03x08 - Annie Oakley

[bunniefuu]

Next, on Airwolf.

An electron beam laser w*apon was stolen.

We're supposed to send our bag man

to the stunt men's tryouts
at Old Silver City.

Some folks around here think
that I'm kind of a bad hombre.

I hope you can handle that Gatling g*n.

I'm gonna take care of this hero.

Dom, this is Caitlin. Come in.

Any minute, now.

All set.

The cargo's on schedule.

Ready? All right, get in.

Come on, get that long copter.
We ain't got all night.

Let's move it, guys.

Karl, what's on here? Now,
this wasn't part of the plan.

Hey, level with me buddy.

Don't concern yourself.

Hey, I thought we were partners, Karl.

Partners? Dennis, you're hired help.

$ , for a few minutes
work. No questions.

Yeah, but you forgot to mention
the size of this escort.

This deal is a whole lot
bigger that you led on.

I think we just may have to renegotiate.

Don't get greedy, Slade.

You take your $ , and spend it

in good health.

Now, move it.

All right, pack it up.

Well Leo, what do you think?

I think, how much?

Gee Leo, a big-time arms broker like you

ought to know what someth’n
like this is worth.

But, since I'm not a greedy
man, let's say $ million.

I usually get % to
arrange the transaction.

They'll have to pay your share.

You know Karl, when a
w*apon like this is stolen,

the border slam shuts in a hurry.

You'll be expected to deliver to an Eastern
Bloc country if you want your money.

I'm aware of that.

Don't worry. I'll get it out of the country.

If you can, there's a good
chance I can make a deal.

I'll be in touch.

Drive carefully, Leo.

Karl, we gotta talk. That
is really advanced…

Eavesdropping can be a
very dangerous hobby, Slade.

$ million and you're
offering me a measly $ , ?

I'm not gonna let that happen.

So, what are you gonna do? Go to the cops?

What, and take the rap for
murdering those guards?

No way.

I'm gonna give you a bit
of free advice, Slade.

You're playing in the big leagues now.

You start going around making idle threats,

somebody's gonna hand you your head.

Got it?

Look, enough already. All you need
is this and a pair of swim trunks.

Sometimes less.

Sounds like my kinda place.

What's the matter?

Noth’n.

Let's get going. Now!

No.

No, Michael, no.

They answer is absolutely, "No, not!"

Hawke, I'm glad I caught you.

You didn't catch me, Michael.

I've got days off, and I'm on my
way to the north shore of Oahu.

Oahu, huh?

Whatever gave you that idea?

I'm Michael Goldsmith-Briggs.

Kiki Tanabe.

Kiki,

Hawke and I need to talk.

No, we don't.

Could you excuse us for just
a couple of minutes, please?

Kiki,

would you mind waiting on the front
porch just… just for a minute?

Okay, but remember,

I have to meet the rest of the
flight crew in minutes.

Just a second, honey.

Stewardess, huh?

I must start flying commercial more often.

You're aware of the Firm's
laser weapons research?

Vaguely. Some ray g*ns, proton
blasters, stuff like that.

Yeah well,

embarrassingly, we're missing one.

What's this "we" stuff, Michael?

Don't you mean that you
guys are missing one?

hours ago, the Mongoose,

an electron beam laser w*apon,
was stolen by parties unknown

while it was in transit
to our secret testing site.

I needn't tell you all hell is coming down.

Starting with the President himself.

High priority, huh?

A man called this morning,
who was part of the heist.

He offered us the name of the
individual who has the Mongoose

in exchange for $ million dollars.

So pay him. A million bucks
is pocket change to you guys.

Oh, we intend to.

It's the how that's a little bit
tricky. That's why I need you.

We're supposed to send our bag man

to the stunt men's tryouts
at Old Silver City.

Tryouts?

Yeah. It's a touring Wild West
show. They start tomorrow.

You can take Dominic and Caitlin, too

if you think they'll be of any help to you.

You all work around stunt people
all the time, you know the lingo.

If anyone recognizes you,
it'll look % legitimate.

I'll tell you something.

We do aerial stunts, not cowboy stuff.

Doesn't the Firm have some
buckaroo on the payroll?

No, we don't.

Come on, I know you can ride a horse.

You can fake the rest of it
until you make the payroll.

How am I supposed to find this guy, anyway?

He says he'll find you.

So?

Are we set?

No, no. Michael, I'm sorry.

Of course, Silver City has, in the past,

been a favorite location of numerous
movie and television westerns.

We are pleased again this year to be
hosting the stuntmen's auditions…

This looks like the place.

…for Annie Oakley's Wild West Show.

It's an exciting day, folks.

So be ready for action at any time.

Who's that lowdown varmint who
claims she's Annie Oakley?

Looks like we might
have some trouble, folks.

But there's no need to panic.

Annie can take care of this sidewinder.

You call’n me out?

I'm call’n you a sneaking coward

who don't deserve to be called an Oakley.

Annie Oakley was the best
sh*t there ever was!

And you're a fake!

Maybe you'd like to try me.

It's your funeral, lady.

Uh-oh, folks, watch yourselves.
They're fixing to tussle.

I surrender!

Please Annie, I give up!

Okay!

You're Annie! You're Annie!
You're the best, Annie!

You win! Help!

There she is, ladies and gentlemen,

the greatest p*stol sh*t in the world,

the new Annie Oakley,

queen of Annie Oakley's Wild West Show.

Thank you for your attention.

And let's give a final hand to Annie Oakley!

Well, looks like Miss Fancy-Pants
is run’n the show here.

Think she's connected?

Oh, she's connected, all
right. Well-connected.

I guess I'll mosey on over and
see if I can get us a tryout.

Mosey? You hear him, Dom?

You give a guy a cowboy
hat and a pair of boots,

and he thinks he's Gary Cooper.

- Mom, that was great!
- You thought that was pretty good, huh?

- Sure Mom, you're the best.
- Oh thanks, honey.

I can count on you.

Excuse me, ma'am.

My friends and I just arrived.

We're kind of looking to
see if we can get a tryout.

Well, are you experienced stunt people?

- Yes, ma'am.
- What are your specialties?

Well, Caitlin there, she can
ride just about anything

you can find a place to set her on it.

Dom, he used to double Yakima Canutt.

- Horse pucky!
- Rex.

Mom, everybody knows Yakima Canutt
was the greatest stunt man ever,

and no one doubled him.

But that doesn't give you any excuse

to use language like that.

Fine-looking boy.

Actually, it took us a lot of
work to get him to say "pucky."

Now, you were telling me
about your background.

Myself?

Well, I can ride it, rope it, fall it down,

and if it steps on me, I can
cut its throat and eat it raw.

Well, I'm sorry Mr. Hawke, we
don't have any room for you today,

but we could give you a tryout tomorrow.

That'd be fine with me.

Say, didn't we work on a
little feature down in Mexico?

Something called Death of the Mongoose?

Maybe, for that Firm Deal Productions?

That's right. It's good to see you again.

Listen, why don't you fill this thing out

and bring it back with you tomorrow.

Thank you, ma'am.

It's my pleasure.

I just hope you're half as
good as your sales pitch.

- How'd you do?
- I got us a tryout.

My aching back. You mean…

We're gonna be up half the night practic’n.

Well, not really. I… found our snitch.

You here?

Find out anything?

Yeah, the Deputy Sheriff said
it looks like an accident.

That Slade was in the wrong
place at the wrong time.

I worked the crowd. Nobody
seems to have seen anything.

The stuntmen said Slade was neither
particularly liked nor disliked.

I know what it looks like,
but… I don't know.

But it just doesn't seem
like an accident to me.

What happened?

Your man got hit by a -pronged hay hook.

That's what happened.

And you didn't get to talk to him?

No.

Damn it, Hawke! The President
himself called the old man today.

They want the Mongoose back, or in
little pieces, whichever can happen first.

What do you want me to do, Michael?

I got sent here to bird-dog some snitch

who all of a sudden is not talk’n at all.

Sorry. Running into stone walls
makes me a little cranky.

Besides, I got a feeling the
Mongoose is here somewhere.

That could be.

But you know, I wouldn't know it

if they served it to me for breakfast.

I'll get you a sketch and
the specs on the w*apon.

Lydia here, will deliver it tomorrow.

Anything else you need?

What about the woman?

Her real name is Louise Mackey.
She's an Army brat.

Her Father taught her how to sh**t.

He was on the Army's p*stol team.

- Any financial problems?
- Not really.

She's not getting rich, but she's making it.

What about personal?

No serious relationship at the moment.

One previous marriage
that didn't last very long,

but resulted in a son, Rex.

Lives with her parents
while she's on the road.

For the past year, she's been
involved in a custody battle

with her ex-husband, a man named Stern.

We're checking on him right now.

Other than that…

So you want us to stay here, nose around

and see what we can find out, right?

Right now, you're the only chance we've got.

I can't afford any mistakes, Larson.

Are you sure it's the right size?

No sweat.

You do nice work.

It'll be ready by tomorrow?

Yes, sir.

Fine, then we'll proceed just as planned.

And here she comes.

How about that, folks?

Caitlin O'Shaughnessy, do’n a Pony Express!

How'd I do?

Well, a little too good. I'd better
look out, or you'll have my job.

Thanks.

Look out folks, there's
trouble on the saloon roof.

The Sheriff has finally
caught up with the Kid.

Better get your cameras ready, folks.

All right Kid, you're under arrest.

Watch it, Sheriff!

Oh, what a fight!

He's get’n awfully close to the edge!

String?

String!

Are you all right?

Dom, remember, it was left, left, right!

Sorry String, I blew it.

How about that fight
and high fall, folks?

You'll never see better.

That was Stringfellow Hawke
and Dominic Santini.

Take a bow, Dominic.

Thank you, thank you!

Let's give them a big applause, folks.

Folks, we're nearly to the
end of today's schedule.

Are you all right?

Yes ma'am, I'm fine.

I have got to tell you, that was the
best fall I've seen in a long time.

You looked totally out of control.

Well, that's the way it's
supposed to be, isn't it?

Congratulations. Very realistic.

Thank you, ma'am. You know what
they say. Practice makes perfect.

The blood's a nice touch, too.
It almost looks real.

Yeah, that's the good stuff.
I make it myself.

Beauty, Mr. Hawke.

You know, I'd sure like to use you guys,

but we don't usually have a high-fall
set with the traveling show.

But didn't you list a*t*matic
weapons as one of your specialties?

Well yes, I've… I’ve had my hands
on a few, a time or two.

Do you think you could
handle a Gatling g*n?

Handle it?

Why, he can lay down a field of fire

and make it whistle Dixie
while he's doing it.

That's great. I've been work’n on a routine

where I sh**t against a Gatling g*n.

Why don't we give it a try after lunch?

That'd be fine by me.

All right. I'd better get the
show back on the road, though.

I got to keep 'em hopping.

Come on, partner. Congratulations.

Well, I thought everything
worked out real fine, huh?

The crowd loved us.

Yeah, maybe I should have
broken my neck for real.

We might've been the hit of the show.

Aw, String.

So do we have a deal?

What happened?

Their eyes lit up like it
was Christmas morn’.

You've got it. $ million on delivery.

They want to know when and
where they can take it.

I plan on having the w*apon in
East Berlin in about weeks.

Excellent.

Listen Karl, they want
this w*apon at any cost.

If you run into trouble,

call me at this number.

I usually don't get involved,

but I'll make an exception in this case.

I got connections in Mexico.

I can arrange for you to take
the w*apon across the border,

and from there into Cuba.

Remember, if anything goes wrong…

Right, I'll call you.

- Howdy, partner.
- Hi, Mr. Hawke.

How's things go’n?

Okay, I guess.

You don't sound too sure.

The tryouts are over tomorrow.

My grandparents are coming to get
me so Mom can go on tour again.

Kind of put a burr in your saddle?

Well, they're real nice,

but I wish I could stay with Mom.

You know son, now and then,

some of us have to go down
a stretch of bad road.

I figure a tough young guy
like you can handle it.

I guess so.

Speaking of tough,

I noticed you got some chew.

Yeah, you want some?

No, not me.

You know, some folks around here
think that I'm kind of a bad hombre.

Tell you the truth, that
stuff there makes me sick.

Really?

Turns my stomach. How long
you been chewing it?

Years.

Well you know, I'm not one to
put my nose in a man's business,

but I don't think a youngster
ought to have no chew.

Come on Mr. Hawke.

All of us cowboys chew or dip snuff.

Some do both.

Whatever you say, pard.

All right baby, lift your head up.

You'll feel better now.

Just lie down for a little while.

Put your feet up.

Chewing tobacco. What'd
he think he was do’n?

I don't know.

But if it's any consolation, I did the
same fool thing when I was a kid.

So did I.

Chewing tobacco is pretty tough
medicine, but it sure cured me.

Thanks for looking out for him, Hawke.

Well, he's a fine boy. I don't think
he's too happy right now, though.

Neither one of us are very happy

every time he has to go back
to my folks' house.

No way around it?

No.

This show's no place for him.

We're in a different town every week.

But it's what I do.
I can't sew, I can't type.

I'm an entertainer, and I'm good at it.

And I like it. Except for…

Except for leaving Rex.

Looks like you got a
pretty raw deal, cowboy.

You rescue my son, and for a reward,

I dump my troubles on you.

Don't you worry about it.

Listen, I better get go’n.

I'll see you at the tryouts.

Hey Hawke,

I hope you can handle that Gatling g*n,

'cause I like have’n you around.

She's all yours.

String, what happened? You okay?

Powder burns.

I never had that happen before.

Just what did happen, buddy?

Look man, the g*n doesn't belong to me.

I'm only the Property
Master, I just rent 'em.

Probably a hot load.

This Gatling g*n's an antique.

It just couldn't take the pressure.

Come on, let 'em take a look at that arm.

You know Larson, you are
the Property Master.

That makes you responsible, unless
that's more than you can handle?

What do you expect me to do about it?
This thing just happened.

I expect you to handle your
job like a professional.

That way, accidents like
that won't just happen.

I'm real sorry about your arm, Hawke.

But like you stunt boys say, that's
why we pay you the big money.

- You mean we got the job?
- Sure did.

We'll work on the act a little bit later.

That is, if we can get Larson
to get his act together

and get us a working g*n.

Excuse me.

More trouble in Silver City?

I thought I told you
you weren't welcome here.

Got to talk to you about Rex.

Well, we're on anyway,

it'll be a lot easier to move around now.

Dominic, why don't you go see

if you can get a handle on what really
happened with that Gatling g*n.

You too?

You got the feel’n that this
accident wasn't just an accident?

I think we've all got that feeling, Dom.

I'll see you.

And Caitlin, why don't you go
check out Annie's new trouble,

see what you can turn up.

Looks like I got a date with an angel.

I thought it was clearly understood

that any communication between
us would be through our lawyers.

Look Annie, those people are
only interested in our money.

I'm interested in our son.

A boy needs his Father.

That's very good, Karl.

You've been reading
fortune cookies again, huh?

You know, if I had my way,

you'd never see Rex again,
never interfere in our lives.

That can be arranged.

What do you mean?

I've got a proposition for you, Annie.

How would you feel about giving up

the first months of your tour here

and take’n the show to Europe?

They're mad about anything
from the American West.

Look at these cities.

Birmingham, Manchester, Florence,

Turin, Frankfurt, Munich, East Berlin.

I have commitments here. Signed contracts.

I can take care of those. I
can take care of everything.

Visas, permits, whatever.

Instead of playing in front
of hundreds in Altoona,

it'll be thousands every night.

- What's in it for you, Karl?
- Simple.

% of the gross.

Your share will be more than
double what you'd make here.

Now, what do you say, huh?

I say no.

I have commitments. I have contracts.

Those people in Altoona are looking for me.

I see.

How would you feel if I gave
up the custody suit for Rex?

Why would you do that?

All right, I guess you might as well know.

I've got money troubles, big ones.

I'm in deep to a loan shark.

This money will square me.

Now that sounds more
like the Karl that I know.

Willing to give up his own
son for a couple of bucks.

Hey, I'm not gonna do him much
good floating in the river.

Help me, Annie.

Please.

Hey, Annie.

I'm haul’n the Gatling back to the g*n shop.

Just make sure it's fixed properly.

I'll think about your offer.

I'll be around.

Say yes, Annie.

Come on.

Present from heaven?

Archangel might like your analogy, but…

I'd call it hell from above.

Hawke, Stern wants Annie to take the
show to Europe including East Berlin.

Archangel might just be right.

Can you imagine a better
way to get past Customs

than have it disguised as a show prop?

Hawke, Dom's trailing that g*n.

We'd better go back him up.

Follow the main highway, Cait.

There's a couple of side roads up there.

Oh my God, Hawke!

- Cait, set this thing down now.
- Right.

Mama-mia!

How am I going to explain
this to the rental agency?

- Dom, you okay?
- Yeah.

I'll tell you one thing, you look like hell.

Oh, thanks.

I knew you'd make it.

Anyway, we figured out
that Gatling g*n accident.

Yeah, but you still lost the g*n.

I got an idea that he's gonna bring it back.

And he's gonna bring it back all repaired.

Yeah, with the Mongoose
disguised inside of it.

Dom,

it's time for you to go get the Lady.

Hey, that suits me fine.

I'm tired of being a cowboy.

You got a plan?

Right now, I don't think
anybody's got a plan.

We're on to Stern, Stern's on to us,
or at least he knows we're close.

The best thing we can do,
is just call his hand.

How do we do that?

Watch.

You've got to be kid’n me.

Star Wars lasers, and
Karl involved with ‘em?

Hawke, the man's a lot of
things, but he's not a traitor.

We do know that Karl wants to ship
something out of the country,

and we think

he wants to use your company's
prop boxes to disguise it.

Well, can you prove any of this?

No, not yet.

We had an informant who was
supposed to identify the head man,

but he was k*lled.

Dennis Slade.

And you think Karl m*rder*d him?

Hawke, I was married
to this man. I know him.

He's Rex's Father.

Hell, right now, he's involved
in a custody suit for his son.

Custody battle's been pretty
tough on Rex, hasn't it?

Well, sure.

But I have an idea maybe it'll be over soon.

I'd like to give you
a piece of advice, Annie.

Don't you let Karl use you.

And don't you let him use Rex

to get you to do someth’n which
you might regret later on.

You're way too nice a lady.

- Who are those guys?
- Beats the hell outta me.

But the barrel-belly one
was definitely tail’n me.

You're sure you made it
look like an accident?

You should have seen it.

That car went fly’n off that cliff

like Evel Knievel trying
to jump the Snake River.

Except Evel lived.

I don't like it. They're too close.

Leo? It's Karl.

The plane ready?

Clearance into Cuba?

And the comrades will pay my price?

Good. We should see you within the hour.

- Hawke, you were right!
- About what?

Everything, Karl, and the w*apon.

He's got it hidden in the blacksmith
shop and he's planning to leave soon.

We'll see about that. Come on.

Enough gas?

Hey Mr. Stern, how about
an escort to Mexico?

You two stay here. Stop any
uninvited guests from coming.

Wait just a damn minute.

This is my show, my ex-husband,

and I'm a better sh*t than you will ever be.

There's no way I'm staying out here.

Freeze!

Annie, what is this?

Save it Karl, I know
all about the Mongoose.

Hold it right there.

You always did have guts, Annie.

Now you're gonna be my insurance ticket.

Valentine, take care of him.

Larson, we're out of here.

Let's go!

You know Burt, there's
no reason to rush this.

Ever seen a man get kneecapped?

Okay, hold it! I got you…

covered.

You take care of these .

Try and contact Dom, will ya?

Dom, this is Caitlin. Come in, Dom.

I read you, Cait. Go ahead.

All hell broke loose around here.

Stern and one of his men are heading for
the border with the w*apon in a truck.

Hawke's after him on a motorcycle.

Okay, any fix on their direction?

Yeah, they were headed southeast outta here.

Roger. I'm on my way.

Dom, Stern has Annie in the truck with him.

Okay. Out.

We got company.

Damn! Lose him! There, that road!

Hold it steady. I'll take care of this hero.

Okay boys, I can't sh**t at you,

but maybe I can scare you to death.

I'll cover you, String.

Let's try the landing gear again.

Easy sweetheart, we can make it.

How bad is it?

Bad enough.

Forward scanner's out. Those
turbos are blinking malfunction.

And you can't dodge lasers
without those turbos.

We're gonna have to. So what else?

Those guys are miles from the border.

Come on, let's go.

Come on with me, Annie.

Larson, a couple more miles
and we've got it made!

String, just a little over
a mile to the border.

Copperhead.

I had to stop him. You know that.

I understand.

You know, I'll never be able to
thank you guys enough as it is,

but I have one little favor to ask you.

Anybody know a good tutor?

I've decided to take Rex with me on tour.

All right!

You know pard, your Mom's gonna be
keeping a pretty tight rein on you.

Better watch your step.

Yeah, I know Mr. Hawke.
No cussin' and no chewin'.

Yeah, but you can chase
all the girls you want.

I'll be seeing you down the road, ol' horse.

Right, pardner.

- Bye. Thanks again.
- Bye.

They're gonna do just fine.

I just wish I could find
myself a cowboy that cute.

Here comes a man looking for his Mongoose.

Hello, Michael.

Where's my g*n? The Mongoose?

Afraid you're gonna have to
write that off, Michael.

It's just this side of the border,
in about little pieces.

Pieces?

Little pieces.

Well,

C’est la guerre.

Oh, by the way,

I brought you a message.

From Kiki.

Kiki?

It just says "Aloha."

Is that supposed to mean
"hello" or "goodbye" or what?

I can't tell, but when she gave it to me,

she was with this individual,

very tan, very blonde,

with about perfect teeth.