in my house, Mo, but
what's wrong with breakfast at your house?
Ever since I chipped a tooth
on my mama's oatmeal,
I've chosen to dine elsewhere.
Man, this is a nice jacket.
Isn't this a nice jacket?
Hey, that's a really nice jacket.
Oh, cool. Well,
I'll take credit card or cash.
In fact, why don't you give me
your discover card.
That way you can get cash back on that.
You know, Marcus, as your father,
I'm happy to give you money
for the essential things in life,
like food and medicine and-- and--
actually, that just about covers it.
Wow. You guys get medicine?
Hey, Dad, do haircuts fall under that?
Yes. Haircuts would be essential.
-Good. I need $.
-$?
Yeah. That's how much
a good haircut costs.
Well, how much is a bad haircut?
I think you're missing
Dad's whole point here, okay?
Now, we shouldn't be buggin' him
about stupid stuff like haircuts.
Now, a jacket with a big eight-ball on it,
that's an investment.
Okay, now, look, I just shelled out $
so T.J. could go to
geology camp this week,
so the cash machine is closed.
From now on, if y'all want
the finer things in life,
and by "the finer things" I mean
anything that costs more than $,
you're gonna go out and get a job, get
your own money, and pay for it that way.
-What?
-A job?
You heard him. You guys gotta start
pulling your weight around here.
There any more bacon?
♪ Every day's another lesson ♪
♪ And my head's in a whirl ♪
♪ If I make a wrong decision ♪
♪ It's not the end of the world ♪
♪ I will reach my destination ♪
♪ Make mistakes from a to z ♪
♪ With each mistake there's a new lesson ♪
♪ I can be anything you want to be ♪
-♪ Never experiencing a dumb phase
-Smart guy ♪
♪ He's ahead of the game at a young age ♪
♪ The intelligence of a grown man ♪
♪ Trapped inside of a young brain ♪
♪ He's a bit on the short side ♪
♪ But stands tall when you show the ball ♪
♪ That's why I'm hanging
With the smart guy ♪
♪ AKA Mr. know-it-all ♪
♪ Smart guy ♪
♪ Yeah ♪
Hey, hey, listen to this.
Here's a good job.
It says, "travel and earn
thousands of dollars."
What do you got to do?
Marry a guy in Alaska.
Is there any cooking involved?
I thought Marcus was the one that
had to get the job.
I'm lookin', too.
Last night I asked my dad for some money
to take a date to the Red Lobster,
and he gave me one of these looks.
I mean, man, what are parents
gonna have us for
if they're not gonna pay for the upkeep?
Are y'all still complaining about money?
We'll stop for bucks.
Why don't you do what we're doing
and get a real job?
There's other stuff in there besides
"make love to beautiful women,
earn big bucks."
How'd we miss that one?
I called. There's some fine print.
You don't want to know, bro.
Well, there's a new Stylo store at the
Liberty Hills Mall,
and they're looking for sales people.
We're going to apply after school.
Ah, so your pops cut you off, too?
No. I'm saving up so I can hitchhike
through Europe this summer.
Imagine...
I'm walking on a roadside in Provence
when a handsome young stranger stops
to give me a lift.
What I don't know at the time
is that he's the young Baron Rothschild
on his way to a baccarat
tournament in Monaco,
and he wants me along because...
my beauty seems to him, a poem.
I don't think that's gonna happen.
Okay. So I meet some Greek kid on a bus
and we make out like weasels.
Either way, it's the trip of a lifetime.
You know, I'm / Greek.
Good for you.
Uh, tout á l'heure, guys.
We'll send you a postcard from Europe.
Oh, ho, now, I think I found it.
Listen to this-- "area radio station
seeks dynamic personalities
for early morning on-air hosts."
They're not gonna hire us.
It says no experience necessary.
We got loads of that.
And it says it's a talk station.
Hello there. You're on the air with Mo.
What are you wearing?
So you're both seniors at Piedmont.
Yes. I know we don't have
a lot of experience,
but when it comes to retail,
we know our stuff.
Just ask us anything.
Alright. Return policy.
All items must be returned
within days with a receipt.
If they don't have a receipt, all tags
must be on the garment.
If you paid cash, you can receive
cash in exchange.
If you paid by check,
you can get cash in days
or we can have a check sent to your home.
Wow. You are good.
But you forgot the most important part.
You can't return underwear,
'cause that's just nasty.
Bravo, girls. You're hired.
-Yeah!
-Yeah!
Can you start immediately?
-Yes.
-Great.
Yvette, I need you to go in the back
and count a shipment of pants
we just received.
You'll find the sales slip on the box.
Gotcha, boss.
I have a boss.
Do you want me to handle the register,
'cause I can.
Not just now.
You see that guy over there
by the pocket T's?
Yes. Do you want me to help him,
'cause I can.
If he asks. For now, just kind of
stick close to him.
We don't want anything stolen, now, do we?
Now, see... we just didn't find a job,
but we found a career.
Look, I listen to talk radio all the time.
I've never heard of this station.
Well, it's not one
of your stronger signals.
If you don't get the exact right
spot on the dial,
it kind of bleeds into bullfighting
on a Spanish station.
You guys didn't pay for some kind of
training program, now, did you?
Oh, no, no, no. In fact, we're gettin'
paid a handsome salary.
Well, a salary with a good personality.
Well, now, that sounds great.
So when do I get to hear you guys?
Well, you just settle back
in your easy chair at : a.m,
you hold the antenna just right, and
prepare to have your thoughts provoked.
: till when? :. And if we do well,
we get midnights to : on Sundays.
So, um, what do you say, Pops?
No.
How come?
Look, you're in school. You need sleep.
Find a job between : and : p.m.
Now, see, if we were in the marines,
we'd have to obey that order.
But see, this is peace time,
so we gonna take that job.
How you gonna get around your dad?
Oh, man, don't worry about him.
He goes to bed at :
right after The Cajun Cook,
and he don't get up till :.
Okay, so look, we'll leave the house,
do the show,
and be back before he even knows about it.
But when are we gonna sleep?
In geometry class like we always do.
Well, it's : in the A.M,
And we're still waiting for your calls.
Any calls.
Yeah. Our phone lines are still wide open.
Okay!
In the meantime, I guess we're gonna go
to our community bulletin board.
You got that, right, Mo?
Yeah. Let's see, most of these
we've done already.
Pancake breakfast at the masonic lodge.
Don't do dr*gs. Can't say that enough.
Thats right!
Oh, here's one. "the trolley town players
presents
Fred "rerun" Barry and Mary Lou Retton
in Love Letters.
Tickets are available."
And, uh, we have a call.
We do?
You're on with Marcus and Mo. Hello.
Hey, guys, it's Mackey.
Hey. It's Mackey...
Again.
What's on your mind, Mackey?
Yo, okay, so there was this good
Deep Space on tonight.
You guys see it?
Yeah, there was this alien that looked
like a snake, and... I can't sleep.
So you want to return the sweaters
and exchange the shirt?
I'll need your original sales receipt.
I would like to return this suit.
It says one size fit all,
but it doesn't fit me.
Perhaps I can get somebody
to help you. Nina.
Nobody leave. I work on commission.
-Nina!
-Oh! You scared me.
Why are you over here playing
hide and seek?
I need your help at the register.
-I can't right now.
-Why not?
-I don't want to tell you.
-Yes. Tell me.
Alright.
I have to follow black people around
and make sure they don't steal.
This is gonna put a crimp
in our friendship.
It's not my idea.
Miss Hendra told me to do it.
As she sees it, "black people steal.
They just do."
So it is my happy task to stem
this tide of larceny
by watching them
while they're in the store.
Do me a favor-- take the register.
[knocking]
Hi. I'm sorry to bother you,
but can we talk?
Oh, sure, honey. Have a seat.
I may need to stand.
What's up?
This is the oddest thing. I mean...
it's downright unbelievable, actually.
Nina seems to think that you want her
to follow black customers
around the store to stop them
from stealing?
Oh, no, no, no, no. No,
I just told Nina to follow suspicious
looking people.
And who are suspicious looking people?
Well, they tend to be young, carry
large bags, urban.
Urban?
This is Washington, D.C. We're all urban.
Very few farmers in the store.
Look, Yvette, I've been in this business
a long time,
and I've found that most people
who shoplift tend to be...
well, minorities.
I wish it were otherwise,
but that's the way it is.
So this practice of following
black people, is this a company policy?
No, not exactly.
But the company hired me
because they trust my judgment,
-and they value my experience.
-But--
Look, I'm not saying
all black people steal,
and I'm certainly not targeting them
because I dislike them.
I don't.
After all, I hired you, didn't I?
-Yeah.
-Good.
Now, let's get on with our work.
Well, if it isn't
my money-making daughter.
How'd your day go, baby?
[slam]
I take it not too good.
You could say that.
I found out that my boss told
Nina to follow
black people around the store
so they don't steal.
What?
Yes. Apparently we have
the shoplifting gene.
Okay.
Get your coat.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
I know that face. That's your
"I'm gonna go kick some butt" face.
No, it isn't. It's my "calm,
going to talk to somebody" face.
You don't have one of those.
It's new. I'm trying it out.
Wait a minute. Okay, listen.
Dad, aren't you the one
who's always telling us that
we have to learn to solve
our own problems?
Yes, but I really want to help you
with this one.
I know you do, but this one is mine.
Okay.
So what are you gonna do?
Well, the way I see it, Miss Hendra
is just ignorant and misinformed,
and once I show her that she's wrong,
I think she'll change her mind.
And how are you gonna do that?
I don't know, but something
will come to me.
I'm sure it will.
Meanwhile, I'm just gonna go down
to the mall and have a teriyaki bowl.
No.
Stay.
Hey, Washington, we are back
and still waiting for your calls.
It's open topic hour.
Anything you want
to talk about, just call.
Whatever's on your mind,
just send it to your lips out to us.
Here--hey! We have a call.
You're on the air, caller.
H-hi. Mo?
First-time caller. L-love your show.
Love it.
Thanks. What do you want to talk about?
I don't know. What do you want
to talk about?
I don't know. The caller picks the topic.
Uh... you see, uh...
Deep Space tonight?
Alright, now we got an hour
before we gotta go to school.
An hour? That's good.
I'm going to get some rest.
Cool. Cool. That's great.
I'm just gonna go upstairs and
get my snooze on.
Okay. Here I go, then.
[snoring]
[Floyd] Marcus! Yvette! Time for school!
Oh, no. My arm's asleep.
Mo!
Wha-what?
Man, you gotta get out, man.
My dad's coming down.
-Where am I?
-Come on, man.
What are you guys doing up so early?
Oh, we just wanted to get...
an early start for school.
I'm just gonna grab some orange juice,
and we'll be ready to go. Heh.
Okay.
Aren't those the same clothes
you wore yesterday?
Oh, yeah, yeah. It's a new thing
kids are doing. They call it doubling up.
Okay. Marcus, can you hand me
my lunch in there?
Uh, oh, I can't, Pop, I'm...
I'm drinking my juice.
Alright, you do that.
You guys have a nice day.
Mo... [snoring]
Mo!
Mr. Henderson, l-let me get
the door for you.
-Hey, Marcus.
-Hey.
Mo, hey, listen, does your friend Yosef
still work at the radio shack?
Mm-hmm. Yeah. Why?
I'm gonna need a couple of those
tiny surveillance cameras
and a little help from you.
Okay.
Alright, come here.
This is what I need you to do.
I need you to go get the cameras and
then meet me at the stylo store around--
[snoring]
Okay. Last camera.
Okay, we have to hurry because
she takes a short lunch.
Don't worry. There's always
a long line at the soup plantation.
Soup plantation?
Figures she'd go there.
Hello, girls.
Miss Hendra, you're back from
the plantation early.
I mean, the soup place.
Oh, there was a long line,
so I just grabbed a burger.
What are you doing up there?
My new hat display. What do you think?
I like it.
Really?
Continuing our trip
through the dictionary.
Thyroxine.
an amino acid used
to treat thyroid disorders.
Oh. Oh.
Tibetan.
a native or inhabitant of Tibet.
Really?
Something's wrong with the phone.
No. We have a call.
Oh! Alright.
What's up?
[Floyd] Marcus, get your
behind home right now.
Dad?
[Floyd] Good guess.
Well, how'd you know we were here?
[Floyd] Come on,
you and Mo asleep in my kitchen
wearing the same clothes
two days in a row?
Plus it's : in the morning,
I'm looking at your bed,
and your butt ain't in it.
Uh, Mr. Henderson, I don't think
you can say "butt" on the radio.
[Floyd] News flash, Mo no one's listening.
And, Marcus, your radio career is over.
Oh. Okay!
W-well, can you come pick us up?
Aw, hell.
I know you can't say the "h" word.
What's this all about, Yvette?
I want to show you something.
For the past week I've been videotaping
customers' comings
and goings in the store.
I wanted to show you that shoplifters
come in all shapes, sizes, and colors.
Yvette, you don't have to--
Just watch.
[Yvette] I asked two of my friends
to come in at the same time.
What are you trying to show me,
that your friend is a good thief?
You're--you're missing the point.
You were so busy following
the black customer
that you didn't see
what was really going on.
Which proves what?
That if you only follow black customers,
that's all you're ever going to catch.
I have hours of tape here,
and you know what?
All races shoplift.
Do you have years of tapes?
Because that's how long
I've been in retail,
and that's where I get my information.
But wait a minute.
The retail industry itself says
that the average shoplifter
is a middle-aged white woman
not unlike yourself.
You are stripping people of their dignity
because of their skin color,
and it's wrong.
Yvette, I'm sorry you feel this way,
and I would understand if you chose
not to work here anymore.
What's wrong?
I showed Hendra the tape,
and she basically showed me the door.
Even with all of that evidence right
in front of her, she still didn't see it.
So I quit.
You were right.
I wish I wasn't.
But in this world, honey,
there's always gonna be people
that can take logic and facts
and twist them to their own point of view.
So you want to go down and hit her now?
Maybe that's not the best way
to handle this.
[sniffle]
Thank you for shopping at Stylo.
-Hey, you ready to go to lunch?
-Sure.
Is it okay if I take off for lunch now?
Oh, fine. Be back in half an hour.
-Yvette.
-Miss Hendra.
Can I help you find something?
No, thanks. I'm just kind of browsing.
Oh, Okay.
-Do you like those shirts?
-Yes. They're nice.
I wonder if that other customer might
need your help.
Other customer?
Yeah. You've been so busy following me,
you didn't even notice that
other guy over there.
Well, it's a big store.
You know, it's interesting.
A girl who used to work for you
said if I came in here,
you might keep a close eye on me.
I don't think what I do
is any of your business.
Here's the funny thing--
it is my business.
My name is W.J. Reese. I'm the founder
and president of this company.
Surprise.
Well, hello again, Miss Hendra.
I see you've met Mr. Reese.
Yeah. In fact, we were just about
to go to the back
and have a little discussion about
company policy.
Follow me, Miss Hendra.
You seem to be good at that.
Dead manager walking.
-Yeah!
-Yeah!
This is so good. I am so glad
I stuck around for this.
You know, we could go from store to store,
fighting prejudice and righting wrongs.
Or we could just go have lunch.
If we see any wrongs in the restaurant,
can we right them?
Yeah.
Before we wrap up our last broadcast,
Washington, D.C.,
we just want to say it's been real.
-Good night, and peace easy.
-Peace easy.
Good evening, chocolate city.
This is Dr. Velvet
bringing you midnight thunder,
music to get you through the night.
Right now we're gonna
play you a little O'jays...
-Dad?
-Coming.
[clapper]
I'm never working for this guys again.