02x24 - Who Is Max Ledbetter, and Why Is He Saying All Those Horrible Things?

[bunniefuu]

[THE PARTRIDGE FAMILY'S
"COME ON GET HAPPY" PLAYING]

♪ Hello, world, hear the song
That we're singing ♪

♪ Come on, get happy ♪

♪ A whole lot of lovin'
Is what we'll be bringing ♪

♪ We'll make you happy ♪

♪ We had a dream
We'd go traveling together ♪

♪ We'd spread a little love ♪

♪ And then we'll keep
Movin' on ♪

♪ Something always happens
Whenever we're together ♪

♪ We get a happy feeling
When we're singing a song ♪

♪ Traveling along there's
A song that we're singing ♪

♪ Come on, get happy ♪

♪ A whole lot of lovin'
Is what we'll be bringing ♪

♪ We'll make you happy ♪

♪ We'll make you happy ♪

♪ We'll make you happy ♪

[♪♪♪]

Okay, Tracy,
make a wish and blow.

I did it, and my wish came true.

What did you wish for?
I wished for a cake.

Figures.

[♪♪♪]

Tracy wants to know
if her surprise is here.

Well, he just got here.

Keith Partridge,
meet Maximilian Ledbetter.

KEITH:
Max Ledbetter?

Gee, that name
sounds familiar.

That's possible. Before he
retired from show business,

Max was a very well-known
psychic.

Right. Sure, I remember
when I was a kid

I used to see you
on TV all the time.

You did some
pretty amazing things.

Thank you. My predictions
were percent correct.

Of course, you, uh...

You did make some
pretty weird predictions.

I remember one, um...

something about
a horde of beetles

invading the earth
or something.

Well, that prediction came true.
It did?

Sure. Their names were John,
Paul, George and Ringo.

[LAUGHING]
Come on, son.

I received vibrations
from your locket, Tracy.

I see your birthday
party last year.

Oh, you were crying.

You're holding your leg.

No, no, no, you're
holding your knee.

Why, that's true, remember?

She fell down
and skinned her knee.

[CLAPPING]

KEITH:
Hey, hey, that's amazing.

Mr. Ledbetter, I'd like you
to make a prediction.

How am I gonna do in
the basketball game tonight?

I see a gym.

I see victory for your team.

I see people
crowded around Keith.

You're going to do something
which will make them very happy.

You mean,
I'm gonna win the game?

No, he means you're
gonna quit the team.

[LAUGHING]

[SIGHS]

[CHEERING]

[WHISTLE BLOWS]

Coach, I twisted my ankle.
Oh, no.

I don't have
a replacement for you.

Everybody's fouled out.
I'm sorry, coach.

COACH:
It's okay, Peterson.

Partridge.
Yes, coach?

You're all I have left.
I am?

Maybe I should play
with my bad ankle, coach.

No, Peterson.

Partridge.
Yeah.

Throw the ball inbounds.
Okay.

Now, listen, team,
we only have

nine seconds
to make a basket or we lose.

So everybody look alive.
Let's go.

[WHISTLE BLOWS]

CROWD [CHANTING]:
Five, four...

...three, two, one.

[BUZZER SOUNDS]

[CHEERING]

[♪♪♪]

[♪♪♪]

"And in the final seconds,

"Keith Partridge made
a spectacular half-court sh*t

to win the game
for San Pueblo High."

Well, Danny, how come

you haven't zinged me
about the game last night?

I'll have to admit, you've
never played a better game.

That gives you a season
total of two points.

It doesn't make any difference
how long he played.

He won the game.

I'm very proud of you, honey.
Thanks, Mom.

If I hadn't seen it,
I would never have believed it.

Well, I'll admit it
was a lucky sh*t,

but what amazes me
is that

it's exactly what
Maximilian predicted.

What does
"predicted" mean?

In this case, "predicted"
means "coincidence."

It's more like a miracle.

Mom, it couldn't have
been a coincidence.

It happened exactly like
he said it would.

Reuben, you've known the man
for years, is he a fake?

I don't know.

Another in-depth character
analysis by Mr. Kincaid.

Look, I don't believe
in all that stuff.

Max has made some
uncanny predictions.

He's spooky.

If he is a fraud,
I don't know how he does it.

Well, if he's so good,
how come he retired?

Well, he didn't like
show business.

He made enough money to open
his own store, then he quit.

Look, I think Max
is a very nice man

and an excellent showman,

but I don't think
he has any powers.

Well, Mom is certainly
not a believer.

Yup. That's exactly why
we shouldn't tell her our plan.

Yeah, I guess--

What plan?

Our plan to get Max
to predict the stock market.

If it's our plan,
how come I haven't heard of it?

You weren't ready.

Now, I've been watching
this certain penny stock,

and if Max gives me the word,
I'm going to invest a fortune.

Twelve, maybe bucks.

[SIGHS]

I'm sorry, Max, but the bank
wants the money by Friday.

But you can't foreclose.

The bakery is all I have.

Max, it isn't my decision.

You haven't paid the bank
a cent in three months.

Look, what if I don't
pay my other bills this month,

then I would give the bank,
uh, $ .

Max...
That means I owe the bank $ .

I'm sorry, Max.
They want it all.

Well, I'll see you Friday.
Wait a minute.

Please give this pumpernickel
bread to your wife, will you?

[♪♪♪]

Thanks, Max.

[PHONE RINGING]

Hello.

DANNY:
Danny Partridge here.

Oh, please, Danny, please.

I'm really not in the mood
to talk.

You know, everything you've
said so far has come true.

And I'd like you to make
one more prediction

about the stock market.

Danny, please, I really--

Keith and I have amassed small
fortune. We'd like to invest.

A small fortune?

Um...

I think I'm getting vibrations.

Uh, I can't do it on the phone,

but I think
you should not invest.

I see a dark cloud overhead.
Over me?

Uh, no, no, no.
Someone very close to you.

Over my family?
I don't want to talk about it.

Look, you can't predict
a disaster for my family

and not tell me what it is.

Even if you come to my house,

Elm Street, tonight,
I won't tell you.

What time shouldn't I be there?

Eight o'clock.

[♪♪♪]

Hmm.

Mom, you shouldn't be using
a sharp Kn*fe like that.

You might cut yourself.

Danny, it isn't a Kn*fe,
it's a potato peeler.

Oh. Well, I guess
it's okay then.

Worst you could do
is give yourself a flesh wound.

But you should
sterilize it, though.

Thank you very much,
Dr. Welby.

I just don't want anything
to happen to you.

Mom, is there something
wrong with Danny?

I don't think so. Why?

Well, he's acting peculiar.

He's just done something he's
never done in his whole life:

He was nice to me.

What brought that on?
I don't know.

He warned me about
being careful,

like he actually
was worried.

For a second there
he almost acted human.

Well, I'm sure
he'll get over that.

Strange though. Maybe
something is bothering him.

He just asked me
to sterilize my potato peeler.

What?
He was afraid I would-- Ow!

I did.

Oh, Mom, you think Danny
knows something we don't?

[CHUCKLING]

[♪♪♪]

I need absolute quiet.

Do you have a headache?
Shh.

[WHISPERING]
He's obviously in a trance.

I see numbers and colors.

One, four, two-- No.

One, five, six, green.

One, five, six, green.

A black cloud

is hanging over Friday.

Friday. We have
a concert on Friday.

I'm back.

Where am I?
Did I say anything?

You mean you don't know?

I was in a trance.

See, I told you
he was in a trance.

KEITH:
didn't make much sense.

One-- One, five, six, green?

The spirits must be
trying to give us a clue,

but what-- What--
What could it be?

It seems to me, when you put
numbers and green together,

it could only mean one thing,
money.

Of course, $ . .

He didn't mention a decimal.

$ ?

You also said there'd be

a black cloud hanging
over us Friday,

and we have a
concert on that day.

It would be dangerous to go

unless we figure out the clues.

Where does the money come in?

Holding a personal object
helps me get the vibrations.

If I can hold the money,

the vibrations
will give me the answer.

Sounds logical.

You want us to give you $ ?

I just want to hold it.
I write you a receipt.

That $ seems to me
the key to everything,

but I sense I must have it
by Friday.

Keith, we can't gamble
with our family.

They're worth
a lot more than $ .

Even Tracy.

[♪♪♪]

[♪♪♪]

Mom.

I need some school supplies
and I don't have any money.

I was wondering if I could get
an advance on my allowance.

That's possible. How much
of an advance do you want?

Six years.

[♪♪♪]

Did you ask Mr. Kincaid
for money?

Yeah.

Yeah, on one hand I suppose
I was pretty successful.

It's hard to make
Reuben laugh.

I knew he wouldn't
give it to you.

That's why I came up with
an idea to raise money.

You and I are
going into business.

What kind of business?

Trust me.

[♪♪♪]

Oh, you wouldn't.

Step right up, folks.

Get your Keith Partridge
kisses. Right here. Right here.

[GIRLS SHOUTING]

Ten cents, cents,
one thin dime.

I didn't collect
one thin dime.

That's the last time
I'll trust a mob.

I'm lucky to be alive.

Oh, don't be so melodramatic.
Nobody ever d*ed from kissing.

Yeah, how about a trampling?
A dime a kiss.

Well, I figured when

you're dealing with
an inferior product,

you have to
sh**t for volume.

Hey, Danny,

if I were in a better mood,
I'd b*at you up.

The concert's tomorrow.
We can't get the money in time.

[♪♪♪]

Wait a minute.

Wait a minute.

We don't need to
raise the money at all.

Solution is simple.

There will be no concert
if you and I get sick.

Look, I just don't know
anything about it,

and so I can't tell you.

Okay. Okay, I'll ask
and tell you tomorrow at school.

Bye, Myrna.

Who was that?

Myrna Livingcot.

She wanted to know if Keith's
kissing booth was still open.

She said something about
having $ worth of dimes.

Kissing booth?

What would Keith be doing
with a kissing booth?

Shirley, sometimes you ask
silly questions.

Well, I can't see Keith
charging money for a kiss.

He's too eager
to give them away.

I mean, let's face it,
his lips are a pushover.

Well, he could need money.

He tried to borrow $ from me.

[CHUCKLING]

It's hard to make me laugh.

You know, Keith and Danny

have been acting rather strange
the last couple days.

Yeah. First they're so overly
concerned about our welfare,

and now all this
money thing.

Danny wanted an advance
in his allowance.

What's so strange about that?

Six-year advance?
That's strange.

Why would they
need so much money?

I really don't know,

but I think it's time
I found out.

[MOANS]

Mom, burning
in my stomach.

Oh, my extremities
are freezing.

Throbbing in my chest.

[COUGHING]

Hacking cough,
sore throat, hot flashes.

My legs are numb.

Don't you feel well?

[SIGHS]

No, I'm a little
under the weather.

Mom, I don't think I--

I can do the concert
tomorrow night.

That's funny,
I just talked to Danny.

Seems he's sick too.

We probably have
the same thing.

Probably.
Danny claims he has leprosy.

[♪♪♪]

[SIGHS]

Leprosy? Why couldn't
he settle for the flu?

Get dressed,
come downstairs.

[♪♪♪]

Why did you say leprosy,
you dummy?

DANNY:
my flu sh*t.

Okay, out with it.

Out with what?
For the past two days,

you two have been running
around like cat burglars

and now it seems, for some
strange reason, you need $ .

And you're pretending
to be sick

to get out
of the concert.

Out with it.

It's personal, Mom.

Keith, nothing's personal
that involves the rest of us.

[SIGHS]

If you're in some
kind of trouble,

maybe I can help you out.

Look, if we
told you the truth,

you wouldn't
believe us anyway.

Would you at least try me?

[SIGHS]

Mom, if we go to that concert,
we're all gonna bite it.

Bite what?
The dust.

Where did you get
a crazy idea like that?

It's true, Mom.
Max predicted it.

Oh, he did?

Don't tell me.

Um, he also predicted
that the $

would prevent this
from happening, right?

Well, he was gonna
give us a receipt for it.

I mean, he wasn't gonna keep it.
Reub--

I'll get Max.

[♪♪♪]

A hundred and fifty-six dollars?

Believe me,
I'm not being rude if I say

that I don't know
what you're talking about.

The $ to stop
the calamity.

Calamity?

[CHUCKLES]

How can money
stop calamity?

There seems to be a range of
difference in the stories here.

Mr. Ledbetter, I am going
to find out the truth.

KINCAID:
a misunderstanding somewhere.

I know Max.

He may not be a psychic,
but he's not a thief.

And my brothers aren't liars.

Look, you hit us with this
cock-and-bull story

about a calamity,
and I'm beginning

to realize what fools
we were to believe you.

DANNY:
we had faith in you.

Now why don't you tell
my mom the truth.

Mrs. Partridge,
you want to know the truth?

Okay. The truth.

[♪♪♪]

I'm a fraud, a fake,
a reluctant almost-thief,

but my prediction about
the calamity was true.

Except it was my calamity.
What do you mean?

I worked in show business
for a long time

to get the money
to buy this bakery.

It's all I wanted,

and Friday they're going
to take it away from me.

Mr. Ledbetter,
I'm very sorry about that,

but it's still no excuse.

I was desperate, Mrs. Partridge.
I did a terrible thing.

I wish Keith and Danny

would have come to me
with this sooner,

but I do understand
the reasons now.

I worked all my life
for what I have.

Would you be willing
to work again?

What?

We're playing the San Pueblo
Auditorium this weekend.

[SIGHS]

Reuben, do you think
you could get Max on the bill?

Yeah, I bet I could.

[♪♪♪]

[APPLAUSE]

Thank you.
Thank you very much.

Now, for my last prediction--

No, this is not
really a prediction

because I know you will
all enjoy the Partridge Family.

[PLAYING
"YOU DON'T HAVE TO TELL ME"]

♪ You don't have to tell me ♪

♪ Whose been knocking down
Your door ♪

♪ It's not the first time ♪

♪ No, we've been there before ♪

♪ I only call you ♪

♪ To let you know ♪

♪ Ahh ♪
KEITH: ♪ I haven't seen you ♪

♪ And I miss you so ♪

♪ You don't have
To stand there ♪

♪ And tell me that you
Love me or anything ♪

♪ There've been too many things
We've been faking ♪

♪ Faking ♪

♪ You don't have to
Play no games ♪

♪ Or think of reasons
To call me names ♪

♪ It's the last call
That I'm making ♪

♪ Ooh ♪

♪ Honey, don't mislead me ♪

♪ Just tell me how you feel ♪

♪ Well, if you
Don't need me ♪

♪ Hey, it's no big deal ♪

♪ Okay, I'm lying ♪

♪ Right through my teeth ♪

♪ And I'm dying ♪

♪ Underneath ♪

♪ Let's get together ♪

♪ Whoa, baby, please ♪

♪ Let's get together ♪

♪ I'm begging on my knees ♪

♪ If it's all over ♪

♪ There's no need to cry ♪

♪ All you have to tell me
Is goodbye ♪

[APPLAUSE]

By the way,
I saw Max yesterday.

Oh? How's his
bakery doing?

Ah, great. Apparently

a lot of people
saw him at the concert.

His bakery has been
packed ever since.

Oh, that's great.
I hope it keeps up for him.

I think it will.

He, uh-- He came up with
a very clever gimmick.

Oh?
Yeah, he gives a free prediction

with every loaf
of pumpernickel.

Mom, didn't you send
the kids to bed?

About a half-hour ago.
Well, then, how come

the legs of this chair seem
to have two extra feet?

[♪♪♪]

[SIGHS]

Okay.

Oh, hi.
Oh, hi.

Danny, I thought I told you
to go to bed.

Well, I just wanted
to finish up this book.

How to Develop
Your Psychic Powers.

Do you have a headache?
No, I'm in a trance.

I seem to be seeing colors.

Yes, the color red.

Red hair.

Red hair and running feet.

Why do you suppose
they're running?

To avoid severe pain.

Well, good night, Mom.
I gotta run.

[♪♪♪]

[LAUGHING]

[♪♪♪]