07x02 - The Jeffersons Go to Hawaii: Part 1

[bunniefuu]

Well, we're movin' on up
Movin' on up

To the East Side
Movin' on up

To a deluxe apartment
in the sky

Movin' on up
Movin' on up

To the East Side
Movin' on up

We finally got
a piece of the pie

Fish don't fry
in the kitchen

Beans don't burn
on the grill

Took a whole lot of tryin'

Just to get up that hill

Now we're up
in the big leagues

Gettin' our turn at bat

As long as we live,
it's you and me, baby

There ain't nothin' wrong
with that

We're movin' on up
Movin' on up

To the East Side
Movin' on up

To a deluxe apartment
in the sky

Movin' on up
Movin' on up

To the East Side
Movin' on up

We finally got
a piece of the pie

Florence, telephone!

Florence!

Hello?
Shh!

Hi, Curt. Yes, he is.

Just a second.

George, telephone!

Miss Jefferson, please.

What is it, Weez?

Curt Randall,
your accountant.

Oh, must be good news.
How do you know?

'Cause if it was bad
news, he'd call collect.

Hey, Curt, what's
happening?

Florence, didn't you
hear the phone ringing?

Oh, yeah, Miss Jefferson,
I heard it.

Then why didn't
you answer it?

Was it for me?
No.

That's why I
didn't answer it.

Florence.

Look, tell them for the
hundredth time,
the answer is still no! No!

Well, what was that all about?

Blue Sky Cleaners is
making another offer
to buy my stores.

Don't they know that those
stores are the most
important things I've got?

You're forgetting me,
George.

Oh, I'm sorry, Weezy.
The most important
things we've got.

Don't you remember when
I first started out,
everybody said,

"Oh, that little punk
ain't never gonna make it."

Well, who's having the
last laugh now?

The little punk?
Thank you.

Well, George sure
has come a long way.

Yeah, I gotta hand it
to the little punk.

He can afford to do
anything he wants to.

My vacation starts Saturday
and I can't even afford
to leave this apartment.

Oh, Florence, there
must be some place
you can afford to go.

Yeah, the zoo.

But with my luck,
Congo, the gorilla,
will be asleep.

Oh, we pay you
more than that.

Are you kidding?

My bank account is so low,
that my bank says
that I owe them interest.

Hello, Mr. Bentley.
Hello, Florence.

Oh, hey, Mr. Bentley.
Come on in.

Oh, thank you, Mrs. J.

I was just downstairs
picking up my mail,
so I brought yours up, too.

Oh, thank you.

Ah, a card from
Tom and Helen.

Ah, yes.
"Dear George and Louise.

"We're having a great
time in Hawaii

"and we wish you were here.
Love, Tom and Helen."

Oh, and, "P.S.
We'll be home this Saturday."

Is there anything for me,
Mr. Bentley?

Oh, I wouldn't know, Florence.

It wouldn't be proper
for me to look through
somebody else's mail.

Mmm, Hawaii! Now that's my
idea of a real vacation.

Oh, yes, Hawaii is a
truly magnificent place.

Lush, green forests,
clear blue water,
breathtaking sunsets...

You've been to Hawaii,
Mr. Bentley?

Ah, no. But I've seen
every episode
of Hawaii Five-O.

"Alohafrom Hawaii."
Alohameans
"goodbye", don't it?

Ah, yes. And it also
means "hello".

Oh, do you know how
to speak Hawaiian,
Mr. Bentley?

Ah, no, I only know
alohaand
one other phrase.

Oh, and what's that?

"Book 'em, Danno."

All right...

Oh, I wish George would
take me someplace like this.

Unfortunately, his idea of
a vacation is knocking
off early for lunch.

Well, I better
be off. I've got my
own mail to read.

Oh, Mr. J,
I was just leaving.

Oh, good.
I hate long goodbyes.

Oh, really, so do I.

You know, I remember once,
boarding this...

See you later, Weezy.
I gotta make an appointment.

George, look at the
postcard we got
from Tom and Helen.

Oh, yeah? What'd
they have to say?

Oh, just that they are
having a wonderful
time in Hawaii

and they
wish we were there.

Why? Does Willis want
somebody to watch
him do the h*nky hula?

George, do you realize it's
been five years since we
went on a vacation?

And you want to go
again?

Yes, George, call me crazy,

but every five years I
get the urge to
take a vacation.

You know, the kind where
you can just sit back,

put your feet up
and do nothing.

Oh, yeah, like what I
pay Florence to do.

George, will you be
serious for a minute?

Look, forget it, Weez.
Let's go to Hawaii like
Tom and Helen.

Weezy, look. I'm right
in the middle of my
busiest season.

Dirt waits for no man.

Oh, but Tom managed to take
time off from work.
Why can't you?

That's because the
people he works with
are glad he's off.

Can you imagine what
would happen if I took off?

You'll make me
a happy woman.

Listen, this is
important stuff, Weez.

My whole business
will fall apart.

But, George,
all I'm asking...

Look, forget about Hawaii.
Hawaii ain't that great.

If it was, why
did God separate it from
the rest of the country?

Well, so much for vacation.

Yep. Looks like neither
one of us is ever
gonna see Hawaii.

Oh, Florence, just because
George and I aren't going,

that doesn't
mean you can't go.

Me? The closest I'll ever
get to Hawaii

is the pineapple section
at the A&P.

Come on, Florence.
Maybe someday
you'll get to Hawaii.

Oh, sure. All I got
to do is find a
fairy godmother.

I wonder how I'd look
with a wand.

What'd you say?

Oh, uh, I was just wondering
about Helen and Tom.

Oh, boy, Helen.
Listen to those waves.

That wasn't the waves, Tom.
It was me.

Oh, good imitation.

Tom, we've been in Hawaii
for six days and you've
barely moved from that spot.

Oh, I'm just trying to
get a decent suntan.

Aren't you forgetting
about me?

Oh, here, I thought you
were finished.

You're impossible.
I might as well be
talking to a ki'i.

What's a ki'i?
That's Hawaiian for "statue."

If you'd take the time
to learn a little
about the islands,

you'd know some
of those things.

But no, all you want
to do is sit around
all day,

smearing yourself
with suntan lotion.

Now if I'm
missing something,
please tell me.

Because I can't
for the life of me
see what kind of pleasure

you get
out of just sitting here
doing the same thing

day after day.

Tom!

Oh, I'm sorry, dear.
I was just watching the hips.

I mean, the ships.

Tom, do you realize that
you're missing the main
attractions of Hawaii?

Well,
I catch what I can.

But we're leaving in three
days and we don't even
know what

the other side of the
Island looks like.

Yes, we do. It looks
just like this side, only
the water's over there.

Well, if you want to
sit here and fry like
a pork chop until Saturday,

that's fine with me.
I'm going for a walk.

Aw, now, Helen,
wait a minute...

Excuse me, would you
mind doing my back?
Uh...

Helen, wait!

I'm sorry, miss, I...
Helen!

Helen.

I guess she
didn't hear me.

Up and at 'em, George.

Oh, hi, Doc.

Boy, I'm glad I didn't have to
wait as long as this guy did.

Can I go home now?

Would you roll up your
sleeve again, please?

For what? The nurse already
took my blood pressure.

Yes, I know. It's pretty
high, George.

Oh, yeah, well, Doc,
that's your fault.

You shouldn't let your nurse
wear such short skirts.

Just roll up your sleeve.
Okay...

I'm gonna check your pressure
again just to make sure.

Okay. It's your office.

My nurse tells me that
you've been suffering
from headaches,

fatigue and
occasional dizziness.

Oh, yeah, she told me
a lot of things about
you, too, Doc.

How have you
been eating lately?

Fast. When my maid cooks,
you don't take time to
wonder what it is.

I mean have you been eating
a lot of salt or salty foods?

Should I? Then I don't.
No.

Okay, just breathe normally
and relax.

You call that relaxed?
Just stay calm.

Think about something
pleasant, I mean...

Think about your friends.

Your neighbors?

Your bank account.
Oh, okay.

All right.

Uh-huh.

Is that a good "uh-huh"
or a bad "uh-huh"?
Shh.

Uh-huh...

Now I know
that was a bad "uh-huh".

Okay, tell it to me
straight, Doc.
How long do I got?

You're all finished,
George.
What?

No...

No...

You're finished
with your test.

Oh.

Your pressure came down some.

Hey, it came down?
That means I'm cured.

Hey, you're a miracle
worker, Doc.

And you said
he was a quack.

George, your pressure
came down some
but not enough.

When was the
last time you had your
blood pressure checked?

The last time I came
to see you. Two or
three years ago.

No, more like
six years ago.

Yeah, well, that's what
I said, two, three,
six years ago.

George, you're a lucky man.

Most people don't realize
they even have
high blood pressure

until it's too late.

Hmm. Well, how late
is too late?

That's too late.

Well, ain't you got nothing
earlier than that?

You're a prime candidate
for either a heart attack
or a stroke.

What?
You're a fifty year old
black male

in a high-pressure job.

And black males have the
highest incidence of
high blood pressure.

Okay, okay, so what
should I do about it?

For one thing, you should
have your blood pressure
checked every year.

Everybody should.

Okay, then I'll see you
next year.

You need your's checked
more often.

Okay, I'll see you
next month.

George!

Look, I gotta go.
I missed too much
work already.

For one thing, you have
to learn how to relax.

Look, Doc. I've got a
business to run.
I'm too busy to relax.

You're too busy to live?

Oh, Doc...
Listen, George,

why don't you take
some time off?

Oh, is that all I've
gotta do? Great.

Well, tomorrow I'll knock
off early for lunch.

You need more time off
than that.

Now you're starting to
sound like my wife.

She was bugging me
this morning to take
her to Hawaii.

Some time in Hawaii
would be perfect!

It would?
Yeah, go to Hawaii.

Spend a week or so, relax,

and I'll check your
blood pressure when
you get back.

A week? There ain't no
way in the world I
can take a whole week off.

Besides, I feel fine...

George. Are you all right?

Hmm? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'm okay.

Look, don't say nothing
about this to Weezy, okay?

She doesn't even
know I'm here.

Hawaii, George?

Yeah, okay, Hawaii.

You want to go, too?

You look like you
could use a tan.

Mr. Bentley,
what are you doing?

Mrs. J, I was just
taking these things

down to Mr. J's store,

when I saw what
you were doing.

What were you doing?

Listening to see if
Florence was in there.

Oh...

I can find out for you.

Florence!

I want to surprise her.

I bought her a first-class
plane ticket to Hawaii.

Oh, Mrs. J,
You're wonderful.

But keep it a
secret, okay?

Roger, Mrs. J.
You can count on me.

I won't say a word
to anyone about it.
Good.

You won't believe what
that woman did...

Need some help?

Florence,
what are you doing here?

I work here, remember?

What are you doing?
Well, I was...

What does it look
like I'm doing?

Gift wrapping your fingers.

Right. I always do this.
Nervous habit.

I'm trying to quit.

Come on, Miss Jefferson,
you wrapping
something else.

Now what is it?

Okay, Florence.
I'll give you a hint.

If you could be anywhere
on Earth right now,

where would it be?

Billy Dee Williams'
dressing room.

Besides that.

Billy Dee Williams'
living room.

Florence, I've had enough
of Billy Dee Williams.

Then pass him
over here, child.

This is for you.
A ticket to Hawaii.

Hawaii?
That's right.

You mean, the "I want to go
back to my little grass shack
in Hawaii" Hawaii?

You leave Saturday.

Hawaii!
You mean it! Hawaii?

Well, I figured since
George won't take me,

why couldn't you go so
you could tell me
all about it?

Oh, Miss Jefferson.
Thank you, thank you,
thank you!

I don' know
what to say. Oh, thank
you, thank you, thank you.

I think I get the
message.

This is the best thing
that ever happened to me,
and you know what?

I'm gonna start packing
right now.

But, Florence, you aren't
leaving for three days.

I know and the next
time you pull something
like this,

you gotta give me
a little more notice!

Weezy!
Oh, hi, George.

Hey, have I got something
to tell you.

Oh, I have something
to tell you, too!

No, no, me first, me
first. Okay.

What have you been
bugging me to
do for a long time?

George, shouldn't we
wait till it's dark?
Oh...

Not that long, Weez.
I'm talking about this.

I got us some tickets
to Hawaii.

Hawaii?
That's right.

You mean as in, "I want to go
back to my little grass shack
in Hawaii" Hawaii?

That's the one. We leave
Saturday. Is that great?
Hey, Hawaii!

Why, yes, but...
But what?

Well, this morning
you said...

Look, forget about
this morning.

Just consider me
an afternoon kind
of guy.

But what made you change
your mind?

Well, it was a little
something in my blood.

Hey Weezy, can't you just
see the two of us just
sitting under palm trees?

Drinking Myfly's.

Mai Tai's.
Yeah, them too.

See, but, you know,
what I was thinking...

Miss Jefferson, do you think
diamond earrings

will go okay with this
dress?

Sure, Florence.

Can I borrow your
diamond earrings?

Forget the earrings,
Florence.

Besides there's
a lot of things
I want you to do

before me and Weezy
take off for Hawaii.

Hawaii? You mean
you're going, too?

Of course I'm going, too.

You think I'm gonna let
Weezy go to Hawaii
all by herself?

Uh, George, there's
something I've got
to tell you.

Weezy, ain't you
happy to go to Hawaii?

Oh, why sure I'm happy,
George.

Well, I thought you were
gonna be thrilled.

I am thrilled.
There's something
I want to tell you.

Well, what is it
you got...

You did what?

He loves the idea.

GEORGE:
Hey, Weez, I think it's
an awful idea.

Weezy, I...

Jenny, is there anything
you want from Hawaii?

Oh, yeah. Some chocolate
covered macadamia nuts.

And a puka
shell bracelet.

And a muumuu.

Anything else?

Yes, any piece of clothing
ever worn by Don Ho.

Tiny bubbles
in the wine

Oh, doesn't that song
bring tears to your eyes, huh?

Not until now.

Here, Ralph, this is
the last piece.
Yes, sir.

Where's Jessica?
Oh, she's with
her babysitter.

Oh, well, tell her
her grandpa's gonna
bring her back

a grass skirt when
he comes, okay?

I don't think they
make grass skirts that small.

Okay, I'll just get a
big one and mow it.

Are you sure that's
everything, sir?

Yeah, Ralph, look, I want
you take all this stuff
down to

Lionel's car and we'll
all meet you down
there in a minute, okay?

Yes, Mr. Jefferson,
and might I be the first
to wish you a safe trip

and a wonderful
week in Hawaii.

Yes, you may, Ralph.

Yes...

You know, sir...

Not everyone gets
to spend seven days

on such a beautiful
tropical island.

Why I'd thought I'd go
there myself this year, but

money being what it is.

Oh, yeah, here you go.

You know, sir.
You are very lucky.

For me it looks
like I'll be

taking the same
old vacation

I've been taking year
after dreary year.

Here it is, Ralph.
That's it.

Yes, sir, and thank you, sir.

And, uh, ma'am,
have a wonderful vacation.

Oh, we will, Ralph.

And speaking of vacations,
where do you go every year?

Oh, I have a little
beach house in
the Virgin Islands.

Pop, it's some guy from
Blue Sky Cleaners.

Oh, well, tell him to
talk to my accountant.

But, Pop, it's about
your stores.
He wants to talk to you.

Well, then hang
up on him.

I can't do that.

Pretend it's your
draft board.

Wrong number.

Come on, Florence,
it's time to go.

FLORENCE:
All right. All right.
Well, hurry up, woman.

You think I'm ready
to travel?

Sure, your broom's
in the closet.

George!

Florence,
you look very, uh,

colorful.

Why, thank you, Jenny.

I'll say one thing.

If she gets airsick
in that dress,

ain't nobody
gonna notice it.

Listen, Jenny.
When your parents
get back tonight,

tell them how
sorry we are we
missed them in Hawaii.

If you don't mind lying.

Well, Pop, I sure wish
I was going with you.

I've heard a lot about
those island woman.

Oh, yeah, me too.

Don't believe
everything you hear, son.

Well, I'm sure you're
gonna have a good time.

Yeah, and just think, George.
No traffic, no smog...

And the best part of all,
no Willises.

Tom.
Huh? Oh, hi, Helen.

Tom, do you realize what
time it is?

We're supposed to be
at the airport in
a couple of hours.

Yeah, I know.

Then what are you still
doing here?

Oh, nothing.

Just looking
over the horizon.

Why? Is it wearing a
bikini today?

Have you ever seen such
blue water in your life?

Tom, we have to hurry.

You've seen the water in
Long Island Sound lately?

On a good day, it's the
color of an old army cot.

Tom...
Probably just as
lumpy, too.

Tom, if we don't hurry,
we'll miss our plane.

And the air,
it's so clean here.

I don't understand why
you don't like Hawaii.

What are you talking about?
I love Hawaii.

Great! Then why don't we
stay a few more days?

What?
Look, Helen.

I've got another
weeks' vacation coming.

I promise, if you stay,
we'll see all the things
you wanted to see.

The aquarium,
the pineapple fields,
the sugar mill.

I'll even take
you sailing.

Tom, you know
I get seasick.

You'll have more
time to get well.

What do you say, Helen?
Can we stay?

Well, I was looking
forward to seeing Jenny
and the baby,

and Lionel and Louise...

What about George?

Well, maybe another week
in Hawaii would
be kind of nice.