03x16 - Das Spoot/Sqotters

[bunniefuu]

[ Lively dance music playing]

♪ A-a-a-angry beavers

♪ Beavers.

[ Birds chirping]

Norbert: all righty, daggy-doopy.

The first one to dive to the bottom

Wins, and the loser is a puny-lung-ed

Lame-o beaver for life!

Yeah, tells me how it goes again.

That's my little sea monkey!

Hey, hey, hey, wait for me, you spooty cheater-head!

[ Grunting...]

[ Grunting and groaning]

[ Muttering]

[ Gasping and panting]

[ Coughing]

Forget about the game, you doof.

Forget about what?

We've discovered a mysterious bottomless nether region in our pondy.

We will undertake a momentous journey

Into the briny brininess of the unknown.

To discover the undiscovereded.

To chart the unchartereded

And give name to the heretofore unname-ed.

[ Snickering]

Or maybe we'll find some sunken pirate shoes.

♪ Yo-ho-ho-ho-ho.♪

Thar she blows, daggy!

The majestic norbulus!

[ Scoffs] the norbulus.

The norbulus!

All right, how come my name's not on it?

I helped build the subma...

Subma-ma... The subma-thingy, too.

But it is, dagga-dingle.

In the language of the noble seafaring ancient greeks

"Norbulus" means daggett.

Coolalus.

Prepare to get underway, swabbie third class daggett!

Oy-oy, cap'one norbie!

That's "aye-aye, cap'n."

Aye-aye... Me-me?

You-you, cap'n! Huh?

Daggett [ imitating sonar]: pung... Pung... Pung...

Pung... Pung...

Pung... Pung...

Pung, pung, pung...

Dag, would you cut it out already?!

Fine! Hey, hey, I'll man the torpedoes instead.

We don't have any torpedoes, you big doof.

We are a sub o'science.

We come in peace!

Whoever heard of a submarine without torpedoes?

Me.

What if we're ambushed

By a puma or the swedish navy?

Dag, would you quit your swabbin' bay-buffoonery?!

Commanding a modrensubmarine

Requires complete concentration.

Now just sit there and don't touch anything!

Fine, you spooty old bossy submarine, um...

Bossy guy!

Cap'n.

Cap'n b... G... Guy!

Eh... Eeh.

Eh?

[ Whistling...]

[ Alarm sounding, bells ringing...]

[ Grunting]

[ Screaming]

[ Brakes screech, alarm stops]

Yee...!

Dag, you moronified, doofusy

Lame-brain-ed idiot head!

Look what you've done!

What?

You've jeopardized

Our sacred scientific mission.

Me...?!

You were the one driving.

Ghee...

Ghee who?

Dag!

Huh?

Look!

[ Horse whinnying]

Norbert: ah, yes...

Another splendid specimen to add to cap'n norbert's collection

Of mysterious and scienterrific things I discovered on the bottom.

Let's see... I shall call you...

Long, black, wiggly wet thingy!

Hum-p-ph!

Simpleton.

It is obviously a perfect example of a...

Wormi waterus norbertinsi

And it was discover-ed by me here, on the great norbert banks

Halfway between the norbianus trench and rift de la norbe.

Which is right next to the famous deep, winding, craggy, rocky hole...

Ooh! Tic-tac... Oh, spoot, lost again.

Dag, would you quit your moreonic yammering?!

Can't you see that a pea-brain like you has no business in the busyness of science?

F... Ine!

I don't care about all this spooty old sciency stuff anyway.

I'm going to go find some really cool not-sciency junk

And name it after moy.

Good!

Gooder!

[ Grumbling]: muttering angrily.

I hate you, spooty-headed science hogger norbuttface.

I'll show him how to discover stuff... Probably.

[ Shrieks]

Ah!

[ Gasps]

Eurethra!

I found something, ha-ha!

And I'm going to name it after something really important.

I'm going to name it after me! [ Laughs]

Let's see... I'll call you dagamethingy.

[ Gurgling]

[ Organ playing]

[ Organ continues playing]

[ In james mason voice]: "these fine specimens will soon garner me

"The respect and admiration of my colleagues

In the hallow-ed halls of science..."

[ Normal voice]: not to mention the lucrative merchandising possibilities!

[ Banging on hull]

Ghee!

Na-nanny-nanny-na-na!

Norby-norby-nor-nor!

I found something much cooler sciency round thingy

And you didn't... La-la-la-la...

La-la.

[ Rattling]

Ah!

[ Gibbering...]

[ Gibbering]

Oh-ah... Norbie!

[ Gurgling]: help!

Hang in there, daggie little buddy!

I'll save you from the gooey clutches of that slimy beast...

That would make an excellent addition to my collection.

If I let it eat dag, then I could tow it to the surface...

[ Gurgling yelling]

But I couldn't live with myself.

Well, I could, but there'd be too many questions.

Stand by for emergency extraction!

[ Gibbering]

Daggie! [ Coughing]

You're back! [ Coughing]

Big hug!

[ Thud]

[ Screaming...]

Norbie, norbie!

He's sucking our sub apart!

Hang on, dag.

I'm going to try and shake him loose.

H-hey, come on, norbie, we got to get out of here!

[ In james mason voice]: no, dag, you go on.

Save yourself.

For I must go down with my ship

And all of my glorious discoveries...

[ In dramatic voice]: snap out of it, man!

The world of sciency stuff needs you!

I... Need you.

[ Normal voice]: well, most of the time.

Sometimes, but not a lot, okay?

All right, I get it!

Come on, swabbie.

It's time to proceed to the emergency exits!

Abandon sub!

[ expl*si*n]

Yee...!

[ Laughing]

Cap'n!

Oy-oy, cap'n.

I blame you!

Me?! You're the one

Who brought back the snail!

Yeah, well, I wouldn't have

If we were looking for pirate shoes

Instead of spooty old sciency norbulus stuff!

You will obey the cap'n

Or you will walk the plank!

You megalomania beaver.

You're nothing but a mop boy.

Oy-oy, cap'n! Oy-oy, oy-oy...

I'm going up to the cap'n's quarters.

You go down and, uh, swab the poop deck...

[ Squawking]

[ Grunting and panting]

Are the re-sick-lables ready for re-sick-ling?

Ooh, yeah, yeah, yeah... Ready-beady, norbie, noobie.

Excelente,my little eco-conscientious cohort.

Huh? Hey...

Oops!

[ Sloshing]

Ah... Wait a minute.

Ah...!

Yech...

Ah... Yummy.

That was close, huh, norbie?

I almost recycled some perfectly good yahoo.

Now if we could only recycle your brain.

Wow, can they do that?

I can dream, can't i?

Come on, mr. Re-psycho.

[ Grunting...]

[ Grumbling...]

[ Grumbling] ...oof!

"The otturs residunts"

Hmm... Good spelling.

[ Flies buzzing]

[ Whimpering]

Hey...!

Who turned our door into a phone?!

It's not a phone, you numby-skull.

It's high-tech home security system ache-cess keypad.

Ache-cecuss? Cool.

No, dag....

Don't...

[ Beeping]

[ Alarm sounding]

Both: yee...!

[ Beeping, alarm stops]

I'm sorry about all that rigmarole, boys.

It's my newfangled home security system.

I just had it installed.

Oh, good heavens, where are my manners at?

The name's big old papa daddy, river otter-at-large.

At your service.

Service-- I like that.

But my friends call me big "o".

Hey, big "o".

Shut my mouth.

And y'all must be norbert and daggett.

Well, come on in. Come in.

[ Both gasping]

Hey, everybody, listen here.

Say hello to norbert there and daggett over there.

They're the beavers who used to live here.

All: howdy!

Used to live here?!

What do you mean "used to live here?"

Well, uh, what I mean is, uh, you usedto live here.

Then me and my kin come along and we claimed it.

Norbert: you did?

Big "o": and now, you don't live here.

And just what makes you think

You can just otter in here

And take over our humbly abo-deh?

Why, the law of nature, of course.

Oh.

I refer your attention

To section five, paragraph three of the natural laws of nature.

"Heretowhit... River otters are entitled to inhabit

"And claim for their own any and all vacated

And unoccupied beaver residences..." Oof!

Huh?

[ Laughs] in other words...

Finders keepers, losers... [ Chuckles] ...beavers

Oh, that makes sense.

Ha! And poppycock, sir!

Your case will never hold up in court!

Order in the court! Order in the court!

Otters win, beavers lose. Case closed.

Thank you, cousin.

Cousin?

You're welcome, cousin.

And thank you for this lovely cuddly gift.

I shall treasure it always.

Get your spooty ottery paws off...

Dag! Down!

Order in the court!

[ Thumping and yelling]

[ Chomping]

Bread and water... Bread and water...

Day in, day out.

Nothing but bread and... [ Spits] water!

But that's okay.

I happen to love bread and...

[ Wheezing]

Wa... Wa... Wa...

Water...

Water!

What are you looking at?!

Pooty otters.

[ Grumbling]

You mean "spooty"?

Don't bother me, I'm grousing.

Okay.

Otter-ray-headed dumb judge guy thingy!

I'm in jail, norby!

I'm a jailbird!

I'm in the joint, the big house

The slammer...

The hoot-sow!

That's "hoosegow".

Whatever! What's a... Who's a cow? [ Moo]

Forget it.

Who's a cow?

Don't worry your dinky dim head about it

For I have discover-ed a loopedhole in said law

That will help us get our house back.

I'm going to use their own law against them.

According to

The law... If otters go outside the dam, even for a second

It will be deem-ed legally vacant

Henceforth and forthwith.

All I have to do is trick said otters

Into going to said outside

And we can reclaim-ed said domicile for our own.

[ Clanging]

Hey, mon chers,come and get it!

Yessirree, come and get

Some of cousin norbert's famous cajun-style otter buffet!

I gots all y'all's favorites: oysters, abalone, clams, crawfish...

And the coupy de gracy...

Spicy hot fish head gumbo!

Mmm! It's paw-licking good!

That's mighty kind of you, cousin norbert

But me and my kin have recently sworn off the consumption of seafood

Due to the alarming levels of toxic contaminants found in today's waterways.

[ Gagging]

[ Vomiting...]

My, my, my...

That's a pitiful sight.

Nothing more foul than a bout of the tainted fish gumbo vapors.

I demand my rights! I want a lawyer!

But not norbie, okay?

I want a good one, okay?

No justice, no quietness!

[ Clanging]

No justice, no quietness!

Ee...

Hey! Hey, it's dark in here.

How about a night light or something?

[ Muffled]: come on... Please... I'll be quiet.

Hello...?

Hello-oh...?

[ Sawing]

Okay, my little otter friends, prepare to be spook-ed by...

The scariest ghost you've ever seen!

Boo...!

What do you suppose that is?

Why it looks to me like a poorly crafted pinata.

Get some sticks, boys!

Let's bust her open!

[ Cheering]

Whoo!

All right!

No...!

Ee...

Hey, you spooty otter heads!

Don't eat all the candy.

Save some for me.

[ Snoring...]

I let you down, daggie.

My legalist maneuvering

Was outmanured by the wise and wily otters.

Don't worry about it, norbie...

Shh, shh... Eh, eh, eh...

[ Whispers]: don't worry about it, norbie.

You did the best you could.

[ Louder]: all these otterheads want to do is lie around

[ Whispers]: on our couches and eat

[ Louder]: snacks!

No wonder you couldn't get them to go outside.

Eureka! Dag, that's it! You're a ghee-nius!

If everything they want is inside

Then why should they go outside?

All we have to do is take the inside and put it outside.

But the first thing we got to do is get you out of there.

[ Grunting]

Yeah... Wait, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh.

I'm on it, norbie.

Here, try this.

Tell me you weren't about to climb back in there.

I weren't.

[ Snoring]

[ Clattering]

What in tarnation...?

Great hobgoblins, boys.

We've been pil-fred, burgled, violated...

Our precious possessions appropriated without our prior consent, by gummy!

[ Yawning]

Hey, look over to yonder.

Well, I'll be an old possum's jiggly part.

Well, what are you waiting for, boys?

[ Door slams]

[ Cheering]

Oh, what a bunch of doofs!

They fell for it!

Suckers!

Our dam is ours again!

All ours, baby!

Yeah, baby!

[ Gasps]

[ Flies buzzing]

[ All cheering...]

Hmm... Well, that didn't work out quite the way I planned.

Dag, what are you doing?!

I'm throwing out that stupid law book of yours right now, see?

You're the one who left the door open in the first place!

So long, cousin norbert and cousin daggett.

And thanks much for packing up all your things for us!

Y'all take care now.