04x14 - Two for the Show

[bunniefuu]

♪ Hello, world, hear
the song that we're singin'

♪ Come on, get happy

♪ A whole lot of lovin'
is what we'll be bringin'

♪ We'll make you happy

♪ We had a dream
we'd go travelin' together

♪ And spread a little lovin'
then we'd keep movin' on

♪ Somethin' always happens
whenever we're together

♪ We get a happy feelin'
when we're singin' a song

♪ Travelin' along there's
a song that we're singin'

♪ Come on, get happy

♪ A whole lot of lovin'
is what we'll be bringin'

♪ We'll make you happy

♪ We'll make you happy

♪ We'll make you happy ♪

Hi, meatball. What's going on?

I'm practicing the violin.

Cute.

"Dear Gloria my love."

It's personal.

Keith.

Hi, Shirley. Hi, Reuben.

Hi, Reuben. How
was your vacation?

Oh, fine. Just fine.

I spent a couple days
just lying in the sun,

played a little golf, took in the
sights, discovered a new act,

went for a walk
through the woods...

Wait a minute. Let's go back.

You mean the part about going
for a walk through the woods?

You know what part we mean.

You mean the part
about the new act.

That's the part.

If I remember correctly,

the last act you discovered
opened and closed the same day.

Yes. I remember them
well. The Flying Zucchinis.

Anybody can make a mistake.

Well, when are we gonna
meet this new act of yours?

Soon.

Well, why don't you
bring them for a visit?

Gosh, that's nice of you to
offer, Shirley, because I...

I brought them with me.

They're cutting a
record on Thursday.

Don't worry, Reuben. They
can stay in the guest room.

I'm sure they'll be excited
to meet Keith and me,

it might take them a
while to calm down.

Once they see that we're just normal
guys, we'll start working with them.

Hi. Hello.

Andy, David, this is
the Partridge family.

Hi.

Hi. Hi.

Don't be nervous.

I'm David.

I'm Andy.

Laurie, we think
you're terrific.

Really?

♪ I'll never let you see

♪ The way my broken
heart is hurting me

♪ I've got my pride
and I know how to hide

♪ All my sorrow and pain

♪ I'll do my crying in the rain

♪ If I wait for cloudy skies

♪ You won't know the rain
from the tears in my eyes

♪ You'll never know
that I still love you so

♪ Though the heartaches remain

♪ I'll do my crying in the rain

♪ Raindrops falling from heaven

♪ Could never
wash away my misery

♪ Never wash it, wash it away

♪ But since we're not together
I'll look for stormy weather

♪ To hide these tears
I hope you'll never see

♪ Hide these tears I
hope you'll never see

♪ Someday when my crying's done

♪ I'm gonna wear a
smile and walk in the sun

♪ I may be a fool

♪ But till then, darling,
you'll never see me complain

♪ I'll do my crying in the rain

♪ I'll do my crying in the rain

♪ I'll do my crying in the rain

♪ I'll do my crying in the rain

♪ Crying in the rain ♪

San Pueblo must be a pretty
neat town to have a place like this.

Yeah. Do you come here a lot?

Well, not a lot. Just
on special dates.

Hi, Laurie. Hi, Mike.

Haven't seen you here since you
brought Chris and Tracy in last week.

What are you doing,
babysitting again?

She's my date.

Mine, too.

Sorry.

What will you kids have?

I'll have a root beer.

What about you guys?

A double fudge sundae.
A double fudge sundae.

Can I bring you matching spoons?

That was just a little
ice-cream humor.

Sometimes it isn't easy.

I can see that.

Do you believe most people
can't even tell us apart?

Really?

I don't understand.
I can tell us apart.

That's what I like
about you, Laurie.

You're not like most people.

Well, I'm glad you feel
comfortable around me, Andy.

I'm David.

I'm Andy.

I'm sorry.

♪ Looking for a good
time Looking for a good time

♪ Looking for a good time
Looking for a good time ♪

That was great.

Well, thanks.

Okay, kids, that's
enough for today.

Laurie, we need to talk to you.

What about?

Us.

Us?

Well, it looks like this is
gonna be a personal talk.

I think I better go make lunch.

Maybe you should sit down.

I should?

Laurie, you have
to make a choice.

A choice?

Him or me?

I see.

We can't go along
both taking you out.

You've got to choose between us.

I don't know what to say, David.

I'm Andy, he's David.

Sorry.

Well? Go ahead. Choose.

Well, it's not all that easy.

Why not?

Because you're both great guys.

We could flip a coin.

For the first time
in a long while,

I think I'll have to have a talk
with my mother. Excuse me.

They want you to do what?

Choose between them.

For what, a sock hop?

You'll just have to tell
them you're too old for them.

That's not so easy, Mom.

Shirley, it's not all that
serious. They're young.

You know how it is
when you're young.

No, Reuben, maybe you better
give me a quick refresher course.

Well, for one thing, when you're
their age, crushes come and go.

And I'd say theirs will go
before you can say Sandra Dee.

Annette Funicello.

Hi. Hi.

Hi. Hi.

Laurie, we've
come to a decision.

I thought I was the one
that was trying to decide.

Well, we decided
to help you decide.

We figured you can't make an objective
decision when we're so much alike.

So, from now on, we're
going to be different.

We're gonna dress
different, think different.

Be different.

David, maybe you better wait.

We know what you're
gonna say, Mrs. Partridge,

but this is love and
where love's at stake...

No price is too high.

Kids will be kids, Shirley.

Mr. Kincaid, we're not going
to perform together anymore.

Right, from now on,
we're each a single.

Bye. Bye.

Like you said, Reuben,
kids will be kids.

Hi, Shirley, Laurie.

Hi, Reuben. Hi, Reuben.

Any change today?

No, they're still in love.

Yeah, but we've
got to do something.

The recording session's
set for the day after tomorrow.

Reuben, don't tell me
you're thinking of the money.

Okay, I won't tell you, but I
am thinking about the money.

Those kids could be big, but
this crush could ruin their careers.

Then why don't you talk to
them? Nothing I say works.

As a matter of fact, I
have talked to them.

And?

They want me to ask you
which one has the cutest eyes.

Hi. Hi.

Hi. Hi.

Looks like everyone's
crushed over the crush.

Say, you really do
have a way with words.

Did you ever think of
getting a job in a library?

You would make a great bookend.

You wouldn't say that if you knew
our plan to solve this whole problem.

I couldn't care less
about your plan.

What is it? Oh, no.

The last plan they came up
with was illegal in seven states.

Okay.

But if you decide that you
need our help, just let us know.

Never.

It wouldn't hurt you to
hear them out, you know.

Mom, I promised myself that I
would never stoop that low again.

And what do you want
me to tell David and Andy?

About their cute eyes.

You better start stooping.

Check.

That's my knight, you mullet.

Yeah. Sorry.

Hi. Can I come in?

Sure. How's it going?

How's what going?

Trying the old
play-hard-to-get routine, huh?

You wouldn't, by any chance, be
here to get our help, would you?

Of course not.

But I wouldn't mind listening to
your plan. You know, out of curiosity.

It'll cost you. Name it.

Fix me up with Belinda Payne.

Belinda Payne hates
the air you breathe.

Yeah, I know, but, well,
you could fix it. Just tell her...

Tell her she's wrong about me.

Could, but won't.

I'd settle for a buck.

Forget it.

Well, it's obvious she
doesn't want our help, Danny.

Too bad.

And to think the whole thing could be
straightened out by tomorrow afternoon.

Well, let's see. It was
your move, wasn't it?

Okay. I'll pay.

Laurie, would you like a taco?

Maybe she'd prefer a burrito.

I think I'll just
have a root beer.

I'll get it. I'll get it.

We'll both get it.

You ready? Ready for what?

You still haven't told
me what the plan is.

Trust me.

There you go.
Here's your root beer.

Thank you.

I'm having root beer, too. I
guess we have a lot in common.

I'm not so sure it's enough
to build a relationship on.

All right, now, one at a
time, just like I told you.

Root beer has always
been a favorite of mine.

Mine, too. Hey, Laurie.

Hi... Hi, kids.

Mike Weejack's the name.

Yeah.

You boys look new
around here, huh?

Yeah, you could say that.

Well, Laurie and I have had some
great times together, huh, Laurie?

Yeah, some really great times.

All right, go, Skip. And
let her know she's loved.

I will, Partridge. I will.

And then Laurie and I
went up to Muldoon's Point.

You kids have heard of
Muldoon's point, haven't you?

Sure.

Hey, Laurie, que pasa?

- Que pasa?
- Long time, no see.

Yes, long time, no see you, too.

Skip Radnitz is the name.

Don't wear it out.

We won't.

When you're through
babysitting here,

why don't you come
over to the campus club?

Yeah, a bunch of
guys will be there.

We'll have a few
laughs, play the pinball.

Sounds great.

Good. Well, I got to
split. See you later?

Later.

Hey, Skip, I'll split with you.

You boys be sure to get
to bed early, you hear?

Later, Laurie.

Much.

You know, for a minute there,

I was depressed that those
college guys were after you.

But now I see that when
you're in love, it doesn't matter.

True love is worth fighting for.

It is?

He's right. I'm ready to fight.

Me, too.

Laurie, you look like
you could use a taco.

I'll get it.

We'll both get it.

Does that mean I don't get
the cents you owe me?

That's right.

And as far as Belinda
Payne is concerned, forget it.

How were we to know it wouldn't
work, it worked for Hemmy Frock.

Mom, would you talk to them?
They would probably listen to you.

If you really want me to, honey.

It's the only way left.

Yeah, well, looks like you're
the last resort again, Mom.

Thanks a lot.

Don't worry. Mom
will take care of it.

Yeah. Moms are sort
of like the Lone Ranger.

What?

Hi, boys.

Hi, Mrs. Partridge.

Could I talk to
you for a minute?

Sure.

Is it about Laurie?

As a matter of fact, it is.

Has she made a decision yet?

Yes, she has.

Which one of us did she choose?

Neither.

I don't think I understand.

Boys, I know I'm not your mother, and
we haven't known each other very long,

but I feel I can talk to you.

Sure. Go ahead. Sure. Go ahead.

Well...

Kids your age tend to
fall in love very easily.

And sometimes even give up other
relationships for what they think is love.

Now, I know you think
you're in love with Laurie, but...

Love at your age can pass
just as quickly as it came, and...

Well, your relationship as
brothers is too much to give up

for what could be
a passing crush.

What I'm trying to say is...

What you think now will
last forever, probably won't

and what you're
sacrificing will.

You have no idea what
I'm trying to say, do you?

I'm sure it's good advice.

Whatever it is
you're trying to say.

What I'm trying to say is...

Don't forget to
wash up for dinner.

Sometimes parents are
very hard to understand.

Amen.

Well? How did it go?

You took care of
everything, right?

Well, I wouldn't go
so far as to say that.

How far would you go?

Well, I managed at least
to take care of one thing.

What?

I made sure they would
wash before dinner.

That proves it. The
Lone Ranger is a myth.

Have you seen Andy and David?

Don't tell me.

You've given up and decided to
ask them both to go steady, right?

Very funny.

But I happen to have decided to
come right out and tell them the truth,

even though it might
hurt their feelings.

That's the spirit.

You know, you would
make a fine marine.

Hi, Laurie. Your mom
said you were looking for us.

You know, I can sense
my hairdryer's running.

I'll see you later.

As a matter of fact, we want
to talk to you about something.

Wait a minute.

I haven't come to a decision
yet, if that's what you want.

As a matter of fact, I've got
something that I have to say,

and I'm really sorry that up until
now, I've been b*ating around the bush

when all along I should
have come right out with it.

She talks a lot like her
mother, doesn't she?

Yeah.

Now, I don't want
your feelings to be hurt.

I want you to understand
that I like you both.

Laurie, we feel the same way.

The same way as what?

We don't want your
feelings to be hurt.

The fact is...

The crush is off.

You mean, I don't have
to decide between you?

Nope.

I hope you're not too
hurt, but we feel it's best.

You know, I'm disappointed,
sure, but I'll get over it.

I understand love
wounds heal fast.

It wasn't you. It was the
talk we had with your mother.

At first, we didn't understand,

but afterwards,
we thought it over.

And we decided that
we shouldn't let a girl,

even a girl as great as you,
come between us like that.

I understand.

Still friends?

Sure. Of course,
we're still friends.

But...

Do you mind if I reserve the right
to have a crush on you someday?

♪ One day, I was walking home

♪ I was thinking of
her ♪ Sure felt lost

♪ But she told me some
things of which I wasn't aware

♪ She told me she
would be kind of shy

♪ Until I opened up her life

♪ Now that she feels
the way that I want her to

♪ Say it again Say
you love me again

♪ Baby, say it again

♪ I've heard it before
But I'll hear it some more

♪ So, I'm waiting
for when you'll say

♪ Say it again Say
you love me again

♪ Baby, say it again

♪ So if I'm away
Don't forget what I say

♪ Baby, say it again
and again and again

♪ The first dates weren't how I
imagined how loving should be

♪ I told her just to wait to see if
her love brought her closer to me

♪ And when I got to look around

♪ I realized what I found

♪ Now that she says
the things that I want her to

♪ Say it again Say
you love me again

♪ Baby, say it again

♪ I've heard it before
But I'll hear it some more

♪ So I'm waiting
for when you'll say

♪ Say it again Say
you love me again

♪ Baby, say it again

♪ So if I'm away
Don't forget what I say

♪ Baby, say it again
and again and again

♪ Say it again Say
you love me again

♪ Baby, say it again

♪ I've heard it before
But I'll hear it some more

♪ So I'm waiting
for when you'll say

♪ Say it again Say
you love me again

♪ Baby, say it again

♪ So if I'm away
Don't forget what I say

♪ Baby, say it again
and again and again ♪

Their concert last night
was terrific, wasn't it?

It sure was. The boys really
enjoy performing together.

What exactly did you say to them
to make them change their minds?

A little motherly wisdom,
a little simple logic,

and a lot of b*ating
around the bush.

That's what I tried. How
come it worked for you?

Just call it motherly luck.

Boys?

Hi, Mr. Kincaid. Hi, Reuben.

How did the record
company like the boys' song?

They loved it. I bet we
got a hit on our hands.

Hot dog!

You know, Shirley,
I was thinking...

In Mr. Kincaid's case,
that could be dangerous.

Now that I have two successful acts,
maybe I should consider expanding.

You have another act in mind?

Well, yeah. I got
a postcard today.

The Flying Zucchinis are gonna be
appearing in San Pueblo next week.

I was thinking...
Forget it, Reuben.

But I understand they
got a great new trick.

Something to do with a guy
being sh*t out of a cannon.

Very you.

Yeah.

And I think Danny is
just the right caliber.