Yeah?
Vince, it's Veronica. I'm at the Playboy.
Oh, I'm trashed, Veronica.
Can I get back to you?
Listen, I think that guy
you were asking about...
the bail jumper, he's over here.
- Louie Sparks?
- Yeah, that's him.
He's been drinking speedballs all night.
He's getting pretty mean.
Keep him happy. I'll be right over.
Hey, don't forget
the $100 you promised me.
Yeah. Ciao.
$100. Jesus.
I'm lucky if I have enough for cab fare.
My rent check's
bounced twice this month.
The IRS
is digging info my pockets again...
and my Galaxie 500
was just repossessed.
Well, I guess that's how it goes
in my business.
At least that's what I've found out
after two years...
of working the pavement
and getting nowhere.
I guess you might call me
a bounty hunter...
but I really don't like that name.
I prefer to think of myself
as a recovery specialist...
people and property.
You name it, I'll get it back for you,
as long as I get a decent commission.
The Playboy. Hit it.
I've been tracking Louie Sparks
for two exhausting months.
He was caught kidnapping
well-bred babies...
and selling them
to impatient yuppie couples...
who can't manufacture their own.
He skipped bail
right before going to trial in Saturn City.
The bond company is offering me
$56,000 if I bring him in.
Louie's got a bad reputation
for losing his temper.
There he is.
Louie Sparks.
- Do I know you, Mr...
- Holloway.
Vince Holloway.
You're worth a lot of money back home.
Just think of me
as your personal escort back.
- You got the wrong guy, mister.
- Get up. We got a plane to catch.
I'm scared of flying.
Guys like you really get on my nerves.
You just can't learn
to mind your own business, can you?
Well, this is the last time, snoop.
You got a light?
Say hello to hell, mister.
I can't swim!
Vince, that was very impressive.
It's been a long time
since I've seen you, Vince.
Not long enough.
Oh, you hurt my feelings.
But, you know, I always remember you
looking so sharp, Vince.
Now, you look like shit.
Give me a break, for Christ's sake.
I won't give you shit.
On your feet, slime suck.
You're gonna see the boss
at headquarters.
As Louie Sparks sank,
I felt that $5,000 slip...
just like my luck.
The last person in the world
I wanted to see...
was Detective Carl Strick...
career agent
for the Internal Revenue Service.
Ever since we ran into each other
tracking down a bail jumper...
who owed the IRS a bundle,
he's hated me.
Strick wound up going down
a flight of stairs the fast way...
headfirst.
It wasn't my fault,
but since then, he's tried to crucify me
instigating two deep probing audits...
and hounding me on every case.
This time he was out to settle the score.
That's enough, Carl!
You're a mess, Vince.
So, what else is new?
What do you want from me, Vera?
We got a problem, Vince.
You've been in business
less than two years.
What do you call yourself...
a "recovery specialist"?
The only trouble is most of your
recoveries seem to wind up dead.
By my estimate, it's over five now.
Five's an awfully big number, Vince.
And every one of them is self-defense.
You've seen the reports.
Yeah, so has the DA and he wants
an end to it. You understand?
I warned you about this
the last time, Vince.
You realize that with your record...
I could set up this little incident
to give you a minimum of five-to-eight...
and that's with parole?
Name your price.
I can always write you a bad check.
Doesn't work with me, buster.
I love my job.
- You want something.
- Right.
What is it?
I think he's ready
to play ball with us, Carl. Go ahead.
Why don't you fill him in?
We got a su1c1de mission
out in the boondocks, Vince.
It's a real shit job.
Naturally, I suggested you.
Thanks.
Got a little show here
might cheer you up.
Great. So, pass the popcorn.
This is an aerial
reconnaissance photograph.
Diablo, a south-of-the-border
tax haven for criminals.
Legally, we can't touch them.
Nobody can.
They've gone completely outlaw.
And this is what's causing
all the commotion. The Bank of Diablo.
Its rules
and methods of operation are...
How can I put it? Totally unique.
I think you'll
find this concept intriguing, Vince.
You see, this bank
charges its depositors interest...
for keeping their money there,
because all the money is illegal cash.
Cash made in the worst possible way.
By smugglers, by hit men,
by scam artists, by the dreck!
This is Cora. She owns the bank.
She cleans all this dirty money...
then sends it out back into the world
smelling fresh as a daisy.
My sources tell me,
last year alone it was over $200 million.
Tax f*cking free.
Well, that sounds like
a good business to get into.
Well, it isn't, Holloway!
Go ahead, Carl.
Now, that's Reno.
Reno's the leader of one of the toughest
smuggling rings in all of Diablo.
Reno and Cora have teamed up
to provide the town with protection...
except lately, Reno's becoming
more and more powerful on his own.
Now, Cora has her own set
of bodyguards to protect the bank...
but they're defecting daily.
She's tried to appease him
by giving him half interest in the bank...
but it's not enough.
He's on the verge of taking over
the whole operation by himself.
Yeah, but Cora's gonna move the cash
out of Diablo...
before that can ever happen.
Our estimates predict that it's over
$20 million in international currency.
The pickup's gonna happen in five days.
That's where you come in, slime suck.
You're going to intercept
that bank transfer...
get it out of Diablo
and we make the pick up.
The government wants in
on this underground economy.
We want it bad.
Well, that's a big order, Carl.
- What's my incentive?
- We drop all charges.
Well, that's good
but it's not worth dying for.
- I think I'll pass on this one.
- I think you won't.
If you can stay alive
long enough to collect it...
we've got a 5.5% recovery fee
waiting for you.
- Now that's over...
- $1 million.
- Thanks.
- When do I start?
You just did.
Transport moves out in 10 minutes.
I'm on it. Window seat. Smoking.
On my jobs, I try to get the client...
to provide me
with an expense account...
and first-class transportation.
It's one of those perks
I like to think I deserve.
This time I got $200
and three days on a banana boat.
Kind of a no-frills arrangement.
What seems to be
the problem, Captain?
This is as close as I get
to Diablo, mister.
If you were smart, you'd do the same.
- That place is a sewer.
- Well, how much further is it?
- Good day's walk.
- A good day's walk?
Oh, no. I hate to walk.
Now, get going-
Solo.
Come, sit. Come, sit.
I don't get much time
to relax at this job, mister.
And you just f*cked up my schedule.
You know what that means in my book?
You owe me.
Now, get going-
Oh, leave those city-boy shoes behind,
eh, Solo?
Yeah.
That ought to make us even.
God damn it.
Dude, welcome
to our factory showroom.
Come on down.
Everything's gotta go,
"cause I got to make some dough.
And you really do get the best for less.
Basic economy model.
If you want this in black,
real cool these days, that's extra.
- I just need some water. Could you...
- We also have aquatic blue...
- psychedelic pink, orange and yellow.
- You got any water?
Yeah, I got water. You got money?
Fact is, mister, the only thing
worth nothing around here is your life.
Everything else is gonna cost big.
I got a pair of shoes
that are gonna look real natty on you.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
- How much?
- Cheap, dude. Check them out.
Sharp, huh?
These beauts still have
a lot of miles left on them.
Yeah, they're sharp all right.
But I don't like the idea
of wearing a dead man's shoes.
Why not?
I'll throw in a free ride to the town.
One thing's for sure...
this isn't Vegas.
This is a restricted area.
Only customers with
a current savings account...
or new customers
making a cash deposit...
will be admitted to the premises.
This is a restricted area.
Come on, Dakota, don't be so mad.
I'll behave myself.
A little higher, Dakota!
Don't even think about her, dude.
That's Dakota.
She used to be Reno's lady.
Didn't you see those bodies hanging
on the outskirts of town?
They were her lovers
until Reno got a hold of them.
He swore if he couldn't have her,
nobody else would.
Times change.
Yeah. Maybe ['ll start building
you a coffin this afternoon, dude.
You'll need it.
- Later, dude.
- Yeah, later.
Cut the crap. We're booked.
If you're looking for trouble...
There's a room with a balcony
overlooking the street.
I'm listening.
It's got sentimental value for me.
You don't strike me
as the sentimental type.
Then I guess you got me figured wrong.
I guess that couple up there
did say something about...
checking out today.
I thought so.
I paid for the room.
You don't like it, talk to the manager.
- Now, get going.
- Take it easy, man.
- Get the f*ck out.
- Be careful with my stuff!
Boy, this was a bargain.
You gonna be here long?
Not if I can help it.
Here on business?
Well...
you could say that.
Me, too.
Really? I would have never guessed.
- You work for Dakota, don't you?
- No.
Well, this is her joint, isn't it?
Reno got it for her.
After that, they split up.
Why?
- Why don't you ask her yourself?
- Well, maybe I will.
Are we going to get down
to some real business or not?
No. Beat it.
Come on, you cheap shit.
Yeah? Thanks for the massage.
assh*le.
One look at that bank
and I knew it wasn't gonna be easy.
What I needed was friends, lots of them.
And one thing was for certain...
this was a friendly town.
Por favor.
The Mayor would like to draw
your attention to the fact...
Well, I'm more than willing to learn.
How these girls get money to burn.
Every proposition I turn down.
Dakota, I love you!
It's not 'cause I shouldn't.
Or 'cause I wouldn't.
And you know it's not 'cause I couldn't.
It's simply because
I'm the laziest girl in town.
Nothing ever worries me.
Nothing ever hurries me
I take pleasure leisurely.
Even when I kiss.
But when I kiss, they want some more.
And wanting more becomes a bore.
What'll it be?
Johnny Walker Black, straight up.
I tell them this.
It's not 'cause I shouldn't.
Or because I wouldn't.
And you know it's not 'cause I couldn't.
It's simply because
I'm the laziest girl in town.
It's simply because
I'm the laziest girl in town.
Jesus Christ,
what are you trying to do, k*ll me?
Johnny and I are very close...
and this isn't him.
I just serve the stuff, mister.
I don't brew it.
Yeah, well, make good or give. My
money doesn't grow on trees. All right?
Is there a problem here, Zoe?
Well, he seems to think so.
- I'm sorry about the mistake, Mr...
- Holloway.
Vince Holloway.
My compliments, Mr. Holloway.
- Sorry about the mix-up.
- Well...
I'm sorry you have to be sorry.
Keep playing! I want to get down!
You sweet little slut, you.
Hi, Dakota.
You're looking awfully attractive tonight,
you little sexpot, you.
Wish I could say
the same for you, Floyd.
Zoe, I'm thirsty.
What, did Reno
finally let you out of your cage?
You know, sometimes I envy Reno.
He was the only man that could
keep a woman like you in line.
And if it wasn't for him,
you'd be mine, too. You know it.
Yeah, right.
You know, Dakota,
you're like the flower...
and I'm like the bee.
And I find your odor intoxicating.
You, pal...
you stink.
You know what you smell like most?
A thief.
You stole those shoes
from my friend Earl.
You robbed his grave, didn't you?
Didn't you?
I don't think you know
who you're dealing with here, assh*le.
You're right. I'm sorry.
I shouldn't have stole
your friend's shoes.
I feel horrible about it.
The man won fair and square.
Now back off.
And get the hell out of my bar.
Move!
Thanks.
Zoe.
So what's your story, mister?
I've never seen you around here before.
I'm just trying to pay the rent
like everybody else.
Well, if you're looking for work...
I could certainly use a man around here
with your kind of skills.
I get a feeling you and I
would get along just fine.
Well, I don't think Reno
would like that very much.
Oh, Reno doesn't tell me what to do.
Well, you're his girl, aren't you?
- I see whoever I want.
- Oh, I see.
And then Reno fits him for a nice pair
of cement shoes, is that it?
I should have let Floyd's men finish you.
No, you did the right thing.
I'll be seeing you.
Forget about the bank, dude.
A lot of dudes
try to break into the vault...
and they all have died.
Anybody ever tell you,
you have a negative attitude, kid?
I'm just trying to stop you
from wasting your time and your life.
Next time you want to help me
don't stall by selling me shoes...
that belong to one of Floyd's friends.
I almost got k*lled because of you.
- Hey, I didn't know that.
- Like hell you didn't.
You're gonna need some help
if you wanna break into that bank.
Yeah?
I can get you expl*sives,
wheels, lots of things.
- We should make a deal.
- What kind of a deal?
- All I want is 30%.
- Come on, kid.
- Fifteen?
- Come on, stop wasting my time.
Ten. Nobody else
can get you better stuff...
and I can keep my mouth shut.
That's worth a lot.
All right, kid.
You got yourself a deal,
but I'm telling you right now...
- you screw me over again...
- You'll see, dude. I won't let you down.
Later, dude.
You know what I said to myself...
the first time I saw you
checking out that bank?
I said, "That man is trouble."
I like trouble.
You do, huh?
Well, I don't.
Now, why don't you get out of here,
so I can get some sleep?
You know, I don't think Reno's
gonna be too thrilled...
when he finds out
someone's trying to rip off his vault.
Well, I don't plan on telling him, do you?
I might.
That is unless, of course...
we can come up with
some kind of financial agreement.
I mean, don't get me wrong here, friend.
I'm not looking for a free ride.
I can offer you a lot of help.
Maybe I don't want any help.
You know, nobody knows this town
like I do.
And I've had my eye on that vault
for a very long time.
I know what's going on around here.
I know Cora's trying
to get that money out.
- So what?
- So, let's cut the bullshit, okay.
The fact is, once this bank
goes out of business...
this town is gonna fall off
the face of the map.
And that means my hotel
is gonna be worth a shit.
Now I've put too much g*dd*mn work...
into this dump to come out with nothing.
Now you either join up with me
and split that cash 50-50...
or I'm gonna blow the whistle
on the whole thing.
And that's it. End of discussion.
Well, it doesn't look like
I have much of a choice, does it?
Absolutely none.
Okay, you got a deal.
But I'm telling you right now
you're gonna earn that 50%.
That's good.
That's real good.
But you don't collect
until after I get that money.
Remember that.
Sweet dreams, lover boy.
I liked her.
She was really nice.
Shit!
What good is that gonna do?
I don't know, Vera.
I told you to rent the Suzuki Samurai.
Don't give me grief, Vera.
It wasn't my idea to come down here
in the first place.
I could be asleep
in my massage bed right now.
What is the matter with you, Strick?
What, do you trust Vince
to bring the money back on his own?
No, I don't.
But if we get caught down here,
we're gonna be in deep shit.
We've got no authority to be doing this
and you know it.
When we show up with that money...
nobody is going to care
that we broke one little paper law.
This is gonna be the biggest bust
in department history.
I might even get a promotion out of this.
Well, what about me? Do I get one, too?
- Yeah, I guess you do.
- Well, I'd better.
Well, we'll talk about it later, okay?
Okay-
Let's get going. Push!
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, run!
Take him down.
He's all yours, boss.
Reno, I can explain, man.
You rip me off, you pay the price.
Party's over, boys.
This is none of your business, Cora.
I told you before,
I don't want this out here...
not in front of my bank.
Your bank? You mean our bank.
I don't want another bloodbath
in front of this place.
It's bad for business.
What's the matter?
You wanted security.
Isn't that what you hired me for?
Yeah, yeah.
Well, we all make mistakes.
Yeah, and we all live with our mistakes.
Get out of here, Reno.
Make me.
These aren't the Boy Scouts, pal.
Next time.
Let's go.
Say hello to the birdie, Roy.
Talk about a freak show.
This party was definitely
headed for the deep end.
If there was ever a day
for me to make my move...
this was it.
Excuse me, sir.
Are you looking for someone?
- Do you have an appointment?
- It's a restricted area.
Hey, what's going on?
Intruder on the premises!
Intruder on the premises!
Well, who the hell do you think
you are, pal?
I got a problem, lady, and you're
the only one that can help me.
I was told this was a safe, secure,
no-questions-asked place...
to leave a big cash deposit.
But, after this morning's show,
I'm starting to have some doubts.
I don't exactly like traveling
with almost $1 million in cash...
of my boss' money.
You know what I mean?
I traveled 2,000 miles
to get to this dumper.
Either this place lives up
to its reputation for security...
or it doesn't.
If you want my business...
I'm gonna need some assurances
that my money is safe.
Real safe.
It's all right, boys.
I'll take care of Mr...
Holloway. Vince Holloway.
I've never been one
to turn away business, Mr. Holloway...
no matter how
unorthodox my customers are.
- Money is money.
- My sentiment exactly.
Nothing fancy here.
Just sheer brute strength.
These walls are three feet thick.
Reinforced concrete.
Six separate locks.
Unless each lock is opened
in perfect sequence...
the defense mechanism
is automatically triggered.
I change the sequence for every lock,
every week.
I'm the only one who knows it.
Nobody gets to your money without me.
Nobody.
What if something happens to you?
It won't. You can bank on that.
Here are your deposit slips.
You have my personal guarantee
for protection.
If anything happens to your money,
I pay you back myself.
My reputation speaks for itself.
You can ask around.
I will.
I hope I see you again.
Don't worry. You will.
Ciao.
It's a cruel
and unusual world.
Don't ask for much.
Don't ask for much.
It's a cruel.
Found a new sport that I like.
Know what it is?
Golf.
You know why I like it?
"Cause golf is walking through a park
with a purpose.
Don't ask for much.
Don't ask for much.
Don't ask for much.
Don't ask for much.
All right, guys, take a break.
I hope you can act
as well as you can sing.
I do all right. Why?
I got a little job for you.
I want you to throw a party
and invite Reno and his boys.
What are you crazy?
I haven't been near Reno in months.
I want you to heat him up so bad...
that he can't think straight.
Like that?
No.
Like this.
Well.
That's really nice
but how are we gonna get our money?
Is that all you can think about?
- What else is there?
- Us.
No, that's a closed subject
until after I get paid.
You think Mona can get Floyd
into the alley at exactly 11:00 tonight?
I'll make sure of it.
And then what happens? You gonna
take on the whole g*ng yourself?
Well, maybe I won't do anything.
Maybe I just sit back...
and watch Reno and his boys
tear this place to the ground.
But then again, maybe I will.
- You think you're real smart, don't you?
- Yeah, I do.
- 11:00.
- Sure.
This baby used to belong
to the fastest gunrunner in Diablo.
He was known as the Road Runner.
He bought the farm in her
just a few weeks ago.
She was barely scratched.
He went right through the windshield
and hit a wire.
Took his head clean off.
Never did find that head.
Wound up burying him without it.
- What's that for?
- It's a custom do.
Turns this baby into a four-wheel drive.
That's why nobody
could ever catch him.
- What else you got for me?
- Check it out.
I call this the combo pack.
These two popguns
will stop an elephant at 100 yards.
- Nice. Very nice.
- Yeah.
- Everything else set?
- All systems go.
Told you I wouldn't let you down, dude.
What the hell's going on?
I wanna rock! What are you doing?
Give me some more funk. Now!
Now we're gonna
hear some high notes...
and some low notes
from that high priestess of song...
Dakota.
There's somethin'
about his kiss.
That sets my heart aglow.
And when he holds me.
Gosh, I know.
I'm the luckiest girl.
In this whole wide world.
Gee, what a guy.
And when he talks to me
soft and sweet.
Oh, when he holds my hand.
And we walk down the street.
I'm the luckiest girl.
In this whole wide world.
Gee, what a guy.
I knew from the moment
I met him.
He was the guy for me.
His tender smile.
His warm caress.
Opened my eyes to see.
Gee, what a guy I've got.
I love him so.
The things he does for me
makes me know.
I'm the luckiest girl.
In the whole wide world.
Gee, what a guy.
I said my, oh, my, oh, my.
Gee, what a guy.
Come on, Floyd, let's go.
I said my, oh, my, oh, my.
Gee, what a guy.
Come on! Come on!
Come on!
Oh, I really like you, Floyd.
Hey, what's going on?
I really like you, too, Mona.
Round and round the mulberry bush.
The monkey chased the weasel.
POP
Goes the weasel.
I miss you, baby.
I can't be without you anymore.
It hurts my brain.
I missed you, too.
I got a surprise for you.
You like it?
It's nice.
Not now, baby. Later.
There's a guy at the bar
who's waiting for you.
- Where you going?
- I gotta go take care of some business.
Hurry back.
- You all right, baby?
- I'm fine. I'm okay.
Put on a happy face, Floyd.
No, wait! It's me!
It's Floyd.
This is what we found on him.
Looks like Floyd's on Cora's payroll.
She's really out to get you
this time, baby.
That f*cking bitch.
I want her ass now! Let's go!
Let's get her!
Are you sure
you know what you're doing?
After tonight, baby,
we'll have everything.
You wait here for me.
I'll wait. I'll wait.
Let's lock it up and go home, girls.
The Blue Iguana is closed for business.
Oh, shut up, Sparky.
This is tuna.
You know I don't like tuna anymore.
Would you bring me something
I can eat, you moron?
Oh, and, by the way, you're fired.
Don't stop on my account.
The show was just starting
to get interesting.
You shouldn't play with g*ns.
You don't scare me.
I'm impressed,
but you got the wrong guy.
Reno's the one out to k*ll you, not me.
Yeah? Well, that's not news, pal.
Now get the hell off of me.
Any minute Reno's gonna show up here
with his entire g*ng.
Only one thing on their minds.
Stringing you up.
So you better listen and listen good.
I know about your little plan
to shortchange them...
- and get out while the going's still good.
- No. You're bluffing.
Reno also knows.
He's on his way over here right now
with big plans of his own...
for making you hand over
the combination to that vault.
Yeah? Well, he'll never get it out of me.
Well, somehow, I don't think
you'll hold up too good under t*rture.
- Oh, yeah?
- Even though I bet you can dish it out.
Yeah. I can take care of myself.
Well, I got a better idea.
I take care of you.
What the hell are you talking about?
I got it figured out
so we can outsmart Reno...
and get that money out of its vault
in time for a rendezvous.
What do you mean "we"? You're
a Good Samaritan all of a sudden?
No. A good businessman.
The right service at the right time
is worth a lot of money...
and I don't think 20%
is too much to ask...
for saving your ass
and your entire operation.
That's absurd! I got 15 men outside.
I don't need you.
And every one of them is gonna be dead
after Reno's attack.
That is if they don't sell you out first.
Go get her!
So, what's it gonna be?
You wanna hang around here...
and become hostess
to Reno's little party?
Or you wanna give up 20%...
and live to wear some of those
new shoes before they go out of style?
Let's go.
Come on!
- I hope you can drive.
- Don't worry. I'm from New York.
Sorry about that.
Check the roof.
Shit.
Reno, she's not here.
I'm gonna k*ll her.
I thought I'd be here all night, man.
Oh, my God!
What happened to your hand?
What do you mean,
what happened to my hand?
There's nothing wrong...
Hey, what the hell are you doing?
I'm going to town.
You're staying here.
- Hey, you can't do this to me.
- He just did.
Yeah? Well, you don't know
what I'm like when I get mad.
I'll k*ll you if you double-cross me!
I swear I will!
I'll get you for this, shorty!
I promise you
you'll never work in this town again!
I'll see you crippled!
Let's go!
Coming to get it, Cora!
We better talk, Reno,
before it's too late.
Who the hell are you?
Just think of me
as your financial advisor.
Right now, that entire Vault's wired
to self-destruct.
Anyone tampers with that combination,
everything inside goes "poof."
$20 million burned to a crisp.
Take him.
k*ll me. There isn't a chance in hell
you'll ever get that money.
Cora's the only person
that can open that safe...
and I've got Cora.
Get off him.
Get off him!
Where is she?
Right now, she's wired up
and set for blastoff in 20 minutes.
If I'm not back in time,
she goes with me.
Bullshit.
You want to risk it?
You'll be broke in a week.
How long you think this operation
is gonna last without a cash flow?
With Cora gone and no money,
you're nothing.
What makes you think
she's gonna open the safe for you?
That's my problem.
All I need is you and all your men
cleared out of town by noon.
Sometime in there,
I'll come in with Cora, collect my 30%...
leave her
and the rest of the cash for you.
And how do I know you won't take off?
You've got my word.
I'll give you another reason.
You got 15 minutes left.
Like it or not,
I'm the only chance you got.
You have until noon.
You f*ck me...
and you're dead.
I'll try to keep that in mind.
Jesus Christ! Where the hell were you?
I thought you were gonna back me up.
I was. I was just waiting
until you needed me.
- Yeah, sure you were.
- Yeah.
Yeah. Next time somebody puts a g*n
to my head...
I want you right there.
None of this funny business...
- Next time. Next time.
- Isn't this cute?
The little lost orphan and his brother.
- So when do I get my cut of the money?
- Tomorrow, after we blow the vault.
Split the money at my partner's place.
And how do I know
you won't split town on me?
Well, I still have to collect
on my end of the bargain, don't I?
In the meantime,
I want you to keep Reno happy...
till high noon tomorrow.
That should give me enough time.
What if Reno doesn't feel
like sleeping late?
You'll think of something.
Sweet dreams, lover.
Vera.
I don't wanna hear about that.
Well?
Yeah, I can fix it.
This team is moving out!
In two days.
- What?
- Two days?
We gotta be in Diablo tonight.
Sorry. German parts are difficult to get.
Great, just great.
What about that?
If that runs, we'll buy it off of you.
It's not mine.
Well, call up whoever owns it.
You got a phone.
- It's Bonzo's.
- What?
It was Bonzo's birthday present.
Who the hell is Bonzo?
He says he won't sell it to you.
- I don't believe this.
- He's got to be kidding.
Carl, get the keys.
We are going down there...
and no crazy f*ck
is gonna stand in my way.
All right, listen up, Rubberhead.
You give me the keys
like the boss says...
or you're gonna be collecting Medicaid.
Give me the keys.
Come on, give me the keys.
Take it easy, dude.
You're talking serious destruction here.
Now, you know where
to meet me afterwards, right?
We've only been over this 50 times.
Yeah.
I'm counting on you.
Now what are we gonna do?
That vault door opens from the inside,
doesn't it?
Yeah, there's a safety on it.
But what good is that gonna do us?
Can't you try
and be a little nice for once?
Hey, you wouldn't feel so good either...
if you'd been chained
to a Cadillac all night, pal.
Well, I thought maybe you liked
that kind of thing.
Let's just get this over with.
It's too quiet around here.
That means something's wrong,
doesn't it?
Now, promise to behave yourself,
and you can have this back...
if it makes you feel any better.
- I'll be a good girl.
- Yeah, sure you will.
What are we gonna do
if these guys show up?
Let me worry about that.
That's it.
Love at first sight.
Hey, nice plan, smarty-pants.
Now what are we supposed to do?
I hope you know
what the hell you're doing.
Boss.
It's the bank! It's the bank!
The bank exploded, man!
Reno, what are you gonna do?
Don't worry, baby. I'll take care of it.
Well, there goes the neighborhood.
What gives, man?
What gives is,
I gotta take care of some business...
and I don't want you two following me.
- Why?
- I can think of a lot of reasons.
That's only because I'm smart.
Now, let's go.
Come on. Hurry up.
Well, that's all of it.
Oh, no.
You're not gonna k*ll me, are you?
That's very good, Vince.
But I don't share my money
with anybody.
Not unless I have to.
You have to.
Shit.
Well, it looks like my percentage
has just gone way up. So long.
Now, now, wait a minute.
Vince, hey, I didn't mean that.
Come on,
I knew that g*n wasn't loaded.
I was just kidding you, pal.
Come on, give me a...
You son of a bitch!
You didn't think
I'd trust a reptile like Cora...
with a loaded g*n, did you?
Not a chance.
Broke one day, the next
I'm throwing money out the window.
Next Monday, a giant bake-off
will be held at the town center...
to help raise money for a new library!
A host of luscious hometown treats...
such as guanabana, papaya...
Okay, let's go, pal. Take a lunch break.
Come on, out of the car.
Hasta la vista. Let's go.
Don't worry, I got insurance.
Go on, get out of here. Get a job.
Come on, baby.
Hey, dude. Come on, let's go.
It's funny, but I couldn't help feeling
a little bit sorry for Reno.
And why not?
He was headed where I'd just been...
rock bottom.
Shit, dude, this was almost too easy.
I think it's time
we divided that money three ways...
for me, myself, and I.
Open it up.
Come on.
Now, don't play games with me.
Shit.
Shit.
- Somebody switched them.
- It's empty.
It really is empty.
Does anybody else know about this?
Dakota.
Don't tell me you made a deal with her,
bright boys.
What's so funny, Cora?
She and Reno
are probably long gone right now.
Dude, she stole my truck, too!
- Hey, what's so great about that, dude?
- It was on reserve, dude.
Could you come here
for a second, please?
Hey, where do you think
you're taking me?
- Please, come here for one minute.
- What do you want?
Look, I gotta get this coffin
to the cemetery on time...
or my boss is gonna k*ll me.
Will you help me out?
No way. I'm not gonna do it. Forget it.
- I'll make it worth your while.
- Take it, man. Take it.
Dakota!
I used to have so many friends
I never had to see anyone twice.
Shut up!
- Where is she?
- She's gone, man. Split city.
Hey, come back here and untie us,
you d*ck.
We've gone three miles.
She can't be much further.
There she is.
All right, pull over, wise guy.
- Oh, shit. It's empty.
- What?
It's still warm. She's close, real close.
All right, move it, buddy.
Shut that thing off.
- Shit. Come on, guys. Go. Quick. Go!
- Hey, what's going on?
Go. Just hurry up.
- What do we do with this thing?
- Put it down there!
Dakota!
Hey, man, let's get out of here.
- Yeah, that was stupid.
- Maybe you're stupid...
Yeah, check it out, man. There they are.
Don't run away from me!
Don't run away from me!
Get off me, Reno!
Move, assh*le!
Hold it.
All right, let's go. Over there. Come on.
Move it. Move it!
This is where we part company, fellows.
All right, I want you on your knees,
right here and here. Let's go.
Bend over, big boy.
Now, k*lling us isn't a good idea, Cora.
We can help you.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'm only 15 years old.
Where's your maternal instinct?
Right here, pal.
That's real cute.
What the hell do you want?
Where's my money?
There is no money.
It was all burned to shit.
Like hell it was.
Your girlfriend stole it, bozo.
What are you talking about?
Don't listen to her, baby.
She's crazy. She's just jealous.
Tell her where the money is, baby.
Tell her where the money is.
Oh, brother.
Come on, Reno.
Stop stalling me and fork it over.
I'm gonna give you to five.
One, two, three...
Watch it, watch it, watch it.
There she is. Let's get our cash.
Get away from that money.
Keep down.
Get down.
Shit.
Let's go.
Hey, right here, man. That's gotta be it.
- Yeah, yeah!
- Get your hands off my money.
Shit.
I said get away from my money.
Your money? I thought we had a deal.
Forget it.
Love kills, dude.
Do you realize, 50 years,
you don't ever have to work?
Oh, I can feel that massage unit now.
Massage unit?
I'm gonna get one
of those special massage units.
You know, the deluxe ones.
Oh, man, what is this?
Clear out, will you?
Don't you know we got places to go?
Yeah, and money to spend.
Come on, man. Clear out.
Get out of the car, boys.
I said get out of the car! Party's over!
That's funny, Vince.
The border's to the north,
and you guys are going to the south.
South? I thought we were going north.
All right, get away from that vehicle.
I said move!
You understand English, boy? Move!
- We almost missed you, Vince.
- Yeah.
But almost doesn't count,
does it, Vince?
Get the keys, Carl.
Now wait a minute.
What about my percentage?
Percentage? What percentage?
I don't remember anything
about a percentage. Do you, Carl?
Percentage?
Hey, well, what about my share?
Yeah, get it from your buddy, punk.
- Give me that key, you slime bucket.
- Hey, man. Chill out, man!
- Keys, keys, keys, keys, keys.
- Freeze, twerp.
Keys, keys, keys.
- They're in the car, you moron!
- Oh.
Don't be so depressed, Vince.
At least you're not going to jail.
Look at it this way, Vince.
You can go home now.
If we hadn't caught you,
somebody else would.
There's 85,000 more IRS agents.
This way, you can have a nice
little tract home, a white picket fence.
Yeah, you get to pay taxes, too.
Let's go, Carl.
Well, can't you even give us a ride?
Use our car, sucker.
Shit!
You're the slime sucker.
No matter what you try or do...
you just can't beat the tax man.
f*ck you and your friend.
At least not 85,000 of them.
- God damn it!
- Shit.
By the time I get back to the city,
my whole life is gonna be repossessed.
I'm better off just sitting here...
and letting this donkey stomp on me
"cause I'm flat-broke busted.
- Hey, well, what about me?
- What about you?
I still got a lot of stuff I can do.
- Like what?
- I'm just going through puberty.
- You won't miss much there.
- Yeah, but see, I got big plans.
Such as?
Blue Iguana.
You know, I figure since
everybody's dead, man, we own it.
- Yeah?
- Yeah, and with a little advertising...
Diablo could become
the next big tourist hot spot.
What could be more ideal?
Babes, good times, partying.
- No, that pad of my life's over.
- Cash.
- Yeah?
- That place makes a lot of money, man.
You think so?
Well, maybe that's not such a bad idea.
But the first thing we gotta do, though,
is change the name of that joint.
How about Vince's Voodoo Lounge?
I think it'll draw them in.
You're kidding.
We'll call it Yano's Hut.
Yano? What's a Yano?
- That's my name, man.
- Oh, sorry. No, forget about that.
Forget about it? I own half of that place.
The deal was you get 10%, remember?
No way.
I'm not sticking to that suck-ass deal.
Now look, Zano, a deal's a deal.
And you better learn to stick with it
no matter how sour it gets.
That's the golden rule in my business.
If there's one thing
you gotta learn from me, it's that.
So what?
Well, I'll tell you what.
You're a good kid. You're a nice kid.
I'll give you 30%. That's my final offer.
50-50. I'm not taking any less.
Boy, you are really greedy,
you know that?
Oh, all right, it's a deal.
Now, just chill out.
Even after settling on 50%...
Yano complained about the name
for days.
We couldn't agree,
so we left it as it was.
The Blue Iguana.
Funny thing is, Yano was right...
about Diablo
becoming the next big thing.
Six months later,
they built a Club Med right next door.
Blue Iguana, The (1988)
Moderator: Maskath3