10x03 - Dog Collar

[bunniefuu]

♪ Heartbeat

♪ Why do you miss

♪ When my baby kisses me?

♪ Heartbeat

♪ Why does a love kiss

♪ Stay in my memory? ♪

♪ I danced in the morning When the world was begun

♪ I danced in the moon And the stars and the sun

♪ I came down from heaven And I danced on the earth

♪ At Bethlehem I had my birth

♪ Dance, then, wherever you may be

♪ I am the Lord of the dance said He

♪ And I'll lead you all Wherever you may be

♪ And I'll lead you all In the dance, said He

♪ I danced for the scribe And the Pharisee

♪ But they wouldn't dance And they wouldn't follow me

♪ I danced for the fishermen For James and John

♪ They came with me And the dance went on... ♪

DOG BARKING

- Claude! - Ah! Now, Mrs Benton.

At long last!

They've made a smashing job of it.

- Ah, it's wonderful! - I thought you'd think so.

It'll be a lovely outside home for him

when he wants to be in the garden.

- Yes! You don't want a hand, David? - How much did we agree again?

Well, normally I charge quid, but for you, £.

£. Good.

Now then, I've got another little problem.

Certainly not chucking your money about.

What sort of a problem is it, Mrs Benton?

CRASHING

I did enjoy that, Sarge.

Enjoyed it? I wouldn't go that far, Alf.

Still, I suppose it's important that we councillors

show our faces at these events.

Sarge...

Ah, Vicar. We were just saying how much we've enjoyed the concert.

Good. I'm very glad.

Mary says we've raised £ towards the roof so far.

£. to be exact, Reverend Gibbs.

OSCAR: Oh, that's excellent news, Vicar.

- Dad, we better get going? - Yes.

Look, do you think you could shut up shop, Mary?

Of course.

THOMAS: Ruth isn't well. That's why she had to leave early.

She has a migraine.

You get off, Reverend Gibbs. Alf and I can shut up shop.

can't we. - Oh, of course.

Well done, Alf.

The Ashfordly dog show's the day after tomorrow,

and Harvey would have been a certain winner,

but I have to go and see my brother who's been taken ill.

I'm sorry to hear that. You'll have to miss it, then?

Yes. And the £ prize, too.

quid?

A bit unfortunate!

Worse than that. Harvey won his last two shows with flying colours.

A third victory, and he'd become a champion. In there, please.

So if he won it,

you'd be able to make a few bob out of him as a stud?

- As a what? - A stud, David.

As far as you're concerned, it's summat they put in a collar.

Listen, can't you get someone to enter him for you?

Yes, but who? It'd have to be somebody entirely responsible

with a genuine empathy with dogs, and Harvey, in particular.

Well, I think I know somebody who can answer that criteria

who's standing not a million miles away from you.

It's very good of you, Alf.

Oh, that's all right. Mrs Ventress told me you'd expect it.

I'm sorry she couldn't get to the concert herself.

So is she. She's devoted to this church, you know?

Only she doesn't get many opportunities

to visit her sister these days.

Quite. If you'll just put those in the vestry, then we'll go.

- Alf? - What's that?

The candlesticks.

They're gone.

What are you doing in here?

Getting a glass of water, Mrs Gibbs.

You've no business coming in the house.

Reverend Gibbs said it was all right.

Well, I certainly haven't.

- I'm sorry. - Go, on, just get out.

Simon?

- Ruth, what's wrong? - Simon was in the kitchen.

I told him they could come in.

I'm not sure you should have, Thomas.

Why not?

You know why not. Are you sure you can trust them?

Just because they're different, doesn't make them criminals.

No, you've heard the rumours as well as I have.

I refuse to be influenced by gossip and prejudice.

We above all have a duty to treat them decently.

Exactly.

Well, I think I've done my charitable duty for today.

Pity you couldn't wait till the end of the concert.

Yes, Mum. It was embarrassing for Dad.

I told you. I had a really bad headache. I'm sorry.

Not to worry. There'll be other times.

Oh, the joys of being a clergyman's wife!

- Reverend Gibbs? - That's right.

PC Mike Bradley, Aidensfield Police.

His coat must be shampooed and brushed the night before

and then again on the morning of the show.

And his ears must be absolutely spotless,

but you can use cotton buds for that.

And his teeth... Well, his teeth must be absolutely gleaming.

Here.

Are you sure you want to take this responsibility on?

Yes, Mrs Benton. People always think we're responsible.

Good.

As you know, I'm a woman of some means.

So when Harvey achieves championship status,

he'll be worth his weight in gold. - Gold.

So when he wins,

I'll keep the trophy and you can have the prize money.

What do you think about that?

Like music to my ears. Many thank yous in advance.

Have you any idea when the candlesticks could have been taken?

I think they were there last night, but I wouldn't swear to it.

It's really despicable behaviour.

I presume they were valuable.

Yes, but it's not the monetary value.

It's the fact they've been in that church for years.

Someone just walks in and takes them.

So you don't actually ever lock the church?

Of course not. A church should be there

as a place of refuge and prayer for everyone at any time.

For anyone to abuse that trust is quite appalling.

Yes. Yes, it is.

Well, we'll get on with our enquiries

and get back to you as soon as possible.

I hope you're making a good job of that.

Hey...

That's a nice bit of steak.

Where did you get that?

From the butcher's. That's best sirloin, that is.

- Cost five bob. - Five bob?

That's a bit extravagant!

Well, stick it on to the grill, I'm starving.

No, it's not for us.

- It's for Harvey. - Harvey who?

Harvey the dog. Mrs Benton's strict instructions.

The best steak only for him.

CLAUDE: And pigs might! He can share Alfred's tripe.

- You can't give Harvey tripe! - Why not?

Alfred's done very well on it. And let's face it,

Harvey's not going to tell his mummy, is he?

- She trusted us! - And rightly so.

Stick it under the grill.

If I enjoy it, I'll let you take Harvey for walkies.

Go on, I'll finish him.

Come here, son. Come here. Good boy.

Hi. SHE GASPS

- Hiya! What are you doing here? - Bit of a loose end.

- Thought I'd pop by. - Oh, good.

Oscar's out and I'm in need of some male assistance.

Look no further!

What's your problem? Need help behind the bar?

No. Something much more challenging than that.

Something that'll take expert skill.

- I'm your man. - Follow me, then.

There.

Simon, can I talk to you?

Of course.

KAREN: You don't mind me coming here?

SIMON: Course not.

- KAREN: You sure? - Yeah.

We're pretty well finished anyhow.

Look, I'm really sorry about how Mum was with you.

It's not your fault. I'm used to it.

I just don't know how long I can stand it.

Still, it won't be for much longer, will it?

No.

Simon, what's wrong?

- Nothing. - Tell me. There is something.

I suppose I'm worried about Dad, how he'd manage without me.

So you don't want us to go away together?

No, I'm not saying that. It isn't that simple.

I'm worried about leaving Dad.

If you don't want to leave him, just say.

I do. It's just, there's a lot to sort out.

- You know I want to be with you. - Yeah.

I love you, Karen.

How's it going?

PANTING Fine. Absolutely fine.

It's proving to be more complicated than I thought.

I'm going to have to dismantle the U-bend.

- Do you know how to do it? - Oh, yeah. No problem at all.

I just need some... some special tools.

And I'll have to come back tomorrow.

It's really good of you, Phil.

The pleasure's all mine.

What's that smell?

Me, I think.

Oh, it's horrible!

-Mr Oakes? - Yeah.

I was wondering if you could help me.

If I can.

Silver candlesticks, matching this description.

Have you had anyone come in and pawn them today?

No.

Well, if they do, keep in mind that

they were stolen from Eltering Church sometime yesterday.

- Stolen from a church? - Yeah.

- That's a shabby trick, ain't it? - It is. To put it mildly.

Well, I'm sorry I can't help you,

but if anyone comes in with anything like this I'll get in touch.

Great. Well, thanks very much for your help.

What are you doing?

I thought I'd pop into York and do some shopping.

Is something wrong?

No, it's the bring-and-buy over at St Barnabas.

I told them you'd go over and help set it up this afternoon.

Oh, well, if I'm back in time, I'll nip over.

- But they're expecting you. - Thomas, I said I'd try.

But I need your support.

We are supposed to be a partnership.

I've got my work cut out as it is,

writing sermons, running two churches,

ministering to the needs of countless parishioners.

I know, Thomas. But nobody forced you to be a vicar, did they?.

And nobody forced you to marry me, did they?

I married you because I loved you.

I just need to get away sometimes.

- You do understand, don't you? - I know it's not easy.

You know I want you to be happy.

So you really don't mind if I go to York?

Can't she get someone else to fix it for her?

No. Well, yes, she could, but...

- But you'll do. - Yeah.

Phil, you don't know the first thing about plumbing.

Oh, come on, you've got to be joking.

Mike, I...

Bradley. How did your enquiries go?

Nothing so far, Sarge.

I've checked with some of the local dealers,

but none of them have been offered any candlesticks.

That's not to say it won't happen.

And it may be only a pair candlesticks,

but I want the culprit apprehended.

Otherwise, the whole criminal fraternity

will be under the impression that any church is fair game.

- Sarge. - Sarge.

Ventress?

- Sarge? - What are you doing?

Flowers in a police station? What on Earth's going on?

They're for Eltering Church.

Mrs Ventress was rota'd to do them this evening,

but as she's away, obviously, she can't.

I see. So you're going to arrange them, are you?

I was going to stick them in a couple of vases.

Don't underestimate yourself, Alf!

Yeah, I'm sure you'll do a lovely job.

I mean, we all know you've got a flair for things like that.

All right, all right! Somebody's got to do it.

Quite. The show must go on.

I applaud your sense of duty and public spirit, Ventress.

- Be all right on your own? - Yeah, sure.

I'd best look at that kitchen sink.

Oh, it's okay. Phil's dealing with it.

- What, Bellamy? - Yes. Why?

Nothing. I didn't realize he was a plumbing expert.

You don't often see those two in here.

That's understandable, really.

They're hardly the most popular people.

Well, you can't blame the village for that, Jackie.

It's still unfair, Oscar.

I think the owners of Enderby Hall

might have something to say about that.

Simon didn't break into Enderby Hall.

HE CHUCKLES

That's what he says.

They just happened to live nearby, that's all.

There was no real evidence against him.

And you being his solicitor, you would know about that.

Simon was innocent, Oscar.

He was found innocent. Not the same thing.

- Hi. - Hi.

So, the sanitary engineer's arrived, then!

I'm raring to go.

Come on.

Harvey! Harvey!

Harvey!

Harvey!

Harvey!

Not that one, you twerp, the big one.

PHIL: Sorry.

That's it.

GRUNTS It's seized up.

You can fix it, though, can't you?

I certainly hope so, Bellamy!

'Cause you obviously don't have a clue, do you?

'Course I have. I'm, er...

I'm showing Mike what to do.

A likely story.

Wouldn't you say so, Bradley?

THUDS

Mary?

THUD

He's recovered consciousness. We're keeping him under observation,

but you can have a few minutes with him.

Thank you, doctor.

Alf! How are you feeling?

I'm a bit groggy.

I bet you didn't realize flower arranging

was such a dangerous business.

Did you get a chance to see who att*cked you?

No. I heard this noise in the vestry, I walked in, and wallop!

I wish I'd had a chance to apprehend them.

Well, don't worry about it, Alf.

You just concentrate on getting better.

Does Mrs Ventress know?

No. She's visiting her sister in Formby.

We'll give her a call, if you like.

No, you don't have to do that.

I've told them I don't want them to worry her

until they've got my condition stabilised.

That's very thoughtful of you, Alf.

I always try to be, where Mrs Ventress is concerned.

Mr Greengrass!

- What? - Mr Greengrass, I've...

PANTS

- Where's Harvey? - Well, er...

He's got to be washed and groomed. It's his big day tomorrow.

- The thing is... - The thing is, where is he?

Will you spit it out? Where is he?

I've lost him.

You've done what?

MARY: How's Alf?

Minor concussion, but the doctor says he should be out in a few days.

- So, er, what's been taken? - I've made a list.

"Brassware, paintings, chairs."

They haven't left much out, have they?

They've got into the safe as well.

So, what's been taken?

Our silverware.

Strange. It doesn't look like it's been forced.

No. They must have used a key.

Tell me, who normally looks after it?

Reverend Gibbs.

GINA: You can't keep away, can you?

I'm not staying. I just wanted to check the plumbing's okay now.

Yeah. It's working fine. I really appreciate it.

Any time. Let me know if there's anything else you need fixing.

- I will. - Good.

What's wrong?

I've had a bath! I've had two baths, in fact.

I'm only joking!

But here. Just to be sure.

My way of saying thank you.

We think PC Ventress disturbed the thief or thieves

as they were raiding the safe.

They then att*cked him, emptied the safe and scarpered.

I can't believe it. So soon after the other theft.

- Dreadful. - Hmm.

You keep the key to the safe?

That's right. Locked In my bureau in the sitting room.

- Would you check it's still there? - Of course not.

It's been forced!

And the key's gone.

Has anyone had access to the house recently?

- Simon. - Simon?

Simon Cutler, handyman. Lives over at Cooper's Wood.

Ah, yes. I know him.

He and his father have been doing some work for us.

Found him in the kitchen yesterday.

Because we said they could come in and make a drink.

All the same, you gave him the opportunity to take the key.

Perhaps, but I don't think it was him.

How can you be so sure?

Look, I know what people here think of them,

but unlike them, I've taken the trouble to get to know them.

And I trust them.

So, you're sure this is the spot?

He ran in through that gate and ran off that way.

Give me his whatsit.

Here, Alfred. Have a good sniff of that.

Show us where Harvey is, there's a good boy.

Find Harvey!

Not us, Har...

He's about as gormless as you.

He hasn't got a clue.

Why have you let him off the lead for?

Now we've lost him as well.

Alfred!

Alfred!

Come back!

So, the break-in at Enderby Hall.

Simon had been working there a few weeks before.

The owners were convinced he'd done it.

- But he didn't. - Not according to Jackie.

She should know, she defended him.

Look, the old man was a bit strange, but Simon seemed okay.

I suppose they'd be all right if people got off their backs.

- Very nice. - What is?

The new after shave.

Gina gave it to me.

Oh, yeah? What about me?

Oh, I see. I do all the work, and you get all the credit, is that it?

- I'll make it up to you. - You better.

Mr Cutler? Mr Cutler.

Is Simon around?

We'd like a word with him, please.

- Simon? - What?

Sorry to interrupt. We'd just like to ask you a couple of questions.

What questions?

Have you been inside the vicarage in the last few days?

- What if I have? - There was an incident

at Eltering Church last night, the safe was was broken into.

Somebody must have stolen the key from the vicarage.

And you think it was me.

CLEARS THROAT No. No, I didn't say that.

But you have been working at the vicarage.

Oh, so it has to be me!

Well, I'm sick of being blamed when something like this happens.

No one can ever think of anyone else to lay it on, but me.

Simon, all we're trying to do is find out the truth.

If you're innocent, we can eliminate you from our enquiries, okay?

The vicar said I could go into the house.

Yeah, I'm aware of that, Simon.

I thought he trusted us.

Well? Satisfied?

Is this yours, Simon?

It was under your bed.

It's mine.

Dad!

It's mine. What of it?

I think we should continue this down at the station.

Gina.

- It's working a treat now. - Good.

Do you mind telling me what's going on?

- What do you mean? - Between you and Bellamy.

What are you talking about? Nothing's going on.

Well, there seems to be no limits to his desire to please you.

SIGHS He's just being nice, that's all.

And he likes helping out around the place.

Look, he's fixed the sink,

and now he's offered to look at the upstairs' toilet system.

Oh, has he?

Look, we're not trying to make you feel redundant, Oscar.

I don't. It wasn't Bellamy that fixed that sink in the first place.

You what? HE CHUCKLES

He got Mike Bradley to do it.

Bellamy wouldn't know a U-bend from a ball cock.

I worked for it.

- What, over £? - Yes.

Simply by doing odd jobs for your father?

SIMON: We work hard.

When you can find work, which can't be that often.

It isn't.

My client has explained how he came by the money.

The fact that he works hard and lives frugally, and save money,

hardly constitutes evidence against him.

- Just trying to get at the truth. - My client's told you the truth.

You're wasting your time. They've already decided I did it.

- MICHAEL: That's not true. - Isn't it?

Without evidence, there's no way they can charge you.

I don't believe you. You and he are married.

That doesn't make any difference. I'm here to protect your interests.

SIMON: You're not getting very far.

It would help to know where you were at the time of the theft.

Your father's confirmed you weren't at the cottage.

- I've told you. I went for a walk. - Where, Simon?

- Don't remember. - Why are you being so evasive?

I'm not being evasive,

but you lot have got it in for me, whatever I say.

Joe, what is it?

-Reverend! -Come in.

Take a seat.

Tell us what's happened.

- It's Simon. - What about Simon?

The police. They took him. They think he stole from the church.

- That's hardly surprising. - Mum!

What's happened to Simon?

They think...

They think...

They think he broke into this house and took the key.

They found money. Help him, please.

They won't listen to us, but they'll believe you.

I'm not really sure if I can intervene.

Why not?

Well, if the police have their suspicions,

they have to follow them up

You'll let them blame him whether he did it or not?

That won't happen.

I'm sorry to say this, Joe, but Simon has been working here.

He did have the opportunity.

Perhaps we'll have to face the possibility

that he may be responsible.

SNIFFS No.

How much longer is this going to go on, Sergeant?

For as long as it takes, Mrs Bradley.

So far, you haven't produced a shred of evidence.

We've established that Simon has a large amount of cash,

that he had the opportunity to break into the vicarage,

and that he's unable or unwilling to give us a convincing account

of where he was at the time of the robbery.

That doesn't make him guilty.

But that makes him a suspect I cannot possibly ignore.

This is not some trivial theft. One of my officers was assaulted.

I'm aware of that... KNOCK AT DOOR

Sorry to interrupt, Sarge...

He was with me when the church was broken into, weren't you, Simon?

We're in love. We had to keep it a secret because of my parents.

If they find out, they'll stop us seeing each other.

Is this why you wouldn't say where you were?

- Yes. - KAREN: The money's for us.

We've been saving so we can get away from here and make a life together.

SHEEP BLEATING

CLAUDE: Harvey!

I think Alfred must definitely be on the scent, Mr Greengrass.

What good is that to us when we don't know where he is now?

You've got some explaining to do to Mrs Benton, you have.

DOG BARKS IN DISTANCE

Hold on, Mr Greengrass.

Mr Greengrass!

Look!

Someone took that key from the reverend Gibbs' desk.

Since ther was no sign of a break-in at the house,

what are the alternatives?

It's hardly feasible that Ruth Gibbs or Karen knocked out Alf Ventress.

Which only leaves the Reverend Gibbs, doesn't it?

Yes, it does. What do we know about him?

Only that he hasn't been vicar there for very long.

Right. See what you can find out about him.

Better do the round of the second-hand dealers again.

Find out if anyone's been offered the stolen goods.

Yes, Sarge.

Bellamy, any news of Alf?

Yeah, I phoned the hospital this morning. Apparently, he's improving.

Mrs Ventress is back.

Apparently, she's been nursing him by his bedside.

Should be just the tonic he needed. The love of a good woman.

Well done, Alfred. Good boy. I knew he'd find him.

CLAUDE: We still have to get him from over there to over here.

I thought I might tempt him across with one of them.

You tog! I don't want him in that water. He'll get filthy.

- What are we going to do? - You'll have to wade over.

DAVID: Then I'll get wet.

You got us into this. Get us out of it.

I'll take the bucket. Go on.

It's freezing!

Think of the hot water you'll be in if you don't go and get him!

- Come on! - Harvey.

Here, Harvey.

Sorry, Mr Greengrass!

You will be!

Afternoon.

Hello. What can I do for you?

- I was wondering about this chair. - Ah, yes.

Lovely piece. Bought it yesterday.

Can you tell me where it came from?

A chap over in Ashfordly by the name of Oakes.

Why are you asking?

Look, this has gone far enough.

Really? You think so?

I want nothing more to do with you.

I think you're a bit hasty saying that,

given your esteemed position in this community.

Please, just leave us alone now.

Look, you got yourself into this situation.

You've only yourself to blame if you think it's got out of hand.

- Oh, no! - Where are you going?

SHOP BELL

Are you sure it was Reverend Gibbs?

- Yes, Sarge. - You think he saw you?

I'm pretty sure.

Well, it looks like Oakes and Reverend Gibbs have colluded

in the theft some way.

I suggest you go up and see the Reverend Gibbs immediately.

Yes, Sarge.

Simon Cutler, of all people.

-I don't want to talk about it. -Well, I do!

- How long has this been going on? - It's none of your business!

Of course it is!

You're scarcely years old, you've got exams coming up,

and you get involved with an odd-job man, a thief!

- He's not a thief! - He is!

Why can't you accept that he stole that stuff?

He didn't. He was with me.

Why are you so unwilling to stand up for him?

- I thought you liked him and Joe. - I did...

What has changed? Why didn't you doing anything?

Oh, don't bother trying to explain. You're just like everyone else!

Excuse me. I'm looking for PC Ventress.

He's through there.

OSCAR: Oh, thanks.

Hello, Alf.

Hello, Sarge.

I brought you some grapes.

That's very kind of you. Ta.

So, how you feeling, then?

I'm not out of the woods yet, by any means.

You look pretty good to me.

Well, brave face and all that.

I don't want to upset Mrs Ventress anymore than she needs me.

She's been in to see you, has she?

Several times.

She tried to persuade the doctor so she could nurse me at home,

but I told them I'd be better off in here for a while.

So, uh, what's still wrong with you then?

Erm... well, I'm still a bit groggy from that bang on the head.

I've told them that whilst I'm here I should have a thorough checkup.

I've still got one or two twinges which I think they should look into.

Yeah. I'm sure you have, Alf.

Mr Greengrass, I've had an idea.

Why don't we enter Alfred in the dog competition?

It would surprise me slighttly if they had a class for lurchers.

No, I mean as a poodle. I reckon, with a bit of work,

I could make Alfred look like Harvey.

What are you going to do for an encore, the loaves and the fishes?

STARTS ENGINE Where are you going?

Over to Mrs Benton's, see if Harvey's gone back there.

In the meantime, why don't you get busy

with your magic wand and your curling tongs?

See if you can save us from this disaster.

Alfred? Alfred, come here.

KNOCK AT DOOR

Rest yourself. I'll go.

Mrs Gibbs, can we have another word with your husband, please?

Come in.

Thomas, the, er, police are here to see you.

Excuse me.

How can I help you?

Harvey?

Harvey!

Come on, son. Harvey!

HE SIGHS

It was obviously someone else, someone who looks like me.

I saw you coming out of that shop very clearly, Reverend Gibbs.

All right.

Yes, it was me.

It was stupid. And, yes, I feel very ashamed.

But we've been very hard up since we came here.

I felt I had to do something.

I took the candlesticks to Oakes,

but he found out who I was and demanded I help him.

He threatened me and said he'd tell the police.

In the end, I said yes.

So you gave him the keys to the safe?

Yes.

And it was Oakes who att*cked PC Ventress?

Yes. I never thought anything like that would happen.

I thought he'd leave us alone,

but then he asked me to get the key to St Barnabas' safe.

I said no.

What?

It's gone.

Excuse me.

- This is Harvey. - I'm sorry?

Mrs Benton's dog. I'm entering him for the pedigree poodle competition.

In the what?

Poodle competition.

You've as much chance of winning the poodle class with that

as I have of becoming the next Pope!

You might try entering for that competition, if you like.

Oh, right! Thank you.

Simon, what are you doing out here?

Thinking.

Look, it's not going to work, Karen.

It's not that I don't love you, it's just...

- I'm never going to be accepted. - Somewhere else, you could be.

I don't think so. You deserve someone better, Karen.

I want you! Don't you understand that?

'Course I do. But you'd be making a mistake.

You have to let me decide that, you can't do it for me.

I'm sorry.

You stupid French animal.

Come on. You do this again...

..and I'll have you deported. Come on.

And the winner of the Best Mutt competition is Harvey,

owned by Mrs Edith Benton.

AUDIENCE APPLAUDING

'Will the owner of a blue Ford Zodiac, SFE...'

CLAUDE: Leave it!

You don't know where it's been.

Excuse me. I'd like to enter this dog in the Standard Poodle Class.

You must be joking!

Do I look amused? Just get his name down.

I'm afraid it's out of the question that a bedraggled specimen like that

should be allowed to enter

a prestigious competition like we have here.

Don't let the muck fool you. He's so well-bred,

if he could speak, he wouldn't talk to either of us.

Hey, excuse me, young man.

Excu... Excuse me!

DAVID: Mr Greengrass!

Mr Greengrass! We won!

- We what? - Me and Alfred...

- I mean, me and Harvey. We won! - Won what?

- Best Mutt! - Best what?

Here y'are. Look. Shh! Look at that.

We're gonna have Harvey's name engraved on it.

She'll never know that's not for Best Poodle.

And, er... The prize money.

David, you are sometimes worth your weight in gold.

Shame it's not often. Come on.

DOGS BARKING EXCITEDLY

WHISPERS Phil, I'll take the vestry,

you find somewhere to hide in here, all right?

Stop. Police!

So, Ruth stole the candlesticks.

Yes.

But it didn't stop there, did it, Reverend?

No.

I realized she must have taken the key to the safe

and given it to Oakes.

So I made it look like someone forced the bureau.

And that's where Simon comes in.

Yes.

And I'm not proud of that.

And what about Oakes?

I tried to make him stop, to leave us alone.

But your wife contacted him and gave the key to St Barnabas.

You must understand that it's been very hard for her.

Being a vicar's wife isn't exactly glamorous.

She's made so many sacrifices for me.

I suppose she saw a way of changing things.

I suppose she did.

Maybe I should have known that I'm not enough for her.

Perhaps I never was.

Simon?

I couldn't do it. I couldn't leave you.

I'm sorry.

Oh, Simon. My mum and dad are in trouble.

I know, I heard.

It'll be all right.

You'll see.

Alf, how are you feeling?

Well, I've been given a clean bill of health.

That's wonderful news.

That's what Mrs Ventress said.

She was ready to nurse me at home.

Really? I bet you can't wait to get back there now.

Not that much of a rush. Pint of best, please, Gina.

Why did you let them engrave it in the first place?

She'll expect something engraved on it.

I might as well talk to meself.

You realise we've got to buy another cup and have it engraved?

That's going to cost all the prize money!

Exactly! And whose fault's that?

Ah, Claude! There you are.

Er, Mrs Benton.

Hey, look, Harvey. Mummy's here!

We didn't expect you back so soon.

My brother's better. Well? How did it go?

Harvey! Whatever's happened?

He's been enjoying himself, haven't you?

But don't worry. He walked it.

Really? So he's a champion at last?

He certainly is.

Excellent! And that the trophy?

Er, yes. But if you'll excuse me, I've just remembered,

we've got a very urgent appointment. Come on, son.

Come and see mummy. There we are. David!

Can't I buy you a celebratory drink?

That's very kind of you.

We'll have it another time. It really is urgent. David...

Just a minute. What's this? "Best Mutt"?

Claude! Come back here!

Claude!

Another satisfied customer, eh?

Yeah, looks like it. Right. My round? Same again?

Thanks, Phil.

- It's nice, by the way. - What is?

- The aftershave. - Well, you chose it.

But by rights, I should have bought one for Mike, too.

Sorry?

Well, I take it you didn't conquer the drains single-handed after all!

Ah, er, well... Not exactly.

I mean, it was a two-man job. I needed help.

But you'll be able to fix the loo and that light switch on your own?

Definitely. I'm sure.

More or less. THEY CHUCKLE