04x21 - The Way We Weren't

[bunniefuu]

[RIK HOWARD & BOB WIRTH'S

"TOGETHER" PLAYING]

♪ Here we are, face to face ♪

♪ A couple of silver spoons ♪

♪ Hopin' to find

We're two of a kind ♪

♪ Makin' a go

Makin' it grow ♪

♪ Together ♪

♪ We're gonna find our way ♪

♪ Together ♪

♪ Takin' the time each day ♪

♪ To learn all about

Those things ♪

♪ You just can't buy ♪

♪ Two silver spoons together ♪

♪ You and I together ♪

♪ We're gonna find our way ♪

♪ You and I together ♪

♪ We're gonna find our way ♪

♪ We're gonna find our way ♪

♪ Together ♪

Now a blast from the past,

a golden oldie,

a trip down memory lane

for all you nostalgia freaks,

"Purple Rain" by Prince.

Good job, kid. Now try the FM.

Ahem. This is Rick Stratton

on WYDC . on your FM dial

in the paradise

we like to call Shallow Springs.

Beautiful.

Just beautiful.

Heh! Well, you think

I have a chance?

Why not? You know your music

and you don't talk

through your nose.

Can I ask you something?

If I get the job,

when would I start?

Two weeks.

It'll take me that long

to ease out

my brother-in-law.

Perfect.

I'll be coming back

from a ski trip with my mom.

She's flying in from England.

I made all the arrangements.

That's fascinating, kid.

Well, I'll see you

in two weeks, I hope.

Thanks a lot, Mr. Hersher.

Uh, Phil. Just call me Phil.

And don't thank me yet.

Somebody better

might come along.

[♪♪♪]

Got everything?

Oh, I think so.

Let's see, I've got the, uh...

The brochures,

the contracts, the files.

Called a cab?

Yes, I called a cab.

You're all set.

Where's your luggage?

Oh, I knew

there was something.

Hey, Dad, I think I got the job.

Wow, that's pretty good,

considering

you don't have experience.

It's only a local station and

the listeners are mostly kids.

Yeah, but nevertheless--

And I told him

I'd work for nothing.

Get a lot of work that way.

Oh, the ski lodge called.

They have that suite

you wanted.

That's the last thing

on my list.

Man, don't you love days

when everything goes right?

Well, it certainly

isn't one of mine.

Oh! I'm a nervous wreck.

Come on. You know this deal

backwards and forwards.

But it's the biggest thing

I've done for Eddie Toys.

And the most important too.

Dad says this could

make us or break us.

Maybe you should go.

[DOORBELL RINGS]

I got it.

Mom!

Hello, Richard.

[CLEARS THROAT]

Oh.

Here you go.

By the way, in this country,

red means stop.

You're not supposed

to be here till tomorrow.

Well, I couldn't wait

to see you.

I can take a cab

to my hotel later.

Dad, Kate, look who's here.

Edward.

Evelyn.

Katie.

That's Kate.

Well, excuse me,

I've gotta get

my things together.

Going somewhere?

Yes, I have to go out of town.

What a shame we won't

be able to spend time together.

Yes. I was so looking

forward to it.

You almost ruined

my surprise by coming early.

Look what I bought you.

Ooh! From Bloomingdale's.

How funky.

Well, it's perfectly delightful.

But is it supposed

to be baggy like this?

Or did Kate try it on first?

Oh, Evelyn,

I'm sure that baggy outfit

will fit you like a glove.

Is that so? Well, I think--

Have a seat.

You must be tired

from your long trip.

As a matter of fact, I am.

Maybe I should

check into my hotel now.

I've got a better idea.

We're leaving tomorrow.

Why don't you stay here tonight?

Rick! You know how your mother

prefers to stay at the Plaza.

Yeah, and we wouldn't want her

to go to the trouble

of changing her plans.

Nonsense. I'd love to stay.

Great!

I'll take your bags upstairs.

Are you sure, Evelyn?

It's an hour

to the city from here.

I didn't come to see New York.

I came to spend time

with my son.

Well, make yourself comfortable.

I have to get Kate's bag.

No, you don't, honey.

What?

Uh, well, I wouldn't think

of leaving you alone

with a...guest.

How sweet.

The trip can wait a few days.

It can't wait a few days.

We could lose the account.

The company won't

go out of business.

Kate, could I see you

in the kitchen for a moment?

Of course. Heh.

[CHUCKLES]

Thank you again

for letting me stay.

I got reservations at the lodge

for your favorite suite.

The one we used to go to

when I was a kid.

Suite ,

overlooking that valley.

That wasn't . That was .

Are you sure?

Positive.

Twenty-three is a room

in the east wing.

When the sun comes up,

it floods the room

with sunlight

and ruins your whole day!

I can't believe

you'd call off a deal

you worked on for six months

because of Evelyn.

I don't wanna leave you alone

in the house

with that barracuda.

Barracuda?

Isn't that a little strong?

I was holding back.

I'm not gonna be alone with her.

Rick's gonna be here.

I know, but--

She's only staying one night.

How long do you think she needs?

You know she still

has a thing for you.

Well, I don't have

a thing for her.

Not even a little?

You were married to her.

For seven days.

I thought you said

you were a pushover

for her tight clothes and

that perfume she used to wear.

Evelyn's clothes

did nothing for me.

And her perfume?

That was something else.

Honey, it was a long time ago.

Well, not to her.

I've seen the way

she crinkles her nose

when you make a joke, ha-ha-ha!

And the way

she looks you up and down

like a slab of beef.

She does?

Honey, if you don't want to go,

you don't have to go.

Really?

Really.

You know how important

this contract is to the company.

After working on it

for six months,

if you let this deal fall

through, you'll hate yourself.

I know.

Then you know what to do.

Uh-huh.

Go upstairs and unpack.

You're being ridiculous!

Trouble in paradise?

Trouble? No.

No trouble. Heh-heh.

You want some coffee?

I'd love some.

So how's married life?

Not too bad.

Must have been quite a thrill

to make it

to the second week.

[CHUCKLES]

Well, it's not the same

as when we were married.

It doesn't have

the passion or the drama.

Ours was more of

a short story than a drama.

[CHUCKLES]

Do you remember how we met?

Mm.

We saw each other

in a restaurant.

We kept staring at each other,

hoping our dates

wouldn't get suspicious.

Then you started choking, and I

gave you the Heimlich maneuver.

And you didn't even know

the Heimlich maneuver.

Yeah,

and you weren't even choking.

[BOTH LAUGHING]

Oh...

Yeah.

But it worked.

One week later,

we were married.

Yeah, and one week after that,

we filed for divorce.

But what a week.

Yeah.

[SNIFFING]

Don't tell me

you're still wearing...

Wearing what?

Nothing.

Ah! How sweet. You remembered.

No, I didn't.

Edward...

Guess what!

What?! What, son?

I got the suite.

Suite .

We've got it for days.

That's marvelous, Richard.

Way to go, Rick!

[CHUCKLES]

Am I interrupting anything?

No. No, son. No, not at all.

Your mom and me

just having some coffee. Heh.

I've gotta get upstairs

and help, uh...

Uh...

Kate.

Kate.

Yeah.

If you'll excuse me.

Sure.

We can pick up

where we left off later.

What are you doing?

Oh, I'm going to Chicago.

No! Kate, you can't.

I'm so ashamed.

I behaved like a schoolgirl,

thinking that you and Evelyn

couldn't be left alone.

What, schoolgirl? Come on,

no wife in her right mind

would leave her husband

alone with that barracuda.

It's only natural to be upset.

Oh, I'm not upset anymore.

Besides, Rick will be here.

Yeah, but, Kate--

I spent months on this deal.

I can't just walk away from it.

Why not? Come on!

The company's not gonna

go out of business.

[CAR HORN HONKS]

Oh, that's my cab.

Kate, uh...

I know the next few days

won't be easy,

but try to make

the best of it, all right?

Wish me luck!

[QUIETLY] Uh, good luck.

KATE:

Bye!

Rick! Rick!

Yeah? What is it, Dad?

Ah!

You all set to play Parcheesi?

What?

Parcheesi.

The three of us will play.

What do you say?

You want the truth?

No. Get the game.

[TELEPHONE RINGING]

Parcheesi?

It's great. You'll love it.

You know what I wanna do?

Forget it.

I mean, Rick wants

to play Parcheesi.

You know how he is, he gets

his heart set on something.

I was only going to suggest we

build a fire in the fireplace.

Why?

Well, I think fireplaces

are so romantic.

And it is a bit chilly in here.

I hadn't noticed.

That was the station manager.

He wants me to do a test run.

Tonight?!

Yeah, at : .

Isn't that great?

No, son. you can't.

What's the big deal?

I'll be back in a few hours.

Yeah, but your mom

just got here.

Come on, she came all the way

from England to see you.

Nonsense.

You go right ahead.

But you haven't

seen him in months.

Richard and I will have

days together in Vermont.

And you and I haven't

had any time to visit.

Go ahead, dear.

Thanks.

You guys have a nice time, now.

[EDWARD CLEARS THROAT]

[DOOR CLOSES]

We're not starting a fire.

Anywhere.

[♪♪♪]

[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]

Now, here's your playlist,

your request-line numbers

and your commercials.

I-- I've gotta do commercials?

Who do you think

pays your salary?

I'm not getting any salary.

You sound

like my brother-in-law.

Now, just read the commercial.

"Are you looking

for a change in your life?

For adventure, respect,

a chance to be your own boss?

Then Truck Drivers Institute

is the place for you."

Oh, come on, kid,

put some life into it.

It's a commercial. Sell it!

Sell it? Sell it.

Sell it.

"Are you looking

for a change in your life?

For adventure, respect,

a chance to be your own boss?

Then Truck Drivers Institute

is the place for you!"

Now, that's great.

Read the next one.

"Nobody likes

to talk about death,

but we make it easy for you

at Murphy's Mortuary!"

Beautiful. Just beautiful!

Edward, what are you doing

in the bathroom?

You've been in there

for minutes.

EDWARD:

Who times these things?

[TELEPHONE RINGS]

Hello?

KATE [ON PHONE]: Evelyn?

Kate, how nice

to hear your voice.

You sound in good spirits.

Oh, I am. I feel right at home.

Uh, could I speak

to Edward, please?

I'm afraid

he's not decent right now.

Oh? Why don't you try and

get him to the phone, please.

My plane leaves

in a few minutes.

I'll do my best.

Edward, you have

a phone call.

I'll have to call back.

I'm sorry, Kate.

He doesn't want to talk.

[CHUCKLES]

Are you sure?

Edward, are you sure?

I told you

I didn't want to talk now!

Uh, could I speak

to Rick, please?

Oh, Rick isn't here.

What do you mean,

he's not there?

Well, you know kids.

They don't like to hang around

the house with adults.

Any message?

No. Never mind.

Oh, Edward, it's almost : .

Rick's going to be on soon.

Just in time.

Yeah, I hope

I can find this station.

[ROCK MUSIC PLAYS ON RADIO]

That sounds like it.

Huh.

Can you believe it?

Rick, a disc jockey?

I can still remember

when he was a little boy,

coming home

from m*llitary school.

Me too.

When I first saw him,

I didn't know whether

to hug him or salute him.

RICK:

That was my personal favorite

before new wave

became old wave.

He sounds great!

The request lines are open.

Hello, you're on.

CALLER:

Hey, Ricker, do you know

"Yummy, Yummy, Yummy,

I've Got Love in My Tummy"?

RICK:

Sure! I'm no dummy.

Listen to him!

Shh!

♪ Yummy, yummy, yummy

I got love in my tummy... ♪

You remember this?

Oh, of course.

This was a big hit.

It was more than that.

You made them play it

over and over at our wedding.

I did?

We had such a good time.

We did?

[CLICKS TONGUE]

I was being serious.

I guess we did have

a few outstanding moments.

That's the way

I remember them.

Yeah, well...

Edward, would you mind

if I share something

very personal with you?

You know me.

I'm always ready to talk.

Well, I hope it would

be more than just talk.

Are you thirsty?

My-- My mouth is very dry.

I'm fine.

Oh, well, I think I'll, uh...

I'll be right back.

I'll be here.

Yeah, hello. Uh, may I speak

to Rick Stratton, please?

No, I can't hold on.

This is an emergency.

PHIL [OVER INTERCOM]:

You're doing a great job, kid.

The next caller sounds

pretty desperate.

I'll see what I can do.

[CLEARS THROAT]

Once again,

we're back with the Ricker.

Let's go to

the WYDC request lines, folks.

I'm told the next caller's

got it bad, real bad.

This is Rick. What's your pick?

EDWARD [QUIETLY]:

Hello, Rick--

I'm sorry, sir.

You're gonna have to speak up.

I can't speak up, Rick. It's me.

You have to come home

right away.

Uh, "Come Home Right Away"?

Sir, I-I-I...

Ahem, I don't believe

I know who recorded that.

I'm sorry to bother you

at the station,

but this is really important.

I need you at home.

RICK:

"I Need You at Home."

Great tune. Great tune.

Is that your request, sir?

EDWARD:

This is not a request.

This is an order.

A parental order.

Oh, Dad, it's only you! Oh!

It's my dad,

ladies and gentlemen,

a real music lover.

Well, uh, what did you

want to hear today, Dad?

Am I...on the air?

Yeah, you got it.

[IN DEEP VOICE]

Listen, it's not important.

I'll talk to you later.

No problem, Dad. No problem.

That was cute.

[IN REGULAR VOICE]

You heard me?

All of Long Island heard you.

I don't understand

why you're so nervous.

First, you run away,

and then you--

Where are you going now?

I don't know.

Where are you going?

Home. You're f*ring me, right?

Don't be crazy.

That was very offbeat.

My father calling, telling me

to come home was offbeat?

It's a whole new image

for the station.

A DJ who skis with his mother,

whose father calls

on the radio,

it's healthy, it's wholesome.

It's just crazy enough to work.

You mean...?

Right. You got the job.

All right!

Aah!

There you are.

Where have you been?

You've been gone for an hour.

Has it been that long?

God's sakes.

Yes, and we still have

some unfinished business.

We do?

Yes, we do.

You see, Edward,

right now,

my life is so incomplete.

I'm sorry to hear that, Evelyn.

Don't be. You have it

in your power to change it.

You're the only who can.

Evelyn, this is crazy.

No, I've thought

long and hard about this.

I have never wanted anything

this much in my life.

I want Rick to spend some time

in England this summer.

What?

I know

you've probably made plans

and it's not much notice.

That's all you want,

is for Rick to spend

time with you?

It would mean so much to me.

That's all you want?!

That's all.

Well, sure!

Wow! Why didn't you say so?

It'd be all right

if he spent a couple of weeks.

A couple of weeks?

I was hoping the whole summer.

The whole summer?

Well, you have him all

the rest of the year. Please?

Well...

Okay, I guess

it would be all right.

It's really up to him.

Oh, Edward, thank you.

Oh, we are going to have

such a good time.

We'll go to plays,

we'll visit the Continent.

We'll tour the museums.

Oh, he's gonna love it,

don't you think?

Heh, yeah, well, I suppose.

[CHUCKLES]

Oh, England has

so much to offer.

After finishing

prep school there,

he'll be able to get into

any college he wants.

What did you say?

That... That England

has so much to offer.

No. No, no, no, the other part,

about the prep school.

Well, that's not certain.

I mean, just in case

he falls in love with the place.

You want Rick

to live in England.

Are you thirsty?

My mouth is a little dry.

Aha, so all

those come-ons were a ploy!

What come-ons?

Aw, come on!

You know what come-ons.

Wearing that perfume,

slithering all over the place.

Those weren't come-ons.

It's the way I move.

I don't believe it.

You come into my house,

crinkling your nose,

softening me up

with your cooing,

just so you can

take my son away.

Oh, for heaven's sake,

he's coming over

for a little vacation.

Oh, we'll see about that!

I don't think

there's gonna be any vacation.

You wouldn't do that.

Oh, wouldn't I?

You're not being fair to Rick!

Oh, who's being fair to him,

tricking him into

living over there?

EVELYN:

I'm not tricking him

into anything.

I will gladly

leave it up to him.

EDWARD:

Oh, great. That's fantastic.

Force the kid to choose

between his mother

and his father.

Mom, Dad, I'm home!

Hey, I got the job.

Hey, that's great, son.

That's wonderful, Richard.

Boy, I am a lucky guy.

Lucky?

Yeah, sure.

I live in a great house

with my dad,

have lots of friends nearby...

then I get to go ski

with Mom on vacations

and now I'm a disc jockey,

playing my own music.

Who could be luckier?

You are a lucky guy.

Your mom just invited you

to England for this summer.

Well, that's great!

Well, it's just for a few weeks.

I know you want

to spend most of your time

back here with your friends.

[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]

Like I said,

I'm one lucky guy.

And we're two lucky parents.

Well, I'm gonna go upstairs

and get ready for tomorrow.

[SIGHS]

Pretty good kid, huh?

I guess we did one thing right.

I don't know. I think maybe

he did it all by himself.

[BOTH CHUCKLING]

Okay. that's it.

Kate, what are you doing here?

If you think I'm going to go

to Chicago and leave you alone--

Kate, what are you doing here?

Uh...

Like I was saying,

if you think

I'm gonna go to Chicago

and leave Evelyn

my favorite scarf, ha!

[♪♪♪]

[♪♪♪]