09x20 - The Good Life

[bunniefuu]

To a deluxe apartment
in the sky

We finally got
a piece of the pie

Fish don't fry
in the kitchen

Beans don't burn
on the grill

Took a whole lot
of tryin'

Now we're up
in the big leagues

As long as we live,
it's you and me, baby

Ain't nothin' wrong
with that

To a deluxe apartment
in the sky

We finally got
a piece of the pie

Oh, hi, Tom.

Louise, don't move.
Are you ready, sweetheart?

HELEN: Ready.

Did you ever see
a dream walking?

Did you ever hear
a dream talking

Helen, you look...

Tom.

Please, I'm being
complimented.

Oh, I'm sorry, my angel.

But, Helen, I, I don't
know what to say.

You look beautiful.
Absolutely beautiful.

Oh, thank you, Louise.

What happened?

Oh, I, I don't mean,
"What happened" as in,

you don't normally look good.

I mean, "What happened" as
in you...

I think I understand.

Oh good, I didn't wanna
lay it on too thick.

Louise, Tom and I are spending
one of the most exciting days
of our whole lives.

-Oh, yes, you see...
-Tom just signed a new writer.

And as a present, he got me
a gift certificate to one of

New York's most
fashionable beauty salons.

HELEN: I'm telling you,
it's like something
you'd see in a movie.

HELEN: Honestly,
I just couldn't get over it.

Those people treated
me just like I was royalty.

HELEN: And, Louise,
it's not just a beauty salon,

they can make you over
from head to foot.

Of course,
I went with the works.

They have a chic
international clientele.

But the thing that I really,
really couldn't get over,

were the number of
celebrities in that place.

Oh, you really oughta
give it a try, Louise.

By the way, do you
have a hand mirror?

Oh well, I don't think that
salon is for me, Helen.

I feel uncomfortable in
ritzy places like that.

Well, so did I at first.
But as you can see,

I bore up well
under the strain.

Uh, sweetheart,

why don't you just sit down
and give your face a rest?

While I tell Louise
about my day.

You see, I signed up this
new writer and she's...

Uh, Miss Jefferson,
I'm through scrubbing
the kitchen floor.

Oh good, Florence.
Thank you.

Did you hear about
Tom and Helen?

Yes, sounds like you
had a pretty good day,
Mr. Willis.

Oh, actually, it was a
super day. Wait'll I
tell you about it. She...

And you, too, Ms. Willis.
Congratulations, you look
lovely.

Mrs. Willis?

-Hmm?
-Helen?

Hmm?
Oh, I'm so sorry.

I shouldn't have started this.
It's a bad habit.

Did you actually meet
a lot of celebrities
in that new salon?

Well, I didn't actually
meet them, but I really
did see a lot of them.

I got my hair trimmed
right next to Liza Minnelli.

-You didn't?
-Mmm-hmm!

Oh, Tom, do you think my pores
are unusually large today?

No, dear, you're looking into
the magnification mirror.

-Oh.
-Give me that.

You mean, you actually sat
next to Liza Minnelli?

Well, that reminds me about
my new writer. She is...

Child, what is the
name of that salon?

It's called Hallenbeck Croft.
It's very exclusive.

-Oh!
-Whoa,

Weez!
Guess what happened!

Uh, wait a
minute, George.

-Do you wanna hear
about Tom and Helen?
-No!

My stock split three for one.

What does that mean?

It means that I made
more in five minutes,

than you could make
in five lifetimes.

Ain't that great?

I'm all aglow.

Oh, you know
what else it means?

Remember that ring
you wanted? It's yours.

Oh, George, thank you!
Oh, that's wonderful.

Well, I'd say it's been
a pretty special day
for all of us.

Tom's new client...

-Oh yes, you see
my new client...
-George's stocks,

Louise's ring, my new face.

And Florence's...
Oh, Florence.

Oh, that's okay.
Listen, it's been a good
day for all of you, and,

-I'm happy for every
single one of you.
-Aw...

Course, I could have
done without hearing
about all of it in one day,

but I am happy
for all of you.

Oh, come now, Florence,

plenty of special things
have happened to you.

Haven't they, George?

I can't think of nothing.

Hello there,
Mr. Jefferson, sir,

I have a special delivery
package for Florence.

-Oh, for me?
-Oh, good.

Oh, there, you see?

Florence, all you need
was a little patience,

and good things were
bound to happen to you.

What is it?

My new vacuum cleaner bags.

Well, uh, there's a
good side to that.

Uh, well, you see...

"These bags hold
two gallons more soot

"than the old bags."

Uh, it says right here.

Helen, would you
like a cup of coffee?

Love some.

I'll go polish you a cup.

Not been a good day,
huh, Florence?

Oh no, it's been
a terrific day.
For everybody else.

Oh, I understand.

It's the plight of
the working class.

Doomed to spend a lifetime
watching our superiors

bask at the end
of the rainbow.

It's tough.

But I guess the best that we
can do is to use each other

to lean on.

Until we finally
reap our own

greater and just rewards.

Well, I guess you're right.

Would you like to come
in for some coffee?

Oh, I'm sorry, but I can't.

You see, I helped fund
a little expedition

that brought up a Spanish
galleon last night.

So I have to jet down to
Key West for the opening
of the treasure chests.

You know how it is.

Goodbye, Ralph.

Oh, Ralphie, would you like
to make an extra five bucks?

Passionately, sir.

Good. Because all you
have to do is hear me out.

I'm going to tell you
about my new client.

Now that is the last straw.

It's one thing for
all of y'all to have
a special day,

but when Ralph's on top of
the world, it's time for me
to come out fighting.

Miss Willis?

Mrs. Willis?
-Hmm?

You know what I'm gonna do?

I'm going down to that
beauty salon you went to.

Yep, I'm gonna sit back
and let folks wait on me
for a change.

So how much does it
cost to get the works?

Oh, well, $.

Oh, but it's worth it!

Well, what the heck?
I got $ saved,

I'm gonna blow it.

I could at least get
two-thirds of the works.

Uh, Florence.

Now look, Mr. Jefferson,
you can stand there and insult
me all you want, I'm going.

No, no, no! I just wanna
give you $, so you can
get the whole treatment.

-$!
-Shh! Just go get it.

Oh, Mr. Jefferson, thanks!
Thanks a lot.

You know, this might turn
out to be a special
day for me after all.

Oh, George,
I'm so proud of you.

That's one of the best things
you've ever done for Florence.

Look, I just had to, Weez.

I can't imagine one third of
that face running around
New York City.

All right, Sybil, tell
Gladys Knight we're ready
to begin her treatment now.

Right away.

Miss Knight, if you'll
just walk this way please.

I'm so sorry you've been
plagued by so many autograph
hounds, Ms. Knight.

-Oh?
-If you wish, I can call an
attendant to keep them away.

Oh no, honey,
don't you dare.

In that case, uh,

would you write,
"To Joey, one of my oldest
and dearest friends?"

Excuse me.

Have you seen any celebrities?

FLORENCE:
Me, neither.

Are you somebody?

I guess you ain't.

Are you somebody?

I can see why you ain't.

Are you some...

Yes, you are.

There you are,
Miss Johnston.

We've been looking
all over for you.

Now if you'll just follow me,
we'll begin your treatment.

This ain't gonna hurt, is it?

Not at all. Remember,
at Hallenbeck Croft,
your wish is our command.

Well now, you know,
that is good to know.

Because if I don't hurry
up and see some celebrities,

I'm gonna command you to send
my bill to Helen Willis.

"I HEARD IT THROUGH THE
GRAPEVINE" PLAYING]

I bet you wonderin'
how I knew

Baby, baby, baby, 'bout
your plans to make me blue

With some other girl
you knew before

Between the two of us girls
You know I loved you more

It took me by surprise
I must say

When I found out
yesterday

You know that I heard it
through the grapevine

Not much longer
would you be mine

Don't you know that I heard
it through the grapevine

Oh I'm just about to, 'bout
to, 'bout to lose my mind

Baby, won't you
listen to me? Oh, I...

Take a good look at
these tears in my eyes

Baby, baby, these tears
I can't hold inside

Losin' you would
end my life, you see?

'Cause you mean
that much to me

You could have
told me yourself

That you loved somebody else
Instead...

I heard it through
the grapevine

Oh, not much longer
would you be mine

Don't you know that
I heard it, yes I heard it

Oh, and I'm just
about to, 'bout to,
'bout to lose my mind

Are you going to be
all right under all that
avocado, Miss Knight?

Fine.
Well, it should only
be a few more minutes.

-Let me know if you
need anything.
-Okay.

Oh, I might get hungry.

Could you bring me a bowl
of corn chips in case
I wanna taste my face?

Oh, dear.

This way.

There.

I still don't know about
all this avocado mess.

Oh, it'll be all right.
It'll be fine. Don't worry.

Yeah, but if I wanted
this kind of treatment,

I could have saved my
money and just washed
my face at the A&P.

They sure do laugh a lot
around here, don't they?

Yeah, at these prices,
they can afford to be
in a good mood.

Mmm-hmm.
Hey, have you ever
been here before?

No, first time.

Good.
Then I'll show you the ropes.

You've been here before?

Me? sh**t, yeah.
I come here all the time.

And sometimes, even
more often than that.

Sandwich?

Well, I don't know.
How much are they?

They're free, ma'am.

Oh, in that case,
I'll take three.

-Sandwich?
-No, thank you.

Oh, that's okay,
honey, they're free.

No, thank you.

I'll take hers.

You know, things sure
have changed since the
last time I was here.

-Really?
-Wasn't it nice of them
to give us these little

cassette players so
we could hear music
while we was waiting?

Oh, that's great.

Now I can hear my
favorite singer.

Oh? And who would that be?

Diana Ross.

You know, I think she's
the best of all time.

Well, I wouldn't say she
was the "best" of all time.

Oh, who would you pick?

-Gladys Knight.
-She's good, too.

So they say.

You know, when you're
into music, the way I am,

it's easy to tell
the good ones.

Oh? You're a musician?

Well, sort of. Actually,
I sing in a church choir.

-Oh, really? I used to do that.
-Did you?

Yeah. Listen to this,
and tell me what you think.

With an emblem of
suffering and shame

Keep working on it.

I mean, you've got
potential and all that,
you know, but it's,

you're just not ready
for no church choir.

Well, that was
a long time ago.

I had to quit the
choir and go to work.

Oh, yeah, I know what you...

Of course, I'm sure
you're good at whatever
you do though.

Some seem to think so.

As a matter of fact,
last year I worked in
over different cities.

Mmm, mmm, mmm.

Well, you just hang in there.

Something permanent
will come along.

I got a little secret
I wanna tell you.

I ain't never been
here before neither.

Hush your mouth!

I ain't no rich lady.

-I'm a maid. You know?
-Oh, really?

Of course, it's steady work
and all that.

I wouldn't trade it
for none of that
part-time stuff you do.

But, uh, you know,
you're probably gonna
think this is silly,

but I came down here
to, well to be treated
special, you know?

-I don't think
that's silly at all.
-You don't?

No. As a matter of
fact, that's the only
reason I'm here.

-Well, now, see there?
We got a lot in common.
-That's right.

So what do you do
to feel special?
Well...

And please don't say,
"Come down here," child,

'cause if my boss hadn't
sprung for a third of this
treatment,

they'd've just smeared
peanut butter on my face
and sent me home.

No, no. Well, I've been a
lot of places, I tell you.

But to me, there's nothing
more special than being around
the people that you love,

and the people that love you.

Now I'm not saying we
shouldn't pamper ourselves
every now and then,

but let's face it, we all get
in a rut every now and then.

-You reckon?
-Yes, I do.

Even Diana Ross?

Oh, I certainly hope so!

But the point is, it's
your friends that make
you special.

Whether you've got
one or a hundred.

What more do you need?

You know something?

You sure are telling
the truth.
Yeah.

-I guess I just don't
think about it enough.
-Mmm-hmm.

-But I am special.
-That's right.

It's time.

Well, gotta run.
See you later.

-Oh, you know something?
-What?

-You're special, too.
-Oh, thank you.

Oh, miss?

Yes, ma'am?

-You know that lady that
was sitting here?
-Oh, mmm-hmm.

She don't work too steady.

-So I wanna pay for her tip.
-Oh.

Now here's a dollar for her,

and one for me.

And I'd appreciate it if you
wouldn't say nothing to her
about it, okay?

Yes, ma'am. Whatever you say.

Oh, sing it, Diana!
Hmm, hmm, hmm

Well, how do I look?

Florence, you look
absolutely gorgeous.

-Yeah, I do, don't I?
-Mmm-hmm!

-You know, and I had
a lot of fun, too.
-Oh, really?

The only bad thing was
I didn't get to see
no celebrities.

Well, honey, the way
you look, you could be
a celebrity yourself,

if it wasn't for the fact
that you're a nobody.

You know, you took the
words out of my mouth.

Well, y'all can
admire me later.

Now we gotta get
this song together.

-Yeah, yeah.
-So let's go.

One, two...

Saved by the bell!

That's probably the music
police to come and arrest
you all for vandalism.

Excuse me, does Florence
Johnston live here?

Yeah, unfortunately.

Hey...

George, don't just stand
there! Who is it?

-Oh, uh.
-Oh, I see her, never mind.

-Hello!
-Hi...

Girls, this is not a
hard song to sing.

You know, we're just
not doing it justice.

Now there's your
problem right there.

Your mouths are open, and
ain't nothing coming out.

Now, I don't look that good.

Well, maybe I do.

Anyway, I...

You, you're, you...
Do you know who you are?

Well, I ain't Diana Ross.

Well, that's good, 'cause I
don't never listen to her.

Listen, they told me
what you did for me at
the beauty parlor today,

and I just wanted
to come by to say

I thought it was beautiful.

What?

The tip you left for
me, remember?

I'm the lady with the
green face that sat
next to you today.

You wasn't.

-You was?
-Uh-huh.

Lord, take me into Your
Kingdom right now.

Listen, it was a
nice thing to do.

You should be
proud of yourself.

Really. I'm telling you.

I mean, a lot of people
would do things for me
when they know who I am.

But to you,

I was just another
woman with a vegetable
on her face.

But still, you
treated me special.

If that's the kind
of person you are,

then, Florence,

you're more than special.
You're a super star, girl.

Well,

here's your dollar.

And, uh, I'll give
you another one
if you'll just...

Ask these people to
stop f*ring those flash
bulbs in my face.

Mr. Jefferson, please!

Weezy, why don't
you dig yourself?

What y'all doing?

-Rehearsing? Music?
-Yes, uh-huh.

Yeah, this is a part
of my church choir.

Oh, really? Oh, about what
you said about my voice,

about not being suited
for the choir?

I, uh, I kind of like to check
these things out for myself.

You know, so...

If it's all right, um...

Thank you, thank you.

You'll kind of help me out
if I get a little shaky,
won't you?

Sure, yeah.
Yeah, go ahead, girl.

Run with it!

Okay.

Oh, I gonna lay
down my burden

Gonna lay down my
sword and sheath

I'm gonna lay down
my sword and sheath

I ain't gonna
study w*r no more

I ain't gonna
study w*r no more

I ain't gonna
study w*r no more

I ain't gonna
study w*r no more