06x07 - Shall We Dance?

[bunniefuu]

Hey.

Hi.

How Was Your Day?

Terrible.

The Opposing Attorney
Is Getting A Divorce.

He Looked At Me And Said

"You Should Be Home Taking Care
Of Your Children."

At Which Point, I Politely
Offered My Card And Said

"Please Give This To Your Wife.

"I'd Love To Represent Her
In Your Divorce...

For Free."

Tell Me Again What He Said.

He Said, "What Do You Know
About Anything?"

What Is His Name?

No, Because

I Will Go Over And Talk...

No, I'm Serious.

Let Me Tell You About My Day.

Let's Talk About That Later.

Hmm?

I've Had A Terrible Day.

I Listened To You
Talk About Yours.

Why Can't You Listen To Mine?

You Asked Me About My Day.

I Did Not Ask You.

Days Like This I Want Out,
But I Come Home To Bills

I Know Why I'm Working.

What Bills?

Or Am I Not Allowed To Talk?

I'm Sorry.

Of Course You Can Talk.

Let's Look At These
Together.

The First One Is From
Jake's Appliances.

Is There Anything
I Should Know About This?

No, I Don't Think So.

No, No.

Look, Since You're
So Depressed

Why Don't I Take You
For A Nice Ride?

You Are
The Cutest Thing.

Thank You, Dear.

And I'm Looking At This.

I Know You Go Into Jake's
And Get Uncontrollable...

Stop!

Total Purchases For The Month:

$ . ?

That's Right.

And The $ . I Spent On
Batteries For Your Calculator.

I Think You Should Apologize
With A Kiss.

I'll Kiss You, But
It's Not An Apology.

I Just Like Having
My Lips On Your Face.

I Love That.

Mom, Dad, I'm Glad
You're Home.

Why Is It

Every Time I Kiss My Wife
A Child Pops Up?

How Was Your Day
At School Today, Rudy?

Why Are You Asking
About Her Day

When You Didn't Ask Me?

Let The Child Speak.

School Was Fine.

Good.

There's Something I Saw
I Want You To Get Me.

Why Is It That It's Always
"Something I Want?"

Why Can't You Say

"Mom, Dad, I Want
To Buy You Something."

Why Would I?

You And Mom Have Everything.

If I Had That, I Wouldn't
Have To Ask For It.

And You Know What We Have
That You Don't Have?

Jobs.

Rudy, What Is It You Want?

I Was At The Mall.

There It Was In The Window.

The Most Beautiful Sweater
You've Ever Seen.

Take One Look At It,
And Say "This Is To Die For."

Didn't I Take You Last Month
To Buy New Sweaters?

Yeah, But You Didn't
Buy This One.

This One Is To Die For.

I Think I Know Why Rudy
Wants A New Sweater.

I Was
Walking Rudy

Home From School
The Other Day.

We Met This Boy Named Clarence.

Vanessa.

No!

She Was So Flustered,
She Could Hardly Talk.

Stop Teasing Your Sister.

I'm Not, I Think It's Great.

I'm All For Rudy
Being In Love.

Dad, She Has Clarence Written
All Over Her History Book.

Oh, No.

We're Studying A Clarence
In History.

Who? King Clarence?

Clarence The Great?

Clarence The Hun?

Shut Up.

I Think It's
Clarence The Wonderful.

I Said I Go To Work
To Pay Bills.

But I Also Go To Get
Away From That.

You Know, I Had This
Demanding Patient Today...

Oh, Baby, Please.

Not Now, Later, Okay?

It's Time For Me
To Prepare Dinner Now.

Perhaps You'd Like
To Hear My Story...

Since The Beginning Of Time

Everybody In The World

Has Had To Learn How To
Get Along With One Another.

To Be Congenial
In Different Situations.

Isn't That Right?

Right.

I'll Bet Even
, Years Ago

Prehistoric Men Used
Some Form Of...

Table Manners, For Instance.

So...

Wake Up, Kenneth!

I Thought It Would Be Fun

To Study Manners
The Way They Are Today.

Our First Lesson Is Good Manners
At The Dinner Table.

As You Can See,
I've Set The Table.

I Want Some Volunteers

To Come Up And Demonstrate
Good Table Manners.

Good, Good.

Now What About Some Males?

No Male Volunteers.

Have It Your Own Way.

Would You Oblige Us, Kenny?

And Follow Me.

But I Didn't Volunteer.

Yes, I Know.

You've Been Drafted.

Congratulations,
Kenneth.

Come Up Here.

Now I Need
Two Young Ladies.

Rudy And Amy.

I Need One
More Gentleman.

I'll Do It.

Clarence, Very Good.

Come Along.

Sit Over There
Next To Rudy.

We're Going To Learn

How To Pass Bread
At The Dinner Table.

Amy, You Ask Kenneth
For The Bread.

Kenny, May I Have
Some Bread, Please?

Yes, You May.

Kenneth, You Don't Take
The Bread First, Dear.

Hey, Have You Ever
Seen Her Eat?

If I Don't Take It Now,
I'll Never Get It.

Rudy And Clarence,
I'd Like You To Do

The Same Thing.

Clarence?

Yes, Rudy.

May I Please
Have The Bread?

Yes, You May.

Thank You,
Clarence.

Would You Like
Some Butter?

No, Thank You,
Clarence.

Well...

That Is

Just Exactly Right.

Class, Did You See This?

I Want You To Do It
Exactly The Way Rudy...

( Bell Ringing )

Class Dismissed.

And Children, We're
Going To Explore

Another Form Of Communication

Where Good Manners
Are Essential.

The Telephone.

And Kenneth?

We'll Start
With You.

Aww...

Very Nice, Class.

You Should All Do It

The Way Rudy And
Clarence Do It.

You Know, I Think
You Like Rudy.

What Are You
Talking About?

No, I Don't.

Yeah, Right.

You Jumped Into
The Seat Next To Her.

I Don't Like Rudy.

Tell Us More Lies.

( Kissing Noises )

Excuse Me, May I
Please Get Through?

I'm Standing Here.

If You Want To Get Through,
Climb Over, Right?

Yeah.
Yeah.

You're In My Way.

Tough, I Was
Here First.

Gooberbrain,
Just Stay There.

Gronk-Face.

Arf-Head.

Lyme Tick.

All Right, Clarence.

"Lyme Tick",
You Levelled Her.

Back In The Club,
My Man.

Hi, Dad.

Hey.

All:
Hi, Dr. Huxtable.

Well, It's Rudy
And The Chiffons.

Dr. Huxtable, Who Were
The Chiffons?

The Chiffons, A Long Time Ago,
Was A Singing Group.

And Mrs. Huxtable And I
Would Be Sitting In A Car

And...

They'd Start To Sing And...

We'd Start To Kiss.

If A Boy Tried
To Kiss Me

I'd Throw Him Out.

Boys Should Stay
Where They Belong.

Most Of The Time
They're Hog Heads.

Sounds Like You All

Are Having Some Problems
With The Boys.

Don't Make Me Talk About It,
I'll Get Sick.

But You Know What?

There's A Certain Guy
By The Name Of Clarence.

Clarence, Blech!

He's Like All The Others.

They Walk Around Like
They Own The World.

I'll Show You How They
Walk, Dr. Huxtable.

You Got It.

Too Slow, Bro,
Here We Go.

Put Your Lips
Where My Heels Slip.

Wha'zappenin'.

Wha'zappenin'.

Wha'zappenin'.

Wha'zappenin'.

Wha'zappenin'.

Wha'zappenin'.

Hey, Dad,
Back From The Mall.

Dr. Huxtable,
Guess What?

What?

I Bought You A Present.

Guess What?

What?

Give It To Me.

Here You Go.

It's A Pen

That Has A Ship
That Floats In It.

It's A Battleship.

Just Like The One
My Daddy Sails On.

Well, Thank You So...

...So Much.

I Was Just Saying
To My Children

How Nobody Ever
Gives Me Anything.

And Look,
You Give This To Me.

This Is The Most Beautiful
Pen I've Ever Seen.

Me, Too.

Can I Keep It?

Sweetie, You Don't Give
Someone A Present

And Then Ask For It Back.

( Sobbing )

Look, He's Crying.

I Know, But He Has
A Lot Of Pens.

Aw, Take Your Old
Stinking Pen.

I'm Going To Go Upstairs

And Draw You
A "Thank You" Note.

Thank You.

Bye.

Dad, You're
A Good Sport.

I'll Draw You
A "Thank You", Too.

Hi, Denise.

There's Martha
And The Vandellas

Going Downtown
Or Somewhere.

Where You
All Going?

Kim's Mom's Taking Us
To The Mall.

What's Happening
At The Mall?

That's Where Clarence
And The Other Boys Are.

Wait.

Four People Who Look
Like You All

Just Walked Through Here
Saying "Blech."

"This Is The Way They Walk."

And Now You're Going
To The Mall

Where They Are?

Right, That's Why
We're Going.

Clarence And The Boys Hang Out
At Circus Burger At The Mall.

And We're Going To Sit
At The Table Next To Them.

And Ignore Them.

Wait, Wait.

You're Going Over There
To Sit Down Next To Them

And When They Look At You

You're Going To Ignore Them.

Yeah.
Uh-Huh.

What If They Don't Look At You?

They Will.

( Bell Ringing )

Class Dismissed.

Clarence, Don't Forget To Stay
And Clean The Blackboard.

Oh, Tomorrow Is The Last Of Our
Good Manners Classes.

And Guess What?

We're Going To Have A Dance.

( Moaning )

I Want The Girls
To Wear Pretty Dresses.

And I Want The Boys
To Wear Jackets And Ties.

Aw...

All Right, The Girls Can Wear
Jackets And Ties

And The Boys Can Wear
Pretty Dresses.

Can You
Believe It?

We Have To Dance With
Those Glunks Tomorrow.

Let's Pretend
We're Sick.

I Have A Better Idea,
Let's Ignore Them.

Yeah, That Really Worked.

Let's Do It Right Now.

Yeah.

It's The Dirtballs.

You cr*ck Me Up.

I Know.

Let's Go Play Some
Basketball.

I Have To Do The Board.

Okay, Bye.

See Ya, Clarence.

I Forgot My History Book.

So?

So I'm Going To Get It.

Don't Expect Me
To Dance With You Tomorrow.

Fine, Dance With Yourself.

That's Not Funny.

It Wasn't Meant
To Be Funny.

Move.

Make Me.

Get Out Of My Way.

Okay.

Oops.

Pick Those Up!

Make Me.

Maybe I Will.

Oww!

What In The World?

Children!

Stop It.

He Shoved Me.

She Punched Me.

I Don't Want To Hear
Another Word.

You Like To Be So Close

You Can Be Partners
At The Dance Tomorrow.

Pick Up These Books,
And Go Home.

Clarence, Finish The Blackboard
And Go Home.

I'll Take My Notebook
And Go Home.

And Sit In A Hot Tub
And Re-Examine My Life.

Wha'zappenin', Home Girl?

I Said "Wha'zappenin',
Home Girl?"

Hi.

Ah, That's Nice.

Came Here To Do
A Little Housework.

Cleaning The Table
With Your Feet

So When I Put
My Sandwich Down

It Can Smell Like
Old Dirty Socks.

Okay, We're Depressed.

So, We'll Just Sit Here
And Be Depressed.

Daddy, It's Not Funny.

You Want To Talk
About It?

Okay.

There's This Boy, Clarence.

Clarence, Yes, Yes, Yes.

I Hate Him.

Why Do You Hate Him?

He Pushed My Books
On The Floor.

Why Do Boys Act Like That?

Okay, Look.

You're Years Old.

And -Year-Old Kids...

The Girls...

They're Like Capsules.

And The Capsules
Are Exploding.

Boom, Boom, Boom.

The Boys Are Like Capsules

But Their Capsules
Are Still Soaking.

Dad...

You're Making No Sense
Whatsoever.

Try This.

Think Of Geraniums.

Girl Geraniums

Open Earlier Than The Boys...

Don't Open Until...
Some Time... One Night.

What In The World

Does This Have To Do
With Clarence?

Clarence Is A Boy,
Not A Capsule.

I Am A Girl,
Not A Geranium.

You Should Be Better
At This.

You've Gone Through
Three Daughters

Before Me.

Okay, Let Me Try This.

Dad.

That's Okay.

I'll Go Upstairs And See

What I Can Find
In The Encyclopedia.

Hey, Rudy-Rudy.

Denise, We Have
To Talk Later.

Okay.

What Was That All About?

Your Sister's Having Problems
With o-Year-Old Boys

And I Was Trying
To Explain It.

Oh, Lord, You Didn't Go
Rambling On

About Geraniums
And Capsules, Did You?

No, I Was Not Rambling.

And I Think It's A Good Way

To Tell That Particular Part
Of Life.

It Worked On You.

And I Was Confused
Until I Went To Mom.

Oh, Come On.

Yes.

You Never Said That.

This Is Different.

This Boy Shoved Her,
Threw Her Books On The Floor.

Oh My, Dad.

This Happens To All Girls.

See This Scar?

David Boatman Did That,
When I Was In Fifth Grade.

Pushed Me Into A Tree.

And See This,
Right There.

Todd Chaney, Okay?

He Hit Me With A Bat
And Made Me Eat Dust.

Why Didn't You Say Something?

We Were Afraid You'd
Go After Them.

Of Course, I Am.

This Is Sick Business,
Pushing People.

With Baseball Bats...

Why Didn't You Say Something?

Yi, Yi, Yi.

You're Sick, Too.

Going Around Shoving,
Nobody Says Anything.

Is That Boy Still Here?

Hi, Olivia.

Hi, Rudy.

You Look Gorgeous.

You Think So?

Yes, Clarence
Is Going To Go Wild.

Who Told You About Clarence?

Everyone Knows About
Clarence.

Well, I Don't Like Him.

And I Won't Dance With Him
Today.

Okay.

Do You Really Think
I Look Gorgeous?

Yes.

I Was Thinking
Of Wearing Pink Instead.

No, Just Go With That.

It's To Die For.

Thanks, Olivia.

Good, Now...

We Have A Dance Floor

And A Punch Bowl.

And We'll Have Music,
And Presto...

This Is A Social Occasion.

And What Do Young Ladies
And Gentlemen Do

At A Social Occasion?

They Mingle.

What Do We Mean, Mingle?

Mingle Means To Stroll About

And Say "How Are You?"

And "Just Fine, Thank You."

And "See You Later."

Now, Everybody, Mingle.

All:
"Hello, How Are You?"

( Murmuring )

Don't You Think It Would Be
Interesting

If The Boys Mingled With
The Girls?

All Right...

We'll Skip Mingling.

And Go Right To The Music.

Rudy And Clarence, You're
Going To Start The Dance First.

All Right?

If He Tries Anything

We'll Be Right
Behind You.

She Plays Rough,
Step On Her Toes.

Right, Gotcha.

Do You Think You Could
Dance A Little Closer?

( Slow Music )

Pretend You're Enjoying
Yourselves, Children.

Teacher:
Rudy, A Little Smile.

Good Girl.

And Clarence,
What About You, A Smile?

All Right, Everybody
Choose Your Partners

And Join Clarence And Rudy.

Choose Partners
And Everybody Dance.

Oh, That's Lovely.

Uh, Mrs Mcgee?

Yes, Kenny, What Is It?

I Can't Dance.

What Do You Mean,
What's The Matter?

All The Girls Are Taken.

No, Kenny, Not All Of Them.

( Music Playing )

♪ ...Will Be
My Good News Day... ♪

( Laughing )