11x07 - They Don't Make Preachers Like Him Anymore

[bunniefuu]

in the sky

a piece of the pie

in the kitchen

on the grill

in the big leagues

it's you and me, baby

with that

in the sky

a piece of the pie

certainly, Lord

certainly, Lord

certainly, Lord...

old time religion

show some sign

old time religion

to show some sign

certainly, certainly, Lord

Wasn't that terrific?

All right! We won!
We won!

Oh, now, George.
They haven't won yet.

The actual choir competition
isn't until next Thursday.

Who's talking about
choir competition?
I'm talking about the Mets.

We just b*at the Dodgers
in the ninth, three to two.

Hi!

Oh, Florence,
I'm so proud of you.

Your choir is a cinch
to win the first prize
trophy this year.

Oh, thank you,
Miss Jefferson.

You know,
I'm just surprised

you got Mr. Jefferson
to come down here.

Did you like it?

Yeah. Especially the last
inning... Uh, number.

Oh, Reverend Daniels,
I want you to meet
Mr. and Mrs. Jefferson.

Mr. and Mrs. Jefferson,
meet our brand new minister,
Reverend James C. Daniels.

So pleased to meet you,
Mrs. Jefferson.

You too, Reverend.

And Mr. Jefferson.
Good to see you
at our prayer service.

Hope to see you
here on Sunday.

He is new!

You'll have to
pardon my husband,
Reverend Daniels.

But if you dont,
don't worry.

You'll have plenty
other opportunities.

Aw, come on, Weez.
You're just saying that
because he's a reverend,

I mean,
he can take a joke.

Reverends have
a sense of humor too,
you know.

And, Florence,
your voice is getting
better every day.

See what I mean?

Well, it was nice
meeting with you.

Oh, by the way,
will you folks be
traveling to Ohio

for the choir competition?

No, I don't think so.
We'd rather listen
to 'em from here.

George, please.

Come on, Weez,
the man is smiling.

I haven't met
a reverend yet that
I couldn't make laugh.

I believe it.
I saw how much you put
in the collection plate.

GEORGE: Well...

It was absolutely
beautiful.

Glad you came.

Oh, Florence,
I forgot to ask.

Why wasn't Reverend Taylor
at the rehearsal tonight?

Oh, he called and said
he was coming down
with a little cold.

I guess he didn't
want it spreading
all over the choir.

A cold? Why didn't
I think of that?

Who is this genius anyway?

You know Reverend Taylor.
He's the one Reverend
Daniels is replacing.

He's been there for years.

I can't place him.

The one that you tried
to convince to put
"Jefferson Cleaners"

on the back of
the choir robes.

No wonder I forgot him.

After what he said to me
I found it impossible

to stay in the same
room with the man.

What did he say?

"Please leave
the room."

Here's the mail
for you, Weez.

Here's a letter for you,
Florence. Uh-oh.

It's from the government.

They probably heard
what you've been
doing to meat.

Oh, it's my tax refund!

You get a refund?
Yeah.

I get one every year.

Uncle Sam's way of saying,
"Sorry your boss is so cheap."

Oh, look!

$?

Oh, you could buy
yourself something
really nice with this.

Great idea.
Voice lessons.

What do you think?
Something for me,

or something for
the choir?

You want my opinion?

Well, you earned the money.
You should spend it
on yourself.

Oh, I couldn't do that.

You know, Reverend Taylor
always says that a penny
spent on others

is a dollar
spent on the soul.

Then it's simple.
Just spend that
money on the choir.

How can you say that?
I earned that money.

And Reverend Taylor
also says,

"Take care of yourself
when you can

"and the Lord will do it
when you can't."

Well, I say cash the check,
throw the money up in the air,

and whatever the
Lord don't keep,
put in your pocket.

And then put it in
the collection plate.

Howdy, Reverend.

Reverend Daniels.
Come on in.

Florence.

Mr. and Mrs. Jefferson,
I'm so sorry to interrupt.

Oh, is anything
wrong, Reverend?

Well, Florence,
you've been one of my
strongest supporters,

so I just stopped by
o tell you that

it looks like we're
going to have to cancel
that trip to Ohio.

What?

But they've
practiced so hard!

I know.

But the church's
heating system
just gave out

and needs replacement.

That choir competition
could've been
a wonderful thing.

But there are many
older people in the
congregation, Florence.

And I must put that money
where it does the most good.

Well, I've got
some money. $.

Oh, no Florence,
that's not why I came.

Besides, I couldn't
possibly take your...

Oh, yes you can.
And you will.

I mean, the choir's worked
too hard to give up now.

Oh, would $ be enough
to get that heating unit

and still leave us
enough to get to Ohio?

Yes, but Florence,
I couldn't possibly
take your money.

Then it's all settled.

I'm gonna endorse
this over to you,

and you can cash it
at my bank in the morning,

and there you are.

Look Florence,
I can't do this.

I don't want to hear
any more about it.

Now, you just get
that heating unit.

And if it makes
you feel any better,

you can name it
after me.

Now I understand
why Reverend Taylor
speaks so highly of you.

You are truly an angel.

I'm not an angel.
A saint maybe.

A maid, definitely not.

Reverend, won't you
stay and have some coffee?

Oh, I really shouldn't,
Mrs. Jefferson.
Mr. Jefferson.

Florence, maybe if I start
calling around now,

we can get that new unit
before Sunday's services.

Oh, good.

And, Florence,
God bless you.

Thank you, Reverend.

Oh, Florence,

that is one of
the most unselfish
things I ever saw.

Wasn't that
wonderful, George?

Where are you going?

Into the kitchen to
make a sandwich.

You know,
I could be wrong,

but I think watching
what you just did
actually touched him.

GEORGE: She's leaving!
Hallelujah!

Now, let's see.
I got my sweaters, my dress,
your new Walkman.

And I still got room
for the trophy.

What time are you gonna
get up in the morning?

Oh, the bus is supposed
to leave at :.

Oh, by the way, if you
get a chance, stop by
the church this Sunday.

Reverend Taylor's gonna be
preaching while we're gone.

Oh, Lord, I'm sure
gonna miss that man.

You really like him,
don't you?

Reverend Taylor?
They don't make 'em
like him no more.

He made that church
what it is today.

That is except
for the heating unit.

Florence!
Eula!

Child, what are you doing
out in this night air?

You gonna catch
a cold and cough
all the way to Canton.

Oh, that's just it, Florence.
There isn't going
to be a Canton.

There isn't going to be
a competition.

What do you mean,
no competition?

Oh, at least not
for us anyway.

The bus driver
stopped by Reverend
Daniels' place just now

to pick up the deposit
for the trip.

Yeah?
And the man was
gone, Florence.

Gone.

Clothes, furniture,
and every penny we'd saved
to get us to Canton.

Now, Velma, calm down.
Listen, listen.

I don't know what happened.

Florence is out now trying
to get all the details.

But as soon
as she gets back...

Well, hold it a second.
She just came back.

Velma.

Hello, Velma.

What happened?

I don't know.
He just left town.

Go ahead, Velma.

Did you check the church?

I checked the church
and his apartment.

Landlord didn't even
know he was gone.

I'm sorry.
Go ahead, Velma.

Did he say it was an
emergency or something?

It couldn't have
been an emergency.

The whole apartment
was cleaned out.

The landlord said
he even took furniture
that didn't belong to him.

I'm sorry.
Go ahead, Velma.

Oh, and he didn't leave
the money with someone else?

No. We checked all over.
Turned out he
fleeced everybody.

Go on, Velma.

And that's all you know?

That's all I know, and
if I find out any more,
I'll let you know.

Go on, Velma.

Velma? Velma?

Well, how rude!
She hung up.

I don't believe this.

Me neither. I mean
the man was a reverend.

Well, there must be
some logical explanation.

Don't you think so,
George?

Of course, Weez.
It's simple.

Look, the man
saw the money.

The man wanted the money.
The man skipped town
with the money.

I mean, this is
not exactly a case
for Columbo, Weez.

How could he
do this to me?

I supported him!

Look, it's been
a rough day,

and I think the best
thing for us to do is
to get some sleep.

Talking about it now
will only make it worse.

Hi, Louise. George.

Oh, there she is.
Our little songbird.

Look, we know it's late,
but we simply couldn't
allow Florence

to set foot on that bus
without a bon voyage
gift from us.

Willis.
Oh, no, no, no.

We went shopping
specifically for Florence.

We're not allowing her
to go anywhere
without this present.

Wait until you
see it, Florence.

We saw it and right away
we knew it was you.

Oh, no.
That's mine.

Uh, look in your bags, Tom.

But wait until you
see it, Florence.
It's lovely.

Ta-da!

No, dear.
That's mine, too.

Keep looking.

Oh, you're gonna
love this.
It's so... So...

Helen, I think
we forgot it.

Not that it was
that great, anyway.

I agree.
It's the ugliest thing
I ever saw.

Just hideous.
Just hideous.

Yes.
Well, good luck
anyway, Florence.

She forgot it.
I didn't.

Anyway, as I was saying,
I think we should all
get some sleep

and discuss it
in the morning.

Oh, I don't want to
sleep, Miss Jefferson.

I don't know what
I want to do.

I mean, I believed in
the man, trusted him.

And if you can't
trust a reverend,
who can you trust?

Florence, look,

why don't you
tell me about how
much it's gonna cost.

And, maybe I can...
Oh, I appreciate it,
Mr. Jefferson,

but my heart's just
not in it, you know?

Listen, try not to
let it get to you.

Another preacher
will come along.
A better one.

Oh yeah, sure.

Better let me talk
to her, Weez.

Oh, George, don't, please.

Things are bad
enough already.

Oh, come on, Weez.
Trust me this time.

Trust me.

Trust me.

Sit down, Florence.

Florence, you remember
a couple of months ago

when you were dying
to see my baby pictures
and I wouldn't let you,

so I hid 'em?

Yeah.

Do you remember where
I hid those pictures?

Yeah. You hid them
under Lionel's diploma
in the spare bedroom.

Thank you.
I've been looking
all over for those pictures.

Okay, now,
to your problem.

Florence, Florence, sit.

Okay, now Florence,
I'm not gonna lie and
say I know how you feel.

I mean, when you
have faith in somebody
and they let you down,

it's got to be rough.

But, it's not the end
of the world.

I mean,
you read the Bible.

Who would know that
any more than you?

But the man was
a minister, Mr. Jefferson.

Listen, do you remember the
story of Sodom and Gomorrah?

Yeah.

Okay. You remember how,
like, they had it all together

until Gomorrah
cut off Sodom's hair?

Now, not only did
he lose his faith,

but that also brought about
"The Wisdom of Sodom."

So he had to spend the rest
of his days sleeping
on a pillow of salt.

Who am I kidding?
I mean, you know
all this, Florence.

You're a student
of the Bible.

I'm just tryin'
to tell you, Florence,
don't look back.

Just...
Oh, I'm sorry.

I just can't listen
to no more of this.

No, that's all right,
Miss Jefferson.

He is right about
one thing.

I've been looking back.

I mean, lookin' back
was when church used
to mean something

and a minister was somebody
to be admired, you know?

But, that's all over now.

I mean, it's just
a business, a racket.

You might as well worship
First National Bank.

I've been a sucker, you know?
And you know why?

Because I've been
looking back.

Well, I'm through
looking back.

Where are you going?

To look forward.
I'm going down to that
church one last time,

and that's to get
my things.

From now on,
I'm gonna live for me.

Uh, Florence, wait.

Now, I know how much
the church means to you.

Why don't you talk
to Reverend Taylor?

Because I don't have nothin'
to say to Reverend Taylor.

If you want to talk
to Reverend Taylor,
you talk to him.

And while you're at it,
tell him that him,
Reverend Daniels, the crook,

and Florence, the sucker,
have all retired
at the same time.

Now, hold it.
I didn't tell her to go
and quit the church.

See, that's how easy people
can misinterpret the Bible.

Hello, information?

May I have the number
of a Reverend Roy Taylor,
please?

That's right, Taylor.

Well, this is it.

Here's your key
to the front door.

You already got
everything else I own.

That is, except for
the heating unit.

But I'm sure you'll
get another one.

I'm sure there's another
sucker out there somewhere.

I'm through being a sucker.

Reverend Taylor.
Sister Johnston.

Down here mighty late
this evening, aren't you?

Anything I can
help you with?

No. I just lost my
earring under this
bench during rehearsal

and I was trying
to find it.

In the dark?

With a bag full of
shoes and old sheet music?

Isn't it funny
when you're looking
for something specific,

you always run into
a bunch of stuff you
didn't know you lost?

Will you just look
at all this stuff
I didn't know I lost?

Good night,
Reverend Taylor.

Florence.

You're about to lose
your key, too.

Lord, I don't know where
my mind has been lately.

Okay. Miss Jefferson
talked to you already,
didn't she?

Would you like to?

Not particularly.
I just came to get
my stuff so I could leave.

Leave?
Where are you going?

I don't know.
Home. Out. Somewhere.

Sure won't be Ohio
though, will it?

The choir can sing anywhere.

Oh, yeah.
They got a lot to sing
about, too, don't they?

Things like hope
and love.

I tell you what.
When you're preaching
next Sunday,

why don't you see
if you can fit those words
into your sermon,

and then have
the choir back you up
with I'm Busted.

I'm sure Reverend Daniels
would just love that.

Hmm. That's funny.

You see, when I was here,
the choir never sang
to please me.

But I guess that was
back when you all sang
for the Lord.

Oh, yeah. And there was
a time when a preacher

was somebody to
be looked up to.

But I guess that was
back when they weren't
common thieves.

So now you have
no faith.

Well, let's just say
that getting
kicked in the behind

makes me a little
reluctant to bend over.

We'll just see about that.

Oh, what is this
supposed to be?
Some kind of joke to you?

Oh, no, Florence,
I'm too old to play games.

Too old to play,
too ignorant to win.

But I know you.

And I know you've got more
sense than you're letting on.

What's that
supposed to mean?

That you're not about to walk
away from something that
you gave half of your life to

just because
some fool took off
with a little money.

It ain't just the money.

He was a reverend.
A man of God.

He was a reverend.
He's not a man of God.

Oh, and I'm supposed
to know that?

We shouldn't even
have to worry about
things like that.

And what about
the next one?

What are we supposed to do,
bolt down the piano?

Check his arms
for track marks?

Watch for peep holes
in the dressing room?

What's the point in
even coming to church?

To worship the Lord.

Well, you can do that
on a subway.

And these days
it's a*t*matic.

Florence...
No, Reverend Taylor.

You just want me
to do what you want
me to do.

Want me to go to church,
praise the Lord,
and have faith.

Well, I had faith,
and what did it get me?

I could've had
a normal life, you know.

A real life.

But I gave it all up
for this place.

And you know why?

Because I thought that
this was the way.

Now I've lost time,
I've lost love,

and my money.

Now you look at me
and you tell me
what I got left.

What?

Sense enough to know
that God's name ain't
Reverend Daniels!

Sense enough to know that
you don't come to church
to worship the preacher.

And most of all,

sense enough to know
that you can't
cash faith at a bank

and have somebody
run off with it.

If just Daniels
could do that to you,

then you didn't have
much faith to begin with.

Well, reverends ain't
supposed to steal.

sh**t, I know reverends
ain't supposed to steal.

People ain't
supposed to steal.

But the last time I checked,
they were doing it anyway.

But you never stole.

Girl, what are you
talking about?

When I was a boy,
I'd grab an apple
or a hot loaf of bread

with the best of 'em.

But I never said
I was perfect.

But apparently somewhere
down the line,

Reverend Daniels said he was
and you believed him.

Well, no, but I...
No buts.

You'd better get
your gods straight.

I'd hate to see you
giving up all that love
on the wrong one.

You see, my God
never stole money from me,

so it doesn't much matter
what some man may do.

And you can forgive
him that easy?

Who, Daniels?

Here.

Girl, if it was my
$ he stole,

next time I saw him,

I'd put a knot
on his head so...

So big that
there'd be snow
covering the top of it.

But I wouldn't leave
the house of God
on account of it.

Let him do that
to you and you be
losing more than money.

And you know I'm right
or you wouldn't be crying.

Folks don't cry about
something they don't
care about leaving.

No, they don't, do they?

No, they don't.

Well, I'll think about
what you said.

You do that.

I'll be seeing you.

Any time you need me,
just call.

Oh, Florence,
I've been waiting on you.

Listen, I just called
Reverend Taylor.

Oh, it's all right,
Miss Jefferson, I know.

I just talked to him.
Everything's fine.

You talked to him?

Yeah. You know,
to tell you the truth,

I didn't think
it would work either.

But that man
always know the
right thing to say.

I tell you, Mrs. Jefferson,
good, bad or indifferent,

they sure don't
make 'em like
Reverend Taylor no more.

Did you hear
what she said, Weez?

Yeah.

Think I should
call somebody?

No, I don't think so.

What? But she
said she...
I know. I know.

But, Weez, now you made
the phone call.

How'd she have talked
to Reverend Taylor
if his sister said

that he d*ed in his
sleep four hours ago?

I don't know.
But you know something?

I almost believe her.