01x06 - The Ultimate Hang

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Scare PewDiePie". Aired: February 10 – April 6, 2016.*
PewDiePie encounters terrifying situations and sets inspired by his favorite survival horror video games he previously played on his YouTube channel. (Thanks for the shout-out PewDiePie! We appreciate it!! :))
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01x06 - The Ultimate Hang

Post by bunniefuu »

- [screams]

[speaking Swedish]
I'm not having this!


How's it going, bros?
It's PewDiePie.

You're about to watch me get the
absolute sh*t scared out of me.

Oh, my God!

What the sh*t?

I can't run any more!

This show takes
what I already do,

getting scared of horror games,

but taking it
to the next level.


Ah!
A really f*cked-up level.

I'm gonna throw up.

Don't engage with the chicken!

So if you love watching me
get scared shitless...


Okay!

You're gonna love
"Scare PewDiePie."

[scary music]

♪ ♪

[hip-hop music]

- Hey!
- Hey.

- Come on out!
- I'm coming.

♪ ♪

- Uh-oh.
- [laughs] What?

- Still broken.
[laughter]

- Oh, sh*t.
Oh, sh*t.

- Let's just go around.
- Yeah.

- Ah!
Hey, I got you.

Hey!

What's up, bros?
It's PewDiePie.

- Um, let's go.

- Let's go.

We're in a hurry.
[laughs]

- All right, we're going
to an arcade game.

- Yes!
Finally!

- When I say "arcade," what does
that make you think of?

- "Pac-Man."

- Okay.

- Video games.

- Oh!
What else?

- Um, quarters,

flashing lights,
blinking sounds, joysticks,

"Pac-Man," buttons,

bit music, retro.

- What game does that
make you think of?

- "Pac-Man."

- All right, we're here
at the arcade.


- Cool.

- I have something for you
for the arcade.

[jazzy music]

Okay, why don't you
put that on?

Can you see anything?

- No.
- All right.

[upbeat music]

- Do I look cool?
- Mm-hmm, come this way.

Careful, you're gonna
enter something:

a different texture
on the ground.

It's carpet now.
- Oh, great, thanks.

- Okay, come here.

I want you to feel
all these video games.

- Ah, these games.

Is this a game?
Is that really a game?

- Yeah, there's buttons
and everything.

I wouldn't lie to you.

- That's unhygienic.
Why would I kiss that?

That's disgusting.
- You're fine.

Sit in this--sit down.

Sit down.
Go for it.

Okay.
Don't move.

Okay?

Perfect, perfect, perfect,
perfect, okay.

Your job right now
is to stay still, okay?

- Okay.
- Good luck.

- Thank you!

[sinister music]

- Hello?
- Hello?

- Hello, Felix.
- Hello?

- Do you hear me, Mr. Pie?

- Yes.

- Welcome.

Would you like to see
where you are?


- Yes.

- All right, carefully
remove your googles.


♪ ♪

- What the f*ck?

Wha--
[laughs]

What the hell?

Ah, sh*t.

What the f*ck?
[laughs]

Oh, my God!

Okay.
Who do we have here?

- Hey!
- Hey!

How did you get here?
- I-I don't know.

- Well, I feel good
that you're here, actually.

- I try to be an expert on

what it appears to be like
what we're playing.

- Yeah, you should be
the expert, yes!

- So we should be good.
- Okay.

- This is so wild.

- Who is this gentleman?

Oh, hey!
[laughter]

- Hey, buddy!

- Yes!
- What's up, buddy?

- We got this.
- How you doing?

- We're here together, guys.
We can do this.

- So, so what--what is it?

- I don't know.
They don't tell me sh*t.

- All they said is that we're
playing games together.

- Yeah.
- So you guys literally

don't know anything?
- No clue.

- Hold on, I want to--I want to
hit the door button.

- Did you guys know each other
were gonna be here?

- I mean, I know Arin--
- Oh, sh*t.

- Oh!
Don't waste the energy!

What are you doing?
Click again!

- Okay.
- Open it.

- Welcome to the
Wacky Wizard Arcade.


- Okay, thank you.
- Oh, sh*t, okay.

- Thanks for taking
the night shift.


Most people won't since they
think the place is cursed,


but that's just a rumor.

- Is that--
- Okay, hold on. I got it.

- Those animatronics
may look cute,


but if they get too close,

they will take
a bite out of you.


[laughter]

- They look pretty
harmless to me.

- They look--I want to hug them.
- Right? They look kind of cute.

- The security booth has a door
that can be shut,


but shutting the door
drains the battery.


- Thanks.
- Way to blow it already!

[laughter]
- Sorry.

- So scroll through your
security cameras.


- Okay, we are.
- All right.

- Keep an eye on
your animatronics.


- Yes.

- And we'll be by
to get you at : a.m.


- : a.m.?
What time is it now?

- Are you joking?
- Call me if you need whatever.


- What?

- Um, oh, my God.
They're not moving so far.

- Wait, wait, okay, so,

three was the, like,
roller coaster?

both: Yes.

- Five cams.
- So, we're on two.

- Okay.
- This is four.

- Oh, my God.
- I don't f*cking know.

- What is that?
- Wait! Wait!

There's something mov--
- Ah! It's moving!

- Oh, God, oh, God!
- What are you doing?

Calm down!
- He's going!

- Oh, sh*t!
sh*t, sh*t, sh*t!

- Um, f*ck!
What was that, four?

- sh*t, I don't know!

- Wait, where are we?
- I don't know!

- Wait, wait, wait, wait.
- Calm down!

- Okay.
- We had strategy until--

- I'm assuming we're
in the manager's office--

- It's moving, it's moving!
- Okay, wait.

We're so close.
Okay, so four--

- Oh, wait, so this is four.
- No, I'm not seeing--

- You guys are my human shield.

- Yeah, we got you, we got you.

There's the prize corner.

- I don't like
this f*cking sh*t.

[thud]
What was that?

I swear to God I--

- Hold up, dude!
The f*cking bunny is out too!

- I want to hit the door button.
- Is that what that is?

- No, it's a bull--bulldog.
[dog barks]

How--how many were there?
- Three.

- No, there was a drummer too.

- Oh, sh*t, you're right,
the chicken.

- Chica, a kangaroo, a rabbit.

- Wait, wait, we need
to know where he is.

- Oh, okay, okay!
- He's leaving, he's leaving.

- Now it's safe!
I'm sure.

- Okay, okay.
- All right.

- What?
They're both out!

God damn it! What do
we do? - Uh, sh*t,
sh*t.

- Wait, no, we got to
figure out how to work it.

- Okay, we need to know
where we are.

- Okay, so that's the prizes.
- Where are we?

- Pretty sure
we're in the manager's office

because that's the only one
with an arrow.

- Oh, you're right.
- I mean, that would make sense.

- Oh, there it is!
- There he is!

- Oh, he's over there.

- Great, where are
the other ones?

- We should check one.

- Are they all out?
Oh, they're all out.

- Ah, Jesus!
- Oh!

- Ah, I'm so on edge!

[laughter]

We're pretty safe right now.
- Deep, deep breaths.

- Okay.
- We can do this.

- Oh, look.

Do you see that?
- I want to hit the door button.

I mean, I don't see that.
- Oh, my God.

What the f*ck?
How do you not see?

- No, I think I see one.
- Check our door again.

- Okay.
- Check f*cking--

- I think we're--
- Yes, feel free to open it.

- Are you sure
he's not in there?

- No, it's fine!

- [cackling]

- Oh, close it!
Close the door!

[laughing and screaming]
Jesus Christ!

How does it work?

Dude, what the f*ck?
[alarm drumming]

- No, that's a stuffed
animal. - What did the
door do?

Why are they blinking?

- Oh, your batteries are dead.
- Oh, come on!

- What?

- We only shut the door,
like, twice!

- Are you kidding me?

- Yeah, we're gonna
need a volunteer.


- I got it!
I volunteer!

I volunteer as tribute.
- As tribute?

- Yeah, right!
- Okay, great.

- So, there's a reserve battery

somewhere in the arcade.
I don't know where.


If you can find it and bring it
back to the manager's office,


that'll restore your energy.

- All right, I got this.
- Testing one, two, three.

Hello, hello?
- Oh, yeah, I got you, got you.

- Hello, walkie-talkie.
- Okay, I got you, I got you.

- Hello?

- Okay, we're keeping you
a lookout.

- Okay, it's clear, ready?
Okay, here we go.

- Hello?
Oh, there he is, look!

- I don't think
your volume's on.

- Hey, watch out, dude!

Check to your right!
- What?

- [cackling]
- Oh!

You guys, slacking off
the on the job.

- Oh, sh*t, dude, I'm sorry.
- There was a bunny right there.

- You're fine!
Okay, you're fine.

- Okay, I'm not seeing anyone.

I'm gonna sprint into
the main arcade area.

- Main arcade, f*ck.
- Where is it? Where is he?

- I'm at the prize counter.

- Yeah, we see.
[laughs]


- Where are they?
There's four of them!

Where are they?
- sh**t, sh**t, sh**t, sh**t!

- Kangaroo in the distance!

- I'm--I see a chicken.
I see a chicken.

- Don't engage with the chicken!

Oh, sh*t, there's the chicken!

- Where are you right now?
- He's so f*cked.

Uh, we should just
close the doors.

- I'm hiding under
the air hockey table.

- [laughs]

- Is the coast clear?

- Wait.
- Hold on, hold on.

What the f*ck is that?

- Is that the battery?
- Is that it?

- Oh, oh, that might be battery!

Okay, you need to go
to Wizard Wild Ride.

Do you see the roller coaster
spin-y thing?


- Yeah, I see the roller coaster
spin-y thing.

- Walk towards it.
Oh...

Oh, f--oh, sh*t.
- There's a bunny.

- [cackling]
- Oh, God, oh.

- [deep laughter]

- Oh, sh*t, oh, sh*t!
- Oh, sh*t!


- Is that the f*cking bunny?

Uh, he's near us,
but he's walking away.


- This is so--
- Oh, my God, dude.

- They're everywhere!
- There's the bunny.

Okay, over and out,
there's the bunny.

- They're in the claw machine.

- Okay, they're all right next
to the claw machine.


- Claw machine?
Okay.

I'm making my way
to the spin-y thing.

- The Wizard Wild Ride, yes.

- I'm not seeing anybody.
I'm not seeing anybody.


- We don't see you.
Where the hell are you?

- In the middle of the arcade.

I'm approaching
the spin-y thing.


- We see you.
Do you see the battery?

- You see it?
It's right in front of you!

- Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Yes!

- Oh.
Okay.

Okay, you got it.
- I got it?


I got it.
- Yes, that's it.

- Lot of numbers
and stuff on it.


- Well, f*cking get--

- Just sprint!

- Uh, what--where do I
take this thing?


- [deep laughter]

[screaming and laughing]

- Oh, sh*t!
What the f*ck?

Mat, are you there?
We need the battery!

- Ah, sh*t, looks like
that curse lives after all.


- The curse lives?

- They say there's only one way
to defeat the curse.


There are these two tokens
in the arcade.


PewDiePie should probably be
the one to locate the tokens.


Arin, you can direct him
using the cameras.


So if you find the tokens,
bring them


to the Wizard's Wild Ride.
- I don't like the rules.

- You will get to play
one arcade game


to remove the curse.

So do good.

- Hey, if you k*ll PewDiePie,
that's not good.

- Be safe.
- Okay.

Okay, keep me safe.
- Don't worry.


Hold on, let me get to five
and make sure you're safe.


Okay, it looks like
the coast is clear.


[mechanical whirring]

- [cackling]

- [speaking Swedish]
Okay, all right!

Ah, Jesus!
f*ck this place!

f*ck this place, Arin!

- I'm thinking--oh, my God,
the chicken!

- Where's the chicken?
Where's the chicken?

[mechanical whirring]

[whispering]
Arin!

Oh, shi--
- Where are you right now?


- f*ck me in the...

Okay, wait.

I'm at the stage.

What do I do?
Where's the tokens?

- I'm looking, dude!

- Give me some hints.

- Okay, I think I know
where the first token is.


It's near the prize corner,
but there's like a million


f*cking dudes there.

Where are you, dude?

- Okay, I'm at the prize.
I'm at the prize place.

- Okay.
I think it's on the--


I think it's on the door.

Is that what that is?

[beeping]

[retro video game chime]

- Holy sh*t, yes,
I think I got it.

- Oh, the chicken's coming by!
Duck!


- Is this it?
Oh!

[mechanical whirring]

- Wait.
- Ah, Jesus!

f*ck this!

Where do I go?
- Just stay down.


He's walking--he's pacing.

All right, the chicken's
walking away.


- You're doing a great job.
I'm proud of you.

- Dude, do you know where
the--the claw machine?


- Yes.

- It looks like it's
around the neck


of one of the prizes in there.

- So I have to win
one of the prizes?

Okay, I see it.

- I'm watching you,
don't worry.


- Okay, okay, thank you.

- The dog is walking by.
[dog barks]

And it looks like
he's walking away now.


Okay, you're clear.

Book it to the claw machine.

Don't st--what are you doing?

- Don't worry about it.
- That is such a dead giveaway!


- They--if I blend in,
they won't find me.

- That is a great idea.
- [chuckles]

- That's why you're the master.

- What the f*ck happened to Mat?

- The coast is clear, dude.
They're gonna come back.


- Oh, sh*t.
Why didn't you say so?

Okay, all right.

[gasps]
No! Where?

- You can--I think--I think
there's a door, right?


Like, right to your--
to your right?


It looks like there's a handle.

- A door?

Oh, sh*t, you're right.

Oh, what?
Oh, sh*t.

- It's--it's around the neck
of, I think, the ted--teddy--


I can't really
see it that well.


- Oh, sh*t, you're right!

- Watch out!
There's a kangaroo coming.


- Nice one.
- There's a f*cking kangaroo!


- Oh, f*ck!
- Right?


[mechanical whirring]

- Help me.

[laughs]
What the f*ck?

Damn it.

Help me.

♪ ♪

- He's walking away.

- [exhales]
Oh, my God.

All right.
- It looks like you're clear.


- I think the hat helped.
- I think so too.


- Oh, what the f*ck?
What the sh*t?

Okay!
[speaking Swedish]

What the freak is this?
[speaking Swedish]

-Get out of there, dude!

I'm trying to get the token!

Just give me--give me--
[laughs]

[retro video game chime]

Yes!
Ah!

- Felix, you got to
get out of there.


There's more guys coming!

- Ah!
sh*t!

- Okay.
- Where do I go? Where do I go?

- You got to get
to the Wizard, dude.


- That's right.

Oh, sh*t!
What the f*ck?

- You got--you got to get
to the Wizard, dude!


There's guys coming,
and I can't close the door!


- Where is the Wizard?

I can't run anymore!

Ah! Ah!
Okay, okay, all right.

- Are you there?

- [panting]
Okay.

- Dude, like--oh, my God!
[banging, clattering]


What the f*ck?
- Arin!

Arin, are you there?

Is this where I put the tokens?

[retro video game chiming]
Okay.

Oh, Jesus, f*cking--no!
Oh!

[dog barking]
Ah!

What the f*ck?
[panting]

- This is the game that you can
play to remove the curse.


- What?
Ah, hey!

- As the ride spins,
all you got to do is just


put a ball through that
glowing hoop; that's it.


- The glowing what?
The glowing--oh, that thing?

I got this!
Damn it!

It's so fast!
Jesus!

[screaming]

God damn it!

Oh, sh*t!
Okay.

Ow!

Ah!
No!

I need to lift the curse!

- [cackling]

- Are you kidding me?

[panting]

I'm gonna throw up.
Okay.

Why is this stopping?
Did I fail?

Stop.
Not backwards, not backwards.

[sinister techno music]

No, not the music!
I'm so bad!

Timmy!
Timmy!

Give me Timmy!
Give me Timmy.

Ah, yes!
Timmy, you look--you're fixed!

"Pewd, you suck at throwing!"
Yes, I know, Timmy!

Yes, I know!

God damn it!

[alarm blaring]

What is that sound?
What is going--

- I need everybody out.

Everybody, that's an alarm,
that's not us.


- Hey, hey, hey, hey!

- There's a fire.
There's a fire.

There's a fire.

Felix, let's go.
There's a fire.

- Are you serious?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

- Oh, I had two more balls!
- Come on, hurry up!

Hurry up!
- Okay, okay, okay.

- Come on.
Can you hop this?

Hurry up, hurry up, hurry up.

All right, just go, go.
- Okay, okay.

- We still got to get out
of here, okay?

Hurry up.
- Okay.

- There's a fire.
All right.

- [belches]

Oh, that ride
f*cking sucked, man.

- All right, everyone out?

Go, guys, there's a fire!
- What?

- We're gonna go out
the other way.

Go this way, go this way.
- Okay, okay.

- Let's go!

Right here, right there.
Through here, through here!

Through here, yeah.
- Okay. Oh!

What the f*ck?

What happened?

What did they do?

- It's okay, I'm sorry,
we couldn't--[laughs].

The fire--the fire alarm--
we f*cked the whole thing up.

- What happened?
Why did you--did you do that?

Oh, sh*t!
- [coughs]

- Uh, stunts!
Stunts!

Hey, hey, hey!
- Oh, what the f*ck?

- Bring him down!
Bring him down!

Bring him down!

Get some help!
I need some help!

- f*ck, dude!
- Bring him down!

- David!
- [chokes and gasps]

- Help me!

- Get a ladder!
Get a ladder!

- Jesus Christ!
- Get a ladder!

- Jesus Christ.

- Come on!
- Slippery-ass sh*t!

Okay, okay, you're good.
Get on the ladder.

Dude, what the f*ck?

- You okay?
Can you breathe?

- [chuckles]
Can I please get down?

- Can we take the thing off him?

- Okay, I can't let go of you.

- Guys!
- Mat!

- Guys, what's--what's going on?

What happened to your eye?

- Well, dude, it was supposed
to be a gag.

- Wait.
Are you kidding me?

- I don't know
what the f*ck happened.

- Don't worry about it.
- God.

- That's not cool, guys.
- I just want to get down.

- I couldn't tell
if it was real or not.

I was like,
"What the f*ck is going on?"

- You okay, Arin?

- Yeah.
- You can breathe fine?

- You know why?
Because you and I,

we're both in on it.

- That's right!
[laughter]

- Oh, no!
- [screams]

- Timmy!

[somber piano music]

♪ ♪

[laughter]
- Oh, no!

Timmy!
- f*cking hell.

Why is there no medic?

[sinister music]

♪ ♪

[upbeat music]

- This was pretty cool.
I really liked this one.

- Here, do you want--
do you want my eye?

- Oh, nice!
Thank you very much.

Oh!
Dude, that's gross!

Ew!
- Oh, that is gross!

It's all sticky too.
God.

- This one was really freaky
to run out.

- Why?

- Well, they were everywhere.
I didn't know what the f*ck--

I could get tackled, obviously.
- It's true.

You could get tackled
by a furry.

- By a furry.
That's pretty bad.

But, uh, we made it through.
- We did.

- Good job on the battery,
by the way.

- Thank you, thank you!
Thanks for leading me there.

- Hey, I was ready.
I was like--

oh, f*ck!

You are the worst!
That guy is the worst.

[somber piano music]

♪ ♪

- Follow my voice.
You can let go of that thing.

Follow my voice.
Follow my voice.

[claps]
- Damn it!

f*ck you.
All right, I'm going.

- [laughs] This way.
- No.

- It's this way.

Don't worry.
- [screams]

- [laughs]
- Your scream is weird.
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