01x25 - The One with the Text Message

[bunniefuu]

What about this one?

Too poofy.

Ooh, how about that?

That is hot.

You could totally carry that

off.

Still looking for new styles

for the dance tomorrow night?

Why don't you just wear

something you already have?

Yeah right.

This is our first homecoming

dance.

We've been saving our

paycheques for a month.

It's a major milestone in a

girls life.

Is this major for dudes too?

No.

Cool.

I don't know why you're going

with those guys anyway.

Jerry and Pete are wimps.

They are not.

They're athletes.

Tennis isn't a sport.

And what qualifies as a

sport?

You have to be able to knock

someone else down.

Tennis players have amazing

bodies.

Wimps.

Okay, I'm ending this

conversation now.

Well, I'm flying solo.

You are?

Why?

I just feel that I should be

focussing all of my energy on my

skating at this particular time.

Starr hasn't taken you back

after that barfing incident?

Not yet.

Well I don't care what you

think.

Jerry is hot and I can't wait!

[Squealing]

♪

♪ Life begins after school

♪ That's when we bend

all the rules ♪

♪ Time to hang

with all my friends ♪

♪ We like to be together

in a place where we belong ♪

♪ I'm sixteen

♪ Starting to find my way

♪ Got a new job

♪ Gonna start at

the mall today ♪

♪ Thank God I'm on my own

for the first time ♪

♪ I'm sixteen

♪ Life is sweet

♪ When you're growing up

so fast ♪

♪ You got to make the good

times last ♪

♪

♪ I'm sixteen, sixteen

♪ Got to make the good times

last ♪

So who's your date for the

dance?

I'm still waiting for that

world famous supermodel to call

me back.

But if she doesn't, Nikki and I

will probably kick it together.

And Wyatt and Serena are

going.

You know it.

It's the first time I'm going to

a high school dance with a

girlfriend.

Check it out.

It's our two and a half month

anniversary today.

Awww, Wyatt.

CAITLIN: That's so sweet.

Two and a half month

anniversary?

What is that?

You gotta get a girl a

present for half a month?

No you don't have to.

I just, I don't know, wanted to.

[Sighing]

Maybe if you're lucky, your

wimpy dates will bring you

presents.

Hey!

[Gasping]

[Laughing]

Serena, Charmaine, what's up?

Nice going.

You just hit my girlfriend's

friend with a fry.

If she had better reflexes it

could have been a snack.

Right.

Thanks for the tip.

What's happening?

Rumour has it my parents are

in the mall today.

I told them I'd be at the

library today studying.

But it's a P.D. day.

P.D.

Party dudes.

We're not supposed to be

studying.

Tell that to Mr. and Mrs.

everyone in our family gets

straight A's.

If they catch me they'll ground

me.

Then you won't be able to go

to the dance.

Jude, I need you to run

interference.

You're good at distracting

people.

It's my good looks.

What are they wearing?

Probably something from .

Right, I'm on it.

And remember on the Eiffel

Tower.

That hat he was wearing.

Oh, so bad.

Mad ugly chapeau garcon.

WYATT: Hey, Serena.

Can I talk to you?

I've got some work to do

anyway.

Catch you later.

What's up?

I was going to give this to

you tomorrow but since today's

our actual anniversary, here.

Wow, Wyatt, it's really

beautiful.

I didn't get you anything.

That's cool.

I'm just glad you like it.

Want me to help you put it on?

Actually I think I'll save

it.

It's too special just to wear to

work.

That's cool.

Hey, do you want to meet me at

the food court at lunch?

Oh, okay, sure.

Cool, maybe you can get to

know the g*ng before the dance.

See ya.

See ya.

So I already blew half my

budget on these strappy shoes.

They're three inches high.

Can you walk in them?

Shoes that are made for

walking are never the cute

shoes.

Ooh, pit stop, come on.

Huh?

Step right up, we've got

fancy pants butternut squash,

this brown mushroom one and an

old school chicken noodle that's

not half bad.

And I thought my hat was

ugly.

I heard that.

The mushroom one is the best.

I'm allergic to mushrooms.

What happens if you eat them?

You wouldn't die or anything

would you?

I just get a huge stomach

ache.

Last time I ate something with

mushrooms in the sauce I was in

the "El Sporto" washroom for

four hours.

Ew.

Ew.

Back it up, stinky.

You're scaring away the

customers.

So we've got all day to find

the perfect dress.

Where can we start?

Oh my gosh.

Oof!

I was born to wear this

dress.

It's called the Look At Me

dress because everyone will look

at you when you wear it.

It's so pretty.

Do you have it in any other

colours?

Oh no, this is the last one

in the whole store.

You did see it first.

Oh, go for it.

[Squealing]

Thanks, Jen.

Oh it's such a great dress.

Thanks.

We'll find you your dream dress

too.

Don't worry.

[Screaming]

Oh no, I can't afford this.

I've already bought those shoes.

I guess nobody will be

looking at you.

Come again when you have

more money.

Have a khaki day.

Hmm.

Okay, this guy at soup

village says it's impossible to

eat crackers in one minute

without a drink.

A buck says neither of you can

do it.

You're on.

Hey guys.

What are you doing?

Stuffing our faces.

It was a dare.

Nothing.

Want to join us?

You can help us with our

little experiment we're doing.

I told you dude it's impossible.

You guys owe me a buck.

I'll catch you later, Wyatt.

Okay, I look so hot in this.

I thought you couldn't afford

it?

No, Caitlin couldn't afford

it.

Don't tell her I bought it

though.

You do realize you're going

to the same dance.

Yes, but once she finds her

new perfect dress she'll forget

all about this one.

[Gasping]

Uh oh.

Jen, what are you doing in my

new dress?

Good plan.

Nothing.

What are you doing here?

I decided I really wanted the

dress so I returned my new

shoes.

Too late, she's buying it.

Okay, calm down.

It's not really your dress,

Caitlin.

I am calm and yes it is,

dress stealer.

[Gasping]

I don't see your name on it.

But I saw it first.

That's like totally against girl

rules.

The I saw it first rule

doesn't count if you can't buy

it.

Right Nikki?

Oh no, I'm not getting

dragged in to this.

I'm going for lunch.

I agree with her.

But it's my look at me dress.

Yeah you can't do that to

someone.

Ring ring, wake up call.

It can't be her dress if she's

buying it.

Hmm.

Thank you.

That's it.

We are so not going to the dance

together.

JEN: Fine.

Fine.

Fine.

Once I ate so much chocolate

I started to shake.

Ah, yet another stimulating

conversation.

[Screaming]

Hello, anyone home?

Quick, do something.

Okay.

Fire!

Quick, evacuate the mall.

Now.

Don't just stand there.

Run, save yourselves.

Oh, that was so embarrassing.

Did you see those outfits?

They had those before I was

born.

[Laughing]

They were pretty stylish.

They won't be bothering you

for a little while.

[Phone ringing]

Aww, love birds exchanging

poems over their phones now?

Let me guess, it says I love

you my little "Wyattkins."

No.

[Gibberish]

I don't get it.

I think she just dumped me.

On a text message.

No way.

She broke up with you on a

text message?

What was she thinking?

Even I'd never do that.

That's "harshing" my mellow,

dude.

It's not you, it's me.

Yeah right.

Hate to break it to you dude but

it's definitely you.

Okay, you can not believe

what Jen just did to me.

Can it top Serena dumping

Wyatt in a text message?

[Gasping]

You poor thing.

Why is everyone just sitting

around?

He needs tissues, sad music and

chocolate fudge sundaes stat.

I'm on the ice cream.

I'll grab the tissues.

Here I have some really sad

Sarah McLaughlin pre programmed

for the first day after breakup.

And some Alanis Morissette for

later when you hit your angry

phase.

No thanks.

I think I know best, Wyatt.

I've been dumped more than

anyone.

No, chick music.

Jonesy.

I'll tell you what he needs.

A new, hotter girlfriend.

And I'm gonna find him one for

you.

Come on, I've got a great gig

for meeting chicks.

You can't skip the ice cream

stage.

Come back.

They never listen.

[Gasping]

My dress.

I've got to get shopping.

Okay, I'll be your wingman.

Just try to look cool.

[Groaning]

Okay.

Maybe you need more of a pilot.

I'll flirt on your behalf.

Look alive.

Incoming hotties.

Hey there, looking for a date?

Yeah right.

Nice hat.

Oh it's not for me.

It's for my friend here.

He doesn't look very fun.

Dude, I can't help you here

if you don't want to help

yourself.

Those were grade A hotties.

It's Serena.

Dude, you've got to show her

that you're back on the market.

Hey, Wyatt.

[Groaning]

Okay then.

Pathetic.

Jen, I think I should just

re-remind you that I saw it

first.

I already bought it.

Remember?

That's why you should take it

back and let me buy it.

It's only fair.

Caitlin, forget it.

There are hundreds of dresses in

this mall.

But I've been looking all day

and I haven't found anything I

like.

It's my dream dress.

Please.

Hmm.

You just don't want to give

it to me because you know I look

cuter in it than you do.

Oh that's it.

You can follow me around all day

but I suggest you spend your

energy shopping for a new dress

instead.

Because I am not giving you

mine.

Fine I will.

Fine, go then.

I am.

Ah, nuts.

Jude, I need you now.

Isle three just outside the

barn.

JUDE: Be right there.

Mr. and Mrs. Wong?

Remember me?

I'm the kid that peed in Nikki's

Mr. Fishy pool.

Have you seen the sick

underwater exhibit here?

They let you feed fish heads to

the sharks.

[Beeping]

Excuse me.

Yo.

Good work.

There's a "giganto: sized

popcorn in this for you if you

keep them busy for a few more

hours.

Nice, I'm in.

NIKKI: Hey Wyatt, what's up?

Oh, what am I going to do?

The first thing you need is

answers.

You can't get closure without

answers.

Like how could she do it on text

messaging.

You got dumped on text

messaging?

That is so cold.

So are you ready to confront

her?

I think so.

I just need to know.

Then let's do it.

[Sighing]

What's the matter, dude-ette?

I have nothing to wear to the

dance.

Bummer.

Maybe a taste of my newest

creation will cheer you up?

Mushroom pizza stick-its?

Mmm, this is actually really

good.

It's the ground up mushrooms

that give it it's delicious

fungus-y flavour.

Kind of like feet.

I wouldn't use that in your

ads.

Where are Nikki's parents?

Feeding sharks.

I thought I'd introduce them to

a little culture.

That looks so good.

I'm starving.

Yeah, taking other people's

dresses really works up an

appetite.

Hmm.

What's going on?

Why don't you ask Jen?

Hey Jen, stolen anyone else's

dress lately?

Okay, you need to get a grip

on reality here.

It's just a dress.

Yeah, my dress.

Okay look, I'll help you find

another one.

How's that?

Wait, Jen.

What?

sLast time I ate mushrooms I wa

rin the "El Sporto" washroom fo

four hours.

Oh nothing.

Mmm, Jude, this is the best

stick-it I've ever tasted.

I know, so good.

The mushroom pizza stick-it

is a triumph.

I am so good at this.

Yeah it will be a real hit.

Oh what did I do?

These weasels are awesome.

I told you.

Oh I know, let's shop where

Nikki shops and get some hip new

threads.

JUDE: Okay, Nikki's parents.

We will shop at The Khaki Barn.

[Gasping]

What are you doing in here?

They said they wanted to shop

where you shop.

I don't shop here.

Check out the fresh vintage.

This is so me in years.

Get them out of here.

Do you want to look boring

like everyone else?

Or would you rather I put you in

some sick threads and make you

look cool like me?

Like you, dude.

Do you want me to go with

you?

I could hurt her for you.

I learned this really good shin

kick.

I need to do this on my own.

Okay well I'll be here if you

need me.

Hey.

Hey.

So I just wanted to know,

why'd you break up with me?

Well the thing is, I think

I'm getting back together with

Chad.

Chad?

It just kind of happened on

our senior trip to Paris.

You dumped Wyatt for Chad?

Wyatt's one of the nicest guys

in the world.

And how could you break up with

someone on text messaging?

Ouch, that's how you did it

babe?

Sorry dude, that's cold.

Ahem.

I'll just be back here.

I mean he's cool but the

guy's practically in a coma.

[Thudding]

Ouch.

It's a maturity thing.

He's just kind of cool about the

things I need him to be cool

about.

Name one time I haven't been

mature.

How about when you pretended

to like all those grown-up

things so I'd like you.

Well, okay there was that

time.

Oh and there's also the time

you started tripping because I

was wearing that stupid old

bandanna.

And then there was that other

time...

Okay okay I get the point.

I was going to tell you but

when you gave me that present I

just couldn't do it to your

face.

I'm sorry I hurt you, Wyatt.

You can have your bracelet back.

No, you keep it.

I got it for you.

That's it?

You're just going to walk away?

Oh I get it, you're planning

revenge.

I can be really useful in that

regard.

That's okay.

She's right.

I wasn't mature enough for her.

But one day I will be and it'll

be her loss.

You know when all the girls

realize that bad boys aren't

where it's at they'll be

fighting over you, right?

When's that happen?

I think around age .

See, I told you that's what

you needed.

You just weren't ready yet.

Don't give up yet, buddy, I'm

going to find you a hot chick by

tomorrow night if it kills me.

And I finally found a dress.

So if Jonesy scares all the

girls away you can come with us.

How's he doing?

He'll survive.

Did you find a dress?

Yeah.

It's not as special as yours or

anything but...

Good, 'cause I was thinking

that maybe you should get to

wear the dress after all.

I'll wear yours.

You will?

Yeah, it means more to you

anyway and you did kind of see

it first.

Oh, thank you, thank you,

thank you.

You're the best.

There you are.

Okay, we've decided you have to

go with us to the dance

tomorrow.

We'll all be matching.

That's the look at me dress.

You all have one?

Duh, employee discount.

We bought them the day they came

in.

They are so fetch.

We're doing a dress rehearsal

tonight.

Want to see our routine?

Five, six, seven, eight.

Whoa.

♪

Yes!

That was kickin'.

We're so hot.

See you at the dance

tomorrow.

Dress buddy.

What?

I told you it's yours.

I can't wear it now.

People will think I'm with them.

Well I don't want it.

Oh man, the stores are closing.

I won't even have time to

exchange it for something else.

I guess my lame dress isn't

quite as lame as yours now.

Okay, neither of you can go

in that dress 'cause then I'll

be too embarrassed to be seen

with either of you.

Give them to me.

♪

There, now they're both

somewhat cool.

Nikki, these are awesome.

I know.

So are we all friends now?

Definitely.

Ooh, the movies are about to

start.

Cool.

Let's do it.

Sweet.

Ahh.

Actually guys, I don't feel so

good.

Oh no.

Oh Jen.

I've done something really

wrong.

What are you talking about?

I'm the one who stole your

dress.

I think we should get you to

the washrooms fast.

[Groaning and farting]

JEN: Ah, this feels just like

the time I ate mushrooms at "El

Sporto's."

Must have been something you

ate.

Ohh!

Okay, Jen don't worry I'm not

going to leave your side until

this is all over, okay?

I'll just wait for you outside

the door.

JEN: Okay.

Nikki it's horrible.

Who knew mushrooms could be that

gross.

Oh I know.

I was with her that day at "El

Sporto's."

Where did Jen get the mushrooms?

She's usually really careful

about that.

Okay, maybe I shared my pizza

kebab with her and maybe I

didn't tell her what's in it.

Hmm.

But I didn't know it would be

this bad.

It's not like I made her eat

it.

She just took it.

She would have eaten it even if

I wasn't there.

But you were.

And now you're going to be in

there by her side until she

feels better.

[Sighing]

Enjoy the movie.

JEN: Yuck.

Oh, so sick!

Do I know how to cure a

broken heart or what, dude?

I do feel a bit better.

So then the guy asks...

Whoa.

Now I feel much better.

Dude.

Aren't your parents at the

mall today?

What if they see us?

Oh relax.

They'd never come to a movie

like this.

Right.

Soup?

I got fired today but they felt

bad that I missed my dinner

break so I got some free soup.

Score.

Looking good, Mr. and Mrs.

Wong.

Thanks, dude.

Aren't Nikki and Jonesy back

there?

Excuse me, can we just get

by-- Ohh!

Nikki?

Mom?

Dad?

What are you wearing?

Jude?!

♪