04x09 - A Magnificent Obsession

[bunniefuu]

[RIK HOWARD & BOB WIRTH'S

"TOGETHER" PLAYING]

♪ Here we are, face to face ♪

♪ A couple of silver spoons ♪

♪ Hopin' to find

We're two of a kind ♪

♪ Making a go

Making it grow ♪

♪ Together ♪

♪ We're gonna find our way ♪

♪ Together ♪

♪ Taking the time each day ♪

♪ To learn all about

Those things ♪

♪ You just can't buy ♪

♪ Two silver spoons together ♪

♪ You and I together ♪

♪ We're gonna find our way ♪

♪ You and I together ♪

♪ We're gonna find our way ♪

♪ You and I together ♪

[GLENN FREY'S "YOU BELONG

TO THE CITY" PLAYING]

♪ You belong to the city ♪

♪ You belong to the night ♪

♪ Living in a river

Of darkness ♪

♪ Beneath the neon lights ♪

♪ You were born in the city ♪

♪ Concrete under your feet... ♪

[SIGHS]

You're saving threes,

aren't you?

No, I'm not.

You mean if I discard this,

you promise not to use it?

I promise.

Gin! Ha-ha-ha!

Oh, you!

I look really stupid, right?

Absolutely not.

I knew it.

This outfit is terrible.

I blew three months'

clothing allowance,

just to look

like Zippy the Pinhead.

Don't be silly.

You look like you should be

on the cover of a magazine.

Yeah, True Geek.

What are you so nervous about?

This girl must

really be something.

Dad, this is not just a girl.

This is Amanda Belson.

She's incredible.

She's got these eyes...

and these lips...

and these teeth...

and these--

That's...

far enough, bud.

[CHUCKLES]

I still can't believe

I had the nerve to ask her out.

I still can't believe

she said yes.

I still can't believe

I said,

"Golly, are you sure?"

I take it you're not eating

at Bun 'n Run.

No, we're having dinner

at Pierre's.

[WHISTLES]

Whoa.

That should

sweep her off her feet. Whoo!

Yeah. That place

is supposed to be great.

The only thing that can

go wrong tonight is me.

Rick, relax.

The important thing to remember

is don't let the salad dressing

dribble down your chin.

Dad, what if

conversation dries up?

What if we just sit there

staring at each other?

What if I float out of my body

and can't get back in?

It's no problem. I left my body

lots of times, always got back.

Have a good time, son.

Yeah, thanks.

Uh, wait a minute, Rick.

Your collar's a little funny.

Pierre's is a very

expensive restaurant.

No, Kate, I have enough money.

Rick, it's a French restaurant.

No one ever has enough money.

Thanks.

Hey, Rick.

Dad, I don't wanna be late.

Restaurant's kind of

expensive, huh?

Wow, thanks.

If you keep this up,

maybe I could take her to

a French restaurant in Paris.

Hi, Dexter. Bye, Dexter.

Hi-- Uh, hi.

Welcome back, Dex.

Hi, Edward.

How was Chicago?

Ah, windy and cold,

but I braved the elements

to buy you this gift.

Well, let me guess. Uh...

Bowling ball.

[DEXTER SCOFFS]

Come on,

you didn't have to do this.

Uh...

Uh...

I don't know what to say,

do you, Edward?

Yeah, but I better

keep my mouth shut.

It was incredible luck.

I just happened by

this old antique shop,

and there he sat in the window,

the faithful custodian

of his patron's fortune.

I thought of us, Edward,

and I wanted you to have it.

How...

nice.

Hold on. Just a minute,

and I'll show you something.

What do you think?

That's one place for it.

I can think of several others.

Wait a minute. What's this?

There's something under here.

This painting

is over another one.

Really? Where?

Uh-huh.

Right here. Look, she's right.

You can just make out

another faint signature.

Oh, no.

What?

Well, I was just reading

about this little old lady

who took this painting

to a dealer to have it cleaned,

and they discovered

another painting under it.

A genuine Rembrandt!

Whoa!

Hold a minute here.

You're not suggesting

we strip the old accountant?

No, of course not.

We know what

that means to you.

But I can't help wondering

what that signature is...

"A-S-S-O."

Maybe it's...

Oh, it couldn't be a Picasso.

Picasso? Strip the sucker.

KATE: Yeah.

I had a great time last night.

Great? Just great?

How about spectacular,

fantastic, fabulous?

Now you're on the right track.

[GIGGLES]

I thought I was pretty clever

to tell the headwaiter

we were newlyweds.

Yeah, but he still made us

wait an hour for a table.

Maybe I should've slipped him

more than a quarter.

I know what I thought was

the best part of the evening.

So do I.

The chocolate éclairs.

Chocolate éclairs?

I even had a dream about them.

[CHUCKLES]

Did a guy in your dream

look like me?

Uh-huh.

Ow!

Oh, no. Matt.

Great.

He doesn't look

too cheerful.

Well, he's still upset

about our breaking up.

I can't blame him.

When you've been to heaven,

it's hard to go back

to Hackensack.

Mandy, can I talk to you?

This isn't the time, okay?

I've gotta go tell Brad

something anyway.

You know, you're really

a terrific guy.

It's a curse.

Why aren't you

sitting with Amanda?

Yeah. Why is she talking

to Matt Henderson?

The guy's in a dumpster.

She's just gonna put the lid on.

Why you sitting like that?

Don't you wanna see this?

No, I don't.

I'm not gonna stare at them

like some petty, jealous kid.

Anyway, I can see them

just fine in the mirror.

So how'd it go last night?

It went.

You know, Rick,

one of the reasons I admire you

is you're not one of those

self-righteous clowns

who thinks

it's some kind of crime

to talk about

the details of a date.

Yeah, you don't have those

sick hang-ups about privacy.

Rick, you have

an awesome responsibility

to share your insights

and provide us

with cheap thrills.

Would you guys relax?

Look, I couldn't

explain it, anyway.

Look who's

walking out alone.

She wants you, Stratton.

You dog!

Isn't life the best?

So, babe,

how's he holding up?

Matt was really upset

about us going out.

He told me he ripped

the door off his locker.

Maybe he just forgot

his combination.

[LAUGHS]

Do you think that's funny?

No.

You shouldn't

make jokes about Matt.

He was emotionally devastated.

You're right. I'm sorry.

Listen, how about going

to the ZZ Top concert next week?

They're your favorite group.

Rick...

this is hard for me to say.

I like you a lot...

but I think I'm gonna

start seeing Matt again.

I'm really sorry.

But I thought--

He said he couldn't

live without me.

And you fell for that?

[CAR HORN HONKING]

That's Matt.

Goodbye, Rick,

And thanks for last night.

[♪♪♪]

[PLAYING FOLK TUNE]

Hey, Rick, how's it going?

My life is trash.

Something happen with Amanda?

Nothing is ever

gonna happen with Amanda.

I thought you two

were getting along so great.

Yeah, we were.

Until her ex-boyfriend

demolished a locker

in her honor.

You mean she's going back

with him.

Yeah, just because he said

he couldn't live without her.

[SCOFFS]

Who can?

Well, I know this doesn't

mean much right now, son,

but there are

other girls out there.

Dad, you're asking me

to go back to Hackensack.

Rick, if this girl

is all that special,

why don't you go after her?

Dad, she doesn't want me.

I'm not good enough for her.

You're not good enough for her?

That's a ridiculous thing

to say.

See? Who wants a guy

who says ridiculous things?

Is this girl important

to you or not?

Dad, you're talking to a guy

who slept

with her dinner napkin.

Why not tell her that?

What?

And have her think

I'm some kind of sicko?

What do you care, if it works?

[SCOFFS]

What if it doesn't work?

Would you feel any worse

than you do now?

No.

What do you got

to lose by trying?

[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]

You know, Dad, you're right.

I'm gonna work hours a day,

seven days a week

to get her back.

And if it doesn't work...

Yeah?

I'm blaming you.

[♪♪♪]

[LINE RINGING]

WOMAN [ON PHONE]:

WZIN. Love line.

I can't believe it.

I finally got through.

So, what song you want, kid?

Uh, I'd like to dedicate

Mr. Mister's "Broken Wings"

from Rick to Amanda

with utter devotion.

Oh, you know how many "utter

devotions" I've done today?

How about "yours forever"?

You don't understand.

I really am utterly devoted.

Okay, okay.

Aren't you supposed to be

studying for exams tomorrow?

Why should I study, Kate?

My life is over.

Can you believe it?

Her line's busy!

It takes me two hours

to get through to the station,

now she's never gonna hear it.

You think maybe you're getting

a little carried away

with Amanda?

A little carried away?

If I could buy advertising

on television, I'd do it.

Look, Rick, I'm all for love,

but there are other things

in life besides Amanda.

No, there aren't.

The phone's ringing!

I got through!

Hello, Amanda.

Turn your radio to WZIN.

Amanda Belson.

Uh...

[SPEAKS IN HALTING SPANISH]

Wrongo número.

Sí, sí, my mistake-o.

[MR. MISTER'S "BROKEN WINGS"

PLAYS ON RADIO]

RADIO DEEJAY:

And now, for somebody

who's disgustingly

utterly devoted,

Mr. Mister's "Broken Wings"

from Rick to Amanda.

♪ Take these broken wings ♪

♪ And learn to fly again

Learn to live so free... ♪

She should've been back

from the dealer an hour ago.

Where is she?

Maybe she sold the painting

and ran off with the money.

Have you thought about

how we'll split it?

I just assumed

it would be - ,

although I was

the one who found it.

That's true.

Although we were the ones

who found the signature.

Well, yes, of course.

But some people might think

that was a technicality.

I mean, I bought it.

You gave it...

as a gift.

Out of friendship.

Well?

What happened?

It's a P. Casso.

Whoa! We did it!

Oh, no!

[BOTH LAUGHING]

Uh, it was put out

by Peter Casso

Paint-by-Numbers Company,

Cicero, Illinois.

We sacrificed

the old accountant for this?

Well, look at it this way,

we haven't lost a painting.

We've gained a hobby. Heh.

Well, I'll go look to see

if we have any brushes.

[SIGHS]

Well, I'm relieved.

Another minute, we would've

been at each other's throats.

[SIGHS]

You're right.

I never knew

you could be so petty.

Dexter, don't!

What is it? What?

Those are for Amanda.

Who's Amanda?

A girl Rick has a crush on.

A crush?

Dad, she's breaking my heart.

I'm sorry.

I didn't know. Here.

Rick can't seem

to get through to her.

I'm not surprised. Listen,

forget about the éclairs.

That's the way

to a man's heart.

The way to a woman's heart

is through her heart.

Send her a poem.

Dex, that went out

about years ago.

Pay him no heed.

Let me tell you something.

A simple, sincere verse,

couched in the language

of the heart,

can get through to any chick.

You really think

a poem will work?

Can you afford a Porsche?

No.

Try the poem.

It's Wednesday.

She's always here by now.

Here you go...

utterly devoted.

Does everyone know?

Next time

you wanna keep a secret,

don't put it on the radio.

I'm gonna

dedicate a song to you:

♪ You don't mess around

With a big man's woman ♪

All right. Wish me luck, guys.

All right, man.

Yeah, thanks.

Go for it, Rick.

She's gonna mangle him.

So what?

We're always getting

m*nled by ugly girls.

Hi.

Hi.

Is it okay if I sit down?

Well...

Thanks.

I just wanted

to give you this.

What is it?

Oh, it's a little something

I've been writing

for the last two days.

I'll take that.

Matt, give it back.

Oh, ha-ha, I will

as soon as I'm finished.

Give it back!

Take it easy.

That's private!

Not for long. May I have

everyone's attention, please?

Stratton here has written a poem

he'd like to share

with all of us.

Come on!

Oh, my darling Amanda

[CROWD LAUGHS]

Eyes of sparkling sapphire

Thick chestnut threads of hair

Be still, my heart!

Just seeing

Your sun-kissed skin

Where, where?

Is more than

My love-drenched heart can bear

I feel faint!

MATT:

But wait, wait, wait.

There's more.

I feel sick!

[ALL LAUGHING]

[IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE]

Farewell, Romeo!

[♪♪♪]

Hey, Rick.

Oh, dinner will be ready

in minutes.

I've given up eating.

Why?

Would you stop

asking all these questions?

This is one I don't

wanna talk about, okay?

Okay.

I mean it, Dad.

What do you think happened?

I don't know,

but I'm gonna find out.

Edward, he said

he wants to be left alone.

He said it.

Doesn't mean he means it.

He'll resent it

if you go up there.

[SIGHS]

You're right.

I should leave him alone.

What's the worst that could

happen if I did go up there?

He'll think you're nosy

and hate you forever.

I can live with that.

[KNOCKS ON DOOR]

Dad, if it's you, I'm not here.

If you don't wanna talk

about this, I understand.

Good.

But, if you do, I'm here.

That bad?

Dad, I don't

wanna talk about it.

Why did you have to

talk me into this, anyway?

You know, I may have

been miserable before,

but at least I had

a shred of my dignity left.

I just wanted you

to believe in yourself

and go after what you wanted.

You also asked me,

"What do you have to lose?"

Well, I found out.

Why do I feel responsible,

and I don't even know

what happened?

I want to go

to another school...

on another planet.

It won't do any good.

There are women everywhere.

One thing I've learned

from all this

is to go after what you want

but hold on to your dignity.

That's something.

Excuse me, Rick?

Amanda's downstairs.

Ow!

She is? Here? Amanda?

You hear that?

Amanda's here! Ow!

What about holding on

to your dignity?

I just can't resist this face!

Ow!

Hi.

I'm glad you stopped by.

Rick, I had to see you.

You did?

No one's ever

written me a poem before.

You liked it?

Well, I only heard four lines,

but they were so romantic

and wise and beautiful.

[STAMMERS]

The rest was just

more of the same.

Come on in.

I can't believe

Matt could be so cruel.

Ah, who cares?

I care.

I told him I didn't want

to see him for a week.

What?

Well, a week's a long time.

You mean you're still

going out with that moron?

What do you see in him?

Well, he's sweet and kind

and good-looking.

And he is the captain

of the football team.

What difference does that make?

I've always dreamed of dating

the captain of

the football team, Rick,

and now I am.

It's my destiny.

Heh. So...

you mean I never

even had a chance, then.

What can I say?

You know,

I've done things for you

I've never even imagined

doing for other girls.

Here, look at this.

This is

tomorrow's éclairs.

Two weeks' allowance! For what?

So I might be given the chance

to humiliate myself

in public again?

Here, you see this?

This was our relationship.

At first, it was incredible.

And now...

it's just glop!

Oh, gross!

[RICK LAUGHING]

What did you do,

strangle a baker?

I kicked the habit, Alfonso.

I'm free of her!

That's the last time

I make a fool of myself

for a girl again.

Don't make any rash statements

until I tell you

what happened at Burgers.

Alfonso, I know

what happened at Burgers.

I mean after you left.

The girls went nuts

over your poem.

They think you're so romantic.

Get out of here.

No! Three of them wanted me

to give you their phone numbers.

Are you serious?

Hey, I'm writing

my own love poem right now.

I'm addressing it

"To Whom It May Concern."

[PHONE RINGING]

Hello.

Yes, this is Rick.

Oh, hi, Laura.

Yeah. Yeah, I guess

I am pretty heartbroken.

Do you know a word

that rhymes with "arteries"?

Tomorrow night?

Yeah, that sounds like fun.

Of course, I think I'm gonna

need a lot of comforting.

[♪♪♪]

[♪♪♪]