!
Ahh! - Ahh!
- [yawns]
- It's too late. - It's never too late!
[dramatic music]
Hold on, buddy! I'm getting you out of here!
- Can I help?
- That'd be great, Lily. Thanks.
Ahh!
* *
both: Fish nuggets!
- Ahh!
Ahh!
- Ahh. - Ahh!
- [snoring]
* *
- Hurry!
- Almost there!
* *
- [yawns]
- Ahh!
* *
- We made it! - Hooray.
- Am I still old? - Nope.
I mean, you're old, but just your normal old.
- Whoo-hoo-hoo!
That's the last time I'm ever going inside Russell,
that's for sure.
No more Walrus Stomach Time for me.
I'll stick to regular good old fashioned normal time.
Aw, no, Parker, I lost my watch inside Russell.
Could you be a pal and go--
- Parker!
[upbeat music]
Ah, shipwreck.
[upbeat electronic music]
* *
[relaxed music]
- Lily, quick! I need your help!
- What is it, Parker?
- I dropped something really,
really important down Old Stinkhole.
- What did you drop?
- Angus.
[wind whistling]
* *
Angus! [echoing]
Cool.
- That is cool. Let me try.
Angus!
- I don't see the big guy anywhere.
This is bad, Lily, real bad. I got to find my best bud!
- Don't worry, Parker, I'm sure Angus--
[echoing] Angus, Angus, Angus.
Is around here somewhere,
probably down that really dark and horrifying tunnel.
- Oh, no!
- [humming]
- Hey! Where did you get that beanie?
- You want it? Take it, it's yours.
I hate it. - I don't want the beanie.
I want the Angus that wore the beanie.
- Angus?
- Big guy, beard, kind of goofy.
- You mean the one from above,
he of heavy top and skinny legs.
- That's him, awesome!
- Your friend is lost forever, imprisoned by the Worm King,
I'm afraid.
The Worm King takes all.
- Looks like we got ahead of ourselves on that "awesome."
We gotta rescue Angus.
We can't the Worm King take him!
- Then it's an epic quest you seek,
for only the brave venture into the Tunnel of Turmoil!
Turmoil, turmoil, turmoil.
Moil, moil, moil.
You'll need supplies to survive.
Armor must be sought, weapons acquired, goods obtained.
Otherwise you'll have no chance against the Worm King.
- Farts, I left all that stuff at home.
- Fear not, quest seekers, for Old Stinkhole
has more than one hole.
You'll find everything you need in there
Go hither and stock up for your adventure.
- Whoo-hoo!
- Tell them Cave Dweller number one sent you!
If I refer five people, I get a free boomerang.
They're not gonna tell them.
* *
- [laughs]
* *
- Whoo-hoo! We'll take it!
* *
What's that one do?
- That one makes you soft and fluffy.
- Hmm, okay, and that one?
- The ability to float. - Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, and that one?
- Shape-shift into anything you want.
- Get out of here!
Who wouldn't want to do all that?
I'll take all three.
* *
- One more time.
If for some reason you get hurt,
eat a small turkey leg to restore your health.
If it looks like your days are numbered, ooh,
you're gonna want to bring out the Big Gobbler.
- [gasps] - Wow.
* *
- [laughing] Hy-ah!
- Look at me!
- [grunting]
Yah!
* *
- Huff, huff...
- I did not expect this quest-- - Huff, huff...
- To have so many hills. - Huff.
Me, huff, either.
- We'll never save Angus at this pace.
- We've gone too far, huff, to turn back now.
Farts.
- You thinking what I'm thinking?
- [sighs]
- Why did we get all those things again?
- I have no idea.
* *
- [gasps]
* *
- Maybe we should head back and see
if we missed an easier tunnel.
- Right behind you.
- Hey, what's the deal?
[grunting]
Looks like there's no going back.
We'll have to go this way if we're gonna rescue Angus.
- We can do it, Parker, I know we can.
All we have to do is be extra careful and take our time.
both: Ah!
- Run for it, Lily!
* *
- Jump, jump, jump, jump, jump.
- Whoa, ah!
* *
- Yum!
- Extra butter!
- Ahh!
- Butter Ball!
- Cool, whee!
Ahh!
* *
[both screaming]
- Any ideas?
- It appears the laser blasts three times,
stops, then blasts again.
All we have to do is time our jump
when the laser is not blasting.
- Great idea, Lily!
- We'll jump on the count of three.
One, two--
- How long after you say three do we jump?
- Hmm, that's a good question.
I'd say somewhere between "just after" and "soon after."
- Okay, let's do this! - One, two--
- Three!
- You're toast!
- Parker!
- Ahh!
- Are you okay? - I feel great.
In fact, I'm feel invincible,
like I can take on any and all...
nope, it's gone.
I feel normal.
We did it! - We sure did.
- [cackling]
- Who's this guy?
- I don't know, but he's blocking our only way out.
Looks like we'll have to fight him.
- Fight him? We don't have time, look!
- Maybe when that timer gets to zero,
a good thing will happen and not a bad thing.
- It's always a bad thing, Lily, always!
- Excuse me, hi.
Do you know what happens when the time runs out?
- It means my double fudge brownies are done baking.
- See, Parker, it's not bad.
- Kidding, you and everything in here will be blowed up.
[cackling]
- Poor Angus, I let him down!
Twice!
First down Old Stinkhole,
then when I couldn't get him out of Old Stinkhole.
If only I would have kept those awesome potions,
I would've been able to turn into something cool
and just float over this jerk butt door-blocker.
- Parker, I think we overlooked a solution
that's been right in front of our eyes this entire time.
- [gasps] You're right, Lily.
We can bribe him with this delicious--
- Jump. - Turkey leg I kept.
- I was thinking of something else.
- Better than the turkey leg?
Yep, way better than the turkey leg idea.
- Come down here!
You can't do that! You're supposed to fight me!
- Sorry, mister, no time! - It's not good.
- Boy, did I waste a lot of money on potions.
- The Worm King takes all!
[tense music]
The Worm King takes all! - [gasps]
- The Worm King takes all!
- Where's my best bud Angus?
- Do you not understand the chant?
The Worm King takes all.
That includes your best bud.
- And now it includes both of you.
- The Worm King takes all!
The Worm King takes all!
- Enough!
- The Worm King takes all!
- I'll handle these two myself. - Yes, Worm King.
- No worries. - Mr. Worm King, sir?
All I want is my friend Angus back.
I'll do anything to make that happen.
I'll even take his place. You can have me instead.
- I'm afraid you're too late.
There is no Angus,
for he is now the Worm King!
- What? No!
Angus, you're the Worm King?
But we came to rescue you from the Worm King.
- It is you who needs rescuing, for the Worm King takes all!
- The Worm King takes all! - We gotta run, Parker.
- No, we can't leave Angus!
- Parker, Angus is the Worm King.
- I know! I'm so confused!
[dramatic music]
[both screaming]
* *
- Phew.
Ahh!
Oof.
Finally!
* *
- This way, Parker.
* *
- Goodbye, old friend.
* *
- Ahh!
Whoa!
Did they fall for it? - Huh?
Fall for what?
- That stupid Worm King hooey I was yapping about.
- Wait, so you're not the Worm King?
- No, those worms were gonna
eat old Angus for dinner.
So I pretended I was their leader to save my hide.
Now throw me that rope!
- Hmm, how do we know you're telling us the truth?
- Why would I make that up?
- Sounds like something the Worm King would make up.
- Exactly. - I'm not making it up.
There is no Worm King.
That's what I'm trying to tell you.
- Or is the Worm King trying to tell me?
- The Worm King takes all!
- Please just throw me that rope!
- Not so fast, Worm King.
If you're the real Angus,
then tell me something only Angus would know.
- You dropped me down Old Stinkhole, Parker.
- Yep, that's Angus.
* *
[upbeat music]
- Oh, sweet, sweet fresh air. - We did it, Lily!
We rescued Angus!
- We sure did, Parker.
- Pa-Pa-Pa-Parker!
- Ready for another epic quest?
- You know it, Lily!
But first we'll need supplies!
[echoing]
[upbeat music]
* *
01x18 - Inside Russell/The Stinkhole Chronicles
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Parker J. Cloud, a former raincloud, their friend Angus, and pet walrus Russell deliver mail all across Mount Middlemost.
Parker J. Cloud, a former raincloud, their friend Angus, and pet walrus Russell deliver mail all across Mount Middlemost.