04x05 - Poor Mr. Wilson

[bunniefuu]

[doorbell ringing]

-Mr. Wilson!

Mr. Wilson!

Oh hi, Mr. Wilson.

-Yes, Dennis?

-Do you need any work

done around the house?

-Like what and how

much will it cost me?

-Well, burning

leaves, $ . an hour.

-The leaves are

still on the trees.

-I can shake them off

for $ . an hour.

-No thank you.

-How about letting

me wash your car?

-I don't think it needs it.

Well, pretty clever car.

-I'll only charge

you $ , Mr. Wilson.

And I'll do a real good job.

-Well, I don't--

-Remember what you said

the last time I washed it?

-Yes, I do.

I said be sure and roll up the

windows before you hose it off.

-Thanks, Mr. Wilson!

You bet I will!

I sure will!

Bye!

-Uh, weh, uh weh, uh well.

Uh--

[theme music]

-Ugh!

No use, Eloise.

I haven't got the

strength to lift it.

Well, I used to be able to

do that in the old days.

When I got some nourishment.

-Dear, you've only been

on a diet for two days.

-Well, it seems like two weeks.

-You had a good lunch.

-Oh marvelous.

Cup of hot tea and two prunes.

-Two?

There was only one pit

left on your plate.

-Well, I have to

have some solid food.

-Dear, would you move this

table out into the hall for me?

It has to go out to be repaired.

Besides, the

upholsterers are coming

and I want it out of the way.

-Can I get Dennis to help me?

-John, I don't like spring

cleaning any better than you.

-Well you must.

You do it every year.

-John.

-[gasps] John!

-Ah!

Dear my!

Don't sneak up on me like that!

-What are you doing?

Reminiscing

-Put it back.

-Oh, all right.

-There.

The people from the

Uptown Aid Society

are coming to pick this up.

-Oh Eloise!

-I don't know who's suffering

more from this diet, you or me.

Mmm, you have any money?

-Are you going to sell

me something to eat?

-[laughs] No dear.

I just remembered I have to give

the upholsterers a deposit when

they pick up the furniture.

-Oh.

Well, I've got--

-What's the matter?

-There's a hole in my pocket.

-[gasps]

-I've lost all of my money.

Eloise, if you'd spend more

time sewing my clothes instead--

-Where did you lose it?

-Well, I went to the hardware

store, then the drug store.

And I had $ left when I

got to Quigley's Market,

and then I went-- I bet I

lost it at Quigley's Market.

-Call him up.

Maybe somebody found it.

I can give the

upholsterers a check.

-Dennis.

-Yes, Mr. Wilson?

-Never mind.

Well, that's a very

good job, Dennis.

-Thanks, Mr. Wilson.

Would you mind paying me now?

You see, Tommy's coming over--

-Oh certainly, certainly.

Oh, I'm sorry, Dennis.

I forgot.

I'll have to pay you later.

I lost all my money

in the market.

-Well, that's OK.

I'll trust you.

-Well, thank you, Dennis.

I wish all of my creditors were

as understanding as you are.

-See you later, Mr. Wilson.

-All right.

-Boy, it sure is neat.

-Yeah.

It's worth a lot more than $ .

I wouldn't be selling it at all,

except my dad made me give up

model airplanes for

stamp collecting.

-I'll take model

airplanes any day.

-Well, don't start the

motor in the house on Sunday

morning when your

dad's sleeping,

or you'll be

collecting stamps too.

You got the $ ?

-Well, I've got it

but I haven't got it.

-What do you mean?

-Well, I washed

Mr. Wilson's car,

but he couldn't pay me because

he didn't have any money.

-Didn't have any money?

-No.

He lost it in the market.

-Boy, that's tough.

The same thing happened

to my Uncle Fred.

He lost all his money

in the market too.

Buying on margin or something.

-I wonder if that's what

happened to Mr. Wilson?

-Sure, if he lost his money.

Dad said if the market goes

down, you're wiped out.

-Oh, Mr. Wilson's

too smart for that.

-So was my Uncle Fred.

The first thing you

know, he lost his car.

Then his TV set.

And they took away

his furniture!

-Well, that won't

happen to Mr. Wilson.

-On no?

Look!

-Jeepers!

Poor Mr. Wilson.

DENNIS (OFFSCREEN):

But Tommy said--

-Yes, I know what Tommy said.

But just because it

happened to his uncle,

doesn't mean it

happened to Mr. Wilson.

-But he didn't even have $

to pay me for washing his car.

-Mr. Wilson's hardly

the type to risk

everything he has

in the stock market.

-But we saw them take

away his furniture.

-Dennis, don't you think

if anything were wrong,

Mr. Wilson would have

mentioned it to us?

-I don't know, Mom.

Mr. Wilson's a

very sensitive man.

--[laughs] Well, I wouldn't

worry about it if I were--

-But Tommy said--

-Dennis, are you

ready to go downtown

with your mother and me?

-Yes sir.

-Good.

-I've got to run

upstairs and change.

Oh Dennis, will you please

take the pie out of the oven

when the timer bell rings?

-Sure, Mom.

-Why, that used to be my job.

-I know.

No sampling.

-That's how I lost my job.

-Four hours, minutes,

and seconds til dinner.

I don't think I'll make it.

[timer rings]

MR. WILSON (OFFSCREEN):

Psst, psst, psst.

-Oh, Mr. Wilson.

-Dennis, are you alone?

-Yes sir.

-May I come in?

-Sure.

What can I do for

you, Mr. Wilson?

-Oh, why uh, um, uh

nothing, uh Dennis.

Nothing, nothing at all.

I was just sitting on my

patio--oh is that a pie?

-Yeah.

Strawberry.

-Strawberry!

Dennis, do you suppose

your mother would

let you give me

piece of that pie?

-I'll ask her.

-No, no!

Don't ask her.

Dennis, I'm starving.

I haven't had a decent

meal in two days.

-Well, gee.

Come on.

Sit down.

Let's see.

We've got, we've got

some swell pot roast.

-Oh!

John, where have you been?

-Oh uh, I was over visiting

the Mitchells. [singing softly]

-John?

Did you have anything

to eat over there?

-Eat?

Well, how can you ask that?

-You haven't been this

happy in two days.

-Well, maybe I'm lightheaded.

Malnutrition. [singing softly]

-John, are you sure you

didn't have anything to eat?

-Eloise, have you seen

my smoking jacket?

-Oh, it was in that

bundle of things

I gave to the Aid Society.

-You did what?

-Well dear, it was

practically in shreds.

-Eloise!

You know how attached

I was to that jacket.

-Well dear, buy

yourself a new one.

-Well, I liked the old one.

-Then you'll just

have to get it back.

-Don't think I won't.

Uh, what was the

name of that place?

-The Uptown Aid Society.

-Where is it?

-Downtown.

-What's the Uptown Aid

Society doing downtown?

-Well, it was uptown

when they built it.

-Oh.

I'll find it.

-John, I apologize.

-Well, you should.

Giving away my favorite jacket!

-Oh no, not that.

For suspecting you of

having had anything to eat.

You're still your same

grumpy old hungry self.

-We'll have to stop at

Quigley's on the way home.

I think we're all out of milk.

-Oh.

Looks like you're

out of everything.

-Well that's funny.

There was a half a

pot roast in there.

-And what happened to that pie?

-I can't imagine.

-Hi Mom, hi Dad.

You all ready?

-Dennis, what happened to all

the food that was in here?

-And the pie?

-Do I have to tell you?

-Well, we'd like to know.

-Well, Mr. Wilson ate it.

-Uh, uh, our Mr.

Wilson next door?

-Yes, sir.

He was starving.

-But Dennis, if Mr. Wilson was

here, why didn't you call us?

-He wouldn't let me.

I told you, he's

a sensitive man.

-Come along, young man.

We'll discuss this

on the way downtown.

-But Dad!

-Never mind.

-Hey, where you going, Jack?

-Why, inside.

-What are you, a privileged

character or something?

-Yeah!

Get in line!

-What for?

I'm just going to get

my smoking jacket.

-Smoking jacket?

How 'bout that, [inaudible]?

-Do tell.

I'm getting fitted

for a tuxedo myself.

Going twisting tonight with Liz.

-Now look here--

-Hey hey, wise guy, if

you want fried chicken,

get in line like everybody else.

-I just want to

go-- fried chicken?

-Yeah.

That's the speciality

of the house.

-Well, fried chicken!

-We'll save you a finger bone!

-Smoking jacket!

-Hey!

There's Mr. Wilson!

-Where?

-Standing in that line.

-Uptown Aid Society?

-What do they do there?

-They give away free meals.

-Free meals?

You see?

I told you, Dad.

It wasn't nonsense.

-Poor Mr. Wilson.

-Oh my goodness, I

better get your dinner.

-Uh Eloise, I'm not hungry.

-Not hungry?

Oh John, I'm proud of you.

-Thank you.

[doorbell rings]

-Oh hello, Henry.

-Hi, Mrs. Wilson.

-Hello, Henry.

-Oh hi, John.

-Come on in.

-I haven't seen you

around lately, John.

I just thought I'd drop

over and see how things are.

-Rough.

-Oh, really bad, huh?

-Oh, you have no idea.

Sit down, sit down.

-Oh thanks.

-They took away the living

room furniture today.

They're going to pick up the

dining room set tomorrow.

-Well, we could

loan you something.

-Oh that's all right.

Don't worry about us.

We'll manage.

-Oh of course you will.

It's always darkest

before the dawn.

John?

-Yes?

-I'd like to ask you something.

-What is it, Henry?

-Well, it's, it's

kind of personal.

Now, now we've been

friends for a long time.

And well, a, a friend in

need is a friend indeed.

-A friend in need

is a friend indeed.

Henry uh, what are

you trying to say?

-Well, if a friend

is in trouble,

I think that he

should go to a friend

and, and see if there's

anything he needs.

-Why certainly.

-I'm glad you feel that

way about it, John.

I'm sure that if

I were in trouble,

I could come to you just

as you could come to me.

-Well of course!

We're friends, aren't we?

-We sure are.

Well, I'll see you, John.

-See you, Henry.

-What's Henry want?

-If I didn't know

him so well, I'd

swear he was trying

to borrow some money.

-There you are, Dennis.

-Thanks, Mr. Quigley.

The people will appreciate this.

I'd tell you who they are, but

I don't want to embarrass them.

-Oh, I understand Dennis.

Now if they need anything

else, you let me know.

-Thanks, Mr. Quigley.

Bye!

-Bye.

[horn honking]

-Morning, Quigley.

-Good morning, John.

I suppose you came for

that money you lost.

-Yep, yep.

-I found it right

near the meat counter.

-Ah.

-$ .

-It was $ .

-I thought you might

want to offer a reward.

-Your reward is the

satisfaction in knowing

that you're an honest man.

-That kind of reward

is hard to spend.

-Was that Dennis?

-Yes.

Now there's a real generous boy.

Do you know what he's doing?

He's collecting food--

groceries-- for a poor family.

-Oh, that's odd.

He didn't ask me to contribute.

-It's probably 'cause he

knows you're such a tightwad.

-Oh, is that so?

Well, I am not one to turn my

back on anyone who's hungry.

-I hear you talking, but I

don't see you contributing.

-Here.

Uh, take the $ and

put it in the kitty.

Tell Dennis he can get

another load of groceries

for that needy family tomorrow.

-You want to contribute

the whole $ ?

-That's right.

The whole $ .

-John, are you sure that

hole was in your pocket?

[doorbell rings]

-Where'd you leave them?

-On the doorstep.

I hope he finds them all right.

[crashing sounds]

-Oh John, what happened?

-Eloise, who left all

this junk on the porch?

-I don't know.

It must have been

delivered by mistake.

-Mistake?

Well I-- candied yams!

-$ . , that's my

whole allowance.

Sure hope Mr. Wilson

appreciates it.

-Thanks, Howie.

He will.

But don't forget, us kids

aren't telling anybody

that we're doing

this for Mr. Wilson.

-Boy, a show in

your own backyard.

-Yeah.

And it'll start

in a few minutes.

Go on in.

-OK.

-Hi Dennis.

-Hi Seymour.

-Here's $ . and

three bottle caps.

-Thanks, Seymour.

-I had to drink the three

bottles of root beer

to get the $ .

back on the bottles.

-Mr. Wilson will appreciate it.

-That's OK.

Root beer's my favorite drink.

-Go on in and sit down.

-How we doing, Dennis?

-Pretty good, Tommy.

$ . and three bottle caps.

-So what's the frog for?

[frog croaks]

-Oh, that belongs

to Artie Robinson.

I'm holding it for

security til he

gets the money his

brother owes him.

-Great.

Let's get the show on the road.

-Yes sir.

Come on, fellas.

Everybody sit down!

Everybody sit down!

-Yay!

-Ladies and gentlemen, our

first star act will be Margaret.

[cheers and applause]

-Doing her famous

Hawaiian hula dance.

Music, maestro.

[hula music playing]

[cheers and applause]

[hula music playing]

[cheers and applause]

-That was great, Margaret.

Really great!

Our next star act will be

yours truly, Dennis Mitchell,

performing a feat of magic.

May I have a volunteer

from the audience?

-Dennis.

-Oh no, not you Mr. Wilson.

I couldn't saw you in half.

I couldn't even

get you in the box.

-Dennis, I did not come over

here to be sawn in half.

Now look here Dennis, I

am trying to do some work.

-You mean you're

gonna sell a story?

-If my editor likes it.

-Well gee, we don't

want to interfere

with that at a time like this.

Come on, everybody.

Let's get out of here so Mr.

Wilson can earn some money.

-Goodbye, Mr. Wilson.

I hope you sell your story.

-Well uh--

-Good luck, Mr. Wilson.

Good luck.

-Well, wait a minute.

Don't, don't, don't go.

-Good luck, Mr. Wilson.

We're rooting for you.

-Oh.

Oh, thank you.

Well, oh Dennis.

I'm sorry.

I didn't mean to

break up your show.

-Hmm.

Mr. Wilson?

May I talk to you man to man?

-Well yes, I guess so.

-Well, I don't think

it's right to keep

b*ating around the bush.

-b*ating around the bush?

-Yeah.

Here.

-What's this?

-It's the money we

took in from the show.

$ . and three bottle caps.

There'll be more when Artie

Robinson redeems his frog.

-Oh, you want me

to hold it for you.

-No, sir.

It's yours.

-Mine?

-Yes, sir.

It's probably not enough

to get your furniture back,

but maybe it'll help.

And I guess you

found the groceries

I left on your doorstep.

-Oh, you were the one

who left those there?

-Yes, sir.

Now you won't have to stand

in line at the Aid Society.

-Dennis--

-It could be worse, Mr. Wilson.

You still got your

television set and your car.

You're a lot luckier

than Tommy's uncle.

-Well Dennis, I

don't understand.

-The same thing happened to

him that happened to you.

He lost all his money

in the stop market.

-Stock market?

Whatever gave you such an idea?

-Well, yesterday when

I washed your car,

you said you couldn't

pay me because you

lost all your money

in the market.

-That's right.

Quigley's Market.

-Quigley's?

-Yeah, I had a

hole in my pocket.

-But they took away

your furniture.

-To be reupholstered.

-But you were starving.

-I'm on a diet.

-But the Uptown Aid Society.

-I went there to pick

up my smoking jacket.

-Well gee, it sure

sounds different

when you put that way.

-Well yes, I, I guess it does.

-Well, I'm sure

glad it's not true.

I was worried about

you, Mr. Wilson.

We all thought you were broke.

-Dennis, if I didn't

have a single penny,

I'd be the richest man in the

world with a friend like you.

-Jeepers, this

sure is nice of you

to do this for us, Mr. Wilson.

-Why, it's my pleasure Dennis.

Would, would you

like another one?

-I sure would.

This one even tastes

better than the first one.

-The first one.

[clears throat] How's your

uh, banana split, Seymour?

-Swell.

I'm sure glad you lost

your money in the market.

-Well, thank you.

-[gasps]

[smack]

-Mrs. Wilson!

-Ah ah ah ah!

John!

-Stool pigeon.

-[clears throat]

[clinks glass]

-May I have your attention

a moment, please?

Uh, I suppose some

of you are wondering

about the reason for

this little party.

Well, it's just my way

of saying thank you

to Dennis and to all of you for

your concern about my welfare.

Naturally, I'm delighted that

it's all a misunderstanding.

But I did find out that I

have some wonderful and loyal

friends that I can count

on if I really need help.

And uh, thank you.

[applause]

-Uh, will that be

all, Mr. Wilson?

-Oh uh, I guess so.

-All right, there's the check.

-All right.

And here you are.

$ . and three bottle caps.

--[laughs] Uh, Mr. Wilson,

the uh, check is $ . .

-Uh, $ . .

Oh yeah. [laughs]

Well-- [inaudible].

Henry?

Uh Henry, uh, this

is rather personal.

Uh well, after all, we have

been friends for a long time.

Well, the darkest hour is

just before-- a friend in need

is a friend indeed?

-Don't worry, Mr. Wilson.

If you haven't got

the money, I'll

stay and help you

wash the dishes.

[laughter]

-Oh!

[theme music]