03x11 - Crouching Jimmy, Hidden Sheen

[bunniefuu]

Gotta Blast!

♪ Into the stars,
goin' by Candy Bar's ♪

♪ Rides a kid with a knack
for invention ♪

♪ With a super-powered mind,
a mechanical canine ♪

( barks )

♪ He rescues the day
from sure destruction ♪

♪ This is the theme song ♪

♪ For Jimmy Neutron. ♪

( mechanical whirring )

( barking )

( yells )

( voices murmuring )

What a great robe.

I like
the belt, too.

( shushing )

( gong rings loudly )

( screeching and hooting )

( joints cracking )

( grunting and thudding )

( murmuring )

( grunting )

( laughs raucously )

I am a flying boy,
so graceful.

Surely you're all jealous.

( grunting and thudding )

( applause )

This has been but
a small demonstration

of my kung fu ability.

Surely you must now make me,
Yoo Yee, your chosen one.

( laughter )

Why do you make laughing
from your mouths?

Because we already
have a chosen one,

the legendary one
who puts leg behind head.

But he is no match for me!

You even say he is an idiot.

He is, but still...
the leg behind the head.

( groaning in exasperation )

Oh... cramp, cramp.

Okay, that was embarrassing.

This meeting
is adjourned.

Wait!

There is one way.

It is written
that if the Chosen One

is defeated in pitched battle,
his conqueror takes his place.

Hmm...

now I am quietly
pondering something.

( slurping )

Tell me again

why you put your leg
behind your head

to drink milkshakes.

It relaxes me.

Some people bite their nails,

I contort myself
while drinking milk products.

You asked.

Hola, guys.

JIMMY:
Hi, Libby.

Wow, you look like
one of those "sinoritas."

Thanks.
Nick and I
are doing

the hip-hop tango
in the school
dance show.

What?!

Sheen!

What do you mean?

You're my girlfriend!

Sheen, first of all,
I'm not your girlfriend.

Second of all,
we're just dancing.

Fickletude, thy name is Libby!

What self-respecting guy

would want to be in
a stupid dance show anyway?

Oh, I would, I would!

I said
"self-respecting guy."

Well, I guess
it's your loss, Libby.

I'm a much better hip-hop
tango dancer than Nick is.

Look, there's
Nick now.

( Nick screams )

( crash )

Sheen, you've got yourself
a partner.

Huzzah!

See you tonight at 7:00.

( laughing uproariously )

( begins laughing )

Hey... why
are we laughing?

Sheen, you can't dance
to save your life.

( laughing ):
Oh, right...

Hey... wait,
that ain't funny.

It's hilarious!

Man, you wouldn't get me
in a dance recital,

not even if I was
the last kid on Earth.

Hey, Cindy.

Did you want something?

Oh... uh... no.

Jimmy, you got
to help me.

Libby will never be
my girlfriend

if she thinks I lied.

You lied.

Whose side are you on?!

Please, can't you use

some of your crazy
science mumbo-jumbo to help me?

You know,
Jim, you do have
that one machine...

The Ultra-Shock
Dance Teacher 8000?

I suppose I could...

Nah!

You've got to, Jimmy.

The only respectable dance
I know is the crazy porpoise!

Here it goes.

( squeaking )

Okay, okay,
just... stop doing that!

Can do.

( squeaks )

SHEEN:
You're the best, Jimmy.

Once Libby gets a load
of my new steps,

she'll beg me
to be her boyfriend.

If you guys go on a date,
can I come?

Maybe we could play
board games,

make dinner
and talk and laugh...

I think we're
busy that night.

Okay, maybe another time.

Ready for
your download?

SHEEN:
Hold on...

just give me a minute to...

( screaming )

So... how do you feel?

Kind of funny.

Goddard,
cue the music.

( barks )

( tango begins playing )

Whoa, Sheen, I...

CARL:
Whoa, oh, boy.

Check me out.

I'm a hip-hop-tangoing fool!

Sheen, be careful!

( Carl screams
as something clicks )

Hey Carl, I didn't know
you played castanets.

That was my scapula.

JIMMY:
The download is timed
to wear off in 24 hours,

more than enough time
to dance tonight's show.

And into
Libby's heart.

( helicopter blades whirring )

What...?!

Hey...

Jimmy!

Help!

What in the world?

Goddard, execute
emergency plan 372-Z.

( barks )

( Sheen yelling )

( screaming )

( barks )

Jimmy...

were those n-n-ninjas?

Uh-huh.

What the heck did
they want with me?

I don't know.

What do you mean
he escaped?!

Hold on,
I must talk to myself.

This Chosen One
is craftier than I thought.

Okay, I'm back
and I have a plan...

JIMMY:
Sheen, think.

Do you have any mortal enemies
with access to ninjas?

No, but I have a half-cousin
with access to the Internet.

I've developed a plan
in case the ninjas return.

What are those?

Sulfur pellets.

If the ninjas
come back,

I'll activate the
pellets remotely.

The gas should keep them
dizzy and confused

long enough for
us to grab them.

Whatever, dude.

MISS FOWL:
Sheen, you're late!

Jimmy, I don't have you
on my list of dancers.

I'm not in the show,

but it's important
that...

Uh-uh, no buts unless
you're shaking yours tonight!

There you are,
Neutron.

I know you think the show is...

Need a partner?

I'm your man.

You... are?

( yells )

Hey! Where do you...

It's okay,
Cindy and I are in the show!

So all you need to do is
catch me as I come down

from my triple-axel,
midair Betsy flip.

Uh, Neutron?
Yeah, Betsy flip,
sure, I got it.

Carl, are you monitoring
suspicious activity?

Mmm, yup.

All clear, Jim.

( applause )

Thank you, thank you,
wonderful.

Welcome to our first annual
Lindbergh Festival of Dance!

Our first performer will be
Bolbi Stroganofski

and his sister, Ignishka, in
their salute to slap dancing.

♪ Slap, slap, slap ♪

♪ Clap, clap, clap ♪

♪ Slap, slap, slap ♪

♪ Clap, clap, clap... ♪

Thank you, kids,
that was fabulous.

Bolbi, you might want
to work on that split-- oochy.

Okay, next up we have Libby
Folfax and Sheen Estevez

with the hip-hop tango.

( music begins playing )

Ninjas.

( gas hissing )

( Sheen coughing )

Wow!

This is better
than Broadway.

Sheen?

Jimmy, over here.

Good, you got Sheen;

b-but where
are the ninjas?

Yeah, and where's Libby?

Libby?

Oh, no!

The ninjas took Libby.

Neutron, where
are you going?

We're on next.

What? You're not afraid
of a few ninjas, are you?

Neutron!

I can't believe it;

my sweet, sweet Libby's
been kidnapped

and it's all my fault.

This video
was at the crime scene.

Hopefully there
will be some clues.

( gong resounds )

Greetings Chosen One.

By now my ninjas have taken
your girlfriend...

Not my girlfriend.
Shh.

She's not.

If you ever want
to see her again,

you must come
to Shangri-Llama

and fight me kung fu style.

Okay, I think that's it.

See you soon...

if you dare!

( laughs )

Why does that monk kid
want to fight me?

I don't know any
chop-socky stuff.

We have no choice
if we want to get Libby back.

Ready, Carl?

Pretty much.

Whoa, hold up-- ready for what?

I've downloaded
the basics of kung fu

onto a disk compatible
with the Dance Teacher 8000.

Now I'll just download
them into you.

Okay, just give me a second...

( screaming )

Smooth.

Now to see
if it worked.

Sheen, think fast!

Ow!

You were supposed to chop it.

Try telling me before
you throw it!

Ow! Carl!

Sheen, think fast.

Awesome.

Wing more stuff at me.

( grunts )

Here you go.

( squawking )

Let's go kick some monk.

I think this
is Shangri-Llama.

It's Shangri-Llama,
all right.

Check it out!

MONKS ( chanting ):
Chanting in unison.

Chanting in unison.

SHEEN:
Long time,
no see.

How's everybody doing?

MONKS:
Fine.

Still not wearing
pants, I see.

MONKS:
Uh-huh.

You guys rule!

HEAD MONK:
Greetings.

We have been expecting you.

Yeah, greetings.

What can you tell us
about our friend Libby?

I know no Libby.

I know only that
the Chosen One must fight
Yoo Yee in 48 hours.

And...

Should be a good fight.

Your monk snatches our friend,

threatens the Chosen One
and that's all you say?

Oh, right, I almost forgot.

Try not to get your blood
everywhere.

We just cleaned ring
last Thursday.

Come on, guys.

( Yoo Yee laughing )

Just like I planned.

The Chosen One and his friends
have come to rescue you.

They will, too, and
I'm telling them what
you've done to me.

What have I done?

I'm keeping you
in my sister's room.

Yeah, and her CD collection
is totally b*at.

Plus, ponies on the wallpaper?

Please! What am I, five?

( growls ):
I must speak to myself again.

When I am Chosen One,
I will command respect,

not like now,
where I command none.

Don't try to escape.

You are locked in
with locks on the door

that create
a locked environment.

Ooh.

Now, that's what
I'm talking about.

( Carl gasping )

My DNA tracker says Libby's
being held somewhere

on the other side
of this wall.

We're going to steal her back
before anybody has to fight.

CARL:
Whoa!

( ninjas whooping
and screeching )

YOO YEE:
Whee-hee-hee-hee!

I'm flying all around!

I'm like a crazy man-bird.

Whee!

It's Yoo Yee's temple,
and it's crawling with Ninjas.

SHEEN:
Big deal.

With my new abilities,
I can easily defeat them.

D-Does that include
the one standing
next to me?

( Carl gulps )

Uh, guys, let me handle this.

Hey, Jackie Chan, nice pajamas.

Now head back to gym class

before you get a faceful
of Sheen.

Perhaps we should give him
a taste of my abilities.

Oh, yeah, good idea.

( whooping )

Ow!

Ow!

Ow!

Okay, stop!

Ow!

Carl!

No-- your download
must be wearing off.

( giggling nervously )

Sorry about the pajama cr*ck.

They look smart on you.

( ninja yelling )

( boys exclaiming in pain )

BOYS:
Whoa!

( boys grunt )

( all groaning )

The dance machine--
it's broken to bits.

Now I'll never learn
to dirty-dance.

No, Carl, it's worse.

Libby's too well guarded.

Sheen will have
to fight Yoo Yee,

and without a download,
he's doomed.

There's only one thing to do.

SHEEN:
A tutor?

Sheen, we have
no choice.

Why not give me piano lessons
while you're at it?

( doorbell plays
"oriental" tune )

Yes.

M-Master Hong?

Yes.

Dude, don't you think

you're a bit old
to teach kung fu?

Snatch this pebble from my hand.

"Snatch a pebble"--
how...?

( groaning )

You're hired.

Master, my friend
has 24 hours

to learn kung fu
and defeat Yoo Yee.

( laughing derisively )

Impossible!

Please, Master Hong,
you have to help us.

Yeah, he's
the Chosen One.

Ooh.

The Chosen One?

Put your leg
behind your head.

( grunts )

Ooh.

A thousand pardons,
Chosen One.

Come.

I will be honored
to teach you
what I know.

Carl, you help
with Sheen's training.

I'll see about repairing
the dance machine.

He who masters patience,
masters all.

Try to catch carp
using only hand.

Right.

Concentrate mind.

Become the stream.

You must feel the...

I got him!

I got him.

Oh, baby, we're eating fish
tonight.

( sighs deeply )

So much for watching
lady wrestling
on Pay-Per-View.

Moving on.

( Sheen yelling )

( screams )

( yells )

( grunting )

Mmm! Mmm!

Carl! Why you little...

Come back here!

( blows hitting )

Now rise, Chosen One.

Rise!

( grunting )

Concentrate.

( grunting )

I can't do it, Master Hong.

It is because you lack
the eye of the tiger.

Eye of
the tiger?

Sounds fattening.

Quiet, Carl!

Where's an
eye-of-the-tiger store?

Eye of the tiger
cannot be bought!

You must feel it in your heart.

Without it,
you cannot defeat Yoo Yee.

JIMMY:
We'll take
our chances.

Sheen, it's time.

Thank you, Master Hong.

Nice boys.

Gonna be a short fight.

JIMMY:
I managed to reconstruct the
dance machine as best I could.

Carl, do you have
the kung fu disk?

Oh, I was afraid of that.

Without a proper conductor chip,

the current will overload
the circuit board.

Sheen, it looks like
you're on your own.

Chosen One!

Here we go, guys.

This is for Libby.

( gasps ):
Oh, no.

Sheen's fighting Yoo Yee?

Oh, he doesn't have a chance.

( neck bones cracking )

Prepare to meet your fate,
Chosen One.

No "How was your flight,

what hotel are you staying at,
Chosen One?"

He is mocking my social
skills in public.

I will show him no mercy.

You're talking out loud.

We all hear you.

( roars )

( gong clangs )

( spectators cheering
and yelling )

( yelling )

Get back here!

( Yoo Yee yelling )

I can't look.

( yelling )

LIBBY:
Guys! Guys!

Libby?

I escaped
from a room.

Anything I can do?

No, I'm afraid...

Libby, is that a ruby
on your head?

Yeah, but I'm not sure
it's your color.

You're more sapphire.

No, rubies are
an aluminum oxide
mineral.

It'd make the perfect
conductor for
the dance machine.

( yells )

( groaning )

Whee-hee-hee-hee!

What is the matter, Chosen One?

Can't you fly?

Oh, all you can do is bend
your leg behind your head!

( roars )

( gong clangs )

( moaning )

Sheen, how many fingers
am I holding up?

November?

Carl, we don't have
a lot of time.

Put in the kung fu disk.

Right.

( mumbling )

Commencing download.

( screaming )

Huh?

Libby.

Hey, where am I?

Sheen, listen to me.

You're in Shangri-Llama
fighting Yoo Yee.

Cool!
Am I winning?
Well...

Define "winning."

( gong clangs )

ALL:
Go, Sheen!

CARL:
Let him have it!

( knuckles cr*ck )

( ballet music playing )

( jazz playing )

Carl, you put in
the dance disk!

I... He...

B-But I was nervous and
the different colors and I...

Dance, Sheen!

Dance for your life!

Come here, dancing boy!

( Sheen groaning )

Tap-dance as fast as you can!

( blows hitting )

Sheen's doomed.

Ouch!

Sheen, put a hurting
on this fool!

You hear me? This is your
girlfriend talking!

( echoing ):
Girlfriend!

Girlfriend!

Girlfriend!

Girlfriend!

( tiger growling )

( Sheen screaming )

( Eastern European dance
playing )

( jig playing )

( square dance music playing )

♪ Swing your partner
round and round ♪

♪ Then hurl him down
onto the ground. ♪

( monks cheering )

Sheen, you did it!
Way to go!

( roars )

You think this is over?!

( yelling )

( Yoo Yee grunts )

Cindy? But when
did you...?

How did you...?
When did you...?

If I want to do my triple-axel,
midair Betsy flip,

then I'm going to do my
triple-axel, midair Betsy flip!

Oh, and the hover car needs gas.

( clinking cup )

HEAD MONK:
To the Chosen One!

Long may he put his leg
behind his head.

To the Chosen One!

ALL:
Chosen One!

Thank you! I'd like to say

I couldn't have done it
without you guys.

I'd like to say that,
but none of you were any help.

MONKS:
Uh-huh.

He's got
that right.

Okay, enough
sitting around.

Let's kick it!

( techno dance music playing )

Relax, Jimmy.

It was probably just a case
of mistaken...

Ow!

MAN:
Cut.

( Cindy groans )

WOMAN:
Cut!

( laughing )

( laughter )

I'm a flying boy.

So graceful.

Surely you are all jealous.

( squeals )

( thud )

( screaming )

Put your leg
behind your head.

( laughs )

That's going to hurt
in the morning.

Moving on.

Okay.

( laughter )

Hi, I'm Paul.

JIMMY:
Got to blast!