02x17 - Faith Evans

[bunniefuu]

Guys, I need your attention.

We know, kev. Show starts in minutes.

No. I'm afraid I have some bad news.

What happened?

What?

It's about...

It's about...

It's about the big ear of corn!

What?

What?no.corn?

Kevin...

Tell us!

[Beeping sound]

Doctor, can we see the big ear of corn?

Are you the cobbs?

No. No, we're not family.

We work with the big ear of corn, sir.

Oh. All right. Just for a moment.

[Gasping]

What is it, doc?

I really can't say. I'm not a corn specialist.

All I can do now is watch and wait.

Doctor, is there anything we can do?

I'm afraid not.

What kind of a doctor are you?

Do something!

Do something!

[Sobbing]

She didn't mean it, sir. Sorry.

She just really loves that big ear of corn a lot.

We all do.

I think you all should go now.

There's really nothing more you can do.

[Sobbing]

Come on, guys.

But...

What if he wakes up and I'm not here!?

It's o.k. It's o.k.

[Pop]

♪ Cornbayah, my corn

♪ Cornbayah

♪ Cornbayah, my corn ♪

Everyone, I have a little surprise for you all.

Kenan!

It's the big ear of corn!

So what was wrong with the corn?

Nothing. It turns out that the big ear of corn

Wasn't even sick at all.

Katrina!

[Baby sounds]

Fresh out the box.

Stop, look, and watch.

Ready yet? Get set.

It'sall that.

♪ Oh

♪ Uh-oh

♪ This is all that♪

♪ This is all that♪

♪ Check it, check it

♪ Now, this is just an introduction ♪

♪ Before we blow your mind ♪

♪ The show is all of that ♪

♪ And yes, we do it all the time ♪

♪ So sit your booty on the floor ♪

♪ Or in a chair

♪ On the ground or in the air ♪

♪ Just don't go nowhere

♪ 'Cause everything we do

♪ Is all of that

♪ We're entertaining you

♪ We're all of that

♪ My posse and my crew

♪ It's all of that

♪ So sit still

♪ 'Cause we're comin' right back ♪

♪ Oh

♪ Uh-oh

♪ This is all that♪

♪ This is all that♪

♪ Check it out

♪ Oh

♪ Uh-oh

♪ This is all that♪

♪ This is all that♪♪

Captioning made possible by nickelodeon

And u.s. Department of education

Girl: hungry?

Boy: yeah.

Can you pass me that cheeze fiz?

Come on.

Freeze!

Aarrrggghhh!

Aaaaah!

Aaaaaggggghhhhhh!

Cheese police.

O.k. Cue the music.

♪ Bad cheese

♪ Bad cheese

♪ Whatcha gonna do

♪ Whatcha gonna do

♪ When there's cheese on you ♪

All right. Get on the ground!

Cheese police?

Now, spread 'em.

Officer colby! Look!

Just like I thought. Cheese fiz.

Look at the expiration date.

It's not even fresh.

Come here.

You got a license for this cheese?

What's it to ya?

Ahh...punk!

Colby! Refrigerator!

Outta my way!

Open.

That's enough cheese to last forever!

All right! Start talking.

Come on. Spill the cheese!

Fine. Fine.

I can wait till your parents get home.

Don't talk!yeah. They'll probably ground for ...

Maybe even weeks!

Don't talk!no riding your bike, no talking on the phone!

And no...t.v.!

I'll talk!!!

Oh, yeah.

I'll talk! I'll talk!

Girl: quiet, lester.

No! You be quiet!

It happened like this, colby.

We rode our bikes down to the market

And, well...

One thing led into another, and...

And before I knew it,

We had bought pounds of cheese.

And how much of this cheese did you eat, son?

Me? I only had this cream cheese right here.

I swear it, colby.

Cream cheese.

Do you realize the fat content

Of pure cream cheese?

Do you?

You want me to read the label?

"% Saturated fat."

Noo-oo-oo-oo!

And I won't even talk about the cholesterol

Because you're just a boy.

Officer colby! Over here!

Who did the grilled cheese sandwiches?

I did.

Get over here!

Now! Come on.

I'm sorry! I thought I could handle it!

Do you feel good?

No!

Do you feel like a big man?

No!

Get this cheese out of here.

Take these girls down to the lab.

Get them out of here. You're working on my nerves.

Get 'em out!

You'll pay for this, colby!

Not in this lifetime, string cheese!

Get outta here!

Get outta here.

Come here, son.

Come on, you're going home to mama.

Mama? Noo-oo-oo!

You stay back, colby!

Look out! He's got a cheese bat!

Aaargh!

You! Back!

Throw him the walkie-talkie. I'll talk him down.

Here.

You're not taking me to my mother, colby!

Lester! Lester!

Can you hear me?

Yeah. I hear you, colby.

Throw down the cheese bat.

No! You'll grab me.

I don't want to grab you, son.

I don't know where you've been.

You could be all sweaty.

Now, drop the cheese bat.

Let's go play some tennis.

Come on.

Tennis?

You mean it?

This late at night?

Come on.

I know a place that's lit up.

Just you and me.

I got my tennis racquet in the car.

Let's go. Just you and me.

Tennis. Come on.

Tennis?

Yeah. Just hand me the bat.

Come on. Just hand me the cheese bat.

Come on, son. Hand me the cheese bat.

No! Gimme!

[Grunting]

You said we were gonna play tennis, colby!

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And I once ate a dog biscuit.

But you don't see me doing this--

Arf arf arf!

Awoo!

Do ya? Get him outta here!

We'll meet again, colby!

You'll pay for this!

Yeah.

Man: officer colby! Officer colby!

Cheese police needed on the scene

Of fourth and cheddar in the blue cheese district.

Code brie.

If it isn't one cheese, it's another.

Come on. Come with me.

And now, lori beth denberg

With more vital information for your everyday life.

If your sister gets a phone call and you answer it,

Don't say, "my sister ain't here.

She's out in the yard flopping in the mud!"

Girls, it's a bad idea to fill your bra

With water and goldfish and then tell people

You've invented the double-cup aquarium.

If you want a good grade on a test,

Don't write at the top of the page,

"Dear teacher. I didn't study for this test.

P.s.-- School is stupid!"

This has been lori beth denberg

With vital information.

♪ This is all that ♪

♪ This is all that ♪♪

[Bell rings]

Good afternoon, students.

I trust you all enjoyed lunch.

I, myself, consumed a tasty chicken pot pie.

Teachers love chicken pie.

Cockle-doodle-pie! Ha ha ha!

Any-hoo, let's have a look-see

At a map of the world.

Kooky map!

Perhaps if I yank it harder.

Oops!

Ouch! The map sucked my arm right up!

You want me to get janet augashus?

Oh, no! I'm afraid

Janet augashus is out sick today

With a fungus.

I'm beginning to lose feeling in my thumb.

Who can we get to help miss fingerly?

[Soaring sound]

[Crashing sound]

What was that?

That was me!

Yuk yuk yuk.

I'm repairman-man-man-man.

You're a repairman?

I'm therepairman.

I can fix anything. Heh heh.

Something tells me that this world map

Is giving you a "world" full of trouble.

Hmm. Poetic.

Can you repair it?

Sure I can!

I can fix that for you in half a jiffy.

You know why? Because I'm...

Repairman-man-man-man...

Yuk yuk yuk!

What's with the echo?

Never you mind! I have to save the world now.

Stand back, ma'am.

I can't. My arm is tangled in the map.

I'll yank it.

Ouch! Ouch, golly!

My triceps is throbbing--

Oh!

That map won't be giving you any more trouble.

I repaired it.

Oh, you've torn australia.

Don't thank me.

I shan't.

[Squeak squeak]

Uh-oh. That young lady's desk

Seems a wee bit wobbly.

It rocks a little.

I can fix that wicked wobble for you.

Stand aside.

Um, I'm outta here.

There ya go.

No more wobble.

Thanks.

Sit down there.

Uh-oh.

I hear radiator

♪ Troooouble! ♪

Please! Pay no attention to the radiator.

It just needs a little--

Oh! Oh, no!

Heavens! I'm being steam-cleaned!

Oh, my, but this is moist!

That's just the kind of service

You can expect from

Repairman-man-man-man...

Yuk yuk yuk.

Your service is horrid.

You're the opposite of a repairman...

Man-man-man-man. Now, go!

No!

All right, then!

You've forced me to go to the window

And shriek for help!

Help! Myself and schoolchildren

Are being tormented by a road repairman!

Help!

[cr*ck]

Ouch! Owee!

Ouch! I'm trapped.

This window is stuck!

Stuck window?

That sounds like a job for...

Students: repairman-man-man-man...

[Chain saw sound]

Yuk yuk yuk!

[Screaming]

Tune in next week

For the continuing adventures of...

Repairman-man-man-man...

♪ This isall that ♪♪

Doctor prober, your next patient

Is ready to see you.

Oh. Send them in.

Uh, all right.

What's the matter?

Well, I just wanted to warn you

That your next patient is, well,

Rather foreign.

So? Ain't nothing wrong with no foreigners.

I like foreigners.

Good friends. That's all right.

O.k. I'll go get him.

I am ishboo.

Hi, ishboo. I'm doctor prober.

Dr. Prober.

Pew!

Please sniff my shoe.

Ishboo, why do you want me to sniff your shoe?

Well, in my foreign land

A doctor can always tell what is wrong with you

By inhaling your foot odor.

I don't... I'll sniff your shoe later, all right?

Sit over there on the table.

Okey-dokey.

All right.

Ishboo, how do you feel?

Like this.

Ho ho ho!

No, no! I mean, how's your health, ishboo?

Oh. Well, I'm having many pains in my fector.

In your fector?

W-w-w-where's your fector?

Between my splinkes and my diderer.

Oh-oh-of course. Never mind.

Ishboo, just open your mouth and say "ah."

[Mimicking] ah-ah-ah.

Just say "ah."

Ah-ah-ah.

Just like that.

[Crunch]

No, ishboo!

Mmm. That's good wood.

But you ate my ah-ah stick.

Ah. You must give me the recipe.

It was delicious.

Ishboo, let me just check your reflexes.

Cross your legs.

Yes, ma'am.

That's quite all right, ishboo.

[Whap]

[Crick-cr*ck]

Ishboo, you hit my face.

Well, you hit my knee.

[Whap]

Stop hitting my face.

Stop hitting my knee.

Ishboo, let me check your heart.

Oh, how sweet.

[Pulsating drum b*at]

Ishboo, where are you from?

What?!

Ohhh!

Don't yell into my stethoscope.

I am sorry.

I have upset my doctor.

Please just put me to sleep.

Oh, no, no, ishboo. I'm sorry.

It's all right.

I'm not going to put you to sleep.

Let me just check your ears.

That's all right?

[Alarm sounds]

Oh.

Let me check the other ear.

Okey-dokey.

Oh, my.

So, how does it look in my head, doctor?

Um, ishboo, um...

I'm afraid I'm gonna have to give you a sh*t.

I'm afraid you'd better think again.

It's only gonna hurt a bit, now.

Look at my swinging jewel.

Now, go to sleep.

When I snap my fingers again,

You will put the needle down

And quietly walk out the door.

[Snap]

Daaaahhhhh!

Ooouch!

Oh! Oh! Oh!

Ouch! Ouch! Ouch!

Ouch! Ooh ooh!

I'm gonna get--

Abla abla abla-- ouch!

Oh, well. Close enough.

Excuse me. Are you the doctor?

Why, yes, I am.

Hey, clavis! Wake up.

The show's over.

Oh, yeah. Kick it!